


Sha'kajir

by Maggie_GoldenStar1530



Series: Dar'Manda [3]
Category: The Mandalorian (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Gen, I ain't bothered, Implied Sexual Content, Mandalorian Culture, Mando'a, Not Canon Compliant for Season 2, Post-Season/Series 01, Protective Siblings, Religious Conflict, Romance, dumbasses in love, mando culture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-16
Updated: 2020-12-31
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:34:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 53
Words: 194,789
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23683987
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maggie_GoldenStar1530/pseuds/Maggie_GoldenStar1530
Summary: Sha'kajir: over a meal, at the dinner table, like the French *table* - the word for table comes from the word for level, flat, so the implication is one of equals breaking bread together or cease-fire, truce (from the practice of sitting down at a table with refreshments to talk terms, as in the same term for *over a meal*).The remains of the Covert from Navarro joins with another Covert, and each sect has different interpretations of the Creed and the Way. What this means for a dar'manda just looking for a home remains to be seen.Part 3 of Dar'Manda- Din, and the Kid, and Teryn continue to figure out how family works, and so does everyone else. Also Gideon is still out there.
Relationships: Baby Yoda & The Mandalorian (The Mandalorian TV), The Mandalorian (The Mandalorian TV) & Original Female Character(s), The Mandalorian (The Mandalorian TV)/Original Female Character(s)
Series: Dar'Manda [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1636489
Comments: 306
Kudos: 130





	1. No, it's much better to face these things with a sense of poise and rationality

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Navarro Covert meet a whole bunch of new people when they arrive at the Covert on Samaki.
> 
> Yes, you might have read this chapter before as Chapter 18 of Dar'Buy'ce, but I realized that this chapter really was the beginning of this story of how the two Coverts trying to learn to live together. So instead of just grumbling about it, I fixed it. Enjoy!

The Foundlings had all fallen asleep in a pile, except the Kid. He had gone back up to the cockpit with Din and Paz. He wanted his buir more than the pile and Din was okay with this, he worried about the Kid being squished.

He knew that was a slightly ridiculous worry, but the Kid was very small.

“We need to pick a name, for you, ad’ika.” Din murmured. “I was thinking we’d maybe find your people and discover you already had one, but… I think we should pick one. What do you think?”

The Kid merped quietly from where he was snuggled into Din’s cuirass. 

“Okay, we’ll think about it.” 

Teryn twitched in her sleep and Cuan tightened his arm around her until she quieted. He had a feeling she wouldn’t be sleeping well for the foreseeable future, but for the moment she was resting, and that was good. 

He’d been too enraged and terrified, and then just relieved that she was alive and with him to focus his attention on how to introduce the two tribes. But now, with not much time left before they got to Samaki, he had nothing to do but think about but how this was going to work. 

They knew that the Covert that had taken him in needed a new place to live, and his Chief had agreed to speak to the Armorer on that subject. He’d told his people that this Tribe was more traditional, more conservative, were deeply protective of their names (hell, he didn’t know the names of almost anyone) and would need separate quarters- fortunately, that was easy, there were several buildings they weren’t using. As for the details- how they would begin to figure out how they would live together, that was beyond his pay grade. Would they want their Foundlings trained separately? What would happen if one of them decided to live by his Tribe’s customs, and not their own? Or vice versa? 

And, he looked down at Teryn, what about her?

He’d told Teryn the truth- he didn’t know how his tribe was going to react to him bringing her home. But he hadn’t told them about her. When he’d told her that they wouldn’t consider her helmet being removed by another Mandalorian- one who was supposed to be an ally- to cause her to become dar’manda, that was… well, it was probably the truth. The idea was just so appalling that he’d never really thought about it. Removing your helmet yourself, or losing it in battle was one thing, but that? 

The fact that they hadn’t allowed her to even come home to explain her side of the story… that filled him with such cold rage. It was bad enough to have been betrayed by that coward. But then to have that betrayal compounded by her own tribe… and then she’d had to kill him _herself_. 

He was impressed that she’d survived it. He could tell that the mere fact of surviving it had been impossibly difficult, but she’d come out the other side. Battered, bruised in her soul (she still had one, no matter what she thought), but still standing. 

But she’d lived outside of the Creed for over ten years. When she’d said she wasn’t auretii, she was just complicated, she wasn’t kidding. 

He hadn’t told them about Arkil, either. He wanted to break that news in person, not in a coded communication. 

This homecoming was going to be  _ awkward _ . 

She jerked sharply and went rigid, and her breathing suddenly became tight and rapid. “Hey. Mesh’la, it’s okay.” He could see her blinking, and he kept murmuring until she turned to look at him. “Nightmare?” She nodded. “Ger morut’yc. It’s okay.”

She sat up and rubbed her eyes. “I think this is going to go on for a while.” 

“Probably.” He rested the forehead of his helmet on the side of her head until she relaxed and was able to breathe normally. 

She started untangling her hair with her fingers as they dropped out of hyperspace with a jolt. Teryn nudged the Foundling pile to wake them up. The Foundlings all made a scramble for their helmets, and Cuan went up to the cockpit to handle the approach to his Covert.

On the plus side, he thought, he did succeed in his original mission. He did have solid intel about Gideon. 

The Talon followed the Razor Crest down and landed in a clearing near two other ships. Teryn stared at the hatch as it opened, and so did the Foundlings. Paz, Din, and Cuan climbed down from the cockpit. Cuan went to the carton that had Arkil’s armor in it- he’d retrieved it from the Talon at the rendez-vous stop so he could carry it out, and stared down at it for a long minute. Teryn came up behind him and rested her chin on his shoulder. 

“I’m sorry I couldn’t save him.” 

“I know you tried everything you could.” He took a deep breath and picked up Arkil’s helmet, and looked at it, running his fingers along the ridges. She squeezed his arms firmly, and stepped back. He carefully placed the helmet on top of the carton, picked it up and slowly headed to the hatch, but stopped to give her one last look. She swallowed, and then let him watch as she arranged her face into the mask that hid any anxiety. 

He left the Razor Crest first, followed by Din and Paz. Din carried the Kid, and the Foundlings followed in line. Teryn came last. The group from the Talon had arranged themselves behind the Armorer, and Paz went to her side. The Foundlings all arranged themselves by their buire, and even the littlest ones were wearing their helmets. Everyone, except for the Kid and Teryn. Teryn tried to quietly fade to the back, but Din made a quick motion with his hand to tell her to come to his side, near the front. The only reaction she allowed with a minuscule tightening around her mouth, but she did as he asked. 

Cuan went forward to a group of three people, his Chief, a tall woman in dark red armor like his own, a large man who had a hammer on his belt, clearly an Armorer, and a third person, who stood behind them. She looked down at the armor he carried, and nodded. Their Armorer reached forward and picked up Arkil’s helmet, and looked at Cuan. Cuan nodded, bowing his head.

The Chief dismissed him, and he went towards the buildings at the far edge of the valley, where Teryn could see a number of people- some of whom were without helmets. She took a deep breath and the Chief and the other Armorer walked over to the group. Teryn fought the urge to glance at Din. The Chief gave her a sharp look before addressing the Armorer. 

“Greetings. You are welcome here, Verda. We understand your journey has been long and fraught. We have quarters prepared for you, so that you may rest and get settled before introductions are made.”

The Armorer nodded. “Vor entye.” 

The Chief gestured to the third person. “This is our al’verde, Ademe. She will show you to your quarters, and answer any immediate questions and needs you might have.” Ademe nodded at them all and gestured for them to follow her, while the Chief and the other Armorer turned and followed Cuan’s path. 

Teryn gave Cuan’s back another looked before glancing at Din. Din gave a minuscule shrug back, and they followed the rest of the refugees to their quarters. 

Cuan trudged to the main part of the complex with Arkil’s armor feeling heavier and heavier with each step. As he passed by people, they realized what he was carrying, and what it meant, and an unnatural hush spread through them. 

“Ba’vodu!” a voice called, and he closed his eyes. “Ba’vodu! Where’s Bui-” 

A lanky teenage girl came running up, just barely old enough to have taken the Creed, and skidded to a stop, staring down at the carton. “Nayc…”

“I’m sorry, Atriu.” Cuan said gently.

“What happened?” 

“We got ambushed on Lutrilla. We were helped by two other Mando’ade, but… his injuries were too severe, and he didn’t make it.” 

“Ni su’cuyi, gar kyr, advc, ni partayli, gar darsuum, buir.” she said quietly, laying her hand on Arkil’s helmet. “We should tell ba’buir.” 

Cuan nodded. “I need to talk with alor, and give my report, but she knows I wanted to see you both, first.”

“Are those people from the Covert that rescued you?”

Cuan nodded. “They needed to move on from where they were hiding. Alor offered to let them stay here for a while.” 

Atriu nodded and followed him into one of the buildings. In one of the rooms on the ground floor, an older Mandalorian sat near a heater. He turned his head at their entrance, ears cocked at the sounds, but his eyes didn’t focus. “I hear Atriu, and…. ah, bu’ad. But only one of you?”

Cuan approached slowly. “Ba’buir.” 

“Cuan. Where is your vod?”

“He’s marching far away.” Cuan took his grandfather's hand and placed Arkil’s helmet into it. 

The older man bowed his head to the helmet, touching his forehead to it, and repeated the remembrance for the dead, adding the name of his son and other grandchild who had been killed in the Purge. Cuan removed his own helmet, and he and Atriu also bowed their heads, as they sat in silence together. 

The old man looked up. “Did I hear two ships landing?”

“Yes. We have guests.” 

“Hmmmmm.” He cocked his head at Cuan. “More than just guests, I think. You can introduce her to me when they get settled.” 

Not for the first time, Cuan wondered if his grandfather was a sorcerer. He always seemed to know just slightly more than Cuan or Arkil had planned to let on. “I need to give my report to alor. We buried him on Jelucan, but they were not able to give him the full rites he deserved, nor did they know him.”

“We will do right by him, ad’ika.” The old man patted Cuan’s cheek. “He had a warrior’s death?”

“Their healer tried her best, but in the end all she could do was sing him to sleep. He wasn’t alone.” 

The chief of the Samaki Tribe, Rima, sat in her rooms off the Forge, waiting for Cuan to come make his report. She had taken leadership of the Tribe several years before, when Tuathal Tadasco relinquished his place after he went blind. Their Armorer, Sadet, was brilliant with metal, but not interested in leadership. The fact that this new Tribe’s armorer was also their chief was interesting.

Also interesting was the unhelmeted woman with them. She had armor, though it was unpainted and unadorned, but no helmet. Not something she would have expected to see in this traditional Covert. 

At Cuan’s knock, she poured two glasses of net’ra gal and called for him to come in. “Su cuy’gar.”

“Su cuy’gar.” They toasted each other and took a seat. 

“Well. It seems you had quite a trip. I am sorry about Arkil.” Cuan nodded. “Start from the beginning.” 

“We were on Lutrilla- we’d heard that a warlord was setting himself up there, and wanted to check it out. I’m not sure what caused them to ambush us- it wasn’t Gideon, it was someone else- but they got the drop on us. Arkil was… he was impaled with a harpoon, and went down, and I had a broken ankle, when two other Mandalorians came to our rescue. I lost consciousness, and woke up as they were bringing us to their healer.” 

“Their healer wasn’t able to save him?”

“No.” Cuan bowed his head. It was hard to remember that he had lost one precious thing and gained another at the same time. “They buried him.”

“We will honor him tonight.” Cuan nodded in thanks. “Did you have any intelligence regarding Gideon?”

Cuan waited until she’d taken a sip before saying, “I saw him.”

She managed to not spit out the beer. “You what?” 

“The reason they had to evacuate Jelucan was because he had found them, and was about to attack. The… one of them was captured by his men, but was able to escape.” 

“I see. That person is here?” At Cuan’s nod, Rima tightened her jaw. Good. The more information they had, the better. “Does he have the Darksaber?”

“He does. And he’s used it.” 

Rima took a deep breath. Up until this point, the Darksaber rumors had been only rumors. There wasn’t any confirmation that Gideon had possession of it. Now they knew. Now it wasn’t just vengeance that required his death. It was a moral imperative to get the Darksaber back in the possession of the Mandalorians. 

“Tell me about the Tribe that you’ve brought here.” 

“They were on Navarro, originally.” Rima sucked in her breath. While there wasn’t much communication between Coverts- it was yet another security measure that protected them all, if Coverts didn’t know where others were- the rumors of the massacre of a group of Mandalorians had scattered outwards through the galaxy. In a people who’s secondary pastime was gossip, those rumors had reached Samaki, and they had mourned. 

“No wonder they’re jumpy.” She narrowed her eyes, thinking. “Are they part of the remnants of Death Watch?” 

“They are.” Cuan took another swig, nodding. “They are extremely reserved. I don’t know most of their names. I’ve never seen any of them without their helmets, except…” he paused. 

“Yes. I saw her. What’s her deal?” 

He took a deep breath. “She was betrayed by one of them. He removed her helmet and left her behind in order to escape enemies.” 

“Do we need to worry about him?”

“No.” Cuan said, flatly. 

“And they have allowed her to stay? I didn’t expect that from Death Watch.”

“They didn’t. They didn’t…” He clenched his jaw and put down his glass so he wouldn’t break it. “They didn’t even let her back to tell them what happened. She lived outside for over ten years. She was only allowed back because of Gideon.”

“...I see.” 

“She’s….” Cuan took a deep breath and thought about how he wanted to phrase this. “She’s deeply important.”

Rima looked at him speculatively. She and Cuan had known each other for most of their lives. “To you?”

“Yes.” He said, softly. “And to them, even if they can’t bring themselves to admit it.” He looked down at his feet. “She’s their healer- until she came back, they only had an apprentice medic.” 

“Hmmmm.” 

“I know she is a complication, but…”

Rima waved her hand. “It’s all complicated, vod. Every part of it.” 

“There’s another complication.” Cuan took another deep breath. “We know what Gideon is looking for. And they do have it.” 

“What is it?”

“A Foundling.”

Rima sat back. So much death over a child? “Well, fuck this guy.” 

Cuan smiled. “That’s what I thought you’d say.” 

The Navarro Tribe went into the building Ademe led them to. “This building had living apartments. They haven’t been used in decades, at least, but we got them cleaned up… mostly. There’s some furniture, and the power works… there’s a common room over here...” 

The Armorer looked around and nodded. It would more than do. The Foundlings all looked at the sky with some trepidation, and she noticed a few of the adults did, too. It had been quite some time since they’d lived above ground, and, she admitted to herself, it was…. strange. After a while the tunnels had felt comforting, not oppressive. They’d been safe. 

So much space above them was going to take some getting used to. 

After a quick tour, she called her people to the common room. “Unload personal items, and take them to the rooms you’ve chosen, and start thinking about things you might need. For now, we will leave the forge and other equipment on the ships until we have a better handle on the situation.” She looked at Teryn and Tabor. “The medical supplies…?”

Teryn glanced at Tabor and nodded at him. He straightened his shoulders. “I think we should also leave the medical equipment on the ships for now. We have medkits if anyone needs anything.” Teryn nodded in agreement. They’d talked about it, but she wanted him to get more comfortable with taking the lead on decisions, and standing be them. 

He’d come a long way in only a few months. 

Din picked rooms at the end of the building that had a view of a copse of trees from the window. He felt a little bit bad about taking such a good view when he wouldn’t be around all that much- someone still needed to provide for the Tribe, and that was still his job, but the Kid had made a beeline for the window and sat there, staring at the trees and then pointing. 

“Kurshi. Tree.” 

“Kur… Kurs...kurshi?” 

Din nodded. The Kid smiled and turned back to the window. So that was that. “Let’s go find your ba’vodu.”

They found Teryn in her own room, poking through the box of her things. “Vod’ika? I… I have something for you.” He held out his hand, and in it was a beskar mudhorn signet. She looked at him, speechless. “Alor made it before we left, I hadn’t had a chance to… I understand if you don’t want to wear it, but I want you to have it.” 

She took it and stared down at it for a long time, then back up at him. “Vor entye.”

“No. You don’t accept a debt. I should have done this a long time ago. I should have done a lot of things a long time ago.” He looked down. “I know you’re angry that I never tried to find you. I should have… I should have.” 

He tried to put his forehead on hers, and she flinched away. She ducked her head lower, so he could touch his forehead to the top of her head. The Kid wrapped his arms around them both as far as they could go. 

The Armorer sat down in her own rooms, pulled off her helmet, and rolled her neck. It had been a long, long day, and didn’t look to truly end any time soon. Figuring out how, or even if the two Coverts could integrate was going to take every bit of diplomacy and leadership she possessed. She knew that Din would be leaving soon, and likely taking his ad with him. As for Teryn, that was another question. But it could wait until later.

But her people were safe and that was the most important thing. 

As the Navarro Tribe was getting more or less settled, Cuan found Teryn in her own rooms, turning the mudhorn signet over in her hands. He’d politely put on his helmet before coming into the Navarro Tribe’s building. “How’s it going?”

“I think some of the Foundlings are a bit freaked out over the sky, but they’ll adjust.” 

“I have someone...well, two someones I want you to meet.” 

She gave him a worried look as he led her out, and slowed as people started to stare. She squeezed her hand. “Don’t worry about them.”

“Easy for you to say.” she muttered. She caught the eye of their al’verde, Ademe, and fought the urge to shrink back, and lifted her chin instead.  _ You might not have a soul, but you still have your pride.  _

Inside, Cuan led her back to the ground floor room, where Tuathal was still sitting, Arkil’s helmet still in his hands. He raised his head, and cocked his ear. “Ah, bu’ad. Who have you brought? I don’t recognize the step.” He set down the helmet, and Teryn sniffed cautiously. The heater was running full blast, and she could smell what was probably a topical medication for aching joints. He was wearing a cuirass, but it was light, and more decorative than functional. 

She couldn’t remember the last time she’d seen a Mandalorian that she could classify as legitimately old before. Certainly before the Purge. 

“Teryn, this is Tuathal Tadasco, my ba’buir. Ba’buir, this is…” Cuan paused, and squeezed Teryn’s hand, while she looked back at him uncertainly. “This is Teryn, from the other Covert. She’s…”

Tuathal smiled. “Gar cyare, I can tell.”  _ Your beloved. _ He gestured. “Come here, ad’ika, let me get a look at you.” 

Teryn paused and gave Cuan an incredulous look, and he shrugged as he took off his helmet. “He knows things. Just go with it. The rest of us do.” He gave her a gentle nudge forward. She stepped forward, and Tuathal took one of her hands in his. “You’re the healer.”

“...how?” 

“I can smell bacta and soap. Were you with Arkil?”

“Yes, I’m sorry, I couldn’t…”

He shook his head and waved at the seat next to him. “Sit, sit.” She sat, and he cocked his head. “You’re not wearing a helmet.” 

“No.” 

He reached up toward her face, and she jerked back, pulling her hand away. Cuan inhaled, just as Tuathal stopped, his plam inches from her cheek. He cocked his head and pulled his hand away. “ _ Oh. _ Oh, ad’ika, I am sorry.” 

Cuan could see her eyes had gone unfocused, and he stepped forward. “N’eparavu takisit, ba’buir, I should have warned you.” He carefully put a hand on Teryn’s arm. “LaarSenaar? Ger morut’yc.” She looked at him, blinking a few times before her eyes focused again. Cuan rested his forehead on the side of her head. “I’m sorry, I should have…”

She shook her head. “It’s…” She wanted to say _ it’s okay, it’s fine _ , but it was neither of those things. And they both knew it. 

She took a deep breath, and looked back at Tuathal, who had been listening to this with a mixture of sadness and softness on his face. “I’m glad to meet you.” 

“My bu’ad gets into scrapes. It’s good to have a healer with him.” Tuathal held out his hands again, and she took one, and carefully opened it up, looking at the bent fingers, and gently massaged his palm. 

“Joint pain?” 

“It’s not too bad in my hands, but my knees… when the weather gets nasty.” 

She hummed a bit. “How did you lose your sight?” 

“You don’t beat around the forge, do you?”

She smiled ruefully. “It’s easier than letting people ask questions about me.” 

“Not long after we found this place, I was off world when, like my bu’ad here, we got attacked by some Imps. Really, I was too old to be out like that, but pride makes it hard to give up what we love. I was too slow, and a flash grenade shorted out my helmet and burned my eyes.” 

She nodded. That would do it. 

“Ba’vodu? Who is that?”

Cuan took a deep breath. He hadn’t prepared Atriu or Teryn for this. He knew this was going to be awkward, but… 

“This is Teryn, she’s from the new covert.”

Atriu’s eyes fixated on the blue medic armband Teryn was wearing. “Is she the healer that couldn’t save my buir?” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mando'a Translations
> 
> ad’ika: Little one, kid  
> dar’manda: a state of not being Mandalorian - not an outsider, but one who has lost his heritage, and so his identity and his soul - regarded with absolute dread by most traditionall-minded Mando'ade  
> auretii: Outsider  
> Mesh’la: Beautiful  
> Buir: Parent (plural: buire)  
> Verda: warriors (archaic plural)  
> Vor entye: Thank you (lit: I accept a debt)  
> Ba’vodu: parent's sibling  
> al’verde: Commander  
> Nyac: No  
> Ni su’cuyi, gar kyr, advc, ni partayli, gar darsuum: Daily remembrance of those passed on *I'm still alive, but you are dead. I remember you, so you are eternal.* Followed by repetition of loved ones' names.  
> Alor: Chief  
> bu’ad: grandchild  
> Ba’buir: Grandparent  
> vod: brother or comrade/mate  
> net’ra gal: black ale - sweet, almost spicy black beer similar to milk stout  
> Su cuy’gar: hello (lit: you're still alive)  
> Gar cyare: "Your beloved" (grandparents are adorable and also embarassing)  
> N’eparavu takisit: I'm sorry (I eat my insult)  
> LaarSenaar: Songbird


	2. I'm going there, no more to roam

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the Navarro Covert begins to settle in, there's a funeral, a Foundling swears the Creed, and the Kid gets a name. 
> 
> (With some apologies to Michael Crichton, but not many)

“Is she the healer that couldn’t save my buir?” 

This was going  _ great _ . 

Cuan took a deep breath, as Teryn looked at him with appalled annoyance. “You might have mentioned.” She muttered. 

He winced. “Yeah.” Tuathal sighed. 

Atriu scowled, and Teryn took a deep breath. This wasn’t the first angry relative she’d had to deal with, nor the first angry kid. Not by a long shot. “Yes.” 

Atriu’s chin wobbled. “Why?”

“Why wasn’t I able to save him?” 

“Why are you here?” 

Teryn looked at Cuan again, and he grimaced. “I brought her here to meet you and ba’buir, she’s…”

“You’re fucking her.” 

“Bu’ad!” Tuathal snapped. “You will apologize.” 

“I’m not going to apologize because he couldn’t keep his hands off the veriduur who killed my buir.” She looked Teryn up and down with scorn. “You’re not even a real vod. You’d have a helmet if you were.” 

“Atriu!” Cuan thundered. 

“What? They wear helmets. We all know. And she doesn’t have one.” 

“You will not treat any guest with such disrespect.” 

Teryn glanced down at her hands and then looked up at Atriu, controlling the shaking in her voice. “I’m going to leave you alone with your family. If you want to know more about what happened, you can find me.” Cuan looked at her with an apologetic expression, and she waved him off.  _ Deal with this, first. _ He nodded.

“I was waiting. I was waiting to swear the Creed until he got home.” Atriu’s face entirely crumpled, and she collapsed into her great-grandfather’s lap.    
  


Teryn made her way back to the Nevarro Covert’s building, avoiding eye contact with anyone using a thousand yard stare. Eyes up, back straight, chin held high, walking with purpose. Nothing worked better than walking with purpose to keep people from bothering you when you just wanted to get from point A to point B. 

Back in her own rooms, she let her face relax from the mask- it was hard, trying to keep every thought and every emotion from flickering across your face, especially when everyone you saw could keep their thoughts hidden behind a helmet. It was just hard. She massaged the muscles under her jawline. 

Keeping her face calm after Atriu’s outburst had been even harder. She’s been called a killer, a murderer, even a sadist before. Nothing Atriu had said was new, Or even unexpected, once she’d gotten a handle on the situation. But the surprise hadn’t been ideal. 

Cuan should have prepared her- hell, prepared them both for that. A lot had happened since they’d made the decision to come to Samaki (really, a great deal, and it had all happened very quickly) and he’d said he wasn’t great at tact. That was the stars’ honest truth. 

Maybe the kid would be more amenable to talking after the shock had worn off. Perhaps. If this was going to work, if any of this was going to work, then they’d need to come to some sort of detent. 

She couldn’t let her face relax long before there was a knock on the door. H’lava, her friend from the Navarro covert, and her five-year-old Foundling Ionnas, barged in. “Well?”

Teryn rolled her eyes. “You’re aware that you’re just an incurable gossip, right?”

“I am. I’m teaching him how. It’s part of his education. So? Is he sleeping here, or are you going to be over there?” Teryn looked at her incredulously, and H’lava waved her hand in a dismissal. “Everyone knows you haven’t slept alone for several nights at this point. So?” 

“I don’t… know. We didn’t get that far.” Teryn grimaced. “He’s… his brother had a Foundling. She’s not… doing well.”

“Ohhhhhhhh. He didn’t tell you?”

Teryn shook her head, and H’lava groaned. “He didn’t tell her about me, either. I did meet his ba’buir, though. He’s uh. He’s nice, but kind of odd?”

“Odd how?”

“He’s blind and he… knows things? It’s weird, I don’t know how to explain it.” 

The Armorer stood in the Samaki forge, and observed their Armorer. He was a large man, and hadn’t looked up when she entered, or acknowledged her in any way. She wasn’t sure if he’d even noticed. Even when she was deep into the song of the metal, she’d always known when someone entered her forge. 

Yet another thing to get used to, she supposed. At least he was wearing a helmet. 

“I know it looks like he only cares about the metal, but he always is aware of the people inside. It’s just hard to tell sometimes.” 

The Armorer turned to see Rima standing next to her, holding her helmet, and smiling slightly. The Armorer nodded, and Rima gestured to her rooms. “Can I get you anything to drink or eat?” 

“No. Thank you.” 

“I realized I didn’t give you my name when I greeted you earlier. I am Rima Mairn, of Clan Lytau, alor of this Covert.” 

The Armorer nodded. Rima narrowed her eyes slightly. “I understand that you do not give out your names easily.....”

“My people may make the decision to share their names, or not. I chose to not share mine.” 

Rima nodded. “I understand. Are your quarters adequate? I thought the building furthest away from our spaces would be most desirable for your needs.” 

“Yes, thank you.” The Armorer paused, thinking of exactly what she wanted to say. “We are in your debt for allowing us to come to your doorstep with little warning. We did not expect to need to relocate quite so… abruptly. I had hoped to be able to discuss things with you with less urgency. I fear we may end up bringing danger to your doorstep.”

“Both the hunter and the prey, isn’t that right? There are precious few of us, after the Purge. We are glad to help.” 

The Armorer hummed. “It is still not an easy ask.” 

“Cuan Tadasco told me of your… customs.” Rima raised an eyebrow, making it clear she was talking about the helmets. 

“Once we have taken the Creed, we only remove them in the presence of immediate family. Parents and children. No one else.” 

“I see.” 

“This is the Way.”

Rima sat back. This was not the time to get into a religious debate. “We are in your debt for taking in Cuan and Arkil. I know it may not have been an easy decision.”

“It was an easy decision. They are Mando’ade. My warriors did not hesitate to help them, nor did they hesitate to bring them back. My al’baar’ur-” Rima noticed the stress on the “my” “-tried as hard as she could to save your vod.” 

“I do not blame her, though....” Rima cocked her head speculatively. “May I ask you about her?”

“I suspect that you’ve been given a report already.” 

“I have. I’m asking you.” 

The Armorer took a deep breath. “She was betrayed by one of our own. She is now dar’manda.” 

Rima narrowed her eyes. “Is she.” 

“Her helmet was removed by another. This is the Way.” 

Rima sat back, not agreeing at all. “Yet you allow her to stay.” 

“It is in all of our interests if she is protected with us.” 

“I see.” 

The Armorer gazed at Rima, considering. “I know that you are aware that Gideon is looking for something. Something you suspect that we might have.”

Rima smiled, dangerously. “I know you have it. I know it’s a Foundling.”

The Armorer straightened up. “If you are threatening…"

“I am not. This is a Foundling. Foundlings are the future. We are not so different.” Rima’s smile deepened. “We protect our Foundlings, just as you do. Judging from your numbers, you protected your Foundlings when you were attacked in Navarro. We will do the same.”

The Armorer regarded Rima for a long, long minute, then gave a nod. It seemed clear that the other alor did not know what had precipitated the attack on the covert on Navarro, and at this point, the Armorer wanted to keep it that way. Bad enough that they knew that what Gideon wanted was a Foundling- and she was sure that Cuan Tadasco knew which Foundling.

It was, she supposed, patently obvious which Foundling.

“Thank you.”

Rima nodded. “We are in the midst of preparing an evening meal, and once it is dark, we will be honoring Arkil Tadasco. I believe his Foundling has also chosen to swear the Creed tonight.”

The Armorer cocked her head. “He had a Foundling?”

“Yes. I gather Cuan didn’t mention that?” ” Rima sighed at the Armorer’s headshake. “That man… yes, Arkil had a Foundling who came of age while they were gone. She intended to swear the Creed when he got back, but… she came to me and asked if she could swear it tonight.” 

“I see.”

“You are welcome to join us. I understand if the meal is… awkward… but I want you and your people to feel welcome here.”

The Armorer nodded. “We will take our meal privately, but join you in honoring him.”

Rima gazed at the Armorer speculatively. “I will have food sent over, then. In a few days we can discuss more details. Training, resources, that sort of thing. For now, please get settled.” 

The Armorer nodded. “Thank you. We still need to see what we were not able to bring with us when we evacuated.” She stood to leave. e

“Oh, and as for your healer…” Rima smiled again, still dangerous. “I will be speaking with her.” 

The Armorer nodded again, and left. Rima watched her go, and then poured two glasses of net’ra gal. She held one up, and Sadet took it from her hand as he lumbered in. 

“What did you think?”

“Paranoid.” He said, taking a drink. “She’s good with the metal. Saw a lot of beskar on her people. Even the one without the…” He gestured at his head. “It was new. Surprised she’d use beskar there.” 

“Is she telling the truth?”

He shrugged. “Seems to be. Maybe not all of it.”

“Hmmmmm.” Rima nodded. “I agree. Well, if nothing else, this will be interesting.” Sadet raised his glass in toast to that.

  
  


Din found Teryn sitting outside at sunset, the Kid trailing behind him. It seemed safe enough to let him walk when he could. She was still turning the mudhorn signet over in her hands. “Have you decided yet?”

She shook her head. “I met some of his aliit. His ba’buir and his vod’ad.”

Din cocked his head at her tone. “How did that go?”

“Not great. She blames me for her buir’s death.” 

“It wasn’t your fault.”

She smiled wryly up at him. “I’ve been at this long enough to know that. It’s just… messy. Very messy.” Din nodded and leaned against the wall, and they watched the Kid wander around picking up sticks. 

“I have a name for him.” 

Teryn looked up and smiled. “It’s about time.” 

She stood up, and Din picked up the Kid. “I already did this, but it seems right to re-do the vow with his name.” She nodded in agreement. The Kid looked at him solemnly- he knew this was important. 

Din took a deep breath. “Ni kyr’tayl gai sa’ad, Jha’iil.” 

Teryn smiled. Jha, for their Buir, and ‘iil, for Kuiiil. It was a good name. “Su cuy’gar, Jha’iil.” 

The Kid- Jha’iil- beamed. Din took Jha’iil’s hand and placed it on his cuirass. “Din Djarin.” 

Teryn took his other hand and placed it on her cuirass. “Teryn Brennen.” 

Jha’iil frowned at them both. “Buir. Ba’vodu.” 

The sun set fast in the valley- once it went behind the hills, it was dark. The two coverts met at a giant firepit before the ruined main temple building, where a large pyre had been constructed. On top of it lay the beskar pieces of Arkil’s armor, and in front, on a stone bier, sat his helmet. 

The Samaki Covert all had their helmets on, except for their youngest children, who had not received one yet. Of the Navarro Covert, the only ones without helmets Jha’iil, and Teryn. Even Ionnas had a tiny helmet. 

Teryn faded into the back of the Navarro contingent. Din tried to get her to stand with him and Jha’iil, but she stood fast this time. This wasn’t really her place. 

Rima and Sadet stood to one side of the pyre, and Cuan, Tuathal, and Atriu stood on the other. Atriu did not have her helmet on, and her eyes were bright, but determined. Determined to not shame her buir and get through this.

“We are here to celebrate the life and death of Arkil Tadasco, of Clan Lytau.” Rima began. “We are also here to witness Atriu Tadasco swear the Creed.” 

There was a rattling as people banged their vambraces on their cuirasses. 

“He follows Traz Tadasco and Ekha Tadasco into the Manda, along with the uncountable dead from the Purge.” Tuathal intoned. “There does he see his buire and his vode. There does he see the line of the Mando’ade back to the beginning. There they do call to him. There does he join them in the Manda, in the army of the dead.” 

Tuathal, Cuan, and Atriu raised their arms and used their flame throwers to light the pyre, as the others raised their voices into the funeral chant- the same one Teryn and H’lava had sung quietly in the secrecy of the ruins of Jelucan, but this time it was a hundred voices raised to the skies. 

“ Motir ca'tra nau tracinya. Gra'tua cuun hett su dralshy'a. Cuun hett su…”

_ Those who stand before us light the night sky in flame. Our vengeance burns brighter still. Burns brighter still… _

Teryn hadn’t heard such a loud funeral chant since before the Purge. After the Purge, there were too many and no time to even count the dead, much less honor them properly. In the Covert, it was dangerous to make too much noise, and then there was after. 

She had recited the remembrance for the dead, but not every morning, as she was supposed to. Sometimes there wasn’t time. Sometimes there wasn’t space to do it in private. Sometimes she just didn’t feel like it, and then felt guilty.

As the fire raged, people shouted out stories about Arkil- battles he had fought in, escapades he’d gotten into. Some were heroic deeds, some were funny, some were embarrassing, some were incredibly mundane. 

Through it all, Atriu stared into the fire, tears occasionally leaking down her face, stoically watching the fire burn. Cuan stood next to her, one hand on her shoulder. He glanced down at Atriu, then over at where the Navarro Covert had gathered, silently watching and bearing witness. He thought he’d heard his Songbird’s voice during the chant, but he wasn’t sure. 

He could see her brother, and his Foundling, who was watching the fire burn with great interest. Cuan had expected Teryn to be with them, as she had been when the Navarro ships had arrived, but she wasn’t. He finally was able to spot her in the back, holding herself apart.

He’d felt torn after Atriu’s outburst, but the kid had been in deep pain, and she needed to get through this night with the support of her family. She knew that there would be a reckoning in the morning, and Teryn understood. He hoped. 

As the fire burned down from its peak, Rima raised her arm for silence, then gestured for Atriu to come forward. Atriu took Arkil’s helmet from the bier. She took a deep breath, and looked at Cuan and Tuathal. They both nodded at her.

She knelt down, facing the rest of her people, and took a deep breath, holding the helmet in front of her. 

“I am Atriu Tadasco, of Clan Lytau. I swear, before the Manda and the Mando’ade, to uphold the Resol’nare. I swear to educate the children of my Tribe and people. I swear to wear the armor of the Mando’ade. I swear to defend myself and my family. I swear to raise my children as Mando’ade. I swear to speak our language. I swear myself and my hand to the Mand’alor. This I swear this by word and mouth, by thought and deed, and by iron and blood.” 

She took a deep breath, and put the helmet on- her buir’s helmet. It was far too big- Arkil had been a large man, and she was not. But Sadet could resize it for her. She wanted to use this helmet for the ceremony. It was the last thing he could give her. 

“We hear your words, and know them to be true,” said Rima. “Rise, Verd. Rise and join your tribe.” 

Atriu took a shaky breath, and stood. She went back to where Cuan and Tuathal waited, while everyone, even the Navarro Covert, cheered. “Oya Manda!” Cuan patted her on the shoulder, while her great-grandfather affectionately tapped her on the helmet. This was the third generation he’d been able to see take the Creed. A long life, and a fruitful one, as these things went.

This was truly a moment of joy and sorrow. 

Teryn stared into the fire, awash in mixed emotions. Seeing someone take the Creed for the first time since she’d been taken out of it was exquisitely painful. 

She’d broken with the Resol'nare, that was just a fact. Her helmet was gone. No, she hadn’t worn her armor. No, she hadn’t had children to raise as Mando’ade. (She’d made a choice at one point- not being able to raise them as Mandalorians made her not want any.) She’d mostly been speaking Basic. She could hardly work to defend her family and Tribe while she wasn’t a part of them. 

She’d obeyed the command of the Creed though. She’d gone and not come back until…. 

Until they’d needed her. 

Except.  _ Except.  _

She had kept her armor, and made sure it was in as good a condition as she was able to. She wore it, once her alor had given her permission. She’d made sure not to lose her fluency in Mando’a, especially in the songs. Once Din had come to collect her, she’d helped him in teaching Jha’iil. Sure, swear words, mostly, but other things, too. And what had coming back been other than helping her family and Tribe?

What had refusing to give their location or any other information under torture been other than defending her people? 

It didn’t matter. All of that didn’t matter. Her helmet had been taken, and that was the end of that. 

Wasn’t it? 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made a Spotify playlist (Dar'Buy'ce) of all the songs T sings and where the chapter titles are coming from.
> 
> https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5R2q3yZ0YAfiYpy7wEDpMw
> 
> Yes, I swiped the Viking Prayer for the Dead for the funeral, but Michael Crichton made it up, anyway, so I don't feel too bad about it. http://www.crawfordsworld.com/jaimie/engIIIap/13thWarrior/Viking_answerlady.htm
> 
> Resol’nare: The six pillars of Mandalorian life. https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Resol%27nare
> 
> Mando'a translations 
> 
> buir: Parent  
> ba’buir: Grandparent  
> Bu’ad: Grandchild  
> veriduur: Courtesan, but Atriu means whore  
> vod: brother/comrade  
> alor: chief  
> al’baar’ur: Doctor (I made this up)  
> Mando’ade: Sons and daughters of Mandalore  
> dar’manda: a state of not being Mandalorian - not an outsider, but one who has lost his heritage, and so his identity and his soul - regarded with absolute dread by most traditionall-minded Mando'ade  
> net’ra gal: black ale - sweet, almost spicy black beer similar to milk stout  
> aliit: Family, clan  
> vod’ad: Sibling's child  
> Ni kyr’tayl gai sa’ad: adoption vow - lit. I know your name as my child.  
> Su cuy’gar: Hello - lit. *You're still alive.*  
> Ba’vodu: Parent's sibling  
> Manda: the collective soul or heaven - the state of being Mandalorian in mind, body and spirit - also supreme, overarching, guardian-like  
> Verd: Soldier  
> Oya Manda: Expression of Mandalorian solidarity and perpetuity: emotional and assertive.


	3. Let that lonely feeling wash away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “How are you finding it?” she asked the cat. Atin purred.
> 
> “How are you finding it?” Cuan asked, coming behind her. She turned and gave him a tired smile. 
> 
> “Hard to say. Early yet.” 
> 
> Three conversations with three people gives Teryn an idea of where she stands.

As the fire burned to ashes, people began to scatter. Most of the Navarro people went to their quarters, Atriu went off with her friends. The Samaki armorer took Arkil’s armor back to their forge. Other people drifted off in groups. Teryn stayed off in the shadows. Once the crowd dispersed, Atin had appeared and taken his favorite position, draped across both shoulders, and she absently scratched his jaw. 

“How are you finding it?” she asked the cat. Atin purred.

“How are _you_ finding it?” Cuan asked, coming behind her. She turned and gave him a tired smile. 

“Hard to say. Early yet.” 

He ducked his head. “I’m sorry about Atriu.”

“I’m going to guess you hadn’t mentioned…” she waved a hand to imply _all of this._

“No.” He scuffed a toe. “I should have. For both of you.” 

“Well, a lot happened.” She shrugged, and Atin hopped off her shoulders, twining around her ankles before running off. Cuan ran his fingers through her hair, once her guardian had left. 

“Still. I’m sorry.”

She nodded, and raised an eyebrow. “Gar cyare?” 

He sighed, rolling his eyes. “You know how bu’buire can be. Embarrassing.”

“Mmmmhmmm.” 

He smiled as she tried to stifle a yawn. “Come to bed?”

“To bed? Or to sleep? Because I am wiped.” She smiled, tiredly leaning into him. “And I think I’ve technically had more sleep than you have.” 

“That is true. But your confirmed kill count over the past two days is a lot higher than mine.” He yawned as well. “But. Sleep. I mean sleep.” He tugged at her arm gently and they went towards his quarters, ignoring the various sets of eyes that watched. There was time enough in the morning to deal with introductions and questions. 

They’d nearly dropped off to sleep before he murmured, “Can I ask you something?”

“Hm?”

“Did you know…. When you jumped, did you know we were there?”

She didn’t answer for such a long time, he thought maybe she’d fallen asleep, when she shook her head. “No.” He let out a long breath, and she rolled over to face him. “I promised him… them both, really... that I wouldn’t let Gideon use me to get to them, one way or another.” She snuggled into his chest and let her eyes drift closed. 

“I’m glad you were there. Even though it was stupid.” 

He nuzzled the top of her head. “No, it wasn’t.” 

  
  


Late in the morning, after a broken night of sleep, she woke up to a fresh mug of caff waiting, and a note saying that alor wanted to see her when she was up. Clearly as an afterthought, Cuan had specified it was his alor that wanted to see her, not hers. 

She got up, got her armor on, and worked her hair into some semblance of tidiness- just like Cuan wouldn’t meet her chief lying on his ass, she didn’t want to meet his looking like she’d just rolled out of a womp rat’s nest. It just would not do. Also any interrogation wouldn’t be fair to anyone if she wasn’t sufficiently awake for it. That was just asking for a fight that no one really needed. 

Din was right, she was a real shabuir in the morning. 

Once she’d finished the caff, and once she worked herself up to being able to even think about outside, she stepped out. 

The valley was beautiful- the day before had been too full and she’d been too keyed up to really appreciate it. The main temple building was across the river from the rest of the complex, and while there had clearly been a bridge, it had been blasted to pieces. The rest of buildings rang around, in between large trees and gigantic boulders, giving plenty of privacy and, she nodded to herself, plenty of places for Foundlings to climb on. The Navarro kids were all huddled in a group near their building- not a surprise- but she could see a bunch of other kids, some with helmets, some without, climbing on a fall of boulders and shouting at each other. 

She gave it another couple of days before the kids started to really mingle. Then the fun would begin. The odds of the fun including some broken bones were 100%. 

The truth was, she was still pretty keyed up. There were nearly 100 people here, Cuan had said. Which meant reliving the whole sorry business a whole bunch more times. At least with meeting with the alor first, she’d have some sense of where she stood. 

It was clear, already, that Cuan _belonged_ here- he wouldn’t want to leave his family, his Tribe. His grandfather already seemed to like her, but he didn’t _know_ . At least, Teryn amended, she didn’t _think_ he knew that his grandson had brought home a soulless mess, but it was hard to tell. 

In the Forge, their Armorer was working, but he looked up when she entered. He had a helmet on, which made sense, given the sparks and molten metal involved, but he stopped working and stared at her for a long time. 

Well. She stared back, not giving an inch or a flinch. He came forward, looking her armor up and down, and reached out to touch one of her pauldrons. She shifted slightly, just enough to void her shoulder away. _Don’t touch me._ His gaze turned back to her, and after another long minute, he twitched his head off to the side. “In there.” 

Teryn narrowed her eyes slightly, then glanced in the direction he indicated, to the door. She looked back at him, inclined her head in a very slight nod, and went to it. Before she knocked, a voice called out “come in!” and she could smell freshly brewed behot. 

Inside Teryn paused in the door, and did a quick sweep of the room. Table, chairs, heating unit. Weapons on the wall. Holonet unit. No other door, but a window to the back of the building. The alor sat, wearing armor in the same dark red that Cuan wore, unhelmeted, and smiled at her. 

“Come in.” Teryn eyed her suspiciously, but entered, and sat down at the chair Rima waved at. “Behot?”

“Thank you.”

They regarded each other for a minute, before Rima broke the silence. “Cuan told me a bit about you, but I wanted to talk with you myself.” Teryn nodded, still wary. “I am Rima Mairn, of Clan Lytau. Cuan did not give me your name, I understand that your Tribe is rather… protective of them” 

Teryn eyed her narrowly, but didn’t answer. Rima sighed a bit. “He said you’re a healer?” 

“Doctor. Al’baar’ur.” 

“I see. I can introduce you to our medics later, if you like.” 

Teryn nodded slightly. Rima had put her in a seat that it would be easy to bolt from- it had been clear in her observations during the ceremonies the night before that this woman was feeling incredibly ill-at-ease, and Rima did not want her to feel trapped. She could also see that Teryn had noticed the effort, and was still extremely guarded.

“He told me, a little bit, about… what happened to you. Your alor said a bit more.”

Teryn nodded, very slightly. 

“I want you to know that you are welcome here. Cuan vouches for you, and whatever happened between you and your people…. I can only begin to imagine.” Rima saw Teryn’s shoulders relax just a bit. Rima’s curiosity about exactly what the circumstances were that led to Teryn’s excommunication was killing her, but this was not the time to ask about it. Cuan had been protective; the other alor had been circumspect. She wanted to know what Teryn’s truth was. Cuan’s tone when he said she didn’t need to worry about the hut’uun told her that he was dead. It could wait.

“Your alor said that it was in everyone’s best interests that you are protected from Gideon. Can you…. Would you please explain that?” 

Teryn sat back and continued to look warily at Rima, considering. She took a drink of the behot- it was very good. “Do you grow this here?”

Rima narrowed her eyes slightly. “Yes.” 

Teryn nodded, taking another sip. “He’s told you that we have what Gideon is looking for.” 

“Yes. He told me it’s a Foundling.” Teryn stiffened, and her eyes flicked to the door. “I already told your alor that we will of course protect this Foundling. You don’t need to fear on that account.” 

Teryn nodded, but didn’t relax. “The Foundling is my vod’ad. If Gideon found me, he would use me to try to force my ori’vod to… He’s already tried.” 

Rima frowned. “He told me that Gideon captured one of you....”

Teryn nodded. “I was.” 

“How did that happen?”

“Stupidity. An accident of fate. Both.” 

“So you’ve seen the Darksaber.”

“Yes. And I saw him use it.” Teryn bit her lip. “If… when… When. When you go after him, do not let him capture anyone alive. He…” She swallowed, and stared down at the mug. “He removes helmets and…. Don’t let him.” 

Rima sat back. “Oh fuck.” Teryn glanced up quickly, and Rima could see the haunted shadows that she had been hiding, before looking back down. “I’ll want to know more, but not right now. I imagine it’s still fresh.” 

Teryn nodded, still looking down. “I…” 

“Go on.” 

Teryn looked up, aggressively, almost challenging. “He told you that… about… that my helmet was removed. That’s obvious. Did he tell you that it was over ten years ago? That I’ve been dar’manda for ten years?” 

“Yes.”

Teryn narrowed her eyes. “And you don’t mind.”

“Mind what?"

“That I’ve been outside the Creed for that long.” 

“No. Your entire Tribe is welcome here. That includes you.” Teryn swallowed, hard, and Rima cursed any interpretation of the Creed that would result in this mixture of fear and anger. “Cuan said that you were the main heal- sorry, al’baar’ur for your Tribe, correct?”

Teryn nodded. 

“Later today, I’ll show you to our medical facilities, and you and they can figure out how you can work together. Our healer is… well…” Rima paused, thinking of how to word it diplomatically. “Roccan is very experienced, as he will tell you. At great length.” 

Teryn eyed her, a small smile toying at the edges of her mouth. “I see.”

“Oh, you will. At great length.” Rima jerked her head towards the door. “I suspect Cuan is waiting for you out there. Come back around midday, and I’ll introduce you to Roccan.”

Teryn nodded. “Thank you.”

Rima waved her hand dismissively. “Go.” Teryn left, and Rima realized that she still didn’t know what the woman’s name was. Protective of their names, indeed. 

Out in the Forge, Cuan wasn’t waiting, but his grandfather was. He’d been chatting with Sadet, who had clearly been working on Atriu’s helmet. Tuathal was holding the helmet, feeling it with his fingers, and tapping on it. Sadet was nodding along, and Tuathal raised his head and looked in the direction of the door. 

“Ah, ad’ika. I was expecting to find you here.” Teryn frowned, and he handed the helmet back to Sadet, and stood up. “Walk with me.” He smiled, but there was a layer of command in there. She hesitated. “Walk with me,” he repeated, more gently, “please.” 

She glanced at Sadet, who was watching this interaction with what was probably a smile, and he shrugged and went back to the Forge. She looked back at Tuathal, who held out his arm, pointedly. She sighed, and went over and took his arm. He patted her hand, and they left the building, and he steered her towards where some warriors were training. 

“How is Rima this morning?”

Teryn glanced over at him, but he was facing straight forward. “Fine… I think.” 

“And how are you? Did you sleep well?” 

“Yes.” That wasn’t true. 

“Mmmm. Perhaps not as well as all that. But better than not sleeping, I should think.” He patted her hand again. “I know my bu’ad apologized for Atriu’s outburst. I wanted to as well.” 

“She was angry.” 

“Yes, but still. She’s been, perhaps, a bit spoiled- hard not to, when it’s rare to live to see a second generation, much less a third- but she’d a good verd, at heart. She’s…”

“Young. And had been blindsided.” Teryn smiled slightly. “Not my first time dealing with someone like that. Won’t be my last, I’m sure.” 

“I’m sure.” They walked around the perimeter of the training area, and circled around, and Teryn started getting the feeling she was being _paraded_. He patted her hand again. “If you’re seen with me, it will help make it clear that you’re to be accepted.” 

She stopped and looked at him, wary and worried. “So he told you.”

“He told me some.” Tuathal sighed. “He told me why you don’t wear a helmet.” He grimaced. “I believe that Atriu has also made some assumptions and has been rather vocal with them.” 

Teryn snorted quietly. “That’s hardly a surprise.” 

“I may no longer be alor here, but my opinion carries some weight.” He grinned conspiratorially. “I can’t see, but I still understand how optics works.”

“So...you don’t mind…?”

“No, ad’ika. No. You make him happy. He’s been… I know this will sound odd, but he’s been looking.” He cocked his head. “You… oh, ad’ika. No, no, I did not mean to make you cry.” 

Teryn let go of his arm and turned away from him and everyone else. She covered her face with her hands, trying to take deep, steadying breaths. 

“Let's get you back to your own quarters, hm?” He took her hand again and put it on his arm and he pulled them both towards the Navarro Covert’s building. “My bu’ad called you LaarSenaar, did I hear that right?” At her nod he smiled. “You will have to sing for me sometime. It’s been a while since I’ve heard any new songs.”

She nodded, still sniffling. 

“We found this place about seven years ago- it had been abandoned for quite some time. The fact that the valley is protected was something we were able to use to our advantage.”

“Do you know what kind of temple it was?”

“We have left the main temple building alone. It seemed… disrespectful. I suspect some of the ade have made some incursions, because that’s what ade do.” 

Teryn smiled. “Apparently ours had a ritual where the oldest ones would sneak out at and run along the roofs of Navarro for a night. They’d do this every few months.” 

“Sounds about right.” He chuckled. “Ade the galaxy over are all the same.” 

They had neared the front door of the Navarro building when a voice screeched, “Ba’vodu!” and a small green blur, followed by a large ginger one, charged at Teryn’s leg. Teryn gave a short laugh and scooped up Jha’iil. The kid snuggled into her neck, babbling contentedly, then he paused, and regarded Tuathal with big, serious eyes. Atin twined around her ankles, then settled on one foot, keeping a watchful eye on Jha’iil. 

“Vod’ad, this is…” she paused, feeling deeply uncomfortable even introducing Tuathal by name. 

Tuathal inhaled sharply, and reached a hand out. “Su’cuy gar, verd’ika.” 

Jha’iil blinked, glanced at Teryn, and at her nod, put his claw on one of Tuathal’s fingers. “Suuu’coo.” 

Tuathal stilled, and closed his eyes. “It’s nice to meet you, too, verd’ika.”

Jha’iil babbled contentedly, then turned to the door again. “Buir!” 

Din cautiously approached them, glancing at Teryn, questioning. She nodded, _yes, he’s okay._ Tuathal turned his head towards Din. “This is your buir?”

Jha’iil nodded, then paused, and glanced at Teryn and Din. Tuathal chuckled. “No, I can’t see if you nodded, verd’ika. But I can tell you did.” 

Din glanced at Teryn again and she shrugged. _I told you._ Jha’iil babbled again, and pulled Tuathal’s hand to his head, and the old man carefully felt the kid’s head and face with his fingers. Teryn stiffened slightly, and Din shifted uncomfortably, but Jha’iil closed his eyes and hummed happily. 

“How old is he?”

Teryn and Din exchanged another glance. “We think he’s roughly the equivalent of 2 standard years old… maybe less.” Din said. 

“But in actuality he’s much older?”

“Yes. 51 by now.” 

Tuathal hummed, thinking. “Well, verd’ika, I’m going to guess you’re what all the fuss is about.” he said, stroking Jha’iil’s ears. “We have a few children in the creche at his...level.” Jha’iil trilled again, gesturing at Din. Tuathal looked up towards Din. “I am Tuathal Tadasco.” 

Teryn, without missing a beat, said, “This is my ori’vod, our Tribe’s beroya, and his Foundling.” 

Tuathal smiled to himself, and he extended a hand to Din. He recognized exactly what she had done. After a pause, Din clasped Tuathal’s arm above his wrist. Tuathal tapped the metal of Din’s vambrace and nodded. “Good armor.” 

“Our alor is very good with the beskar.” 

“I can tell.” He brought his hand up towards Din’s cuirass. “May I?” 

Din nodded, then said yes, just as Teryn let out a mildly annoyed huff. Tuathal chuckled. “Ad’ika, I’m used to it.” He skimmed his fingers along Din’s beskar, and smiled. “Very good work, and good beskar. Sadet said you had a great deal of beskar among your people. Even you, ad’ika.” He nodded at Teryn. 

Din made a noncommittal grunt, and took Jha’iil from Teryn. Atin took the opportunity to scramble up to her shoulders, and Tuathal gave a delighted smile. “What’s this?”

“This is Atin, my loth cat.” She took Tuathal’s hand and brought it to Atin’s head, and Atin delightedly accepted the touch, purring loudly. 

“I’ve never touched a live one before.” 

“I had three of them- one was killed by a bounty hunter- he’s dead now, not just because of that, but also because of that- and the other I had to leave behind. He was mostly feral and didn’t need people at all, just the occasional warm spot to curl up in, so… I’m sure he’s fine.” Teryn gave Atin a scratch at the base of his tail. “This one insisted on coming along, and my vod’ad agreed.” 

“They know who their allies are.” Tuathal gave Atin a final pat and turned back towards the main buildings. “You should get some more rest, ad’ika.” He set off, unhesitating in his step. 

Din and Teryn watched him go, and Din glanced at her. “You sure he’s blind?”

“Pretty sure. He’s… he is odd, right?” 

Din nodded. “Yeah. He’s odd. But he likes him-” Din looked down at Jha’iil, “-and the cat does, so… that’s something, right?” Teryn nodded. It was something indeed. 

  
  
Later that afternoon, Rima brought Teryn to the medical bay. It was quiet, and Rima brought her over to a balding man, who looked Teryn up and down. “She’s the healer?” His tone indicated he was not impressed. 

Teryn’s eyebrow raised a fraction. Rima controlled a laugh. “She’s the al’baar’ur, yes.” She inclined her head. “This is Roccan.” She glanced between the two of them, and thought that it was really too bad this couldn’t be in public. By all accounts from Cuan, the al’baar’ur from Navarro knew what she was about, and clearly wasn’t there to put up with any shit.

Roccan, on the other, tried to test people by giving them shit. 

“I’ll leave you two to get acquainted.” She left. 

Teryn and Roccan eyed each other. He sniffed. “You know my name. What’s yours?” 

Teryn cocked her head. “No one else has asked so directly.” 

“Are you going to tell me or not?”

Teryn shook her head. “No. You can call me al’baar’ur, or Doctor, as you like.” 

He snorted. “What’s your training?” 

“Concordia, in the fighting corps medical units. Then I was with the Rebel Alliance medcorps for most of the war.” He snorted again, and she shrugged. “Let’s not pretend you didn't know. You clearly did.” 

“War’s been over for a while. What were you doing after that?” 

“Your directness is somewhat refreshing.” Teryn glanced around the med bay, and wandered over to take a look at the equipment. “Main medical support on a mining planet. Did a little bit of everything. You have a bacta tank.” 

“Yes.”

She huffed. “Haven’t had access to a bacta tank in a while, and even before then…” she shrugged. “Had to get creative.” 

He narrowed his own eyes as she opened drawers and cabinets. “Are you inspecting me?” 

“Yes.” She poked through the instruments in one drawer, frowning to herself. “Is _this_ where you keep the stims?” 

“This is my….” What the fuck was happening?

“I know it’s your med bay. I’m trying to decide if I want to work with you.” She turned and gave him another once over. “How many beds do you have?” 

“Twenty, but we’ve never needed that many.” He scowled. “Your….sect… doesn’t take off their helmets for anyone, did I hear right?”

“No, we don’t.” She turned back to poking around in the cabinets.

“So… how do you deal with head wounds?”

“Medical droids, when we can get them. Haven’t had any for a while. There’s a certain amount people can do on their own. But mostly,” she shrugged. “We have a really good Armorer. Good helmets prevent a lot of injuries.” 

He narrowed his eyes. “What about when you need….” 

“We have methods. There’s always a workaround, if you’re _creative_ enough to find it.” Her voice was dripping with saccharine sweetness that he didn’t buy in the least.

“Do you know how to deal with head wounds now?”

“I was in war zones with the Rebel Alliance for four years.” She smiled again, almost feral. “And miners tend to get rocks falling on their heads a lot. What’s your training?”

This whole interview was not going as he'd expected, and he wasn’t sure exactly when it had gone off the rails. “I… Mandalore.” 

“Hm.” She twitched an eyebrow and he flushed. This was fun. 

“It was the best….”

“I’m sure it was.” In other words, he had traditional medical training, not _throw the trainees into the guts of combat medicine before they know which end of the hypospray was which_. “How long have you been the main doc- sorry. _Healer_ here?” 

“For… I’m supposed to be interrogating you.”

“I know.” She grinned again. “How long?”

“Since just after the Purge.” 

“So you learned a lot on the run, just like a lot of us.” 

“...yes.” He scowled, and tried to get this back on track. “Rima said you had a hibir?” _A student._

“Yes. He’s young, and had only been learning for two years when our old al’baar’ur died.” she picked up a datapad and started flipping through it randomly. Roccan stepped forward and snatched it from her hand. She smirked- exactly what she would have done. 

“So he doesn’t know much yet.” 

“He’s learning.”

Roccan stared at her, and she leaned back, hooking her thumbs into her belt. Politics, people, family- that was all complicated and uncomfortable. This? This battleground was refreshingly easy. Give her a classically trained healer against her mud-and-blood classrooms any day. She knew who’d win. 

He sighed. He did, too. And it wasn't him. “If I may ask?” and her nod he hesitated, then said, “Do you have prenatal experience? We haven’t had much call, but…it’s currently an issue.”

She smiled, a genuine smile. “Yes, I do.” 

He allowed himself a minuscule sigh of relief. He’d been _pretty_ sure he could muddle through, but he’d learned several times over the years that what the textbooks said and what reality said weren’t always the same. “Good.” 

She considered him for a while, and he squirmed. Then she shrugged and nodded. “Okay. I’ll give it a try. My hibir needs to learn from other people, so this is good.” She headed for the door. “I’ll bring the list of what we brought with us tomorrow, and we’ll see what we have.”

“Yes, that sounds great…” Roccan nodded as she left, and frowned to himself. He felt like he’d passed some sort of test, and he hadn’t known he was going to be taking one. Not at all. 

Later that evening, Teryn was in her room, picking at dinner and turning over the various interactions of the day when Cuan came in. As usual when he visited the Navarro Covert, he had his helmet on, but he didn’t even wait for her door to close all the way before he pulled it off. “How was your day, LaarSenaar?”

She gave him a wry smile. “Tiring.” 

“Sorry I couldn’t be with you, but Rima…”

“No, that made sense. I’d want to interrogate me alone, as well.” 

“She’s annoyed she still doesn’t know your name.” 

“You had to wait like, a whole day before I’d tell you.” Teryn grinned, “but she doesn’t have your advantages.” 

He grinned back. “And what were those?”

“Oh, no. Your head would get so swelled up it wouldn’t fit in your bucket. You’ll just have to wonder.” 

He grabbed her hands and tugged. “Come to bed.” 

She raised an eyebrow. “Too early for sleep.” 

“I said what I said, cyar’ika.” 

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made a Spotify playlist (Dar'Buy'ce) of all the songs T sings and where the chapter titles are coming from.
> 
> https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5R2q3yZ0YAfiYpy7wEDpMw
> 
> Mando'a Translations
> 
> Gar cyare: Your beloved  
> bu’buire: Grandparents  
> alor: Chief  
> shabuir: extreme insult - *jerk*, but much stronger  
> behot: herb used in beverages, mildly antiseptic and stimulating  
> Al’baar’ur: Doctor  
> hut’uun: coward (worst possible insult)  
> vod’ad: Brother's child  
> ori’vod: Older brother  
> dar’manda:a state of not being Mandalorian - not an outsider, but one who has lost his heritage, and so his identity and his soul - regarded with absolute dread by most traditionall-minded Mando'ade  
> ad’ika: Little one, child  
> verd: Soldier  
> bu’ad: Grandchild  
> LaarSenaar: Songbird  
> ade: Children  
> Ba’vodu: Father's sibling  
> Su’cuy gar: Hello (lit: You're still alive)  
> verd’ika: private (rank) Can be used affectionately, often to a child; *little soldier* - context is critical.  
> Buir: Father  
> beroya: Bounty hunter  
> hibir: Student  
> Cyar'ika: darling, sweetheart


	4. Just you wait for PhysEd

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was three days of watching the kids of the two Coverts circle each other before the first real skirmish. 
> 
> The children of the two Coverts aren't meshing well.

Rima waited a couple of days for the Navarro people to get settled before going over to see how things were. While they’d all come to the funeral and to see Atriu take the Creed, they hadn’t really mixed with her people, and they’d kept to themselves. The Samaki people had left them alone, as well, partially out of politeness.

Mostly though, it was out of wariness- who were these people? 

Rima wore her helmet over to visit the Navarro Armorer. She’d noticed that Cuan did the same thing (and that man was over there a _lot_. It was hilarious to her to watch him be so smitten with the dar’manda girl) and it seemed like a small thing to do to make their guests feel more comfortable. She’d heard some mutterings about how strange it was that the Navarro people wore their helmets all the time, but she let it go, for now. 

As long as everyone respected each other and their traditions, it would work out. There was nothing to worry about. 

The Armorer was inspecting a building behind their living quarters. Rima wasn’t sure what it had been- it was fairly large, and empty, except for some debris that had drifted in over the years. The Armorer was pacing out distances and murmuring to herself. Rima cleared her throat, and the Armorer looked up. 

“I just wanted to see how you were settling in.” 

“Well, I think. The building is more than adequate, and the kitchen is well-stocked. Thank you.”

“Think nothing of it.” Rima glanced around the empty building. “What were you thinking of using this space for?” 

“I thought the Forge could go in here.” 

Rima raised her eyebrows. A separate Forge implied a desire to keep everything separate. Which… if that what they wanted, fine. But it could get awkward, and there were some shared responsibilities that the Navarro Covert should be willing to help with, regardless. 

“We have sentry duty, mostly at night, people rotate through. If I may have my al’verde and yours discuss adding your warriors to the rotation?”

The Armorer smiled to herself. “Yes, of course.” She had also noticed the reluctance to approach the other Covert, and if there was anything she’d learned in her years of leading her people, it’s that it was much easier to let them come to certain things in their own time, as long as it wasn’t imperative. Joining in on the sentry rotation would force at least some interaction. “I will tell mine that there should be at least one of your people with mine, so as to make sure they understand what the procedures are.”

Rima chuckled, understanding precisely what the Armorer was saying. “Of course. I will tell Ademe the same.” They exchanged glances of perfect understanding. 

“I believe my healer and your al’baar’ur have come to an agreement.” Rima chuckled. “I believe she was the one who came out on top of that skirmish.” 

“That is not a surprise.” The Armorer cocked her head. “Your people are… accepting of her?”

“She has strong allies. That helps.” The Armorer nodded, almost to herself. “...as for the children…”

“Yes.”

“I don’t know if you’ve had a chance to think about training yet…” 

“Not much. This,” and The Armorer gestured to indicate the move, the sky, _everything_ , “has been a large change for them. I wanted to give them all some time to adjust.”

“That’s wise.” Rima headed for the door. “I’m sure they’ll start playing together soon enough.” 

It was three days of watching the kids of the two Coverts circle each other before the first real skirmish. 

They had sorted themselves into three groups. The tiniest ones, of which Jha’iil was the only one from Navarro- didn’t much care. There were toys and blankets and always someone who kept an eye on them. Din had been concerned about how the other young children would take to him, the previous experience with the children of Sorgan notwithstanding. The first time he had (reluctantly) left Jha’iil in the creche with the others, they all regarded him dubiously, but Jha’iil had brought his third-favorite toy with him, and offered to share. So that worked out.

Jha’iil was over the moon to have kids to play with again. The sky and open air didn’t bother him too much- before he’d been found by Din, his life had already been unsettled by everything, and afterward, all he really needed was the stability of knowing that Din would always be there for him, and if Din wasn’t there, then someone else was. He could adapt. 

The oldest ones regarded each other from across the compound. The three from Navarro that were well into training mostly stayed with the adults, but regarded the trees and the sky with suspicion. Paz and Ademe were still in the process of sussing each other out and negotiating training and sentry schedules, and the Foundlings closest to taking the Creed followed their al’verdes’ lead. 

The group in the middle, ranging from about six to ten, were not so circumspect. They understood that a position of strength must be seized quickly. Battle lines must be drawn. 

The first day, the Navarro kids all huddled in a corner of their common room. The adults let them- the flight from Jelucan had been rough on them, especially coming so soon after the flight from Navarro. They were Mandalorians; they bore it all with quiet stoicism, followed directions, and did exactly as they were supposed to do. 

But that didn’t mean it wasn’t scary. They were all Foundlings. Some of them could still remember whatever tragedy that had brought them to the Covert in the first place. Mandalorians were good at handling traumatized children, but this new Covert was a lot for everyone. 

There was just so much sky. 

That first day the adults were busy examining the building and picking out quarters and unloading. The Foundlings that could help all did, and the ones that couldn’t stayed out of the way.

On the second day, the midrange Foundlings crept outside, but remained close to the building. Ionnas, the youngest of that group, had flatly refused to go to the creche, (“I’m not a baby!”) and his buir had reluctantly allowed it. The Foundlings had all agreed, almost without discussion, that they would wear their helmets. “We are Mando’ade. We wear helmets outside.” 

They could see a pack of other children across the compound, shouting and climbing on a boulder pile, and the Navarro Foundlings all exchanged glances. 

They hadn’t been allowed to make a lot of noise while playing. “Our secrecy is our survival, and our survival is our strength” the Armorer had told them, so they played hide-and-seek in the tunnels, which almost always devolved into an almost silent game of tag.

That game of tag invariably ended when it got too loud. Someone would step out and _look_ at them, and without a word given they’d pile into the Forge and watch the Armorer work, tired out, but happy. 

The Armorer didn’t mind- if she had, she would have put a stop to it. But it was important for the Foundlings to see how their armor was made. Their armor was their identity, and learning how the steel was made into what would protect them was as important a part of their education as any other part of the Resol'nare. Plus seeing which Foundlings took the most interest in the Forge was how she’d find an apprentice of her own. 

Sometimes the adults would play too, and there was always a moment when a Foundling would realize that it wasn’t just a game- it was training for the inevitable attack that would come. The Foundlings needed to know how to hide, how to not be found. 

When the attack came, they hid, just as they’d been taught, just as they’d practiced, and then they ran, once the attackers had been led away. Because they’d trained well and often, every Foundling from Navarro had survived. 

They hadn’t played hide and seek on Jelucan. 

On Samaki, there were no tunnels, there wasn’t a Forge of their own yet. There were trees and rocks and a river, and it was a lot to take in. 

The Samaki children, on the other hand, grew up in a protected place, where there was always a herd of them, and their buire watched them with what seemed to be benevolent neglect. They were ushered outside and ran around whenever they didn’t have lessons, and for the most part, were expected to come back for mealtimes. 

They had been told the main temple building on the other side of the river was off limits, but there were rules and there were guidelines and there was “If you break a rule and don’t get caught, has the rule really been broken at all?” The main entrance to the temple had been sealed in some sort of explosion, and so far, no one had found an entrance that could be opened, but that didn’t stop them from trying. 

They were all pretty sure the old alor knew what they were up to, but he seemed content to keep their secrets.

Their alor, Rima, had gathered all the kids and told them that new people were coming, and that they had lived a very different life, so they were to be considerate and to share. When questioned, she admitted she didn’t know many details about how many Foundlings might be with them, or how old they were, or, after one shy seven year old asked, what toys they might already have. 

In short, the Samaki Herd agreed, alor didn’t know anything _important_. 

So when Navarro Foundlings were spotted clumped uncertainly around their building, the fifteen Samaki kids who did not have any training that morning swarmed out of their mess hall after breakfast and began climbing on a boulder fall where they could observe the Navarro Foundlings. Some of them were wearing helmets, but most weren’t. 

“Why are they all wearing helmets?” 

“Alor said they had different customs.” 

“Why aren’t they playing? Don’t they want to play with us?”

There was a collective shrug, and the Samaki herd continued to swarm over the boulders. While it appeared that no one was watching them, an astute observer would notice that there was always at least one adult outside. An astute observer would also notice that the older kids would help the younger ones climb, and keep an eye on them. 

It was an exercise in teamwork. 

The Navarro Foundlings huddled together for a while, watching the Samaki Herd. They were so _loud._ They, too, had questioned their alor on what they might find, and had similarly not been impressed with the available information. Even the Visitor hadn’t been forthcoming with the important details, which was a disappointment all around. Didn’t the adults understand what they really needed to know?

So the Foundlings and the Herd eyed each other suspiciously for the entire day. 

The next day, the Navarro Foundlings were ushered outside again- the Armorer and their buire had decided that the best way to get them used to not being underground was to just to send them out. 

The Samaki Herd had been waiting for them. Sure, sometimes new Foundlings need some time before they were really ready to play, but these new kids weren’t new Foundlings. They were supposedly Mando’ade. Fothu, a sturdy ten year old, had been designated as the ambassador for this purpose, and he marched over to where the Navarro Foundlings were clumped. The rest of the Herd waited back by the boulders they had been climbing on the day before to see how this turned out. 

“Why are you all wearing helmets?” 

The Navarro Foundlings all regarded him solemnly, and he managed to resist the urge to squirm uncomfortably. It was an eerie feeling to have a bunch of helmets regard you without movement or expression. Finally, one of them said, “This is the Way.” 

Fothu narrowed his eyes. “okay.” He settled back on his heels and folded his arms. “You wanna come play?” 

The Navarro Foundlings looked at him solemnly, then as one, looked over his shoulder to the rest of the Herd. They turned to confer, quietly, before they finally turned back. “Okay.” They quietly followed Fothu back to the boulder fall, and they ranged in ragged formation, with little Ionnas in the middle. _Put the strongest at your perimeter._ The Samaki Herd stared at them, and the few Samaki kids that were wearing helmets quietly took theirs off. 

The Navarro Foundlings all took a breath. Fothu jerked his head at the boulder. “We climb on those.” 

After another minute, the Samaki Herd all collectively shrugged and started climbing. The Navarro Foundlings all observed- where the handholds were, where the paths were, and then started climbing, too. 

Across the compound, watchful adults nodded. This was going fine. 

On the boulders it was actually going…just okay. The Samaki Herd kept trying to get names out of the Navarro Foundlings, but were getting nowhere. The Navarro Foundlings kept trying to use as few words as possible to get information. They might have been more successful, if part of their attention hadn’t been taken up by the darkening sky.

It rained on Navarro. Even if the Foundlings were allowed outside, they wouldn't have been when it rained. The rain would mix with the sulfur from the lava fields and create acid rain. No one stayed outside then, and they had to stay away from where the storm drains would pour into the sewers. Rain was potentially deadly. 

So when the first drops began to fall, the Navarro Foundlings all shrieked in terror and clambered down the boulders to run to their building. The Samaki Herd followed, in confusion. 

“What’s wrong?”

“It’s raining!”

Fothu glanced back at his comrades, and they all shrugged. “So?”

The Navarro Foundlings scowled as one. This di’kut couldn’t possibly be that stupid. “Rain is bad, you utreekov!”

One of the Samaki girls scoffed. “Are your brain cells lonely? What kind of Mandos think rain is bad?” 

“At least we’re real Mandos. You’re just a bunch of dar’mandas.” scowled a Navarro Foundling. 

Fothu gasped. “You take that back!” 

“I will NOT.” 

Fothu charged at the Navarro Foundlings with the rest of his comrades right behind him. The Navarro Foundlings took defensive stances, and the oldest of that group shoved tiny Ionnas towards the door. “Go get the al’verde’s ad!” Ionnas gulped and nodded, and put his head down and ran as fast as his little legs could carry him. Faris would help them. 

The sound of fighting children wasn’t an entirely uncommon sound in a Covert, though the Navarro Foundlings had learned how to settle their differences silently. The Samaki Herd charged in like shriekhawks, and it was clear within seconds that this was not a squabble that would sort itself out in a few minutes. No, this was a melee that would only end once blood was spilled, and possibly not even then. 

Ionnas found Faris with his buir, Paz. “Al’verde! Al’verde, they’re fighting…!” he gestured towards the main entranced and Paz could hear the sound of battle. He ran out, followed by Ordo and a few others, including Din. The melee was uneven- there were twice as many kids from the Samaki Covert as there were from Navarro, but Paz noted with some detached pride that there were a few Samaki kids that were already out of the fight, one clutching his arm, and another bent over and wheezing. 

Paz waded in and began separating kids, and was mildly surprised when one of the Samaki kids tried to bite his hand. Din looked around quickly to make sure that Jha’iil had not escaped from the creche, and was relieved to see he wasn’t involved in this mess. Other adults from the Samaki covert ran over to help manage the fracas, pulling kids out indiscriminately and hollering for them to stop. 

It finally ended when one of the Navarro Foundlings got her hand on a rock and whipped it at Fothu’s head, and he went down. 

Everyone froze, and all the children backed away slowly. Paz groaned, and then groaned again when he saw the Samaki al’verde walking toward them. This wasn’t going well at all. He knelt down next to Fothu, and was relieved to see that he was still breathing, and whimpering a little. He picked him up and snapped at the entire pack of children, “If you are not injured, go inside. If you are injured, come with me to the med bay.” 

Without question, the Navarro Foundlings quietly did as ordered, as did a few of the Samaki Herd, but most of them looked at him mutinously. This wasn’t their al’verde. Surely they didn’t have to listen to him, right? 

“You heard the al’verde!” shouted Ademe. “Move!” The Samaki Herd scattered, with a few of them starting to trudge towards the med bay. Ademe sighed, and glanced at Paz. “We will discuss this later.”

Paz sighed, too.

As it was, with the exception of Fothu’s head injury, the casualty count wasn’t terrible. Sure, a broken arm, and an injured wrist (Paz made mental note that they needed to review wrist and hand positions while punching- that wrist should not have been injured), and at least two kids with the wind knocked out of them. He was going to have the buire of the remaining Navarro Foundlings check them over to make sure they weren’t hiding injuries. It was a bad habit to get into when you were home. 

_Home_. Was it yet? Hard to say. 

Paz sighed again, and opened the door to the med bay. Teryn glanced up, looked at the kid in his arms, and he watched her realize that it wasn’t one of the Navarro Foundlings, that the kid was bleeding from a head wound, and that there were a few other injured kids trailing behind him. 

“Ah. I had credits on this not happening until this afternoon.” 

Paz huffed back a laugh. She bellowed for Tabor, and got to work. The head wound, fortunately, wasn’t bad. It was messy, and Fortu had a concussion, but nothing a little bacta nasal spray couldn’t fix. Roccan was very interested in it. Teryn still wanted Fothu to stay for observation. The Navarro kid with the wrist flatly refused to let Roccan treat her, and waited for Teryn or Tabor to be available. Teryn and Roccan exchanged looks, but decided to let it be for the moment- there was time to get this sorted out after this blow up had been settled. They also agreed, with minimal discussion, that with the exception of any concussions, they wouldn’t use bacta on anyone. The kids all needed to learn the consequences of their actions, and letting a broken arm or sprained wrist heal naturally wouldn’t harm them. 

Once the various kids had been patched up and sent back to their buire, Rima and the Armorer set out to determine exactly what happened. They met in Rima’s office, where they both just looked at each other and sighed heavily. 

“My Foundlings say yours made fun of them for not playing correctly, and called them idiots for being concerned about rain.”

“My pack says yours refused to play and called them dar’manda.” 

They sighed again. “My guess,” the Armorer said, “Is that the truth is somewhere in between.” 

Rima nodded. She’d hoped they’d have a little more of a grace period to figure the integration of the children out. “Your al’baar’ur says that Fothu will be just fine.” 

The Armorer nodded. “That’s good.” 

The girl who had thrown the rock defended herself by saying, “Well, he wouldn’t have gotten hurt if he’d been wearing a _helmet_ , alor.” and the Armorer been very happy that she was wearing her own helmet to hide the array of reactions she had- amusement as the utter sass of the child, dismay, exasperation, and the tiniest bit of pride.

But this whole situation was already out of hand. “My Foundlings know that I am speaking to you know, and they know that there will be consequences for this action.” 

“As do mine.” Rima nodded. “I feel that we should begin to integrate them immediately, if we want to avoid more full blown battles like this in the future. I knew this wouldn’t be easy, but I had hoped it would be less…”

“Indeed.” 

“Do you have an al’verde bajur?” 

“Yes. Shall I have her bring them over tomorrow? All of our foundlings? The older ones were not involved.”

“I think all of them- your little green one seems to have integrated into the creche just fine, but anyone not in the creche should come tomorrow. The older ones do have more access to blasters, after all.” Rima said wryly. 

The Armorer hummed in agreement. “Thank you.” 

Rima smiled, and held out an unopened bottle of tihaar. “Made here. Thought you could probably use it after the past….” she gestured widely. “Ever.” 

The Armorer inclined her head graciously. “Thank you.” Rima was not wrong. 

Teryn and Cuan were about to engage in what was going to become a nightly dance of “where are we sleeping tonight” when the Armorer sent Faris with a message. One of the Foundlings had started complaining of unspecified pain. In Teryn’s experience, that meant “of a somewhat embarrassing nature, and I don’t want to talk about it.” 

She grinned ruefully at Cuan. “Still on the clock.” 

Faris looked at Cuan, shifted uncomfortably, and looked away- it was the first time he’d seen the man without his helmet, and it was _so weird_. It was one thing to know that the Samaki people went without helmets a lot when they were in their Covert, it was another to actually see it at close quarters. He was used to Teryn- he’d never seen her with a helmet. Cuan was something new altogether, and he felt like he was witnessing something intimate.

Cuan glanced at Faris, and said, “She’ll be along in a minute.” He jerked his head in a dismissal, and Faris took off at a run. “I think I scared him.”

“Yes, with your ugly face.” She grinned and patted his cheek.”It’s going to take some getting used to for them.” She laughed slightly. “Me, too, if we’re being honest.” 

Cuan laughed, and stroked her hair. “Has it been bad?”

She shrugged. “No, just weird.” she looked down, and admitted. “It’s been… nice.. To not be the only one.” 

He smiled. “I hoped that would be the case.” He gave her a gentle shove towards the door. “Go.” She grabbed her bag and left. 

At the Navarro building, one of the Foundlings was in his room, sitting very un. Teryn frowned and started her exam. 

“Were you involved in the fight?” He nodded. “Did you get hit?” 

“In the back.” He lifted up his shirt and nodded approvingly at the bruises just over one kidney. Whoever did that hit like a tank, and none of them were over ten. “Let me guess. It hurt when you had to use the ‘fresher?” 

“Well…. It didn’t hurt, exactly but…” He squirmed and she nodded. 

“But there was blood?” 

He nodded. 

“Well, I think you just have a bruised kidney, which should clear up in a couple days. Do you remember who hit you?”

“No, just that it was one of those dar’manda kids,” he scowled. 

Teryn narrowed her eyes. “Dar’manda?” she looked up at the kid’s buir, who sighed. 

“They don’t wear helmets.” He looked up, angry and murderous. “Like you.” 

She inhaled sharply, and stood up. “If he’s still seeing blood in two days, call me,” she said to the kid’s buir, and left. Fuck if she was sleeping in this goddamn building tonight.

“He didn’t mean that, he’s just stressed…” the kid’s buir followed her out. 

“Yeah, I know. But I’m also getting very tired of stressed out, angry kids taking it out on me.” Teryn raised an eyebrow. “And he got that from somewhere.” She strode out into the night, furious. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made a Spotify playlist (Dar'Buy'ce) of all the songs T sings and where the chapter titles are coming from.
> 
> https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5R2q3yZ0YAfiYpy7wEDpMw
> 
> Mando'a Translations
> 
> dar’manda:a state of not being Mandalorian - not an outsider, but one who has lost his heritage, and so his identity and his soul - regarded with absolute dread by most traditionall-minded Mando'ade  
> al’verde: Commander  
> al’baar’ur: Doctor  
> buir: Parent (plural buire)  
> Mando’ade: Sons and daughters of Mandalore  
> alor: Chief  
> di’kut: idiot, useless individual, waste of space (lit. someone who forgets to put their pants on)  
> utreekov: fool, idiot (lit. emptyhead)  
> ad: Child  
> al’verde bajur: Commander of educating children.  
> tihaar: alcoholic drink - strong clear spirit made from fruit, like eau de vie


	5. Red is my heart, wounded and forelorn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I don’t think this is gonna work, ori’vod.” 
> 
> “If what is going to work?”
> 
> “This!” she gestured back towards the compound. “All of this! It’s day fucking three and the Foundlings are already trying to kill each other, no one else is talking to anyone and…” 
> 
> This is a very stressful time.

Teryn stalked out in the compound. She glanced towards where Cuan’s quarters were, and with an annoyed sigh, headed for the edge of the river. She paced downstream until she got out of sight of anyone, and considered shooting her blaster at one of the trees. 

It would have brought everyone running, and everyone was on edge enough as it was. Plus, more practically, it wouldn’t give her the release she was really looking for. After considering the defenseless tree for a minute, she pulled out the vibroblades she had in each boot and started to attack the tree like a practice dummy. Chucks of bark and wood flew as she dodged and ducked and wove over, around, and under branches. 

Every stress she’d been forced to endure over the past several weeks went into the tree. The looks of pity. The stares. The razing of Panoog. Andrys’ betrayal and then murder. The worry about how this new place and these new people would react to her and to her Tribe. Just. So much. And this one little shit with two words was just the final crack that shattered the very delicate control she’d had. 

Eventually, the tree groaned in defeat, and it fell at the point she’d attacked the most. She danced back and looked at it, breathing heavily, but at least _some_ of her rage was now in the tree. 

“What did it say?” 

She whipped around, blades up in a defensive position, even as she recognized the voice as Din’s. He stopped, hands up, ready to use his jetpack to get away if she decided to go after him. She stepped back, flipped the blades down and put them back in their sheaths. 

“I don’t think this is gonna work, ori’vod.” 

“If what is going to work?”

“This!” she gestured back towards the compound. “All of this! It’s day fucking three and the Foundlings are already trying to kill each other, no one else is talking to anyone and…” 

“Vod’ika.”

“It’s not going to work!” 

“Vod’ika, you said it. It’s day three. Everyone is exhausted and on edge. It’s going to take time”

“Our Foundlings called the kids that live here Dar’manda.” 

Din sighed, heavily. 

“See? They’re never…”

“They will.” He stepped forward, keeping a wary eye in case she decided to go for her blades again. Or blaster. Or just decided to throttle him. “He's is settling in.” 

She kept her hands down, arms relaxed. “Of course he is. He’ll settle anywhere you are.” 

“He did okay with just you.” 

She gave a half smile. “Only because he knew you were coming back. He made that very clear.” 

“Come back, get some food. Try to sleep.” She gave him a narrow look, and he shrugged. “I’m guessing you haven’t been, much.” It had only been a handful of days since Gideon, and the circles under her eyes had been getting deeper.

She shook her head. “Not, really, no.” She sighed, and followed him back towards the compound. They were met long before they were even really near any buildings by Jha’iil, and Din sighed again. “You were supposed to be in bed.” 

Jha’iil tilted his head up at Din, trying to look both concerned and completely innocent, but mostly came off as unrepentant. Teryn frowned down at him. “We don’t know what’s out here at night. It’s not safe.” 

Jha’iil gave her a withering look, and pointed behind him. Sure enough, Atin was watching from a short distance, on alert. Teryn and Din both gave identical sighs, and Din leaned down to pick the kid up, and Jha’iil shook his head and reached for Teryn. “No. Ba’vodu.” 

She picked him up, and he snuggled into her shoulder, holding on to her hair for balance. He made soft contented sounds, and she smiled a little. “I can’t help but wonder if the armor is really that comfortable like this.”

Din shrugged. “He doesn’t seem to mind.” 

They went back, Atin trailing after, still watchful. Teryn glanced towards the main part of the compound, where she could see Cuan looking for her. He walked over to intercept them, and she glanced over at Din. His body language was much less hostile then it had been- still guarded, of course, but he didn’t look like he was going to draw down at any given second. 

She’d take it. 

She saw Cuan pause about twenty feet away, and she realized he did not have his helmet on, or even with him, and she heard Din inhale as he made the same realization. She glanced between them, and started to hand Jha’iil over to Din so they could go, and Din took another deep breath. “No, it’s fine.” 

She raised an eyebrow. _Are you sure?_ He gave a nod. “Need to start somewhere.” 

Cuan waited, in the shadows, and she beckoned him over. “It’s fine.”

“Are you sure?”

She nodded, but kept an eye on Din as Cuan apprached. Din set his shoulders, and looked on the other man’s face for the first time. Cuan’s entire posture was exaggeratedly relaxed, and Teryn realized he was almost as anxious as Din. 

That was actually… promising. In its way. 

“I…. we…” Din started, then stopped. Jha’iil made a curious trill, and peered at Cuan. He looked at Cuan, doubtfully, then at Teryn, and at Din, and at Cuan again. Teryn smiled. “Yes, that’s him. You’ve met him.” 

Jha’iil peered at Cuan, and shook his head dubiously. Teryn grinned at Din. “Did he do this the first time he saw you without yours?” 

Din was trying to stifle his own laughter. “No, but he saw me take it off. He did demand that I put it back on and take it off several times, though.”

They all laughed, and Jha’iil reached for Din, still looking at Cuan suspiciously. Din took him, and Teryn glanced at Cuan. Cuan fingered the ends of her hair. “Are you okay?’

“I killed a tree.”

“....you what?” 

“We’re just going to pretend it said something mean about my buir and leave it at that.”

“Okay…” Cuan glanced at Din, who sighed. 

“I don’t know what the tree could have said.” Din glanced down at Jha’iil, who was beginning to blink sleepily. “It has been noticed that you’ve been wearing your helmet when in our quarters, and it’s been… appreciated.”

Cuan let out a breath, and Teryn gave his wrist a small squeeze. “Ba’gedet’ye.” 

Din nodded, and turned to head back to the Navarro building, and turned back. “Try to get some sleep.” Teryn nodded and turned to Cuan. 

He gave her a gentle nudge. “Sleep?”

“We’ll try.” He put his hand into her hair and they walked back towards his quarters, her leaning on his shoulder, emotionally worn out. 

It didn’t go well. She tried not to toss and turn, and lay awake, staring into the darkness. Eventually she dropped off into a restless doze, and fell back into the nightmare reliving the moment when Rokr took her helmet, but then she turned around and it was Gideon, reaching for her face again. No matter how she pulled and tried to run, she couldn’t move. 

She managed to pull herself out of the nightmare and wake up, rigid and sweating. Cuan was still deeply asleep, and she carefully slipped out of the bed and wrapped a blanket around herself. 

Clearly sleep wasn’t happening tonight. She quietly put on shoes and headed down to the med bay, telling herself that she was just going to check on Fothu. 

Fothu was asleep, and the medic on duty said that he'd been quiet and everything was fine. Teryn nodded, and offered to stay, if the medic would rather go sleep. The medic looked at her dubiously-she thought dimly that she must look pretty bad, she really should have at least tried to do something about her hair, and not come wearing her sleeping clothes and with a blanket draped around her shoulders- but shrugged and agreed. 

Teryn settled in next to Fothu, staring off into the distance, idly finger combing her hair. She could hear Atin’s claws tapping on the floor as he paced outside. She’d trained him early on that he was not to go into medical rooms, but he was still nearby and watchful. It was nice, she thought, that he still stuck with her, even though Jha’iil was obviously his favorite.

It was hard to tell how much time had passed before a soft voice broke into her reverie. “Ad’ika?”

She jerked as she came back to herself, looking around to reorient. _Fothu. Med bay. Covert. Temple. Samaki._ Tuathal was standing in the doorway, dressed, but without the token armor he usually wore. He had his head cocked in her direction, and she gave him a tired smile. “Couldn’t sleep, either?” 

“The old don’t need much sleep.” He came in, and felt around until he found Fothu’s hand, and took it. “How is he?”

“He’s going to be fine. I wanted him here for observation just in case.”

Tuathal nodded, and settled himself into a chair. Teryn eyed him doubtfully. Perhaps he didn’t need much sleep, but surely he needed some. “Wasn’t there anyone else who could stay with him? Surely our healers are up to your standard for that.” 

She looked down at her hands. “I couldn’t sleep. No reason for anyone else to have to stay up.” She shrugged slightly. “I can be useful.”

He made a hum- not of agreement, just of acknowledgement. “When was the last time you had a rest, ad’ika?”

She didn’t answer for a long time. “I slept okay a few nights ago.”

He hummed again, doubtfully. No, she hadn’t. “I don’t mean just sleep. I mean a rest.” 

She glanced at him, then away. He raised his eyebrows and nodded to himself. “I think it’s been a while. You just got here, and already you’re at work.” She didn’t respond, but swallowed, hard. “I don’t know everything that happened to bring you here. I can tell it was… I can tell that a great deal of it wasn’t good, and I can tell that you’ve been holding yourself up against a great deal of strain.”

She continued to not answer, but the lump in her throat got larger and she took a shuddering breath. 

“When was it?” 

She thought back. The years on Panoog had been restful, except for the bone-crushing loneliness. She had gotten used to the loneliness, but that didn't stop it from being exhausting. Maybe it was in the weeks on the Razor Crest with just Din and Jha’iil. They had no idea what they were doing, and there was a sense of constant chaos, but it was peaceful, in its way. And it hadn’t been lonely. 

“Possibly never?” he asked, gently.

Possibly. 

“You can let yourself rest.”

“But…” she couldn’t find the words to express _everything is a mess and I don’t know how to fix it_ and _everyone hates each other_ and _If I’m not useful no one wants me_ and _I don’t know how._

“You are not required to fix anything, ad’ika.” He gave a soft chuckle. “The ade will figure it out, everyone will figure it out. You need to rest. You need to heal.” 

“I’m fine.”

He smiled again, kindly. “You can lie to yourself, and you can lie to others, you can even try to lie to my bu’ad, but you can’t lie to me. I can see the fractures in your soul.” 

She snorted. “There’s where you’re wrong. I don’t have one of those anymore.” 

“Beaten, battered, bruised, perhaps. But it’s still there.” 

She shook her head. “It was taken. _I don’t have it._ ”

He sighed. The middle of the night was perhaps not the best time for this discussion. But then again, this is when it was happening. “Oh, ad’ika, no. Let me tell you what I see. I see a light in everyone, and some are brighter than others. Your vod’ad is bright, shining. You still have yours, but it’s so contracted, like you’re trying to put it into a corner out of sight.” 

She shook her head, and was so focused on staring at her hands that she was surprised when he suddenly was in front of her and took her hands in his, and she felt a soothing warmth start to flow into her own hands. She jerked them away. 

“You hide your light, because you don’t believe you deserve to have it.” 

She whispered, “I don’t.”

“You do. What happened wasn’t your fault. You did not choose, and we are not just our armor.” Tuathal rested his hands on her arms, making sure that he only touched the blanket, and no skin. “I will repeat it as often as it takes. I know you’re not ready to believe it, but that doesn’t make it less true.”

He reached up to cup her cheek, the same way he’d comforted his own children and grandchildren, and his great-grandchild, and she pulled back. He felt her retreat behind the walls of fear and anger and so much shame. “Ni ceta, ad’ika. Ni ceta. But please. You can rest. You are allowed.” 

She shook her head again. _No, if I stop then I have to think. I have to think about everything and I don’t want to._

He turned his head to the door. “Bu’ad. Good.” 

Cuan came in, and paused to take stock of the situation. He’d woken up to find the bed empty, and no sign of Teryn in his quarters. With her boots gone, he had a pretty good idea of where the most likely place was to find her. He knew that she hadn’t been sleeping well, if barely at all, and he’d suspected that he hadn’t woken up every time she had a nightmare. 

And he knew very well that she wouldn’t wake him up if she could help it. 

Tuathal stood up- slowly, old knees weren’t what they used to be- and Cuan took his place, kneeling in front of her. “Cyar’ika, what…” She started to shake, and without another word he pulled her into an embrace, cradling her head under his chin. He looked at his grandfather, questioning. 

“She’s very tired.” 

“LaarSenaar, ner cyar’ika, can you take something?” Cuan stroked her hair on the back of her head. “Just to help you sleep.”

Teryn shuddered. She’d thought about it, she’d told herself she didn’t want to because what if somebody needed medical attention and she was too drugged to handle it? But the truth was, she’d admitted quietly to herself in the dark, what if she wasn’t able to pull herself out of a nightmare? “No.” 

Cuan sighed. “How about if we go back to bed?”

“Can’t leave the kid alone. Go on. I’m okay.” 

Cuan shook his head. It was clear that she was not. “I’m not leaving you by yourself. We don’t have to talk. But I’m staying. Ba’buir?”

Tuathal smiled at Cuan and gently laid on a hand on the top of Teryn’s head. “I am going to sleep. Find me in a few days, ad’ika. I still want to hear you sing.” 

After Tuathal left, Cuan moved them to a bed against the wall, so he could sit and hold her against his chest. They sat, not talking for a long time before she said, “I keep dreaming about him.” 

“Who? Gideon?”

“Gideon. Rokr. Both. They become the same.” 

“You killed Rokr. He can't hurt you or anyone else again.” She shuddered, and he tightened his arms around her. “You’re safe from him.”

“No.” She was silent again for a while. “Except he does, every day, because it never… stops. I’m always the person he…” She trailed off again. “I should have been able to stop him.” 

Cuan closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “It wasn’t your fault.” 

“If…”

“There’s no if. It wasn’t your fault.” He stroked her hair again. “And Gideon wasn’t your fault, either.” 

He didn’t sleep, they didn’t talk anymore, and she only dozed off near dawn. Finally, Roccan came in and frowned in confusion. Cuan waved his hand. _Don't ask._ “I’m taking her back, and.. I don’t think she’s going to be in for a while. If you have questions, you’ll be able to find her, but…” 

Roccan nodded. He wasn’t sure what was going on, but it was clear to him that something had happened. Cuan picked her up and carried her back to his rooms. He knew she was beyond exhausted, but he wasn’t sure exactly what she needed. 

But he was pretty sure less bullshit would help. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made a Spotify playlist (Dar'Buy'ce) of all the songs T sings and where the chapter titles are coming from.
> 
> https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5R2q3yZ0YAfiYpy7wEDpMw
> 
> Mando'a Translations 
> 
> ori’vod: Older brother  
> vod'ika: Little sister  
> Dar’manda: a state of not being Mandalorian - not an outsider, but one who has lost his heritage, and so his identity and his soul - regarded with absolute dread by most traditionall-minded Mando'ade  
> ad’ika: little one  
> Ba’vodu: Parent's sibling  
> Ba’gedet’ye: You're welcome! (Like the German use of bitte.)  
> ade: Children  
> bu’ad: grandchild  
> vod’ad: Sibling's child  
> Cyar’ika: darling, sweetheart  
> LaarSenaar: Songbird  
> ner: My  
> Ba’buir: Grandparent


	6. There I felt the crossroads of time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The children of the two Coverts are given the consequences for fighting. 
> 
> Paz and Cuan have... a conversation.

The Foundlings and the Herd sat on opposite sides of the training room, eyeing each other with utter hostility. Fothu was out of the med bay, with a bandage on his head, and the various broken and sprained limbs were splinted. The Navarro Foundlings all had their helmets on, and the Samaki Herd were resolutely not wearing theirs, though they all had their helmets with them.

The instructions had been clear. Show up, with your helmet, sit down, and wait for the al’verde bajur. Do not speak, do not move, _do not fight._

There had been discussions on both sides debating if using signs counted as speaking. Both sides had eventually decided that while an argument could be made, it was best not to tempt the wrath of alor. Either of them. 

Rima and the Armorer marched in, followed by their al’verdes, Paz and Ademe, and the al'verde bajur from each tribe, all of them wearing their helmets. The whole mess of children straightened up, and a few of the older ones stood up. Rima waved her hand for them to sit down, and the six adults stared down at the children. 

It was the first time a number of the Samaki Herd had been stared down by so many adults with helmets. 

“Obviously, this is about the fight between you yesterday.” Rima began. “The long and short of it is, we’re disappointed. A scuffle is one thing, but that was…” she shook her head. “That was beyond unacceptable. You are all Mando’ade. You will not behave like this.”

The Armorer nodded, and looked down at the Navarro Foundlings. “That is no way to react to people who have allowed us safe haven. We taught you better than this.” 

“But, alor-”

“ _Silence_.” 

The adults stared at the children for another long minute. “We have come to the decision about your consequences together.” Rima said, and nodded at the Samaki al’verde bajur. 

“We just ended the cold season, which means there’s a great deal of clean up to be done around the Covert. And you will be doing it all, after you have finished training for the day.” 

There was a pause as every Samaki child did the math and realized that this meant no unsupervised playing for a long time. And one of the older ones frowned. “What about us? We weren’t even involved!” 

Paz rumbled, “We agreed that it would be all of you, except for the children in the creche. You all need to work together, and it’s a big job, I’m given to understand.” 

The Samaki Herd all looked at each other, and scowled. The Navarro Foundlings did the same. “They were the ones who attacked us.” one of them muttered. 

Paz nodded. “And you insulted them. Now you will learn to work together.” 

“And if any of you get injured while doing this job...or ever, you will report the med bay, and you will be treated by whoever is on duty. No waiting until someone you like better is available.” The Navarro al’verde bajur said.

One of the Navarro Foundlings pouted. “I only want to see our al’baar’ur.” 

Rima shrugged. “She won’t be available for a while. So don’t get hurt.” The Armorer and Paz each gave her a look. This was news to them. 

Ademe looked at the entire room. “There are downed trees and branches to clean up, walking paths that need to be repaired, the gardens need to be tended to, and a whole host of other things. And no, before you ask, we are not letting you split yourselves up. You lot, you’ve lived here. You know where things are. You will help your new comrades, who don’t know how things work here. You’re all vode. You will be verde someday. Act like it.” She folded her arms and gave them all a long, searching look. 

“As for you,” she looked at the Navarro Foundlings. “I know it is new and it’s a lot. But watch, listen, and learn.” They all nodded, shamefaced behind their helmets.

“This is what you will be doing until the job is done to our- all of our- satisfaction. Any more fighting will be frowned upon, and you will not like the consequences.”

Fothu muttered so that only the people nearest to him could hear, “We don’t like the consequences _now_.” 

Faris tentatively raised his hand. “Alor? Do we… what about our helmets?” 

Rima glanced at the Armorer, interested in what the answer would be. 

“As you have not taken the Creed yet, and as this, all of it, is a Covert, you may choose whether to wear your helmet or not.” 

The Foundlings nodded. They had discussed the matter amongst themselves and they hadn’t been sure if their covert was just the building they had been assigned. This, at least, gave some clarity. 

With that, they left al’verdes bajur with sorting out the children into work groups and assigning them their first tasks. Rima had been quite confident that things could take upwards of a week, two if they decided to be difficult, and by then, maybe, just maybe they’d all come to terms with each other. 

Paz glanced at the Armorer, and then stopped them. “What’s wrong with the al’baar’ur?” he asked, bluntly. “Did you healer decide she wasn’t good enough after all?” 

Rima glared at him. “She needs a break.”

“What are you talking about? She’s fine.” 

“If you were at all practiced at reading people and their faces, you’d be able to see that she is not. That girl has been putting on a good show for you for how long? She needs time before being flung headfirst into anything.” Rima gave Paz a glare, and threw one at the Armorer for good measure. “I can’t possibly imagine what she’s gone through as a result of your idea of the Way.” 

The Armorer stilled, and Paz growled. 

Rima took a deep breath, and held up her hand. “N’eparavu takisit. The old alor came to me this morning and told me that she was desperately in need of rest, and I trust his counsel.” 

The Armorer gave a nod, and then glanced at Paz. “I understand.”

“You do?” Paz did not understand.

“I do.” She gives Paz another look that he understands to mean _we will discuss this later._ “I have not yet met the old alor. I would like to, at some point.” 

Rima nodded. “I will let him know.” She considered through her list of issues, and settled on one that seemed to be the least fraught. “When do you expect to light your forge?” 

“Soon. In a few days.” 

Rima nodded. “Let me know if you need anything.” The Armorer nodded, and Paz made a very slight motion with his head that could be mistaken for a nod, if you really wanted it to be.

Paz glared at Rima and Ademe’s receding backs, and then turned to his alor. “What the fuck was that?” 

The Armorer sighed. “They have a different interpretation of the Way than we do.” 

“So they’re _wrong_.” 

“Are they?” The Armorer frowned to herself. She had no illusions that this would be easy. It was still harder than she’d expected. 

Well, it was only day four. 

Paz left the Armorer and went to find out where Teryn was. This was ridiculous. Surely she couldn’t be as bad off as all that. Walking through the main areas of the compound where many of people he saw were in armor but unhelmeted made him uneasy. He was already pretty worked up when he went into the med bay, and once he saw the Samaki healer, he snapped.

“Isn’t she good enough to work with you?”

Roccan stepped back and frowned. “What?”

“Where is she? Why isn’t she here?” 

“Who?” Roccan had a pretty good fucking idea who, but fuck this guy. 

“The al’baar’ur.” Paz towered over him, using every bit of intimidation his bulk could convey. “I would expect her to be here. She’s never anywhere else.” 

Roccan narrowed his eyes. “Maybe that’s part of the problem. She was carried out of here this morning, looking like death. She shouldn’t have been here at all last night.” 

“Carried.”

“Yes. Carried. She’s probably with Cuan.” Without another word, Paz turned on his heel and stomped away. Roccan debated with himself about giving Cuan a warning that an angry blue mountain was going to visit him. On one hand, it would be polite. On the other, Cuan would probably maim this asshole and solve some problems if he were surprised. 

On the gripping hand, that _would_ create more and different problems. Roccan sighed and quickly commed Cuan’s rooms. “Incoming. Angry asshole verd coming your way.” 

Cuan had thanked Roccan when the blows started on his door. He glanced in the sleeping room- Teryn had finally fallen into a deeper sleep once they got back to his rooms, and he did not want her disturbed. Not by anything, and certainly not by this.

He grabbed his helmet, shoved it on, and opened the door. He heard Paz inhale and Cuan put both hands on Paz’s chest and propelled them back out into the hall. “We can do this quietly here, or we can do this loudly outside, but we are not doing this in there.” 

Paz froze. Cuan wasn’t a small man, but he wasn’t Paz’s size. He got the feeling, though, that this man really wanted to beat the living shit out of him. “I just want-”

“I don’t care what you want. Outside or not?” Paz didn’t answer, and Cuan smiled to himself. “Outside it is.” 

It was sunny. Who knows when the last time was that Paz had to do anything in the sunshine? Cuan grabbed his arm and dragged him out where they would be visible but not obvious. Rima wouldn’t like him getting into a throwdown without making a token effort to make it not obvious. 

“What.”

Paz pulled back and regarded the smaller man in surprise. “I just want to talk to her.”

“You’ve done enough to her.” 

“I-” Paz stopped, flustered.

“No. You will not talk to her until and unless she is ready and wants to. She is…” Cuan exhaled slowly. “She needs time and quiet and not to be bothered by zealots smashing down the door because they’re pissed about something.” 

“I’m not… a zealot.” 

Cuan regarded him with scorn that could be seen through his helmet. “If I took my bucket off right now, what would you think?”

Paz stepped back. “I…”

“For fuck’s sake, you wouldn’t even let her explain _anything_. Do you have any idea what that did? After what she’d done for you?” Cuan scoffed. “Sounds like fucking zealotry to me.”

“This is the Way.” Paz fell back on familiar ground. 

“Your Way is crap.” 

“And yours is better?”

“Doesn’t cause this.” Cuan stepped forward. “We wouldn’t have blamed her and taken the coward who did this back without even questioning anything. We wouldn’t have made her kill him herself. How many others have you thrown out?”

“You don’t know what we went through. This is the Way, and this is how we preserve who we are.” Paz stepped forward until he was visor to visor with Cuan. “We had to protect ourselves by hiding our faces and our names. Look what happened when Gideon found out her name, or the beroya’s name. We fled the Purge and went underground to protect ourselves and our children.”

“We suffered the same Purge. We suffered the Siege.” Cuan narrowed his eyes. “In fact, we were on opposite sides of the Siege, weren’t we?” 

“Fuck you.” 

“Death Watch threw in with an enemy sorcerer - twice!- and look where that got all of us.” Cuan gestured around. “Here.” 

Paz threw a wild punch that Cuan dodged easily. Paz reached for his vibroblade when a grappling hook snaked around his arm and pulled him off balance. Paz looked up to see Din, and only barely restrained himself from attacking him. 

“Knock it off!” Din hissed at them both. “This isn’t the time for a religious debate. Did you not spend the morning negotiating how to get the Foundlings to work with the kids here? How do you think it looks for you two to be fighting?” 

Paz growled, but he couldn’t deny that Din was right. He couldn’t deny it at all. 

Din turned and glared at Cuan. Cuan shrugged, but kept his mouth shut. Paz unhooked Din’s grappling line from his wrist and scowled. “This isn’t over.”

“I hope not.” 

Din sighed as Paz stomped off. Hopefully, he could find a tree to take his frustration out on, and not some unsuspecting person in the training room they still hadn’t sorted out. He looked back at Cuan. “I came to see how my vod’ika is.”

Cuan pulled off his helmet and ran a hand over his eyes. “She’s asleep.”

“Is she actually asleep, or doing that thing where she’s pretending she’s asleep so you don’t notice that she’s not?” 

Cuan chuckled. “That’s a known thing she does?”

“Been doing it ever since we were kids.” 

“I’m pretty sure she’s actually asleep.” Cuan glanced at the building. “I hope that didn’t wake her up.”

“I hope so, too.” Din sighed, and resisted the urge to ask to see her. “Her vod’ad was worried. I’ll tell him that she’s resting.” 

Cuan nodded. “When she wakes up, I’ll let her know you were asking- that you both were asking.” He glanced in the direction Paz stomped off to. “I am not going to tell her about that.” 

Din agreed privately, but the chain of command was still important. “He is still her al’verde.” 

Cuan grimaced. “He shouldn’t be.” 

“He is a good commander, in general. He’s got his blind spots, but… he’s been our alor’s right hand for a long time.” Din tilted his head, considering. “His clan was… his clan founded Death Watch. It’s personal for him, and he feels the weight.”

“Doesn’t excuse it.” 

“No, it doesn’t. Might explain some things.” Din shrugged. “Tell her I was here. I’m sure you’ve noticed she has a habit of saying she’s fine, when she’s not.”

“I had noticed, yes.” Cuan said, dryly. 

Din paused, then shrugged. “She had a garden, before. Maybe she’d like to do that again.” 

The children were split into their groups, and given instructions for what their jobs for the day were. Fothu was sent to the gardens with another Samaki kid, Upio, and one of the Navarro Foundlings, Crezi. Crezi was also ten, and had been picked up on a farming planet when she was five. The Navarro al’verde bajur had hoped that she would find the gardens to be a good fit, at least at first. 

Fothu was still furious that he and his cohort were being punished for something that clearly wasn’t their fault. Upio was nine, and had honestly been relieved that the punishment wasn’t worse. Plus this way, she got to talk to one of the new kids without all of her friends getting in the way. 

The woman who managed the gardens, Saojeme, introduced herself to Crezi, and was nonplussed when Crezi merely nodded, but said nothing. She sent them out of a garden bed that needed to be completely weeded out- they didn’t need to pay attention to what they were pulling. That seemed a good first step for a bunch of angry kids. 

Crezi watched Fothu and Upio pull up plants for a while, before kneeling down and starting to imitate their movements. She was clumsy at first, and Fothu snorted with scorn.

“Don’t you know how to weed?”

Crezi looked at him for a minute. “No. We lived underground.” 

Upio looked between them, waiting to see if the Navarro girl would say anything else. When she didn’t, and Fothu continued to scowl, Upio took matters into her own hands. 

“Was it fun?” 

Crezi started to nod, then remembered herself. They had agreed not to be forthcoming right away. 

“What games did you play?” When Crezi didn’t answer, Upio continued, “We climb on the rocks of course. Like yesterday. Or tag. Or hide and seek.”

“We played hide and seek.” Crezi was so quiet, that Upio almost didn’t hear. 

“In the underground?”

“Yeah. We lived in the sewers so there were lots of tunnels.” 

Upio had so many questions. “Did it smell?” 

Fothu muttered something about “...no wonder all of you are smelly.” 

Crezi understood what Upio was asking immediately. “Well… no more than the rest of the planet. It wasn’t that kind of sewer.” 

“Oh.” 

They worked in silence for a while, then Crezi asked, “What else do you do for fun?” 

“When it’s warmer we can go swimming! There’s a place where we can swim up at the top of the valley.”

Crezi stopped and said wistfully. “I haven’t been swimming since I can barely remember.”

“You didn’t have anywhere you could swim before?” This was truly tragic. Swimming was the best part of the hot season, in Upio’s opinion. 

“No. The only river near us was the lava river.” 

“ _You had a lava river?”_

“Yeah! We weren’t supposed to go down there, but we did a lot and threw things into it.” Crezi sighed. “I always tried to catch one of the fire otters, so I could have it as a pet. My buir said I could keep one if I could catch it, but I never could.”

“That’s so cool. I wish we had a lava river.” Upio sat back, and cocked her head at Crezi. “My name is Upio. What’s yours?”

“Alor says we have to protect our names.” 

Upio shrugged. “Okay. I’m gonna call you Lava. Is that okay?” 

Around the compound, similar conversations were happening among the groups. The oldest foundlings were being much more circumspect than their younger counterparts, and no Navarro Foundlings had shared their name- that habit was far too ingrained. 

But it was progress. Both Rima and the Armorer received their reports and were deeply relieved. Maybe, just maybe, this could work after all. 

After dinner, all the children gathered into one of the large common rooms. The old alor was of a mind to tell stories, and when the old alor wanted to tell stories, all the children loved to listen. Fothu had tried to keep his Samaki comrades from letting any of the Navarro Foundlings know, but Upio and a few others decided that was both stupid and mean, and ran off to go collect their new… well, friends was a strong word at this point. 

In a clump, the Navarro Foundlings, led by Faris, all crept into the room, wearing their helmets, and were a bit discomforted by the sight of so many adults not wearing one. None of them had been near so many people not wearing helmets since becoming Foundlings. 

But Tuathal was wearing his, and he cocked his head at their entrance. “Welcome. Tonight we will begin with the story of Lypatri Pasag and the Last Charge of the Mythosaurs…” 

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (There is no posting schedule. It all happens when it happens, and this chapter happened fast.)
> 
> I made a Spotify playlist (Dar'Buy'ce) of all the songs T sings and where the chapter titles are coming from.
> 
> https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5R2q3yZ0YAfiYpy7wEDpMw
> 
> The story of Lypatri Pasag and the Last Charge of the Mythosaurs can be found here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23916571
> 
> Mando'a translations
> 
> al’verde bajur: Commander of educating children  
> alor: Chief  
> al'verde: Commander  
> Mando’ade: Sons and daughters of Mandalore  
> al’baar’ur: Doctor  
> vode: Brothers/Comrades  
> verde: Soldiers  
> N’eparavu takisit: sorry (lit: I eat my insult)  
> beroya: Bounty Hunter  
> vod’ika: Little sister  
> vod’ad: Siblings child


	7. That it's all built upon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In ideal times, a Forge should not be lit with new fire. 
> 
> These hadn't been ideal times for quite a while.

Faris’ punishment for sneaking along on the mission to rescue Teryn from Gideon was to help the Armorer set up the Forge. There was a great deal of work to make sure it was done right. 

The building needed to be inspected to make sure it would be able to handle the heat, and shielding put in place where the forge would go. The Forge itself needed to be assembled, and checked and double checked to make sure everything was connected properly- one mistake could have dire consequences. 

Her tool chest needed to be brought in, along with all the beskar and other metals, all the equipment for tuning armor and the various bits and pieces. They needed to be sorted and organized and the space needed to be set up properly- they had the space, and they had the luxury of being able to do it correctly, so they’d use it. 

The fact that the Armorer was taking the time to set up the Forge so meticulously was a sign to her people that she intended, that she hoped, that this would be a long stay. 

Faris didn’t mind helping. It was hard work, but it was interesting. And as long as the Armorer wasn’t in a bad mood, she would explain everything if he asked. 

Of course, now with having to help with the cleanup as punishment for the younger Foundlings’ transgressions, and having early morning extra training with his buir, that didn’t leave much time to help the Armorer. And in the days after the Foundlings were given their punishment, the Armorer had been quiet, thinking. 

His buir was silent and brooding, as well. 

Faris had been turning over the helmet issue in his mind. He’d heard that this Covert was less strict, and it had been _weird_ to see Cuan without his helmet. Just weird. He had seen how the man was in the weeks he’d been with them on Jelucan, and he had seen how well the man had worked with Din and his buir when they’d gone to rescue the al’baar’ur. So how could he think that he was less of a Mandalorian?

It was a lot to think about. 

The Armorer had sorted through the piles of beskar they had. For such a small Covert, they had quite a bit. But that was only because she’d been able to salvage the armor of those that had been killed in the attack on the Covert on Navarro. She had no illusions that if Gideon had actually been on the planet at the time, he would have gone down to the tunnels and stolen every piece they had. 

It had been luck, as much as skill, that saved that beskar. 

There had been two ingots of the beskar left over from when Djarin had turned in the Child- Jha’iil, she reminded herself. She’d used one in improving Teryn’s armor. Mostly out of guilt, she admitted to herself. She’d told Din that the Creed hadn’t served Teryn well, and it hadn’t. Allowing her the dignity of her armor was the least she could do.

It was also the most she could do. 

Since Teryn had come back, and since she’d revealed the truth about what had happened to her- no, the Armorer corrected herself- what was done to her, she kept thinking about what that meant. 

When the hut’uun had brought her helmet back with the story that Teryn had cut and run, it hadn’t seemed like her. But he had her helmet. The Armorer had recognized it. He had her helmet, and that was that. No one questioned his story. 

They should have. She could admit that. They should have allowed her in. Paz had reported that Teryn had tried to come back, of course -to not do so would have been a breach of duty- and at the time, the Armorer had thought he’d done the right thing. There was no point to it. This was the Way.

During the Civil Wars, the identity of a member of Death Watch had been something that was vital to protect. The families of members of Death Watch had been targeted, so they had retreated behind their helmets and didn’t use their names for the safety of everyone. The leaders of Death Watch had said this was a requirement of the Way- a dose of fundamentalism had made the strict safety precautions more palatable, and had weeded out anyone who did not truly believe in their mission. 

Ever since the Purge, her Tribe had remained entrenched behind tradition- the Resol’nare mandated wearing armor, which they had been taught meant all of their armor. It wasn’t practical or reasonable for parents and children to never see each other’s faces, so that exception was allowed. Their names were as protected as their faces- if all the auretii saw was a single Mandalorian in helmet and armor, and never was given a name, they could never be sure how many there were, or where they came from. 

Secrecy is survival. Survival is strength. 

And it had worked, up until the moment that it hadn’t. 

But they had revealed themselves in the defense of a Foundling, and the Creed was clear on that. She mourned the deaths of her Tribe, she mourned them deeply. But to the Armorer, it was the Way. The Way was structure, it was a comfort in discomforting times.

These times were differently discomforting. 

In ideal times, a Forge should not be lit with new fire. These were not ideal times. The Forge had been relit by new fire three times since the Purge, and the Armorer had tried to save some embers from the Forge on Jelucan, but the truth was she couldn’t quite remember how. 

She was just getting the final settings adjusted when the Samaki armorer came in. She hadn’t met him, yet- almost all of her interactions had been with the Chief, and a bit with the Al’verde. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to meet anyone else, it was just that she needed to get her space and her sanctuary set up in order to even begin to deal with everything else. 

And everything did need dealing with. But giving her people the excuse that “alor hasn’t figured that out yet” gave them breathing space, as well, and time to deal with the sky and the trees and the space. 

The Foundlings weren’t the only ones needing time to adapt. She made a note to herself to ask the al’baar’ur about sunburns. 

Sadet waited patiently by the door of the Forge, and the Armorer waited for him to come in. He assumed that she was not as oblivious as he was- when he was working he usually didn’t notice anything around him unless it was necessary. So he waited politely for a signal to enter. She was used to her people coming in and sitting down until she was ready to acknowledge them. 

Sadet wasn’t deeply interested in social niceties. He understood metal, and he understood what kind of metal his people needed. The Samaki Covert was used to his blunt questions and conversations ending abruptly. He tried not to be a jerk, but the nuances of people were confusing, so he mostly ignored them.

He had asked Rima what he should do, and she told him to wear his helmet- which he did most of the time anyway, since no one liked getting sparks in their face, and to be polite. She did not elaborate on what that meant. Well, she had been busy. 

So he politely waited, and the Armorer politely waited, and there had been a real possibility that they would polite each other to death, when Faris came back from his work assignment. He looked from one, to the other, and back again, and sighed to himself. 

“Won’t you please come in?” He gestured to the visitor’s seat. Sadet nodded, gratefully, and sat down. The Armorer also nodded, and sat down across from him. He held out a box full of glowing coals he had brought. 

“I brought fire from our Forge. To light yours.” 

The Armorer sat back, honestly taken aback by the gesture. “Vor entye.” 

Sadet waved his hand in dismissal. “It’s nothing.”

It was _everything._ “It’s a great deal.” The Armorer gestured to Faris, who had faded into a corner, but since no one had told him to go, he didn’t. Faris brought her another box, and she placed down on the low table between her and Sadet. “Please accept this with our thanks.”

Sadet opened the box and hummed in pleasure. Inside was six beskar ingots- they had been melted down from the salvaged armor. “This is… thank you.” 

“Beskar belongs with the Tribe- any Tribe. Please accept this with our gratitude.” 

Sadet pulled off his glove to touch it with his bare fingers. “We have been looking for the beskar and other items that were stolen during the Purge, and have been able to reclaim… some. But the children keep _growing_.” He sounded slightly put out by this development. 

The Armorer chuckled slightly. “They do that, yes.” 

He looked up from the ingots. “The armor on your people is very good.” 

“Thank you. I have not had a chance to examine yours yet.” 

“You’ve been busy. Did you learn on Concordia?”

“...Yes.” 

Sadet nodded. “I thought so. There’s a starkness to your lines that you see in their work.”

She hummed to herself, looking at the box of coals again. “I will be lighting it once the sun goes down, if you’d like to join us?”

“I would like that.” He picked up the container of beskar ingots and nodded a thanks, and left. He realized that he’d completely forgotten to tell her his name, and she didn’t seem to care. 

Teryn spent a couple of days sleeping, or at least trying to, and sometimes succeeding. But no one seemed to expect anything of her, and most people left her alone. Jha’iil demanded that Din bring him by every day so he could tell her everything he’d gotten up to in the creche- being around other kids meant that his vocabulary was growing by leaps and bounds, so his long strings of babbling would be interspersed with more words. They played, and ate uj’alayi, and there were naps in a pile, and a whole host of other things that Jha’iil didn’t have words for yet. 

Din didn’t ask how she was doing, thank the stars, or demand anything, He would just give her the news of the day- how the Foundlings were settling, how everyone else was doing, if Paz had actually exploded yet or not. 

The answer was not yet, with the over/under was another week or so. Less, if he and Cuan decided to throw down. 

Cuan had mentioned the garden, and she couldn’t deny that the thought of digging into the dirt again sounded really good. She hadn’t been a great gardener on Panoog- she learned from the holonet and asking questions whenever she had a second. But it had been nice, and she’d managed to grow decent behot, which was the most important thing. 

Caff was good. Behot was better. 

She had packed some seeds when she left Panoog. Maybe. Maybe. 

But for the moment, she was trying to take Tuathal’s advice. Rest. Rima and the Armorer seemed to be willing to allow it, and no one else asked much. She’d sent Roccan a note about the kid with the bruised kidneys, but beyond a couple of clarifying questions, he’d left her alone as well.

After a few days of this, Teryn was growing restless. Sitting still had never been an option before, so she’d never learned how to do it. Even though Panoog had been a small planet, she was still the only trained doctor for most of the population, so there she was at least always busy. 

_You need to rest._ Sure. Maybe. Possibly. But how?

The same day that Sedat had brought the coals to the Armorer, Teryn got a call from the creche. 

“Um. So… you’re the ba’vodu to the new… uh… the new kid?”

Teryn smiled to herself. “The green one? Yes.”

“Right. Um. Can you come down here? There’s a… problem…? And we can’t reach his buir.” 

Teryn didn’t run. She absolutely didn’t run. But she walked very fast. In the creche, Jha’iil was in one corner, clutching something and weeping, and the other children were in the opposite corner, ranging from looking concerned to terrified. Everything in the room had been shoved to the walls. Furniture, toys, blocks, cups… it was a mess. 

She looked at the minders. “What happened?”

At the sound of her voice, Jha’iil broke from the corner and ran over, crying harder. He clawed at her boots, but couldn’t focus enough to climb. She picked him up and he shoved his face into her neck and howled. 

“K’uur, k’uur. Vod’ad. It’s okay. I’m here. K’uur.” She looked back at the minders, questioning.

One of them sighed. “He brings a toy to share every day. And today he brought a frog. Two of the children fought over it, and…” 

Teryn could guess the logical conclusion of events. “It tore?” 

The minder nodded. “And he just… lost it. And suddenly everything had been shoved away from him, including the children.” 

“Is anyone hurt?”

“No. They’re scared, but no one is hurt. He didn’t want any of us approaching him, and his buir is up on his ship, we couldn’t reach him quickly. So we called you.” 

Teryn sighed. “I’m very sorry about… this. I’ll take him. Do you need help cleaning this up?”

“Did he do that?” The minder looked at the weeping Jha’iil with a mixture of concern and awe. 

Teryn paused, but there really was no other answer than the truth. “Yes. He did that.” 

“...oh. Well, that’s…”

“Yes. It is.” She patted Jha’iil on the back. “I’ll get him calmed down and we will see what we can do.” 

“Tell his buir we want to talk to him before we allow him back. I’m not saying he can’t, but…” 

‘'I understand.” 

By the time she got back to her own room in the Navarro covert, Jha’iil’s howls had subsided into hiccups and the occasional tiny wail. Once inside, she got him some water. “Can I see the froggie?” 

Sadly, Jha’iil held out his frog. It had two legs nearly torn off, and she nodded in sympathy. It was his newest toy. Not his most prized (that was his precious stuffed mythosaur), but definitely up in the rankings. “I can try to do surgery to make him better. Should we do that?” 

Jha’ill nodded, sniffling. He watched as she pulled out her suture kit, and she explained everything she was doing as she realigned the legs, and carefully sewed them back on, demonstrating different kinds of knots. By the time both legs were back on, Jha’iil was much calmer. 

“If we can find more of the right kind of stuffing, we can put that back in, like a transfusion, but now, he’ll live. Okay?”

“Yeah.” He picked up his frog and clutched it to his chest. 

She picked him up. “Your buir is gonna want to talk to you about this, but I’m gonna guess this is the first time you had someone break something of yours, right?” He didn’t answer, and she didn’t expect him to. “So you got really mad.” 

“Mad?” 

“Mmmmhmmm. And you scared your friends.” 

“Not friends. Mean.” 

“They’re young. Like you.” 

He snuggled into her neck. “Laar?”

“Okay. One song.” 

“Now that the time has come  
Soon gone is the day  
There upon some distant shore  
You'll hear me say  
Long as the day in the summer time  
Deep as the wine dark sea  
I'll keep your heart with mine.  
Till you come to me.”

Jha'iil hummed contentedly as she finished, and Din knocked on the door. “Is he okay?” 

“Did they tell you what happened?” Teryn handed over Jha’iil, who started crying again at the sight of his buir. 

“Yeah. Fuck.” Din snuggled the kid close, and Jha’iil held out his frog for Din to look at. 

“Well. It was bound to happen sooner or later.” 

“I was hoping I’d have a better idea of what to do when it did.” He sighed, examining the frog. “He never lashed out like this anywhere else.” 

“These kids are all a lot younger, and it’s been an unsettled time for everyone.”

Din nodded, and sighed. “Alor is lighting the Forge tonight.” 

Teryn nodded. 

“You should come.” Din paused. “...both of you.” 

Teryn smiled. “We’ll be there.” 

“And I got a message from Cara- she’s got a job that she thought I’d want. It-”

“‘Pays handsomely’?” She raised an eyebrow, grinning. 

Din scowled. “Shut up.” 

“I’m not sorry.” 

“ _I know._ Yes, it pays well, and probably won’t take too long, just a day or two, if the intel is good… would you maybe want to come along? Just to get a break? He’d be coming too- I don’t want to leave him, I just thought…”

“....that would be nice.” She nodded. “Yes, if alor is willing to allow it…” 

Din made a huff. “She’d probably let you do anything you wanted, to be honest.” Teryn gave him a questioning look. “She told me she thought we’d been imposing on your goodwill.” 

“Oh.” She thought about that for a second. “I mean…” 

“She thought you might want to leave. I wasn’t so sure.” Din nodded around at her mostly empty room. She still had a few of her things there, but functionally, she was pretty much living with Cuan. 

Not that they’d talked about it, it just sort of happened. 

“I don’t know. We don’t know. This is all still… new.” 

Din nodded. “We’ll talk to alor tomorrow, after the Forge is lit. She’ll probably be a lot more receptive then. She’s been… tense.”

“Needs something to beat her frustrations out on?” 

Din chuckled, but she wasn’t exactly wrong. 

She went back to Cuan’s rooms, where he had brought dinner back. Communal eating was an option, but not everyone took it for every meal. She’d only occasionally eaten in a large group since the end of war, and had never gotten comfortable with it- eating was supposed to be a private, family thing, not a community thing. It was just so intimate, and Cuan hadn’t tried to push it. All in good time. 

Sometimes they’d eaten with Tuathal, but that evening Atriu had claimed him first, and she was still refusing to deal with Teryn at all. That was better than open hostility, as far as Teryn was concerned. 

“Alor- my alor- is lighting the Forge tonight. We should go.”

Cuan nodded. “Of course.” 

“And my ori’vod is going off-world, his bounty guild contact offered him a job that should pay pretty well, and well…” _We don’t want to be the poor relations._ “Anyway, he asked if I’d go with him.”

Cuan looked up in surprise. “What did you tell him?”

“That I’d go, if alor allowed it.”

“Which alor?”

“...mine?” 

“Ah.” He paused and considered. “Were you going to discuss it with me?”

“Um. I am? Right now?”

“No, you’re just _telling_ me what you’re going to do, not _discussing_.”

Teryn frowned in confusion. “I don’t know why you’re mad.” 

“I’m not mad.” 

She looked at him narrowly. “I don’t…. Need your permission.”

“That’s not what I’m saying!” He took a deep breath. “You’re just saying that you’re going off world for a while…” 

“It’s just a couple of days!” 

“I just wish you’d discussed it with me before deciding.” He took her hands. “We’re in this together, remember? So…” 

Teryn nodded, but really didn’t understand. “Okay… ”

Cuan sighed. Sometimes he would forget how self-reliant she’d had to be. The thought of discussing the idea with him simply hadn’t occurred to her. She hasn’t been in any sort of relationship where that kind of discussion would have happened, possibly ever. Sure, there had been the teacher, but even that, it was clear, wasn’t really anything like a partnership, just two people who happened to travel in the same direction for a while. 

“It’s okay, cyar’ika. Just… next time.”

She nodded again, but was still deeply confused. It was just a couple of days, and she didn’t have anything that needed doing. Besides, she really should try to learn to sleep without him there at some point, eventually, right? What was the big deal? 

  
  
That evening, they went to the Navarro Forge, where there was little ceremony. Just the entire Tribe gathered, with a few visitors. Cuan, of course, and Sadet. Rima had come, too. Sadet had told her that he brought the coals over, and she was as pleased with the gift as the Armorer had been to receive it. And she’d been more than pleased with the gift of beskar. It was valuable beyond words.

She’d had a pretty good idea where it had come from, as well, which made it an even more meaningful gift. 

This could work. This whole thing could work. 

The Armorer placed the coals from Sedat in the Forge, and it flared to life. The entire Navarro Tribe let out a silent sigh of relief. The Forge was lit, the beskar mythosaur skull was above it, and this place was now approaching yaim. 

_Home_.   
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Penelope's Song" by Loreena McKennit: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jn6ysOeqiIs
> 
> Mando'a Translations:
> 
> buir: Parent  
> al’baar’ur: Doctor  
> hut’uun: Coward (worst possible insult)  
> auretii: Outsider  
> Al’verde: Commander  
> alor: chief  
> Vor entye: Thank you (Lit: "I accept a debt")  
> ba’vodu: Parent's sibling  
> k’uur: Hush  
> vod'ad: Sibling's child  
> Laar: Song  
> ori’vod: Big brother  
> cyar’ika: Sweetheart, beloved.


	8. See you on the other side of the war

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Teryn, Din, and Jha'iil go on a road trip, and hang out with Cara.

As expected, the lighting of the Forge did improve the Armorer’s mood. She agreed to Teryn going with Din, but not without caveats and concerns. “Moff Gideon is still looking for you. You must be careful. No unnecessary risks.” 

“Of course, alor. Necessary risks only.” 

The Armorer’s glare could be seen through her helmet. Teryn looked at her feet. “We’ll be careful.” Din said, glaring at his vod’ika. 

“Please see if there are any supplies that need to be acquired, and,” The Armorer paused and considered. “It would be polite to check with the other alor to see if there is anything they would like.”

Teryn nodded. “Makes sense.”

“Let us know if you will be gone longer than two standard days. I do not wish to deal with worried…” The Armorer glanced at Teryn. “...companions.” 

Teryn chewed on her lip, but nodded. She and Din left to begin preparations. 

“We’ll leave later this afternoon. Can you check with the other alor about the potential supplies?”

Teryn nodded. “Of course. Do you want me to take him?”

Din hadn’t wanted to leave Jha’iil in the creche, not right after his outburst. Everyone was quietly relieved with this decision. He handed over the kid, who cheerfully took his place with a hand fisted around one braid. “I’ll let Cara know our ETA.”

Rima had a running list of things the Covert needed- fresh fruits and vegetables, grains, other food stuffs, some medical things, this and that. “And child-sized shoes. We do keep _feeding_ them.” 

Teryn looked through the list, nodding, while Rima counted a pile of credits. “We don’t have a large cooling unit on the Razor Crest, and our alor also asked for some fresh things. Do you have one that can be quickly put in?” Rima nodded, and Teryn glanced over the list again. “No mechanicals?”

“No, we have a salvage team that keeps up with that. I don’t ask how they manage to get everything.” Rima laughed. “Arkil once asked if I wasn’t sure they weren’t just each three Jawas in armor.” 

“...are you?”

“Honestly? There are days I’m not sure.” Rima considered Jha’iil, who was doing his best impression of a quiet, well-behaved child. “So he can move things, can he?”

Teryn nodded. “Yes.” 

“And he is the one that Moff Gideon is looking for.” Rima already knew this, but clarification was never a bad idea. At Teryn’s nod, Rima frowned. “Is it a good idea to take him off-world? He’s protected here. You both are.” 

“Having a couple days to… reset? Take a breath? Seems like a good idea for all of us.” Teryn grinned, even if the grin didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Alor made us promise no unnecessary risks.” 

“I see.” Rima tilted her head, “Are you...well?”

Teryn twitched an eyebrow. “I’m getting tired of people asking that. I don’t know. Better, maybe.” 

Rima nodded. All of that was understandable. “Good luck, I hope you find what you’re looking for.” She picked up a comm unit. “I’ll have the cooling unit brought over right away.” 

Back in Cuan’s rooms, Teryn was finishing the last bit of packing while Jha’iil and Atin played with each other. Jha’iil would use his powers to move a ball around, and Atin would chase it, until Atin would decide to beat the game at its source and knock over Jha’iil. Jha’iil would laugh with delight, and they’d do it all again. 

They could do this for hours. 

Cuan came in as she was repacking her medkit. It was only prudent to be prepared for anything, and bounty hunting, as they say, is a complicated profession. She smiled at him, but with a hint of wariness. They hadn’t really talked any further about the fact that she was leaving for a few days, or that he was upset (and she was convinced he was _upset_ ) that she hadn’t talked with him first. 

He smiled back, and watched her put everything into its place, and then while she closed her eyes and rattled off what was where while pointing. “Do you do that every time?” 

“If possible. It’s easier to make sure I know where everything is.” She huffed back a laugh. “I do it in the med bay too. That’s something to work out with your healer when I go back.” 

He let out a small sigh. _When_ she went back. That meant- 

“Would you please keep an eye on Atin? He’s never been without me, not since he was a kit. I don’t want him pining.”

“You’re not taking him?” 

“No, it’s ridiculous for just a few days, besides…” she ducked her head, “...he likes it here.”

If she was leaving the cat, and thinking about how to handle working with Roccan, that meant she was coming back. A little knot of tension he hadn’t been aware was in his chest loosened. “Of course I’ll keep an eye on him. I got you something.”

He held out a bundle of greyish fabric, and when she shook it out, it was 2 ponchos that would cover up armor, with hoods. “I wasn’t sure if you had any…. I noticed that you lost the cloak you had. It seemed like a good idea.” 

“Thank you.” She looked at him for a minute and swallowed. “I…” her lower lip started to tremble and Jha’iil gave a worried coo. Cuan immediately took her into his arms and pressed his forehead on the top of her head. 

“You said it yourself, it was just a couple of days.” 

“I’m sorry I made you angry.” 

“I’m not angry.” 

“It feels like you’re angry.” 

“I promise I’m not angry. We’ll talk when you get back, but I am not angry.” He threaded his fingers into her hair and massaged her scalp. “Be careful. Come back to me in one piece.” 

“We will.” She cupped his jaw with one hand and stroked his cheek with her thumb. “I will.” 

As the Razor Crest lifted off, both Din and Teryn let out small sighs of relief. There had been so many people and so much change in a short time, and it was nice to be able to get away from it all, even if just for a few days. Teryn felt a little guilty that no one else really could take this opportunity, but really, all three of them needed this. She was also feeling a little out-of-sorts at leaving Cuan behind, but tried not to examine that emotion too much. 

Besides, a bored and restless Din was kind of an asshole, so giving him something to do was for the greater good of everyone. 

“Cara is meeting us on Eentranta, she’ll have the information, and we’ll go from there.”

Teryn perked up. “Cara will be there?” That was exciting. She’d liked the droptrooper when they met her before on Navarro, and even though Teryn hadn’t given the greatest first impression (meeting someone in the afternoon and then drinking over 100 credits worth of their alcohol that night and then passing out in their refresher wasn’t ideal in many cultures), Cara had seemed to like Teryn just fine. 

Din nodded. “She wanted to breathe some non-sulfurous air, and depending on what we find, I thought it would be a good idea if you had some back up. Not,” he added as if he could feel Teryn’s glare at the back of his helmet, “That you need much, but… well, it is the first time we’ve been out since…” Since Gideon, he meant. 

Teryn couldn’t argue with that. He did have a decent point, for once.

“Besides, she likes seeing him, and he likes seeing her."

They passed the rest of the journey in comfortable silence, each occupied with their own thoughts. 

Din was glad that Cara was going to meet them. He missed her, and he wanted to talk to her about… everything, really, but especially Jha’iil’s tantrum. He knew it was a tantrum, that it was common for small children to have out-sized reactions to stressors (stars knew he’d had some in his time), but in this case, the small child could cause a great deal of damage with his reaction. Din wasn’t sure what to do about it. 

Jha’iil was a good kid, and had been really upset when his frog had gotten damaged. Teryn had thought that maybe this was the first time he’d had something that he treasured get damaged like that, and Din thought that was a reasonable theory. Before Din had found him, it was likely that he’d never had toys, not really. He hadn’t had any toys of his own yet on Sorgan, and all of the Navarro kids were older, and were more or less capable of not breaking toys like that, so the group of very small Samaki children were a new experience. 

What he really expected Carasynthia “I don’t do the baby thing” Dune to have to say about that, he wasn’t sure. 

Teryn kept turning those conversations with Cuan over and over in her mind. She still wasn’t exactly sure what he’d been upset about. But they’d been off planet for approximately an hour, and she already missed him. 

Jha'iil chewed on his mythosaur amulet and watched the hyperspace lights. They were going to see his Cara, and he was with his two most favorite people in the galaxy. He was content. 

They landed in the early morning on Eentranta, and Cara was waiting at the spaceport. She broke into a wide grin at seeing the Razor Crest land, and waved when the hatch opened. Jha’iil waited, wiggling, until Din and Cara both gave him a nod, and then he ran at Cara’s ankles, shrieking in joy. “Ca-aa! Ca-aa! SCOOOOO.” He paused and frowned and tried again. “Su cuy.”

Teryn grinned, hearing this as she pulled on one of the light grey hooded ponchos Cuan had given to her. She and Din agreed that her wearing armor without a helmet would draw more eyes and questions than were strictly reasonable, so she’d cover it up under the order of “no unnecessary risks.” She walked out as Din and Cara were thumping each other on the back, and Cara smiled at her.

“You look much better than the last time I saw you.”

“Last time you saw me, I had the hangover to end all hangovers, so I’d hope so.”

Cara grinned and handed Teryn a thermos. “Caff. Thought you could probably use it.” 

Teryn took it gratefully. “Can I trade him in for you?” She said, nodding at Din. 

Din grumbled. “I did save your life a couple of times.” 

Teryn thought that over. “Okay, so you’re even.” Cara laughed. 

Cara had gotten a room at a boarding house, and they went there to discuss the particulars. The target was there, on Eentranta, and needed to be collected and then delivered to the client at Canto Bight. 

Din and Teryn both groaned. Canto Bight was a mess to get in and out of, but that explained why the bounty was so high. If you weren’t smart and careful, Canto Bight was a disaster for resupplying. Sure, you could find things for decent prices, if you knew where to go and were willing to risk some of the seedier parts of the city for it. 

“Do you have any idea how long it’ll take you to collect the bounty?”

“It’s a couple hours by speeder out to where the tracking fob says they are.” Cara said. “If we leave now…”

“I was thinking you should stay with them.” Din said. 

Cara raised an eyebrow. “Is that necessary?” 

“I should be able to handle this myself, and I’d feel better if they had prote-” Din stopped himself as Teryn glared and Cara frowned at him. “If she had some back up.” 

“I see.” Cara and Teryn exchanged glances. “You know this means we’re gonna shit-talk you all day, right?”

Din sighed, then handed Teryn a handful of credits. “Either here or Canto Bright, see if you can find any… sturdier… toys he can share.” She nodded. It was a good idea. 

Teryn grinned at Cara. “What’s the shopping like around here?” 

After Din set off, with admonishments to be careful for fuck’s sake and several keldabe kisses from Jha’iil, the three of them set off for the market. Teryn frowned at her lists and was mentally calculating what she could possibly afford. 

“What are we looking for?”

“A lot of foodstuffs- fresh things, if we can find them. Some medical supplies, other things.” Teryn showed Cara the lists and Cara raised her eyebrows. 

“This is a lot for a small group.”

Teryn made a non-commital noise as they turned onto a busier commercial street. “I’ll explain in private.” They paused and made a scan of the crowd, looking for anything that made their hackles go up. 

Teryn nodded at a pharmacy. “Let’s start there. Medicines will be expensive as hell at Canto Bright.” Inside it was small, reasonably well-stocked, but on the shabbier side. Teryn began haggling (“All of these cases are going to expire far before you can move them. If I take it all at for only half of what you’re asking, I’d be doing you a favor”) while Cara kept an eye on the door. 

Once the deal was made, and delivery arranged, Teryn managed to keep her smug swagger to herself until they were out the door and out of sight, but only barely. Cara grinned. “How’d you learn to do that?” 

“Work with enough shoestring medical outfits, and you’d learn, too. We didn’t always have a competent procurement officer, so we all had to make do and learn how to haggle on our own.”

“I wish we’d had people who could do that. There were some in command who clearly thought the drop-troopers were disposable, so we weren’t always as well-equipped as we should have been.”

“I know. We had to put you guys back together as best we could, and we could tell.” 

They both sighed, remembering.

Teryn decided that the food was better gotten in Canto Bright- all those casinos meant there were restaurants, and restaurants meant supply depots, and she could probably charm her way into one of those. Wholesale would be better, at these quantities. “Should we go look for toys, ad’ika?” 

“Hasn’t he given you a name yet, green bean?”

“He has, but I’ll let him tell you.” Teryn looked down at Jha’iil, who looked hopefully at her.

“Kai’tome?” 

“Good idea. Food first.” 

In a small cafe, they got a table in a corner, and while Jha’iil cheerfully drank some soup and (somewhat alarmingly) stripped the meat from some ribs, Cara and Teryn ate their own lunch. 

“How have things been going? They let you in…” Cara counted the weeks in her head. “Last time I saw him was a couple months ago, I think?” 

“They did. It’s been a lot.” Teryn frowned. A lot really had happened since Din and Ordo had come back from that trip. “I...I killed the coward who did this to me. The Covert has moved to join another covert, and that’s been interesting.” Oh, and that other thing. “We saw Gideon.”

Cara swallowed her beer. “You what?”

“He tracked us to Jelucan. We managed to get out before he attacked, but only barely.” Teryn looked down at her hands, and Cara could see the signs of someone not saying something very loudly. “It was…”

“You don’t have to talk about it.” Cara said, gently. “Did you ever find out anything about that man who was asking after you?”

Teryn made a strangled half-laugh. “Yup. He was… he was someone I knew in the war, and was on Panoog… he was working with Gideon in a misguided attempt to save everyone there from being slaughtered to find me.” 

“Oh, shit.” 

“It didn’t work. Any of it. Gideon killed him. He killed everyone.”

Teryn stared down at her food while Cara sat back. There was clearly more to this story, but she wasn’t going to push. “I’m sorry.” 

“Anyway, we found a place to land and.. I don’t know. Things seem to be okay?” Teryn shrugged. “It won’t last, it never does. It’s nice now, though. How have you been?” 

“Not bad. The bounty hunter enforcer gig is interesting, I’ll give it that.” Cara signaled for the waiter to bring them some ice cream. “Is there anything else here that you should get? We should have another couple hours at best.” 

“There’s a few things.” Teryn grabbed Jha’iil to keep him from tumbling out of his seat going after the ice cream. “Seriously, ad’ika, it will be here in thirty seconds. I know patience isn’t always your strongest trait, but come on.”

“Now!” 

“When it gets here. And no,” Teryn covered his hand. “No, you may not make it come faster.” 

Jha’iil growled, but waited until his ice cream put down in front of him, and then went for it face first. Cara laughed and Teryn shook her head. “Now I see why your buir says no ice cream. This is ridiculous and undignified and I am deeply grateful to know exactly how to wind you up.” She grinned at Cara, an actual smile. 

“Let’s get him cleaned up, and finish getting what we can here.” Teryn glanced at Cara. “Are you coming with us to Canto?”

“Yeah, I think I will. Easy enough to get passage back to Navarro from there as anywhere else, and I’ve missed that tin can of a brother of yours.” Jha’iil squawked indignantly. “And you, green bean. Of course I’ve missed you.” 

Teryn had made a decent enough bargain on the medical supplies that she felt she could splurge a little bit on the requested children’s shoes. Sturdier boots that should last through multiple kids passing them down, instead of falling apart before one kid was done with them. 

There were also piles of decent socks, and she grabbed several pairs after spending a lot of time comparing different options. Cara raised an eyebrow. “Those are too big for you, and I know that Mando keeps his socks and boots in good condition. Who are those for?”

Teryn blushed. “Nobody.” She pulled the hood of her poncho up. “Sun’s bright here. Oh look! Toy store! Should we go look at toys, vod’ad?”

“Mmmhmmm.” Cara wasn’t fooled in the least. 

In the toy store, Jha’iil wandered towards the wall of stuffed animals, and Teryn steered him away. “You have _so many_ stuffies. Let’s try something less… rippable.” Jha’iil glanced up at her, frowned, and then nodded. He pointed to a net bag of various sized balls, in multiple colors. 

“Want that.” He looked hopefully up at Teryn and she raised an eyebrow. He sighed. “Pease.” 

Teryn and Cara glanced at each other and grinned. The chaos opportunities for a bunch of balls on the Razor Crest were not small, but, Teryn thought, if he could be convinced that these were the toys he could share with the creche, that would be perfect. Plus the short term chaos could be funny. She bought the balls and Jha’iil trilled happily. The shopkeeper raised his eyebrows at the sight of the little green kid, but said nothing. The fully armed woman at the door was enough to end almost any questions. 

Back at the ship, they waited for the delivery from the pharmacy while Jha’iil played with one of his new balls. It was light and bouncy and he made it float around, bouncing off the walls, and once- exactly once- off Cara’s head. 

Given that they were in private, Cara felt they could go back to more delicate topics. “You said you killed the man who took your helmet?”

Teryn nodded. “Challenged him to a duel and everything.”

“Bad ass.” 

“It was stupid.” Teryn admitted. “It was really stupid and I knew that there was a decent chance he’d win and then..” 

Cara got it in one. “It would be over?”

“But at least I’d’ve made them watch.” Teryn shrugged. “The people in the Covert we joined with are less strict than we are. So they don’t seem to mind my very… existence.” 

“I’d guess not, not if you’re buying _socks_ for someone.” Cara smirked.

Teryn glared. “Shut up.” She was saved from having to deflect any more of this topic by the pharmacy delivery. They’d thrown in some bacta patches as a bonus, which she noticed right away had expired the year before. “Everyone’s got a racket.”

Cara glanced at them. “They still good?” 

“Eh. They’ll work… sort of… for about another year or so. But they’re better than nothing if you need to keep a wound covered. Official expiration dates are always a year or so off of actual expiration- manufacturers make more money that way off the people who can afford it. Those who can’t afford it make do with the cast offs.” 

Cara looked at her chrono. “He should be back soon, assuming things went as planned.”

“Do they ever?”

“Well, once, that I can think of.” Cara waved her hand. “...Sort of.” 

They waited longer, reminiscing over people they’d both known. (“What do you mean he became a bureaucrat? I saw him take down a stormtrooper with his bare hands, I wouldn’t think he’d be able to tolerate New Republic bullshit.”) Jha’iil climbed into Cara’s lap, where he was starting to look anxious.

After another hour, Teryn heated up some food, and looked at Cara as she handed her a bowl. “How long do we go before we start to worry and think about going after him?” 

Cara looked at the door, where there was still no sign of Din, or the speeder. “Now. We start to worry now.” 

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I MISSED CARA
> 
> Mando'a translations
> 
> Alor: Chief  
> Vod'ika: little sister  
> Su cuy: Hi!  
> Kai’tome: FOod  
> ad’ika: child  
> buir: Parent  
> vod'ad: sibling's child


	9. Some I stow forward, an' some I stow aft'ward

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Vod’ad, you’re going to have to be very quiet and very good. Okay? Do exactly what you’re told.” Teryn knelt down. “And I’ll get you the biggest ice cream I can find on Canto Bight, got it?” 
> 
> A rescue mission, some actual conversations, and more shopping.

They had a two-way comm unit, but Cara was reluctant to use it in case it gave away Din’s position. Teryn grumbled that they’d never bothered to rig up anything that would allow her to use the comm unit in his helmet. They always meant to, just… stuff got in the way. 

“I don’t suppose you have a second tracking fob.”

“No, of course not. That would be useful.” Cara grimaced in disgust. “I remember more or less where the target was this morning, so we’ll head in that direction and hope for the best.”

Teryn nodded. She’d been part of worse plans. Cara went to go get another speeder, and Teryn started to loot the weapons cabinet. If nothing else, her ori’vod kept his weapons neat and organized and well-maintained. Tucked into a corner was a vambrace- too small for Din’s arm. Teryn picked it up, frowning. It was the perfect size for her arm. She turned it over in her hands, then set it aside. She’d ask him about that later. 

She reloaded her blaster, pulled out a rifle and several charges. Cara drove up, and Teryn nodded at the weapons locker. “Take your pick.”

Cara’s eyes lit up at getting to play with the best toys again. “You think he's gonna want these back?” She pulled out a heavy blaster rifle and slapped several more charges on her belt. 

“Do we care?”

“Nah.” They both considered Jha’iil. Leaving him alone on the ship was never a great idea. Bringing him along was also not a great idea, but neither one really liked the idea of leaving him. 

“Vod’ad, you’re going to have to be very quiet and very good. Okay? Do exactly what you’re told.” Teryn knelt down. “And I’ll get you the biggest ice cream I can find on Canto Bight, got it?” 

Jha’iil nodded very seriously. He understood _all_ of the stakes. 

They loaded up into the speeder with the weapons and the full medkit, and locked up the Razor Crest- didn’t need anyone stealing the expired bacta patches. Cara set out in the direction Din went that morning, all three of them tense and watchful. 

They drove for nearly an hour, before they saw Din’s speeder off the side of the road, smoking. Cara and Teryn exchanged glances, and Teryn nodded. “I’ll cover you.” 

Cara pulled the speeder up, and turned it broadside to Din’s speeder. She hopped out, and Teryn slid over to the driver’s seat, signalling to Jha’iil to stay down. She aimed her rifle at the speeder as Cara carefully went towards it, rifle at the ready. 

The speeder had clearly run into something- the front end was crumpled, and the windscreen had been shattered. Inside, the bounty was cuffed and unconscious, with blood pouring down his face. Cara looked around for Din, and finally saw him off the side of the road, down in the ditch. He was moving, but not much. 

Cara sighed, and scanned the area again. There was no one in sight, and her instincts were quiet. She looked back at Teryn and signaled that she’d found him. Teryn also scanned the area, and glanced at Jha’iil. The kid was down and quiet, worried, but calm. She shook her head at Cara. _All clear._

“He’s down here!” Cara called. “Might be hurt!” 

Teryn put down her rifle and vaulted out of the speeder, grabbing her med kit. She spared a quick glance at the bounty. “Do we care about him?”

“Not yet.” Teryn slid down into the ditch while Cara kept watch on the road, and Teryn had her med scanner in her hand before she reached his side. 

“What the fuck did you do to yourself.” She scanned him, and he groaned. “Oh good. You’re not dead.” 

“Fuck.”

“Sums it up.” She flipped through the readings. “Gonna have to tell alor that this beskar is some good shit. You have no broken ribs.” She frowned. “What hurts?”

“You tell me.”

“No, shu’shuk. We’ve played this game before, lots of times. What hurts?” 

“Somehow that piece of shit got a blade. Stabbed me in the leg.” He pointed, and she nodded. “I elbowed him in the face, crashed the speeder, went through the windscreen.” He groaned again as she moved his leg to get a look at the wound. “Don’t tell me I should have used the restraints. I know.” 

Cara called from the road, “Is he gonna live?” 

Teryn gave her a thumbs up. “Well, it’s not a vibrobalde, and you’re not gonna bleed out. So that’s good.” Teryn cut away his pants to slap a bandage on it. “Gonna have to do more on board the ship, but this’ll do for now. How’s everything else?”

“Doesn’t feel great.” 

“I bet. I didn’t see any major damage. Can you get up to the road?”

He grunted and struggled to his feet, and Teryn helped him hobble to the speeder. Jha’iil made a very soft, “buir?” But stayed put.

Din sighed. “I’m okay, ad’ika.” He slowly sat down, and sighed. This shouldn’t have been that complicated a job. 

“Kadala?” Jha’iil held up one hand, and Din put his hand over the kid’s.

“Yeah, ad’ika. I’m hurt. But your ba’vodu is gonna take care of it. You don’t have to.” 

Teryn gave him another scan. “Don’t worry, kiddo. He’s gonna be fine.” She called over to Cara, who was looking at the bounty. “How about him?”

“Doesn’t matter.” Din growled. “He can come in warm or cold, isn’t gonna matter what condition he’s in when we freeze him.” 

Cara unceremoniously dumped the bounty in the back of the speeder, and looked at the wrecked one. “Not getting that deposit back.” 

Din snorted. “No, but we’ll check his pockets before we freeze him.” 

Back on the Razor Crest, Cara was able to take it up and plug in the coordinates for Canto- flying wasn’t her strongest skill set, but a simple “take her up, punch out” was doable. It wasn’t the smoothest take off, and there was some yelling back and forth about the hyperdrive, but they got there. 

Teryn attended to Din, watched carefully by Jha’iil. The leg wound needed to be cleaned, and she decided to use some of the new bacta patches- it would be easy to tell quickly if they were effective, and if they weren’t, she was right there and could handle it.

She also gave him pain medication for his back- when he tried to demur, she bellowed that they had ten hours before they got to Canto, there were two adults who could handle pretty much anything, and he needed to get some fucking rest. Jha’iil put an end to the discussion by curling up on his chest and going to sleep. 

Din sighed, and took the meds. Teryn waited until he fell asleep, then climbed up to the cockpit. 

Cara looked up from the instrument panel. “How is he?”

“The gash on his leg should heal fine. He probably wrenched his back flying out of the speeder, but not badly. He’s gonna hurt when he wakes up, though.” 

“Is the yelling part of your bedside manner?” 

Teryn laughed. “It is when the patient is a Mando with a skull harder than duracrete.” 

Cara grinned back. They settled back in silence, and after a while Teryn realized she still had the poncho on, and pulled it off. Cara raised an eyebrow. “Is that…”

“Mandalorian armor? Yeah.” Teryn looked down at it. “Alor remade mine and said I could wear it.” 

“How has it been going? Really?” 

Teryn took a deep breath and considered her words carefully. “It’s been hard. They were grateful that I came, and parts of it have been good, but… it’s still hard.” She looked out at the hyperspace lights. “A lot has happened.” 

“Gideon?”

“Gideon… his troopers caught me while I was out of the covert, which was… stupid. But if I hadn’t been then we wouldn’t have had the warning of the attack, so… Obviously, I got away, but I didn’t expect to survive it.” Teryn sighed, and Cara let the silence be. “It was pretty bad.” 

“Sounds like it.” Cara cocked her head. “Can I ask about the socks?”

Teryn blushed. “...there’s a… when you last saw him-” she nodded down the ladder, “- he and our other warrior found a pair of Mando’ade on the losing side of a fight and brought them home. And one of them… he’s…” She gestured helplessly. 

“Mmmhmmm.” 

“He calls me cyar’ika, which means… well, it means ‘beloved’ or ‘sweetheart’.” 

“What do you call him?” 

“...I-” Teryn frowned. The truth was, she didn’t call him anything. She didn’t use his name, of course (That would be appallingly rude), nor had she given him any sort of nickname or use-name, or used any endearment. 

“And you bought him socks.”

“Well, his socks are a disaster. Mismatched and patched and that’s no way to go through life.” 

Cara raised her eyebrows and gave a little half shrug. _If you say so._ “You and your brother are very similar in a lot of ways.”

After another round of silence, Teryn said, “You can go down and get some shut-eye, if you want.”

“What about you?”

“I’ll be fine.” 

Cara narrowed her eyes. “Somehow I doubt that.” 

“I don’t sleep well anymore, so...” _At least not alone._ “Go ahead. I’ll wake you up in a few hours if it makes you feel better.” Cara looked at her for a long minute, then shrugged and went down into the hold. Din was still asleep, along with the little green bean. She settled down into a corner and nodded off, secure in the knowledge that if something happened, Teryn would wake her up. Trusted comrades were the rarest element in the galaxy. 

Teryn allowed herself to doze off in the hypnotic glow of hyperspace. Never deep enough to slip into dreams. Even discounting the lack of comfort of the pilot's chair, she just didn’t feel safe enough to sleep. 

She missed Cuan. A lot. Hopefully, she hadn’t ruined _everything_. 

Several hours later, Jha’iil woke up. His buir was still asleep, which, he decided, was good. He considered using his powers to heal him, but his buir had told him no, and as it wasn’t a dire situation, he would listen. For now. His Cara was asleep in the corner, and he could tell his ba’vodu was up where the buttons and the lights were.

He clambered up the ladder, where his ba’vodu was sitting in the big chair, and he climbed up in her lap. She wrapped an arm around him and he snuggled in his favorite spot under her chin. He hummed, and she hummed back. “Are you hungry?”

“No.” He scooted down, against her cuirass. “Laar?” He’d learned that she couldn’t sing for him if his head was right under her chin.

“There were three galaar sat on a tree,  
Downe a downe, hay downe, a downe,  
They were as black as they might be.  
With a downe, downe, downe”

Jha’iil hummed along. He liked to feel her singing with his head against her armor- the vibrations were nice. 

Teryn looked over the readings. Another few hours to Canto, and then the fun would begin again. “Lets go wake up your buir and see how he’s doing, okay?”

Down in the hold, Din was just starting to wake up, and at Taryn’s boots hitting the deck, Cara woke up as well. Teryn put Jha’iil down and went to Din’s side. “How are you feeling?”

“Stiff, but not bad.” 

She looked at the knife wound, and nodded. The expired bacta was still working, if a bit slow. The scan showed nothing unexpected. “Cara’s gonna go with you to turn in the bounty.”

“Fine, then you’ll…”

“Take the kid and finish the rest of the shopping.” Teryn nodded. 

“I was going to say ‘stay here’.” 

“I know what you were going to say. I’m telling you what’s going to happen.” 

Cara grinned. “She’s right, Mando.” 

Din grumbled. He did not like being outnumbered. “Will you two go up so I can deal with… things?” 

Cara and Teryn both went up to the cockpit, and Cara raised an eyebrow at Teryn. “You can’t see his face either?”

“No, it’s parents and children only. Even if I wasn’t… Even _if,_ I wouldn’t be allowed to. I haven’t seen his face since he swore the Creed at 14.” Teryn snorted back a laugh. “It’s something to have your last memory of someone’s face be a spotty 14 year old.” 

“That’s…”

“This is the Way.” Teryn said, automatically. 

“It’s weird. I wouldn’t tell him that, but I’ll tell you. It’s weird.” 

Teryn shrugged. _Well, it’s one of the Ways._

They landed in Canto at spaceport that wasn’t too fancy, but not too shady, either. It wasn’t far from the more commercial part of the city, where Teryn expected to be able to find the food supplies she was looking for, nor was it too far from where Din and Cara needed to deliver the bounty. 

Cara went to hire a speeder- no need to drag the carbonite block through the city streets, and besides, she had an expense account- and Teryn looked over her lists again. Jha’iil happily climbed into the carrying sling and only grumbled a little at having to have his head covered. 

“Canto’s a shady place, vod’ad. We don’t know who might see you, but it’s better than leaving you alone.” 

Din held up his comm unit, and Teryn held up hers. “I’ll comm you when we’re on our way back. K’oyacyi.”

Teryn nodded. “You, too. Don’t do anything dumb.” 

Cara grinned. “I won’t let him.”

“No, you’ll help him.” Teryn waved them off, and headed towards a supply store that a quick holonet search had suggested. On her way, she passed by a food stall that had some amazing smelling stew- she made a note for later. 

Once she found the store, she took a deep breath. There was a lot she needed, and it wouldn’t do to look too eager. They had almost everything- fresh and frozen meat in enormous quantities, barrels of all kinds of flour, fruits and vegetables. Everything but spices. Well, that could be handled later. 

She walked through, nodding. The posted prices were a bit high, but she could work with it. 

“Hello! How can we help you today?”

The person who came to help was a human, slight and reedy. She smiled, going for “pleasant and non-threatening.” She had the poncho on again, of course, and deliberately relaxed her stance. “I have a big order I’m looking to fill. Looks like I can get almost everything I need here.” She showed him a version of the list. 

“Oh, well, this is significant… lets see…” 

They began to debate over the prices and quantities in earnest. (“No, I won’t pay 5 credits a kilo for that, look at the leaves, they’re about to go bad. I won’t pay more than 3.” “Madam, that is an insult to the quality of my goods!” “That is an insult to the quality of my eyes and nose.”) (“I can’t possibly let you take less than 100 kilos of this flour.” “But I only _need_ 50 kilos. If you can substitute 20 kilos with that flour, and drop the price by 30%, then I’ll take it.”) (“No one here is really going to take this freeze dried nerf jerky. It’s just going to sit taking up space, and you’re gonna be annoyed every time you look at it. Let me do you a solid and take it off your hands.”) (“I have to take a minimum of five kilos of yeast? Okay, but…”) 

Finally, after nearly an hour of haggling, they arrived at a deal that made them both happy. She arranged for delivery later in the day, and implied heavily that a decent tip was in order. “Now, where can I get spices?” Jha’iil made a quiet sigh from inside the carrier. She gave him a pat. “And ice cream.” 

The reedy man directed her to a shop not far away that had barrels and barrels of spices and herbs, and he told her, the prices were much better there than in any other establishment in the city. The smell was intoxicating, and she took a deep breath and hummed in pleasure. She was getting hetikles- noseburn- from the smell alone. Jha’iil made a small sound of dismay- he didn’t like spicy things very much. 

There were some things that were not even worth thinking about at all, she just _needed_ them. Hu’ldi, three kinds of shi’mla mirch, iyaalachii. Lash’uun and sont, fresh and dried. They weren’t called by those names here, of course, but she could recognize them. Any Mandalorian could.

In the end, she had a bulging carry sack full of packets of spices, and then looked at a small barrel of sont root. A decent amount of it was clearly about to go off. “How much for that?”

“For how much of it?”

“The whole thing.” 

In the end, they threw it in for free, and offered to bring it back to the ship for her. She had to keep the smug swagger to herself, but the shopping had been beyond successful. Under budget, got everything asked for and then some, and now the question was… how to fit it all into the ship? 

There was an ice cream shop near the spaceport, and as promised, she got Jha’iil a big serving, nearly the size of his head, and she let him peek out of the carrier and pick his toppings. The delivery kid from the spice shop waited amiably while this very important purchase was made. The hardest part was keeping the kid quiet until they got back to the ship and the barrel of sont was stowed. He wanted his ice cream, and it was _right there._

They still had a little time before the big delivery was expected, so Teryn did what any reasonable adult faced with an overexcited small child and a large amount of ice cream would do- she took off Jha’iil’s clothes and let him go after it naked. She figured he would be easier to clean up that way. 

Jha’iil happily went to town on the ice cream-his second in less than two days! When the food delivery arrived, he had done as much damage as he could to it, and was wandering about in a sugar fueled daze, slowly bouncing off the walls, waddling with a VERY full belly. 

Teryn was pretty sure she was going to be in trouble for that. She put him in the sleeping compartment, and hoped he would be quiet. 

She was in the midst of having the food supplies stowed, when the comm unit blared and Din said they were on their way back, and there was a horrible sound of retching from the sleeping compartment. 

“I should have seen that coming.” She muttered to herself. There was nothing to do about it until everything had been stowed and the delivery drivers sent on their way- and she needed to check that everything she’d paid for was on that delivery, that it all got on the ship and what needed to be put in the cooling unit made it. All of that needed to be handled before she went to see whatever disaster waited in the sleeping compartment. 

If there was a chance that she could get it cleaned up before Din and Cara got back, that would be ideal. 

The timing was not ideal. They pulled up just as the delivery driver was leaving and she was stowing the last of the cargo. Cara whistled and Din looked around. “Is there anything left on this planet that you didn’t buy?” 

Teryn shrugged. “It was the list. Did things go smoothly?” 

“More or less.” 

“Which was it? More, or less?” 

“We got paid.” Din sat down, groaning slightly, and Teryn raised an eyebrow. “Might have had a little fight, but nothing major. Where’s my kid?” Teryn nodded at the sleeping compartment, and Din cocked his head. “Why do you look guilty?” 

“Well….”

Din opened the sleeping compartment to find Jha’iil curled in a ball on the pillow, and a splash of brightly colored goo all over the end of the bed and on the floor. Din sighed, and Jha’iil opened one eye, ears flat against his head. “Sick.” 

Cara put a hand over her mouth to hide her smile. “How big was that ice cream?”

“...the size of his head.” Din turned around and glared, and Teryn held up her hands. “He was so good all day, and yesterday, and I promised him!” 

They got the sleeping compartment mostly cleaned up, and Teryn offered to go get food from the stall she’d noticed earlier in the day. “It smelled so good, and it’s real food. You really want to eat a ration bar? Come on.” 

Din grumbled, but real food did sound good, and a little bit more time to let Jha’iil’s stomach sort itself out seemed like a good idea as well. Teryn bounced out into the early evening, excited to see if the food stall was as good as it smelled. 

The kitchen was closed off, but there was a man at the counter. Teryn perused the menu, and grinned. They had a stew that could be ordered to various levels of spiciness. “Two bowls as spicy as you can make it, and one mild.”

“As spicy as we can make it is very spicy, lady. Are you quite sure?” 

“Oh, yes. Yes I am.” Teryn glanced at the menu. “And some of those rolls, and the nuggets. To go.” 

She brought the food back, and handed Din his bowl, along with the nuggets. “In case he gets hungry.” She and Cara sat down outside the open hatch, letting Din and Jha’iil have the space inside to eat. 

The first bite was heaven. Properly spicy, layered, causing a tingle in the sinuses without overwhelming. Teryn closed her eyes in pleasure from the draluram, even as Cara started to cough. “What is this?”

“I got you mild.” Teryn took a bite of Cara’s just to make sure she hadn’t mixed up the bowls. “No, that’s mild.” 

“This is _mild_? What did you get?”

“As spicy as they’d make it. It’s amazing. It's perfect. It….” Teryn paused. “Ori’vod?” 

Din finished her thought. “It tastes like home.” She heard him put his helmet on and come out. “Where did you get this?” 

“Food stall down the road.” Teryn shoved another bite in her mouth and stood up.

“Where are you going?”

“To find out who made this.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Three Ravens (A happier version of Twa Corbies): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NmzYmLNAQ3k
> 
> Can you guess that there's been a part of pandemic related food shopping that's involve coordinating how to split up 80 pounds of chicken and 50 pounds of flour, between 5 people, because we can get it at goo prices at restauraunt supply stores? 
> 
> Write what you know, indeed.
> 
> Mando'a translations
> 
> ori’vod: Older sibling  
> Vod’ad: sibling's child  
> alor: chief  
> shu’shuk: disaster  
> buir: parent  
> ad’ika: child  
> Kadala: Hurt  
> ba’vodu: Parent's sibling  
> Laar: sing  
> K’oyacyi: 1. *Cheers!* 2. Can also mean: *Hang in there* or 3. *Come back safely.* Literally, a command; *Stay alive!*  
> hetikles: *noseburn* - burning sensation in the sinuses brought about by specific spices - Mandalorians prize this  
> draluram: vivid - used only of food, to indicate strong, distinct flavour, lit. *bright mouth* - one of the four essentials of Mandalorian cooking
> 
> Spice names (I made this up using Hindi words for actual spices)
> 
> Hu’ldi: tumeric  
> shi’mla mirch: paprika  
> iyaalachii: cardamom  
> Lash’uun: Garlic  
> sont: ginger


	10. The only thing that's real

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Teryn narrowed her eyes, leaned one arm on the counter, and dropped her voice by half an octave. “I want. To talk. To the cook.”
> 
> Going home can be complicated.

Din and Cara watched Teryn vanish out of the spaceport. Cara raised her eyebrows. Din shrugged. “It tastes like it was made by a Mandalorian.”

“Is that possible?”

“Anything is possible.” Din sat down and grunted. Turning in the bounty had been uncomplicated- the client had cheerfully paid everything he’d promised and then threw in some extra when told that the bounty had been alive when frozen. Din didn’t really want to think about what would happen when the bounty was unfrozen, but also he didn’t care. 

It was the drunk casino patrons that decided to take their chances with a Mandalorian and a heavily armed shocktrooper that really made the day go from “fine” to “annoying.” Sure, if he hadn’t been stabbed and hadn't gone through a speeder windscreen, it might have even been a little fun, but he was still stiff and aching. It was just annoying. 

It hadn’t taken long to deal with them, but one of them did smash a chair over his back, and he did throw one through a window (It was hardly his fault that the window was twenty stories up, was it?). His back was complaining at the effort, and sitting and eating a decent meal had sounded good after that, so he didn’t argue with his vod’ika on that score.

Plus letting the sleeping compartment air out a bit more after the Unfortunate Ice Cream Incident was a good idea. 

So letting Teryn run off to find the cook before they headed back seemed like a good call. 

“How you feeling there, buddy?”

“Like I got hit with a chair after going headfirst through a windscreen.” 

Cara chuckled.

“Do you need to head back to Navarro right away?” 

“No.” Cara took another bite of the allegedly mild stew. It _was_ good, and her sinuses would be clear for the next month. 

“After we get all this dropped off, I’m probably going to be back on the job. Want to come along?” 

“Is that allowed?” Cara asked.

Din shrugged. “Alor knows you, we’ll work it out with the others.” 

Teryn didn’t realize that she was projecting a terrifying determined energy until she noticed the third person decide to cross the street to get out of her path. She hit the control for the door to the food stall with a bit more aggression that was truly called for, and stalked in. The man at the counter looked up and held his hands up defensively, “Lady, you asked for spicy!” 

“Yes, I did.” She looked behind him. “I want to talk to the cook.” 

“No one talks to the cook.” He looked nervously at the door to the kitchen. 

Teryn narrowed her eyes, leaned one arm on the counter, and dropped her voice by half an octave. “I want. To talk. To the cook.”

The man swallowed nervously, and flicked his eyes at the door again. She let out a breath, gave him a slightly feral smile. He backed up until he was pressed flat against the wall. She locked the door to the outside, and went to the entrance to the kitchen. “Come here.” she nodded at the door, with her hand on her blaster. “Open it.” 

He slowly walked forward, and gave a quick series of knocks on the door. “You have to wait until he opens it.” 

There was a grunt from the other side of the door, and the door opened. She nodded and smiled at the counterman. “Thank you. You’re closed for the day.” He sank down to his knees as she stepped through the door, hand on her blaster- just in case. 

In the kitchen, at the stove, with his back to her, was a fully armored and helmeted Mandalorian- or at least, it was someone wearing Mandalorian armor. “What is it, Rhys?”

“Su cuy’gar, vod.” At the sound of Mando’a, he froze, and she continued, “Me’vaar ti gar?”

He let out a breath, and whispered, “Naas,” and turned around. She couldn’t be sure if she recognized him or not, and she could tell from the way he tilted his head at her that he didn’t recognize her. “Who are you?” His voice was slightly shaky. 

“I’m…” she paused. She hadn’t really thought this all the way through. “I know what home tastes like. I had to see if- What are you doing here?”

“Needed a job. This is what I’m good at.” He reached behind to the stove and turned the burners down. 

“Yeah. Yeah, you are. We recognized it. Where are you from?”

“Doesn’t matter. My covert was attacked. They’re all gone.” 

She cocked her head. His accent _did_ sound familiar. “Was it Navarro?”

He sat down. “You know Navarro?”

She nodded and smiled in recognition. This was Kreez, and the Armorer was going to be thrilled. “They’re not all gone. Some survived.” 

“The Foundlings?”

“All of them made it. Some others. We can take you.”

“Who _are_ you?” 

She took a deep breath, and took off the poncho. He took a deep breath at the sight of her armor, and she reached into one of the pouches on her belt where she kept the mythosaur amulet. She still didn’t feel comfortable wearing it, but it was still something she needed with her, and she held it out to him. “Come home, vod.” 

He took it and ran his fingers over it, then he looked up at her. “I didn’t betray my oath.”

She nodded. “I know. Don’t you think I can tell when someone has lost their soul?” She put a hand on his arm- on the vambrace he still wore. “Come _home_ , vod.” 

It didn’t take any more convincing. He packed up his knives and a few other things from the room he had behind the food stand, and followed her back to the space port. She still had a face like thunder, didn’t put the poncho back on, and being followed by a Mandalorian made Teryn even more intimidating. 

He stopped at the sight of the Razor Crest. “Is that… the beroya?”

“Yes.”

“He lived.”

Teryn consciously stilled her face. “Yes.” 

Din and Cara were waiting at the hatch, and she could tell that Din recognized him from the way he stood up. “Skraan’ur?” 

“Beroya.” They clasped each other’s forearms and thumped each other’s helmets, and Cara sidled over to Teryn. 

“Who’s this?”

“The cook from the covert on Navarro. I don’t know how he got here, but he’s coming home with us.” Cara nodded, her throat suddenly a bit thick.

They got on the ship. Jha’iil had fallen asleep in a post-sugar high coma, and Din looked at the ladder up to the cockpit. It seemed like a lot to ask of his body to climb up there, much less climb down. “Vod’ika, can you handle it? Cara can’t know the coordinates.” 

“She’s coming with us?” At Din’s nod, Teryn smiled. “Yeah, I can get us out.” She climbed up, and Din turned to the skraan’ur. He’d assumed that Kreez Vac had been killed in the attack- he didn’t ask about the people missing, and no one had mentioned any chance that Kreez had survived. 

“How did you end up here?”

Kreez looked at Cara, and Din nodded. _You can trust her._ “I was off-world when I got the message that the Covert was under attack and not to return. My ship was.. Well, it was a piece of crap before and it pretty much fell apart. I drifted around for a while… how long has it been?”

“Almost a year.” 

“I ended up here a couple months ago- the guys at that food stall needed a cook, the last one disappeared. So I did that.”

The ship jolted as they made the jump to hyperspace, and Teryn climbed down. With the four people, the very full hold was snug. Din sat down, and she eyed him narrowly. “You don’t look great.” 

Cara blew out her nose, and muttered something that sounded like “How can you tell?” and Din sighed. 

“I feel pretty fucking stiff.” Teryn nodded and got out her medscanner. 

“It’ll be about 12 hours. You should try to rest, ori’vod.”

Kreez made a choking sound. “I just realized- you’re the al’baar’ur who... that, uh…” he stopped, unsure about what to say. 

She glanced at him over her shoulder. “Yeah. That’s me.” 

Cara threw up her hands. “You people and your refusal to use names! It’s annoying and frustrating!” 

All three Mandalorians looked at her, and Din said, “You get used to it.” 

“Do you?” Cara said in a tone that implied that she did not believe that for a second.

Teryn shrugged. “I don’t even _know_ alor’s name.” Kreez and Din both thought about that for a second, and both shook their heads. They didn’t, either. 

Teryn handed Din some painkillers. “These won’t knock you out, but they should help.” He nodded, and went to the sleeping compartment to check on Jha’iil, and take the meds in privacy. Teryn sat down next to the barrel of sont root and opened it. 

Kreez picked one up and made a sound of disgust. “I hope you didn’t pay for these.”

“I didn’t. Got ‘em for free.” 

He dug further through the barrel. “I wouldn’t feed these to an auretii I didn’t like.” 

“Of course not. You’d feed them the really good shit and then they’d _die_.” Teryn took the root from his hand. “I got these to make a salve for joints and stiff muscles. Mix it in with a cream, and it works pretty great.” 

He huffed, impressed. “Smart. Wouldn’t have thought of that.”

She smiled a bit, and started cutting around the rotting parts of the roots. “That’s why I’m the al’baar’ur, and you’re not.” 

He sat down and began to help. “I don’t even know where to start.” 

“With all of this? There’s a lot.” Teryn glanced at Cara before continuing. “The Covert has moved a couple of times since Navarro, and now we more or less moved in with another Covert.” 

“Oh?” 

“They’re a lot more relaxed, so… don’t be freaked out when you see people without helmets.” 

Cara made a rude sound. “Do they use names?”

“Actually, yes. Pisses them off that none of us have shared ours.” Teryn grinned. 

Kreez nodded, then looked at Cara. “Narudar?” _Is she a temporary ally?_

Teryn narrowed her eyes and sat up straight, just as Din came out of the sleeping compartment. “Nayc. Burc’ya.” she snapped. _No, she is a friend, fuck you very much._ Kreez held up his hands. _Okay, okay._

Cara looked at Din. “Are they talking about me?”

“He asked if you were a temporary ally, and she said no, you were a friend.” Din looked at Kreez. “I trust her with my Foundling and my aliit and my life.” 

Kreez tilted his head at Din. “A Foundling? Since when do you have a Foundling? Is he with the Covert?” 

“It’s a long story, but he’s currently sleeping off an ice cream induced coma.” Din nodded at the sleeping compartment, then shot a glare at Teryn. She shrugged, unrepentant. 

“We’re not going anywhere for awhile.” So Din told him an abridged version of the story, including the part where the Covert was attacked because of his actions. Kreez murmured the remembrance of the dead, and bowed his head. After a minute, he looked up at Teryn. “Do you still sing? I remember you used to sing.” 

Teryn nodded and Cara started to say something, then stopped. Teryn raised a questioning eyebrow, and Cara said, softly. “You would sing in the medical wards.” 

Teryn nodded. “It seemed to help, sometimes.” 

“There was one you sang after Jakku. It was from Alderaan.” Cara swallowed. “Can you... will you sing it again?” Teryn tilted her head very slightly. _Are you sure?_ “Please.” 

"Of all the money that e'er I had  
I spent it in good company  
And of all the harm that e'er I done  
Alas it was to none but me  
For all I've done for want of wit  
To memory now I can't recall  
So fill to me the parting glass  
Good night and joy be with you all  
  
Of all the comrades that e'er I had  
They're sorry for my going away  
And of all the sweethearts that e'er I had  
They'd wish me one more day to stay  
But as it falls unto my lot  
That I must go and you must not  
I gently rise and I'll softly call  
Good night and joy be with you all"

Cara leaned back against the bulkhead and closed her eyes, letting the sounds of her home wash over her.

Din was feeling loose enough to climb up to the cockpit to bring the Razor Crest down into the Covert. Kreez had fallen asleep over the sont roots, but had twitched alarmingly when Din had tried to take the knife from his hand. Jha’iil had slept through most of the trip, and after waking up, had contented himself with drawing on the cooling unit with his markers. Din had shrugged and decided there were worse things for him to be doing. 

He and Cara had talked quietly- he filled her in on everything that had happened- everything. She listened patiently. “There’s gotta be someone who can help with this sorcery shit. There were stories I heard as a kid about Jedi, like your chief mentioned, but…” She shrugged. “They vanished when I was little and then people just… stopped talking about them.”

“Can you try to remember anything else?”

Cara sighed and rubbed her face. “I don’t like to go back there, but… for you, and for him, I’ll try.” 

Teryn had gone up to the cockpit after Kreez fell asleep, and fitfully dozed off and on. She woke up completely when they jolted out of Hyperspace. “Ge yaim’ol?” _Almost home?_

“Yes.” Din looked at her sharply. “Have you slept at all on this trip?” 

“A little.” 

Din snorted in disbelief. 

“Thank you for taking me along. It was kinda fun.”

Din grunted. “You need to put back my guns when we land.” 

Paz was waiting for them when they landed- Din and Teryn exchanged a slightly worried glance. Din had decided that asking forgiveness regarding Cara was better than asking permission, and Teryn hoped that bringing home Kreez and everything they’d been sent out to get would be enough of a sweetener that they wouldn’t get into too much trouble. So they hadn’t mentioned either. But Paz being the first one to see them wasn’t ideal. 

Din opened the back gangway first, then the side hatch. Teryn walked out first, and Paz glared. “You’re late.”

“No, we’re not.”

“You were told to let us know if you were going to be more than two standard days. You’re two hours late.” 

“Sorry, but-” Teryn jerked her chin at the ship. “I think you’ll like what we found.” 

Paz looked and drew in a breath at Kreez. “Fuck me.” Kreez slowly came down the gangplank. “Where did you find him?” 

“Canto fucking Bight.” Paz made a sound of disgust. 

Kreez approached Paz. “Al’verde.” 

“Olarom yaim, vod.” Paz clasped Kreez’s arm. “Su cuy’gar. We tried to send a message to you… we assumed the worst.” 

“You too.” Kreez’s shoulders dropped visibly. “I didn’t get them. I didn’t know anyone had survived.” 

“Alor will be relieved- what the fuck!” 

Din had followed Kreez out, closely trailed, by Cara, who was holding Jha’iil. Din was known to be one of the most protective buir the Tribe had ever seen, so allowing an auretii to hold his Foundling was a signal that he trusted her above most. 

That fact did not calm Paz down much. He whirled on Teryn. “Who the fuck-” 

Teryn had spotted Cuan and Rima crossing the compound towards the ship, and saw the Armorer coming from the direction of the Navarro covert’s building. She turned a glare on Paz. “Can you not be a shabuir for like, five and a half minutes? Would you die if you did?” He clenched a fist and she bared her teeth. “Can we find out?” 

He threw a punch and she dodged, just as the Armorer bellowed “AL’VERDE.”

Din snapped “VOD’IKA. I told you not to pick fights.”

“That’s still in effect?” Teyrn blinked innocently. 

Din sighed. “Go. Please. Just. Go.” 

Teryn gave Paz a completely unrepentant grin and went to meet Cuan and Rima, and Din turned to the Armorer. “Alor, you remember Carasynthia Dune.”

“Indeed I do.” The Armorer nodded at Cara. “It is good to see you again in less dire circumstances.” Cara nodded back, and the Armorer continued. “Will you be staying long?” 

“I will be leaving again with him… the beroya, is that the word? As soon as he is ready.” 

Paz growled, but stayed silent after the Armorer shot him another look, and then she turned her attention to Kreez. “It is good to see you. Olarom yaim.”

Kreez sank to his knees, clutching the Armorer’s hands in his. “I didn’t think I’d see any of you again.” 

Teryn spared Rima a nod, but Rima could tell she only had eyes for Cuan. “We got everything you asked for, alor, and then some.” She handed Rima the datapad with the breakdown of what each covert’s share of the spoils were. 

Cuan held himself back, and looked towards the Razor Crest. Rima rolled her eyes, and looked at the datapad. “You got spices?” Teryn nodded, still only looking at Cuan with relief shaded with wariness. Rima looked between them both and rolled her eyes again. “Who came with you?”

“A friend of my ori- of the beroya’s.” 

“Who’s the verd?” Cuan’s voice was just slightly strained. 

“We found our tribe’s skraan’ur. Brought him home.” 

Rima nodded and with another sigh at the two of them, headed towards the Razor Crest. Teryn and Cuan stared at each other for another long, long minute before she swallowed, “How’s my cat?”

“He’ll be happy to see you. He missed you.”

She nodded. “I missed him, too.” She took a breath, about to say something else, then stopped. He frowned, and she reached into the bag she was carrying. “I got you something.” She handed him the socks. He frowned and took them, and in a rush, she said, “I noticed yours were a mess, so I thought that maybe you could use some…I’m sorry, It was a dumb thought.” She moved to take them and he stopped her hand.

“Thank you.” He tilted his head, thumb brushing against her knuckles. “You look tired.” 

“I didn’t sleep well.” She admitted. “I think I’d like to try a nap.” She started in the direction of his rooms, and felt her stomach completely bottom out when he stopped her. 

“No, not-” 

“Oh.” He’d changed his mind. Two days (and two hours) away was enough to make him realize how big a mess she was, that he was wrong, and he’d changed his mind. She _had_ ruined everything. “Oh, I’m… I’ll…” She stepped back, trying not to let how shattered she felt show on her face. 

He shook his head, “Cyar’ika, no.. oh shit, no. I just…” he stepped forward and pressed his forehead to the top of her head, finally burying his fingers and his nose into her hair. “No, I just… I moved rooms. Well, I mean... _we_ moved rooms.” 

“What?” She pulled back and looked at him, completely hating the tears threatening in her eyes. This was ridiculous and a completely outsized reaction to… anything, really. 

“Follow me.” He took her hands and led her towards another building. “Rima wanted to know if I wanted to move into Arkil’s rooms. Atriu moved into the barracks, since she’s now taken the Creed, and it was bigger, and since…” 

“Bigger.” she mumbled, trying to keep up with him. 

“Right, well… I thought…” He opened a door. His things, and the few of hers she had left in his rooms, were haphazardly stacked in a sitting room that was easily twice the size of his old one. She could see two sleeping rooms, and a refresher, and a small kitchen unit in the corner. The only thing that looked deliberately placed was a basket with a blanket, set carefully in front of the heating unit, and Atin was curled up in there. At the sight of Teryn, he made a happy yowl and climbed up to his favorite perch on her shoulder. 

“I know it’s a mess, but thought I should wait until you got back so we could set it up together, so it’s not just mine, but ours.” 

She looked around, swallowing hard. “I…” She reached up and gave Atin a scratch around the ears. “You have a basket for him.” 

“Well, he needed a place.” He traced down a braid. “Do you like it?” 

“Ours.” She looked around, and looked at him, anxious. “You didn’t change your mind.” 

“No, cyar’ika. I didn’t.” he continued to trace the pattern of her braid. “You got me socks.” 

“Yours are a disaster, and it’s bad for your feet.” He reached behind her head to cup the back of her skull, and Atin made a disgruntled sound and leapt down off her shoulder and darted out the door. “And a verd is only as good as his feet.” 

“You didn’t change your mind.” 

She shook her head. “No. No I didn’t.” 

“You came back.” He whispered it, as if putting too much volume to what he’d been afraid of would make it real and scare her away. 

“Well,” she looked down towards the basket again. “My cat is here.” She reached up to trace the kar’ta beskar in the center of his cuirass with her fingertips. “Ner ruus olar.” _My rock is here._ “Everything I care about is here.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are about a million version of The Parting Glass, but I was specifically thinking of Hozier's version: https://youtu.be/zufPTLuShCU
> 
> Kreez showed up in what was supposed to just be a one-shot, Form of Curry, but I couldn't just leave him like that. I have plans of expanding on his adventures between FoC and how he ended up on Canto. https://archiveofourown.org/works/23123623
> 
> There is no official word for cook in Mando'a, so I invented it by using the same construction as "medic" which is "baar" (body) plus "ur." Cook is "skraan" (food) plus "ur." (So, "one who does the body" and "one who does the food.") This language is FUN. 
> 
> Mando'a translations 
> 
> Su cuy’gar: Hello - lit. *You're still alive.*  
> Vod: brother, comrade  
> Me’vaar ti gar: How are you? (Lit: what's new with you?) Can also be used to ask a soldier for a sitrep. If a Mando asks you this, they expect an answer; it's literal.. The response for *I'm fine thanks,* is *Naas.* (Literally - nothing. )  
> beroya: Bounty hunter  
> Skraan’ur: Cook  
> al’baar’ur: Doctor  
> alor: chief  
> auretii: Outsider  
> aliit: Family, clan  
> yaim’ol: return, homecoming  
> Olarom yaim: Welcome home  
> shabuir: extreme insult - *jerk*, but much stronger  
> Al’verde: Commander  
> verd: soldier  
> Cyar’ika: Sweetheart, beloved


	11. Stand up every time I hit the ground

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rising phoenixes and ne'tra gal. There's flying and there's drinking but fortunately, not together.

Cara watched Teryn go towards the man and the woman coming towards the Razor Crest, and then a brief exchange that looked awkward as hell, even from the distance. “That must be socks.” 

Din glanced over, and made a grumble. “Yes, that’s her…. Yes. He’s hers.” 

Cara nodded, and watched them go off, and looked down at Jha’iil. “Do we like him?” Jha’iil nodded. They did. They liked him a lot, and not just because he made his beloved ba’vodu happy. He was good and kind and brave. 

Din and Rima and Paz went over the supplies they brought in, while Cara stood out of the way. The Armorer came to stand next to her. “I see it was a successful journey.” 

Cara nodded. “It was. Although he should have a few days. Before going out again.” 

The Armorer hummed in agreement. “I can see.” She looked down at Jha’iil, and touched an ear. “And you, ad’ika? Did you have fun?” Jha’iil trilled and babbled a long string, ending with a raspberry and a sigh. 

Cara stifled a laugh. “Someone learned a lesson about eating and ice cream the size of his head. Whether it was him or T- or… her, I don’t know yet.” 

The Armorer laughed. It was a pleasant, rolling sound. “Oh, ad’ika, that is a lesson.” She tilted her head at Cara. “You know her name.” 

“Yes, we knew… of each other before. During the war, and she told me when we met a few months ago.” 

The Armorer nodded. “You may use it here.”

Cara narrowed her eyes. “She told me she doesn’t like people using her name.” 

The Armorer gave a nod, and said nothing more. Cara gave her a side-eyed glance, but kept her peace. 

For the moment. 

Teryn had kept track of which covert had asked for what supplies, and made notations indicating what was supposed to go to which covert. She had even included a rudely-worded notation that the barrel of cut up sont root was to go to the med bay, but no one knew why. 

Paz and Rima had called the oldest of the Foundlings and the Herd to help move all the supplies to the proper areas. They’d begun training together, but things were still cool and wary between the two groups. They hadn’t socialized outside of training, and only barely then. 

At least there hadn’t been any more fights. 

Rima hadn’t wanted to push the issue, but it felt undeniably awkward to her that this group of people lived just across the way, and wouldn’t mix. But the children had all finished the spring cleaning in just over a week, with minimal fuss, and no broken bones. Things were looking up. And the arrival of the supplies (more than she expected- she honestly hadn’t thought they’d be able to get everything on the list), with credits left over, the joining of two tribes, plus the return of one of the Navarro people who they thought was marching far away?

It was worthy of a celebration. 

There were eleven trainees between the two tribes that ranged from the age of 11 to 13. Eight of them were from Samaki, and they’d been training in the Rising Phoenix regularly. The three Foundlings from Navarro hadn’t had much opportunity. Occasionally, if the Talon was around, Paz and the al’verde bajur would take them out for a day or two of intensive training, but it wasn’t much. Once they had arrived on Jelucan, they hadn’t wanted to risk it at all. 

The al’verde bajurs of each Tribe decided that it would be good to integrate their older training classes, especially when it came to jetpacks. The Navarro Foundlings had a lot of catching up to do. 

Kewe, the al’verde bajur from Samaki, called his trainees together. “Now, I don’t know exactly how much experience these ade have with their jetpacks, but you will be helpful. There’s plenty you lot can learn about being quiet and sneaky from them. I’ve never heard a bigger herd of mythosaurs crashing through the underbrush than you shu'shuke in my life.” 

The Samaki trainees all stifled their giggles, as one asked on their private comm channel if Kewe was old enough to know what a herd of mythosaurs sounded like. Kewe glared at them all. 

The three Navarro trainees were joined by Tabor. Before she’d left with Din and Jha’iil, Teryn had asked him how much training he’d had, and the answer was “not much.” He’d become a Foundling after the Tribe had settled on Navarro, so his entire training had been below ground, with the occasional forays off world or out on the lava flats. She’d sighed a bit, and then asked Ilan, the Navarro al’verde bajur, if Tabor could join in on the jetpack training.

“At least one of our medics should be mobile as possible. The other medics here can teach him the finer points of the medical evacuations, but I’d like to make sure his basics are solid, first.” 

Ilan nodded. “Makes sense. With him, that brings our group to four, and they have eight. It’s tidy.” 

Tabor, for his part, was excited about getting to train properly, and a bit sad about so many of his cohort who never got the chance. Vayez and Vha, especially, had loved the few times they were able to go out and fly, and Tabor knew that the only reason he had survived where they had not was because he was a baar’ur, and sent with the Foundlings to evacuate. 

It had been a difficult several months, and it only got worse when the old al’baar’ur had ultimately died of wounds taken in the evacuation. He honestly had no idea what he would have done if Din hadn’t brought Teryn home, and he never felt so relieved as he did when she’d walked in. 

He would defend her _to the death_. 

Ilan and Kewe split the groups up. Samaki only had a few training jetpacks, but the Navarro group brought more than enough to make up the shortfall. Kewe had made an impressed and inquiring noise about it, and Ilan quietly said that the Armorer had been able to salvage many of them. 

Faris was excited. He’d only been out to train with the Rising Phoenix once, and everyone was so tense and anxious about it that he couldn’t really enjoy it. His siblings had given him all sorts of advice- some of which he was certain had been fake, and when he got back they had been so happy for him to excitedly tell them everything.

He missed Vayez and Vha a lot, and had to go be alone when the Armorer had given him the jetpack that was supposed to be Vha’s. “You haven’t the training for this yet, and you may not use it without supervision _and I assure you I will know._ ” Faris had nodded before reverently taking the jetpack. 

Getting to fly in the open air, in the _sun_ , that was something he wished his siblings had lived to see.

“Have you ever done this before?” One of the Samaki kids asked him. Seviju, he remembered. 

“Once. We had to sneak out, but we could only go if the ship was on-world.” Faris scowled, remembering precisely who piloted that ship. “A bunch of things had to be right in order for us to go.” 

“That’s awful.” 

“It wasn’t so bad. It made for a couple days of adventure.” 

Din hadn’t wanted to say, but when the Armorer informed him that he would be staying in the Covert for a while, he was secretly relieved. He could use the time to recover. Cara said she didn’t mind, and set up in the room that Teryn had been given in the Navarro building. It was removed from everyone else, and was comfortable enough, and it was incredibly clear that Teryn wasn’t going to be using it. 

Mostly Cara stayed out of everyone’s way, watching with interest, but content to drink net’ra gal and play with Jha’iil, breathing the clean air. It was nice to have a few days with few demands on her time. 

Cara found Teryn watching the Rising Phoenix training from a distance- mostly with clinical interest (is someone going to crash?) but with a hint of something else in her face. Cara watched for a while as four trainees would go up, each with one adult, and go through their paces. 

“What are they doing? Do you know?”

Teryn nodded. “They’re just beginning to learn how to use them, so they go up with a trainer who’s giving them instructions on their helmet comms. The other trainees in their group are on the same channel, so they can hear everything. Right now they’re working on up and down and forwards- same principles as flying a ship, just with controlling your thrust on your back.”

“Did you learn how to do this?”

“A little.” Teryn huffed back a laugh. “Once it became clear that I would be good at surgery, sending me into combat would have been a waste.” She glanced down. “And now, well…”

“Flying without a helmet seems like a bad idea.”

“It’s suicidal.” Teryn’s voice turned wistful. “I do kind of miss it.” She straightened up as one of the trainees went up a lot faster than was clearly intended. “Oops.” 

Cara watched as the trainer went up after and guided the kid down to a more manageable level. “Looks like they’re trying to keep them at non-lethal heights.”

“That’s the idea.” Teryn glanced at Cara. “You didn’t ask, but they have medkits there. But if there’s a bunch of medics standing around just waiting for them to crash and burn, it makes them nervous.” 

“Fair enough.” 

They watched for a while as one group, then another went up and flew around. “I’m surprised no one is showboa-” Cara said, then cut off as one of the kids turned a somersault in midair. “....ah.” They couldn’t hear the shouting that was surely happening, but the other trainees immediately returned to the ground, and the trainers all flew to the kid. One of them- Paz, judging from the relative size, grabbed the trainee and his jetpack cut off as he was hauled back down. 

“Showboating is short lived. I’m not sure which kid that was, but they’ll be dealing with skut duty for a while.” 

“As my ba’buir says, ade the galaxy over are all the same.” Cuan laughed, coming up behind them. Teryn gave him a smile and Cara raised an eyebrow, looking him over critically. He had his helmet on, and returned her once over with one of his own. 

Teryn shook her head in mild exasperation. “This is Cara Dune-”

“Boor- what was that word you used?” 

“Burc’ya.” 

Cara grinned, showing her teeth. “I’m a burc’ya of her ….ori’vod.” She glanced at Teryn. “Did I get that right?” Teryn nodded, trying to control a giggle. Cara returned to her assessment of Cuan. “You must be the socks.”

“I’m...what?”

“She bought socks. I’m assuming those were for you.” Cara tilted her head, her entire posture screaming, _are you worthy of socks?_

Cuan nodded slowly, and straightened his shoulders ever so slightly. “Cuan Tadasco.”

Cara’s eyes narrowed slightly. “You use names. How fucking refreshing.” 

Cuan laughed, out loud. “Isn’t it? I still don’t know most of their names.” 

Teryn shrugged. “They don’t trust you yet.” 

“How long before you trusted me, cyar’ika?” She could hear the smirk in his voice as his gloved hand snaked up under her cape and ran his fingers along the very top of her back plate. 

Teryn shot him a dirty look while Cara cackled in glee. “That’s different.” 

“Was it?” 

“Well, I figured there was a better than even shot I was going to die the next morning, so it didn’t seem like _that_ big a risk.” She shot him a smirk. “And I told you not to abuse it.” 

“I’d like to think I haven’t, LaarSenaar.” 

“You haven’t.” Teryn’s smile turned soft, and he hummed quietly, continuing to run his fingers along her back plate. 

There was a shout from behind them, and the entire passel of younger children, the Samaki herd and the Navarro Foundlings, poured out and thundered out to the rocks. Where before it had been easy to tell which group each child belonged to- the Herd refused to wear helmets, the Foundlings all resolutely wore theirs, Teryn could tell there had been some mixing it up. More than one Foundling took off their helmet before they divided into teams for a chaotic game of get’shuk, and some of the Samaki Herd still wore thiers. Plus, the teams were mixed between the two groups, and evenly distributed as to age and size. Progress.

Another helmeted Mandalorian came out of the building and sat down off to the side where they could see the children, and gave Teryn and Cuan a nod before starting to tinker with some armor. 

“Is this how you were raised?” Cara asked. 

Teryn shook her head. “Not at all. It was wartime, and there weren't a lot of places on Concordia for us to play like that, or time. Most games were really training exercises.” 

Cuan nodded. “We were on Mandalore, and in theory it was supposed to be peacetime, but… well, the Siege. And there were no real outside spaces like this.” 

Cara nodded. “I’ve tried to sort out the history of Mandalore before the Empire, and…”

“Oh, it’s a mess. Even people who lived it get confused.” Teryn waved her hands. “Shifting alliances, splinter groups of splinter groups…. And everyone has their own version of history.” 

Cuan nodded in agreement. It was a mess. “I think, technically, we were on opposite sides of the Civil War, weren’t we, mesh’la?”

Teryn snorted. “Which one?” He snorted and nodded. That was a good point. She leaned into him slightly, and he started to massage the muscles right below the base of her neck. 

Cara cleared her throat, and jerked her chin. “Looks like your trainees are coming back.” They all looked to see the group trooping back, one kid favoring one leg and leaning on the shoulder of another. Teryn sighed, and moved to intercept them. 

Cara gave Cuan another appraising glance as he watched his songbird go to work. “How’d you win her?” 

“No idea how I got so lucky.” Cuan admitted. “Treated her like a whole person, mostly.” 

“What was that you called her?” 

“LaarSenaar?” he scuffed the dirt with his toes. “It means songbird.” 

Cara nodded. He was worthy of the socks. 

Din was vaguely anxious about the celebration. The whole Navarro Tribe was, to be fair, but Din didn’t particularly like large groups. They made him anxious. And he was worried about how Jha’iil would react. A small covert was one thing, a small covert that needed to remain quiet was another. A large covert that had a place where they could get rowdy? Jha’iil was small and had a habit of getting into places he shouldn’t. 

Even when growing up with the fighting corps where the philosophy of “fight hard, play hard” was just a fact of life, he wasn’t comfortable with large groups. As he’d gotten older and large groups were just a pile of unknown enemies, he’d become less comfortable. 

He even offered to take sentry duty rather than go, but the Armorer had merely told him that wasn’t necessary, with a tone that implied heavily that he should be there. With Jha’iil. He’d sighed, but Cara was excited to see a real “Mando bash” even though she was sure the food was going to kill her. 

Teryn was also anxious. She’d met some people, but had shied away from meeting too many. Cuan and Rima hadn’t pushed, but it was time.

Things were already well underway when they approached. There were tables loaded with food- Kreez had jumped in right away, thrilled to be cooking for his own people again, and he might have been a touch over-enthusiastic in making skraan’ikase that could be slipped under a helmet. The Samaki skraan’ur had heard that the Navarro skraan’ur was very good, and took up the challenge.

There was food, there was drink, there was a bonfire, children running around, people with and without helmets chatting. Some of the trainees were mixing and introducing their new friends and comrades to their buire… 

...and there was singing. 

Teryn stopped, and Cuan turned to look at her. He’d chosen to wear his helmet, but she could hear the smile he gave her. 

The sounds were unmistakably Buy’ceLaar- Helmet Song. People were beating out a complex rhythm on a helmet, while others sang with and around each other, varying the tune and the tempo, in a beautifully complex array of sound. 

“When was the last time you played?” 

“For real? Before the Purge.” 

He gave her a gentle push. “Go. I’ll get some ne’tra gal.” 

Teryn slowly made her way to where the singers were, listening to how the rhythms played out, humming a bit, before joining in. Quietly at first, then with more confidence. It was strange to play as an adult without a modulator. 

Cuan stood back and watched, and Tuathal joined him. “She’s singing.” Cuan nodded. He was relieved and intensely proud. He drank out of his buc’ye gal, and Tuathal nodded a greeting at Rima.

Rima was thrilled. First, the food was amazing- each skraan’ur were determined to out-do the other, which means everyone won. Second, everyone had come, except for a few people who were on sentry duty. All the children were running about, filching food. 

Even the Navarro people were eating and drinking, using straws. This was good. Even the big grouchy al’verde had been seen eating. The auretii that had come back on the Razor Crest was having fun trying different food and then chugging a drink- she was likely going to hurt in the morning. 

Din approached carrying Jha’iil, who watched all of the commotion with awe and concern. He clutched Din’s cuirass, head swiveling around to see everything. Din patted him on the back. “I know, it’s a lot.” 

Jha’iil pointed to one of the food tables and looked up hopefully. Din sighed. “I don’t know if you’re gonna like it, ad’ika. It’s all going to be pretty spicy.” Jha’iil trilled insistently, and Din realized that there was uj’alayi. “Ah.” 

He got several pieces and stood off to the side, alternating between feeding Jha’iil, wondering if there was going to be a repeat of the Unfortunate Ice Cream Incident, and eating a bit himself. It was good. Jha’iil ate and watched, and then his ears went all the way up at the singing. He tugged on Din’s cowl. “Ba’vodu! Ba’vodu laarir? Laarir!” 

Din smiled as he recognized the song. 

"Vod and adike that have a mind.  
To leave your troubles far behind.  
Enlist and take a soldiers' pay.  
Go over the stars and far away!

Come and join the infantry,  
Where the real soldiers fight, you'll see.  
Our comrades we will not betray,  
Over the stars and far away.

Over the stars we'll march today,  
And Mand’alor has called so we obey.  
We'll stand our ground and here we'll stay.  
Over the stars and far away!

The politicians sleep at night,  
While out here we will stand and fight.  
Viszla, Wren, we're brothers all,  
Remember us if here we fall?

Over the stars we'll march today,  
And Mand’alor has called so we obey.  
We'll stand our ground and here we'll stay.  
Over the stars and far away!"

The crowd all cheered, and Teryn laughed. Voices called out for another song, but she gestured that she needed a break, and a drink. 

She looked around for Cuan, who never did come back with a beer for her, and she found him, helmetless, chatting with Ordo. He gave her a big grin. “Ner LaarSenaar! You sang and it was _great_.”

She raised both eyebrows at him. “Where’s your helmet?”

“What? I dunno. It’s around here somewhere.” 

“Where’s my beer?”

“Oh, I drank it.” 

She nodded. “I can tell.” 

He slung an arm over her shoulders. “Let's get you a beer. And me a new beer.” 

“I don’t know if you need a new beer.” 

“My old one is broken, so. I need a new one.” He shoved his nose into her hair. “Your hair is so pretty. I like it. Soft. And there’s so much!” 

She raised an eyebrow. “So I shouldn’t cut it?” 

He gasped. “No! That would be a trav… a trag… very sad.” He pouted. “Please don’t.” 

She had no intention of doing so, of course. But it was fun to tease. They found Din and Jha’iil and Jha’iil immediately clambered over to Teryn’s arms and snuggled. “Are you having fun vod’ad?” She glanced at Din. 

Din huffed. “It’s a lot.” She smiled and nodded. She remembered how much he didn’t like these. Din added, “I heard you. It was good.” 

“Good? She was great. She’s great.” Cuan nuzzled Teryn’s hair again. “And pretty. And _smart_.” 

Din cocked his head at Teryn and she shrugged. “He’s had a couple buy’ce of beer.”

“Four.” 

Ah. She corrected herself. “He’s had four. And I’ve had _none_.” 

“I’m sorry. I got distracted.” He started to nibble at her ear and she pushed his face away. Din did notice that even when in his buckets, Cuan still kept his hands away from Teryn’s face. He nudged his estimation of the man up another notch. 

Jha’iil looked at him suspiciously, then at Teryn. She shrugged at him. “He’ll probably feel like you did after the ice cream.” Jha’iil folded his ears down in sympathy. He did not feel good after that. Teryn looked around. “Where’s Cara?” 

“...I don’t know. I saw her talking to alor… our alor… a while ago, and…” Din paused. “...I haven’t seen either of them since.” He and Teryn frowned at each other.

“LaarSenaar, ner cyare, cyar’ika.” Cuan pulled on the tie on one of her braids and started to clumsily unpick it. “Take me to bed.” 

Teryn flushed deeply, thankful that it was dark enough to hide the color in her cheeks. Din politely took Jha’iil back and turned away. “I will take you to _sleep_.” She glanced at her ori’vod’s back. “Good night. I am going to deal with this overly friendly lothwolf.” Cuan obligingly growled and she rolled her eyes.

Din nodded back, and was considering heading back to their own rooms when Tuathal appeared at his side. Jha’iil trilled a greeting, and Tuathal smiled back. “Su cuy’gar, verd’ika.” He tilted his head at Din. “I hear this one can move things. We should talk.” 

  
Teryn got Cuan back to their rooms finally- they were still a work in progress, but it was coming together. The entire way there was a monologue about how pretty her hair was, or how pretty she was, how smart and capable, how good she was at singing. 

“This is embarrassing.” 

“Why? I’m just telling the truth.” Cuan started tugging at his boots, and she watched in a mixture of amusement and concern. 

“We’ve very rarely had the security to get shitfaced like this.” 

“You’re safe here.” He shed the bulk of his armor, grabbed at her hips and buried his face into the gambeson covering her lower abdomen. “We’re safe here.” 

She ran her fingers through his hair. “Where is your helmet?”

“I dunno. Rima probably has it. Gonna need to ransom it back from her. Find it in the morning.” He grabbed her hand and kissed the palm. "Your hands are amazing." 

She chuckled. “Why are you like this?” 

“Like what?” He plucked half-competently at her belt. “Because I feel happy. And lucky.” 

“Mmmhmmm.” She gave him the gentlest of shoves, and he fell backwards into the bed. 

He rolled to his side, closed his eyes and mumbled, “Ger kar’taylir darasuum.” 

Teryn blinked. And then blinked again as he started to snore. “...wait, what?” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do I remain on my Great Big Sea shit? I do. Over the Stars adapted from Over the Hills, which is adapted from a 17th century English song. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pcHpVhxomY8
> 
> So far, the best thing I've found that sounds like what Buy'ceLaar sounds like in my head is La Marche des Iroquois by Vent du Nord. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kFI7RuhBkHQ
> 
> Mando'a Translations 
> 
> ba’vodu: parent's sibling  
> ad’ika: little one  
> al’verde bajur: commander of educating children  
> ade: children  
> shu'shuke: disasters  
> baar’ur: medic  
> al’baar’ur: doctor  
> net’ra gal: black ale - sweet, almost spicy black beer similar to milk stout  
> ba’buir: grandfather  
> Burc’ya: Friend  
> ori'vod: Older sibling  
> cyar’ika: sweetheart  
> get’shuk: Team game similar to meshgeroya, in that there are goals at either end of the pitch, except the players may handle the ball. Very similar to rugby; brutal, fast and painful.  
> mesh’la: beautiful  
> buire: parents  
> buc’ye gal: pint of ale - contents of helmet, actually a lot more than a pint!  
> skraan’ur: cook  
> al’verde: commander  
> auretii: outsider  
> skraan'ikase: assorted small snacks like meze or tapas - *small eats* - a celebratory meal for Mandos because it can take hours to eat, and the dishes are often fiddly, a contrast to the easy-to-eat, quick meals necessary in the field  
> uj’alayi: uj cake - dense, very sweet flat cake made of ground nuts, syrup, pureed dried fruit and spice  
> vod’ad: sibling's child  
> alor: chief  
> ner cyare: My beloved  
> Ger kar’taylir darasuum: I love you


	12. Sometimes you gotta give in to win

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I am a mess.” He hung his head. “I think I might have said something dumb.”
> 
> “You? Say something dumb? While batnor? Surely not.” 
> 
> It's morning! Everyone is a mess.

Din watched Teryn take Cuan away, shaking his head at the drunken ramblings. Teryn hadn’t been angry, he could see she’d been confused and amused and mildly embarrassed by turns. He was pretty sure Cuan was going to be in pain in the morning. 

Jha’iil made a greeting trill. “Su cuy’gar, verd’ika.” The old alor, Tuathal, Din remembered his name, approached. “I heard you can move things. We should talk.” 

Din frowned, but Jha’iil made a contented noise. He gave a nod, then remembered who he was talking to. “Sure.” 

Tuathal smiled. He’d sensed the nod, of course, even with the brightly lit distraction of the ad, but he appreciated the polite gesture. “Let’s go where we won’t be disturbed.” He led Din and Jha’iil into his own rooms and gestured for Din to sit down. Tuathal took his own usual seat in front of the heating unit and sighed in contentment. 

“Old bones prefer the warmth.” Tuathal tilted his head. “You can take your helmet off here, if you’d like. I cannot see your face, and no one will disturb us.” 

Din blinked. This was not a situation he’d ever found himself in before. Jha’iil looked at him, wondering what he would do. After a moment, Din said, “No, thank you, I’d prefer not to.” 

Tuathal nodded, and held out a hand to Jha’iil. “Have you given this verd’ika a name?” Jha’iil reached out and took his finger in a claw.

“Yes.” Din paused, deeply uncomfortable. “He is named for my buir and someone who gave his life to protect him.” 

Tuathal nodded. “That’s good.” He tilted his head. “What were taught of the jedi?”

“Nothing.” 

“Nothing at all?”

“Alor told us… when she gave me our signet, about stories of Mandalore the Great fighting enemy sorcerers.” 

Tuathal sighed. “I suppose there was not much time for history.” 

“She said he was a Foundling, not an enemy.” Din ran his fingers down Jha’iil’s face and tickled his belly a little, earning a giggle. “He’s my kid.” 

“She is right. About all those things.” Tuathal touched Jha’iil’s ear. 

“Do they still exist? The Jedi?”

“They vanished at the end of the Clone Wars. The Empire killed them all.” 

Din sat back. “All of them?”

“Not all, but most. A few managed to survive, here and there. I don’t know what may have become of any of them.” Tuathal looked up, and back into his memory. “It was right after the Siege, so we were… occupied with other matters.” 

Din frowned. That matched up with what Cara remembered, about the Jedi vanishing when she was a child. The end of the Clone Wars wasn’t that long ago, and well after Jha’iil had been born. 

“The Jedi used the Force, and were, supposedly, peacekeepers for the Galaxy. How that turned into them becoming the leadership for the Grand Army of the Republic, I’m not sure.” Tuathal shrugged. “But they would find children who were sensitive to the Force, and take them and train them.” 

“Take?” Din growled. One does not simply _take_ children. 

“It sounds bad when I say it like that. And perhaps sometimes it was. But, to my understanding, they saw it as helping children who had powers, and teaching them how to use and control them.” 

“I see.” Jha’iil yawned and cuddled into Din’s chest, and after giving Tuathal a speculative look, used his powers to pull Din’s cape around him like a blanket. Din adjusted himself automatically, and Tuathal smiled. “I see he has some control.” 

“How can you tell?” 

Tuathal smiled. “I have… similar abilities. Oh, not nearly so strong as the verd’ika- I’ve never heard of someone so strong and so young- but I can… sense things about people. His strength, your determination…” he paused. “Your worry for him.” 

“You’re a sorcerer?”

“I might have been, had I been found by the Jedi, instead of the Mandalorians. I’ve had very little training.” He tilted his head at Jha’iil, who had almost completely dozed off. “Mostly how to protect myself from being sensed- when I was young, there was concern that the Jedi would try to take me, which of course, would not be allowed.” 

“And you became alor.” 

Tuathal smiled. “Well, fighting is easier if you can sense things about your opponents. It’s possible to influence people into following you, but I would like to think I did not do that.” 

“Can you…” Din thought about how he wanted to word the question. “Can you tell what people are thinking? Can you tell what I’m thinking?” 

“I have a sense of your emotions, I can tell movement to a certain extent, but I cannot read your thoughts.” Tuathal’s mouth twitched in a half smile. “And beskar helmets tend to dampen the effect.” Din stiffened, and Tuathal held up his hands. “No, no, I wasn’t trying to get you to remove your helmet for that. I was merely trying to be polite.” 

“Is that why your people remove their helmets when they’re home?” 

“No. We never subscribed to your philosophy of hiding our faces even when at home. Out in the greater galaxy, after the Purge, yes, of course. But never here. We had some people join us from your corner of the diaspora, and tried to convince us, but I didn’t want our adike growing up like that.” Tuathal smiled faintly. “My own ade and bu’adike had to grow up in war, as did you and yours. I wanted the current herd of them to have some childhood, like I did. Mando’ade, but also ade.” 

Din nodded slowly, thinking over everything Tuathal had said. “What’s the Force? ”

“Ah,” Tuathal nodded. “We need to start at the beginning. The Force, as I understand it, is an energy that binds everything together, and there are people who can use that energy to do things. Move things, sense things…” 

“...heal people?” Din asked, slowly. 

Tuathal paused. “Has he done that?”

“A couple of times.” 

Tuathal hummed. “Impressive.” 

“We try not to let him do that much. It takes a lot out of him.” 

“Your vod’ika is aware?”

“He healed her once.” Din tucked his cape more securely around Jha’iil, who was making tiny snores. “She told me she wouldn’t have asked him to… for your bu’ad. It wouldn’t have been fair.”

Tuathal nodded. “She was right.” 

Din sighed. “Still. I wish we could have done more.”

“You did more than was expected, and we would have lost them both without your assistance. We, my Tribe, my aliit, and myself, we are all in your debt. Vor entye.” Tuathal inclined his head in respect. Din nodded back. 

Din focused on something else. “Is it helmets that dampen the effect, or armor?” He paused, not sure how to word what he was really asking. 

“I have noticed that people who are not wearing helmets are clearer to me. It’s been a while since I’ve been around anyone not wearing any beskar- even the verd’ika has his amulet- so I cannot be entirely sure.” Tuathal cocked his head. “What are you really worried about?”

Din thought about it for a second. “If the Jedi are gone, but there are people who can still use this…. Force… then…” 

“Then could they try to get after the verd’ika? Yes.” 

“Or us.” Din frowned, wondering if he needed to start worrying about a helmet for Jha’iil sooner, rather than later. He’d talk to the Armorer about it. “Beskar can block it…”

“To an extent, yes.” 

Din sighed. “Is there any way to keep him from an incident like the one in the creche?” 

“I’m not sure, honestly, he’s so young. But.. I’ll see what we can do, if you’ll allow it?” 

Din nodded in relief. It wasn’t much, but it was something. 

After Cuan had passed out, Teryn stared at him for several minutes. This was ridiculous. Utterly ridiculous. He could not possibly have realized what he was saying, not in the least. He probably wouldn’t remember in the morning...or whenever he woke up. Best to pretend it didn’t happen. 

She sighed, and then sighed again as he rolled over and sprawled across the entire bed. He was a sprawler (and a snuggler) even when sober, but he’d only gotten part of his armor off. A bed hog was one thing. A bed hog with hard pointy bits was another thing entirely. 

There was only one thing to do. She went outside and climbed up on one of the boulders, and let the sounds of bonfire winding down soothe her into a light doze. Atin joined her, and they stayed there until sunrise. 

Once the sun came up, they climbed down. If her recollections of such celebrations were in any way correct, there would be a rash of hangovers, upset stomachs, and mostly likely some split knuckles that needed attention. A bit of a drunken brawl was almost always involved, if people felt like they could cut loose. 

At least it hadn’t been Cuan and Paz. Paz and somebody else, maybe, but, not her overly friendly lothwolf. She peeked in the sleeping room. Cuan hadn’t appeared to have moved. He was still snoring quietly, though, and was bound to have one hell of hangover. She politely put out a pitcher of water, but placed it across the room, where he’d have to get out of bed to get at it. She might, if he asked nicely, give him the hangover remedy that she’d devised on Panoog, but not without some groveling. 

He’d never brought her any beer. And he’d been embarrassing. 

And there was that whole other… thing. 

On second thought, _a lot_ of groveling was required. 

She got to the medbay before anyone else, and was pleasantly surprised to see that there was no one that had needed to stay the night. The sont roots they’d brought back were stewing, but it would be time to mix them in with a salve soon. All in all, the day was starting quietly and pleasantly, which definitely meant it was going to devolve into chaos by lunchtime. 

Sure enough, the first hungover victims rolled in by midmorning, along with one person who’d managed to get a tooth knocked out. Teryn got a call from H’lava that a few of the Navarro Foundlings weren’t feeling great, and could she come over, please? 

At the Navarro building, several of the children were looking green around the edges, and Teryn strongly suspected that they’d just overeaten rich food that they weren’t used to. Once they started listing the things they’d eaten (“There was this thing? A little pocket of spicy cheese? Yeah, I had about eight of those.”) she nodded. “They’re gonna feel miserable for a bit, but they’ll be fine.” She’d brought some syrup that would help, though. 

She glanced at the adults, and decided to leave some extra, just in case. Though the small bites that could be slipped under a helmet did cut down on the potential for overindulging, a determined person could manage it. You’d have to want it. But she knew her Tribe. Someone would need it. 

“Ba’vodu!” A small green blur started to determinedly crawl up her leg. She grinned and picked up a happy Jha’iil. “Here! You here!” He patted her cuirass happily. 

“Vaar’tur! Did you have fun last night?” 

“He tried to eat his weight in uj’alayi.” Din sighed. “I think I managed to prevent that.” 

“You didn’t learn from the ice cream?” 

“Cake. Alayi. Not same.” Teryn and Din exchanged a look over Jha’iil’s head. No, he did not learn. 

“We had a discussion with the old alor after you and… after you two left.” 

Teryn rolled her eyes. “He who _drinks my beer_ is still sleeping it off. How did that go?”

“He had some interesting things to say, but…” Din paused as Cara came down a hall that was nowhere near the room she’d been given. “Vaar’tur.”

“Is that good morning?”

“Just ‘morning.’ No value judgments.” Teryn and Din looked at Cara with identical head tilts, and Cara had the distinct impression that if she could see Din’s face they have the exact same expression of speculation and judgment. 

“What?”

Both of them shook their heads. “Nothing.” Teryn raised an eyebrow at Din, and he shrugged. 

“Stop having conversations about people around them! It’s weird how you can do that.” 

Teryn smirked. “Do I want to know where you spent the night?” 

“Where did you spend yours?” Cara scowled.

“On a rock.” 

“....what?” 

Teryn waved her hand. “I’ll explain late-” She shut her mouth abruptly as the Armorer came out the same hallway and went to the Forge. She looked at Cara, who had become abruptly closed faced, then at Din, who stared after the Armorer. Teryn paused, then looked at Cara again. 

Cara shrugged and went to go find some caff. 

Teryn and Din looked at each other again, and after a moment in which they both silently agreed to never speak of any of this again, he said, “So, I’m going to take him to the creche today, we’ll see how it goes.” 

“Will his new toys?” 

“Yeah, hopefully that’ll work better.” He took Jha’iil back. “Are you ready to try playing with your new friends again?”

Jha’iil thought about it. He had liked playing with them. There were many toys and sometimes they’d all nap in a big pile, and they played outside sometimes, too. He nodded. “Okay.” 

“Okay.” Din carried him outside, and let him run towards the creche. Teryn followed them out, and Din said to her, “We’re going to be leaving again soon, and I want him to get some time with the kids before we do.” 

Teryn nodded. “You’ll be taking him?” 

“Yeah, I think so. At least at first. We’ll see how things go, but…” He glanced at her sideways. “I assume you’d rather stay here?”

Teryn huffed. Mostly yes, she did want to stay. It was safer, and it was better for the Tribes, and running was a terrible idea. But on the other hand, running seemed really easy. It would be less painful to do it now. But deep in that place where her soul used to be, she wanted to stay. “Four people on that ship is a lot.” 

“It’s true, but…. I wanted to give you the option.” 

“Thank you. But no.” She didn’t want to leave, when it came down to it. The few days away had been a relief, but being back was… nice. More than nice. She nudged him with her elbow. “But you’ll come back regularly.” 

“Yes, as long as we aren’t being tracked.” He sighed. “I won’t bring danger back to our doorstep again.” 

She nodded. “Yeah.” 

Teryn headed back to med bay, and was intercepted by Rima. “So.” 

“...so?”

“We have a tradition here. If you lose track of your helmet, you have to pay a ransom before you get it back.” Rima’s grin could be seen from the Core. “Any ideas?” 

Teryn laughed. “What’s a standard ransom?” 

“Oh, cleaning armor, fetching meals for a week, that kind of thing. But, well. If there’s anything you want from him…” Rima smirked, only semi-suggestively. 

Teryn flushed. 

Rime sighed. “I’m sorry if I embarrassed you. I’ve known Cuan for… a long time.” 

“It’s fine. I just...I’m not used to…” Teryn gestured widely. “All of this.” 

Rima nodded, and after they had walked for a bit, looked at her speculatively. “If I… if _we_ offered you the chance to take the Creed again, would you want it?” 

Teryn stopped in her tracks. That thought was one that she’d never dare think of, not since Cuan had said that his Tribe wouldn’t consider her dar’manda. She’d actively not thought about it. 

She had not thought about it so hard she was exhausted by it. 

“I don’t... “ She looked down at her hands, then up at Rima. “It would be a lie.” 

“Cin vhetin.” _Blank slate._

Teryn shook her head. “Not for me.” 

Rima nodded. “I had a feeling. Still. If you want to talk about it later…” She smiled and gave Teryn’s elbow a friendly, gentle squeeze. “Now I’m going to think about what I want in order for that drunken di’kut to get his helmet back.” Teryn smiled, back, but it was tense and brittle. 

Rima wondered if she had perhaps played that card too soon. 

In the med bay, the di’kut in question was slumped in a corner. He had many regrets. First, he regretted that third beer. He probably had other regrets, but they all stemmed from the third beer. His head hurt, his stomach was in a delicate state, and he’s woken up wearing a good portion of his armor. He had a vague memory of his Songbird singing, and laughing, and another, maybe of her threatening to cut her hair? He hoped very much he was remembering that incorrectly. 

He looked up to see her looking at him from the door with a mixture of amusement and something else he couldn’t quite identify. “LaarSenaar. Please help.” 

“K’atini.” She smirked. “Should have thought about that before you drank my beer.” 

“Did I? I remember three…”

“You told me four.” 

“Oh.” That would explain a lot. “I don’t even remember getting to our rooms last night…”

She raised her eyebrows. “Nothing?” 

“....no. Did I say something stupid?” 

She cocked her head, eyes narrowed. “No. Well. You talked about my hair a lot.” 

“Oh. I love your hair.” 

She grinned and nodded. “I know.” Even if she hadn’t known that before -and she did- he’d made it abundantly clear the night before. He was not a particularly subtle man, her wolf, her kurs’kaded. 

“Please help me.” He tried to look as pitiful as possible, which, to be fair, wasn’t a stretch. 

She shook her head. “Not until you talk to Rima and get your helmet back. No helmet, no magic remedy.” 

“That’s the price?” At her nod, he sagged. “That’s fair, I guess.” He dragged himself to his feet. “I’ll be back.” He ran a hand down a braid. “I’m sorry I didn’t bring you a beer.” 

“That you drank it. You drank my beer, Khi’kurs’kaded.” 

“I’m sorry I drank your beer.” He tapped his forehead on the top of her head, and made a small groan of pain. She smirked at him, and he sighed. “I know, I know. K’atini.” 

In Rima’s office, she had clearly been expecting him. His helmet was lined up on her desk with two others. He choked back a laugh. “At least I’m not the only one.”

“You look like a mess, vod.” 

“I am a mess.” He hung his head. “I think I might have said something dumb.”

“You? Say something dumb? While batnor? Surely not.” 

“I’m told I can’t get any help for this until I come back with my helmet. What do I need to do?” 

“Well, first, you’re going to help these other two check our weapons and munitions, clean everything, you know the drill.” Rima smiled. “I’ll give it to you before you complete it, because I cannot trust you to know which end of a blaster is which in this condition.”

This was all reasonable. Too reasonable. “You said first.”

“Yes, that’s first. Second, we need to see if there’s anything left of your ship, and if not, we need to procure a new one. And you’ll be going along on that.” 

Oh. 

“Do I…” 

“Yes. You have to.” She tilted her head. “Part of your job is to chase down rumors of Gideon and other Tribes. You can’t do that from here, and you can’t do that without a ship.”

“I don’t…” It seemed ridiculous to say _I don’t want to leave because I am worried about how Teryn will react._

“She’ll be fine. Don’t worry.” Rima had known him long enough to be able to guess what he was worried about.

“I can’t help it. I do worry about her.”

“She already looks and seems much better.” Rima hesitated. “I did… I did bring up the idea of taking the Creed again with her.” 

Cuan raised his eyebrows. He wasn’t surprised that Rima brought it up, but he would have waited a bit longer, personally. “What did she say?”

“That it would feel like a lie.” 

Cuan sighed and nodded. He wasn’t surprised. “I don’t think that was your place.” 

“I am alor here. It’s precisely my place.” Rima glared at him. “It’s her choice, ultimately. But it was always going to be my call to make the offer.” 

Cuan gave a curt nod. She was right, but he didn’t like it. “When should I be prepared to ship out?” 

“It’ll take you a couple of days to do the weapons maintenance and get ready. You and the salvage crew will be leaving in three days.” 

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mando'a translations
> 
> Su cuy’gar: Hello - lit. *You're still alive.*  
> verd'ika: Little soldier  
> alor: Chief  
> ad/ade: child/children  
> ad'ika/adike: little one, son, daughter, of any age - also used informally to adults much like *lads* or *guys*,  
> buir: Parent  
> bu'ad/bu’adike: grandchild, grandchildren  
> Mando’ade: Children of Mandalore  
> vod’ika: Younger sibling  
> aliit: family, clan  
> Vor entye: Thank you (lit. *I accept a debt*)  
> Ba’vodu: parent's sibling  
> Vaar’tur: morning  
> uj’alayi: Uj cake  
> di’kut: idiot, useless individual, waste of space (lit. someone who forgets to put their pants on)  
> LaarSenaar: SongBird  
> K’atini: It's only pain  
> khi'kurs’kaded: little wolf.  
> vod: brother, comrade  
> batnor: drink (lit: "On your back.")


	13. When the fire's burnt and the wind has blown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “So. When do you ship out?”
> 
> “Three days.” 
> 
> She nodded. “My ori’vod is leaving in a few days, too.”
> 
> Oh. “Will you be okay?” 
> 
> Many goodbyes are said.

After Cuan staggered off to go collect his helmet, Teryn stared out the window, turning things over in her mind. It was a lot for one morning- the offer from Rima, or at least the potential offer. Din and Jha’iil would be leaving soon, which meant Cara would also be leaving. Cara and.. Teryn shook her head. Nope, not gonna dwell on that. 

And there was that thing Cuan had said. Which he didn’t remember, thankfully, so they didn’t need to talk about it. That wasn’t going to stop her from over-thinking about it. 

Well. She could overthink while keeping her hands busy. She turned to the salve. She could get that done before Din and Jha’iil left. He’d definitely need some, the disaster. 

When there was a noise at the entrance, she expected it to be Cuan and his helmet, but instead it was an obviously pregnant woman, with a slightly wan expression. “Excuse me, are you the… Roccan said...” she gestured to her stomach. She had her cuirass on, but instead of the usual padded gambeson, she had a loose tunic. 

Teryn smiled. “You’re... oh, he gave me your name…” She gestured at one of the beds. “Please sit.”

The woman smiled back. “Lathom.” She sat down gratefully. 

“Weren’t we supposed to meet tomorrow? Did I get the days confused?” Teryn pulled out a medscanner and a datapad. 

“We were, but I don’t feel quite… the thing. My ankles suddenly swelled up, and I just feel…. Like something isn’t right.” Lathom chewed her lip worriedly. “Roccan is good, but he doesn’t know much about pregnancy.” She looked at Teryn worriedly. “Do you?”

“I was with the Alliance Medcorps for a while, and while it was mostly combat medicine, we had a few babies born. And then I was the main doctor for a small mining planet. Learned a lot from local midwives.” Teryn smiled reassuringly. “I know what I’m about. Looks like you’re about… seven and a half months?” 

Lathom nodded and laid back. “Almost eight.” 

Teryn patted her hand. “Let’s get started.” 

After a thorough examination, Teryn hummed. “The baby is healthy and fine. You need to go on bed rest immediately.” 

“Shit.” Lathom grumbled. "That sounds boring."

“It is, but we would prefer the baby to keep cooking for as long as we can keep you healthy, which means for you, bed rest. You can walk from the bed to the refresher, but that’s it. Do you have an outside door?” Lathom nodded, and Teryn cocked her head. “Do you have a hammock?”

“No.”

“I’ll lend you mine so you can get outside, at least. I’ve found that fresh air is helpful for a lot of things, and rarely hurts.” She handed Lathom a med scanner and a datapad. “I’ll be by twice a day to check on you, but do scans right when you wake up, a couple times during the day, and right before you go to sleep. If any of the readings turn red, call me right away.” 

Lathom nodded slowly. 

“Is there a co-parent? Someone who can help you?”

“My riduur is off-world right now, but he should be back soon.” Lathom chewed her lip. “Maybe we should call him?” 

Teryn nodded. “I’ll talk to your alor, and we’ll get someone to bring you food.” She nodded reassuringly. “We just need to give the baby as much time as possible.” She showed Lathom to the door, and found Cuan waiting outside, clutching his helmet. 

“I got it.” He held it up. “Please?” 

Teryn and Lathom exchanged an amused glance, and Teryn said, “I’ll see you later today, with the hammock. Bed.” Lathorm left, and Teryn handed Cuan a dose of the hangover remedy. “This shit is magic.” 

He drank it and leaned his back. “I have some bad news.” 

“Oh?” She started to put things away, keeping her voice calm and neutral. “Does it have to do with what you did to get your helmet back?”

“What? Oh, that. No. Well, kind of. I would have had to do this anyway.” He blinked, several times. “Wow. That shit _is_ magic.” 

“I know. I made it. What’s happening?” 

“She’s sending me off-world in a few days to see if there’s anything salvageable from my ship, and to probably get a new one.” 

“Oh.” 

“I’m sorry. But…”

“Orders are orders, I know.” She looked at him, then back down. 

“I could ask if you could come with me.” He staggered to his feet and put his hands on her shoulders. “I’m sure Rima would think about it.” 

She covered his hands with hers. “I can’t. She-” Teryn nodded at the door Lathom exited out of, “-needs me around, and,” she twisted her mouth. “We played with enough fire, me going out with my ori’vod. It would be too risky to try it again.” She bowed her head so he could press his forehead to her crown, and he cupped one hand at the base of her skull. “How long?”

“Hard to say. Depends on what the salvage team thinks.” 

She huffed a laugh. “The Jawas in armor?”

He smiled. “Yeah.” He skritched her skull a bit, and then took a deep breath. “Rima told me what she asked you.” 

Teryn pulled back and looked at him. “Ah. Yes.” 

“And she told me what you said.” He started to say something else, and she shook her head and put her fingers in front of his mouth. 

“I have work to do. And we will talk about this later when your head is a bit less muddled.” She wrinkled her nose. “Also you smell. Please go get clean.” He chuckled and nuzzled her hair. She was, as usual, right. 

Din and Cara sat on the gangway to the Razor Crest. They’d checked over the ship, done a few repairs, but mostly, they’d taken the opportunity to relax. Din was still feeling stiff and Cara was still feeling the effects of “a real Mando bash.” 

So far, there hadn’t been a call from the creche, so that was good. 

“It’s nice here.” Cara had discovered a taste for ne’tra gal and was drinking some. Not a full buy'ce- Cara was many things, but an idiot was not one of them- but a decent sized muge. 

“It is.” 

“The kid likes it here.” 

“He does.” 

“Is it smart to take him with you?” Cara raised her eyebrows. “He is safer here…”

Din sighed. “I’m not sure, honestly, there’s someone here who might be able to help him control his powers. But he’s happier with me.” He glanced at Cara, head tilted. “Aren’t you the same person who thought it was a terrible idea to leave him on Sorgan?” 

“That was different. You hadn’t admitted he was your kid then.” Cara smirked. “Besides, you weren’t gonna go back for him. Here, you’ll be coming back.” 

“I know. But I left him before, and he was…” Din sighed. “He wants to come with us.” 

Cara sighed. It was Din’s decision, in the end. “What did you name him? Come on.”

Din smiled. She’d resisted demanding for a day longer than he expected. “Jha’iil. Jha was my buir, and the iil comes from…”

“Kuiil.” Cara smiled. “Jha’iil. I like it. Don’t worry, I won’t use it. But I like it.” 

Teryn got everything set up for Lathorm, finished making the salve, and went back to her and Cuan’s quarters. He was there, looking through his gear. “I wasn’t really focusing well this morning… was it morning?” 

She smirked. “Barely.” 

“What was that you called me?” 

“Khi’Kurs’khaded.” _Little wolf._

He grinned. “Little?”

“Well.” She twitched an eyebrow and he laughed. “So. When do you ship out?”

“Three days.” 

She nodded. “My ori’vod is leaving in a few days, too.”

Oh. “Will you be okay?” 

She swallowed. The words _I’m fine_ were about to fall out of her mouth, like they had a hundred thousand times before, but she bit them back. “I don’t know. I’ll try to be.” 

He nodded, and sat down. She sat down next to him and snuggled in his shoulder. They sat quietly for a while, before she glanced up. “You, though. You need to be careful.” 

He cocked his head. “Oh?”

“Last time you went off world you broke your ankle, nearly got killed, and came home with a girl. So… you’ll understand if I have some concerns.” She grinned.

He snorted back a laugh. “You went off world and came back with a man.” 

She raised her eyebrows at him. “I came back with a _cook_. It’s very different.” 

He chuckled, and they settled into silence again. After a while, he asked, “Do you want to talk about Rima’s offer?”

She swallowed. “It would feel like a lie. I appreciate the gesture, but…” She shrugged. “It… I...we...believe that there is no going back. Not from that.” 

He hummed quietly, stroking her hair. 

“And just… taking the Creed again doesn’t wipe it all out. The past ten years…. Almost eleven…” she paused, “Eleven years. They happened. I can’t just…”

“Can’t you?” He noticed that she wasn’t keeping track of the exact days anymore. If nothing else… that was something. “It’s your choice.” 

“There’s no choice.” She shook her head. “Not for me.”

He cuddled her close. He didn’t agree, and neither did Rima, or his ba’buir, but he also knew that arguing wasn’t the way to get her there. If she ever got there, it would have to be on her own. The best he could do was exactly what he had been doing. Rima was right- she was doing much better than when they first got there. 

“But, I will say…” she began, “you were right. It’s been easier here.” 

“I was hoping it would be.” 

After a day spent doing weapons maintenance, Cuan found Din. Teryn was with Lathrom, and he wanted to talk to her ori’vod alone. He politely put his helmet on for this conversation. Din waited warily. He had no idea what the man could want. 

Cuan stood awkwardly. “I know you’re the leader of your clan- she’s… your vod’ika… she’s part of it?”

Din nodded. She hadn’t yet put the signet on her armor, but she also hadn’t given it back. As far as he was concerned, she was a part of his clan. No matter what anyone else thought. 

“Um. I’m not sure what protocol here is…”

“...for what?”

“I mean, it’s still… soon, but… do I…. should I…. declare my intentions or anything?”

Din stood back. “What? You and… my vod’ika?”

“Yes…”

“You’re already living together. What more declaration can you have?” 

Cuan squirmed. He knew he wasn’t doing this well, but he was already in too deep as it was. “Riduurok.” 

“Uh…” Din was often quiet. He often didn't say things. But rarely was he actually speechless.

“I mean, for us, I wouldn’t talk to the leader of her clan, but you’re more… traditional? So… I just want to know what the protocol is.”

Din blinked several times and shook his head slightly. “I don’t…. I have no idea.” He tilted his head. “Have you talked to her about this?”

“No.”

“She’s going to murder you if she finds out you talked to me before you talked to her.” Din snorted. “Then she’s going to murder me.” 

“So… we pretend we never had this conversation?” 

“Yes.” 

“And we pray to the manda and any gods that she never finds out?”

“Yes.” 

“Sounds reasonable.” Cuan tilted his head in a question. “It won’t work, will it?”

Din shook his head. “Nope.” 

  
  


Teryn kept herself busy preparing things for Din and Jha’iil to take and checking on Lathorm, who would alternate between being happy to see her and being enraged at bed rest. 

“Vod, it’s only day two.” 

“I am so bored.” Lathorm squirmed uncomfortably. “I heard you singing at the fire. It was good to hear some of those songs after so long.” 

Teryn eyed her speculatively. “Maybe you can help me with something.” 

“What?” 

“A surprise for my vod’ad.” 

When Din, Jha’iil, and Cara were ready to go the next evening, Teryn saw them off. She’d made sure they were well supplied, and had told Cara to make sure he didn’t give away the medical supplies. “I scrounged for those.” Cara had nodded. 

Jha’iil frowned at her. “K’olar.” 

“No, vod’ad. I’m staying here.” 

“K’olar! Come with!” He dropped his ears into his most pitiful expression. 

“I need to stay. But I will be here when you come back.” She rubbed his ear as his eyes began to fill with tears. “But I have something for you. It’s a surprise.” 

“Surprise?” One ear slowly raised slightly. 

“Mmmhmmm.” She showed him a datapad. “Look, this has all the songs you like best on it. All the ones I sing for you.” 

“Laar.” He looked at it wonderingly, and she tapped one of the options. 

“As I was walking all alane…” He gasped, and looked at Din, who nodded. 

“Thank you.” 

She gave him a conspiratorial grin. “You should be able to set it up to control it from your vambrace if it gets too annoying.” 

He huffed a laugh, and then started. “Oh, I almost forgot…” He went into the ship, and Teryn heard the weapons locker open as Jha’iil played with his data pad. She glanced at Cara. _Did you put the guns back?_ Cara shook her head. Of course she hadn’t. 

Dan came back holding the vambrace Teryn had found when they were going through it when they came to find him. “I had this made for your name day. I know it’s not for a few weeks, but… we might not be back by then.” 

She handed Jha’iil to Cara and took the vambrace. It replaced the one of her left arm, the one that didn’t have any controls on it. This one did. She put it on, and stepped back, and at a nod from Din activated it. 

A small energy shield, half a meter in diameter erupted from it. It was an older design- not many used it since the end of the Clone Wars. She looked at Din, speechless. “I thought… I thought you might want something that you could use to shield your head with.” 

“Vor entye, ori’vod… I don’t know what…” She flung her arms around his neck and he hugged back, slightly awkwardly. 

“Just take care of yourself. And….” He held up a finger. “No picking fights.” 

She glanced at Cara and twitched an eyebrow. “That still doesn’t sound like me.” Cara smirked, and pulled her into a hug. 

“Until our paths cross.” 

“Keep him on his toes, vod.” 

“I always do.” 

Jha’iil flung his arms around her neck. “Ret… ret…?” He looked at Din. 

“Ret’urcye mhi.” 

“Turshay mee.” 

Teryn and Din exchanged a smile. “Close enough.” 

Teryn and Lathorm had spent almost two days recording the songs, and her voice was tired. But there was still one more goodbye to get through. 

Cuan and the salvage team were planning on leaving obscenely early in the morning, and he’d had his gear packed and ready to go. She was asleep, actually asleep, when it was time to go, and he was reluctant to wake her up. Sleep was too precious a thing for her to waste. “Cyar’ika.” He nudged her gently- too gently, if he really wanted her to wake up. “It’s time.” 

She grumbled but didn’t wake. He sighed, tucked his cloak around her, and pressed a kiss to her head. “Ner kar’taylir darasuum, LaarSenaar. I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

She sighed in her sleep, then mumbled back, “Ner kar’taylir darasuum.” He froze, and then smiled to himself. There is truth when someone’s guard is down. She’d get there. He grabbed his bag and headed to the ship. 

When she woke up, hours later, she found a note. 

_LaarSenaar, I didn’t want to wake you up, you were sleeping so peacefully. Take care yourself, eat, and try to sleep, and_ please _try not to worry. I won’t bring back a girl this time. I’m very happy with the one I have._

_PS: It should be warm enough to go swimming when I get back_

She smiled, sadly, and buried her nose in his cloak. It smelled like him. 

On the salvage ship, Cuan unpacked some of his gear, and tucked into his bag, he found a datapad he had not packed. He frowned at it, and turned it on. There were thirty one files on it, and he opened the first one. 

“This is probably dumb, but…. you get a song for every day that you’re gone. And no, you impatient di’kut, you don’t get to skip ahead. If you get back before you run out, then I’ll unlock them all. Please be careful.” 

He sat down, and played the first song. 

“Follow the path  
To where no one's-"

_“Ugh this is stupid.”_

Lathorm’s voice came out, at a distance. _“No it’s not. Start over.”_

Cuan took a short, shaky breath. “No it’s not, cyar’ika. It’s not at all.”

"When every step  
Takes you a thousand miles away  
You'll find the edge  
Beyond the break of day  
And leave behind  
Everything you've ever had  
The one's you love  
The pillows in your bed

There you go  
There you go

What you call home  
Is a box of memories  
Forever lost  
But good enough to keep  
Cause you don't know  
What tomorrow holds for you  
Another path  
Or just a glimpse of truth.” 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Andrew's Song, by End of Silence and IMAScore: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RlNw9-MPY9Q
> 
> The "one song for every day that you're gone" is cribbed shamelessly from Crown Princess Victoria of Sweden and her husband Prince Daniel. Before they were married, she went on a diplomatic trip to China that lasted 30 days, and the night before she left, she wrote him a letter for each day she'd be gone. He talks about it during his wedding toast. I love those two very much. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EdEETlbTnLQ (He starts telling this story at 1:18) 
> 
> Mando'a Translations
> 
> riduur: Spouse  
> alor: Chief  
> ori’vod: older sibling  
> ne’tra gal: black ale - sweet, almost spicy black beer similar to milk stout  
> buy'ce gal: pint of ale - contents of helmet, actually a lot more than a pint!  
> ba’buir: Grandparent  
> vod’ika: Little sibling  
> Riduurok: love bond, specifically between spouses - marriage agreement  
> Vod: Comrade  
> vod’ad: Sibling's child  
> K’olar: Come here, come with  
> Laar: Song  
> Vor entye: Thank you  
> Ret’urcye mhi: Goodbye - lit. *Maybe we'll meet again*  
> Cyar’ika: Sweetheart, beleoved  
> Ner kar’taylir darasuum: I love you.  
> di’kut: idiot.  
> LaarSenaar: Songbird


	14. Though shadows fall, stars still find their way

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And now here Atriu was, an adult, a verd, and she still didn’t know shit. 
> 
> No one had warned her that adulthood was so frustrating. 
> 
> Lots of big parental feelings here.

As a rule, sentry duty on Samaki was boring. The valley the temple was in was half a continent away from the few cities and settlements the planet had, even though the planet was near (by outer rim reckoning) other systems, there wasn’t much there, so people mostly left it alone. There were early warning beacons set in various locations both on the planet and just off-world, and the sentries would keep an eye on those as well as anyone approaching the valley. 

Tuathal had remembered that there was a potential for a place for his Tribe to settle when they needed one, after the Purge, and sent people to check it out. No one questioned why he might have remembered- he was old, he’d heard and learned a great many things in his life. The Samaki Tribe had been there for several years- long enough that a number of their children didn’t remember anything else. 

Tuathal was fine with that. The Herd, and now the Navarro Foundlings were given the opportunity to grow up happy and safe, while still learning the Way. Well, a few Ways. 

While on the one hand taking the Creed and becoming an adult in the eyes of her Tribe was something Atriu had been looking forward to for as long as she could remember, the reality of being the lowest ranking soldier was incredibly boring. Sentry duty. KP. Endless drills. 

What were they even training for?

When she was little, she would sometimes fall asleep to her Buir, her ba’vodu and her ba’buir discussing things late into the night that she didn’t understand. Mandalore, they said. She'd never been there. Something about a saber of some kind. As she’d gotten older and they’d send her to her own room to go to sleep, sometimes she would sneak out to listen, but always fell asleep before they got to anything that was both interesting and understandable. 

And now here she was, an adult, a verd, and she still didn’t know shit. 

No one had warned her that adulthood was so _frustrating_. 

She was on sentry duty with one of the Navarro people. A woman, who probably had a name. It was boring, being up at the top of the valley where you could see if anyone was approaching, but of the ships that were off world, only one was expected anytime soon. And no one ever came, but as her training master had said, “A healthy amount of paranoia was healthy.” So they watched. Every night. 

She was still angry with her ba’vodu. Partly, she had the sense to admit, because he came back from that mission when her buir hadn’t. And then he shacked up with that healer- yes, she’d been told that the veriduur’s, _the whore's_ , name was… something… and her proper title was “al’baar’ur” but she didn’t care. Her ba’vodu Cuan was shacked up with some woman who didn’t even have a helmet and probably lied about why she didn't have it. And that woman let her buir die. 

And then they went and moved into the quarters she had lived in since they came to Samaki. Sure, Cuan and Rima had explained to her that one of the reasons they did that was so that it would stay in the family and she’d be able to go back to a familiar place if she wanted, and she knew she could not stay there alone- it was inappropriate for the lowest ranking verd to have quarters intended for a family- but to think of her room and her space being tainted by that veriduur…

Atriu blew out her nose in a frustrated huff, and then got disgusted, because she was wearing her helmet, and she wasn’t supposed to take it off while on duty. Life was very hard. 

H’lava watched the young Samaki woman she was assigned with with amusement. She remembered being newly minted in the Creed and having big feelings and not being used to wearing her helmet all the time. Yes, the kids she grew up with wore their helmets more and more often as they approached coming of age, but it was so easy to be able to pop it off to scratch your nose whenever you wanted until one day, you couldn’t. 

“I can turn around so you can take care of that.”

“What?”

“I can turn around. It’s no problem.” 

“You won’t think I’m dar’manda or whatever?” Atriu’s sneer was obvious. H’lava kept her chuckle to herself, and politely turned around. After a minute, she heard the unmistakable hiss of the helmet being released, and some other fussing sounds. Atriu sighed as she got herself sorted, and plopped her helmet back on. “Thanks.”

“Kih’parjai.” H’lava turned around again. Atriu grumbled. 

“Why do you have so much beskar?” They’d been told that the new people were from a poor covert that had to flee quickly, so they’d all been surprised to see that they had so much. 

H’lava tilted her head at the abruptness of the question. “Alor was able to salvage most of the armor when we had to leave Navarro.” 

Atriu was speechless. “You mean…”

“Yes. We have a lot of beskar because it was left behind by those marching far away.” H’lava’s helmet tilted as she narrowed her eyes. “Why do you ask?”

“We were just wondering.” Atriu said, defensively. “We have some, but so much of it is under Imp control.” 

“We mostly came from Concordia. The beskar mines are there.” 

“Oh.”

H’lava sat back. “We evacuated in a hurry during the Purge, but we were able to save some. And found more. Not a lot. But some.” _In a hurry_ didn’t even begin to encapsulate the chaos during those hours. But in the months before the invasion, the Armorers had all worked day and night to make as much armor as possible. Most of what they’d escaped with was on their backs. 

“Oh.” Atriu retreated back into silence for the rest of the watch.

After her sentry shift was over, Atriu found a bottle of tihaar that she’d squirreled away after the bonfire. It was near dawn, and drinking her feelings was perhaps not the smartest thing, but it was what she was going to do. 

Teryn had been trying to sleep. She really, really had. She was reluctant to take any sort of sleep aid when there was a chance that Lathorm would need her. Sleeping in their bed without Cuan was awful even curled up around his cloak. It was starting to lose his scent. 

So when someone attempted to open her door not long after dawn a week after Cuan left, she was already awake. It wasn’t Cuan, he would have sent a message that they were on their way. She had a sneaking suspicion she knew who exactly was at her door.

Sure enough, Atriu was at the door, with a mostly empty bottle, and, Teryn was relieved to see, a firm grip on her helmet. At least she wasn’t like her ba’vodu. 

“Why are you in my house.” Atriu peered at Teryn. 

Teryn considered the mess in front of her, and sighed. “Come on in. Let's get you some water.”

“I don’t need water.” Atriu sullenly took another swig from the bottle of tihaar. 

Teryn nodded. “Of course not.” 

Atriu staggered to the second sleeping room and looked in. “You haven’t got anything in here.”

“We haven’t decided what we’re doing with that space yet.” Teryn got a glass of water and held it out. “Drink this.”

“No. I don’t take things from a veriduur.” 

“Have you ever met one?”

Atriu glared darkly at Teryn. “One.” 

“Mmmhmmm.” 

“I’m talking about you.” 

“Yeah, I got that.” Teryn jerked her chin at a chair. “Sit down.” 

“Don’t wanna.” Atriu waved the bottle around, and was surprised when Teryn snatched it from her hand. “Hey!”

“I think you’ve had enough of that.” Teryn watched as Atriu slowly collapsed into a heap on the couch. “When are you supposed to be back on duty?”

“Later.” Atriu leaned her head back. “I miss my buir.” 

“I know. I miss mine, too.” 

“Why is he dead?” 

Teryn cocked her head, considering. “I can tell you medically, but I don’t think that’s what you’re really asking.” 

“I want him back and you killed him.” Atriu mumbled. Teryn sighed and rubbed her eyes. Dealing with a drunk, grieving 14 year old was not really on her agenda for the day, but here they were. Atriu’s eyes were already closing, and after wrestling with herself for a minute, Teryn covered her with a blanket.

Apparently hungover Tadascos were going to be a specialty. 

The rest of the morning proceeded as normal, with a bit of reading, breakfast, checking on Lathom, who’s boredom had not abated, even with the return of her riduur, Ranu. However, her numbers were remaining okay, much everyone’s relief. 

This was the first baby born in quite some time- the few Creedborns running around in the Herd had been born before they and their parents arrived on Samaki, so the excitement was running high. Rima had asked for updates, and Tuathal had implied that he would also like updates. Lathorm had reluctantly agreed to the reports if it meant that fewer people were bothering _her_. 

Teryn had turned to Ranu, and told him that it was his job to cater to Lathom’s whims and keep everyone away, and that if he had any problems, she would come and back him up. He had nodded gratefully, and then buried his nose in one of the many “how to take care of a baby” books he’d gotten while off-world. 

Teryn had kept her amusement to herself. 

She had decided not to tell Rima about her visitor quite yet. She’d checked a few times throughout the morning, and Atriu hadn’t moved much, and Teryn intended to have it out with her before bringing anything to any superior’s attention. While that was technically not how things should be done, Teryn justified it to herself by the slightly squishy fact that her superiors and Atriu’s superiors weren’t the same. Technically. 

Besides, if the kid got into trouble for missing muster, that was hardly Teryn’s problem. 

It was lunchtime when Atriu woke up. Atin had been watching her warily- he did not know this person, and Teryn had left her in their space without supervision, which was clearly a Mistake, and he would rectify this. Teryn had brought back food, but only for her. The odds of Atriu being able to deal with food were small, and also Teryn didn't want to. 

“Good morning. Or afternoon, rather.” 

Atriu looked around. “Why I am here?” 

“You tell me. You were the one who showed up drunk off your ass at dawn, called me a veriduur, and then passed out on my couch.” Teryn shrugged. “Lucky for you, I wasn’t asleep.” 

“Not your couch.” Atriu peered at the water glass and sat up so she could drink it. 

“Yeah, it is.” Teryn cocked her head. “You wanna have this out right now?” 

“Have what out?”

“You basically accused me of killing your buir. Multiple times. So. Let’s discuss that.” 

“You did kill him.”

“No, the people who attacked him and your ba’vodu killed him. I couldn’t save him. I did try, but there was nothing anyone could have done, possibly not even if they’d attacked him right next to a bacta tank.” Teryn sighed. “Sometimes you can try everything and it just doesn’t work.” 

“But I needed him.” 

“From everything everyone has told me about your buir, including your ba’vodu and your ba’buir, he was a fighter, and if he could have stayed, he would have.” 

“Is that the kind of shit they tell you to say?” 

“Yes, but that doesn’t make it less true.” Teryn took a deep breath, and continued on with the other thing she would tell people. “And you’ll see him in the manda.” 

Atriu sat back and narrowed her eyes at Teryn. “You won’t see yours.” 

Teryn froze and her eyes got flinty. Atriu squirmed- she could at least recognize that she’d gone too far, but in true teenager fashion, she could only recognize it after the fact. “No. I won’t.” 

“How’d you become dar’manda, anyway? The truth, not whatever you told Cuan so he’d fuck you.” Atriu jumped back when Atin hissed at her. It was hard to say if it was because he understood what she said, or her tone, or the sudden rush of anger that flowed off of Teryn. 

Teryn closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “Gods give me strength.” She glared at Atriu, who shrank back. “I haven’t told anyone that you’re here, including your ba’buir. But I will not be spoken to like this in my home. Get out.” 

“This is not your home! It’s mine!” 

“You have a place here, and you always will, but this is my home- _our_ home. I know you’re in pain, but you don’t get to act like this. You are not the first person to have lost their buir, and you won’t be the last.” Teryn opened the door. “Get out.” 

Atriu stood. “Are you going to tell them?”

“Yes.” 

“Bitch.” 

“Yes.” Teryn opened the door. “Out.” Atriu stomped out. Teryn twisted her mouth. The kid absolutely had a headache the size of the Kessel system, and she couldn’t bring herself to care. But it was time to give Tuathal a visit. 

“Ad’ika! Come in. I have freshly brewed behot.” Tuathal smiled and gestured for Teryn to come into his quarters. They were warmer than most people tended to keep them, as usual.

“I brought some of the salve for your joints.” 

“Ah, good. Thank you.” He cocked his head. “How are you? You seem troubled.” 

“I had a visitor early this morning.” Teryn poured two mugs of behot and handed him one. He politely pretended that he couldn’t tell she was giving him a once over. She politely pretended that she wasn’t. “Your bu’ad…. Bu’ad’ad? She showed up after her sentry shift drunk off her ass.” 

“Ah.” Tuathal sighed and sat down in his favorite chair. “She isn’t dealing with things well.” 

“No. She is not. She’s pretty angry, and has decided that I’m the reason for all of it.” Teryn sighed. “I don’t know what she needs, but she’s not getting it right now.” 

“I’ll talk to her. Have you gone to Rima yet?” 

“Not yet. But I will. I let her sleep it off to see if that improved her disposition any, and it really didn’t.” Teryn looked down at her hands. “I don’t want to get her into trouble, but…”

“She has the ability to be devastating when she wants to.” Tuathal sighed again. “I imagine she got personal.” 

“Quite.” 

“I’ll talk to her, and Rima will, as well.” He patted Teryn’s hands. “She’ll come around. But how are you? Are you sleeping?” 

Teryn shook her head and huffed in mild irritation. “Everyone asks me that.” 

“Because everyone knows you aren’t sleeping well. I can tell, and I’m blind.” 

“Are you? Sometimes I’m not so sure.” 

Tuathal smiled. “My eyes don’t work. The rest of my senses, though…” He paused. “May I make a suggestion? For the sleeping problem?” 

Teryn shrugged. “Sure.” 

“Try to imagine yourself in a place where you felt safe. Do you have a place like that?” 

Teryn frowned. Her childhood home on Concordia had been safe, until it wasn’t. And nowhere she had been since had felt safe, not really. Her little house on Panoog had been, but it was now associated with the planet being razed. But there had been a spot in the woods in Concordia....

“Before you try to sleep tonight, imagine yourself there. Imagine yourself walking through it, touching things, and make it as real as possible. This was a place you were safe, and can be again.” His voice had slid into a soothing rhythm. “It can’t hurt, and it might help. Give it a try.” 

Teryn was dubious, to say the least. “I will.” She might.

Tuathal hummed. “Rima….” he started. 

Teryn rolled her eyes. “Does no one in this society know how to keep their damn mouths shut?” 

He barked a laugh. “No, and we never have. Not in my lifetime.” He grinned, then got serious again. “She told me what she asked you. Do you want to talk about it?”

“No. There’s nothing to talk about.” 

It took a couple more nights before Teryn was desperate enough to give his suggestion a try. It wasn’t that she didn’t think the theory was sound- it might work. But any place that had been safe had always become not safe, in the end. But finally, she curled around Cuan’s cloak and let herself think of the deep woods, the trees, the sounds of the night. 

She dreamed.

She dreamed of a bombed out building, and the body of a dead dog outside of it, and saw a Mandalorian warrior approach the dog. She took a breath- she knew that armor. She knew it better than her own. Out of the building a tiny, filthy child ran, shrieking. 

The warrior picked up the struggling child, turned, and faced her. Teryn bit back a sob. “Buir.” 

“Su cuy’gar, ner jai’galaar’ika.” 

Jha walked forward, holding the little girl, and Teryn closed her eyes. She hadn’t dreamed of her buir since just after the Purge. When she opened her eyes again, Jha was still there, but the tiny child was gone, and they were deep in the woods of Concordia. 

Teryn looked back at her buir, then looked down at herself. She wasn’t wearing her armor, just the basic tunic and pants she’d favored on Panoog, the fur cloak she’d covered herself with before she and Din rejoined the Covert.

“Ad’ika, it’s good to see you.” 

“Is it?” Teryn felt the tears start to fall and she heaved out a sob. “I thought….”

Jha held out her arms and Teryn ran into them, just as she had countless times before. She’d grown taller than her buir, but in dream logic, she was able to bury her face in Jha’s shoulder. “Oh, ad’ika, ner cyare, cyar’ika.” 

Teryn sobbed. “Bu, I’m so sorry.” 

“For what?” Jha held her daughter and stroked her hair. “For what? You’ve done nothing wrong.” 

“I broke…” 

“You broke nothing. You did what you needed to do.” 

Teryn pulled back. “But…”

“My little shreikhawk.” Jha took Teryn’s face in her hands, and even in the dream, Teryn shrank back. Jha tilted her head sadly. “Tell me. Did you choose to remove your helmet?” 

“No.” 

“Was it in combat?” 

“Not really.” 

“Did you still hold to the Resol’nare even after?”

Teryn looked down, and Jha put a finger under her chin to make her look up. “As best I could.” 

“You have nothing to be sorry for.” Jha paused, and considered, and then took off her own helmet. 

While technically, parents and children could still be unhelmeted in front of each other once the children swore the Creed, in practice it was only done rarely. Teryn hadn’t seen Jha’s face since the night before she’d taken the oath. It wasn’t exactly as she thought she remembered it. It was almost blurry, as if the twenty-odd years had dulled the memory. 

“Bu, no…” Teryn held up a hand and stopped. This was a dream. It wasn’t real. 

“Of course this is a dream. That doesn’t make it less real.” Jha touched Teryn’s hair. “I like this.” 

Teryn parroted the same line she’d given to H’lava, back in the Covert on Jelucan. “There had to be some trade off.” Her lip trembled. “I thought you'd be ashamed of me.” 

“Never.” Jha shook her head. “Never. Ner kar’ta, you were so lonely.” 

“I missed you. I missed Din.” Teryn started to sob again. 

“I missed you both, too. I have to be patient, for you… all of you, that ad’ika of your ori’vod’s will be a while.” 

“But Bu….” Teryn shook her head. “I won’t… I don’t… I can’t.” 

Jha took Teryn back into her arms. “The universe is not so unkind as all that.” 

“It seems pretty fucking unkind to me.” 

“It has been.” Teryn let her buir hold her, rocking and humming quietly. “Do you want to wear a helmet again?”

“What I want doesn’t matter.” 

“Ner kar’ta, it’s the only thing that matters. What do you want?” 

“I don’t know.” 

Jha hummed again. “Tell me about your Kurs’khaded.” 

“He’s… he’s more than I deserve. He’s smart… sometimes. And good. And brave. And funny.” 

“Humph. Are you perhaps more than he deserves? I suspect your ori’vod thinks so.” 

Teryn snorted. “He’s overprotective. You made sure of that.” 

“I regret nothing.” Jha smiled. “And do you love him?” 

Teryn froze, the answer on the tip of her tongue and refusing to go further. She did. She absolutely did. But admitting it out loud… “I…”

Jha tilted her head. “Mmmhmmm. He loves you.” 

“He’s going… he’ll realize that I’m…” Teryn shook her head. “And then it’ll be over.” 

“Ner jai’galaar’ika, he’s known exactly who you are since the beginning, and he’s never wavered.” Jha took Teryn’s hands. “He’ll walk through fire for you- he already has, in a way. Don’t doubt him.” 

Teryn swallowed and nodded. Knowing a thing and believing it weren’t the same, but she’d try. She owed Cuan that, and she owed Jha that. 

“Back to you. What do you want?”

Teryn was silent for a while, and the sounds of forest filled the space. “I want a place to belong.” 

“Do you want to reaffirm the Creed?” 

“Buir…” Teryn covered her face, and her shame. “Bu, I don’t know if I can put it on again. I know that makes me a coward…”

“No. No, knowing your limits doesn’t make you a coward. Of course the thought of putting it on would be hard. But you have the option now. It’s your choice, perhaps more than it was the first time. Swearing at 14 is… you didn’t know anything else. Of course you’d choose to follow your aliit, and your ori’vod.” Jha smiled again. “You would have followed him anywhere. And now you’re a grown woman twenty one years later. You know what you’d be choosing.” 

Teryn nodded slowly. “I… but…”

“There is more than one way to keep to the Resol’nare, ner kar’ta.” Jha touched her forehead to Teryn’s and while Teryn tensed and held her breath, she managed to not pull away, but only barely. “Kyr’tsad is only one. There are many Ways, ad’ika, but they go the same direction.” 

There was a thumping in the distance, and a voice calling through the woods. Jha picked up her helmet. “You have to go. Tell your ori’vod that I look forward to his stories when he gets here. I’m so proud of both of you.” She put on her helmet, and Teryn looked down at herself to see that she was now in her armor, with the shield vambrace, and the mudhorn signet was attached to her pauldron. 

Jha put her hands on Teryn’s shoulders, and took one last look at her daughter. “Ner kar’tylir darasuum, ner cyare jai’galaar’ika. Urcye mhi.” 

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mando'a Translations
> 
> Buir: parent  
> ba’vodu: Parent's sibling  
> ba’buir: Grandfather  
> verd: soldier  
> veriduur: Courtesan, but Atriu means "whore."  
> al’baar’ur: Doctor  
> dar’manda: a state of not being Mandalorian - not an outsider, but one who has lost his heritage, and so his identity and his soul - regarded with absolute dread by most traditionall-minded Mando'ade  
> Kih’parjai: No problem  
> tihaar: alcoholic drink - strong clear spirit made from fruit, like eau de vie  
> anda: the collective soul or heaven - the state of being Mandalorian in mind, body and spirit - also supreme, overarching, guardian-like  
> behot: herb used in beverages, mildly antiseptic and stimulating  
> bu’ad: Grandchild (so bu'ad'ad would be great-grandchild)  
> Su cuy’gar: Hello (lit: You're still alive.)  
> ner: My  
> jai’galaar’ika: Little shriekhawk  
> Ad’ika: Little one  
> cyare: beloved  
> cyar’ika: Sweetheart  
> Bu: The diminutive for Buir. In this case, T means "mama"  
> kar’ta: Heart  
> ori’vod: Big brother  
> Kurs’khaded: Wolf  
> aliit: Clan, family  
> Kyr’tsad: Death Watch  
> Ner kar’tylir darasuum: I love you  
> Urcye mhi: The way to say goodbye in Mando'a is Ret'urcye mhi, which translates to "Maybe we'll meet again." Take away the "Ret" and that takes away the "maybe."


	15. The rain has moved on and left a new day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TIME FOR SOME AGENCY.

_“Ner kar’tylir darasuum, ner cyare jai’galaar’ika. Urcye mhi.”_

The thumping continued when Teryn opened her eyes. Cuan’s cloak was wet where she had it pillowed under her cheek, and she took several deep breaths to orient herself. It was a dream, wasn’t it? Just a dream. But it had felt so real.

_“Of course this is a dream. That doesn’t make it less real.”_

It took a few seconds for her to realize the yelling and the thumping had been from her own door. In a split second she was awake and padded to see what was going on, Atin following. This part of her training had become so ingrained- needing to wake up quickly and be functional when needed. Tabor was panting, holding on the wall. “We need you.”

Teryn nodded and ushered him into the main room while she went back into the sleeping room to get dressed. “What happened?” 

“The… her… the pregnant woman? I don’t know her rank or title…” 

“OUT WITH IT.” Cara was a little bit right. Names did make things easier sometimes.

“Her numbers all went red and she has a bad headache and vomiting. The healer isn’t sure…”

Teryn gathered her hair into a knot on top of her head and shoved her feet into her boots. “Let’s go.” Tabor hesitated, and she glanced down- she didn’t have any armor on at all. She sighed, heavily, and yanked on the battle skirt- it wouldn’t get in the way and didn’t require any of the undergear. “Happy?”

“Uh….” Tabor hesitated, and then nodded at her glare. “Yes.” 

Teryn rolled her eyes and they ran for the med bay. Lathorm was there, looking pale, and scared, one arm covering her belly protectively, and Ranu, who was clearly prepared to fight something.

Teryn gave them both her best reassuring smile, all the while knowing that it wasn’t going to calm them at all. “Let’s see what we have. How do you feel?” 

“Not great.” Lathorm pressed her other hand to her head while Teryn looked over the numbers. 

“Well, you’re gonna have a baby soon. Tonight, hopefully. As soon as we can get them out.” 

“I’m not ready.” Lathom shook her head. “I don’t have….everything ready.” 

“The baby would rather stay put, as well, but we all gotta learn early on that sometimes you have to do things you don’t want to do.” Teryn grinned. “You’re gonna be fine. First couple of weeks? Mostly they just stay attached to you.” 

“So it’s not that different.”

“Different kinds of mess.” Teryn patted her hand. “We’re gonna try to induce, because I’d rather not have to go in if I don’t have to.” 

“I think I’d like that too.” Lathom whispered, and Ranu nodded. 

“It’s gonna be fine.” Teryn nodded at Tabor and Roccan. “Would it be alright with you if they stayed? They need to learn, and well…” She shrugged apologetically. “You are the only example we have.”

Lathom nodded. 

“We can make them leave at any point.” Teryn looked firmly at Lathorm and Ranu. “I’m on your side first and foremost. Anyone else can kiss my ass.” 

They both smiled at that. Everyone -EVERYONE- knew the al’baar’ur was skittish and shy, and they’d never seen Cuan Tadasco quite so protective of _anyone_. She was wary, and quiet, and kept to herself. Except when it came to her work- there she had no doubts or apologies about her abilities or decisions. She was confident without being cocky. Even Roccan would defer to her on some topics, and always treated her as a respected colleague. That had been unexpected.

No one actually knew her name, but she seemed to prefer it that way. And no one knew- for sure- why she was from this conservative Tribe but didn’t have a helmet, but had armor. She was a conundrum for many. 

“We haven’t gotten the amulet yet.” At Teryn’s questioning frown, Ranu elaborated. “We need a beskar amulet for the baby. And we… hadn’t had it made yet. We thought we’d have more time.” 

Teryn raised an eyebrow. “Cutting it a bit close.” She began to get the things for inducing together- fortunately, by some miracle, they had some of the right medications in stock. If they didn’t work, then surgery was needed. But they could blow up that bridge when they came to it. 

“I was afraid something would go wrong, and….” Ranu gently put a hand on Lathorm's cheek and she smiled up at him. “I know we need one when they're born, but… I was worried that would be chancing fate.” 

Teryn nodded. She could understand that. “There is probably someone lurking around outside who can be made useful by running to your Armorer.” She jerked her chin at Tabor, who she could just tell grinned at that. Watching his al’baar’ur boss people around was his favorite thing. 

Sadet had brought over the amulet himself, and then immediately left again when Lathrom called Ranu a fucking turd for getting her into this predicament. “Too many feelings in there,” he’d muttered to Teryn as he made his escape.

It was a long night for everyone, but just after dawn, the newest member of Samaki tribe made her way into the galaxy, shrieking her dismay at her sudden change in circumstances. Teryn wrapped up the baby and presented her to her. “I’ll go let them know- and keep anyone out as long as I can.” 

Lathom and Ranu nodded, staring down at their tiny new baby. “Thank you.” They wrapped the baby’s hand around the mythosaur amulet. 

Teryn smiled. “This is the best thing I ever get to do.” 

Outside the medbay, the bulk of the Tribe had gathered, plus several of the Navarro tribe. A birth was a rare thing. Teryn paused, uncertain of the protocol. Rima, helmeted, stepped forward. “Well?”

“Everyone is healthy, though the baby is small and…” she swallowed and managed to force out a name, “Ranu...might need some… fortification. The baby appears to be a girl, but she'll let us know in time.” 

Rima let out a shout of approval, and the rest of the Tribe echoed it. Teryn stood in the door, and glared daggers at anyone who got too close. The baby would need a lot of care, but she could give the three of them a few minutes on their own before their Tribe descended on them. 

It was a good start to the day. 

So far the hunting was going well. Karga had been happy to see Jha’iil, and perversely, the man had a present for him. “It’s been about a year since you… acquired him… that’s like a life day.” 

It was the noisiest toy Din could imagine- ridiculous, if he thought about it. A board that had flips and switches and buttons and levers and some of them lit up and most of them made sounds -all sorts of sounds, very loud sounds- and Jha’iil loved it. He would play with it for hours. He would even use his powers to play with it. Din, after some intense internal wrestling, had decided to be okay with it- he was learning control, and it would tire him out a bit. 

Cara, who was clearly a conspirator on this, also had an appallingly loud present- a small toy set of controls for the Razor Crest that could be set up on his carrier in the cockpit. It was also noisy, but he could at least adjust the volume. Jha’iil was very happy “helping” fly the ship, which made take-offs and landings much easier for all concerned. 

But his favorite thing was still the datapad with the songs on it. He’d figured out how to control it himself, and would listen happily as he went to sleep. Din admitted to himself that it was nice to have. Teryn hadn’t just included Mandalorian songs, but all different ones she’d learned in her time...away. 

He still felt guilty about that. 

On their first check in on Navarro, he’d quietly asked Cara to find him some books or treatises on Jedi and, he felt almost ashamed asking for it, Mandalorian history if she could find any. The talk with Tuathal had made him realize he didn’t know much, and he was beginning to suspect what he did know...well, it might not be complete. Cara had raised her eyebrows, but agreed. A Mandalorian looking into Mandalorian history might be memorable, and he wanted to avoid that. 

When he brought his first set bounties back for payment, Cara had found a few things. 

“Finding stuff on the Jedi is… hard. It’s like they’ve been scrubbed from the datafiles.” She shook her head. “I almost suspect that I know more than anyone out here because I grew up on a Core World, and they just didn’t make it out to the Outer Rim all that often, but occasionally, if you ask the right person, they’ll get a flash of recognition, and then they look scared, and they clam up.” 

“That’s…odd.” 

“I know.” Cara shrugged. “I found a few things that might be helpful, maybe. And a history file that discusses the Mandalorian Civil War. Well, one of them. T and… what’s his name, Socks? They said that Mando history was a mess, and I don’t know how biased this is… but it’s a start.” 

Din nodded, frowning to himself. “It is. Thank you.” 

Once the early morning revelry had settled down, and Lathorm and the baby were sleeping, Teryn took a mug of behot and went into the woods to regroup.

The dream- it stayed with her. She felt comforted in a way that she hadn’t felt… ever. And she felt lighter. If nothing else, if absolutely nothing else, Jha wasn’t ashamed of her. A part of the shame she’d carried for eleven years was that she’d let her buir down, after everything Jha had done for her. 

Her buir still loved her. Her buir had said they would see each other again. For the moment, that would be enough. 

There were other things that needed attention.

Teryn paced in a circle outside several times before turning to the Forge… the Samaki forge. Sadet was there, and tilted his head in a question. She took a deep breath, and then let the question tumble out of her mouth so there was no possibility of her biting it back. “Can you attach this, please?”

She held out the mudhorn signet. 

He picked it up and looked at her. “Expected you’d want to go to your own for something like this.” 

“I…. have my reasons.” They all involved not wanting to explain anything, especially if Din hadn’t told the Armorer who that signet was for. Maybe she thought it was for Jha’’iil. But Din had given it to her, and she could have attached by whomever she wanted. 

Sadet had nodded, and then held out a hand. She tilted her head slightly. He sighed and waved his hand again. “Your pauldron. I need it.” 

“Oh.” She handed him her right pauldron. He took it with a vaguely annoyed grumble, and looked at the signet. “This your clan?”

She swallowed hard and nodded. “Yeah.” 

He nodded, and carefully began to attach it, while Teryn just breathed. _He gave it to you, that means he wanted you to wear it. This isn’t deciding that other thing one way or the other. Everyone pretty much considers this to be how it is, anyway._

When he finished, Sadet picked up the pauldron and turned it over in his hands. “This is good work. I hadn’t had the chance to look at it up close yet.” He turned and stared at Teryn for a long time, and she shifted uncomfortably. “What do you do to protect your head?” 

“...duck?” 

“Humph.” He walked over to reattach the pauldron and she traced over the mudhorn signet with her fingers. It was such a small thing to carry so much weight. Sadet circled around her and made some considering noises. “You keeping this?” he picked up one of her braids, cocking his head critically, and she smacked his hand. 

“What? Yes.” 

“Hmmm. I’ll think about it.” He dropped the braid and turned back to the Forge.

She stared for several seconds before shaking her head sharply. “Think about what?” Sadet waved his hand in dismissal. Teryn paused, raised her hands in metaphorical defeat, and went to see if Rima was around. 

“Maybe you can help. I have this-” Teryn demonstrated the shield vambrace, “But I don’t know the techniques for it.” 

Rima raised her eyebrows, impressed. “I don’t think anyone here is familiar with those. Wasn’t really in our repertoire. Your Armorer made it?” At Teryn’s nod, Rima shrugged. “Surely she wouldn’t have made it if there wasn’t anyone who could train you.” 

Teryn wrinkled her nose in annoyance and nodded. Rima was probably right, but Teryn really was hoping to avoid talking to the Armorer. “How’s…” she grinned a bit viciously, “The vaar’ika?” 

Rima barked out a laugh. “She’s been confined to quarters when she’s not on duty. She knows she fucked up.” 

“She really did.” Teryn smirked. “I would have given her help for her hangover if she hadn’t been such a shabuir. Her ba’vodu can tell her about how great the remedy is.” 

Rima grinned back. “How’s the baby?”

“She’s doing well. Strong. Grumpy. She’ll fit in just fine.” 

Cuan and the salvage crew walked through the remains of his ship. He told himself he hadn’t expected to find much left, but the reality was he’d let himself hope a little bit. He and Arkil had spent years tweaking this thing, and now… now it was a shell. 

He sighed, and rummaged through one of the storage lockers. It had been Arkil’s, and if he remembered correctly there was a hidden compartment… yes. Arkil had hidden a small box there. It was wooden, and unassuming, and if any looters had found it, they had dismissed it as no value. 

In a way, they were right. In another way… he opened the box, and there was a small bag of dirt. Dirt from Mandalore, that Arkil had managed to shake off his boots when they escaped during the Purge. He nodded to himself. Atriu should have this. She’d never seen Mandalore; she was one of the first Foundlings that came after. She should have something from their home. 

He hoped his Songbird was doing okay. 

Teryn went to go see Tuathal before she went to see the Armorer. She liked visiting with him, even if he was disconcerting in almost everything he said. 

“Ad’ika!” He smiled a greeting, then reached out and ran his fingers down her right pauldron. “What’s this?”

She gave him a strongly doubtful side-eye. “It’s… it’s the signet of my ori’vod’s clan. Um. Our clan, I guess.” 

He smiled. “Have you decided, then?”

“No.” 

“No, or no you haven’t decided?” He tilted his head, barely suppressing his smile. 

“You already know the answer, clearly,” she said drily. “You realize it’s spooky when you do that?”

“Yes, which is why I don’t with people who can’t handle it. Sit.” 

“The baby is fine, she’s strong and will make a good warrior someday.” She smiled and sat. “I applaud your restraint for not asking right away.” 

He hummed. “I knew you’d fill me in. Please ask Lathorm and Ranu when I can visit.” 

Teryn nodded, and twisted her fingers together. “I had a dream the other night.” 

“Oh?”

“I tried meditating, like you… well. I dreamed about my buir. We had a talk about a lot of things.” 

He nodded. “Go on.”

“She... she said she was waiting for us… all of us, my ori’vod, his ad’ika -she said he would be a while-” she took a shaky breath. “And me. She said she was waiting for me, and I don’t… she said the universe wasn’t that unkind.” 

“And you're asking…?”

“Is she right? Or was that just some... wishful bullshit my head came up with?” 

He sighed, and took her gloved hands. “Ultimately I don’t know. I believe, as we all do, that we have a connection to the manda, and we’ll join it. Now, I know that you believe what happened to you, what was _done_ to you, has severed that connection. That it removed your soul.” He paused, allowing her the space to comment, to make her usual protestation that she didn’t have a soul, but she said nothing. “Well, I don’t believe that is true. I told you before that I can see the light in you, and I can also tell you that it isn’t as constricted as it was before.” 

“She said… she said that there were many Ways, but they all go the same direction.” 

“She sounds like she was a wise woman. I wish I could have met her.” He gave a wistful smile. “I will, in time.” 

“Not too soon.” Teryn squeezed his hands. “I won’t allow it.” 

He squeezed her hand back. “There is no final answer to your question, but you’re asking it. Which means something.” He tilted his head at the door. 

There was a hesitating shuffle, and then a knock, and the door opened. Atriu came in, holding her helmet. “Rima thought I would find you here,” she said to Teryn, looking nervous.

Teryn raised an eyebrow and sat back, waiting to see what happened next. 

“I’m sorry for being so… terrible... before.” 

Teryn nodded. “Thank you.”

“I shouldn’t have said those things. Especially the part about you being a…” Atriu glanced sideways at Tuathal and mouthed, “veriduur.” 

By some miracle, Teryn managed to keep a straight face, but a tell-tale twitch started in her jaw.

“Bu’ad.” Tuathal said it mildly, and Atriu hung her head. 

“I know it wasn’t your fault my buir didn’t come home. I was just…”

“Angry. I know.” 

“Anyway. N’eparavu takisit.” Atriu gave her ba’buir’s forehead a quick touch with her own and ran out. 

Teryn gave a pleased and slightly amused sigh. “That’s a start.” 

“She really called you a veriduur? Again?”

“A couple times.” 

Tuathal sighed in disappointment. “That child. She’ll grow up, I just hope we survive it.” 

  
  


After much dithering, and fussing, and, she admitted to herself, stalling, Teryn finally went to the Navarro Forge. The Armorer was working, and Teryn sat down, happy for the gloves that kept her palms from being so sweaty. 

It was ridiculous, really, but the simple fact was that despite everything the Armorer had done for her over the past few months, and it was only a few months, that didn’t change what had happened before. Being with the much more accepting Samaki Tribe was making it more and more clear that her place wasn’t really with her own Tribe. 

Were they still her own Tribe? It was hard to say.

Teryn was also _angry,_ and realizing that anger now outweighed the shame she’d felt for so long was… that was something. And a good deal of that anger was focused on the Armorer, fair or not. So no, she hadn’t wanted to do this if it could be avoided. 

After a few minutes, the Armorer sat down across from her. She glanced first at the vambrace, and nodded approvingly. Then she saw the signet and stilled. 

“Ah.” 

“My ori’vod gave it to me.” Teryn raised her chin defensively. 

“Indeed.” 

The Armorer wasn’t entirely surprised that Teryn had gone to the other Armorer to have it attached. She was a little surprised that it had taken so long, and she was also surprised to realize that she felt _hurt_ by being passed over. 

That was something to think about. 

“I understand the other Tribe has grown by one.”

“Yes. Healthy and strong.” 

“I’m sure they are grateful to you.” 

Teryn tilted her head and narrowed her eyes. “They are.”

“Good. How can I help you?” There was a little stress on the “how.” 

Teryn held up her vambrace. “I have this now, thank you, but… I don’t know how to use it most effectively.” 

The Armorer nodded. This conversation was one she had been expecting, and was both looking forward to it and dreading it at the same time. “It can be formidable if wielded correctly.”

“Well,” Teryn set her shoulders firmly. “Yes. I would like to be able to wield it correctly. Armor and self-defense, and all.” _I’ve been keeping the Resol’nare, in my way. My Way._

“Hmmmm. So you need to be trained properly.” 

“I do.”

“As it happens, there is one who can do that.” Teryn nodded, and the Armorer allowed herself a bit of a smile. This was either going to be fun, or a disaster, and either way, it would provide weeks of entertainment. “You won’t like who it is, however.”

Teryn paused, frowning, and then realization dawned. “Oh, fuck me.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ner kar’tylir darasuum: I love you  
> ner: My  
> cyare: beloved  
> jai’galaar’ika: Little shreikhawk  
> Urcye mhi: The way to say goodbye in Mando'a is Ret'urcye mhi, which translates to "Maybe we'll meet again." Take away the "Ret" and that takes away the "maybe."  
> al’baar’ur: Doctor  
> buir/buire: parent/parents  
> behot: herb used in beverages, mildly antiseptic and stimulating  
> shabuir: extreme insult - *jerk*, but much stronger  
> ba’vodu: parent's sibling  
> ori’vod: older brother  
> manda: the collective soul or heaven - the state of being Mandalorian in mind, body and spirit - also supreme, overarching, guardian-like  
> veriduur: technically courtesan, but Atriu means "whore."  
> Bu’ad: Grandchild  
> N’eparavu takisit: I'm sorry ("I eat my insult")  
> ba’buir: Grandparent (yes, yes, Tuathal is her great-grandparent, but stacking gets tiring)


	16. The right to be a little bit naughty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Escape Night Part 2! (find the story of Escape Night part one here, in the Dar'Manda One Shots: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23262868 )
> 
> The oldest kids of both tribes bust out for some ill-advised fun. 
> 
> Din has some second thoughts. Jha'iil has a temper tantrum.

Teryn went to the Navarro training room early and stretched out. This was going to be a fucking nightmare. The door opened while she had her back to it, and there was a sound of annoyed disgust. She turned around and glared at Paz. 

He glared back. “You still should cut that off.” He gestured at her head.

She had her hair braided up around her head, so it wasn’t easy to grab. “You still can get fucked.” 

He looked at the signet on her pauldron and made a small growl. “You have a shield emitter.”

“Yes.” She lifted her chin. 

“And you don’t know how to use it.” He sounded annoyed. 

“It was a gift.” She shrugged. “I asked for help.” 

“Smart.” He tossed her a blaster. “Practice blaster. Lowest setting won’t hurt.” She looked at it, then looked at him speculatively. He raised his hands, “...wait.” She took aim, and fired several shots at his head, and three bounced off his helmet before he ducked. 

She smirked. “Just checking.”

Maybe this would be fun, after all. 

The oldest Foundlings and the oldest Herd members had compared notes. The safety of the valley meant there was no real opportunity for escape night type shenanigans, but the Navarro Foundlings were determined to figure something out, especially for the ones that had never had the opportunity. The Herd, for their part, thought that escape night sounded like the best fun ever. 

“It was!” 

There was the main Temple building, of course, but everyone knew that the Herd tried to find a way in there regularly. That wasn’t new or exciting. But… there was, at the very top of valley, a gigantic rock fall, like an entire side of the valley had sheared away and been left in a crumpled heap. 

“We’re not supposed to go there,” one of the Samaki Herd said. “They said it’s dangerous.” 

“ _Perfect._ ”

The Foundlings laid out the rules: only people older than 10. The adults were not to know. “This might be harder for you than it was for us since you have so many more adults.” Faris mused. 

“We’ll figure it out. When should we do this?”

“We would go when the moon was dark, but it was a city, there was still light so we could see where we were going.” 

“The moon is full tonight.” 

“So we go tonight.” 

“We go tonight.” 

They arranged to meet at midnight at the edge of the training field, buckets on. The three Navarro Foundlings were able to easily slip away. Paz was in a foul mood, and wasn’t inclined to pay attention to anything Faris was doing, other than to give him an affectionate thwap on the helmet as Faris said good night. He and the others snuck out, circling the edge of the compound. 

The eight trainees in the Herd had a harder time of it. After discussing it endlessly, they agreed on a staggered exit, which meant that the last one out was supposed to bring a snack for the ones that had to sneak out early. It...mostly worked, until Seviju, who had the job to get the snacks, ran in Atriu in the kitchens. 

“What are you doing here?” 

“Nothing.” Seviju paused in filling a pack with shuner and nuts and tilted his head speculatively. “What are _you_ doing here?”

“....nothing.” Atriu was there to get a late night snack. She was still technically confined to her barracks, but the snack options there were limited, so she’d snuck out to the main kitchen. She glanced Seviju up and down. He was still dressed, with boots, and had his helmet with him. 

Seviju narrowed his eyes and sidled to the door. “I didn’t see shit.” Everyone knew that Atriu wasn’t supposed to be out, certainly not this late at night. 

Atriu nodded. “I didn’t see shit, either.” Seviju nodded back and darted out the door.

Atriu shoved a handful of berries in her mouth and considered. There was clearly something going on, and while it might be playing with fire to find out what it was, her instincts said to follow them. She ran to the barracks, where everyone was asleep or in the common room, grabbed her helmet, and snuck out. 

Following them wasn’t hard with the infrared scanner in her helmet. Sneaking quietly was slightly more difficult, but they weren’t paying much attention to anyone who might be following them. The Herd had taken their training master’s words to heart about learning how to be sneaky from the Navarro Foundlings, and they slipped through the woods in strike team formation.

At the foot of the rock fall, they considered their next move. The fall spanned at least 700 meters, and went 100 meters up, in many levels of broken rock. The moon lit the fall, and they agreed to stay low, at least this first time, and took off running. They scrambled up the rockfall and then started to run and leap from broken rock to broken rock. 

Atriu frowned to herself. The rock fall wasn’t very stable, and while the Samaki Herd generally grew up with what seemed to be a benevolent neglect, she had realized as she had grown up that there was always someone around to keep an eye on them, and to redirect when they started doing something that seemed ill-advised.

To Atriu’s mind, this seemed really ill-advised, and she was completely over her head. She needed an adult. She ran back to the compound. 

Teryn wasn’t sleeping, as usual- the dreams about Gideon hadn’t abated at all once Cuan left, even with Atin taking a protective position every night between her and the door. But it was a nice night, the moon was out, and she was sitting with Atin outside, listening to the night. Atin spent part of each day waiting at Din and Jha’iil’s quarters, and went to the creche at least once, but every night he came back to Teryn. 

Atin looked up from where he had been lounging on her lap and hissed. Teryn glanced over and saw someone in the shadows. “Who’s there?”

Atriu hesitantly came forward, and Atin sat up, growling quietly. Teryn kept a firm on the back of his neck, and Atriu looked at him warily.b “I… I think I need some help.” 

Teryn gave Atin a gentle shove out of her lap and stood up. “What’s happened?” 

“The trainees… the kids? They all snuck out and are climbing on the rock fall. Eight of ours and three of yours.” 

“The big one?” At Atriu’s nod Teryn shrugged slightly. “Our Foundlings have been sneaking out for years, but the adults knew and kept an eye on them.” 

“Do they know this time? I didn’t see anyone…” 

“I don’t know. But we can find out.” Teryn tilted her head. “Aren’t you still supposed to be confined to quarters?” 

“...yeah.” Atriu squirmed. “But….”

“You did the right thing. I’ll back you up on this.” She started walking quickly towards the Navarro building. “Put your bucket on.” 

Atriu did, and Teryn glanced in the common room. Paz was there, methodically cleaning his repeating rifle. “Al’verde?” Paz grunted, and Teryn gave Atriu a quick eye roll. “Are you aware of escape night plans tonight?”

“No. Where are they gonna go?”

“The rockfall at the top of the valley, apparently. Ours and theirs.” 

“Fuck.” Paz stood up. “My fucking adiik with them?” 

“I assume so. He is the oldest.” 

“Do anyone from the other Covert know about this tradition?”

Teryn shrugged. “I don’t know.” Paz looked at her incredulously, and she shrugged again. “I haven’t talked to many of them. Not about… I haven’t.” 

“That’s surprising.” 

“Is it?” This was not the time to get into it as they walked over to Kewe’s quarters. The al’verde bajur answered within three knocks, and had clearly been asleep. 

“Do you know where your trainees are?” Paz didn’t waste time with niceties.

“At home, I would assume.” Kewe glared at Atriu. “You aren’t supposed to be out.” 

Paz sighed heavily and Teryn stepped in front of Atriu. “We can deal with that later. Right now, your trainees are out running the rock fall.” 

“What?”

“They snuck out!” Paz snapped. “Ours used to. Didn't think they would here. Where would they go?”

“I saw them,” Atriu said quietly. “I saw them sneak out and I followed them. They said they were going to run it.” 

Kewe blinked several times, then turned and went back inside. He came out quickly with his armor on, holding his jetpack. “Lets get some of their buire up. You two,” he pointed to Teryn, “Go get alor, and then you, verd’ika, you will stay put.” He took off for the family quarters. 

Teryn looked at Paz. “Should we get our alor, as well?” 

Paz growled. “I’ll inform her when I grab my jetpack.” He jerked his chin after Kewe. “Do what he said.” He took off at a run.

Atriu watched him leave, and then looked at Teryn. “He doesn’t like you.” 

“No.” After they woke up Rima (“Those fuckin’.... fucks”) they went to the med bay to wait and see if there were any injuries when the trainees were all brought back. Teryn figured there was about a 50/50 chance of that happening. Atriu was ordered to stay awake so Rima and Kewe could deal with her after they got back. 

“You were awake.” Atriu said after a while. 

“Hm?”

“When I found you. You were still awake.” Atriu had taken off her helmet, and shoved her hair out of her face. 

“Yes. I don’t… sleep much.” 

“That doesn’t seem good.” 

“I have nightmares.” 

“Oh.” Atriu managed to hold out for a whole 90 seconds. “Is it because of why you don’t have a helmet?”

Teryn looked at her, and then through her. “Not just that. There are a lot of things.” 

“...do you sleep better when my ba’vodu is here?” She squirmed a little bit when Teryn focused on her again. “I just… noticed that you seemed less… tense when he’s here.” 

Teryn smiled to herself but didn’t dignify that with an answer. “What were you doing out?”

Atriu gave a shamefaced smile. “The barracks kitchen doesn’t have good snacks.” 

“Ah.” That made sense. They didn’t say anything for a while. 

“Your al’verde doesn’t like you.” 

“I don't think many people do."

“Why not?” 

“They’re scared… not of me, _usually_ , but what I represent.” Teryn shrugged. “I’m sure many would be more comfortable if I went away. Like you would.”

Atriu dropped her eyes. “I don’t mean this like... it’s gonna sound, but why do you stay?” 

Teryn took a deep breath. “There’s a few reasons. It’s safer for everyone if I’m here and protected. There are people looking for me who would use me to hunt and kill everyone here.”

“Oh.”

“And I don’t belong anywhere else. Here, at least, I sort of belong.” She shrugged. “I belong here more than I do anywhere else.” 

Atriu considered that for a while. “Would it work? Using you?” 

“I’d like to think that my ori’vod wouldn’t be that stupid. But he would be. And we both know your ba’vodu definitely would be.” 

“Yeah, he would be.” 

Faris had just cleared a major crack and was turning to help one of the Samaki kids when he heard the roar of jet packs. He cringed- his buir’s jetpack had a distinctive sound, and he knew it pretty well. “Time’s up. They’re coming.”

The Navarro Foundlings all sat down to wait for the inevitable. The Samaki Herd all look at each other in alarm. “We could make a run-” one gestured down to the woods.

“No point. They see us.” Rima landed, followed by Kewe, and they were coldly furious.

“What were you all thinking?” Kewe snapped. Every kid started pointing fingers, and Kewe held up his hand. “Back to your quarters. All of you.” Everyone glumly trooped back, worried about what the punishment would be this time. 

Back at their quarters, Paz scowled down at Faris, who hung his head. “We’re supposed to know about these things.” 

“You never did before!”

“We _always_ did before.”

Faris gasped. “But... my vode always said you didn’t.” 

“We always did. Every time.” Paz sighed. “We assumed you wouldn’t be sneaking out here. At least not so soon.” 

Faris took off his helmet. “I miss them.” 

“I know. I miss them both, too.” Paz put a hand on Faris shoulder and squeezed. “This is the Way.”

Faris quietly repeated it, hands tracing the edges of his helmet. 

In the end, the punishment wasn’t as bad as it could have been. Extra physical training, and more rock climbing practice. No jetpack practice until further notice. And, since the jig was up on escape night for the Navarro foundings, all future planned expeditions needed to be cleared with the al’verde bajur of each Tribe. 

Over the next week, Atriu was released from her confinement to quarters, and quietly, slowly, would come by to see Tuathal when she knew Teryn was there. Atin started off being watchful and wary, but slowly started to relax, and the day he accepted a scratch around the ears was one of the high points of Atriu’s week. 

They still hadn’t talked about Arkil, but neither Teryn nor Tuathal was about to press the issue. She would get there in her own time, and she wasn’t blaming Teryn for everything. It was visible progress. 

The hunting had gone… okay. The payouts weren't the highest Din had ever seen, and there was something needling at the back of his mind that was making him more jumpy than usual. Cara was feeling it, too, when he’d mentioned it. 

“There’s rumors of street kids disappearing all over the sector. There’s always an ebb and flow with them, one way or another, but…” she shook her head. “Something is… I don’t know.” 

Din frowned down at Jha’iil, who was happily playing with the busy board Karga had given him. “I think I’m going to admit you’re right.” 

“Of course I was.” Cara smirked. “Taking him back?” 

He held up the puck he’d just gotten from her. “This guy was last seen on Naboo. It’s too populated. I’m not comfortable taking him there.” Din crouched down and stroked Jha’iil’s ear. “What do you say, womp rat? You want to go stay with your ba’vodu for a while?” 

“No. Stay with you.” 

Cara smiled. “You like your auntie T.” 

Jha’iil glowered at Cara as hard as he could. “Stay. With. Buir.” 

Din shook his head. “No, you can’t. We’re going to go back-” He paused. He was about to say _home_. “You’re going back to your ba’vodu.”

“NO.” Jha’iil flung himself to the ground and started to howl. At least, Din thought, he wasn’t using his powers to shove things around. 

“You should make it a quick drop off, this guy might be on the move.” Cara raised an eyebrow at the temper tantrum on the floor. “I’m gonna leave you to this. Let me know when you’re on your way back. Good luck!” 

Din shot her a glare and picked up the struggling Jha’iil. It was going to be a long flight. 

Teryn waited anxiously for the Razor Crest to the land. The message from Din had had a lot of howling Jha’iil in the background, so it was fairly short and terse- just that he was coming to drop the kid off, could she please handle him while he went back out? 

The answer of course was yes. 

It had been just over three weeks since Din and Jha’iil had left, and Teryn really wanted to talk to Din. She hadn’t told him about Rima’s offer before he left. Hopefully he’d stay the night and they could talk. 

It was hard, being alone without the two people she leaned on the most. _You should still be used to it, being alone._ But she wasn’t, not anymore. 

The Razor Crest came over the edge of the valley and settled down in the landing field. The Samaki Tribe had several ships which came and went with surprising regularity. Rima had told Teryn that she would know when Cuan was expected back, but at this point there was no news from either him or the salvage crew. 

She tried not to worry.

Once the Razor Crest powered down, Teryn went to go meet Din and Jha’iil, and was slightly dismayed to hear the angry howls coming from the hatch as it opened. Jha’iil was red and wrathful as Din shoved him into her arms. 

“He’s been like this since we left Navarro.” Din’s voice was tired. It wasn’t a short trip. 

Jha’iil’s howls devolved into a whimper, repeating, “Nayc, nayc, nayc,” as he reached for Din. 

“He wants to stay with me, but it’s not a good idea.” Din pressed some controls on his vambrace, and the busy board from Karga and Jha’iil’s other things came out on a small hovercart. “Let’s get this stuff to your quarters. I need to leave as soon as possible.”

Teryn blinked at the busy board. "The fuck is that."

Din rolled his eyes. "Karga."

Teryn sighed heavily. “You’re not staying the night?” 

“No, no time. I need to get to Naboo as soon as possible.” 

“Why don’t you-”

“He’ll be safer here, even if he’s mad about it.”

They walked quickly to Teryn and Cuan’s rooms. Teryn had already brought Jha’iil’s crib and set it up in the spare room, along with a few other things of his. “I had something I wanted-”

“Where’s…” Din looked around. 

“He had to leave right after you did. Orders.” 

Din grunted distractedly.

“You know how it is.” She took a deep breath, “I need to-”

“It needs to wait. I really have to go.” Din reached out to rub Jha’iil’s ear, and Jha’iil pulled away, refusing to even look at Din. “Ad’ika, ni ceta, but you’ll be safer here with your ba’vodu. I’ll be back as soon as I can.” He tried to take Jha’iil to touch foreheads, and Jha’iil pulled away, then _pushed_ firmly. Din staggered back a step and sighed. 

“Ori’vod-”

“Take care of him. I’ll let you know when I’m on my way back.” Din handed Teryn a bag of credits. “Give that to alor, and take him to the…. The old alor. He said he’d try to help him control his powers.”

“Ori’vod, please…” Teryn huffed in frustration and gave up. “At least send a message every day so he can see you’re okay.” 

Din hesitated, and nodded. “If I can.” He turned and left, and Teryn and Jha’iil stared at the door, then at each other. 

Jha’iil started to cry, and Teryn wiped her face quickly. Din hadn’t noticed the signet, which was such a _small_ thing to feel frustrated about, in the grand scheme of things, but… She took a deep breath. “Well, vod’ad, I guess it’s you and me.” 

Jha’iil hiccuped and buried his face in her neck. She patted him on the back. “Let's get you something to drink, and then maybe try for a nap.”

“Nayc.” 

“Elek.” She patted him again. “He’ll be back. I’m sure he wouldn’t do this if it wasn’t the best thing for both of you.” She sighed. “Nap for both of us, maybe.” 

Jha’iil was clingy and refused to go to the creche the next day. He grudgingly allowed Teryn to take him to the med bay while she did some work, and then somewhat willingly went to visit Tuathal. He was sullen and quiet, and Tuathal gave him a gentle smile. 

“Verd’ika, it’s okay to be angry.” Teryn gave him a narrow-eyed glance, and he chuckled. “Yes, that was aimed at both of you.”

Jha’iil sighed and shoved himself backwards into Teryn’s cuirass. 

“He’s barely said a word since his buir left.” 

“He’s angry and scared.” Tuathal said. 

“I don’t blame him.” 

Tuathal turned his face toward Teryn. “You weren’t able to speak with him at all?”

“No, he just shoved my vod’ad into my arms and left.” She looked down at the top of Jha’iil’s head. “I’m just… trying not to be anxious. About either of them.” 

“My bu’ad can take care of himself.” Tuathal laughed out loud when Teryn raised an eyebrow doubtfully at him. “I know it doesn’t seem like it all the time, but he’s generally quite capable. Which you know. Try not to worry.”

“He told me that when he left.” 

“Both of you. Try not to worry.” Tuathal patted Teryn’s hand. “They’ll both be home as soon as they can.” 

Back in her room for the night, Teryn tucked Jha’iil into his crib. “Where’s your datapad?” 

“Buir.” Jha’iil pulled his blanket over his face. 

“Your buir has it?”

Jha’iil nodded, and Teryn cocked her head. “Did you leave it there on purpose?” Jha’iil nodded again, and then peeped out from under the blanket. 

“Ke laarir? Gedet’ye?” _Sing? Please?_

“I suppose the real thing is better.” 

  
In the Razor Crest, once in hyperspace Din had pulled off his helmet and rubbed his face, as if he could rub off the guilt. It was the right decision. He was certain of it. But Jha’iil was so mad. 

And there was always that chance that something could go wrong. 

He glanced automatically at Jha’iil’s carrier, which had the toy control panel still attached to it, and noticed that the datapad Teryn had given him was sitting in it. Almost as if it had been placed there deliberately. He sighed again, this time letting out tension he'd been pretending he wasn't holding. His kid didn’t hate him. 

He picked it up, picked a song at random, closed his eyes, and leaned his head back to listen. 

Far away from the land you knew  
The dawn of day reaches out to you  
Though it feels like a fairy tale  
All of this is true

Run with me, have a look around  
We build our life of a sacred ground  
Come my love, our world's may part  
We'll be safe and sound

  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... things have slowed down a little due to being back at work and also writing this week was not easy. Please look at http://useofforceproject.org/ for information on policies police departments can put in place that reduce the police violence, and talk to your local and state governments about it. 
> 
> Mando'a Translations
> 
> shuner: bread  
> verd’ika: private  
> buire: parents  
> adiik: child  
> alor: chief  
> ba’vodu: parent's sibling  
> al’verde: commander  
> ori’vod: older sibling  
> vode: Siblings  
> al’verde bajur: training master (commander of education)  
> Buir: parent  
> nayc: no  
> ni ceta: I'm sorry (lit: I kneel)  
> vod’ad: Sibling's child  
> Elek: yes


	17. And it's not my fire, but was forged in flame

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I have tomorrow afternoon free. What do you say, vod’ad? Should we try swimming tomorrow?”
> 
> Jha’iil trilled curiously. He wasn’t sure what swimming really entailed, but the feelings he was getting from his ba’vodu were fun and cool and relaxing, and baths were nice, and rain was nice, so this swimming thing would probably be okay.

No one was particularly willing to own up to the idea. When all the co-conspirators are younger than five standard years (or developmentally the equivalent), it’s hard to get a straight answer to, “Who’s idea was it to throw ice cubes on the floor and play in the melting water?”

But when all responsible adults were called in to collect their soggy children, Jha’iil did seem remarkably smug to Teryn. 

He had, after a few days, become somewhat more cheerful. He was still clingy in the mornings, but would go to the creche. 

“Does he know how to swim?” 

“...I don’t know.” Teryn frowned. “I know he’s had baths, but I’m not sure about swimming.” 

“He should learn. Once it gets hot enough we like to take the pile of them swimming in the river.” The minder tilted their head and frowned. “Can his species swim?”

Teryn shrugged. It was about time to find out. While she was sure Din would prefer to be the one to introduce Jha’iil to swimming, he wasn’t there. So tough shit. 

The Samaki Tribe had enlarged a bend in the river into a large calm pool that had various levels. The water was chilly, but the shallow parts would warm up well enough in the hot months. 

“I have tomorrow afternoon free. What do you say, vod’ad? Should we try swimming tomorrow?”

Jha’iil trilled curiously. He wasn’t sure what swimming really entailed, but the feelings he was getting from his ba’vodu were fun and cool and relaxing, and baths were nice, and rain was often nice, so this swimming thing would probably be okay. He nodded, then perked up his ears. “K’aitome?” 

“Yes, we’ll get you some food.” 

  
Teryn had a training session with Paz before dinner. Things had been going as well as could be expected, and neither one had needed the med bay after a session yet, much to Ordo’s annoyance. He’d had credits riding on at least one having a broken bone within the first week. 

“Your reaction time is getting better.” Paz admitted, grudgingly. “You’ve been practicing on your own?”

Teryn nodded, dodged a punch, using the shield to shove him back. He grunted, and hooked a foot around her ankle and used his bulk to take her down to the ground. She tried to roll away, but he pinned the arm with the shield emitter down. She gritted her teeth and put the flamethrower in position, but he was too close to use it without endangering her. 

“Never let yourself get put into this position. You can’t do anything to me without risking burning your face off.” Paz sat back, and she pulled a leg back and landed a solid kick into the join of his shoulder. He swore as the bundle of nerves she hit spasmed, and let loose a vicious backhand towards her face. 

She raised the shield and was able to mostly deflect it, but he still managed to skip the back of his gauntlet along her cheek. She hissed at the pain, and he backed up quickly.

“Shit.” 

“It’s fine.” She touched her cheek and looked down at the blood on her fingers. “It’s fine.” 

“It’s not, you’re bleeding…” He grabbed a cloth, and tried to press it to the wound, and she suddenly skittered back to the wall. “...what… fuck.”

“Go away.”

“Just let me…”

“GO. AWAY.” Her face had gone white around the swelling gash, and she was clearly trying to control her breathing before it got out of hand. Paz backed up a step, then another, and left, trying to think of who he could get to help.

Teryn gritted her teeth and clenched her fists. This was stupid. And weak. And stupid. 

In the end, Paz sent H’lava, who clucked in sympathy. “Why is it that fighting with the al’verde always gets your face messed up?” 

“It was an accident.” Teryn muttered. 

“Hmmmm. Do we need to go to the med bay, or can you deal with this in your quarters?” 

Jha’iil was with Tuathal and Atriu, and the plan was to have dinner over there, so they went to Teryn and Cuan’s quarters. Teryn managed to get the cut treated without flying off the handle at H’lava, who just wanted to help, but it was close. There was a knock at the door, and H’lava found Paz waiting awkwardly. 

“Is she okay?”

H’lava shrugged and let him in. Teryn glared over the cold compress she was holding to her cheek. 

“I’m sorry, that was an accident.” He gestured. "You don't have bacta for that?"

"Don't want to waste it. I know it was an accident. It’s fine.” 

Paz nodded a dismissal at H’lava, who looked at Teryn to see if it was okay. Teryn paused just long enough to annoy Paz before agreeing. H’lava smirked beneath her helmet, and Teryn twitched a half-smile at her. H’lava nodded, and gave Paz a long look before she left. Paz grumbled. “What are you going to do?”

“What do you mean?”

“Eventually, we’re going to get Gideon. You won’t have to stay.” Paz paced around the room. “What are you going to do when you can leave without putting all of us in danger?”

“I don’t know.” 

“It can’t be easy, being around us.” He looked at some of the things on a shelf- haphazard stacks of datapads and books, carved animals, and interesting rocks. 

“It isn’t.” She narrowed her eyes. "Isn't easy for you, either, I bet."

“I don’t know if I would. Being reminded of everything I couldn’t have.”

Teryn sat back. “Who’s fault is that?”

He grumbled. “This is the Way and you know it.” 

“The Way is bullshit, and you know it.” 

“The Way is the only thing that makes sense.” He snapped.

“The Way -your Way- would still have me out in the cold.”

“There is only one Way.” 

“They asked me if I wanted to take the Creed again.” The words fell out before she could stop them. Of all the people to talk to about this, Paz fucking Vizsla was not even on the list, much less first among the Navarro Tribe.

He froze. “They what.” 

“I haven’t decided.” 

“You can’t. It doesn’t work like that.” 

“If I did, I wouldn’t have to listen to your zealot mouth anymore.” 

With effort, he managed to ignore that. “What did alor say?”

“I haven’t told her.” She shrugged. “I haven’t told… anyone, really.” 

“Ah.” 

“I haven’t decided.” She repeated. “But I do get to decide.” 

“This isn’t the Way. This isn’t how we…” he stopped, frustrated, and stalked out. She scowled after him. 

“Chakaar.” 

She probably should talk to the Armorer, though. 

  
Jha’iil had been spending part of each day with Tuathal. There was a limit to the amount of control one could expect to teach such a young child, but Tuathal would tell him stories, and slowly figured out how to project images into Jha’iil’s mind so he could see. Little by little, Jha’iil figured out how to project back more than just general feelings, though everyone encouraged him to use words as much as possible. 

Tuathal would also play the ball game with him, throwing a ball, and then Jha’iil would catch it and send it back. It took practice to get the fine control, but they worked on it. Jha’iil was thrilled by the attention, and thrived. When Teryn came to collect him for dinner, he would tell her everything they’d worked on, nudging at the corners of her mind that could just feel him pushing. 

The evening after the disastrous practice session with Paz, Tuathal could tell something was off before she even knocked. “Ad’ika?” 

Jha’iil gasped when the door opened and saw the cut and swelling on his ba’vodu’s face. Yet again, here was proof that his people could not be trusted on their own. He held up a hand, and chirped questioningly. He knew that his buir and his ba’vodu didn’t want him using his powers to heal, and the Old One agreed with them. But he had to ask. 

“No, no.” she shook her head. “I’m fine.” 

Jha’iil looked at her dubiously, and projected doubt at Tuathal. Tuathal sighed, but didn’t push. 

  
The next afternoon was warm, and Teryn and Jha’iil were the only ones at the swimming hole. Atin followed them, because of course he wasn’t going to let Jha’iil out of his sight in a new situation, even if Teryn was there. Jha’iil looked at the swimming hole dubiously, then looked more dubious as Teryn stripped down to leggings and a breast band. “Lets get your tunic off. Thank the stars your buir finally got you more clothes.” Jha’iil trilled worriedly and clung to her braid as she stepped into the water. “You like baths. This is just a big bath.” 

She sat down in the water and set him down- it was only just above her ankles, and not even up to his waist. He squealed. “Cold!” 

“It’s a little chilly. Give it a minute.” 

He looked dubiously, then bent down to pat the water. He considered the splashes he made for a minute, and then gave her a side-eyed look she knew meant trouble. She was not in the least surprised when he directed a splash at her. He grinned, and she grinned back. “Should we try deeper? I’ll hold on to you.” 

Atin settled watchfully on a rock. He did not swim, but he’d play lifeguard. What he was expected to do if there was actual trouble was still unclear.

Jha’iil patted the water again, and nodded. She picked him up and walked out deeper, and held him in the water. He gasped again, and kicked. She moved him around so it felt like he was swimming and he giggled. 

“Can you float? Let’s find out.” She carefully let go, but kept her hands close, and he sank a little, and started flailing. “Okay, okay.” She took hold again, and he scrambled up to her shoulder, chittering. “You stay up there, hold on, and I’ll go out deeper, okay? I won’t let anything happen. Okay?”

She couldn’t see his face from that angle, but she could feel him thinking, and then he took a firm grip on her hair and sat down on her shoulder. “Okay.” 

She went out deeper, testing the current, and once she was sure it wasn’t going to be too strong, pulled her feet up to tread water. Jha’iil squealed and pulled, looking around wildly, and then, once he realized they were just bobbing around, began to giggle. 

After they did that for a while, bobbing around, Teryn put her feet down and stood up. Jha’iil blew a raspberry. “Not done.” 

“No?”

“No.” 

“Okay.” Teryn patted the water in front of her. “Jump!” Jha’iil hesitated for only a fraction of a second before jumping in, and she caught him before he got too far under water, and then lay back , floating with Jha’iil balanced on her front. He grinned. She grinned back. “Is this fun?”

“Yeah!” He rolled over onto his back, looking up at the sky. “Buir?” 

“He’ll be back. After we’re done here, we can go see if he’s sent a message, okay?”

“Okay.” He kicked his feet, splashing, and they lazed along until Jha’iil started to whine about the cold. The water was still chilly, and he was still very small. They went back to where Teryn had laid out towels in the sun so they’d be warm, and she wrapped him up in one. He snuggled down, blinking contentedly, and she let the sun beat down and dry her own clothes. Atin curled up next to them, purring. 

As afternoons went, it wasn’t bad. 

They went to Rima’s office to see if there had been any messages sent. Rima raised an eyebrow at the bruises erupting over Teryn’s cheek, but said nothing. 

Din had sent a message- a short one, but it was a holomessage. “Ad’ika, I’m okay. I’ll be a bit longer than expected, but be good for your ba’vodu.” And then a pause, and a gruff, “Ner kar’tylir darasuum, ad’ika.” 

Rima raised an eyebrow, and Teryn shrugged. “For him, that’s pretty warm.” 

Jha’ill made Rima play it several times before he was satisfied, then curled into Teryn’s neck. He was tired. It had been a busy day. Teryn patted him reassuringly on the back. 

“I got a message from the salvage crew, as well.” Teryn stiffened and tried not to look too hopeful. “Their ship will be back tonight, Cuan will be delayed a bit. But soon.” 

Teryn nodded, slightly crestfallen. Rima smiled. “Don’t worry. He’s fine. Just some details.” 

“He must have found something he can fly back.” 

Rima nodded. “Did Lathom tell you what they decided to name the baby?” 

“No?”

“Well, they wanted to know your name, but…” Rima paused to see if Teryn would finally volunteer it. Teryn gave a slight smile. It was a game now. “But I told them what Cuan calls you. They named the baby Senaaru.” 

_Bird._ “Oh.” Teryn looked down at her feet, touched and embarrassed.

Rima thumped Teryn on the shoulder. “I thought you’d like that.” She jerked her chin at the Forge. “I think Sadet has something for you, too.” 

Teryn felt her face go white. “I…” Rima cocked her head, and Teryn shook her head. “I’m not…” Jha’iil cooed, worriedly. 

“Come with me.” Rima led Teryn into the Forge, and then held her hands out Jha’iil. After a long look, and then checking with Teryn that it was okay, Jha’iil allowed her to take him. Sadet walked over, and circled around Teryn, muttering to himself. 

“Never had to deal with hair like that before. Mmmmmphmmm.” He picked up the braids and experimentally wound them together. “It should work.” 

Teryn looked at Rima with exasperation and Rima nodded, trying to be reassuring. Sadet came back with something cloth and heavy in his hands. “Not a helmet. Should help, though.” 

It was a hood, but one that had a layer of mail in between the inner and outer layer, and it was designed with space in the back that her braids could be tucked into. “Is this…”

“The mail is made from beskar. It won’t protect like a helmet, but it’s better than nothing.” He shrugged. “Thought you could use something, at least.”

“I…” Teryn looked down at it. “I don’t know if I can accept this.” Her chest started to feel tight. The thought of anything on her head was just… a lot. And the amount of work that Sadet must have put into making the mail…

“Al’baar’ur.” Rima took Teryn’s arm and said it firmly, with an air of command. “We, my Armorer and I, are the leaders of this Tribe. We decided, together, that this was an appropriate thing to offer. It won’t necessarily protect against that-” Rima gestured at Teryn’s bruised face, and pretended not to notice Teryn’s flinch back, “-and it’s not a helmet. Accepting this has nothing to do with taking the Creed again. If -when- we go after Gideon, you have earned the right to be in that fight, and you should be prepared.” 

Teryn had retreated into herself, but managed to nod a thank you, scoop up Jha’iil and the hood, and walk back to her quarters- her empty quarters- before throwing the hood into one corner, sinking into another, and shaking, trying not to cry. 

Jha’iil cuddled under her chin and hummed, and it took several minutes before she realized that he was humming one of the songs she’d recorded for him, trying to calm her just like she would calm him. 

“Oh, vod’ad, you shouldn’t have to do this.” she whispered. “I’m sorry.” 

Jha’iil hummed more as she rocked him, before falling asleep. She sat in the corner, unwilling to move until there was a knock at the door. “Ad’ika?”

There was only one person in the Covert who would call her that. She stood up, careful not to wake Jha’iil, and let Tuathal in. 

“What’s wrong, ad’ika?” He touched her hand. “I could tell something wasn’t right, and you’re very unsettled.” 

“I….” she gestured helplessly. “There’s just so much.”

“Start small.” He nudged her into the room. “Put the verd’ika in his room and start small.”

She nodded, and settled Jha’iil into his crib, making sure that he had his mythosaur stuffie and was well tucked in. After taking a few steadying breaths, she went back out into the main room where Tuathal had settled into a chair and Atin was on his lap. 

“Begin at the beginning, ad’ika.” 

“She wanted to name her baby after me. And your armorer made me something to protect my head and I don’t know… I accidentally told our al’verde about taking the Creed again and he said I can’t and they won’t… if they don’t recognize it- what if…” she started to breathe sharply and shallowly. “What if my ori’vod wouldn’t… what if he thinks it’s not...” 

“You haven’t been able to talk to him yet.” 

She shook her head. “No.”

“Not even about the dream you had?” 

“He just handed me my vod’ad and left.” Teryn put her face in her hands. “I don’t know what to do.” 

“You don’t have to decide now. You should wait and talk with him. Your al’verde, I have noticed, is… somewhat rigid? I don’t believe your ori’vod is the same.” He smiled kindly. “He did come back for you.” 

“Eventually.” It was hard to keep the faint bitterness out of her tone.

“But he did. I also suspect that you are being truly appreciated for the first time in a long time, and you don’t trust it.” 

She looked at him warily, and he smiled. “I think you’ll get used to it. You’ll have to.” She made a doubtful sound. He chuckled. “You will.” He gave her hand a squeeze. “He’ll be home soon.” He wasn’t talking about Din anymore.

  
Late that night, the salvage ship returned. Teryn watched them land, but didn’t go over. He wasn’t with them, what was the point? But not long after they landed, a rather short woman in armor, still with her helmet on, came over to where Teryn and Atin were sitting outside, as was their habit.

“He said you’d still be awake.” 

Teryn raised an eyebrow. Atin was indifferent. 

The woman removed her helmet to reveal shockingly pink hair, sweated down. “Wouldn’t shut the fuck up. Anyway, he said to tell you that everything is fine, he should be back tomorrow, and to give you this.” She handed Teryn a small carved wooden bird, wings extended, and beak open in song. 

Teryn ran her fingers over it. “He found this?”

“He made it.” The woman snorted in disgust. “Got shavings all over my fucking ship.” She looked Teryn up and down. 

“Thank you? I’m sorry?”

“Not your fault. The shu’shuk was mooning the entire fucking trip. At least he had something to keep his hands busy.” The woman smiled. “And thank you for the music. It was fun to see what the new song would be every day.”

“I’m glad the program actually worked.” Teryn smiled a bit, and the woman grinned back. “Was there anything left of the ship?”

“Not much. Had to find a new one, that’s what took so long.” The woman sighed, running her hand through her hair. “It’s a piece of shit, but it’ll do, eventually.” 

Teryn held up the bird. “Thank you, seriously.” 

“Ba’gedet’ye.” The woman waved her hand and left. Teryn smiled down at the bird. Tomorrow. She could wait until tomorrow. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mando'a Translations 
> 
> vod’ad: Sibling's Child  
> K’aitome: Food  
> al’verde: Commander  
> alor: Chief  
> Chakaar: corpse robber, thief, petty criminal - general term of abuse  
> br />  
> ba’vodu: parent's sibling  
> Ad’ika: little one  
> Buir: Parent  
> Ner kar’tylir darasuum: I love you  
> Al’baar’ur: Doctor  
> vod’ad: Sibling's child  
> verd’ika: private (rank) Can be used affectionately, often to a child; *little soldier* - context is critical.  
> ori’vod: Older brother  
> shu’shuk: Disaster  
> Ba’gedet’ye: You're welcome! (Like the German use of bitte.)


	18. A cat is not a dog.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A day in the life of Atin the lothcat. A short interlude of some Very Important Cat Business. 
> 
> Atin's names for the people who are relevant to him: Teryn: The Lady. Din The Shiny Questionable. Jha'iil: The Kit. Cuan: Tolerable. Tuathal: The Old One.

Atin woke up and stretched. The Lady was not yet awake, but it was daylight, so he felt comfortable leaving her alone while he checked on the Kit. He did not like leaving her alone in the dark, and the Tolerable man was away. So Atin would protect her in the dark. 

The Lady had been his Person since he was a tiny kitten, but when the Shiny Questionable had brought the small green kitten, he had found that his responsibilities were now split. The Kit was small, but needed a great deal of protection and watching, especially now that they were in a place with open spaces. 

Atin’s morning routine was fairly simple while the Tolerable was away and Kit was there. Wake up, check to make the Lady was okay. Check on the Kit. If the Kit was awake, they would play, which had the advantage of keeping the Kit out of trouble. Wait until the Kit and the Lady were both awake, and then demand his breakfast.

When he was a little kitten, Atin would wake up the Lady demanding breakfast along with his siblings before dawn, but that was mostly Chakaar and Shabuir’s doing. They had no manners. 

Atin had manners. The Lady never slept too long, usually, and breakfast would come as soon as she was awake, and if for some reason, she didn’t wake up, there was always something to hunt.

And she’d feel guilty enough to provide extra breakfast. So everyone was a winner. 

After breakfast for everyone (The Kit needed different food than the Lady and it seemed ridiculous, but Atin had also learned that the Lady needed something called caff or the nice smelling hot water in order to face the day unless they were all woken up by a lot of yelling, then she would run out the door without it) (and then be grumpy for the rest of the day), they would usually all troop down to the room with the whole pile of kittens. Atin would check to make sure that his Kit was alright before going off on his very important Cat Business. 

His very important Cat Business involved a morning nap in the sun, then perhaps some hunting around the storerooms- vermin existed on every planet. At lunchtime he would check on the Kit, who would almost always share some food, much to the dismay of the big people, then in the afternoon he might nap more, or go see the Old One, or, if it was chilly, curl up in a corner in the Forge. Fire was particularly fascinating. The Lady didn’t need him during the day, usually, but while the Tolerable and the Shiny Questionable were gone, he would check in on her, as well. 

After dinner, he would stay with his people- either the Kit or the Lady. At night, once the Kit was tucked into bed, that was the time he loved best, because the Lady would sit and he would sit on her lap or on her shoulders, and they would just be, like they always had been. 

On this particular morning, he went to his favorite morning napping spot. The nice thing about this place was that there were outside places to nap in the sun, and a cat, any kind of cat, needs the sun in order to function. The weeks on the ship with only occasional, stolen moments in the sun, and the months in the underground place were difficult, but he put up with them, because his People needed him. The Lady needed him, and the Kit needed him, and the Shiny Questionable also probably needed him, and he could not let them leave him behind. So he hadn’t. It had all worked out, though. They were in a place with trees and sun and….

….and….

FISH. 

Once his morning nap was over, it was time for a mid-morning snack. When he had been a tiny kitten, he would cry to the Lady about needing a snack, and she would always say no, and something about “it’s not dinnertime yet.” 

Of course it wasn’t dinnertime. He knew that. That was not the point. He wanted a snack. 

Sometimes he could go to the kitchens and someone would take pity on him- after all, he would tell them how he was starving and how no one fed him, ever, but this morning, he had other plans.

This morning, he was finally going to get one of the fishes that taunted him from the edge of the river. 

Parts of the river were deep and fast, but other parts were shallow and lazy, and the fish would rest in those parts. Atin had been watching them for several weeks, occasionally trying to snatch one out, but not trying particularly hard. 

Today would be his day. He was not named Stubborn for nothing. 

He crouched at the edge of the river, tail twitching as he watched and waited for a fish. Some of the fish were very large. He’d tried for one of the very big fish before, when they first had arrived, and fallen into the river. He’d managed to climb out, and ran to the Lady, crying and wet. She’d wrapped him up in a towel and put him by the heater and gotten him some very nice bits of food. 

But he’d learned. The big fish were too big. He’d wait until a smaller one came near the bank. He crouched, motionless, except for the faint twitching of the tip of his tail. Occasionally a fish would come near, and he’d twitch, and the fish would swim away. 

Eventually, after the sun had moved, a fish came to rest near the bank, and with extreme effort, he held still. The fish held still, resting, and finally, Atin made his move. 

He darted one claw down and snagged the fish, and when it writhed he snapped at it with his jaws and flung himself away from the bank, with the fish. 

It was a much bigger fish than it had looked like from the bank, and he shook his head sharply to make it stop thrashing. His ears picked up something in the trees coming towards him, and he wasn’t sure what it was. It was time to bring his kill home- after all, he did not need all of this fish, and the Lady and the Kit needed to eat, too. 

He trotted back home, head and tail held high, holding the fish that was longer than he was. As he passed other people- not his people, so they were irrelevant- they made admiring sounds, as was right and proper. 

This was his due. 

The Lady was speechless for several minutes when he dropped the fish at her feet, before skirtiching his head and saying the “good kitty” sounds that he loved so much. 

They were best sounds besides the melodic meowing she would do. He loved those the most. 

She took the fish, and he watched anxiously while she took out the bits in the middle- the best bits, in his opinion, and when it seemed like she was going to throw them away he yowled angrily. Those were his. By right. 

She sighed, a lot like the Shiny Questionable did, but gave most of them to him, keeping some others. She also gave him the head- another very good bit- and some of the meat. The rest she put in the small cold box. “For later.” 

Atin was extremely pleased with himself. The Lady and the Kit would eat, and he proved mastery over the fish. Now he would go do his rounds, and check on his other People, and then nap the nap of the just in the Forge. 


	19. Ain't it a gentle sound, the rollin' in the graves?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Faris was about to say something else when a ship puttered over into the valley, old, loud, and leaking something, possibly several things. He frowned. “Is that him?”
> 
> “I think so…? I almost hope not, because…”
> 
> Faris finished her thought. “That ship is a piece of shit.”

Din sighed as he shoved the bounty into the carbonite freezer. It hadn’t been a difficult job, but the sheer amount of people around Naboo had been a lot. There were plenty of New Republic peacekeepers around, but he strongly suspected that there were a number of Imperial sympathizers lurking around as well. This had been the homeworld of the Emperor, after all. He didn’t regret the choice to bring Jha’iil back to the Covert, no matter how angry the kid had been about it. 

He’d asked around a bit, and while no one had noticed children missing from Naboo, people who had travelled to and from Outer Rim worlds had all heard things. No one seemed to know anything specific, everyone had just heard something or noticed that there were fewer street kids running around. 

More than one person had shrugged and thought it was a good sign. Surely fewer street kids was a good thing, right? Someone must have finally _done_ something about the problem. 

Din chewed on those thoughts on the long, quiet trip back to Navarro. 

And it was so quiet. He hadn’t quite realized how used he’d gotten to talking to Jha’iil, or listening to Jha’iil chatter away until he wasn’t there anymore. How had he managed in the long years before he had found the kid? He was surprised he hadn’t gone insane. 

Sending messages home (and he was still a bit perplexed at how easy it was to think of Samaki as “home” now) was just painfully awkward. Normally he’d just talk to Jha’iil, but he’d never been comfortable with holomessages to begin with, and since there was always a concern about the message being intercepted, he felt tongue-tied by them. 

He missed his kid. 

After considering it from all angles, he finally decided that he’d take a few more pucks. Quick jobs. Get as many credits as possible and then take some extended time in the Covert. Jha’iil needed stability and safety, and he needed his buir. Din nodded to himself. That’s what he would do. It was a plan. 

  
Teryn hadn’t expected to sleep well that night, whether from nerves, or emotional turmoil, or the pain in her face that she stubbornly refused to do anything about. She woke up before dawn, and went to walk along the river. 

Atin, smart boy that he was, decided that it was too early for any sort of activity. Jha’iil was still sound asleep, and would likely remain that way for a while longer, so she could take some time to collect herself. 

After her walk, she found a pleasant, smiling, happy boy waiting for his breakfast while playing with Atin, and took him to get food and deposit him in the creche. Things had been going well there- he hadn’t brought any breakable toys, and the “lessons” with Tuathal were clearly helping him control his powers. Most emotional outbursts involved being sad about missing Din, or one memorable fight where he’d just refused pants altogether. 

Teryn had, after considering it for a few minutes, shrugged and let him go pantless. 

She started fussing in the med bay, but Roccan put his foot down when she started making noises about reorganizing the entire thing, and Tabor, the traitor, backed him up. In disgust, she went to the gardens. The short scrapper wasn’t sure when Cuan was expected in, so it was just a waiting game at this point. In the garden, it was peaceful and things were growing. It was a good place to expend nervous energy. 

She was honestly surprised when Faris cautiously walked into the gardens, holding his helmet. She smiled at him, but went back to her weeding. He slowly, with exaggerated casualness, made his way over. After pretending to examine a flower, he took a deep breath. “Can I ask you something?”

“Of course.”

“It’s about… helmets.” 

“Ah.” She gestured over to a spot in the shade. “Should we sit?”

He nodded, and frowned, thinking about where he wanted to start. “I know... we all know what happened to you.” She nodded. “And that means that you’re… not part of us anymore.”

“That’s what our Tribe believes, yes.” 

“But the other Tribe doesn’t keep their helmets on all the time.” He frowned. “But they are still Mando’ade.” 

“Yes.”

“How does that work?” He tumbled on before she could begin to answer. “I know what my Buir would say, that this is the Way and they don’t follow it, but the visitor, your…” He left a pause that made it clear who and what he meant- “He wore his helmet when he was with us. And then took it off when he got home.”

“Yes.” Teryn didn’t think it was appropriate to mention the times Cuan had removed his helmet with her while they were still on Jelucan. Those moments had been private, almost stolen, and belonged just to them. 

“So….” Faris paused helplessly. 

Teryn took a breath to collect herself. “We all follow the Resol’nare, right?” Faris nodded. “And the Resol’nare doesn’t say anything about helmets. It talks about armor. We, our Tribe, believe that means we wear all of our armor all the time. The other Tribe wears most of it all the time, or at least some of it.” 

Faris nodded again. “But we all still follow it.”

“Someone very smart told me that ‘There are many Ways, but they all go the same direction.’” 

“Oh.” Faris thought about that for a minute. “I’m supposed to swear the Creed soon.” 

“I know.” Teryn cocked her head. “Do you want to?”

“Yes.” Faris said immediately. “But I don’t know if I want to wear my helmet all the time.” 

“You have a choice. Before, you had two choices- take the Creed, or not. Now, maybe, there is another one.” 

“What would you do?”

Teryn sighed. “I don’t know.” 

“Do you… regret taking the Creed? After everything that happened?” 

“That’s a complicated question. I think… I think the answer is no. It brought me here. But I know a lot more than I did at 14.”

“I don’t know if I want to never see my buir’s face again.” 

Teryn smiled sympathetically. “It’s not easy. Faith is never easy, and walking the way of the Mandalore is hard. It’s a choice you have to keep making over and over.”

“Unless someone chooses for you.” He said quietly, hesitantly.

Teryn nodded. “Unless someone chooses for you. And even then you can keep walking, even if no one else sees it.” 

“Is that what you did?” 

Teryn looked down at her hands. “Without even realizing that’s what I was doing, yes. I did.” 

Faris was about to say something else when a ship puttered over into the valley, old, loud, and leaking something, possibly several things. He frowned. “Is that him?”

“I think so…? I almost hope not, because…”

Faris finished her thought. “That ship is a piece of shit.” 

  
She slowly went towards where the ship was landing- or trying to, but one of the landing struts wouldn’t descend. The short scrapper was watching, nose wrinkled in disgust. “At least it made it here.”

Teryn glanced over, not concealing her alarm. “Was there a chance it wouldn’t?”

The scrapper glanced at her quickly, then back at the ship. “Nah.” Teryn raised both eyebrows, then back at the ship that finally got the landing gear all down and landed hard. The ship was landing near the hanger building- clearly it needed work. A lot of work.

After an interminable wait, the hatch opened, and Teryn felt unaccountably anxious. There was nothing to be anxious about, no reason to… another Mandalorian she didn’t recognize exited, and then out came Cuan, in his red armor, still wearing his helmet. 

She let out a breath, and he looked up and saw her, and for a moment, they held each other’s gaze, the entire universe focused on the other. She swallowed as he came towards her- there was nothing quite as affecting as a Mandalorian in full armor, especially one as well-formed as Cuan Tadasco. 

He pressed the forehead of his helmet to the top of Teryn’s head, both hands on either side of her head. She grasped his wrists and murmured, “Su cuy’gar.” 

“Cyare.” The short scrapper made a noise, and he raised his head to spare her a glance. “Kata. I told you we’d get it here.” 

“Mmmhmmm.” She twitched an eyebrow. “Let’s see how well it held together.” 

“Little bailing wire, some tape, it’s fine.” He laughed as Kata stalked towards the ship, and turned his full attention back to Teryn, and she could tell behind his visor that his eyes were roaming her face, and he growled. “What happened?” He didn’t gesture at the bruises, but that’s what he meant.

“Training. It’s fine”

He cocked his head doubtfully. He’d heard that phrase before. “Did you sleep while I was gone?”

“Not much,” she admitted.

He sighed. He wasn’t surprised. “I need to check in with Rima, but…” His hand tightened around the back of her neck with meaning.

She grinned. “I’ll be waiting.” 

  
Armor was flung all over their quarters, and they were exhaustedly snuggled in the bed. 

“Did I miss anything?” he asked, fingers idly playing with her hair. 

“A lot.” She was tracing the lothwolf tattoo in his chest. “The baby was born- a healthy girl, but it was a good thing I stayed. The older Foundlings snuck out one night to run the rockfall. Atin caught a fish in the river, and has extremely pleased with himself ever since. I’ve been learning how to use my shield emitter.”

“Is that how that happened?” He asked, nodding at her face.

“Mmmhmm. Um. Your vod’ad got extremely drunk and called me a whore a couple of times, but she seems to be coming around.” 

“She did what?”

“Oh yeah. It was fun.” She chuckled. “It’s kind of funny now, but she is still grieving her buir.” 

“Does she still blame you?”

“I don’t think so.” She sat up suddenly. “Oh, shit, speaking of vod’ade, I have to go pick mine up from the creche.” 

“He’s here?”

She tossed a look over her shoulder. “My ori’vod dropped him off several days ago. I don’t really know why, he was only here for about ten minutes.” He sat up and watched as she got dressed, a smile on his face. “What are you looking at?”

“You.”

She blushed, and he laughed. 

Once she was ready to go get Jha’iil, she went over and ran her fingers through his hair. “You should go see your ba'buir. Then you can tell me why you got that absolute piece of crap ship.” 

“Oh, that’s easy, cyar’ika. It was cheap, and will take a long, long, long time to get it repaired enough for what we need it to do. Months, probably.”

“Oh.” She smiled. “Was this a plot between you and…”

“Kata? Oh, yes. She’s a cheerful co-conspirator. Just had to promise that I’d let her do whatever she wanted to it.” 

“Months?” That sounded good. 

He grinned, then growled, and kissed her palm. “Yup. Months.” 

  
At the creche, Jha’iil was not ready to stop playing. “Vod’ad, guess who’s home?” 

She realized her mistake when his ears went up and he looked so hopeful and happy. “BUIR?” 

Shit. “No, I’m sorry, no. No, it’s Kurs’khaded.” She looked guiltily at the minders, and they shrugged in sympathy. 

Jha’iil looked at her reproachfully and his eyes filled with tears. Yes, he liked Cuan. He liked Cuan very much. But Cuan was not his buir. 

“Your buir will come find you right away when he gets back. We can go check for a message.” 

He allowed her to pick him up and he sighed, sad. “Kursh?” 

“Yup. Kurs.” She walked him to Rima’s office, where there wasn’t a message, much to everyone’s disappointment, and then back to their quarters, Jha’iil cuddled into her shoulder, sniffling. 

Cuan had tidied up the wreckage from earlier and gave Jha’iil a big smile. “Verd’ika!” He gave Jha’iil’s ear a rub. 

“Su coo!” Jha’iil gave him a brave smile. It wasn’t Cuan’s fault that he wasn’t Din, and he made his ba’vodu happy, so Jha’iil would make the effort for him. “Me’vaar ti gar, Kursh?” He looked at Teryn for approval. She nodded. They’d been working on that one. 

“Naas.” Cuan smiled, and then quirked an eyebrow at Teryn. “Kursh?” 

“Kurs’khaded is a bit of a mouthful for him.” 

Cuan grinned. “I suppose it is.” 

  
After dinner with Tuathal and Atriu, and after they got Jha’iil settled for the night, Teryn and Cuan sat outside where they could hear if Jha’iil woke up. They were just cuddled together, and he held up the beskar mail hood. “Found this in the corner.”

“Mmm. Your armorer made it for me.” 

He waited to see if she’d say anything else, and when she didn’t, he went on. “I noticed you wear the mudhorn signet now.” 

“I, uh.. I had a dream. About my buir. We talked about… well, several things. You, and…” she looked down and whispered, “About Rima’s offer. And everything.” 

He nodded, keeping one hand touching the back of her neck. It had always seemed to help ground her when she needed it.

“She said she wasn’t ashamed of me.” Teryn's voice wobbled as she took a shaky breath. “And that I would see her again, which means maybe…”

“Maybe you’re not severed from the Manda?”

“Maybe? I don’t know. But she said I could choose, if I wanted to.” She shook her head. “I didn’t think it was really an option, before, so…”

“Do you want to?” he asked, gently. 

“I don’t know.” She touched the hood. “The thought of putting anything on my head at all terrifies me so much… I know that makes me a coward, but…” 

“No, cyar'ika, ner cyare. No. It’s trauma, and those don’t just go away.” He nuzzled the side of her head. “You’re not a coward. You’re one of the bravest people I’ve ever met.” 

She sighed at that, but didn’t argue with him, for once. “I wish.. A lot of things.” She yawned and snuggled into his shoulder, eyes starting to droop. “I’m glad you’re home.” 

He kissed the top of her head. He’d noticed the use of the word home, and it made his heart content. “I’m glad I’m home too.” He paused just long enough to let her slip slightly more towards sleep. “Who were you training with?”

“The al’verde.” she mumbled. 

“Yours?” 

“Mmmhmmm.” her head slumped down, and he tightened a fist. There was a conversation he was looking forward to. 

  
Din sighed to himself, then sighed again as he saw his quarry go into a tavern. He’d hoped this would be a quick job, but the tavern was busy and boisterous, and had several exits. Even with a tracking fob, he could lose his prey in the warren of alleys and narrow streets.

This one wasn’t a garden variety bail jumper- he was a highly placed operative of an organization that was attempting to challenge Black Sun. Din wasn’t entirely sure who had placed the bounty- the New Republic or Black Sun (given the amount of money involved, he admitted to himself, it was probably Black Sun), but based on the puck, this man had his fingers in several unsavory pots. 

There was always someone to step into the power vacuum left by the absence of functional government. And there was always someone willing to pay to remove them. Din was willing to take the pay to feed his people. 

It was a fucking holiday of some damn kind, there are people everywhere. For many bounty hunters, this would be a blessing. For Din, it was just more people to notice him. 

He pulled back into the shadows and used his HUD to get a sense of the layout of the tavern. It wasn’t just a tavern it was a fucking warren of multiple rooms and hallways and crowded with people. Time to take a different approach. Time to become simply inevitable. 

He tucked the fob in his hand so it wasn’t visible, but he could follow the beeps, squared his shoulders, and strode into the tavern like he owned the fucking place. The crowd silenced and parted around him as he, without slowing, followed the fob signal through a door, taking measure steps. Never speeding, never slowing.

Murmurs sprung up around him, people pulling out commlinks. The clock started ticking as soon as he’d entered. The sight of him would cause some people to decide they wanted to take a chance against a Mandalorian, if just for the bragging rights. 

He kept walking. Stalking. He found his prey in one of the back rooms, far from an exit, but the wall faced an alley. Handy. He was lounged on top of twi’lek dancer, who used her makeup to make her appear more interested in the goings-on than she really was. 

The bounty looked up, and went a bit pale around the edges, but tried to bluff it out. “What do you want?” 

Din put the puck down and activated it. The twi’lek shook her head, muttered, “nope” and clambered out of the booth and vanished into the crowd. 

“You think you can take me in, just like that?” 

Din smirked. This was where the fun always started. “I can bring you in warm, or I can bring you in cold.” It was going to be cold. He didn’t want to listen to this three-credit gangster whine all the way back to Navarro. 

“Or, I can make you… be… cold.” The bounty said, and he realized in the middle of the sentence that he had nothing witty to say. Din rolled his eyes and put a hand on his blaster. 

The attack from behind was hardly a surprise- the bounty had flicked his eyes to something behind Din and Din was already moving to dodge the blow. The bounty tried to scramble away, but Din caught him with his grappling line while pulling his blaster to deal with the threat behind.

Rather, threats. 

Four bodyguards stood behind him, and Din sighed to himself. This was going to get messy no matter what. He hated to waste whistling birds on these losers, but every alternative he could come up with involved a lot of casualties. 

Well, he’d be going home soon. He could ask for more. And tell Cara that he needed a higher fee. 

He activated the whistling birds and the bodyguards went down, and he was already in pursuit of his quarry before the last one hit the ground. The crowd had gone silent, and the tracking fob told him that the bounty was running down the alley on the other side of the wall. Din couldn’t see a sign of a door that he might have gone through, but there wasn’t time to do a search.

He grunted in annoyance and slapped a charge on the wall, and yelled for everyone to get away. He was mildly amused to note that the only people left in the room were patrons- the employees had fled as soon as he walked in. The patrons made a run for the door and he ducked behind the bar. 

The explosion was satisfying. Explosions always were. 

Din raced down the alley, following the fob, blaster drawn. This was the part that got his blood pumping- the thrill of the chase, knowing that his quarry just needed to be run to ground, and the endgame was in play. 

This was why he was good at what he did.

The bounty dodged down one alley, and then another, turns getting more and more frantic as Din got closer and closer. Finally, the bounty ran into a dead end, and cowered in the corner, whimpering, pleading. Din stalked towards him, pulling out the cuffs….

...when a filthy child darted down the alley towards Din. 

“....help…” the kid whimpered, clutching Din’s arm. “Please help me.” 

Din glanced at the bounty, then at the kid. 

“They…” The kid looked back the way they came, terror etched deeply on their face, and they were shaking. “She said…” Din looked down at the kid, then back at his bounty. He heard boots coming toward them, and the kid let out a hunted, haunted cry. 

And that settled it for Din, right there. He’d betrayed part of his Creed once, and he wore the reminder of that sin on his back, and would until the day he died. He couldn’t do it again. He wouldn’t do it again. This was the Way. 

A group of ten nondescript men turned the corner and saw Din and the kid, and the kid whimpered again- the sound of despair. Din’s HUD showed that they were armed to the teeth, and they all had combat ready boots on. Nondescript his ass. These fuckers were enforcers of some kind. 

“Give us the kid, Mando. This doesn’t concern you.” 

Din didn’t even spare the bounty a glance. He picked up the kid, said, “Hold on” and activated his jetpack. He rose in the air as the kid shrieked and clutched their arms around his neck. 

The men after the kid started shooting, and Din dodged and weaved, except for one lucky shot that managed to hit the bottom edge of his cuirass. He grunted as the force of the impact caused him to roll in the air, but he held onto the kid and kept going. 

Back at the Razor Crest, the kid had fainted, and he tucked them in a corner before running up to the cockpit to take off, in a hurry. No telling who those guys were, or what support they had in the governance of this city, but it was best to leave as quickly as possible. 

He piloted the ship up without incident, other than space port control yelling about unscheduled departures, like that had never happened before. Once up in the black and far enough away from the planet, he punched in the controls for Samaki. He wanted to get the kid safely to the Covert as quickly as possible. 

He sat back, and found himself clutching his side where the blaster bolt had hit. It didn’t hurt, exactly, it just… ached. A lot, if he were willing to be honest with himself. Which he wasn’t. 

Down in the hold, the kid was still out cold. He wrapped them up in blankets- his HUD readings said they were cold, and he could see they were filthy. He didn’t want to do anything about that while the kid was unconscious- he remembered Cuan refusing to let them clean Teryn’s face- but if they didn’t wake up in the next few hours, he’d try to get some liquids into them somehow. 

There was about 10 hours before they got home. His vod’ika would know what to do. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Will there be a chapter in Me’copaani/Ner copaanir that fills in that fade-to-black? Probably. 
> 
> Mando'a Translations
> 
> Mando’ade: Mandalorians (pl) - sons and/ or daughters of Mandalore  
> Buir: parent  
> Resol’nare: Six Actions, the tenets of Mando life: Education and armor, self-defense, our tribe, our language, our leader—all help us survive.Su cuy’gar: Hello - lit. *You're still alive.*  
> Cyare: Beloved  
> ori’vod: Older siblings  
> ba’buir: grandparent  
> cyar’ika: darling, sweetheart  
> Kurs’khaded: Wolf   
> Verd’ika: private (rank) Can be used affectionately, often to a child; *little soldier* - context is critical.  
> Me’vaar ti gar: How are you? (Lit: what's new with you?) Can also be used to ask a soldier for a sitrep. If a Mando asks you this, they expect an answer; it's literal.. The response for *I'm fine thanks,* is *Naas.* (Literally - nothing. )  
> Manda: the collective soul or heaven - the state of being Mandalorian in mind, body and spirit - also supreme, overarching, guardian-like  
> al’verde: Commander


	20. If you are the healer, it means I'm broken and lame

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Teryn thinks it'll be a quiet day. 
> 
> HA.

Cuan woke up with Teryn curled into his chest, still sleeping peacefully. After she’d fallen asleep while they were talking outside, he’d brought her back inside and into the bed, and it appeared that she’d actually stayed asleep the entire night. For the moment, the cares and worries of the rest of the galaxy fell away, and there was just the two of them. Quiet, simple. Peaceful. 

He would have liked to stay there, but he could hear quiet murmurings from the other room. He carefully extracted himself, and smoothed a bit of hair away from her face. 

His mouth tightened at the bruises- it wasn’t bad, and she said it was just training, but… 

In the other room, he found the small verd’ika playing with the cat, using his powers to move a ball around. Cuan watched as the cat chased the ball, until Jha’iil noticed him. The child’s ears dropped incrementally. “Ba’vodu?”

“She’s still asleep.” Cuan said. “We’re gonna let her sleep, but we can manage morning on our own, right?”

Jha’iil eyed him speculatively. Maybe they could, or maybe they couldn’t. But he was hungry, so he held up his arms. Cuan picked him up, and they regarded each other. “It’s been a while since I’ve had to help with an ad’ika, but you can’t be that difficult.” 

The refresher went okay- Din had made sure Jha’iil could use it- and Cuan stressed the importance of washing behind ears. Jha’iil had solemnly helped Cuan wash behind his own ears. 

Clothes, however, were another story. Jha’iil refused pants. Or anything other than his old robe. It was clean, and patched, but when given the option of anything else, Jha’iil would yell “NAYC” and then Cuan would glance guiltily towards the room where Teryn was still asleep. In the end, Jha’iil won, as he knew he would. The robe no longer dragged on the ground, and he could see his toes now. 

“K’aitome? Are you hungry?” Cuan asked. Jha’iil nodded. He was always hungry. Especially since there was so much running and playing to do. “Let’s go see my ba’buir for breakfast. Then we’ll take you to the creche.” 

Jha’iil pointed. “Ba’vodu?” 

“We’re still going to let her sleep.” 

Jha’iil nodded again, and willingly sat on Cuan’s shoulder on the short walk to Tuathal’s quarters, looking up at the sky the whole time. Tuathal was pleased to see them both, and also pleased to hear that Teryn was actually asleep. “She has had a time of it while you were gone.”

“She told me.” Cuan gave Jha’iil some fruit and meat, and after brief consideration, tied a napkin under Jha’iil’s chin. “I doubt she’s told me everything, but she told me quite a bit.” 

“Do you think she will decide to take a helmet again?” 

“I honestly don’t know.” Jha’iil chewed on some unfamiliar fruit, wrinkled his nose, and spit into his hand to give to Cuan. Cuan, familiar with the ways and means of toddlers, accepted it without comment. “She’s working through it, but I don’t know. She told me about a dream…” 

“Mhhmmm. She told me a little of it.” Tuathal gave Cuan a smile. “I can tell you that she’s less constrained since then. Tired, anxious, conflicted, but more relaxed. She’ll make the right decision for her, I’m sure of that, now that she realizes she  _ can _ make the decision.” 

Cuan huffed a laugh. “I keep asking her what she wants.” He looked down at Jha’iil, who’d managed to smear a good bit of fruit all over his face and the napkin. Jha’iil grinned up at him. “You are a mess, verd’ika. Let’s get you cleaned up and then you can go play with your friends.”

Jha’iil thought about that, then perked up one ear. “Ba’vodu?”

“Do you want to go check on her first?”

He nodded. “Yes.” 

“Okay.” Once Jha’iil had been tidied up and said goodbye to Tuathal- the old man was the only one besides Din, Teryn, and Cara who he would give a Keldabe kiss to- they went back to Teryn and Cuan’s quarters. Teryn was still asleep, and hadn’t moved, and Atin was curled up behind her knees. 

Jha’iil struggled down to the bed, and Atin walked over to give his face another wash. Then Jha’iil crawled over to Teryn, and patted her arm gently. She mumbled quietly, and Jha’iil nodded and made his way back to Cuan. “Okay.”

“We can go?” Jha’iil nodded, and jumped down to the floor and walked towards the door, Atin following. Cuan gave Teryn a quick caress of her hair and grabbed his helmet before following. For such short legs, the verd’ika was quick. 

At the creche, Jha’iil gave Cuan a dismissive wave before joining the other kids. Atin had made sure Jha’iil was safely inside before trotting off on his own way. Cuan allowed himself a few moments to enjoy the sheer domesticity of it before turning his attention to the next order of business. 

He found Atriu in the barracks, chatting with one of her friends, and she grinned up at him. “Su cuy!” She ran over to give him a hug, and he smiled fondly down at her. 

“Su cuy, vod’ad. I need some target practice. Wanna give me some tips?” She nodded eagerly and ran to get her blasters and helmet. Arkil had had her out on the range technically before he was supposed to- standard protocol was that you were seven when you got to shoot a practice blaster, and had to be ten before you got to fire a real one. Arkil had let her use a small real blaster at eight, shrugging that her aim was good and her stance was good, and besides, why punish her for the crime of being too young?

Arkil had, perhaps, been a bit too permissive, and doted on his Foundling, but she’d adored her buir. And she was a remarkably good shot.

They trooped out to the practice range, and Cuan let her set up the targets. They took turns- she had a devious mind for setting up a challenge- and after a solid hour giving each other notes, they stopped for a break. 

“How’s it been going?” He asked, neutral.

She tilted her head at him. “She told you.” 

“She did. Just the bare facts, no editorializing.” 

“I was mad.” Atriu sighed. “I’m still mad.”

“So am I. I miss him a lot. But I was there. It wasn’t her fault. She did everything she could. It was just.. His time.” 

She sniffled, and leaned into his shoulder. “I know. I did apologize and I think she accepted.” 

“Good. But remember that there are better ways to deal with anger than lashing out.” 

Atriu nodded. 

“Part of being Mando’ade is dealing with death. And we have to deal with it with some grace.” She nodded again, looking down, and he continued, “You haven’t had to deal with it as much, and maybe we didn’t do as good a job preparing you as we should have.”

“I was a besom, wasn’t I.” 

He chuckled gently. “Yes. Be better.” 

“I will.” 

“I have something for you.” He reached into a pouch on his belt. “It was your buir’s- it was still on the ship.” He handed her the small bag. “It’s dirt, from Mandalore.”

“I’ve never been there.” Atriu said softly as she took it. 

“And you probably never will. But it’s from our homeworld. You were a Foundling, but-”

“Aliit ori’shya tal’din.”  _ Family is more than blood.  _

“Aliit ori’shya tal’din.” He closed her hand over the pouch. “You’ll have a part of the home that made us, no matter where you go.” 

“Vor entye.” She said it softly. 

“No, vod’ad, there’s no debt. This was meant for you. He wanted it for you.” 

He left Atriu with a firm squeeze of the shoulder and a promise of stories of his and Arkil’s childhood- the scrapes two boys could get into on Mandalore were impressive when they were both determined to get everywhere they were told they shouldn’t go, especially when one had a mind for trouble and the other had the ability to talk their way into and out of everything. 

Cuan had another person he wanted to see, and found the Navarro al’verde inspecting their armory. For a small Covert, the Navarro tribe did have an impressive array of weaponry. Cuan knew that Rima and Ademe were a little jealous of it. 

“We need to talk.” Cuan had put on his helmet. No reason to antagonize the man right away. 

Paz turned and almost grinned in anticipation. He's known this was coming, that this had been coming for quite a while. All it needed was something to push Cuan over the edge, and while the injury to Teryn’s face had been an accident -and he was certain she would have told Cuan that it was an accident, she was many things, but wouldn’t lie about that- Cuan would take the excuse. 

Paz was almost glad of it. 

“She tell you it was an accident?”

“She ever tell you what happened between that hut’uun stealing her life and you completely destroying it?” 

“No.” 

“The only reason they didn’t find you then is because she didn’t give you up. No matter what they did to her.” Cuan grinned, feral. “She didn’t give you up and you didn’t deserve it. You didn’t deserve that loyalty.” 

Paz shrugged. The truth was, deep down, he did feel guilty about it. Partly, perhaps mostly, because that decision allowed Rokr to stay, and no one knew how dangerous he was, how cowardly. But the Way was the Way. It didn’t change anything for her. “Looks like you’re trying to undo it, anyway.” 

Cuan settled back on his heels, and folded his arms. “We are giving her the choice. Something you’ve never done.” 

“You still blame Kyr’tsad for this?”

“I blame Kyr’tsad for a lot. I blame House Kryze for a lot. But this isn’t about the tides of history. This is about how one treats aliit and uses the Way as a shield and crutch.” 

“If we didn’t keep to the Way, what was the point of any of it? We have lost so much, we have to hold on to this. We have _nothing_ else.” 

“If you believe that, then you truly have nothing.” 

Paz growled. “You wanna settle this right now?”

“I want nothing more.” Cuan grinned back, and unholstered his blasters and put them aside. 

Paz nodded, and set his own blaster aside, and charged. 

  
  


Teryn woke up, and stretched. She felt stiff, and groggy, but it was clearly late- early afternoon, maybe. The bed was empty and the rooms were silent, though she had a faint impression of Jha’iil coming in, so Cuan must have dealt with him. Atin must be off on his usual daytime routine. 

There was even a mug of caff on the bedside table, but it had gone cold. She  _ had _ slept. 

It was nice to have him home. Now if her utreekov of a brother could also come home, Jha’iil would be happy. She could talk to Din. Everything would be settled for a little while. 

She got dressed, heated up the caff, and drank it, grimacing. Reheated was better than nothing, but still not good. Lunch, check on Jha’iil, see what needed doing. 

Should be a quiet day. 

H’lava found her just as she was heading to the mess to find some food. “You have to come.”

“Is it your Foundling?”

“No, it’s… just come on!” H’lava grabbed Teryn’s arm and pulled her along at a full run to behind the armory, where Paz and Cuan were wrestling on the ground, with a not insignificant crowd around them, from both tribes. Teryn raised her eyebrows, and looked at H’lava. H’lava pointed at the two men. “Do something!” 

Teryn looked around at the crowd- the short scrapper Kata was eating a piece of fruit and yelling encouragement, while Ordo was collecting bets. She didn’t see either alor, which was a blessing, but they would hear about it. “Fuck.” She went into the armory and found a shock staff and put it at its lowest setting. 

She marched out. “Hey!” The two men didn’t seem to hear her as Paz pulled back a fist and slammed it into the ground as Cuan moved his head. “Hey, turdfuckers! Knock it off or-” she waved the stock staff threateningly. 

They did not knock it off, or give any indication that they’d even heard her. She shook her head. “Fine.” She stuck the staff in, not even really caring which one she hit. Between the armor and undergear, they’d be fine, but they would feel it. Paz jumped, and she pulled back and thrust the staff in again and Cuan rolled off. They both stared, panting, and she shook her head at them. 

“You are both idiots.” She threw the staff at Paz’s head, and stalked over to Ordo. “I get a cut of whatever the take is.” 

Ordo nodded. Technically, she did win the fight.

  
  


Back in their quarters Teryn paced angrily, waiting for Cuan to drag his sorry ass in. When he did, hangdog, she scowled. “What the fuck is wrong with you.”

“I didn’t mean…”

“BullSHIT.” She glared and he slowly took off his helmet and set it down. 

“I just wanted to talk…” she raised an eyebrow dubiously and he sighed. “No, I didn’t. I was angry at him. At them. For…” He gestured to her. “For everything.” 

“That’s not your fight.” 

“Yes, it is. It is my fight, because your fights are my fights. And my fights are yours.” She looked at him, frowning, and he walked towards her. “Ner kar’tylir darasuum.”

She inhaled slowly, held her breath for a second. “Ner kar’tylir darasuum,” she murmured back, then blushed and looked down. “I’ve never said that to anyone before. Not like…”

He chuckled softly. “Yes, you have, cyar’ika. You were asleep, but you have.” 

“When?”

“The morning I left.” He nuzzled her hair. “That morning was the first time I said it, too.” 

“No, it wasn’t.”

“It wasn’t?”

“No, you said it when you were drunk and about to pass out.” 

He stared for a minute, and she nodded.  _ Yes, you did.  _ “Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Because you freaked me out, you shu’shuk!” She swatted him on the arm. “And I knew you weren’t going to remember, so….”

“Why were you freaked out?” He reached out to stroke her hair and she backed up, nervous. He stayed where he was. 

“Because…” she gestured aimlessly, then let out a breath. “Because I was afraid. That you would realize that I didn’t have a soul and then…you would...go.” She almost cringed as she said it.

Several emotions chased across his face, sadness, a little bit of hurt, but mostly tender compassion. “Do you still think that?”

Slowly she shook her head. “My buir said I shouldn’t doubt you.” 

“Did you always listen to her?” He tilted his head, eyes crinkling with a bit of amused doubt. 

Teryn smiled back. “Only when she was right.” She took a step forward, and then another. He didn’t move, and she slowly, shyly took his head in both hands and pulled his forehead to the top of her head. He let out a breath and held her, gently. They stood like that for a minute and she pulled back and fixed him with a glare. “Don’t fight him again.” 

“You think I’ll lose?”

She smacked him on the arm again. “He’s the size of a fucking mountain.” 

He laughed, then winced. “You shocked me.” 

“It was the lowest setting, sheb’ika, and I did give you warning.” She smirked. “Got a bunch of credits, though, because technically I did win the fight, and the only one who bet on me was your scrapper.” 

He tilted his head, grinning. “You’re brilliant, LaarSenaar.” 

“I know.” 

Din groaned as they neared the end end of the hyperspace jump. The ache in his side wasn’t getting better- it might have even been getting worse, and he didn’t want to look. He wasn’t bleeding, at least, or if he was, it wasn’t soaking through, so that wasn’t worth worrying about. 

The kid had woken up briefly, and was able to drink a little water, but was now shivering from a fever. 

_ Hold on, kid. Just hold on.  _

Jha’iil had flatly refused to change out of his robe for bedtime. When Teryn saw that’s what he was wearing, she had given Cuan a look that said, “Seriously?” and he’d shrugged.

“He wouldn’t wear anything else.” 

“Mmmhmmm.” But when she couldn’t get him out of his robe, Cuan had a smirk of his own. “Fine, I guess it won’t kill you. But tomorrow, real clothes. Maybe even,” she dropped to a whisper, “pants.”

“NAYC.” 

“So, we’ll talk about it.” 

“Nayc, ba’vodu.” 

Nobody slept well that night. Teryn had a nightmare that woke up Cuan, and then Jha’iil woke up crying. Teryn sleepily brought him into bed, and he curled up, sniffling until he fell asleep on her chest, with Cuan’s arm around her waist, and Atin curled up on the other side. 

Well, if she couldn’t sleep, and couldn't move, at least she felt warm and well-loved. That wasn’t nothing. 

Sometime before dawn, in that hour where the night feels like it maybe might hold on forever, there was a pounding at the door. Teryn woke up instantly- door pounding was more often than not for her, and Jha’iil started to cry again. 

Cuan took Jha’iil while Teryn went to the door, where Ordo stood, powering down his jetpack. “Beroya’s coming in. Knew you’d want to know right away

She nodded and went to pull on some clothes. “Vod’ad! Guess who’s home!” 

“Buir?” Jha’iil wailed. “BUIR.” 

Cuan hastily got dressed. “Meet him in the landing field?” Teryn nodded, shoving her feet into her boots, and grabbed a blanket to wrap around Jha’iil. The days had been warm, but the nights were still chilly. They started walking to the landing field when the Razor Crest came up over the edge of the valley.

Teryn and Cuan both frowned, and looked at each other. “He’s not going....”

“No,” Teryn said, handing Jha’iil to Cuan. “He’s landing near the med bay.” She took off at a dead run. 

The Razor Crest landed and the hatch was open by the time she caught up, and Din was staggering down with the shivering kid. “Fever, definitely dehydrated.”

Teryn ran a hand over the kid’s forehead and nodded. “Give.” Din handed over the kid and Teryn ran with him into the med bay, bellowing for help. Din put a hand on the side of the ship and sighed. They’d made it. 

He could hear Jha’iil’s wailing across the compound and pulled himself upright to meet Cuan and Jha’iil. The kid buried his face into Din’s neck and howled, and Din patted him. “It’s okay ad’ika. I’m home. I’m home. It’s okay.” He had a few bounties to return to Navarro, and would need to explain about the aborted job, but Karga would probably understand, and Cara would definitely understand. Shit happens. “We’re gonna stay for a while. It’s okay.” 

In the med bay, Teryn and Roccan started cutting the kid’s clothes off. They were filthy, and ragged. The kid thrashed weakly, and Roccan determined that they needed to get a line in for fluids, and Teryn checked for other injuries. Bruises, malnourishment, and they both paused at the weeping sores around the kid’s wrists and ankles. They exchanged a look, and she started to clean them. 

“Where…” the kid looked around, eyes wide with fright, but was too weak to do much else. 

“You’re safe.” Teryn said. 

The kid suddenly relaxed and Teryn glanced over to see Din in the doorway, Jha’iil exhaustedly cuddled into his shoulder. “Mandalorians?”

Teryn nodded. “Yes, you’re with Mandalorians. You’re safe here. We’re gonna have you feeling better soon.” 

“I need… belt.” Teryn nodded at the pile of rags and Din slowly rummaged through them and pulled out a worn belt with a small pouch on it. 

The kid took the pouch and opened it and shook out a small piece of metal. “She said.. Show this.” 

Teryn paused what she was doing, and carefully took it.

It was a mythosaur amulet. 

Roccan froze at the sight. “Oh, fuck.” 

“Get alor.” Teryn snapped at one of people lurking out in the hall, trying to see what was going on. 

“Which one?”

“Both!” She returned her attention to the kid, wrapping his hand around the amulet. “Rest.” The kid nodded and closed their eyes, slipping down into unconsciousness.

Jha’iil let out a sudden wail. “Ba’vodu! Buir! Kadala!” Teryn looked up to see Din stagger against the wall, unable to hold himself up any longer. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mando'a translations 
> 
> verd’ika: private (rank) Can be used affectionately, often to a child; *little soldier* - context is critical.  
> Ba’vodu: Parent's sibling  
> K’aitome: Food  
> ba’buir: Grandparent  
> Su cuy: Hi!  
> vod’ad: Sibling's child  
> buir: Parent  
> besom: ill-mannered lout, unhygienic person, someone with no manners (in Mandalorian terms)  
> Vor entye: Thank you (lit. *I accept a debt*)  
> al'verde: Commander  
> utreekov: fool, idiot (lit. emptyhead)  
> alor: chief  
> Ner kar’tylir darasuum: I love you  
> cyar’ika: sweetheart, darling  
> shu’shuk: disaster  
> sheb’ika: butt, tush (diminutive of shebs) - kids' word but sometimes used ironically or in humour  
> LaarSenaar: Songbird  
> Nayc: no  
> Beroya: bounty hunter  
> ad’ika: little one  
> Kadala: Wounded, hurt.


	21. For the world's more full of weeping than you can understand

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is basically a bunch of soft competency porn.

Teryn said a rude word that even made Roccan blanch. “You got this?” She nodded down at the kid, and Roccan nodded back. She quickly slid her hands under the sterilizing light, yelling for a stretcher. 

All of the Samaki medics had been woken up, and Tabor stumbled in, only half dressed. If the situation hadn’t been so chaotic, she would have given him a hard time for not having all his armor on, but that chop busting could wait. “Scan. Now.” 

Jha’iil’s wails had gone silent and she looked around- Cuan was nearby, she could just tell. Jha’iil needed someone he trusted at the moment, not to be thrust in the arms of just anyone nearby. “Kurs’khaded!” she bellowed. “Take the verd’ika.” 

Cuan appeared and scooped up Jha’iil, whose eyes were wide and terrified. “Should I take him out?”

Teryn nodded. “Not far, and he will yell.” Cuan nodded and ducked out, and right on cue, Jha’iil started howling. Teryn consciously put Jha’iil’s emotions aside, along with her own, and looked at the scan. 

_Internal bleeding, looks like a lot. Scorch mark on the undergear at the edge of the cuirass. Probably the concussion from incomplete absorption of a blaster bolt._ She started removing the armor as quickly as possible, and Tabor jumped into help. He knew this procedure well. They got Din down to just his undershirt and Teryn quickly sniffed the gambason. 

Tabor tilted his head. “Blood?”

“None.” She set it aside and cut off the undershirt and hissed. There was a huge, ugly purple bruise spreading across Din’s lower abdomen. “Get the hood.” 

Tabor nodded and ran to the supply room while Teryn gently prodded the area. Din groaned quietly. She murmured, “K’atini” and looked at the scan again. _Ah, there’s the tear. Small, this bleed’s been going for several hours. Probably gonna have some clots to get out. Not great, but not complicated._

“I finally get to rummage around in your guts like I’ve been threatening to do ever since you stole the last piece of uj cake that was supposed to be for _my_ name day when I turned eleven. I might put everything back right, or maybe I won’t.” 

Din groaned again. “Been holding that grudge a while.” 

“Oh, yes.” Tabor came back with the anesthetic hood. It hooked up to a helmet’s ventilator and allowed the medical staff to control the anesthesia without needing to remove a helmet. Roccan watched in interest as he managed the fluids going into the kid. “So that’s how you do it.”

“One way.” Teryn held the hood in front of Din’s visor. “Gonna put this on, and when you wake up you’ll feel a lot better.” 

“Where- Jha’iil…please...” 

Teryn flicked her eyes to the scan and nodded. “Quickly.” She jerked her chin at Tabor, who ran off. Teryn put a hand on Din’s hand and squeezed. He squeezed back. 

“The kid?” 

“Getting fluids. Good thing you got them here. We’ll take care of them.” She didn’t ask for details- he needed to save his strength for Jha’iil, and he could fill them in when he woke up. Cuan came in with Jha’iil who looked so small and so frightened. 

“Buir?” The whisper was heartbreaking. He held up his hand, and then put it down when Din shook his head weakly. 

“Ad’ika, ner kar’tylir darasuum. It’ll be okay. Ba’vodu’s gonna take care of it. Ner kar’tylir… darasuum.” Din put his hand on Jha’iil’s head, and Jha’iil gripped his wrist. “It’s okay. Go with him.” Din nodded weakly at Cuan who carefully picked up the kid 

Teryn nodded a thank you. “Take him to your ba’buir, I’ll be there as soon as we’re done.” Cuan nodded, and she smiled reassuringly down at Jha’iil. “Won’t be long. Stay with the old alor, okay?” Jha’iil gave a tiny, scared nod, and Cuan vanished out the door. 

“Your ba’vodu is the best al’baruur, and she’ll have your buir fixed up right away…” 

Jha’iil clung to Cuan’s shirt and kept his eyes on Din as long as he could. His ba’vodu was very good at fixing people. He’d seen her fix up other kids and big people and once even Atin when he got a thorn in his paw. She was not afraid, and he could tell that she knew exactly what she was going to do to fix his buir. So he was quiet. But he was so scared. 

“Ter’ika.” Din grabbed her wrist. “Promise that you’ll take care of him.”

“Of course I will. I won’t need to, because you’re going to be fine. But I will. I always will.” She squeezed his hand and held up the hood. “Ready?”

Din nodded, and closed his eyes as she pulled the hood around his helmet and sealed it. Once the gas started, he didn’t remember anything. 

Teryn and Tabor pulled him into the operating room and got started. It really wasn’t complicated, and didn’t even need a huge incision. The hardest part was getting to where the bleed was and cauterizing it. Tabor kept an eye on the anesthetic, which made things go even faster. They’d managed to rig up the view from Tabor’s HUD onto a screen so she could see what he saw, and he was able to point out a clot she’d missed. 

“How long do you think that bleed had been going on?” Tabor asked when she finally was satisfied and began to close. “He should get a transfusion. Right?”

“Hours, and yes. We should tell alor that he’s going to need a new gambeson, too.” She carefully put on a bacta patch, and gave Din a shot of pain medication. “We can take off the hood, now.” 

Tabor disconnected the hood and they both watched to make sure Din’s vitals stayed stable. Once she was satisfied, she nodded. “Bandage, take him to a bed, and I’ll be back. I want to check on the kid and then get my vod’ad.” Tabor nodded, already moving. She allowed herself to feel a hint of pride in how well he’d done and how far he was coming along. 

The kid Din had brought in was as clean as they could manage, and sleeping. The sores on their wrists and ankles were cleaned and bandaged, and Roccan was talking to both Rima and the Armorer.

“How is the beroya?” The Armorer asked, turning the mythosaur amulet over in her hands.

“He’s going to be fine, but it’ll be a few hours before he can tell us anything. Did this one wake up at all?” Teryn nodded at the kid. 

Roccan shook his head. “I’ll find you when they do.” 

Jha’iil had been silently clinging to Tuathal, not a tear, not a sound, just silent. Teryn found them outside the med bay, and Jha’iil looked terrified until she smiled. “He’s okay. He’s sleeping right now, but we can go see, okay?” She held out her arms and he jumped into them, still silent, still clinging, both claws clutching a braid like a lifeline. 

In the room Tabor had brought Din, it was quiet, just one monitor. Teryn glanced at the readouts quickly, and nodded. “See? He’s sleeping, but you can cuddle, if you want.” Jha’iil clung to her for a minute, and then reached out for his buir. He glanced quickly at Teryn and she shook her head. “No, you don’t need to help him. We got this. It’s okay.” Jha’iil nodded and curled up into a ball at the join of Din’s neck and shoulder, shoving one ear up under the helmet. 

He was asleep within minutes, and Teryn sat down next to them, letting out a breath. It hadn’t been complicated. The only real danger had been if Din had taken longer to get home, but there was always an adrenaline crash at the end of any surgery, no matter how small and routine. 

There was a soft knock, and Cuan poked his head in. She waved him in and leaned her head against his side as he dug his fingers into the tense muscles in her shoulders. “Do you need anything?”

“Some caff?” she looked hopefully at him, and he grinned. “Then try to get some sleep. Someone should.” She yawned. “He’ll be awake before too long, and depending on how the kid is doing, I’ll grab a nap when I can.” 

“Is this what life is like with you? Woken up at all hours?” 

“Pretty much.” 

“I better get used to it.” He left to go get the caff, and by the time he got back, she’d dozed off. He put the mug near her hand, pressed a kiss to top of her head, and went back to bed, as she suggested. 

Rima caught him on his way out of the med bay. “Since we’re all awake, I had a question for you.”

“Shoot.”

“Are you planning on marrying that girl?”

Cuna stopped and stared at her incredulously. “What?”

“I’m just saying, if you are, there’s negotiations to be had. Clan shit. Tribe shit. It’s gonna be a thing. So…”

“We haven’t talked about that.” He intended to talk about it, as soon as they had a few minutes to catch their breath, but things just kept _happening_.

“Don’t fucking spring it on me. I’ve got enough to worry about.” 

Din groaned quietly. His helmet was still on, but he didn’t appear to have his armor. Or a shirt at all, but there was a pressure around his lower torso. He could also feel a small, warm, comforting weight at his shoulder, and he reached up to feel. Jha’iil. His son was pressed as hard into his neck as he could be, and felt like he was sound asleep. 

He glanced over to the other side and saw Teryn sitting, eyes closed. “Hey,” he rasped. She started awake- clearly she hadn’t been deeply asleep- and smiled at him. 

“How do you feel?”

“...like I got sat on by a blurrg.” He groaned and then glanced at her. “Did you put everything back right?”

She shrugged. “Probably. We’ll find out pretty quick if I didn’t.” She chuckled at his obvious eyeroll. “You had some significant internal bleeding, which you could have mentioned sooner.”

“Wanted to make sure the kid was gonna be okay.” Din shrugged. “Internal bleeding doesn’t sound that bad. That’s where the blood is supposed to be, isn’t it?”

“Did you just make a joke?”

“....no.” Din reached up to touch Jha’iil again. “How’s the kid?”

“Still asleep, gotten a lot of fluids, some meds. Last I saw the fever was down. Gonna be okay.” 

“Good. How was he?”

“He did pretty well. Starting learning how to swim. No explosions. Missed you, of course. A lot.” She found the caff that Cuan left and smiled. Her kurs’khaded was a good man. “I should get alor. She wants to know about the kid.” 

Din looked at the mug and her smile. “He bring that for you? Did he ask you yet?”

“Ask me what?”

Din paused, and ran through the past several weeks in his memory. “...nothing.” He squinted. “Where’d you get the bruises?”

“Training. Ask me what?” 

“Nothing. I don’t know what I’m talking about.” 

The urge of a younger sibling to pound her older brother warred with the responsibilities of a doctor and a warrior. Eventually, the responsibilities won, but it was a hard fight. “I’m going to get alor- both of them.” 

“I wasn’t… I’m not sure what I saw before... but… it looked like the kid had an amulet?” 

“Yeah. Do you know anything about it?” Din shook his head. “I’m going to give you a couple minutes if you want to scratch your nose.” She left, shutting the door, and Din carefully worked his helmet off. Jha’iil raised his head and blinked sleepily. 

“Buir.” He crawled up to Din’s face to give him a Keldabe kiss, then squirmed his way back down again.

“Ad’ika.” Jha’iil shoved his head up under Din’s chin and let out a long, relieved sigh. Din put both hands on his back and just breathed for a bit. It was okay. Things were going to be okay. He already felt a lot better, and Jha’iil was calm, which he had not expected. He was going to be able to take some time with his kid. “Swimming, huh?”

“Yeah.” Jha’iil’s weight was already getting heavier as he fell asleep again. Din made a note to ask Teryn if she knew how and why small children seemed to get heavier the closer they got to sleep. It shouldn’t make sense, and yet…. 

There was a knock at the door and Din struggled to get his helmet back on without disturbing Jha’iil. He had it on enough for propriety's sake and grunted an assent. Teryn came in and hid a smile. “They’re waiting, let me…” She helped him sit up enough to get the helmet down all the way. Din muttered a thanks and she quickly checked his readings and the bandage. “Ready?” Din nodded. 

Both alors came in and Teryn faded behind them, but remained in his eyeline, arms folded. _You want them out, you let me know._ He’d seen that pose a hundred times before, whether ready to take his side in a childhood fight, or defending a trainee who’d had too much, or being ready to inform their buir why a certain mishap was someone else's fault. It was comforting. 

“Beroya, How are you feeling?”

“I need some time to heal, but… better.” 

“Where did you find the child?”

Din filled them in on what he knew, which was honestly not much. It had been instinct that caused him to bring the child home- pure instinct. A child was in trouble, and leaving them there would have been unconscionable. Both Rima and the Armorer understood, and waved off his apologies for losing out on a lucrative bounty. Rima promised to bring him in a holomessanger so he could contact Cara- she was going to be concerned. 

Rima left and the Armorer laid a hand on his arm. “You did the right thing, by Creed, bringing the Foundling here. Once the child is awake and can tell us more, we will discuss what is to be done with them, but I feel you would not be willing to take on a second Foundling at this time.” 

Din swallowed. He hadn’t even considered that aspect. “I would… prefer to wait to make any decision until we know more.” 

The Armorer nodded and left. Teryn looked over at Din. “Do you need anything?”

“I think some sleep.”

Teryn smirked. “I think that’s the first time you’ve admitted that in your life.” She nodded at the kid. “Are you okay with him?”

Din nodded. “Can I take it off?”

“I’d rather you didn’t, in case we need to come in.” Din nodded, and Teryn paused. “After you’ve had some sleep I have something we need to talk about.” He tilted his head and gave a nod. She left, closing the door behind her. He closed his eyes, letting the quiet sounds of his ad’ika lull him to sleep. 

It wasn’t that long after dawn. Teryn gave some instructions to the medic still on duty, and told them to come get her when the kid or Din woke up. The caff had been good, but a nap sounded better. Cuan was still in bed when she crawled in, and didn’t even wake up when she snuggled down on his shoulder. He did roll over and wrap himself around her, though. 

It was nice. Safe. Protected. Loved.

In the afternoon, she woke up. Cuan had already gotten up, but the blankets had been tucked securely around her. In the med bay, there had been no change. Din was asleep, Jha’iil was starting to wake up. Teryn checked quickly- he hadn’t used his powers. “Jate,” she said, and Jha’iil blinked up at her, then down worriedly at Din. 

“He’s sleeping. But he’s doing just fine. Come here, I’ll show you.” Jha’iil crawled up into her arms and she went over to the monitor. “See all these numbers? These tell me if everything is working the way they should be. And they’re all green, which is good.” 

He pointed to each number, and she explained what each one was. “That tells me how much oxygen is in his blood. You want a lot. And that one tells me that his heart is doing its job.” Once he was satisfied, she said, “Come on, vod’ad, let's have a snack, and we can talk, okay?”

Jha’iil dropped his ears. Her tone was very serious. She grabbed some crackers and cheese and they went to a big flat rock near the river. The sound of the water was soothing, and Jha’iil was worried as he started to nibble a cracker. 

“You wanted to use your powers to heal your buir, right?” She asked gently.

Jha’iil nodded. Of course he did. He could help, and no one ever let him.

“And you know that we don’t like you doing that. Maybe I should explain why. I don’t know if your buir has done that.”

He nodded again. He really didn’t understand why. Yes, using his powers made him tired, but he’d been getting stronger! 

“It takes a lot out of you when you heal someone, even when you healed me. And I know that I wouldn’t be here if you hadn’t. But when we can take care of injuries ourselves, your buir and I don’t want you to over-exert yourself. Do you understand?”

Jha’iil looked down at his cracker and thought about that. He just wanted to help. 

“Vod’ad. Jha’iil. I know you want to help. But this is big, and right now, you are small.”

He _was_ small, and it was not fair. 

“How about I make you a promise? If I think I need help, I will ask. But I need you to promise something, too. You can say no.” 

He looked up. This… sounded reasonable. “No?”

“No. Nayc. I know you know that word pretty well.” 

He chewed on his cracker while he considered. “Okay.” 

“Okay?”

“Okay.” He jumped into her arms and hugged her around her neck as far as he could reach. 

When they headed back to the med bay, Tabor was looking around, and then sagged in relief when he saw them. “The beroya is awake, and I think the child is starting to wake up, too.”

Teryn nodded. “Vod’ad, go with him, he’ll take you to your buir. I need to go see the new ad’ika.” Jha’iil nodded and willingly followed Tabor. Having someone explain what was happening did a lot to keep him calmer. Teryn made a note to remind Din of that. 

The kid was starting to wake up. At first glance, Teryn would have guessed them to be about five, they were so small, but the scans had said they were likely around seven standard years old. Malnourished, but not as bad as she’d ever seen. 

The kid opened their eyes and looked around, small and scared. Teryn smiled reassuringly. “Hey.” The kid looked at her, then down at her armor. 

“Are you a Mandalorian?”

This was not the time for a philosophical debate. “Yes. You’re with the Mandalorians. You’re safe. What’s your name?” She’d never ask this of a Mandalorian, but years spent among people who considered it to be _polite_ and not _rude_ to ask for a name had made it easier. 

The kid eyed her suspiciously, and Teryn nodded. “It’s okay. You don’t have to tell me.” She glanced at the readings. “Do you need the ‘fresher?” 

The kid nodded, and Teryn helped them out of the bed and to the refresher. Teryn nodded in satisfaction. Things were working properly, that was good. Once they got back to the bed, Teryn said, “There are some people who want to talk to you.” 

“About what?”

“You had a small amulet. We want to know where you got it.” 

The kid cowered back. “Are you going to send me back?”

“No. Absolutely not. You are safe here. Morut’yc. That means ‘safe’ on Mando’a.” Teryn took the kid’s hand. “I’ll be here the whole time, and if you get scared, or it’s too much, then I’ll make them go away. But no one will hurt you. We just want to know what happened, and where you got that amulet.” 

“Safe.” The kid . “Mor…”

“Morut’yc.” 

The kid frowned, considering, and then set their jaw and nodded. “Okay. I’m ready.” 

Teryn called in Rima and the Armorer, and before she let them in she fixed them both with a glare. “If it gets to be too much, or this kid starts getting distressed, you will leave. Immediately. They are young, and they are scared.”

“We know how to deal with Foundlings, al’baar’ur.” The Armorer said in mild reproof. Teryn narrowed her eyes and held her ground. The Armorer gazed back, then gave a nod. Rima nodded as well, and they went into the room with the kid. 

The kid looked at them both with big eyes- Rima didn’t have her helmet on, but still looked imposing in her red armor. The Armorer’s horned helmet glinted. Teryn sat down next to the kid and nodded reassuringly. “It’s okay.” 

The kid nodded, but fisted Teryn’s sleeve at the back of her arm, where it couldn’t be seen by Rima and the Armorer.

Rima glanced at the Armorer. “My name is Rima, I’m one of the chiefs here. What’s your name?”

“Don’t have one. Papa said they weren’t gonna waste a name on a girl.” 

Rima flicked her eyes to Teryn and they exchanged a look with the Armorer. “Do you have something you’d like to be called?”

“Papa called all of us Poodoo.” _Fodder._

Rima paused, and took a breath, but a muscle in her neck twitched. “Do you want to be called that?” 

The kid hesitated _,_ and then slowly shook her head. 

“Then we won’t. We can find a name for you later. Right now, we want to know how you came to be found by our beroya.” The kid started to frown, and Rima added, “Bounty hunter. The Mandalorian who brought you here is a bounty hunter.” 

“I don’t know where we were. Papa had us out looking for things to steal, and a man tried to grab me. I kicked him and ran, and I heard him laugh. Then other men grabbed me and I was in a ship with other kids. They put things around our wrists and ankles so we couldn’t move.” 

“How many children?”

“A lot? I’m not sure.” She looked very apologetic. Teryn gave her a reassuring squeeze. 

The Armorer said, “The beroya said there had been reports of street children going missing, and our skraan’ur- our cook- said he’d heard the same thing on Canto Bight.” 

The kid nodded. “We were supposed to be careful, but no one knew who we were supposed to be careful _of_.” 

Teryn nodded. “Then what happened?”

“We landed, after a long time. There wasn’t any food. And only one fresher. Some kids were sick.” The kid shuddered. “They brought us into a big building and they sorted us. The big kids went one way, and the rest of us went another, and there were a bunch of kids already there.” 

“How did you escape?”

“There was a woman- she had a collar around her neck that had lights on it. She grabbed me and gave me the… thing…? And shoved me out a vent and said that there was a Mandalorian in the city and that if I found him, then… then….I should show him the thing. And then... I don’t know what would happen. But I ran.” 

“Do you remember what she looked like?” Rima asked softly. "Did she have a helmet? Or armor like ours?" 

The kid shook her head, and cowered as Rima and the Armorer both made low sounds of frustration. Teryn put an arm around her and asked if she wanted to stop. She shook her head again. 

“And you found the Mandalorian.” Ther Armorer sounded quietly impressed. 

“Yeah. The scary men were chasing me, and I just ran and ran and ran and then there he was.” 

“We can try and return you to your home, if you want….” Rima started, and was unsurprised when the kid shook her head violently. “Or you will stay here and we will take you in as one of our own. For now, the al’baar’ur is telling me with her eyes that you need to rest.” 

The kid said softly, “She said I was safe here? Mor…. morut’yc?” 

The Armorer nodded firmly. “Yes. Morut’yc. As long as you are with us, you will be safe.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mando'a translations:
> 
> K’atini: it's only pain.  
> Ad’ika: little one  
> ner kar’tylir darasuum: I love you  
> ba’buir: grandparent  
> Ba’vodu: parent's sibling  
> Buir: parents  
> al’baruur: doctor  
> beroya: bounty hunter  
> kurs’khaded: wolf  
> Jate: good  
> vod’ad: sibling's child  
> Nayc: no


	22. In case there's a change in the weather

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Din nodded. "What did you want to talk about?" 
> 
> Let us have some awkward conversations with our loved ones, shall we?

The kid -no one would think of her as fodder- was tucked back into bed, with promises of food being brought. Broth, really. It was hard to know how long it had been since she’d been fed. 

Teryn rubbed her forehead and looked at Rima and the Armorer. “Now what?”

The two women exchanged a look, but it was clear they were of one mind. “We will need to discuss, but… I suspect we’ll be looking to see who is collecting these children and for what purpose.” The Armorer said, and Rima nodded. 

“And her?” Teryn nodded to the kid’s room. 

“She’s a Foundling.” Rima said, and left. There was nothing more to say. 

The Armorer looked at Teryn and nodded. “Perhaps help her find a name.” She tilted her head in a question. “Did you have something you wanted to speak to me about?”

Teryn felt her face suddenly become still and closed off, even as she slightly shrank into herself. “No.” Then she amended, as the Armorer seemed to radiate doubt, “Not yet.” 

Din had woken up restless and grumpy, which pleased Teryn more than she could express. Grumpy patients were healing patients. 

“I want food.” 

“In a few hours.” 

“Is this more punishment?”

“No, this is good medical practice. Stop being a turd.” 

Jha’iil laughed. He knew, better than anyone, that when his buir and ba’vodu were snippy with each other, they were good. Everything was going to be fine. He started to use his powers to levitate small things in the room, looking to make sure Din could see. Din nodded approvingly. 

“How’s the kid?”

“She’s… physically she’s doing better. Sleeping again. Had some food. We got some more information. There seems to be a trafficking operation on where ever the fuck you were.”

“Ord Mantell.” Din thought about that for a minute. “Are we going?”

“My guess is probably, yes, if they can come up with a quarter of the way decent plan.” 

Din nodded at her pauldron, and the mudhorn signet. “You’re wearing it.” 

She nodded slowly, looking wary. “Do you.. You don’t mind, do you?” 

“No. I gave it to you. It looks good.” He smiled, even though she couldn’t see it. “Was that what you wanted to talk about?”

“No… well. It’s related. But not here. And after he’s gone down.” She moved to the door. “I’ll get you some clothes that haven’t been cut up. You can probably go back to your quarters tonight.” 

Din nodded a thanks and turned his attention to his ad’ika as she closed the door behind her. He took off his helmet and Jha’iil grinned delightedly. “Buir!” 

“Yes, ad’ika. It’s me.”

“Yaim?” 

“Yes, this is home. I’m home.” Din opened his arms and Jha’iil tumbled into them, smiling. Yes, his buir had been hurt. But he was okay, and he had come home exactly like he’d promised. There were many people that he loved in this place, but he loved his buir the best. 

Din tucked Jha’iil into the crook of his elbow and tickled his belly. “What have you been doing while I was gone? It looks like you’ve grown a bit. Swimming, and I can see you’ve been working on your powers. What else?” 

Jha’iil launched into an explanation of absolutely _everything_ , while Din made the appropriate appreciative sounds. It took him a moment to recognize the feeling in his chest; it was contentment. He had a second of panic- those moments never seemed to last. But Jha’iil paused in his recitation and patted Din on the chest. “Buir?”

“Yeah, sorry, ad’ika.” Din took a deep breath and refocused himself on the child in front of him. The only thing that truly mattered at the moment. “Go on.” 

The kid was awake and eating some soup- messily, like she didn’t trust she’d ever get some good food again. Which, Teryn thought, was fair. “I have some clothes for you.”

The kid eyed Teryn warily. 

“You won’t need to stay here much longer. Another couple of nights, I think. Then we’ll find a place for you.” 

“You a doctor?”

“Yup.” 

The kid stared at Teryn, face carefully blank, considering. “And I can stay here.” 

“Yes.” 

“What do I have to do?”

“Be a kid. Play. Learn. There’s a bunch of other kids. You’ll learn what it means to be a Mandalorian, and when you come of age, you get to choose if you want to be a Mandalorian warrior.” Teryn smiled faintly. “But that's a long way away.” 

“Warrior?” The kid narrowed her eyes. “Do I get to blow things up?”

Teryn only barely managed to control a laugh. “Yes. You’ll get to learn how to do that.” 

The kid nodded in satisfaction. “Okay.” She glanced at Teryn again, considering. “The Mando who rescued me… was he hurt?”

Teryn nodded. “He was, but I fixed him up. He’s gonna be fine.” The kid nodded again, toying with her soup. “Do you have a name you’d like to be called?” 

The kid shook her head slowly.

“Well, there are some Mandalorian names you can think about. Ruusaan, for example, means ‘reliable’.” 

The kid wrinkled her nose and muttered, “Boring.”

Teryn could not argue with that. The kid wasn’t wrong. “Or…” Teryn cocked her head in thought. “There’s a story about a girl who rode a mythosaur into battle.” 

“What’s a mythosaur?”

“An extinct beast from the planet Mandalore. Its skull is the symbol of our people.” Teryn pulled out the amulet she carried- still not around her neck, but always with her. “The amulet you were given is a mythosaur skull.” 

“What was the name of the girl?”

“Lypatri.” 

“Lypatri.” The kid thought about that. “Lypatri.” She nodded. “I like it.”

Teryn found clothes for Din, and then realized she’d left some gloves by the garden… however long it had been since Cuan came home. She went to go find them, and when she couldn’t, she asked the woman who managed the garden, Saojeme, if she’d seen them.

“Oh, I gave them to your riduur.” 

Teryn blinked. “My…. who?” 

“The Tadasco boy. I gave them to him.” 

Teryn stared for several more seconds until her brain restarted. “....thank you.” 

She wandered back to their quarters, frowning, and met Cuan as he was returning from his new ship. Some of the wiring was so old Kata was certain she could sell it to a collector for a tidy profit, and one of the other scrappers, Solde, had a plan for rewiring the whole thing that would be more efficient and…. Cuan had stopped listening at that point and told them to do whatever they wanted and take however long they needed. He was in no rush. At all. 

“LaarSenaar, you have that ‘I’m thinking too much’ look on your face.” He touched the back of her neck with a light squeeze. That particular touch had become a way for him to help ground her, to bring her out of her head, and she smiled at him. It almost always worked. 

“...yeah. Um.” She frowned. “Do you have my gloves? The gardener… she said…” Teryn took a breath. “She said she gave them to… my riduur?”

“Oh.”

“Yeaah.”

“I do have them.” He said, carefully.

“Okay, good, that’s one less thing to worry about. I like those gloves. Um.” She looked at him, slightly sideways, in the way that he’d learned meant she was anxious and uncomfortable about a subject. “....is that something we should talk about?”

“Riduurok?” He asked, and she nodded. “....do you want to talk about it?”

“....yes?” She squinted at him. “....do you?”

“Yes.”

“Okay.” 

“Okay?” He started to smile. “Okay, let’s talk about it, or…. okay?”

“Okay. Yes.” She nodded, “Yes.” And the smile started to blossom across her face. He let out a whoop, picked her up and swung her around in a circle. She giggled -giggled!- and wrapped her arms around his neck. He kissed under her ear, she nudged him with the side of her head, and they grinned at each other. _Like idiots_ , she thought. 

“When?” 

He sighed and put her down. “Rima said there would have to be negotiations. I don’t even fucking know. Stars know how long that will take.” 

“You talked to Rima about this before me?” She narrowed her eyes at him.

“She talked to me before I could talk to you. That’s different.” He shrugged apologetically. There was still a chance that she wouldn't find out he'd talked to her ori'vod.

She twitched an eyebrow, but allowed it. “Negotiations? What negotiations?” 

“The joining of two clans, Tribe shit, she said. I don’t know. But we should tell her after we tell your ori’vod, and my family.” He rolled his eyes. 

Teryn frowned. “My Tribe barely tolerates me, yours seems to want me around, so…. Where’s the… fuck, this is gonna be a thing, isn’t it?” 

“Probably.” He nuzzled her hair. “Still want to?” 

“Yes.” She said, immediately, putting a hand on his cheek and rubbing her thumb over his mouth. He smiled and nipped it. “Yes, but if I flip a table, it’s someone else’s fault.” 

Atriu had nodded and give Cuan a hug and then shyly held out her arm to Teryn. Teryn had gripped the girl's arm with a smile. Tuathal, of course, was thrilled. “The negotiations will be a bit tricky of course, given the… situation… but your ori’vod is the leader of your clan, yes? He seems reasonable.” 

“I don’t understand what there is to negotiate.”

“Oh, clan affiliation, and what name any ade will take, how they’ll be raised. If anything needs to be given, that kind of thing. Does your tribe do the vambrace exchange?”

“I…” Teryn shrugged helplessly. “I don’t… I’ll have to ask?”

“Mmmm. Well. We’ll figure it out. I’ll start talking with your ori’vod tomorrow. I am happy for you both, you finally made the decision.”

“Finally?” Cuan said. “Ba’buir, she hasn’t been here even two months.” 

“And I don’t know what took you so long, bu’ad. Honestly.” 

  
  
Teryn paced outside anxiously, waiting until Din had Jha’iil asleep. It was going to take a while- Jha’iil had been sleeping off and on for most of the day- but that didn’t calm her nerves. At all. It was just a matter of getting him to settle. They had the datapad of songs. Din wasn’t going anywhere. It would be fine. 

It would be fine. 

Cuan had offered to be with her during this discussion, but she said no. She wanted to discuss it all- the Creed, the dream, their buir, this marriage thing- with just Din. She just wanted to talk with her ori’vod about all of it, without worrying about anyone else. 

Finally, finally Din came out, just as she’d sat down to wait, and she jumped up. “He’s asleep?”

“More or less. Had to play the lullaby four times.” Din sighed. “How’s the kid?”

“Her second question was if she was going to learn how to blow stuff up, so… she’s gonna be fine.” Teryn smiled. “And she picked a name. Lypatri.” 

Din nodded. That was a good name. “What did you want to talk about?”

Teryn shifted her weight uncomfortably. “I’m not sure where to start, but… Um. We talked and… me and… we decided that we’re going to make it formal and…”

“Riduurok?” At her nod, Din nodded back. “Congratulations. I know he makes you happy.”

She looked at him sideways. “You could sound happier.”

Din sighed. “I am happy for you, I’m just… I’m tired. I am happy.” 

“Apparently there’s negotiations or something, I don’t know. The old alor is going to find you tomorrow to start on it.”

“Why me? And why him? Shouldn’t that be between the alors? What negotiations?”

Teryn shrugged helplessly. “The old alor is the leader of Kurs’khaded’s clan, and you’re the leader of mine, I guess, so… I think the alors are going to have their own conversations maybe? I don’t know. I don’t see why any of this needs to happen, or why I have to be involved.”

“Well, it is your marriage…”

“That I never thought I’d have, so…. Now it’s a thing. It’s been like, four hours and I’m already a wreck. So that’s going well.” 

“What else?” She looked anxiously at him, and he sighed. His tone was pretty short. “You had something else you wanted to talk about more than four hours ago.”

“Well.” She twisted her fingers. “The alor here, she… asked if I wanted to think about swearing the Creed again. With them.” 

Din froze. “She.... what.”

“She did.” Teryn looked at him, anxious, scared even. 

“What did you say?”

“I said no, at first…”

“At first.” Din’s voice was flat, calm. 

“But now… I don’t know.” 

“You can’t. It doesn’t work that way.” 

Teryn felt all the air go out of her lungs. This, this reaction, was exactly what she’d been afraid of.

Din started to pace. “There isn’t… you can’t just go back. This is the Way.”

“What’s the Way ever done for me?” She muttered bitterly. 

“Housed you, fed you, gave you training, gave you a family…” Even as the words left his mouth he knew it was the absolute wrong thing to say.

“And then it took it away. All of it. Especially the family.” She closed her eyes and took a breath. “We don’t need to go over that again.” 

“So…” Din spread his hands. “What….” 

“I get to choose if I want to.” She somehow sounded both hesitant and defensive. 

“And?” Din continued to pace, thinking this over while she watched, more and more nervous, and she could feel the tears starting to collect as her throat got tighter. “What are you going to do?” 

“I don’t know what I want. What I want has never mattered and now it does and I don’t _know._ ” 

Din forced himself to stop moving. The anxious pacing wasn’t helping either of them. “What did alor say?”

“I haven’t… I haven’t talked to her yet. I wanted to talk to you first, but then you left, and then you were only back so briefly…”

“Wait, when did they ask you?”

Teryn looked at him, guilty. “...after the bonfire…” 

Din frowned. That was weeks ago. _Weeks_. “And you’re just mentioning it to me now?” Never mind that he'd left quickly afterwards. 

“I told her no! I told her it would be a lie.” 

“What changed?” Din was trying hard not to sound angry, he wasn’t. But he was surprised and he’d never considered any of this. 

“I... “she sagged helplessly against a tree. “I had… fuck, this is going to sound so stupid. I had a dream.”

“A dream.”

She looked at him, sideways, then down. “About Buir. We talked.” Her chin started to tremble. “She misses us.” 

Din froze. He had seen Jha die a warrior’s death in the Purge. He’d seen her go down, covering the retreat. 

And there had been times in the years and years since the Purge, even more in the year that he’d had Jha’iil, that he wished he could talk to her. That he could ask for advice. _How did you manage all of this, buir? Suddenly I have a clan of my own and everything is complicated and also my ad’ika is a sorcerer._ She probably would have just laughed gently and told him to do his best, but he still wasn’t sure what that was. “It was just a dream.”

“It was more than that. She said… she said she would have to be patient, that your ad’ika would be a while. But she’d see all of us. _All of us._ ” They stared at each other, Teryn, crouched under the tree, willing him to believe her. 

It wasn’t that he didn’t. But he didn’t entirely trust the implications. “I…”

“She said… she asked if I’d held to the Resol’nare, and I did. I did, ori’vod. I _have_.” She wiped angrily at the tears starting to run down her face. “I have.” 

Din nodded slowly. She had, as best she could. As much as anyone. 

“And she said… she said that there were many Ways but they go the same direction and that it was my choice and I could choose and I just… I don’t know what to do.”

“What….” He took a deep breath. He wasn’t sure what he had been expecting when she said she had something to tell him, but it wasn’t all of this. “What’s stopping you?”

She buried her face in her hands. “I don’t know if I can bear to put one on again. I get sick thinking about it. And there’s the hood and I just…” She broke down into sobs. 

Din glanced around, almost hoping that some help would appear. “What hood?” She shook her head, still sobbing. With another helpless look around Din crouched next to his vod’ika. 

“If…” He took a second to think. Jha had always known the right things that would calm her Foundlings, that would help them. To Din and Teryn, she had never seemed to falter. He was beginning to get the feeling that maybe she had, and just she hadn’t let them see it. “If the helmet wasn’t.. Part of it. Would you want to?”

“But it is!” she wailed. 

“Set it aside.” Teryn continued to cry, and Din sat down next to her. “I’m trying to think about what Buir would say. And I think she would ask that if you could swear the Creed and not have to wear a helmet, then would you want to? Because if the answer is no, then…”

Teryn looked up at him. “I don’t know.” She whispered. “Maybe? Maybe. But…”

“But what?”

“If I did… would you... think it’s legitimate? That it’s not… a lie?”

“Does that matter?”

She cringed away, and nodded slowly. It mattered more than almost anything else, that she had the support of her brother. 

“Did she say anything else?”

Teryn tried not to let how much it hurt that he didn’t have an answer show on her face. But everything always showed on her face, all the time, and so did this. “That Kyr’tsad wasn’t the only Way. That she looks forward to your stories.” The tears started to run again. “That she wasn’t ashamed of me. That she’s proud of both of us.” 

Din let out a breath. 

“And that she would see me again.” 

“So, maybe….” he said quietly. Maybe it was more than a dream, maybe she wasn't severed from the manda. Maybe this was a possibility. 

Maybe Jha had really told her all of those things. 

“Maybe. I don’t know. But maybe.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The story of Lypatri and the Last Charge of the Mythosaurs is here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23916571
> 
> The Purge, as seen through Din and Teryn's eyes: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24305650
> 
> Mando'a Translations:
> 
> buir: Parent  
> ba’vodu: parent's sibling  
> ad’ika: little one, child  
> Yaim: Home  
> riduur: spouse  
> LaarSenaar: SongBird  
> Riduurok: love bond, specifically between spouses - marriage agreement  
> ori’vod: older sibling  
> ade: children, sons, daughters  
> Ba’buir: grandparent  
> bu’ad: grandchild  
> alor: chief  
> Kurs’khaded: wolf (Teryn's name for Cuan)  
> Resol’nare: The Six tenants of Mandalorian life. https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Resol%27nare"  
> vod’ika: younger sibling  
> manda: the collective soul or heaven - the state of being Mandalorian in mind, body and spirit - also supreme, overarching, guardian-like


	23. What have we done with our lives and what did that get us

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Opening salvos, some planning, and everyone gets to sit under their own vine and fig tree. 
> 
> Ha, no. Not really.

Teryn finally went back to her quarters the long way, so she wouldn’t have to face anyone. Cuan took one look at her face and pulled her into his arms, one hand at the back of her neck, the other buried in her hair, stroking, murmuring quietly while she cried into his shoulder. 

Once she had calmed down enough to drink some water, they sat, with him still stroking, soothing. “Did it not go well?”

“I don’t know. It was… a lot. It was everything, all at once.”

“The Creed?”

“He didn’t say if he’d recognize it.” She shook her head. “I should be happy today. Not… this. It’s always this.” 

“I think you need some sleep.” 

“You always think that.” 

“I’m pretty much always right on that score, cyar'ika.” He got her tucked into bed, wrapped himself around her. “It’s been a long couple of days. You had to operate on your brother-”

“Like I’ve never done that before….”

He hummed in amusement. “And then there’s a lot of other things weighing on you. We can be happy tomorrow. And the day after that. And all the rest of them. Go to sleep, cyare. Gar morut’yc, I’m here.” 

In the end, she did sleep. Somewhat fitfully, but having her kurs’khaded there helped more than she cared to admit. It didn’t matter. He knew.

Din spent the night thinking. He was happy for Teryn and Cuan. He hadn’t been sure about him at first- everyone knew that- but he was a good man and a good warrior and clearly thought Teryn had hung the moon. And she was lighter, more relaxed, even actually happy when he was around. Din wouldn’t need to worry that she was alone, and giving her a defined place with the Samaki Tribe could only improve things. 

Whatever these negotiations were, he’d deal with them. Whatever it took to make her happy. Not only did he owe her that, as a brother, as a clan leader, as a vod, he also just wanted his vod’ika to be happy. She deserved it. After so much pain and fear and loneliness, she deserved it. 

Swearing the Creed again… that took more thought. It was not something he’d ever heard was possible, so the idea had never once crossed his mind. He held his own helmet in his lap and thought about the entire situation.

Two things she’d said stuck with him. First, that she had kept to the Resol’nare, even in the ten years she’d been alone. From where he sat, he could see that. She’d done her best when dealt a shit hand. 

Second, that in her dream, their buir had said there were many Ways. It was clear that this Tribe followed a slightly different Way, but they were no less Mando’ade for it. If they were willing to allow it, then who was he to argue with it? 

No, he amended to himself, there were three things. “What I want has never mattered,” she’d said. And that… was true. Even coming with him and Jha’iil hadn’t really been framed as a choice, and she wouldn’t have seen it that way. It was the only way to keep the ad’ika safe. 

No, what she wanted had very rarely mattered. It was time that it did. 

In the morning, Teryn and Cuan went to go see Rima. They had managed to get Tuathal to agree to not tell anyone until they’d had a chance to talk to Rima (and, Teryn had sighed in annoyed resignation, the Armorer), but they’d had to promise that they’d speak to Rima first thing in the morning. Tuathal couldn’t possibly be expected to hold in this news any longer than that. 

Rima had taken one look at them both and rolled her eyes. “Finally. Did what I said spur you into action, vod?”

“I… no.”

Teryn eyed Rima narrowly, then gave Cuan a dangerous smile. “ _What_ did she say?”

“Just that she’d need to know because of negotiations….” 

Teryn snorted. “What’s there to negotiate? They despise me, so they should be happy to get rid of me.” 

Cuan touched the back of her neck. “They don’t despise you.” 

“Ask the al’verde.” Teryn muttered. 

“You told me not to do that anymore.” 

Rima choked back a laugh. “This is the first union between two members of our Tribes, so there’s a level of importance here that can’t be ignored. It might not be the last, and yes-” she held up a hand when Teryn took a breath, “-I am aware that your situation is complicated. These things need to be handled carefully.” 

Teryn sighed. 

“As far as timing… this will require a celebration, and I’d rather we wait until we’ve figured out what we intend to do with the Foundling your beroya brought back and any operation that might be planned. It may have to until after that.”

Cuan and Teryn exchanged a look. The fact was they didn’t really need to wait, they could just exchange the vows whenever, but the negotiations would still need to happen, and the celebration still would need to be planned. “Fine.” He said, in a tone that indicated he wasn’t really fine with it. “We’ll tell the other alor and you two can figure out whatever it is you need to figure out in between everything else.” 

Rima narrowed her eyes at Cuan. “You made your choices.” 

Cuan smirked. “We can elope and fuck off somewhere else.” 

“You won’t.” 

Cuan held her glare for a good long time before finally sighing. “No, we won’t.” He glanced at Teryn and she gave a dismissive shrug. “Probably not, anyway.” 

“One more thing, al’baar’ur.” Rima gave Teryn a slightly triumphant smile. “If you’ll be joining my Tribe, as I suspect you will be when all is said and done, I will expect to know your name.” 

Cuan tried very hard not to laugh as Teryn gave a tight nod. “Rima, did you go along with this just to win?”

“No, di’kut. You two are good together, and she’s a fine addition to any Tribe.” Rima smirked. “This is just the icing on the cake.”

“Humph.” Rima had won this round, and Teryn was annoyed by it.

“Go see your Matriarch. We’re meeting later this morning to discuss the possible scenarios for Ord Mantell.” Rima waved them off, and Teryn and Cuan left. 

Sadet was at the Forge, as usual, and came over and pulled Teryn’s arm towards him. She pulled back, already on edge, and having someone just come into her space was not something she was prepared to deal with. 

“Vambrace.”

Teryn looked at Cuan for some sort of translation and Cuan shook his head. “Relax, Sadet. There’s time.”

“Which one?” Sadet looked at Teryn and at her confused head shake, audibly sighed to himself. “Which vambrace are you keeping?”

“...both?” She looked back at Cuan, eyebrows raised. 

Cuan rolled his eyes at Sadet. “We haven’t talked about that, yet.” He turned to Teryn. “Traditionally, we do an exchange of vambraces with the vows. I assume you’d prefer to keep the one with the shield…” 

Teryn rubbed her forehead. “I…” She took a deep breath. “Your armorer makes them?”

Cuan nodded. “With the input of the giver, yes.” 

“Oh.” She wasn’t sure if the Navarro tribe did such things at all. No one had married in the time between the Purge and when she had… left. At least, if they had, there wasn’t a big deal made about it. Or any deal. And before the Purge was… before the Purge. Either way, she’d have to ask the Armorer for a favor. She sighed. 

Cuan squeezed the back of her neck, and slid his eyes over to Sadet, who was already backing off from this unseemly display of emotion. There had been a lot said in that _oh._ “We’ll figure it out.” 

Cuan had brought his helmet with him so they could go straight to the Navarro Forge. He'd never gone through the ritual of waiting to speak to the Armorer when one weren’t summoned, and followed Teryn’s lead of sitting down and waiting until the Armorer was ready to speak with them. 

Teryn’s fingers fluttered slightly where they rested on her knees, and he gave her elbow a reassuring squeeze. She let out her breath and tilted her head slightly towards him, and he saw some of the tension go out of her jaw. 

Finally, the Armorer sat down in front of them and nodded. “How can I help you?”

Teryn took a deep breath, and Cuan gave her elbow another squeeze. _Just say it, cyar’ika._ “We have decided to enter into riduurok.”

“This was expected.” The Armorer inclined her head. “Congratulations.” 

“Apparently there are some negotiations that need to happen between you and-” Teryn stuttered over the name, “-Rima. About the union between tribes, so… she is likely to want to speak to you about that.” 

“Mmmmm,” the Armorer hummed. “Was there anything else?” Her tone indicated that she knew very well what she was asking about.

Teryn’s shoulders dropped and squared, and her chin went up. “The al’verde told you.” 

“He mentioned.” 

“Yes, the alor here has asked if I would consider swearing the Creed again.” 

“Hmmm.” 

“I haven’t decided. But either way, it is my intention to be considered a member of their Tribe.” 

The Armorer tilted her head in what Teryn interpreted as mild surprise, and Teryn narrowed her eyes. “It has been clear to me that my presence has been allowed here on sufferance. They choose to welcome me, and have from the beginning.” She swallowed. “And I have never once forgotten -nor will I- what you allowed to happen to me. I would expect this is a relief to you.” 

Teryn stood up, Cuan beside her and started moving towards the entrance. 

“Al’baar’ur.” 

Teryn stopped and faced the Armorer. 

“We… I. I owe you an apology.”

“No apology can make amends. Do you know what they did to me?” Teryn’s hands moved to her cuirass. 

“LaarSenaar…” Cuan’s voice was soft. 

Teryn forced her hands down. “Stormtroopers tortured me. For days. Wanting to know where to find you. And you know I told them nothing _-nothing-_ because they never found you. They _never_ came for you. And instead I was banished while you brought the fucking coward who did this home. You assumed he was telling you the truth and I lied. I had to kill him myself. Why would I stay.” 

The Armorer bowed her head. “You wear the signet of clan Djarin.” 

“That is between me and the leader of my clan. Not you.” Teryn looked at Cuan. “I don’t know if I’ll be able to have anything made for you.” She turned on her heel and stalked out. He was about to follow her when the Armorer stopped him.

“Cuan Tadasco.” He turned, and the Armorer was standing. “I am relieved that our al’baar’ur has found a place with you and with your Tribe. Her… what we allowed to happen has weighed on me these months-”

“It should have been years.” Cuan wasn’t able to keep the disdain from his voice. He didn’t try very hard. The woman he met, the woman he loved beyond reason, had been beaten down beyond imagining. The removal of her helmet had been a large part, the torture another. But it was the _rejection_ that nearly broke her. 

Nearly. Yet she still sang. 

“...It should. It has weighed on me. I did not expect her to want to stay with us, once the danger of Moff Gideon has been resolved. I should have talked to her long before this.” 

“You should have. She deserves that.” Cuan snorted. “She wouldn’t want to leave her ori’vod or vod’ad. You know that.” 

“I was unsure which desire would win. I do not begrudge her her rage.” 

“Rage is an improvement on the pain she’s been suffering.” 

“If she wishes to swear the Creed again, I will ensure we honor it.” 

“She has not yet decided. There are… complications that are not mine to discuss. But,” Cuan allowed. “I believe that will be a weight off her mind.” 

The Armorer nodded and sighed to herself. This was not well done. Not well done at all. “What did she mean when she said she wasn’t sure if she’d be able to have anything made for you?”

“It’s tradition for us that the couple exchanges vambraces with the vows.”

“Ah.” The Armorer nodded. “I would be happy to assist, if she is willing.” 

“I’ll tell her, but I can promise nothing.” 

Teryn paused outside the Navarro Forge when she realized Cuan wasn’t behind her, and was about to head in any direction, any at all, when H’lava appeared like she’d been waiting. “Well?”

Teryn rolled her eyes. “You turdfucking gossips.”

“You both came to talk to alor. What else am I supposed to think?” 

Teryn shook her head but then smiled and nodded. “Yeah.”

H’lava cackled in glee. “I told you to get that, and you did! I’m so happy.” 

“Thank you. It’s, um…. Stressful, so far.” 

“You didn’t like being the center of attention even before, not unless you were singing. So… that’s not a surprise.” H’lava started to drag Teryn towards her quarters. “I found something you will want.” 

Teryn glanced back towards the Forge, hoping for some sort of rescue, but found herself pulled into H’lava’s quarters, where tiny Ionnas was just waking up from a nap. 

The sun and fresh air had been good for him. He smiled sunnily at Teryn before demanding a snack then asking if he could go run out and play. H’lava had nodded, saying she’d seen a few of the other children out, and he took off. Teryn raised an eyebrow at the small helmet he’d left behind, and H’lava shrugged. “He’s only five.” 

She rummaged through a carton. “This is crap I’ve been lugging around since.. Well, since we evacuated Concordia. And I found this at the bottom of it.” She handed Teryn a small holopad. “It’s charged and… you should probably sit down.” 

Teryn eyed her suspiciously, but sat down, and activated it. 

A holopic popped up of a Mandalorian woman with two small children. The older, a boy of about ten, stood straight and serious, holding a training helmet, but with his eyes cut to the side, looking at the smaller one, a six year old girl with short, messy hair who had the expression of someone attempting to be good and to behave, but finding it a struggle. 

“Oh…”

“There’s a few more.” H’lava said softly. Teryn’s hands had forgotten how to work, and H’lava advanced the pics- all from the same sitting, where the girl fell over the lap of the woman, and the boy starting to smile, and then the little girl tackling her big brother into a hug while he grinned, their buir holding his helmet with her head thrown back into what was clearly a laugh at the antics of her children.

“That’s your buir, right? And you and the beroya?” 

Teryn nodded. “How? I thought this was lost…” 

“It must have gotten tossed in with my stuff before the evacuation, and I never made it to the bottom of that container.” H’lava put an arm around Teryn’s shoulders. “But….”

“Vor entye. I can’t…” Teryn shook her head. “I can’t tell you what this means.” 

“I knew you’d want it. I know.” 

Rima and the Armorer had been meeting once a week to discuss the status of the Tribes, alternating locations between Rima’s office and the Navarro Forge. For this discussion, they had agreed that Rima’s office was a better choice, because it was more private. 

“We’re in agreement?” Rima asked. 

“Yes.” the Armorer nodded firmly. “We are. Do you have any suggestions for gathering information? Normally I’d send my beroya, but he is… perhaps not ideally suited in this case.” 

Rima smiled. No, he was not. That shiny beskar was extremely recognizable, and he was the whole reason they knew anything about this to begin with. “I have a few people I can send out for recon. My scrappers have contacts in a dozen systems, they’ll be able to find out something.” 

The Armorer nodded. That all made sense. They both waited for the other to broach the mudhorn in the room. Rima said nothing, and the Armorer finally sighed. “I understand we have a union happening.” 

“We do.”

“I believe they would both prefer she would prefer to become a member of your Tribe, rather than the other way around.” 

“Oh?” Rima tried to keep herself from enjoying this too much, but it was kind of fun. 

“She told me as much.” The Armorer inclined her head. “She also mentioned that you had made an offer.” 

“I did.” Rima’s mouth twitched. “We did.” 

The Armorer hummed. “That was... generous of you.” 

“Generous.” Rima narrowed her eyes. “It wasn’t generosity. Normally, when one of our number wishes to join with someone who is not Mando’ade, we would expect them to join us and swear the Creed. In this case, circumstances being what they are, we will make an exception. That girl has been through enough that wasn’t her choice, and I will force nothing on her.” Rima’s voice was firm. The Armorer nodded in agreement. 

“If there should be another union between our Tribes…”

“Then this decision has no bearing on those. Right now, my concern is for the al’baar’ur and her well-being. She has my protection and support. Can you say the same?”

The Armorer took a deep breath. “Yes. Nothing I can do can make up for the harm caused, the best I can offer is to not stand in her way.” 

Rima and the Armorer summoned Din, Teryn, the two al’verde, Kata, and a few others to discuss where Din had found Lypatri, and where any reconnaissance should focus. With a map of the city, Din was able to give a general idea of where in the alleys the child had found him. Teryn had questioned Lypatri a bit more, and had what she felt was a reasonable guess at how far and how long she might have run. 

“So we’re looking at something in this radius….” Paz drew a circle on the map. “And that has a place where they can land a ship, if the kid said they were taken directly into a building from a ship…” Teryn nodded, frowning. 

Kata hummed, making notes. “Should be able to find something out. This has been going on a while, yes? You’ve been hearing rumors about this for months? All over?” Din nodded. Kata made a few more notes. “Operation that big can’t be kept secret. They’ll have needed repairs. If we can’t find someone who knows _something_ , I’ll eat her cat.” 

“You leave my cat out of this.” 

“Don’t worry.” Kata grinned. “And hey, congratulations.” 

Teryn nodded, ignoring the sound of annoyed disgust from Paz. “Thanks.” 

“Won credits on the pool. I’ll give you your cut later.” Kata swaggered off. 

They were all dismissed, and Din caught up with Teryn. “Can I speak with you? ….with both of you.” She eyed him warily but nodded. 

Cuan was in their quarters, and raised his eyebrows when Din followed her in, but merely gestured to a chair while he and Teryn sat across from him. Cuan put his hand on her elbow again. _I’m here, don’t worry._

“I’m happy for you both. I really am. It’s… good to see you so happy, vod’ika. I’m sorry I wasn’t able to express it last night.” 

She swallowed and nodded. “Thank you.” 

“And…” Din took a deep breath. “I thought about what the alor here offered to you. About swearing the Creed again.” 

Teryn grew tense, and Cuan tightened his grip on her elbow. He was pretty sure that her ori’vod was on her side, but she needed to hear him say it. 

“If that is what you choose, then I’m at your side. And if you choose not to, I am also at your side. I support your choice, whatever it is.” 

Teryn nodded, voice thick. “Thank you.” She took a deep breath. “Thank you.” 

“I needed to think about it. I’m sorry I was… I need to _think_ about things, and…” 

Teryn nodded. “I know.” She pulled the holopad out of her belt pouch. “You should see this.” She handed it to him and then wrapped her hand around Cuan’s. He hadn’t seen it yet. She wanted to let Din see it first, and there was something about letting someone who wasn’t aliit see her ori’vod’s face, even in a picture, without permission that seemed rude. 

Din turned it on and the air left his lungs with a muttered, “Osik.” He flipped through the series a few times. “...I haven’t seen these since…” 

Teryn smiled, sadly. “I know.” She tilted her head towards Cuan. “Can he see?” 

Din hesitated for just the briefest second. “He’s basically family already.” He handed it back and Cuan looked at the two small children. 

“This is… you two?” He smiled. “Your smile hasn’t changed, LaarSenaar.” 

“Hair’s a bit more manageable now.” 

“Who took these?” 

Teryn and Din looked at each each other, frowning. “Ba’vodu?” Din said.

“I think so,” Teryn nodded. “Our buir’s vod’ika. His finder.” 

Din nodded. “Not much for the raising of children, but he was a good ba’vodu.”

Teryn laughed a bit. “Always had candy for us.”

“Is that where you learned it from,” Din said sourly. “I still keep finding ice cream in places on the ship.” Teryn shrugged, unrepentant. Din looked at Cuan, and couldn’t hide the amusement from his voice. “He’d hate you.” 

“No one would be good enough for his vod’ad?” 

Teryn snorted. “Nope. Not in the least.”

Cuan smirked at Din, and handed the holopad back. “Vor entye.” 

Din took a deep breath. “Since you’re going to be aliit… my name is Din. Din Djarin. And my ad’ika’s name is Jha’iil.” 

Teryn shot Cuan a small triumphant grin and he nodded to Din gravely. “As I told her, I won’t abuse it.” 

Din nodded back, then turned to Teryn. “Vod’ika… whatever you want in these negotiations… whatever the fuck they are…. they’re yours. Your happiness is the most important thing.” 

Teryn sagged, and then launched herself at Din, throwing her arms around his neck, an echo of the holo. Din laughed a bit and hugged her back. 

After Din had left with a promise to come back later that afternoon to begin discussions with Tuathal, Teryn turned to Cuan. “I should tell you something.” Her tone was serious, and he furrowed his forehead in concern. 

“You can tell me anything, cyar’ika.”

“I know… I should have told you this before but… I didn’t. But part of these discussions are about children, right?”

He nodded. 

“Well….” she twisted her fingers, “When it comes to Creedborn… I… there won’t be any.” 

“That’s… okay.” He said, carefully. “You don’t want…?”

“No, it’s just…” She took a deep breath and took the plunge. “After… after. I knew that I wouldn’t be able to raise any children as Mando’ade, and I didn’t want that, so… I made sure that I wouldn’t.” It had been an impulsive decision, but she hadn’t regretted it. 

He nodded. “I understand.” He touched his forehead to the top of her head, and buried his fingers in her hair. She put her hand on his chest, and they breathed together. “The Foundlings are the future, anyway.” 

“It was something I could control, so…. I did.” She shrugged a bit. “I didn’t count on this. Any of it. Or you.”

“If only I’d found you sooner.” He sighed. 

“You found me at the right time. Any earlier, and…” she shook her head slightly. “I wouldn’t have been… ready.” 

He smiled and ran a braid through his fingers. “I was lost the moment you told me to suck it up and take pain medication. That was it.” 

“You called me appallingly rude.” She smiled. “You called me rude and said that you didn’t get me. How could I resist?” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Hamilton Day to those that celebrate!
> 
> Mando'a translations
> 
> cyar'ika: sweetheart, darling  
> kurs’khaded: wolf  
> cyare: Beloved  
> Gar morut’yc: You're safe  
> vod: brother, mate, comrade  
> vod'ika: younger sibling  
> buir: Parent  
> Resol'nare: Six tenant of Mandalorian life  
> ad'ika: Little one  
> al'verde: Commander  
> al'baar'ur: Doctor  
> riduurok: love bond, specifically between spouses - marriage agreement  
> LaarSenaar: SongBird  
> ori'vod: older sibling  
> vod'ad: Sibling's child  
> alor: chief  
> beroya: Bounty Hunter  
> Vor entye: Thank you (I accept a debt)  
> Osik: shit  
> aliit: family, clan  
> Mando'ade: Mandalorians (pl) - sons and/ or daughters of Mandalore


	24. The darkness will rise from the deep

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Negotiations, plans, and some hissing. 
> 
> CN: Extremely indirect references to child abuse.

Teryn went to the med bay to check on the new kid -Lypatri, she reminded herself. In all this bustle with the wedding and figuring out what they were going to do about the other kids, they couldn’t forget the lost kid that kicked so much off. 

Lypatri had spent several days sleeping and eating. The al’verde bajur of the Samaki Tribe had come by to get an idea of what she knew- she could read, a little, and had a surprisingly thorough knowledge of the relative street value of different kinds of blasters. 

Din had come as well- as the child’s finder, he had some responsibilities. He’d brought Jha’iil, as well. He was curious about the new Foundling. Lypatri eyed them both dubiously, but focused on Din first. “Is that… it’s hard to tell with the helmets.”

Teryn nodded. “You’ll get used to it. This is my ori’vod, my older brother, and yes, he is the one who brought you here.”

“Oh.” Lypatri squared her shoulders. “Thank you for rescuing me. Vor…. Vor entye.” She looked at Teryn and whispered. “The other doctor told me to say that.” 

Din nodded gravely. “Be’gedet’ye. You’re welcome.” Jha’iil peeped around Din’s leg at her, and smiled shyly. She blinked. “This is my ad, my son. Say hello,” Din nudged Jha’iil. 

“Su cuy’gar.” Jha’iil smiled and gave a small wave. She waved back. 

“What will happen with her?” Teryn had asked Rima. 

“Normally, once they’re able to leave the med bay, they go to the dorms while we figure out the best fit. That works best when a group comes in, and we don’t want to separate them too early. We don’t have anyone in the dorms right now… I don’t think she’d do well alone there.” 

Teryn shook her head. “I don’t either. Has anyone…expressed interest?”

“A few.” Rima tilted her head. “Your ori’vod brought her in…”

Teryn shook her head. “My vod’ad is a, um, challenge, I suspect he’ll think adding another Foundling would not be fair to anyone.” 

Rima hummed in agreement. “How about you?”

Teryn swallowed. “I…. I mean, we’d need to talk it over, but….given my….. Would you even allow it?”

Rima gave Teryn’s arm a kind, gentle squeeze. “What’s your real concern?”

“I’m not sure that placing a Foundling with someone who’s status is…. Uncertain, like mine… is in the best interests of the Foundling.” Rima cocked her head, and Teryn sighed. “Foundlings should have buire with souls, and mine…” 

“Talk with Cuan about it, if you want to. If he agrees, we can make it work. If he doesn’t, or if you don’t want to consider it, then that’s that. But she trusts you, as much as she trusts anyone right now.” Rima smiled. “In the meantime, she’ll be with Saojeme.” 

Teryn nodded, chewing on her lip. “We’ll talk about it.”

She came back to find Din and Tuathal in her sitting room with Cuan, everyone with their helmets on. Jha’iil came running over and clambered up her leg, determined that this time he would figure out how to get a grip on her battle skirt. “I didn’t realize we were doing this here.” She said, as she picked up the kid and gave his ears a rub. Jha’iil trilled happily and settled on her shoulder, holding her hair for balance. Din let out a huff of amusement. 

“He likes your shoulder better than mine. He can’t get a grip on the helmet.”

“I’m sure you could ask alor to attach a handle. That wouldn’t damage your fearsome reputation at all.” 

Tuathal let out a bark of laughter. “Shall we begin?”

Teryn sat down next to Cuan, and he took her hand and squeezed it. She squeezed back, giving him a quick smile. He gave a nod, smile hidden beneath his helmet, but it was there. 

“Now, your vod’ika is a member of your clan, yes?”

“Yes.” 

“And the entirety of your clan is… in this room?”

“Yes.” Din said, evenly. 

“Clan Lytau is, even still, large and well connected. Allying with us will increase your prestige.” Tuathal’s pride in his clan was clear in his voice.

Din’s fingers twitched. He didn’t care much about prestige or status. “Vod’ika, you are intending to be part of their Tribe, right?”

“Yes.” Teryn nodded. Cuan squeezed her hand again. “....I don’t know if I want to give up the signet, though. I’ve only had it a few weeks.” Din made soft hum. It was hard to tell if he was pleased by that, but she thought he was. 

“Hmmm.” Tuathal said, “And what is your surname, ad’ika?”

Teryn hesitated for just a breath. “Brennan. Buir didn’t want to take our names away when we lost everything else.” 

Tuathal nodded, and turned his head to Din. “And you still have your birth name, as well?” 

“Yes.” 

Teryn looked at Cuan and wished they were doing this without helmets. It was harder to get an idea of what he was thinking without being able to see his face, his eyes. Not impossible, but harder. And this was already plenty hard. She cleared her throat. “So… it would be easier if I joined your clan, yes?”

“It’s not about easier, cyar’ika, it’s about what we want.” Cuan said, quietly. “What do you want?” 

“What do _you_ want?”

Cuan took a breath. “I’d like us to stay part of my clan. There are advantages. The family name is… well, Atriu still has it…so I could...” His voice indicated that he’d rather remain a Tadasco. 

“I’d...like to keep the signet, at least part of it.” Teryn thought about it. “I don’t… I kept my name all this time because it was the only thing I had left that was mine, but… this would be ours.” Cuan nodded. 

Cuan pulled out a datapad and made a quick sketch. The signet of Clan Lytau was a hooked claw, in the opposite curve of the horn on the mudhorn. “If we have the claw hook over the horn…” Din nodded slowly. 

Teryn nodded slowly. “If I…” she looked at Din and asked, hesitantly, “What if I took the clan name as my family name?” 

“You’re willing to give up the name you were born with?”

“I still have the important part of it, and families change.” Teryn let a whisper of a smile cross over her face. “More than blood, right?” 

“So…” Din glanced at Tuathal, and came to a decision. “Teryn Djarin of Clan Lytau?” 

Teryn nodded, and glanced at Cuan. He gave a nod. “You’re sure, Kurs’khaded?” He nodded again, and she let out a long breath, letting a smile blossom. Cuan rested his forehead on the side of her head, and she let her fingers cup his jaw under his helmet. One hurdle taken care of. 

“Now, any ade you have, Creedborn, or Foundling…” Tuathal began, and Teryn cut her eyes to Cuan. He squeezed her elbow firmly. _They don’t need to know anything you don’t want to tell them, cyare._ “...they’ll be of your branch of Clan Lytau. Which surname should they have?”

Teryn pressed her fingers to her forehead, and Cuan shrugged. “We don’t need to worry about this soon…”

Teryn gave him an apologetic look. “Well….” 

“Is there something you need to tell me, LaarSenaar?” Cuan’s tone was light, even if the question was loaded. Din looked up in mild alarm. 

“Just that there’s a Foundling that needs a home and we should discuss it.” She waved her hand. “I mean, we need to discuss if it’s even a good idea for me to… given the circumstances, I don’t....” She took a deep breath to stop the babbling. “Tadasco is fine.” 

“We will talk about it and get back to you, if that’s all the same to you, ba’buir.” Cuan said, firmly. Din shifted slightly, and Teryn glanced at him.

“You have an opinion, ori’vod, I can tell.” 

Din paused for a minute to collect his thoughts. “Your Tribe is less… protective of names, and my name isn’t... always the safest thing right now, and we don’t know how long that will be the case.” 

Teryn nodded, thinking it over. He was right. Her using it shouldn’t be a problem, she never told anyone her name if she could help it, and understood the need to keep the name Djarin quiet. But beyond that, the name Djarin could either be dangerous to the people bearing it, or bring danger home. “Agreed.” Din gave a small sigh of relief. He hadn’t realized he had been worrying about that until it was resolved.

“Mmmm.” Tuathal hummed. “Fine. As you’ll both be a member of our Tribe, then the ade will be raised in our traditions-”

“That’s… yes.” Teryn said quickly. “That’s what we will do.” She glanced almost apologetically at Din. “I don’t want them to not remember what we look like…” she looked down, “...or what their siblings look like.” Din sighed, but he wasn’t surprised in the least. Or upset. He’d expected that.

“I have one request,” Din said. He held his hands out to Jha’iil, who had been watching all of this with wide eyes. Jha’iil hopped into Din’s arms and cuddled under his chin. “I know… you said that you would take care of him if anything…” Jha’iil’s ears suddenly went down and he looked worriedly at Din. “No, ad’ika, I’m not planning on anything bad happening, but it’s best to be prepared.” 

Jha’iil frowned, then nodded slowly, then cuddled back into Din's shoulder, claws wrapped firmly around the edge of his cuirass.

“Formally, I’m asking that you take care of him if I can’t. And given that he is likely to outlive us both… he becomes the responsibility of your clan, if there isn’t.... I just… I need to know that he’ll be taken care of, and loved. Please.” 

Teryn and Cuan looked at each other and nodded. “Of course.” Cuan said. “We’ll make sure of it.” 

When Din and Tuathal left, Cuan pulled off his helmet and they exchanged a look of relief. That hadn’t been too stressful, and they were both content with the outcome. He grinned and nuzzled her hair and she let out a half-laugh. “Can we just do it now?”

“Tempting, I know. But…” He sighed. “We really shouldn’t.” 

“I don’t like everyone staring at me. And they all do, all the time.” 

“I know, cyare.” He rested his forehead on the top of her head. “I know. But…”

“I know.” She grumbled and rubbed his jawline with her thumb. “It's for the good of the Tribes or whatever.” 

“So about this Foundling…”

“Yes.” Teryn nodded and pulled away. “Yes, the Foundling my ori’vod brought in. Your alor wanted to know if we would consider… I know it’s soon, and…” she started to pace. “Your alor said that she would work it out, even though my whole… soul and… I don’t know if it’s a good idea.” 

“You’re worried that you won’t be a good buir?”

“That I won’t be a good _enough_ buir, can a dar’manda even... and if I can, what if people look down on her for it?” 

“You just always need something to worry about, don’t you?” He said it kindly, with a little amusement, and she glared at him anyway. “You are going to be a part of clan Lytau. You have a place here, even if you aren’t comfortable with it yet. No one is going to look down on our Foundling for anything, unless it turns out she can’t shoot straight.” 

“That’s teachable.” Teryn muttered.

“Yes, it is.” 

“So…. would you like to meet her? And… see?” 

“She’s a kid who needs a safe place, and she trusts you, and,” He smiled. “The Foundlings are the future. Yeah, lets see what she thinks.” 

It didn’t go well. 

Lypatri was anxious to get out of the med bay, but also anxious about leaving. Saojeme had shown her where she would be staying for the time being, and Lypatri was feeling distrustful about all of it. She took one look at Cuan and bared her teeth in a hiss, then hid behind Teryn. 

“Ad’ika, this is Cuan, he’s my… well, I’m going to be marrying him soon.”

Lypatri looked at him darkly and scowled. “You don’t have to.” 

“I want to, though.” Teryn didn’t smile, but it was hard. 

“What’s ad’ika mean? Everyone calls me that.”

“It means kid or little one.”

“I’m not little.” Lypatri folded her arms and scowled harder. She was, though. Even if she had started to fill out a bit with regular, good food, she was still small. They hadn’t tried her on anything spicy yet, though Teryn was certain at least three people, including Roccan more than once, had snuck her some uj cake. 

“His grandfather still calls him ad’ika. He calls me ad’ika, too. And neither of us are little.” 

Lypatri gave Cuan another once over, then turned her back on him. She was still tense, ready to run at the slightest provocation, and Teryn gestured for them to leave. “We’ll see you later, ad’ika. I think you’re going to join the other kids in training tomorrow, right?"

“They said I couldn’t learn how to blow stuff up yet.” Lypatri muttered mutinously.

“No, but it’s the first step. I’m told you should get a practice blaster soon, though.” Lypatri did visibly smile at that thought. Teryn gave her a pat on the arm and followed Cuan out. He sighed. 

“That…”

Teryn took his arm and squeezed it. “I get the feeling that her experiences with men have been… pretty bad. Not that,” she assured him, as his nostrils flared in anger, “I didn’t see any evidence of that, but she’s been mistreated, and she said her father called her fodder. She needs time. And space. She’ll come around.” 

He looked down. “When we found Atriu… it was just after the Purge, and we hadn’t landed here yet. Arkil and I, we were looking for other Mando’ade who might have survived, and we found this settlement… near as we could tell, they weren’t Mando’ade, they were just… unlucky. And we found this 3 year old hidden in a cupboard, weeping, and as soon as she saw Arkil she clutched him, and wouldn’t let go. All the way back to the ship, all the way back to Covert, she wouldn’t let go, except when she absolutely had to, and….” He shook his head. “Arkil hadn’t been planning on taking a Foundling, possibly ever, but she just… chose him.” 

“Kids are all different. They have different experiences, temperaments, ways of expressing themselves. She’s had a lot go wrong in a short time.” She made a considering sound. “I’ll introduce your vod’ad to her, that might help.” 

Cuan nodded. That probably was a good idea. “She’s fierce.”

Teryn gave him a knowing grin. “A wolf cub?” 

He rolled his eyes and changed the subject. “You said your buir didn’t want to take your names from you?”

Teryn nodded. “Some people in our… in Kyr’tsad, they felt that cin vehtin- the clean slate should extend completely to Foundlings. New names, no history other than what was given to them by their new families. Our buir didn’t quite agree. She had us keep our birth names, and she told us that we could ask her anything about where we were from, if we wanted, and she’d try to answer. I don’t know if my ori’vod did, but I didn’t.” 

“So…”

“I don’t know where I was born. I’m from Concordia, I am… was? Am?” She shrugged. “Mando’ad. That was enough for me, but I had the option.” She let a half smile out. “My ori’vod thinks I could just ask Gideon. He probably knows.” 

Cuan snickered. “Probably.” He nodded back at the med bay and the child inside. “Does she have any idea where she’s from?”

“She said she didn’t. That might be true, or she might be afraid we’ll take her back if she tells us. It’s possible we might find records, but…” 

“If we do, we’re giving her birth family a visit.” He sighed again as she nodded in agreement, and fingered one of her braids. “Time and space?”

“Mmmhmm.”

“Like I gave you?” He gave her a half-smile.

“Ner Kurs’khaded, you gave me no space. At all.” 

“That’s true.” He grinned smugly.

“You were annoying and charming and _there_.”

“You thought I was charming?” She rolled her eyes with her entire body and he laughed. “I figured you’d had enough space in your life. I think I was right about that.” 

She gave him a smack on the chest. “You were, but you don’t have to sound so smug about it.” 

It was only a few days before Kata returned with news. “I talked to this guy I know in the yards on Canto- the place is a pain in the ass, but that guy has ears everywhere, and he hard from his cousin who works on a supply freighter who was in a card game with some private security guy about an operation on Ord Mantell that’s been doing shipments like every few weeks. He- the security guy- said that he guarded one of those shipments, but…” Kata wrinkled her nose. “...he said no amount of money was worth that. He didn’t say what it was, but...I think we can guess.” 

“Every couple of weeks?” Rima said, frowning. “The beroya brought Lypatri here six days ago. Anything else?”

Kata made a face, and Solde spoke up. “I heard from a contact that there’s one…. Buyer… that takes most of the kids, but there’s occasionally others who will take some.” 

“Do we know where?” 

“Not any more than we did before.” 

The rest of the main leadership of the Tribes was gathered around the war room, frowning at the map of Ord Mantell and the circle Paz had drawn on it. He and Din had discussed the possibilities endlessly, and had narrowed down the likely places that Lypatri could have escaped from to two. 

Solde looked at Rima and the Armorer, deeply concerned. “We’re gonna go fuck this up, right?” 

“We need more information.” The Armorer said. “Mandalorians asking about where to buy a child would be suspicious enough, but after one of their captives was rescued so ostentatiously….”

Din shifted his weight, and Teryn shot him a small grin. Then she frowned to herself as the others started to talk amongst themselves, trying to think of who they could ask to gather intel. They needed someone who would understand precisely what to look for, and how to report it back, but also could walk comfortably with areutii. 

The crowd got louder and louder and Teryn looked up. “Vode.” No one heard her, even Cuan was shaking his head as he talked with with Ademe. “SHEBS!” she bellowed. Everyone stopped talking and looked at her, and she made a gesture to her face. There was a pause, and she gestured again, looking at them like they were all fucking idiots. 

Paz tilted his head. “....that might work.” 

Din started shaking his head, and Cuan growled, “No.” Rima narrowed her eyes, considering, and Paz shifted his weight to the back of his heels, continuing to nod. The rest started to rumble, some in agreement, some shaking their heads. 

“Yes.” Teryn said, firmly. “Look, you need to use all the resources you have available. If we can find someone who can get us a contact, and let it be known that there’s a,” she closed her eyes as she said it, “...a buyer interested in…" 

Din hummed as he thought. “Karga would know how to find a contact.”

Teryn grinned. “He’ll be excited at being useful for once.” 

“I won’t allow…” Cuan started, and Teryn’s eyes narrowed dangerously. 

“Do you really want to finish that sentence, _cyar’ika_?” She gave him a toothy smile that did not reach her eyes. He stared, and she stared back, hands on her hips. Finally he blinked and shook his head.

“I don’t like it, LaarSenaar. I don’t like it at all.”

“Of course you don’t. It’s a horrible idea. But it’s the best one we’ve got.” 

“You’re not going alone.” 

“That would be stupid and also look bad.” Teryn snorted. “Not having any sort of bodyguard or staff? That’s not the image we’re trying to paint here.” 

“I’m going with you.” Cuan said firmly. 

“No.” She raised an eyebrow and he growled. “Yeah, having a mando bodyguard is within the realm of possibility, but what did we just say? No, it’s too obvious. And…” she tilted her head. “You’re distracting.” She smiled sweetly. “Who else can we get?” 

Rima bit into the meat of her thumb to keep from laughing. Yes, Cuan had chosen better than he could possibly have imagined. This was going to be such fun. 

“....well….” Din said, and she turned to look at him, eyebrow raised in a question, and then she caught up with what he was thinking.

“....oh! Yeah. You think she’ll do it?”

“Yeah, she probably will. She’s bored.” 

Ordo made a rude sound. “The shu’shuk vode are back at it. Either this is gonna work, or explode spectacularly.” 

Teryn and Din both looked at him with identical attitudes. “Don’t be so short-sighted. It could be both.” 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mando'a Translations 
> 
> al’verde bajur: Commander of education  
> Vor entye: Thank you (lit: i accept a debt)  
> Su cuy’gar: Hello (lit you're still alive)  
> ad: child (plural: ade)  
> vod’ad: Sibling's child  
> buir: parent (Plural: buire)  
> vod’ika: Younger sibling  
> Alor: chief  
> cyar’ika: sweetheart, darling  
> Kurs’khaded: Wolf  
> LaarSenaar: Songbird  
> ba’buir: grandparent  
> dar’manda: a state of not being Mandalorian - not an outsider, but one who has lost his heritage, and so his identity and his soul - regarded with absolute dread by most traditionall-minded Mando'ade  
> Mando’ade: Sons and daughters of Mandalore  
> cin vehtin: fresh start, clean slate - lit. white field, virgin snow - term indicating the erasing of a person's past when they become Mandalorian, and that they will only be judged by what they do from that point onwards; like the *first turn of the screw cancels all debts* for sailors.  
> Kyr’tsad: Death Watch  
> Ner: My  
> Beroya: Bounty Hunter  
> areutii: Outsiders  
> Vode: siblings, mates, comrades  
> Sheb: Ass (She's yelling "assholes!")  
> Cyare: beloved  
> shu’shuk vode: Disaster siblings


	25. It ain't so much a question of not knowing what to do

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Plans are made. Lots of them.

Lypatri found training interesting, at least. She regarded the other kids warily, because a new pack always had dynamics that needed to be studied, but the other kids, familiar with a new Foundling, just swept her along. 

While the Navarrow Foundlings had been an unknown for the Samaki Herd, a new Foundling? That was a known thing. And they knew what to do for her. Upio, a nine year old, appointed herself Lypatri’s guide. 

“You’re staying with Saojeme? She’s nice.” 

“Yeah.”

“Who do you think is gonna adopt you?” 

“I don’t know. I like the doctor-lady….”

“She’s great! She’s… well, they say she’s dar’manda….”

“What’s that mean?”

“I’m not sure… but she’s nice. Sad, sometimes, but nice.” Upio shrugged. “And that means you’ll get Cuan, too. He’s great.”

Lypatri looked dubious. She was comfortable around the one that rescued her, and the bald doctor, who was kind of gruff but had bought her trust with cake. But Cuan? He was large and looked scary. Why would the nice doctor-lady want to marry him? 

They outlined the plan, as best they could. Din needed to go to Navarro anyway to drop off the bounties he’d gotten, he’d ask Karga for information, and Cara to play along. They’d need some sort of disguise for Teryn, one that made her role of someone looking to acquire some children plausible. 

Assuming Cara was in, then they’d all meet in Ord Mantell and wait for Teryn and Cara to find out whatever they could, and plan the assault from there. 

“I don’t like putting you in this much danger, LaarSenaar. Not without more backup.” 

“I’ll be fine.” She rolled her eyes at him, and he sighed. 

Din didn’t like it either, not in the least, but he couldn’t deny that using all of their available assets was a good idea, and Teryn was right- they’d be able to get a solid report from her. More solid than from anyone else they’d get. 

“I’m coming with you to Navarro, at least.” 

Teryn twitched an eyebrow at Din. _We can't stop him, so we may as well not try._

Din nodded, he expected that. “Fine. Obviously the ad’ika will be staying here…”

“Obviously.” Teryn and Din exchanged a look of understanding that he would hate every bit of it, but it was far too dangerous to bring him. “We’ll make sure the old alor sees him every day. It’ll help.” 

“Al’baar’ur!” Rima broke off from her conversation with the Armorer and walked over to them. “I want you and Roccan to plan out the medical aspect of this operation. We’re assuming whatever you find will require us to move fast, so I want us to be prepared.” Teryn nodded. Rima eyed Cuan. “I assume you’re going with her?”

“Yes, alor.”

“Don’t ‘yes, alor’ me.” Rima rolled her eyes. “I know that trying to assign you anywhere else wouldn’t work, so I won’t bother. However, I want you to go and work with the strike team, make sure they’re prepared for as many scenarios as possible.”

“Lots of guns, got it.” Cuan gave Teryn an affectionate rub at the base of her skull and loped off. Teryn smiled to herself and went off towards the med bay, where true to form, Tabor was already waiting, eager to learn this aspect of combat medicine. 

“Given that at this point we have no idea what we’re walking into,” Roccan started, “I feel like we should pack some of everything.” 

Teryn nodded, eyeing the bacta tank. “Is that mobile? Can it be put on a ship?”

Roccan grinned. “Yeah, we made sure of that. Got fresh bacta, too.” 

“I thought you said bacta was a crutch?” Tabor said timidly.

“It is, and it doesn’t work to fix everything, but if you’ve got it in your arsenal, you use it. Hopefully, we won’t need to, but if we do… it’ll be good to have.” Teryn started making notes. “We’ll plan on at least one, ideally two medics on the ground, and you,” she pointed to Roccan, “Should stay with the ship to handle injuries as they come in.”

“I’ve been working on my Rising Phoenix…” Tabor said. 

Teryn nodded approvingly. “Good, that’ll be useful. My guess is we won’t be going until the day after tomorrow, so see if you can practice evacuating deadweight in the meantime.” Tabor nodded. This was the first real operation of this kind he’d ever been a part of, and it was exciting.

Teryn headed back to her quarters, tired, but feeling pretty damn accomplished with how the team was working. Having some dinner sounded great. Sleep sounded great. What did not sound great was being snagged by Kreez to discuss menu options. 

“I was thinking of a spread of skraan’ikase…little bit of everything, you know? What do you want to make sure I make? That aruetii woman is gonna be there, right? Maybe some less spicy stuff for her, though she was a good sport…” he considered. “If we have a bunch of new Foundlings, which seems likely, then, yeah, that’s a good idea. Can you make sure to get some of that really creamy cheese while you’re out…?”

Teryn frowned at him, “Do you really need me for this?”

“I mean… it’s polite to ask what you think, since it is for you, after all…” He brightened. “But the cake!”

“The cake.”

“Yes, the other skraan’ur told me that it’s tradition for everyone to feed the new riduure bits of cake, something about the sweetness of… something… so it has to something you really like, because you’ll be eating a lot of it.” 

Teryn looked at him, face completely white. “I.. I don’t… I like the traditional uj'ayl… they what?”

“Yeah, it’s a thing… hey, are you okay?”

She swallowed through a completely dry mouth and nodded. “I’m fine. The traditional… I know it’s boring but.. I like it.” 

“And Cuan? Can you ask him?” He huffed back a laugh as she gave him a startled look. “I got a lot more comfortable with other people’s names in my time… you know. Away.”

“Oh. I never really did.” She gave a tight, tense smile. “I’ll ask him.” 

Cuan’s opinion on cake was that all cake was good, but there had been one, flavored with sont root, that he remembered from his childhood. “I still wake up thinking about that cake sometimes. Not so much now,” he said quickly, when Teryn raised an eyebrow at him. “But still. Sometimes.” 

“They uh… feed us bits of cake?” She looked at him, worried, and he realized what was bothering her. All those hands coming close to her face would absolutely be too much. 

“Oh… oh. Yes.” He sighed. “Yes, we’ll have to figure out something… Maybe that since your Tribe has the helmet thing, it would be inappropriate… we’ll figure it out.”

“I don’t want everyone to know.” She whispered. “It’s not… no one really knows everything except you.” 

“You never told your ori’vod?”

She shook her head. “Not… not everything.” She looked down. “He knows… he knows that there are scars, but he doesn’t know the extent. And they just think… Gideon… No one knows what they _did_ except for you.” 

He took her in his arms and stroked her hair. “No one needs to know anything you don’t want to share. We’ll figure it out. We figured out everything else, didn’t we?” She nodded, wrapping both arms around his waist. After a few minutes, he pulled back. “Atriu is going along.”

Teryn raised her eyebrows. “How does she feel about that?”

“Excited. Nervous. More nervous than she’ll admit, but she’s mostly excited.” He mock scowled down at her. “I can’t keep an eye on both of you, so please don’t do anything…. You know, I was about to say ‘stupid’.” 

Teryn gasped at him in mock outrage. “How dare…”

“I’m just saying. I don’t want anyone to have to pluck you out of midair again.” He kissed the top of her head. “Related to that...I had a thought.”

“Uh oh.”

“Just… I assume, because I have met you, that you’ll want to be in the thick of whatever we end up doing.” She nodded. That was true. “I think it would be a good idea to try to use the hood. More protection. And you might want to…try to get used to it.”

She sighed, quietly. The very thought of weight on her head was enough to bring little flurries of panic in her stomach, but he was right. And here, with him, with her rock, it was safe. Even if she had to rip it off and throw it as far as she could, it was still safe here. She nodded. “Okay.” 

She went and got the hood where it had been carefully put away. Rima hadn’t mentioned it again, and neither had Sadet. They seemed to be just fine with her taking things at her own pace. The hood wrapped around her neck and tucked down into the cuirass. She looked down at it, and took a breath. “I think... let's try this without any armor.” 

Cuan nodded in agreement, and helped her armor down, with a lot of reassuring touches. She kept glancing at the hood like it was going to bite, and finally, she was down to just the undergear. She picked it up, and took a deep breath.

“It’s just putting it on, cyar’ika, nothing more.” He put his hand on her lower back, letting the warmth seep in. “It’s not making any decision at all.” She swallowed and nodded, and tucked the ends of her braids up so they would go into the hood easily. Then she took a deep breath, and pulled it on.

The fit was perfect. Somehow, Sadet had managed to make it the right size and shape without actually measuring anything. One part of her found the weight to feel good, to feel right. It wasn’t as heavy as a helmet, the edges were right in front of her ears, and left her face unencumbered. 

On the other hand…. She gripped his forearm as the panic started to rise up. Slowly she tried the range of motion. It wasn’t bad. The mail was light enough in the neck to allow her to be able to turn her head. And... she reached up to touch the ears. There were pockets for a communicator to go into. That would be useful if she could just…

“How is it?” 

“I….” She swallowed and shook her head. “No, please… help me.” She pulled and yanked and he helped get it off. “It’s a good idea, but.. I’m sorry, I just… I’m sorry.” 

Cuan brought his hand up to the back of her neck and squeezed. “It’s okay. We can try again tomorrow, if you want.” 

She nodded, discouraged. It was all so stupid. 

Lypatri had taken to nighttime wandering, once she was out of the med bay. Saojeme was a sound sleeper, at least as far as Lypatri knew, so once the older woman had gone to sleep, Lypatri would slip out and wander. There usually were a few people up late, but she could avoid them easily. And it was easier to explore and think when no one was around. 

The other kids had pointed out where various people’s quarters were. They’d told her, very seriously, that she was not to go to the Navarro people’s home without an invitation. They had strict customs and it would be very bad to inadvertently break them. No, Fortu had said, not even as a prank. 

This particular night, she wandered to the doctor-lady’s quarters. If the doctor-lady… al’baar’ur, she reminded herself, did decide to adopt her, then Lypatri wanted to see where she might live. 

As she got closer to the door, she could hear the sounds, sounds that didn’t sound good. She’d heard the not-good sounds her entire life, and these sounded terrified. She crept closer to the door, and then, right next to the door she could make out the word, “Gev.” 

It sounded like the al’baar’ur. 

“Gev” meant stop. That was one of the first commands they taught her. Stop. 

She’d swiped one of the training knives- the edge wasn’t sharp but it had something done to it that made it give a shock if you hit bare skin with it- and she opened the door to go in to. Sure, it was technically locked, but not seriously locked. If you could bypass the code within a minute and a half, was it really locked? Lyptari did not think so. 

Inside, she could hear the sounds coming from another room, and another person talking. She crept forward, knife held at the ready, and peered through the door. 

Cuan had been asleep when Teryn started to whimper. It had seemed that the nightmares had gotten better, that she was sleeping better than she had been. There really was no where to go but up, but even so, he felt like there had been progress. Waking up to hearing her whimpering in fear, and starting to twitch and shake was still something that made his heart clench- probably always would.

 _Your fights are my fights_ , but he couldn’t fight the ones that raged in her mind. 

“LaarSenaar,” he shook her gently. “Wake up. It’s a dream. Gar morut’yc.” That usually was enough to bring her back, but this time she pulled away and curled into a ball.

“Nayc! Gev!” She repeated it, several times, getting louder and louder, more and more desperate, more and more terrified. 

He shook her again, harder. “Teryn, cyar’ika please, _please_ , wake up.” She wailed, pulling herself tighter into a ball, until finally, out of desperation to find something, anything that might break the cycle in her head, he muttered, “Ni ceta, cyare, ni ceta, I am so sorry” and cupped one hand on her cheek firmly. 

She shrieked and pulled herself away from him, eyes open, at least, and ended shaking against the wall. She stared through him, breathing in short, tight gasps.

“LaarSenaar…” he held out both hands, as she blinked, and just as her gasps began to loosen, the door to the sleeping room burst open, and Lypatri charged in holding the knife, teeth bared.

“Get away from her!” 

Teryn started and backed into the wall, and began to crouch down, trembling. Cuan gaped- there was no other word for it. “Ad’ika…”

Lypatri shrieked and charged at him, and he disarmed her by grabbing the knife by the blade, wincing a bit at the shocks from the blade, and catching her by the arm- firmly, not harshly. “What…”

“Leave her alone!” Lypatri wiggled herself out of his grasp and planted herself in front of Teryn, who was still not entirely seeing what was happening around her. Lypatri’s fists were clenched and her eyes were bright with fury. 

“Ad’ika, she’s okay. I’m not hurting her.” Cuan put the knife down and held out his hands. “I can see you want to protect her… she needs to rest, but see? I’m not hurting her.” 

“She was screaming at you to stop.”

He shook his head. “It was a nightmare. Look.” Teryn was looking around, blinking, and Lypatri hesitantly put a hand on her arm. Teryn shook her head, looked down at her and frowned, confused.

“Ad’ika?” 

“She wanted to protect you, LaarSenaar. I’ll get you some water.” He looked at Lypatri and jerked his head. “Come on, ad’ika.” The girl looked at him with deep distrust, then back at Teryn. Teryn gave her a tired nod and curled back up in the bed, still shaking. With a sigh that Din would be proud of, Lypatri followed Cuan out of the room. 

“What happened?”

“Many years ago, some bad people hurt her very badly. She has nightmares, sometimes.” _More than sometimes._

“Oh.” Lypatri thought about this. “Are they dead?”

“...most of them.” 

Lypatri nodded. “Good.” 

“Does Saojeme know you’re out?”

Lypatri squirmed. “No.”

“Hm.” He shook his head. “I’d walk you back, but I don’t want to leave her right now. You can sleep here.” 

“I’m not in trouble?”

“You’re definitely in trouble, but we’ll deal with it in the morning.” He got two glasses of water and handed one to Lypatri and nodded at the couch. “You ever meet a loth cat?”

Lypatri shook her head slowly. Cuan grinned. “You’re gonna.” He tossed her a blanket and a pillow. “Go to sleep, ad’ika. You’re brave. You have Mandokar. We’ll talk in the morning. All of us.” Lypatri nodded, and curled up on the couch. When he went back into the sleeping room, Lypatri crept to peek through the door, just to make sure he was telling the truth

The al’baar’ur looked up at him when he came in, and sat up enough to drink some of the water, while he gently put a hand on the back of her neck, and murmured quietly. She nodded, put down the glass, and curled up into his chest. He rubbed her back and she flinched, whimpering. He moved his hand to her head, and looked very sad. He kept quietly talking, soothing, gentle.

She could hear him saying “Morut’yc” over and over again, as he stroked her hair over and over, and the al’baar’ur’s eyes began to drift shut. Lypatri crept back to the couch and curled up to sleep. 

He was the complete opposite of what she thought. Maybe he wasn’t so bad.

Teryn woke up, groggy and not feeling rested in the least, with Cuan mostly on top of her. That part she didn’t mind. His weight was comforting, and grounding, like a breathing weighted blanket. That, at least, was real. She rubbed her eyes and started the delicate process of extracting herself without waking him up- always a challenge and she was usually not successful. 

She wasn’t this time, either, and he gave her a worried smile. “Vaar’tur. How are you?” 

“Like...not great.” She traced down his face. “It was a rough night, wasn’t it?”

He nodded. “You had a nightmare, and you weren’t waking up. I had to… cyare, I’m sorry, but I had to…” he sighed. “I couldn’t think of anything else that would work, so I touched…”

“Oh.” She nodded. “That was you.” 

“Ni ceta, LaarSenaar.”

She cupped his cheek and stroked his lips with her thumb. “It’s… it worked. Please don’t do it again.” He nodded, twining his fingers in her hair. 

“It hasn’t been that bad in a while.” She shook her head. “Any idea what set it off?” He frowned worriedly. “Was it the hood?”

“I think that was part of it.” She admitted. “And the… cake… and…” her voice broke a little

“...and?” 

“It occurred to me that the last time I went on an operation was...well…” When her helmet was taken.

“Mmm.” He hummed, soothing. “That won’t happen again.”

“It can’t, can it?” she said, so softly he almost didn’t hear it. They lay quietly for a bit, existing together. She frowned. “Do I remember… the ad’ika threatening you?”

He chuckled lightly. “Yes, she broke in to defend you, she said she could hear you outside.” Teryn glanced at the windows worriedly, and he bit back another laugh. “They’re only soundproof when they’re closed.” 

“Is she back…?”

“No, I had her sleep on the couch… at least, I hope she stayed put. It was late, I didn’t want to send her by herself or leave you alone. After you went back to sleep, I let Saojeme know where she was.” He smiled. “She knew that Lypatri had snuck out. She's been doing that.” 

“Of course she has.” Teryn pulled herself out of bed. “She’s probably waiting for the executioner right now. We should put her out of her misery.” 

“She charged me with a training knife. You should be proud.” He grinned, full of pride himself. “You’re right. She is a wolf cub.” 

Out in the sitting room, Lypatri was not anxiously waiting for the executioner. She was still asleep, being watched over by Atin. Atin, for his part, did not approve of this new kitten, and gave Teryn a look of utter betrayal, before going to the front door and demanding to be let out. Breakfast could _wait._

Teryn shook the kid awake. Lypatri jerked awake right away, and eyed Teryn and Cuan dubiously. 

“Morning.” 

“‘orning,” Lypatri muttered. “Now you’re gonna send me away.” 

“No, ad’ika, we’re not. I mean, yes, you do have to go back to Saojeme’s. But you were very brave.” Cuan said. She eyed him narrowly. He and Teryn both sat down so they weren’t looming over her. 

“You shouldn’t be wandering around at night. How did you get in, anyway? The door was locked.” 

She shrugged. “Code wasn’t hard to bypass.” 

Teryn tried to hide a smile as she shook her head, but it was impossible. “I have a feeling your education was... interesting. Do you know how old you are?” 

“I think eight.” Lypatri looked at them both, worried and thinking. “What’s gonna happen to me? The other kids want to know who’s gonna adopt me.” 

“Well,” Teryn said, looking at Cuan. He nodded, and smiled. “We were thinking that we would. If you want.” 

Lypatri visibly relaxed. “Oh.” she said, trying to sound casual about it. “That would be okay.” She ducked her head to hide the feelings that threatened to leak out of her eyes. 

“We could do it at the riduurok celebration…” Cuan said, and Teryn shook her head. “No?”

“No, she doesn’t want to share her name day with us. This is something she gets to have all her own. After.” 

Lypatri’s eyes got big. The idea of having something that big to herself was almost more than she could comprehend. “Can I ask you something?” Teryn nodded. Lypatri looked at Cuan. “You said I had mandokar. What’s that?”

He smiled proudly. “It means the right stuff for a Mandalorian. Aggression, loyalty, tenacity… you didn’t hesitate to come in to protect her. With just a practice knife and three days of training. You’re going to do just fine.” 

Lypatri looked at Teryn. “He said some bad people hurt you.” Teryn nodded. “And he said they’re mostly dead.” 

Teryn raised an eyebrow at Cuan. _Inappropriate._ He shrugged. “She asked.” Teryn rolled her eyes at him, and then nodded at Lypatri. 

“Yes, most of them.” 

“But you still have bad dreams?” Teryn nodded again. Lypatri thought it over. “If they all die, will they stop?”

“Probably not, Kurs’ika. It doesn’t work that way.” Teryn resisted the urge to say, _Worth trying though._

“What’s a kurs’ika?” Lypatri frowned suspiciously. 

Cuan ruffled Lypatri’s hair fondly. “It means wolf cub.” 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> T liking a basic cake is me. I love a really good white vanilla cake. 
> 
> Mando'a translations
> 
> dar’manda: a state of not being Mandalorian - not an outsider, but one who has lost his heritage, and so his identity and his soul - regarded with absolute dread by most traditional-minded Mando'ade  
> LaarSenaar: Songbird  
> ad’ika: child, kid  
> Al’baar’ur: Doctor  
> alor: chief  
> skraan’ikase: assorted small snacks like meze or tapas - *small eats* - a celebratory meal for Mandos because it can take hours to eat, and the dishes are often fiddly, a contrast to the easy-to-eat, quick meals necessary in the field  
> aruetii: Outsider  
> skraan’ur: Cook  
> riduur: Spouse (plural riduure)  
> Uj'ayl: thick scented syrup used in cooking  
> sont: like ginger root  
> ori’vod: Older sibling  
> cyar’ika: Sweetheart  
> Gar morut’yc: You're safe  
> Ni ceta: sorry (lit: I kneel) groveling apology - rare  
> cyare: beloved  
> Mandokar: the *right stuff*, the epitome of Mando virtue - a blend of aggression, tenacity, loyalty and a lust for life  
> Vaar’tur: Morning  
> riduurok: love bond, specifically between spouses - marriage agreement


	26. Maybe I was dreaming of a garden

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A short interlude in which Lypatri has some important questions about what her life will be like now.

The question of who would take her was settled… at least, the adults all seemed to think it was settled, but Lypatri would wait and see. She had some questions.

Actually, she had a lot of questions. Chief among them was…

“What do I call you?” The al’baar’ur had come to take her for a walk and to talk. She and Cuan were leaving the next day for a mission to find the people who had kidnapped Lypatri, but they didn’t want to leave without having some time to get to know each other.

“Once we adopt you, formally, we will be your buire. You can call us Buir, or Bu.”

“....both of you?”

“In Mando’a, the word for mother and father is the same. Buir.” Teryn smiled faintly. “Bu is kind of like… mom or dad. You’ll also have a ba’vodu, an uncle.”

“Your brother.” Lypatri frowned. “Ori…. something?” 

“Ori’vod.” Teryn smiled and nodded. “And his ad’ika will be your ba’vodu’ad. Cousin. You’ll have another cousin, too, and a great-grandfather.”

“The old guy?” Lypatri had met him. “The blind one. Tua…. Tuathal.” 

“That’s him.” Teryn led her back to her and Cuan’s quarters, and raised an eyebrow at Lypatri. “No going through doors that are locked, even if you can get around the codes.”

Lypatri eyed her cannily. “What about doors that aren’t locked?” 

“....I’d tell you to use your best judgement, but… I don’t trust that yet.” 

Lypatri grumbled, and then took a look around. “He said you had a loth cat. I didn’t see one.” 

Teryn smiled. “He doesn’t always like children. Just my vod’ad -my nephew,” she added at Lypatri’s confused look. “But he’ll grow to like you.” 

Lypatri looked dubious and sat on the couch. “So I’ll sleep here?”

“Oh, of course not, ad’ika. You’ll have your own room.” Teryn smiled gently and opened the door to the other sleeping room. “This will be yours, Kurs’ika.”

Lypatri sat frozen on the couch, eyes huge. “What….That’s mine?” Teryn nodded. “All mine?” She slowly got up and crept to the door and looked inside, peeking. “It’s huge.”

It wasn’t. It possibly had been intended as a small study, but for someone who clearly had never had a space of her own, it was palatial. There was a bed, but no bedding of any kind. Some shelves, a small desk, and a window. 

Teryn pointed to the door. “There’s a lock. We’ll be able to get in, but we promise we won’t, unless we have to for safety reasons, okay?” Lypatri cut her eyes to Teryn warily. Teryn paused, and added, “And we won’t lock you in.” Lypatri gave a slow nod. Teryn could tell she didn’t believe that at all. The only way to earn her trust was by doing it. 

Lypatri nodded, then turned around to go back into the sitting room, and stopped suddenly. Atin was sitting in the middle of the room, tail curled around his feet, staring at this interloper. Teryn sighed quietly. This had gone much easier with Jha’iil. “Atin, this is Lypatri. She’s joining the family.”

Atin tilted his head, and his ears went back slightly as he considered. He liked his Kit. He loved his The Lady. He was grudgingly coming around on the Tolerable. This was a new Person, and if The Lady said she was now his problem, then, well, that was how it would go. What The Lady said went.

But that didn’t mean he had to like it right away. He regally stepped forward and sniffed Lypatri’s hand, and she shrank back against Teryn, before remembering herself and standing up straight and held out her fingers. Atin sniffed again, and then trilled briefly at Teryn, and regally went to his basket. He had some important napping to do. But he could not go out for his nap. Not while this new Person was there.

“I don’t think he likes me.”

“It’ll take time, Kurs’ika, but he’ll come around.” Lypatri eyed Atin, and Atin kept his eyes closed, but his ears were trained on her.

Lypatri sighed and looked around. The rooms were clean. And sunny. And pleasant. And she had her own room. With a bed that she didn’t need to provide herself. She had clean clothes. And food. And no one was mean. 

And they gave her a real name. 

Sure, the teacher was a little strict, but… Her lower lip started to wobble. This was a lot. 

Teryn put a hand on her shoulder. “It’s okay.” She sat down on the couch and Lypatri sat next to her, shrunk into herself, needing a minute. 

“Were you a…. A Foundling?”

Teryn nodded. “I was found by my Buir when I was around four years old.” 

“Was…. was he? Cuan?”

“No, he was Creedborn. He was born as a Mandalorian,” Teryn said, “But his vod’ad was a Foundling. We have a saying, ‘Aliit ori’shya tar’din.’ Family is more than blood. We create families with the people we find.” 

“I’ve never had a family. Not like… not really.”

“You have one now, Kurs’ika” 

Teryn had Lypatri help with packing for the operation. They didn’t talk much, except for questions Lypatri had about equipment. “Do you blow stuff up?”

Teryn smiled a bit, thinking of the many explosions she left in her wake escaping from Gideon. “Sometimes.” 

“I can’t wait.” Lypatri picked up the hood and looked at it. “You’ll answer any questions I have, right?”

“That’s part of our job, yes.”

“One of the other kids said you were dar’manda. What does that mean?” 

Teryn took a deep breath. She knew this question was coming, but it was still hard. “It means… you’ve seen how some of the people here always have helmets on, right?” Lypatri nodded. “There are two tribes here. I was brought up with the one that wears helmets all the time. And they believe that the part of the Resol’nare- have they explained that to you yet?”

Lypatri nodded. “Education, armor, language, self defense… some other stuff.” 

“Right. So. The other Tribe believes that the armor part of the Resol'nare means you wear all your armor all the time. You don’t take your helmet off in front of anyone but your closest family, and if you take it off, or someone takes it off of you, then… you’re not… a Mandalorian anymore.”

“You don’t wear a helmet.” Lypatri whispered. Teryn shook her head. “He… he said that bad people hurt you. Did one of them take your helmet?”

Teryn nodded. “You’re pretty smart.” She took a deep breath. “Yes, one of them took my helmet a long time ago.”

“So… you’re not really a Mandalorian?” 

“It’s… complicated. Some people think I am not a Mandalorian anymore. Some people… like him,” Teryn nodded and smiled at Cuan, who just walked in the door, “Think that I am.”

He pulled off his helmet and put it away, giving them both a smile. “Think you’re what?”

“Mando’ad. She’s asked what dar’manda means.”

“Starting with the hard questions, I see.” He gave Teryn a quick kiss on the top of the head, and ruffled Lypatri’s hair. 

Teryn shrugged, giving his hand a squeeze. “She asked. My buir answered all my questions. Besides,” she grinned up at him. “She started with the most important one. What does she call us.” 

“I don’t know anyone’s name.” Lypatri muttered. 

“You’ll learn… some. One of the other things about my Tribe is that they are very protective about their names, and if they share it with you, it’s a sign of deep trust.” Teryn smiled up at Cuan again, and he grinned back, running his fingers down her hairline.

Lypatri made a quietly disgusted sound. 

Teryn looked back at her. “You’ll be told the names of your aliit- at least, the ones you don’t know already- after we do the gai bal manda. It’ll come, Kurs’ika.”

Lypatri nodded. She’d been told about the gal bal manda, when she would be formally adopted. Cuan grinned. “I didn’t know the name of her ori’vod until a few days ago. I guess he approves of me.” 

“Why do you call me Kurs’ika? You gave me a name.”

Cuan laughed out loud. “You’ll learn that she never uses anyone’s real name if she can help it. I’ve never heard her say mine.” 

Teryn thought about that. “I don’t think I have.” 

Lypatri shook her head. These two were strange. And not like any people she had any experience with before. But she liked them. And they seemed to like her. “But when do I get to blow things up?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to have this little scene happen, because the next chapter is shaping up to be a doozy, and Teryn and Cuan wouldn't want to leave without having some more serious chats with their little Wolf Cub. 
> 
> Mando'a translations (I'm not including the words that are translated in text, because... ooof.)
> 
> al’baar’ur: doctor  
> ad’ika: child, kid, little one  
> Kurs’ika: Wolf Cub  
> Mando’ad: Son or daughter of Mandalore  
> dar’manda: a state of not being Mandalorian - not an outsider, but one who has lost his heritage, and so his identity and his soul - regarded with absolute dread by most traditional-minded Mando'ade  
> aliit: clan, family


	27. Dead men drinking white liquor wine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Din, Teryn, and Cuan head to Nevarro, and meet up with Cara and Karga.

The next day, Din, Teryn, and Cuan took off for Nevarro. 

Jha’iil was very unhappy about being left, but Din and Teryn had sat down with him and explained that he would need to stay in the Covert. There were too many unknown factors to risk taking him, and, Din had said, it was important to keep him safe so Din could concentrate on rescuing other kids. Jha’iil had pouted, then nodded, then agreed to stay with H’lava. 

Din and Teryn had discussed the question of who Jha’iil would stay with several times, weighing the merits of several people within both Tribes, but Din had decided that it would be better if he stayed with someone he knew. The helmet rule might make it a little difficult, but Jha’iil knew H’lava, and he knew Ionnas, and kids from the Navarro covert had been left with people before. H’lava agreed to take him to see Tuathal every day. 

Atin would stay with Jha’iil, as well. The minders of the creche had been warned that the cat would likely hang around until everyone got home. And Din had agreed to send a holomessage every day (and Teryn had agreed to make sure he actually did).

Teryn had also asked him to be nice to Lypatri, and to show her around since she was going to be his ba’vodu’ad. He nodded very seriously. She also asked Lypatri to keep an eye on him, since he was very small. Atriu had agreed to keep an eye on both of them until she left with the warriors. 

The three of them might be able to keep each other out of trouble. Or get into a great deal. 

“I don’t remember it being quite this involved when Buir would leave us.” Din grumbled.

“We were older, I had you to look after me, and I’m sure that Buir never would have let us see all the arrangements she had to make.” Teryn sighed. “Besides, there were just…. more… people to keep an eye on us.” 

“You would cry sometimes.” He said, quietly, remembering. 

“So would you.” 

“Can I ask…” Din started, and at Teryn’s nod went on. “Why aren’t you doing the gai bal manda before we go?”

Teryn shrugged slightly. “If something goes wrong… then she won’t have lost anything but a maybe.”

The other ships would meet them on Ord Mantell once they had an idea of when they’d get there. Din expected it would be a few days to get any information from Karga (this included an estimated two hours whining that the Little One wasn’t with them, and how could they keep him from his Favorite Uncle Karga? Din was looking forward to Teryn’s face when she heard that one).

Right before they left, Ordo had snagged Teryn and handed her a makeshift communicator that could fit over her ear. “It’s not as versatile as what would be in a helmet, and doesn’t have the range, but… it should be useful.”

Teryn looked at him and smiled hesitantly. Ordo had pretty much left her alone, except for quietly coming for help with an old shoulder injury after she and Din and Jha’iil had first arrived at the Covert on Jelucan. He was quiet, but observant. Always had a quiet word of encouragement for all of the Foundlings, not just his own. “Thanks.”

“I worked on it with their scrapper. The one with the… hair? She’s really…” He scuffed his toe a little. ‘Do you know… like… how they… um…”

“How they... what?”

“Well… express… interest? Here?”

Teryn blinked at him several times and then finally shrugged helplessly. “No. I have no idea.”

“But… you…” He made a gesture that encompassed everything. “You and he, you’re…”

“Kurs’khaded just showed up and wouldn’t leave.” She smiled to herself.

“Wasn’t that annoying?”

“It was extremely annoying.” She squinted at him. “I don’t think that’ll work for her, though.” She thought about it a second more. “Yeah, don’t do that. I’m pretty sure she bites.” 

“I have armor.” But she could tell he was smiling. “Okay, but maybe if you could, you know…”

“Talk you up?”

He nodded, his entire attitude that of hopefulness. Teryn shrugged. “I’ll… see what I can do.” 

There was also the issue of disguises for Teryn and Cara, and the fact that Cara hadn’t agreed to any of this yet. It was all going to take a little time.

“What if your aruetii doesn’t agree?” 

“She will.” Din sounded pretty confident, even if there was a sliver of doubt. If she refused, they’d think of something, But he was pretty sure she’d be in.

The trip to Nevarro was long, and the three of them didn’t talk much. Teryn tried the hood again, down in the hold, where Din couldn’t see. She lasted longer this time, but five minutes was still not long enough to be useful. She was a little anxious, and a little excited, but mostly, she felt centered at the thought of being out and useful and _doing_ something. 

Cuan, for his part, was feeling the thrill of the hunt again. The trip to find the remains of his ship hadn’t been as active as he was accustomed to, and this exercise promised to have the action that he craved. It was time to knock some heads together.

Yes, staying home with his Songbird had its advantages, but so did the idea of fighting at her side. Intellectually, he knew that she could handle herself just fine. A more primitive part of him wanted to be able to protect her. But all of him just liked the idea of being with her. 

And once it was over, they’d go home, they’d say the vows, adopt their Foundling, and go on with their lives. Together.

Teryn had been pacing a bit, thinking of potential personas a buyer of children could be. Most of them, she thought ruefully, would cause her Wolf’s blood pressure to spike. That could be fun, too. Another, unrelated, thought occurred to her, and she stopped, frowning. 

Cuan looked up from where he’d been whittling away on a chunk of wood with his vibroblade. “What is it?”

She looked at him, narrow-eyed and suspicious, then up towards the cockpit. “Ori’vod? Can you come down here?” Her voice was sweet. Cloying. 

Dangerous. 

Din knew he was in trouble. Cuan was beginning to suspect he was. Neither was entirely sure why, until, “Ori'vod, when you were waking up from when I, you know, put you back together _-again-_ you said ‘Did he ask you yet?’” She smiled with all of her teeth. “What did you mean?”

“Um….” Din shifted uncomfortably and considered running back up the ladder. 

She turned to Cuan. “What did he mean?”

“...uh….”

“Because, if I put two and two together, and I get something kind of like four, that four looks an awful lot like my brother knew you were thinking about this whole marriage thing before I did.” Her smile deepend. “Am I close?”

Cuan realized he was holding his vibroblade defensively, and put it away. “Okay, it sounds bad…”

“So I’m right.”

“You’re not… Wrong.” Cuan held his hands up. “I… wanted to see if there were… traditions… I should be respectful of.” Her eyebrow went up, and he tumbled on, “I wanted to do it right, and I wasn’t sure if your Tribe had anything I needed to be aware of… are you going to help me out here at all?” He looked at Din.

Din shook his head, “Nope.” 

“You’re the one who ratted us out.” 

“I was waking up from surgery.” Din shrugged. “This isn’t my fault.”

“I was trying to be… you know. Culturally sensitive.” He looked so hangdog that Teryn laughed. 

“You two are the worst.” She shook her head, looking at them both. “My men. Fucking shu’shuke.”

Cuan grinned at her. “You wouldn’t have it any other way, cyar’ika.” 

She rolled her eyes. “I won’t forget this, though.” 

They landed on Navarro in good time, and Teryn and Cuan both pulled on the grey ponchos to hide their armor. They both pulled the hoods up and followed Din through the bazaar and Teryn laughed to herself.

“What?” Cuan asked, quietly, over the comm link. They’d set the channel so she could hear them privately. She just had to talk quietly. The hood kept anyone from seeing her very well, and it was as close to a completely private channel as they could get.

“Last time I was here, I was drunk off my ass.” She shook her head. “We’d just decided to go back to the Covert, and… I had some feelings I needed to drink.” 

He barked out a laugh. “How did that work out?” 

Din muttered back, “She had regrets.” Teryn nodded in pained agreement. 

In the common house, Karga looked up and grinned. “Mando!” He gestured at the table, and Din nodded at the back room. Karga narrowed his eyes briefly, then looked at the two cloaked and hooded figures behind him. He turned to a man behind him. “Go get Dune.” The man ran out, and Karga ushered the three of them into the back room. 

At a nod from Din, Teryn pushed her hood back, and gave Karga a nod. To his credit, his only reaction was a twitch in his jaw, and a nod back. “I don’t believe we were ever properly introduced.” 

Teryn gave him a slightly smug, slightly feral smile, and Cuan shifted ominously next to her. “No. We weren’t.” 

Cuan pushed his own hood back and tilted his head at Karga. Karga’s reaction was much less restrained this time- His jaw dropped open before he snapped it shut. “Mando? There are more?”

Din grinned behind his helmet. This was fun. “I have all but one of the bounties. The last… was an issue. That’s why we’re here.” He handed over the fobs and waited patiently while Karga counted out the credits. Din swept them into his hand, and, just for the dramatic effect, handed them back to Teryn without counting. She, without taking her eyes from Karga, put them into a belt pouch. 

Cuan managed to keep his laughter to himself, but it was funny to watch Karga take this all in. Karga sat down at the table in the center of the room, and gestured for the three of them to sit as well. 

“Mando, what’s this all about?”

“You have ears everywhere. I assume you’ve heard about how street kids have been disappearing.” 

“I have. It is concerning.” Karga had been receiving the reports, and even knew a few things, but hadn’t been able to think of anything he could do. Nothing that wouldn’t bring down his carefully constructed life. But if the Mandalorians were willing to risk it… 

Din outlined the bare bones of what happened on Ord Mantell, and that they had some intelligence that at least one trafficking operation was centered there. Karga nodded. “What do you want from me?”

“You have ears everywhere,” Din repeated. “You, with all your connections and your fingers in every pie, would surely be able to help us get in.” 

Greef Karga was many things: ruthless, calculating, opportunistic. He was also cursed with an annoying loyalty to a few. Din Djarin was one of those few. He sat back and considered. Din was flattering him with talk of connections. They both knew that it would work. “In what way?”

Din nodded to Teryn. “We need her to be able to go in posing as a procurer. I expect you can help us find a way to do that.” 

Karga looked her up and down. “What makes her right for the task?”

Cuan twitched and Teryn tapped his ankle with her foot. “Because I know what I’m doing.” 

“Humph.” Karga sat back and considered. “I might be able to set something up. It’ll take some time….” He looked up as Cara entered. 

Cara’s eyebrows had been raised in a question when she came through the door- all the runner had said was “Karga wants you.” That could mean literally anything. She knew Din was on his way with the bounties, and she knew that something had gone wrong with the last one and that he’d been delayed. She hoped this meant that Din had finally made it back and that he was okay. 

She allowed herself a small exhale of relief when she saw Din and thumped him on the arm. She was surprised to see Teryn and Cuan. At least, she was pretty sure it was Cuan, if she remembered the armor correctly. Based on the protective stance the Mandalorian was taking behind Teryn, she was pretty sure she was right. Teryn gave her a grin, and Cuan nodded. 

“I have a feeling this is more than just grabbing new pucks.” Cara nodded at the three of them. “You said you were going to take some time.”

“I am. This is…. Different.” Din nodded at the empty seat at the table. 

Teryn nodded in agreement. “I’m gonna get us some drinks while you fill her in.” She squeezed Cuan’s elbow in an unmistakable “stay” and went out into the common room. It was full enough, and she swept the room before making her way to the bar. Plenty of eyes followed her, which was somewhat uncomfortable, but easy enough to ignore.

“Hey, pretty girl.” Until that.

Teryn paused as she was about to order and turned to face the Zabrak who had appeared next to her, smiling in a toothy way. She looked him up and down, and turned away, back to the bartender. 

“Hey, girl, I’m tryin’a talk to you.” The Zabrak poked her in the shoulder, and frowned as he hit a poncho-covered pauldron.

“I don’t want to talk to you,” she said, without looking at him. _Fucking men._

“Come on! I’m nice! Much nicer than that Mando you came in with. I’ll take care of you, ba-” he gripped her wrist under the poncho, and she looked down at his hand. 

“Remove that.”

“Come on, baby, pretty girl like you deserves to be treated nice.” He reached with his other to touch a braid that had flipped in front of her shoulder. She turned to look at him, and he stopped, uncertain, as she smirked dangerously.

“I warned you.” The shield erupted from her vambrace and he shrieked and pulled his hand away, smoking from the energy field. She turned off the shield and again turned her attention to the bartender. “I need three….”

“Bitch!” The Zabrak launched himself at her back. She whipped around, grabbed his arm with one hand, and pulled his own vibroblade from his belt with the other, and then pinned his wrist to the bar with the knife. 

The common room had gone silent. 

“I fucking warned you,” she hissed at him, then raised her voice at Karga, who’d come out of the back room to see what the commotion was about, “Do you like this one?”

“Not particularly.” Karga folded his arms and looked dispassionately at the pinned Zabrak. 

She grinned, flashing her teeth. “Good.” She turned on the vibration, twisted, and pulled the knife out, giving him a solid kick in the ribs as he slid to ground, clutching his bleeding appendage and howling in pain. 

She turned back to the bartender. “Three Soulean brandies. Bring them back there.” She looked down at the Zabrak. “Put it on his tab.” 

Cuan had charged out of the back room at the sound of the Zabrak shrieking, and pulled himself up short once he saw she had it well in hand. “I’m marrying that woman,” he marveled to himself, as she strutted past him, giving him a smug grin. 

Back in the room, once the brandies were delivered, and Karga was drinking one, and Teryn was sipping another, and Cara was rolling her glass back and forth, Karga shook his head. “What would have done if I said I liked him?”

“Not twisted the knife.”

Karga laughed out loud. “What should I call you?” 

Teryn’s eyes gleamed in a way that warned both Din and Cuan that she was in a mood. “Senaar’ika.” 

Cuan choked. Cara raised her eyebrow, and Din’s head tilted. 

“What a melodious name.” 

“ _You’re going to pay for that, LaarSenaar.”_ Cuan muttered privately into her comm. She didn’t look at him, but tilted her head in a way that absolutely said, _I’m counting on it._

Cara shook her head. “So I guess we’re going undercover.” 

Teryn grinned. “You’re in?”

“Yeah, I’m in. Sounds fun.” Cara cocked her head. “What kind of act did you have in mind?”

“The bazaar has clothes merchants, yeah? Let’s go shopping and see what we can find.” 

  
  
Cara and Teryn pawed through piles of used clothes. Cara held up a dress and Teryn wrinkled her nose. “It’s backless. And tawdry.” 

“We’re not going for tawdry?” Cara tossed it back. “Tawdry could work, but…” She and Teryn exchanged a look of distaste. That type of role was not one either of them wanted to play. 

Teryn shuddered. “No, I’m thinking factory owner…. Rich, gaudy, bright. Ostentatious. Obnoxious. Tasteless.” 

“Distracting.” Cara nodded. “Like a veracytl.”

“Exactly.” Teryn pulled out a rich acid green coat with color-changing gores sewn into it. The colors shifted from black to green with the light and movement. “Like this.”

“It’s the male veracytls that are the most obnoxious.” 

Teryn shrugged. “We’ll do our best.” 

In the end, they found the coat, several brightly colored scarves, extremely tight pants, and boots made out of some glowing animal skin. Cara decided that with Teryn being as bright and distracting as possible, she should go with all black. 

Teryn had also found some spools of ribbon in silver and dark red, and picked those up, too. Cara raised an eyebrow. “Not for this.” Teryn assured her. “Something else.” 

Karga picked up the coat and mused that it seemed like one he’d lost a while ago. Din and Cara eyed him with surprise. Cuan picked up the pants and looked askance at Teryn. She ignored him. 

Din cleared his throat. “So… what do you know about makeup?” Cara frowned, then nodded in agreement. The more ostentatious, the better, and not having some sort of plumage that matched the ridiculousness of the clothes would look odd. And the more distraction, the harder it would be for the traffickers to remember what either of them looked like. 

Teryn shrugged. “Very little. We’ll…. Need some, I suppose.” She shot Cuan a slightly uncertain glance, and he squeezed the back of her neck. “...do any of us know anyone who can help?”

Din nodded. “I do, actually. It’s a little out of our way, but…not a lot.” he looked at Karga. “How long will it take you to set it up?”

“A few days. I’ll message you.” 

“Where are we going?”

“Dantooine.” 

The trip to Dantooine was a long one -nearly 18 hours. Teryn and Cara talked over their cover stories. Teryn would pose as the owner of a spice factory that needed child laborers, with Cara as her bodyguard. They’d go in, and get as much a look around as possible, and then leave, saying they’d come back to make the exchange. 

“Simpler plans are better,” Cara said. “That way when they go wrong -and they will- you’re not stuck on a complicated path you can’t deviate from.” 

“Very Mandalorian.” Cuan had agreed. 

“We should see if we can find a ship to borrow- they might remember this one.” Din sighed, but Cara wasn’t wrong. The expenses they were racking up for this operation weren’t small. 

Teryn was practicing walking around in the boots and the pants. The range of movement in the pants was surprisingly decent, even if the ripple of every muscle in her legs could be seen. The boots had much higher and narrower heels that Teryn was accustomed to, and it was taking a lot of concentration to stay on her feet. None of these things were doing Cuan’s blood pressure any favors.

“I hate those pants.” He grumbled.

“You love them.” She grinned at him. 

Cara watched all of this with delight. 

“After this is over, you should come back with us.” 

“Why?”

“Well,” Teryn stumbled on the heels and fell into Cuan. “We’re uh… getting married, so… there’s a celebration... Cake, I’m told.” 

“What my cyare is asking is, ‘Would you like to come to the wedding?’” Cuan settled Teryn on his lap, laughing. 

“You don’t have to, I just thought…maybe....” Teryn waved her hand to dismiss the idea, and Cuan brought it down. 

Cara grinned. “I’d love to.” 

Din came down from the cockpit, and Cara jerked her head at the weapons locker in a question. He rolled his eyes and sighed. “Don’t you have enough of my weapons that you never return?” 

“Can always use one more.” Cara opened it and started to rummage while Din tried very hard not to bristle at her messing with his careful organization. “What happened to the kid you picked up?”

Teryn grinned. “In family tradition, she’s going to his sister to raise.” 

“Married and adopting a kid? All at once?” 

Teryn looked at Cuan and put her hand on his helmet. “I have some living to catch up on.” He rumbled in agreement. She smiled at him before looking up at Din. “Who the hell do you know on Dantooine?”

Iruz’zake was mildly surprised and rather relieved to see Din enter her massage parlor. The twi’lek hadn’t seen him since she’d helped him learn how to maintain the small green child’s claws ages ago… more than a year. She’d learned that he would show up when he showed up, but she had been half-expecting him for months. 

She hadn’t wanted to admit that she was worried, but she’d been a little worried. Especially since the reports had come that Ran had gotten himself blown up by the New Republic. 

“Zake.” The Mandalorian gave her a nod. She thought it as a _warm_ nod, but… to be honest, it was hard to tell. 

“Mando. And guests?” She nodded graciously at the three people in ponchos and hoods who crowded in behind Din. This was unusual. Besides the baby, he’d never come with another person, much less three. 

“We need some help, Zake.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, the pinning the wrist with a knife thing is another Oberyn Martell homage. I regret nothing. Don't harass women. 
> 
> Iruz'zake made her first appearance in Baby Claws, which was not originally part of this universe, but hey. https://archiveofourown.org/works/24483730
> 
> Mando's Translations
> 
> ba’vodu’ad: Cousin (parent's sibling's child)  
> gai bal manda: adoption ceremony, lit. name and soul  
> Kurs’khaded: Wolf  
> aruetii: Outsider  
> Ori’vod: Older sibling  
> shu’shuke: Disasters  
> cyar’ika: sweetheart  
> Senaar’ika: Little Bird (in the optional smut, this is a name Cuan uses for Teryn in specific circumstances. She's getting him riled up on purpose.)  
> cyare: Beloved


	28. I cannot let them see the scars that keep them safe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How to be useful in a crisis when the government isn't doing anything to help.

Jha’iil woke up and was disoriented at first. This was not his room, and it was not the room he used when he stayed with his beloved ba’vodu. He was in his crib, with his blankets, and almost all of his stuffies, but this was not his room. 

Atin was curled up at the foot of the crib, awake, and watchful, and started purring as soon as he saw that Jha’iil was awake. Jha’iil frowned to himself, crawling over to Atin and curling his claws into the cat’s ginger fur. Right. His buir and his ba’vodu and Kursh had all left, to rescue other children. He and Atin were staying with H’lava and Ionnas. 

He curled up next to Atin and let himself be sad. His people had explained that it was important that they go, and it was equally important that he stay. But that didn’t mean he had to like it. 

He listlessly picked at his breakfast, and sat in the corner of the creche and was sad. Later that afternoon, H’lava took him to Tuathal. 

“Oh, verd’ika.” Tuathal sat Jha’iil in his lap. “You’re not having a good day, are you?”

“No.”

“You miss your aliit?”

“Yeah.” 

“That’s understandable. I miss them, too.” 

Jha’iil sighed, much like his buir, and leaned against Tuathal’s chest. The old man’s heartbeat was comforting, if a little fluttery. 

“I understand that you’re going to have a ba’vodu’ad.” 

Jha’iil nodded. That could be fun. He wasn’t entirely sure if he would like sharing his buir with another Foundling, but a cousin sounded okay. He knew that his ba’vodu would be a good buir. And Lypatri needed a good buir. 

Before bedtime, H’lava took him to Rima’s office where, as promised, there was a message. It was short, and his buir just said that everything was okay, Karga said hello, and that there might be a surprise for him when they got back. 

Jha’iil perked up his ears. Surprises were often good, these days.

Lypatri, for her part, tried not to worry. All of her experiences, up to this point, with adults weren’t good. No one, certainly no adult, had ever had her best interests at heart, except for one young man who said he was from the New Republic Child Protective Services, and had come by for a few weeks with food and taught some of the kids Lypatri ran with to read.

Her father had found the young man one day, and he never came around again. 

So when the Mandalorian had taken her, she figured it was more of the same, until the al’baar’ur had told her she could be a kid and would be safe and had given her a name. And she and Cuan had said they would be her parents. 

And then they left. Sure, they’d said goodbye, and promised they’d be back as soon as they could, but it was hard to believe that anyone would come back for her. 

She hoped they would. But hope, in her experience, was a dangerous thing. 

That experience didn’t keep her from looking up at the sky a lot, though. 

Zake sat back. “So that’s what’s been going on.”

“Have there been kids disappearing from Dantooine, too?” Teryn asked. She was deeply curious as to who this woman was, how Din knew her, and precisely what their relationship was. She wasn’t going to be so rude as to ask, though. 

Not _yet._

“As soon as it became clear there was a problem- which took longer than it should have- and that it was also clear that the New Republic government wasn’t going to do shit about it,” Zake rolled her eyes and her lekku twitched in irritation, “locals organized themselves.” 

Din made a sound of disgust. Of course the New Republic government was useless. “Let me guess, they’re ‘looking into it’?” 

Zake’s scoff was bitter enough to make a cocktail with. “I think it’s on the list of things they’re looking into, but enough people have said that it’s not a real problem. Either fewer street kids is a good thing, or the reports are fake, and there isn’t any problem at all. So it keeps getting moved down the list.” She and Din exchanged a look of mutual disdain. 

Teryn and Cara glanced at each other. _Are you seeing this?_

“Anyway, locals organized. They set up shelters with guards- a bunch of kids were getting snatched from where they were sleeping. The kids even organized themselves into gangs for protection. I’m not sure that it’s ultimately a good thing, but after a few messy fights, it appears they’ve left us alone. Easier prey elsewhere, I’m sure.” Zake sighed. 

“We’re going to put a stop to it.” Din said, quiet but firm. 

“At least this arm of it,” Teryn added, giving Din a sharp look. “I don’t know, based on what the kid told us, if this is big enough to explain all of the missing children.”

Zake nodded. The woman who hadn’t given her name was intriguing. Cara Dune made sense- he’d mentioned the former shock trooper before. The other Mandalorian warrior, well that was a surprise, but not incomprehensible. The woman though, there were things there that didn’t add up. She treated Mando with a familiarity that implied a long standing relationship, but what kind? 

Anyone who looked at the woman and the Mandalorian in the red armor could see they were together- even without a look or a touch, they clearly _fit._ Who was she to Zake’s Mandalorian? 

So many questions. 

“What will happen to the children you find? Will they all become Mandalorians?”

Cuan answered. “Some will, most likely. We’ll try to see if any of them have living relatives or if there are other... appropriate placements. It was easier before, but now…” he shrugged. “Not everyone is willing to talk to us.” 

Zake nodded. “If you find any twi’leks, I have some connections.” Cuan nodded back. 

Zake had ordered food almost before the door had closed behind them, and once it arrived, she took Din to one of her back rooms so he could eat in privacy. He appreciated the consideration, and she thought it was a small enough way to express her gratitude.

She turned to leave, and he stopped her with a light touch on her arm. 

“Something you should be aware of….” He shifted uncomfortably. Zake nodded kindly. Din sighed. “I don’t know the entire story, but my vod’ika can’t bear to have anyone touch her face. She won’t like me telling you, but…” 

He didn’t relish the idea of discussing Teryn’s business, in fact he hated it, but he knew that Zake was trustworthy. He had trusted her with a lot, and they were about to trust her with more. 

And knowing his vod’ika as he did, he knew that she would try to tough it out, to the detriment of the mission and to the detriment of her own well-being. He could already tell that she was trying to steel herself to tolerate it, had been since he mentioned the need for makeup, but… 

If there was a way to avoid it, he’d like to find it. And Zake was likely to know something that might help. 

Zake blinked, and then blinked again. “...ah. Vod’ika, that means… something like, younger sibling?” 

After a pause, Din nodded. 

“I didn’t know you had family.” She said it mildly, but there was a slight note of reproof.

“It’s complicated.” Last time he saw Zake, it was before he knew the truth about what had happened to Teryn. Before a lot of things. “It turns out I have a lot more family than I expected.” 

“The baby?”

“My son, now.” Din couldn’t keep the warmth from his voice, not from her.

Zake gave him a smile that somehow managed to say _congratulations_ and _I knew it_ all at once. “I’ll send you back with some paints for him.” 

He nodded in thanks. “Anyway, something happened… she can’t…” Din shook his head. “She won’t say.” 

“Have you _asked_ her?”

“Yes!” Din snapped then pulled himself short. “...well…” Had he? Or had he just gotten angry that she wouldn’t tell him? 

“Hm.” Zake tapped a finger on her lips as she thought. “I might have an idea. How many credits do you have?”

“A lot.” Cara shook her head in disbelief. “Karga’s come through. The meet is set for the day after tomorrow, and…” she laughed. “He told me to check my credit balance. He put in an extra 10,000. ‘Bankrolling’ he said.” 

Teryn glanced at Din, frowning. This didn’t sound like the Karga he’d told her about. Din shrugged slightly. People did have the capacity to surprise you. 

Zake smiled. “Perfect. I’ll need about a thousand for what I’m thinking, but you should be able to get back about at least half of that.” She gave Din a cheeky grin. “Unless you break it.” 

“Break what?” 

Zake had closed up her shop, and told them all to get some rest while she got what she needed. Cara had, true to what she’d expect from a former shock trooper, gone to sleep immediately, with a slight tension that told the world (if they knew what to look for) that she could and would wake up instantly. 

Din had, with a quiet word to Teryn and Cuan, gone to a private room to sleep. Cuan would stay awake, keeping watch, and allow Din some time to have his helmet off- once things got going, there was no telling how long it would be before he’d get another chance. 

When Zake returned, she could see that the other Mandalorian was awake, and quietly holding the woman- her Mando’s vod’ika- to his chest. He’d taken off a glove and was allowing her hair to play through his fingers, and she was curled into his chest, awake and staring and worried. It was clear that he knew she was awake, and that the only thing to do was to keep her close and let her be. 

Well, Zake could understand that. And envy it. 

He looked up when she entered, and gave her a nod. The woman pulled out of her reverie and also gave her a wary nod, but didn’t relax until he tightened his arm around her and said something quietly. She nodded, and sat up. 

“Did you find… whatever it is you were looking for?”

Zake smiled. “I did. Do you want to get more rest, or take a look at what I’ve got now?”

She watched a series of emotions flicker across the woman’s face; curiosity, trepidation, a bit of excitement, and then, finally, uncertainty as she looked back at the other Mando. He gave a nod and touched the back of her neck, and she closed her eyes. Finally she nodded at Zake. “Let’s take a look at it now.” 

They went into another room- Cara was still asleep and Zake had asked the woman if she wanted privacy. After the briefest hesitation, she had nodded. Zake pulled out a thin, transparent mask. “I’m sorry, I don’t know what to call you.”

The woman eyed her for a minute, taking her measure. “He trusts you.”

Zake gave an eloquent shrug. “He seems to.” 

The woman nodded, frowning again, considering. “Senaar. You can call me Senaar.” 

Zake nodded. “It’s nice to meet you, Senaar.” She knew full well that wasn’t the woman’s name, but it was something. She still didn’t have any sort of name for her Mando, but up until this point, Mando had worked just fine. “He… he mentioned that there was some difficulty with…” She smiled kindly as Teryn’s face suddenly closed off. “He said you didn’t like having your face touched.” 

“....oh.” Teryn felt another series of emotions ripple through her. Shame at Din knowing this was as big a problem as it was. Relief that he thought to mention it, and that Zake seemed to have an idea of how to deal with it. Worry that Din thought she was too weak to handle the mission. Worry that Din knew more than she’d told him. 

But mostly a lot of shame.

“Anyway, I remembered a trick that some dancers use when they have quick changes that involve changing their makeup… they use these masks.” Zake held it up. “It should be light enough.” 

Teryn took it. It was light. And flexible. It might work. 

“Put it on. It’ll mold to your face, and then we can take it off and color it.” 

Teryn stared down at the mask, then said, without looking up, “He told you.” 

“He was concerned.” Zake smiled lightly. “He said he knew he didn’t have the full story, but he knew it was an issue.” 

Teryn hummed quietly. Of course Din had noticed. He noticed everything. It’s what made him the best bounty hunter in the parsec. 

That didn’t mean she _liked_ the idea of him noticing. 

“Why don’t you put on what you’ll be wearing? Then we can make sure it works the way you need it to.” Zake also gestured at Teryn’s long braids. “And see what we can do with this.” 

Teryn nodded briefly, and went to get the coat and the pants Cuan liked (but claimed to loathe). He looked up and tilted his head inquiringly. “You good?”

“Yeah, it’s fine. She has an idea.” She shrugged. “It might work.” Back in the room, Zake had left and Teryn struggled into the pants before turning her attention to draping the scarves to create some form of a top. There was a knock, and she called, “Wait…” but the door was opening before she could fully turn her bare back away from the door. 

Zake couldn’t completely stifle her gasp. The scars were… extensive. She’d rarely seen anything quite so meticulously brutal. “I’m sorry…” 

Teryn backed up into the wall and stared at her with wide eyes and grey lips. Of the people who’d ever seen the extent of the scars, all but one was dead, and he was in the other room. Not even Tabor had seen them all after she killed Rokr. And this woman… suddenly saw everything. At least with Cuan, it had been her choice to show him. 

“I’m so sorry, I should have waited…” Zake tilted her head in apology. “I’ll come back.” She shut the door behind her, and leaned against the wall. A few more pieces had fallen into place. Just a few, but she knew something about scars that you wanted to keep hidden from the world. She touched the headscarf she wore over her lekku. Yes, she knew quite a bit about those. 

Teryn sat down, trembling. This had seemed like a good idea at the time, and was now getting to be an awful lot. And of course this Zake would go and tell Din exactly what she’d seen, which was exactly what Teryn didn’t want. It was bad enough to have one trauma bared for the galaxy to see, even if most of them didn’t know what they were looking at. And bad enough for her ori’vod to know the shape another had left behind. She didn’t want him, or anyone else, to know precisely the form of a third. They’d never see anything else. 

She fussed with the scarves, then frowned at her armor. She’d worn it every day since the Armorer had given her permission. To not wear any of it seemed wrong. Almost sacrilegious. She sorted through the pieces, but none of them worked with the image they needed her to project. 

Except…

She pulled the mythosaur amulet out of her belt pouch. That would count as wearing armor, sort of, wouldn’t it? And could be hidden? 

“ _There are many Ways, ad’ika, but they all go the same direction.”_

She nodded to herself. The amulet would count.

There was a knock at the door, and this time Zake waited until Teryn called her in. “I’m sorry about that.” She frowned at the scarves. “...may I?” Zake stepped forward and Teryn faded back, eyes still wide, every hair on her arms and the back of her neck standing up. Zake paused, stepped back, and held up her hands. “I should have waited. We don’t have to mention it.” She tilted her head as Teryn’s eyes flicked to the door and back. “I didn’t tell him. And I won’t.” 

After another pause, Teryn nodded, and held herself very still while Zake rearranged the scarves so they artfully revealed nothing and implied everything. Then the coat over that and Zake nodded, satisfied. “That’s just… appalling. It’s perfect.”

“Thanks.” Teryn eyed her warily, and held out her hand for the mask. Zake handed it to her. “Just… press it on?” 

“Yes. It’ll mold to your face when it warms up, and then we pull it off and it’ll harden in the shape.” Zake watched as Teryn quietly pressed it onto her face, noting the tension in her jaw. “How does it feel?” 

Teryn worked her face around. She could tell something was there, but it wasn’t heavy or awkward, and it didn’t feel like she was being touched. This might work. She nodded. 

“Take it off. Then I’ll get to work.” Zake’s eyes lit up. She didn’t get to do full face very often, and this promised to be truly ridiculous. It would be fun.

Teryn handed her the mask and Zake pulled out her brushes and colors, and stared at Teryn’s face with a disconcerting intensity. Teryn shifted uncomfortably. No one ever stared at her quite that much, and it was just weird. “How… how did you learn to do this?”

Zake selected a brush and began to apply stripes above the eyes. “In a previous life I was a dancer for a criminal overlord. Had to know how to do makeup, costumes. I’ve learned a bit with hair, but…” She shrugged , rolling her eyes back at lekku. “I was injured… couldn’t dance anymore. But I’d learned massage, so. I was still….useful.” 

Teryn nodded. She knew about being useful. “How did you end up here?”

“Your brother.” Zake smiled as she switched to another brush. Teryn looked at her sharply. “Yes, he told me… he told me you’re his younger sister. He’d never mentioned family before, but he never talks about himself.” 

“Safer that way,” Teryn murmured. 

“Mmmm. Anyway, my…. _Employer_ was one of his bounties, and instead of letting me go on to the next employer-” the sneer in Zake’s voice made it clear what kind of employer that would have been, “We faked my death and I ended up here.” 

“And he’s been here somewhat regularly.”

“Well, he likes foot massages.” 

Teryn looked so appalled at knowing that information that Zake had to put the brush down to laugh. “He _does_ like them, but has only accepted once.” 

“I still didn’t need to know that.” 

Zake shot her such a mischievous grin that Teryn couldn’t help but hesitantly smile back. Zake continued to work on the mask, having Teryn put it on a few times to check her placement. “I can tell he is worried about you.” 

“I’m fine.” The answer was so quick, so glib, so automatic. 

“Mmmm. We all have scars we hide, even from the ones we love the most.” 

Teryn sat back and eyed Zake speculatively. “Is that why you wear the headscarf?”

Zake sat back for her part and met Teryn’s eyes with a solid respect. Unsettled or not, she didn’t miss much. “One of the reasons.” 

  
  


Din woke up after several hours feeling more refreshed than he had in a while when not with the Covert. Knowing that Cuan was on watch with Cara and Teryn as backup allowed him to relax, and Zake would never walk in on him without an invitation. 

He sighed a little, then wondered why. 

Once he got armored up, he went out into the front room. Cara was browsing through the holonet, looking at listings for ships to rent. Teryn was curled up, asleep, her head on Cuan’s thigh. He’d cushioned the thigh armor with his cape, and had a hand on her head, and even through the helmet, he could tell that the man was looking down at her tenderly.

And for just a moment, Din felt an intense pang of…. Envy. 

He knew that he was valued by the Tribe, respected by them, maybe even liked by them. He knew very well that Jha’iil loved him, and he loved his kid more than anything. And he knew that Teryn loved him, even despite….everything. He couldn’t have truly blamed her if she had washed her hands of him, but improbably, she hadn’t. Cara loved him in her way, as a comrade in arms. 

But he’d never had a _partner_. Sure there had been liaisons, the occasional convenient meeting, but nothing like what he saw before him. That had been fine, acceptable. His life was chaotic at best. Hardly something that was conducive to any sort of relationship. 

And yet. 

He nodded at Cuan, and asked, through the private comm channel, “She asleep?”

Cuan nodded. “Actually asleep, yes.” It had taken a while, and she’d been awake worrying about something -something new- but hadn’t wanted to talk. There was a limpness she had when she was asleep that wasn’t there when she was feigning. It had taken him a little time to recognize it, but now it was easy. He knew she feigned sleep so he wouldn’t worry, but now that he could recognize when she was faking, he found that he worried less. He knew if she was sleeping or not, which was better than wondering. And despite the nightmares, she _was_ sleeping better. At least with him. 

“Vor entye. I needed the rest.” 

“A family trait.” Cuan’s fingers traced Teryn’s hairline. 

Din paused, but the man wasn’t wrong. “You should get some rest.”

Cuan nodded in agreement and shook Teryn lightly. “Cyar’ika.” She grumbled and he laughed a little. “LaarSenaar, wake up.” 

“Nayc.” 

With an amused shake of his head, Cuan carefully pulled his leg from under her head, stood up, and stretched. Then he picked Teryn up and nodded down the hall Din came from. “That way?” 

Din nodded, and watched as Cuan carried her down to the room he’d just vacated. He couldn’t blame him- once Cara and Teryn left, they would be functionally without contact until the job was done. 

He’d want the same thing, if he had it. 

Cara watched them go with raised eyebrows, then held up the datapad. “Found one.” 

“Can we afford it?”

“For a few days? Sure. Probably going to wreck it, though.” Cara grinned.

Zake came in with breakfast, and at the sight of her smile- more open, less stark relief than it had been when they arrived, Din felt something in him shift. Relax a little.

Huh.

Zake looked around. “Where are the others?”

“...I sent them back to sleep.” 

Zake twitched an eyebrow. “Breakfast will keep for them.” She handed Din a cup of caff and a wrapped sandwich. “Back office is open. Don’t touch anything.” Din nodded in thanks and left. Cara grinned at his back. 

“This is a twist,” she said, as she took the breakfast Zake handed her.

“What?” 

Cara shook her head. Din had used Iraz’zake’s name. Twice. She’d never heard him use anyone’s name before, not even her own. And the speed at which the twi’lek woman was willing to upend her entire day, well. 

If they hadn’t figured it out yet, no reason to push anything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh. I know a bunch of people claim they saw this coming with the Baby Claws one-shot. I, for one, DID NOT. 
> 
> Mando'a Translations
> 
> buir: praent  
> ba'vodu: Parent's sibling  
> Kursh: Short for Kurs'khaded, Jha'iil's name for Cuan  
> verd'ika: Little soldier  
> aliit: Family, clan  
> ba'vodu'ad: Cousin (parent's sibling's child)  
> al'baar'ur: Doctor  
> vod'ika: Younger sibling  
> ori'vod: Older sibling  
> Senaar: Bird  
> ad'ika: Little one


	29. I've got fire in my soul

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cousins gonna cousin, and final preparations are made.

Waking up in Cuan’s arms had become such a familiar feeling. Teryn had told him that what she wanted was _yaim_ , what she wanted was home, and improbably, impossibly, she’d found it, and it wasn’t a place. It wasn’t even just him, though so much of it was. His Tribe had, for the most part, welcomed her, given her a place, and allowed her to find her way out of shadows.

She hadn’t realized how dark those shadows had been until there was sun.

She gave herself a few moments to enjoy the safety of being with him, because soon, soon she and Cara would set off and then things would get interesting. She raised herself up on her elbow and ran her fingers down his face to wake him up. He twitched his nose, opened his eyes, and smiled.

“Mesh’la.”

“Ner ruus.” 

He kissed under her ear, then tucked her under his chin. “Are you ready?”

She nodded. 

“I wish I was going with you.”

“I do, too. But it’ll be fine.” 

“You can do anything, cyare.” He buried his fingers into her hair at the back of her skull. “You’ve got this.” 

“Yeah, I do.” She raised herself up again to look at him. “You have a mission. You need to find out what is going on between…” She narrowed her eyes meaningfully. 

He laughed, out loud. “Your ori’vod isn’t the most forthcoming person, LaarSenaar, but I’ll see what I can do.” 

  
  


True to form, the first thing Lypatri had asked Atriu was if she knew how to make bombs. 

True to form, Atriu had said yes, she did. And, seeing Lypatri’s eyes light up, she offered to show her how. Lypatri immediately agreed. Finally, someone who was reasonable! After dinner, the two girls snuck through the woods, Atriu occasionally stopping to show Lypatri how better to sneak. Lypatri was already pretty good, Atriu admitted, but sneaking through woods was a whole new skill set. 

“You’re gonna go rescue the other kids?”

“Yeah. It’s my first operation.”

“Wow.” They went a good distance into the woods. Finally, they came to a clearing with a huge rock pile emerging from the ground. Atriu nodded. They’d be able to set off a small explosive and not set anything on fire. While fire was fun, it wouldn’t be a good idea. Lypatri peered with naked curiosity at the bag Atriu had over her shoulder. 

“Okay, so this is for a basic bomb… mostly we use charges, but you gotta know how to build ‘em. That way you understand how they work.” 

“They just have this stuff?” Lypatri reached out to touch the grey clay like material. Atriu smacked her hand away. 

“The explosives are kept locked up, but I’m a verd now. And this is old, they won’t miss it.” 

Lypatri nodded. That made sense. Atriu showed her how to set the timer, and insert the detonator, and put the whole bomb on a rock. “Now do we hide?”

“Now we hide.” They ran for cover behind a fallen tree, and peeped out to watch the explosion. 

It was… large. Much bigger than Atriu had expected, and they found themselves bowled over backwards from the blast. Lypatri looked up as debris fell from the sky, eyebrows smoking. “...whoa. That was _awesome_.” 

Atriu stared at the crater, the still falling rubble, and the trees that had been knocked down from the blast. “We need to run.” 

“Why?”

“That was too big.” Atriu grabbed Lypatri’s hand and started to run back towards the compound. “They’ll have seen that.” The amount of explosive she had taken should have been enough to make a small explosion, not blown the entire rock formation apart.

Lypatri struggled to keep up. She was good at running, but Atriu had been in training her whole life, and her legs were longer. “Are we in trouble?”

“We’re gonna be.” Atriu found herself pulled to a stop as Lypatri froze in her tracks. “What?”

“Are they gonna send me away?” Her voice was so quiet. 

“No! We’re just gonna….” Atriu looked up as the sentries flew over them to the crater, then back to Lypatri, and put both hands on her shoulders. “They’re not going to send you away. I won’t let them.” 

Lypatri’s lip started to wobble, and one of the sentries landed in front of them. “I assume you had something to do with that?”

“Yes, ruus’alor.” Atriu held herself up straight. No point in trying to hide this. Not when the crater was still smoking. 

“Mmm. Where’d you get the explosives?” 

“The back storage room in the armory.” 

The ruus’alor looked down at Lypatri. “And you, verd’ika?”

Lypatri started to cry in earnest. “I just wanted… I asked… I wanted to blow something up.” She started to hiccup. “Please don’t tell the al’baar’ur. She won’t want me.” 

The ruus’alor sighed. Everyone already knew that Lypatri was looking forward to explosives training with a laser sharp focus. She’d made that quite clear to _everyone_. They hadn’t expected that the newest verd would be the one to show her, though.

In retrospect, maybe they should have. 

“Come on back, verd’ika. Alor is gonna want to talk to you, but I don’t think you need to worry about your buire- either of them.” The ruus’alor tilted their helmeted head in a smile. “Tadasco told us all about how you already had Mandokar.” 

There were a lot of things to get done before they moved on to Ord Mantell. Cara went to secure the ship, and make sure it was one she could fly. Din and Cuan went to let the Tribes know what the timing was. 

Teryn worked on walking in the boots and was starting to get frustrated with how awkward she felt. Zake watched for a while, then cleared her throat. “If I may… you were raised Mandalorian, yes?”

Teryn stopped, wobbling slightly, and eyed Zake warily before nodding. 

“You move like someone who was trained to fight.” Zake gestured to her stomach. “Your weight is centered here, which is good for fighting, not so good for those.” She pointed to the boots. “And what you are doing is putting your weight on your feet in such a way so you’ll be able to slide in close if you need too, and instinctively keeping your weight on your toes.”

“....and?”

Zake smiled. “Try supporting your core, holding yourself up higher, and leading from here.” She tapped Teryn on the upper chest. “Heel down first, then roll on to the ball of your foot.” 

Teryn nodded, and carefully thought about her core muscles, drawing in her diaphragm and bringing her shoulders down and felt her spine lengthen. It felt weird- she didn’t feel like she would have the power to give a solid blow from this posture, but she could already feel how it worked better with the higher heels. She took a step, putting the heel down first as Zake had suggested, and smiled. It already felt more stable. 

Zake nodded. “Good.” 

They worked for a while, Zake suggesting minute changes in posture and movement. “Fighting and dancing are not so different.” 

Teryn could see that. It was all a matter of how you moved your body, being in tune with the movements, and which muscles were needed to create the shape you wanted. Having someone who knew which shapes were needed was immensely helpful. 

“How did you learn all this?”

Zake hummed. “There are few paths for enslaved twi’lek girls. I got lucky.” 

Teyrn nodded. She suspected as much.

“If I may ask….” Zake tilted her head, “and please do not answer if you don’t want to, but… if you were raised a Mandalorian, why do you not have a helmet?”

Teryn sat down. “It was stolen from me.” Zake gave a quiet nod. “We believe that if you remove your helmet in the presence of another, or if it’s taken, then... Your right to wear it, the right to call yourself a Mandalorian is forfeit. So….” she shrugged. _And as a result I probably have no soul, but we don’t need to get into that._

“I’m sorry.”

Teryn shrugged again. “It’s what we believe.” 

Once Zake was satisfied with Teryn’s walk, she sat her down and began to fuss with her hair. “This is lovely. I never thought about Mandalorians having hair.”

“Normally people keep it short.” Teryn said, slightly sharper than she intended. “Easier under a helmet.” 

“Ah.” Zake arranged it into a high, twisted snake shape down the back of Teryn’s head. The height would make it harder to guess how tall Teryn truly was, and would assist in drawing attention away from any feature that could be used to identify her. Between the clothes, the mask, and the hair, anyone would be hard pressed to give any sort of useful description.

“I feel like you’ve done things like this before.” 

“One learns things. One finds ways to put them into practice.” Zake opened a box with two twisted narrow metal sticks, pointed on one end, and with a swirling design on the other. She handed Teryn one and carefully put the other in her hair. Teryn touched the point. 

“Sharp.” She glanced up at Zake, who held her hand out for it, and slid it in near the other one. The pressure of the twisted hair would hold them in place. Zake nodded, satisfied.

“That will do.” 

Teryn wobbled her head around, shaking it from side to side, checking to make sure everything was stable, and nodded back. Zake picked up a small jar of salve and looked at it, frowning in thought. 

“I know I said I wouldn’t mention them, but….” she sighed and gestured slightly to indicate Teryn’s back. “If they itch, this will help.” 

Teryn’s face went completely blank, which Zake found _unsettling_. The woman clearly hadn’t ever been in the habit of controlling her expression much, even when she tried, and seeing this complete shutdown was...eerie. “They’re old.” 

Zake inclined her head, but wasn’t entirely surprised when she took the jar, anyway. Old scars, especially scars as deep as those, could still use some care. The idea that Teryn had just been tolerating any discomfort didn’t surprise Zake in the least. Teryn sniffed it cautiously, and then tucked it in with her armor.

Cara returned. She’d gotten a ship that was flashy enough, and an astromech droid that seemed reliable. She and Teryn had exchanged a look agreeing to not mention the droid to Din. Cara got dressed in her black bodyguard outfit, and with a smile, Zake covered over the Rebel insignia tattoo on her face. 

They got Teryn fully dressed in the costume, but held off on the mask. When Din and Cuan came back, Taryn was working on her walk again, and the sound Cuan made was both disapproving and approving all at once.

She grinned at him. “Now I’m really glad you’re not going. You’d never be any good at spotting threats.”

“The only threat I see is to my self-control.” He eyed the hairstyle. “That’s…. Tall.” Between the boots and the hair, she was now taller than him. “....I think I like my tall woman.” 

“I was always tall.” 

“I like it.” He frowned down at the scarves covering her torso. “No armor?”

“Doesn’t go. And we don’t want to show our hand.” She pulled a long cord that went around her neck and hung down beneath the scarves, and the mythosaur amulet was at the end of it. “I have this. It’ll stay hidden, and it’s not much, but… I won’t be without beskar.” 

He nodded. It was something. “Weapons?”

She nodded her head at Cara. “That’s what she’s for. We’ll be fine.” She carefully put on the mask, and looked at Zake for confirmation. Zake nodded, it was garish, and tasteless, and perfect. 

“Do you want to have your armor, or should we take it?” Din asked. He was resolutely not looking at the costume, or paying attention to this display of embarrassing affection. But he couldn’t keep himself from smiling at the look of obvious pride on Zake’s face. 

She’d done a good job. 

Teryn frowned down at her armor, neatly packed and waiting to go. “I think you should take it. If they search the ship for any reason, it’ll raise questions.” 

Din nodded. That made sense. “The other ships will meet us outside the city in the morning. As soon as you get out, you get there and give your report, then we’ll go from there.”

Teryn nodded. “You’ll send us the coordinates?”

“She’ll have them.” Din nodded at Cara. “You need anything else?”

Teryn and Cara looked at each other. Cara shook her head. “No, I got everything I need from your weapons locker.”

Zake laughed. “I like her.” 

Din glared at Zake, betrayal written all over his helm. She grinned at him, and Teryn and Cara exchanged another amused look. Din shook his head and turned to Teryn. “Watch your face.” 

She gave him a smile that was supposed to be reassuring, but the undercurrent of anxiety was clear to Din, even through the mask. She nodded. “I know.”

“Everything you think is there. Control it.” 

“I know.”

“Because you’re not good at it-”

“I KNOW.” She glared at him, folding her arms and squaring her jaw. “What am I thinking right now?” 

Din huffed in annoyance.

Cara sidled over to Cuan. “You think this was what it was like when they were growing up?”

“I think this is exactly what is was like.” He laughed quietly, sadly. “My vod’ika and I were the same.”

Teryn turned her attention to Cuan, and he let his hands rest on her shoulders. “K’oyacyi, cyare.” 

She nodded, and slid on hand up to cup his jaw beneath his helmet. “I will. It’ll be quick. In and out.” she ducked her head so he could rest his forehead on the top of her head. He moved his thumb to brush just under her ear. 

“In and out. Gar kar’taylir darasuum, ner LaarSenaar.” He whispered. “Save the boots, if you can.”

“Gar kar’taylir darasuum,” she murmured back, then smirked. “I knew you liked them.” 

She stepped back and tossed her head slightly, and her entire posture changed. Her ribs went up, shoulders went down and back, and her face rearranged itself into a bored hauteur. She tossed a look at Cara. “We go.” She swept out of the door onto the street, not waiting to see if Cara was behind her. 

Din handed Cara a communicator. “Let us know when you’re on your way back. She can give you the codeword.” Cara nodded. 

“Dune…” Cuan said, soft, tense. “Please..”

Cara gave him a reassuring smile. “I’m on it. Don’t worry.” She vanished out into the night, bristling with weapons and purpose. 

Lypatri and Atriu waited by the Samaki forge. Atriu stood at attention. She was in trouble, and she knew it. Somehow, the bomb had been a lot more powerful than she had expected, and there was no hiding from what they had done. Best thing to do was to face it head on and hope the punishment wasn’t too bad. 

Lypatri cowered in her seat. Atriu didn’t think that she’d be sent away, and the ruus’alor didn’t think she’d be sent away, but she was terrified that Rima would overrule them, and worse, the al’baar’ur was going to decide that she was too much trouble and not adopt her, and no one would want her. Not ever. 

No one ever had wanted her. She tried not to cry, but tears kept leaking out of her eyes and there was an occasional sniffle. 

The ruus’alor came out of Rima’s office and jerked their head at Atriu. “Your turn.” Atriu glanced down at the miserable Lypatri. The ruus’alor’s voice softened. “I’ll stay here with her. She’ll be fine.” 

Atriu straightened up her spine and walked into Rima’s office, where Rima and Sadet were waiting. If Sadet was there, this was serious. “Alor.”

“What are we going to do with you, Atriu Tadasco.” Rima shook her head. Her helmet was on her desk- for the most part, she kept it off at home, even when distributing discipline.

“If I may,” Atriu started, and at Rima’s nod, she plunged on. “My ba’vodu and his… um. His… the al’baar’ur… they asked me to keep an eye on the new Foundling and show her around until we left. And I knew that if someone didn’t show her how to make an explosive, she would try to make one on her own.”

Rima’s mouth twitched. “So you decided to take matters into your own hands.”

“Well, no one else was.” 

“I am tempted to keep you home from the operation. Very tempted.” Rima held Atriu’s gaze for a long minute. “It has been pointed out that you will be helpful with dealing with scared children, so I am not going to keep you home. But you will be kept on a short leash until and during. Is that understood?”

“Yes, alor.” 

Rima sighed, sadly. She’d heard that exact same tone from Arkil and Cuan countless times. Atriu was truly a Tadasco- impulsive, hard to control but easy to point at a problem. Heart (almost) always in the right spot. And once a Tadasco decided someone was aliit, they were ride or die for them. 

Atriu had clearly decided the new Foundling was her responsibility. 

“Thank you, alor.” Atriu turned to go, and then turned back. “She’s scared that I got her into so much trouble that you’ll send her away.” 

“We would never do that.” Rima tilted her head. “You are confined to quarters when you are not preparing to go, or having meals with you ba’buir and ba’vodu’ad. I know it’s not official yet, but that’s what she is. She needs people to look out for her.” she smiled. “I know you know that.” 

“Yes, alor.”

“Dismissed.” 

Atriu left, feeling exceptionally lucky. It would have been extremely fair for Rima to ground her from the mission. All she was trying to do was make Lypatri feel better, and well, she’d fucked up. 

_“Doing the wrong thing for the right reason isn’t always great, ad’ika. But if you must, try not to get caught, hm?”_

“Sorry, Bu. We got caught.” 

That said, the grin on Lypatri’s face was pretty great. 

Rima stepped out of her office, and looked down at the miserable Lypatri. “What is it that they called you? Kurs’ika?”

Lypatri nodded, staring down at her hands, giant tears dropping down. “Are you going to send me away? They said you’re not. But you’re in charge and you can do whatever you want.”

“I am not sending you away.” Rima sat down next to her, and nodded a dismissal of the ruus’alor. “I know you’re excited to learn new things.”

“I just wanted….”

“I know ad’ika.” Rima put an arm around the girl. “I also know you’re worried.”

“What if they decide I’m too much trouble?” Lypatri wailed.

“I’ve known Cuan a very long time. And he is already so proud of you for trying to charge him with a training knife- he told everyone. He’ll think this is hilarious. But,” Rima held up a finger. “Only because you didn’t get hurt. The fact that you have no eyebrows right now will be a mark of pride for him. He’ll be sad he missed it.” 

Lypatri sniffled. “But the al’baar’ur…” 

“I haven’t known her for long, but from what I do know of her, she would never give up on you.”

“But they didn’t….” Lypatri sniffled. “They might change their minds….or what if...”

Rima sighed. She understood the reasoning to wait, but she didn’t really agree with it. “Are you worried about what will happen to you if something happens to them?” At Lypatri’s hesitant nod, Rima smiled. “We talked about that. If something happens to them, I will say the gal bai manda for you. We are of the same clan, and you’ll still have the name Tadasco.” Rima gave Lypatri’s shoulders a squeeze. “You have a yaim -a home- and an aliit -a family- here. And you always will.”

Lypatri began to cry in earnest, and buried her face in her hands. Rima pulled her into her chest and hugged her. “Did your ba’buir tell you the story of your name?”

Lypatri nodded a little. 

“So he told you that the beskar mythosaur skull we have right over there is supposed to contain the skull of the mythosaur that your namesake rode.”

Lypatri peered at the skull. “Really?”

“Mmmhmmm.” 

“Can I ride a mythosaur?”

“They’re extinct, ad’ika. But if they still existed, I believe you would ride one.” 

  
  


Later that night, Saojeme brought Lypatri over to Tuathal’s rooms, where Jha’iil was waiting. Tuathal had given her a smile and promised to tell her about the time that Cuan and Arkil almost demolished a building under construction when they were children. 

“You found the right family, ad’ika.” 

Jha’iil clambered on Tuathal’s lap, and Lypatri curled up near -not touching, but near. Atin hopped up on the other side of Tuathal, after giving Lypatri a suspicious look. He curled up, pressing against Tuathal’s thigh, and Jha’iil tapped on his datapad.

“A young man walked through the forest  
With his quiver and hunting bow  
He heard a young girl singing  
And followed the sound below  
There he found the maiden  
Who lives in the willow.”

“Who is that?”

“Ba’vodu!” Jha’iil hummed along, leaning against Tuathal’s chest. Lypatri’s eyes drifted closed, and she fell asleep to the sound of the song. 

“See me now, a ray of light in the moondance…” 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Willow Maiden, by Erutan https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l4etPUaNw9I (There's no deep meaning here. I just think it's a pretty song, and it's fun to sing, especially the "see me now" part.) 
> 
> Mando'a Translations
> 
> Mesh’la: beautiful  
> Ner ruus: My rock  
> cyare: Beloved  
> ori’vod: Older sibling  
> LaarSenaar: Songbird  
> verd: soldier  
> ruus’alor: sergeant  
> verd’ika: private (rank) Can be used affectionately, often to a child; *little soldier* - context is critical.  
> buire: parents  
> vod’ika: younger sibling  
> K’oyacyi: 1. *Cheers!* 2. Can also mean: *Hang in there* or 3. *Come back safely.* Literally, a command; *Stay alive!*  
> Gar kar’taylir darasuum: I love you  
> al’baar’ur: Doctor  
> Alor: Chief  
> ba’vodu: parent's sibling  
> ad’ika: Little one.  
> bu: Diminutive for parent. In this case "Dad."  
> Kurs’ika: Wolf cub ("Little wolf")  
> ba’buir: Grandparent (Yes, technically Tuathal would be ba'ba'buir but that's edging towards ridiculous, and this is a very serious fic.)


	30. Splinters of my soul cut through your skin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cara and Teryn walk into the viper's nest. 
> 
> CN for child abuse. It's not graphic, and this has been leading up to seeing what these traffickers do, but just in case. 
> 
> There is no sexual assault (implied or otherwise) of anyone.

Both Din and Cuan stared at the door after Cara vanished out of it. Zake busied herself by cleaning up. The two Mandolorians had decided they would give Cara and Teryn a solid head start, and sneak out the back, just so they wouldn’t be associated with an obnoxious, imperious factory owner and her bodyguard. 

“They’ll be fine.” 

Both men turned to look at Zake, and she nodded at the door. “They’ll be fine. She’s a quick study.” She looked at them both, eyes flicking from one to the other. “She knows what she’s about.” 

Cuan sighed and glanced at the door again. “Thank you for your help.”

“Please do not mention it.” Zake glanced at Din, then back down at the cups she had in her hands. “Someone needs to do something. Children need hope.” 

“We’ll let you know if we need anything else.” Din said. “...do you… need anything?”

“I have everything I could need,” Zake said, quietly. “What more could I possibly ask for?”

Din took a breath, but realized he wasn’t entirely sure what he was going to say. Cuan made a soft noise of disgust. He fully admitted that his game wasn’t particularly strong or nuanced, but damn. It had _worked_. 

  
  


Teryn sat in the passenger compartment of the cruiser Cara had acquired. She wasn’t sure if they were supposed to bring it back, or what arrangements Cara had made, but she also didn't care. Her persona didn’t care, and ultimately, she really didn’t, either. 

Knowing Cara, that was a Karga problem. _‘Favorite Uncle Karga’. Fuck that._

The name Karga had given as her cover was Miakai Lesket, a factory owner from Nevarro. Karga had set the meeting up through an intermediary, with the hope that it wouldn’t get tied back to him. They all knew it almost certainly could be, hence Teryn’s desire to keep the meeting as short as possible. 

Get in, look around, get a sense of the layout and defenses, see how many kids were there and what needed to be done to cut the head off this snake. They all knew very well that the snake on Ord Mantell probably was one of many, but it would be a start. 

It would matter to those kids. 

Once they reached Ord Mantell, they were given a location to land. Cara popped open a panel and quickly scrawled the coordinates on the inside before replacing it- as all Mandalorians were taught, a healthy amount of paranoia was healthy, and Cara had bought into that philosophy wholeheartedly. While the traffickers might require them to wipe their navigation drives, the odds of them finding those notes were vanishingly small. 

Teryn and Cara gave each other another, final once over. Teryn tilted her head in a question, and Cara patted her belt.

_You have the communicator?_

_Yeah, right here._

They’d managed to rig it so that Teryn could send a burst of static through her ear communicator to Cara if they got separated. 

Teryn nodded, affected the hauteur of Miakai, and Cara hit the hatch. Teryn sauntered out, looking around with bored disinterest. Cara followed, doing a quick sweep, hand on her blaster. The landing pads- there were room for at least three smaller transports- faced a long blank wall with several large doors, and one small door off to the side.

The man waiting for them at the edge of the landing pad was dressed simply. Simply, but, Teryn noted, as she took in the tailoring, the quality of the material, and most notably the shoes, expensively. This was someone with wealth, and taste, and expectations to match. 

This man required a slightly different touch than she’d expected, and she swayed her hips a bit as she approached him. He gave her garish plumage a once over, lip ever so slightly curled and nostrils flared. “Miakai Lesket?”

“Yes.” He didn’t offer a hand, and Teryn’s eyes flicked to see two armed guards behind him, hands on blaster rifles. She looked back at the expensively dressed man and smiled. “Welcoming committee, I see.”

“We don’t know you.” He looked her up and down again, from boots to hair, and did not offer his hand. “Maxgav Shaire.” Teryn inclined her head, and following his lead did not offer her own. He glanced at Cara, who met his gaze unflinchingly. “Who is this?”

“The help.” Teryn started towards the entrance. “Shall we? I have several pressing engagements.” 

He gave a tight smile, and ushered them inside the smaller door. Cara followed Teryn, and the guards followed them both. Off to one side was a guard room- Cara could see at least two more guards in there, with a good supply of guns. They all trooped into an office- unlike the dingy hallway, the office was comfortably decorated and furnished. Teryn raised an eyebrow, and Maxgav shrugged. “I prefer to spend my time in more pleasant surroundings.” 

Teryn nodded and sat down in the chair he indicated, flipping the skirts of the coat behind her and crossing one leg over the other. She settled back in the chair, the picture of bored insolence

“I understand you have some.. Specialized needs.” He perched on the edge of his desk, so he could look down at Teryn. Cara positioned herself by the door. 

“I do. My family has a factory on Nevarro, and the machinery… well, it requires workers that are small and quick. And jawas… they’re a little too chaotic.” Teryn grinned. “I’m sure you understand.”

Maxgav nodded. “Normally, we wouldn’t entertain another buyer. Our current arrangement takes most of the merchandise. But as it happens, we just got a larger than expected shipment, so… perhaps some arrangements could be made.” 

Teryn kept her face and body still, even as inside she raged at the emotionless terms. Shipments. Buyers. Merchandise. “I realize I might need to find several sources, but… well, one does what one must.” 

“Indeed.” He picked up a datapad. “How many were you thinking?”

She shrugged diffidently. “However many you can manage. I’ve found that there’s...high turnover. Some just don’t work out for one reason or another.” 

“Hm. I might be able to spare ten or so, but my pick.” He smiled, slow and cruel. 

Teryn shrugged again. “Can I see what you’ve got? I think it’s only fair that I least get to make requests.” She smiled at him, trying for charming, but she could tell it was getting brittle around the edges. 

Maxgav frowned, fingers drumming on the datapad while he considered. “I don’t see why not.” He glanced at Cara. “Your help can stay here.” 

“I stay with her.” 

Teryn shrugged. “My brother is overly concerned with my safety. She follows me everywhere. I do mean _everywhere._ It’s invasive and profoundly annoying, but… well, he pays the bills, so it’s easier to just humor him.” She sighed in exasperation. “I was able to ditch the last three, but this one is actually… effective.” 

Maxgav chuckled. “What happened to the ones you ditched?” 

“He probably killed them.” Teryn waved her hand dismissively. “Who cares?” 

“Seems harsh.”

“They couldn’t do the job.” Teryn smiled again, letting her teeth show a little. 

He nodded thoughtfully, then went to the door. “I’ll have one of my own men accompany us, as well. I’m sure you understand. What kind of factory did you say you had, again?”

“I didn’t.”

“I’m unaware of any manufacturing industry on Nevarro.”

“Shortsighted, really. The lava fields are full of thermal energy that can power a factory.” She grinned. “We’re building the first munitions factory there.”

“Bold, building where the Bounty Hunters Guild is located.” 

Teryn shrugged, heading for the door. “They’re on their way out. People don’t want to pay guild rates, so how long can they survive, really? Nevarro will need some industry. Why shouldn’t we get in early?” Her smile deepened. “That’s where the money is, isn’t it?”

“With all the unrest, I can see how that could be lucrative.” 

She smiled again, thinking to herself that her face muscles were going to be exhausted after this. “That’s the hope.”

He opened the door and gestured for them to go further down the hallway, signaling for one of his guards to follow. Cara eyed him up and down as he sized her up the same way. After the briefest of standoffs, they both gave each other a minuscule nod and followed their charges down the hall. 

At the end of the hall was another door, and they went through it to emerge on a catwalk overlooking a large warehouse room, and in that room… were children. The smell coming up from the room was full of fear and filth and disease, and Teryn counted at least twenty in that room alone. They were all sitting quietly, scared. Defenseless. 

Some looked to be the same age as Lypatri. If she hadn’t escaped… 

Teryn’s hand fluttered a bit and her jaw tightened as she looked down at them. “These aren’t all you have, surely.” 

“No, no, these are the youngest ones we’ve had the longest. It’s been getting slightly more difficult to find the merchandise.” He twitched his nose in irritation. “Sometimes it’s hard to judge ages, but we do our best.” 

“What ages do you have?”

“We try to avoid anyone younger than about five. By then they can feed themselves. Older than twelve, and they’re not terribly useful for our usual buyer.” He led them along the catwalk, overlooking another room, with another batch of older children, almost all of whom had restraint collars on. “Some of these are more recent arrivals. They often do come with ideas of escape. It takes time to remove that idea.” 

“Hmmmmm.” Teryn nodded. There were a few guards, and one dark haired woman down with the group, wearing a collar of some kind. She was handing out bowls of food… at least it looked like it was supposed to be food. Teryn heard Cara exhale slowly. 

“And in the final room down here, these are our newest arrivals.” 

There was shouting. The shouting was in a familiar rhythm, and Teryn felt herself going pale under the mask.

Children in the Nevarro Covert were quiet. They had needed to be. Once they arrived on Samaki, the Herd there was loud and boisterous, and arguments were often conducted at full volume. These shrieks of anger and invective were different. 

But they were still in Mando’a. 

“These just came in.” He smirked, almost triumphantly. “Mandalorians.” 

Twelve of them, in collars and cuffs, all screaming, struggling against the guards. Words like “chaakar” and “shabuir” and “hut’uun” and one that howled, “delmagolka.” 

And none of them were wrong. Teryn swept her gaze over the lot of them and thanked the Manda and whatever gods might be listening that she didn’t recognize them. They didn’t come from Samaki. Her people -all of them- were still safe. 

Then she felt terrible for that thought. 

“Where did you get them?”

“They were trying to get on a transport. Had a few adults with them, but they were no match for my team.” 

Teryn wondered precisely how many were on the team, how many remained on that team, and what happened to the rest of the Covert these children came from. And, she gritted her teeth, if there were any ik’aade that were left behind. 

“I won’t be selling you any of these. My buyer has specifically said that he wants any Mandalorian children I come across.” Maxgav smiled coldly. “I heard there used to be a nest of vermin on Nevarro. Too bad their whelps seem to have gotten away.”

The al’baar’ur of the Nevarro Tribe nodded in agreement, fighting to keep down the bile rising in her throat. “Yes. Too bad.” 

Cara kept her eyes open and mouth shut, even as she could tell that Teryn was working to keep her composure. The number of guards posted on the catwalk was manageable, but several seemed to have HUDs. There were several guards in each room, even in the one with the smaller children who appeared to be completely traumatized and cowed. 

At the far side of each room was a door, and there was a wall of windows looking down into each room. Cara could see movement in those windows, but had no idea how many guards could be there, or what weaponry they had.

She had tried to get a sense of the building from a map, once they got the coordinates, but the back end of the building faced into the warren of alleyways and narrow streets that made up this section of the city. It was hard to know precisely what the story was behind those doors. 

All in all, the number of guards appeared to be something a well-trained squad of Mandalorians could handle. The problem, as she saw it, was that it didn’t look like there was an easy way to figure out what it was she couldn’t see. 

And the kids screaming in the third room- she couldn’t understand the language, but some of the words seemed familiar. She closed her eyes briefly to try to think where she’d heard any of them before. 

_Din standing up too quickly and whacking his helmet on a strut on the Razor Crest, and smacking it. “Chakaar!”_

She opened her eyes, and could see the tension in Teryn’s neck. This just got a lot more complicated. 

  
  


“Shall we adjourn to the office, and discuss specifics?” Maxgav gave Teryn a smile that wasn’t just cold, it was predatory around the edges. 

_Ah. Those kinds of specifics._

Cara shifted slightly, and Teryn gave her a small wave to hold back. “Of course.” She tilted her head slightly coyly. “Is there a place where she-” Teryn waved a dismissive hand at Cara, “-can relax while we discuss the specifics.”

“I don’t think-” Cara started, and stopped when Teryn rolled her eyes.

“What my brother doesn’t know won’t hurt him, and more importantly, won’t hurt you. So go. Put your feet up in whatever hole they use to relax around here.” She narrowed her eyes, and Cara nodded slowly.

“Yes, ma’am.” 

Teryn shot Maxgav a look of bored exasperation. “These people.” 

He smiled in agreement, and signaled for his guard to take Cara to their break room, and placed a hand on Teryn’s back to lead her back to his office. He glanced down into the room full of angry Mando’ade, and barked, “No food! They’ll break quicker if they’re hungry.” 

Teryn glanced down to see the dark haired woman pushing the cart of food bowls in, and she turned to look up. She gave Albanor a quick nod, and turned to go, but not before she looked at Teryn, and for a moment, there was the flash of bone-deep hatred and fury in her eyes. 

Teryn flinched. There was something… 

“She was a gift.” 

“Oh?”

“Yes, our usual buyer gave her to us to keep the merchandise alive.” Maxgav smirked. “She’s useful.” 

“I can see.” Teryn looked down at the woman again, frowning, and allowed him to usher her back to his office, and she sat down in the chair again. 

“Can I offer you anything to drink?”

“Tea would be lovely, if you have it.”

“Civilized. I appreciate that. So many of these people I have working for me are so uncouth.” Maxgav tapped on an intercom and called for tea. 

Teryn gave him a smile again, cheeks beginning to ache. “Specifics.”

“Do you have any requests?” 

“Well, while it could be fun to have a Mandalorian or two, I understand that they aren’t available. A few of the younger ones, for those tight, hard to reach spots. Then some of the older. How ever many you can spare.” 

“We only deal in hard credits.”

“Of course.” Teryn expected nothing else. In fact, she was relying on it. “How many, then? Ten?”

“I think I can spare ten. Six of the young ones, four of the older?” In other words, he had ten that he thought would displease his usual buyer, and he was hoping to make a profit in getting rid of them. 

The dark haired woman with the collar came in with the tea, and clumsily served it. She spilled a bit and earned a cuff on the ear, and she cringed away from Maxgav. Teryn’s mouth twitched again. There was something that was bothering her, something just at the edge of… the woman left. 

“Four younger, six older. Reasonable. How much are you asking?”

“How much can you offer?”

She gave him a completely unfeigned smile. This would be fun, at least if she could forget what they were arguing over. “What do you usually get for them?” 

“Depends.”

“On?”

“Age, health, a certain… zest for life.” He shrugged, moving closer to her. “I often get 10,000 each.”

That was almost certainly a lie. “I do wonder who your usual buyer is that can afford such a price.”

“It is an interesting question, is it not?” He smiled, but said no more.

“Mmmm. Well, I can offer this: 75,000 for all ten.” 

“Very low. These will be good workers for you. Exactly what you need. 95,000.”

“The little ones didn’t look very healthy at all. I’m going to have to spend time and money getting them up to weight. 80,000.”

“They came that way.” He allowed his eyes to rove up and down her body. “We could come to an… alternate arrangement.” 

“Could we?” She tilted her head, and uncrossed and recrossed her legs, muscles rippling in the tight pants. 

“I’m sure we could.”

Cara glanced around as she accepted a cup of… something. It smelled odd, looked oily, and there was no way in hell she was going to drink it. She nodded at the group of guards clustered around the break room.

“She looks like a real rich bitch.”

Cara shrugged. “Job pays.” She held her cup up in a mock toast. “Maybe better than yours, but…yeah, she is.”

“Hey, our boss is a hard ass when it comes to get the merchandise on time, but he doesn’t care much about what we gotta do to get it.” One of the guards said, shrugging. “Sometimes we get lucky.”

“Not all of us were lucky,” said another, with a heavily bandaged face and clutching his ribs. 

“What happened?”

“Mandos.” At Cara’s inquiring eyebrow, the bandaged guard groaned in pain. “We happened on a group of Mandos on Taris, trying to get a transport. Couple adults, mostly kids. We get a bonus if we get Mando kids, so we went for it.”

“When was this?” 

“Late last night.”

“How many did you have?”

“Ten. Seven of us walked away, but no one was unscathed. Even the damn kids went at us.” 

Cara twitched an eyebrow. Ten against two was hardly sporting, but Mando kids were vicious. She filed that information away. Taris. “You get paid decently, at least?” 

“Not bad. Not great, but… there’s a lot of out of work mercs, you know? We gotta take what we can get.”

Cara nodded. She did know. “Whatcha got for weapons around here?” And then the communicator let out two short blasts of static. 

Maxgav looked at Teryn again, smug and possessive. She managed, barely, to control her sneer into a smile. She stood up to go to the door, and with a saucy look back at him, locked it. She turned towards him so the ear with the communicator was facing toward the door, and she reached up and tapped it twice. That would get Cara’s attention. 

There was only one way for this to end, at this point. 

He pressed her against the door, and ran a hand down her neck, down her breast bone between the draped scarves, and paused when his fingers touched on the beskar mythosaur. He pulled it out and frowned at it, then looked up at Teryn, realization beginning to dawn. 

She smiled then, fully, dangerously, and pulled one of the sharpened sticks out of her hair with one hand and grabbed him by the front of his expensive tunic with the other. 

“Did you really think no one would come for them?” 

His eyes widened in actual fear, he inhaled, and she stabbed him in the base of the skull. 

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mando'a Translations
> 
> chaakar: corpse robber, thief, petty criminal - general term of abuse  
> shabuir: extreme insult - *jerk*, but much stronger  
> hut’uun: coward (worst possible insult)  
> delmagolka: someone who commits atrocties, a real-life monster, a war criminal - from the notorious Mandalorian scientist of the Old Republic, Demagol, known for his experiments on children, and a figure of hate and dread in the Mando psyche  
> mando'ade: Children of Mandalore  
> ik'aade: (plural) baby, child under 3  
> al'baar'ur: Doctor


	31. Put up your dukes, let's get down to it

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “So… now what? Do we just… walk out of here?”
> 
> “Sure.” Just like that. Couldn’t be simpler.
> 
> SURE.

Din and Cuan left through the back door, Cuan going first. Din paused by the door and looked at Zake. She gave him a smile that seemed serene but underneath he could tell she was anxious. 

“Thank you. We couldn’t have done this without you.”

“I am happy to have been of some help.” She reached out to put a hand on his arm and pulled it back. Without thinking, he took her hand in his and ran his thumb over her knuckles. She stared down at his hand. 

“It’s been more than some.”

“Please let me know how it goes.” She took a deep breath, squeezing his fingers, then suddenly went, “Oh! The paints.” She pulled her hand out of his and snatched up a small bag. “For your son.” 

Din took the bag and looked at it for a few seconds, before looking back up at her, “Zake, I…”

“You need to go. Those children need you.” She smiled. “Go. Don’t be a stranger.” He nodded, and after the briefest of hesitations, vanished out the door. She slumped back against the wall, flexing her hand.

He’d never touched her hand before. 

Teryn looked down at the body of Maxgev Shaire, mouth twisted in satisfaction. Yes, this would complicate things, but damn. It felt good to kill him. Pity it had to be so quick, but there wasn’t always time for a properly vengeful death. She went to the desk and started rifling through it, looking for any information that could help them when there was a scratch at the door. 

She unlocked it and let Cara in. Cara looked down at Maxgev's body with the metal spike still sticking out of the base of his skull. “Really?”

Teryn held up a finger. “Listen, it had to be done sooner or later.”

Cara sighed heavily. “Your brother is going to kill me, and if there’s anything left, Socks is gonna kill me too.”

Teryn paused in her rifling. “Socks?”

“You bought him socks, so…” Cara shrugged. “So… now what? Do we just… walk out of here?”

“Sure.” Just like that. Couldn’t be simpler.

Cara gave Teryn a dubious look, then raised an eyebrow down at the boots. “How fast can you run in those things?”

Teryn glanced down at the impossible boots and sighed. “Not very. Give me your knife.” Cara handed her the vibroblade and she carefully cut around the soles, removing them completely. 

Cara huffed, impressed. “Steady hands.”

“Well, I do surgery, so….” Teryn frowned at the remains of the boots. Leaving in bare feet wasn’t the best idea, but not being able to run was worse. 

Cara picked up a couple of datapads and, she sneered at the pure pretension of it, a leather bound ledger. “Even Karga doesn’t use something this…snooty.” 

Teryn snorted. “This guy was a bloodsucking bastard and it’s better for the galaxy that he’s dead.” She tilted her head down at his shoes, and cocked her head, mentally measuring his feet. They _were_ good shoes. 

“So we’re going to try to walk casually past the guard booth at the end of the hall and when that doesn’t work, make a run for it?” 

“That’s kind of what I was thinking.” Teryn pulled on Maxgev’s shoes and shrugged. Close enough. 

Cara unholstered a blaster, and handed it to Teryn, who hid it in the skirts of the coat. The vibroblade was tucked up one sleeve and she nodded at Cara. “Ready. Calm, quiet, casual.” 

“Casual.” Cara nodded, pulled out a second blaster, and went to the door. She paused and glanced down at Maxgev's body. “Wait.” She handed Teryn her blaster and hauled the body behind the desk, so it wasn’t visible immediately. It would buy them a few minutes, and they needed as many of those as they could get. 

Teryn nodded at the door, and Cara opened it. Teryn swept out, imperious, and started down the hallway. Maxgev’s guard waited in the hall and Teryn strode past him. 

“Ma’am?”

Teryn waved a hand. “We’ll be back,” and continued towards the door to the landing pad. Another guard stepped out of the guard room right next to the door to stop them. Teryn swept him up and down with a withering gaze. “Open the door.” 

“Where are you going?” 

“To my ship. Move.” Teryn’s eyes went steely and without the boots, her posture had shifted to something more dangerous, more predatory. The guard shifted uncomfortably and looked down before moving away from the door. She opened it with a disdainful push and stalked towards the ship, eyes looking left and right for any movement. She could hear Cara behind her. 

“Hey, wait. Those aren’t the same shoes you had on before.” The guard at the door called after them. Teryn stopped; she heard Cara whisper an oath behind her. Teryn pasted on a smile and turned, keeping the hand with the blaster hidden but her finger on the trigger. 

“No, your boss was kind enough to lend me his when the heels broke. I can’t believe I need to execute another bootmaker, but what can you do?”

“Overselling it,” Cara muttered. 

The guard nodded slowly. “So, you’ll be back.”

“Yes. With the credits.” Teryn smiled again. “Sooner I leave, sooner I’ll be back. Maybe with a bit of a bonus…?” The guard visibly brightened at the mention of a bonus, and Teryn nodded graciously. “See you soon.” 

They turned back to the ship, trying to be unhurried and unconcerned, but the back of Cara’s neck started to tingle. “Run.” Without hesitation Teryn broke into a dead run for the ship, Cara right behind her. They could hear yelling- apparently someone had found the body. Teryn ran up the ramp and headed straight for the cockpit while Cara, with a gleeful cackle, opened fire on the few guards that came out. 

Teryn ripped off the mask and began the take off procedures, mentally thanking Din for making her learn how to fly. It had been a rough few weeks, and she nearly murdered him at least four times, but it had come in handy more than once. She heard Cara bellow to shut the hatch, and she turned the controls over to the astromech. “Away, fast.”

Teryn ran back to Cara, losing first one shoe, then the other, and gave her a practiced once over. “Hurt?”

“No.” Cara leaned back against the bulkhead. “That…”

“Process later. Communicator. Codeword is ‘shereshoy.’” Teryn grabbed the ledger and flipped it to a blank page and started sketching. Cara nodded.

As Cara got the coordinates and delivered them to the droid, Teryn drew out as detailed a floorplan as she could remember. There were some blank spots that she never saw- what was behind the big doors leading in from the landing pad? How did the children get moved from the landing pad to the holding rooms? 

Her hands started to shake. The haunted, hopeless look of the youngest. And the spitting mad Mando’ade. She wanted to get into her armor, go back and raise some hell. She put down the pen and massaged under her jaw. 

A quick death was too good for that chakaar. When they found his buyer though? That person would die as slowly as she could make them. 

Cara came back and picked up the sketch and nodded at it. She reached for the pencil and saw Teryn’s hands shaking. “Hey.” Cara put her hand over Teryn’s. “Hey, it’s okay. We got out, we’re gonna come back. We’ll get them. You did great.” 

“We don’t have much time.” 

“No, but we’ll meet the others in less than twenty minutes.” 

“We should have brought my armor.” Teryn whispered. “I should have… thought of something else. A different plan, a better one. We don’t have time.” She started to cut off the uppers of the boots- it was faster than getting them off any other way. 

Cuan was going to be _crushed_. She tossed away the uppers and pressed her fingers at the top of her nose. That was a stupid thing to think about. Especially after everything that had just happened. 

“You need to pull yourself together. Just for a bit more. You can do that.” 

“Yeah. I can. I can do that.” Teryn started to yank at the hairstyle Zake had so carefully arranged, getting more and more frustrated, until Cara stepped behind her to help. Teryn froze. 

“Alderaan was known for complicated hair,” Cara said quietly. “I used to help my sisters…” 

Teryn smiled faintly. “I didn’t know you had sisters.”

“I don’t talk about them. I don’t like to go back there.” 

“I never had a sister. Just an idiot brother.” 

“I never had an idiot brother.” 

“You can share mine. He’s too much trouble for just one of us.” 

The Razor Crest had met up with the other ships just outside the edge of the city, and everyone was waiting. Cuan was pacing impatiently. Din leaned against the wall, anxious but conserving energy. His vod’ika was smart. His vod’ika had lived among the aruetiise for over ten years. She was brave and quick and she had Cara so there really shouldn’t be anything to worry about. 

He was worried.

The others had arrived and were also waiting. There was no telling how long this would take, or at what point they would just charge in blind. Or where. They still didn’t know where they were going. Or how many. Or anything. 

Kata perched on a crate of weapons. “Hey, Tadasco, wanna hear what your Foundling did?”

Din looked up as Cuan turned. “What?”

“She and your vod’ad blew up a rock formation. Kid doesn’t have eyebrows.” 

Cuan frowned. “Is she hurt?” 

“Nah, just scared. Worried that you’re not gonna want her, but we all told her that you’d love this.”

Cuan turned to look at Atriu, who’d faded behind a few others, and was shooting a glare at Kata. “You did what?”

She took a deep breath. “It seemed like a good idea at the time.” 

Cuan rolled his eyes. “You’re not hurt?”

“No, ba’vodu.” Atriu looked at him earnestly. “We just... made a bad choice.”

“Which choice was that?” 

“Well, alor would say that it was stealing the explosives at all, but I think buir would say it was not planting the bomb in the ground. I just thought the rock wouldn’t burn, so….” 

Everyone laughed at that, even those who had never met Arkil. The Nevarro warriors had all been there when they buried him, so his Foundling was of course of some interest. Besides, they all knew, Nevarro and Samaki alike, that you lived as long as there was someone to tell stories about you. “I just hope we all manage to survive you two.” He shook his head, excited to tell his LaarSenaar about what their Foundling did. 

There was a burst of static from the communicator in Din’s hand, and then Cara’s voice saying “Shereshoy! I think that’s what she said. Fuck it, we’re on our way.” Everyone jumped to attention as Din rattled off the coordinates, and Cuan darted into the Razor Crest to set out Teryn’s armor. 

Paz glanced at Din. “How long?” 

“Twenty minutes, maybe less.” 

Paz nodded. He’d checked to make sure Faris hadn’t snuck along on this mission. He’d checked several times. He’d seen him with his agemates when they left, and he was still half-convinced the kid would pop out of a storage compartment, ready to help. He had less than a month before he was of age and Paz wouldn’t be able to protect him any longer.

Just like he hadn’t been able to protect his older two. 

He sighed to himself. The Way was a cold comfort when you knew what it cost. But his entire life had been in service to the Way, the Tribe, the survival of his people. There was no direction except forward. 

A ship approached.Paz readied his repeating rifle and everyone else took a defensive stance. The ship landed. There was a pause before the hatch opened, but no one came out. 

Paz nodded. This was protocol. “Haatyc or'arue jate'shya,” he called. 

“Ori'sol aru'ike nuhaatyc.”

“Prove it’s you.” 

There was a pause. “You’re a fucking asshole.” 

Din choked and Cuan barked a laugh. “It’s them.” Teryn came down the ramp, shoeless, holding the coat closed with one hand. Paz made a sound of disapproval. Cuan frowned to himself at her lack of shoes- that implied something had gone vastly different than planned. 

And her face- both she and Cara’s expressions were variations on haunted and wrathful. 

“How bad is it?” Din asked in Basic. Cara’s Mando’a was limited to swears and alcohol. 

“Bad.” Cara said. “And things got complicated.”

“How complicated?”

Teryn looked at Din and only Din. “They have Mando kids.” There was a shocked silence, the entire group burst out in anger. More than one person demanded to know where they were from- did they come from Samaki? Did their home get attacked? 

Cuan put a hand on Teryn’s back. She flinched and shrugged it off, continuing to look at Din, who stared back in shock. “There are at least thirty auretiise kids, and twelve Mando’ade. I don’t know where they came from- they aren’t ours.” 

“Taris,” Cara said. “The guards in the breakroom said they were from Taris. They got them last night.” 

Cuan growled, “You left her alone?”

“Knock it off!” snapped Teryn. “I told her to.” She opened up the ledger and showed them the map. “The kids are in three rooms, on a lower level. Some of them have restraint collars…” She paused, and held up a hand, then stepped away from the group and quietly threw up. 

“It was really bad,” Cara murmured. 

Teryn came back and took a canteen that Ordo silently handed her. “Can anyone remove the collars?” She tightened the coat around her again, as if it could shield her. 

“That’s why I’m here,” said Kata. “I can get that shit off. How many?” 

Teryn nodded, closing her eyes. “The twelve Mando’ade had necks and cuffs… another ten or so with just collars… and the woman.”

“What woman?”

“A woman that was a ‘gift’ from their usual buyer. I think she’s the one that helped Lypatri escape.” She fixed a glare around at all of them. “We’re getting her, too.” 

“I don’t…” Paz started, and Teryn whirled on him, pulling the other hair stick out and holding it under his chin. 

“If she hadn’t done what she did, if she hadn’t given Lypatri the mythosaur and got her out, what do you think would happen to those kids? They are Mando’ade, Paz Vizsla, and she saved them, along with the rest. The fucking least we can do is bring her out of that hell hole.” 

There was silence and slowly Paz nodded. “Fine.” 

“Good.” Teryn put the hair stick back. 

“How many guards?”

“More than four,” Cara said, glancing sideways at Din. He huffed. “I saw at least twenty five, maybe thirty. But I don’t know what’s here.” She pointed to the back walls of the warehouse. “There are doors, but I didn’t see them open. I don’t know how many might be back there.” 

“Who’s in charge of this? The guy you met?”

Teryn looked guiltily at Cara. “Well… no. Not… anymore.” 

“LaarSenaar, what did you do?”

Teryn looked down at her bare feet. “He’s not going to be a problem… well,” she amended. “Not directly. The fact that he’s dead might be a problem.” She looked around at the shocked visors of the assembled warriors and shrugged. “It was the best of several bad options.” 

“The advantage is,” Cara said, “they don’t know why he’s dead. He seemed the type to rack up enemies. My guess is they’re running around trying to figure out what to do, and even if they call someone, they’re unlikely to be here incredibly soon. And they like to go for overwhelming numbers instead of tactics.” 

“What makes you say that?” asked Ordo.

Din nodded. “They sent ten guys after one runaway kid.”

“And ten attacked a group of Mando kids with two adults. They go for shock and awe, not delicacy.” Cara added. 

Din sighed. “We still don’t have a lot of time. Vod’ika, go get armored up.” He turned to Cara. “Do you see what kind of weapons they had?”

“Some of them had HUDs, but only a handful…” 

  
  


Teryn went to the Razor Crest walking as fast as she could on bare feet, followed by Cuan. He could tell that she was shaken and upset, and if there was anything he could do… She dropped the coat even before going up the ramp, and started yanking on the scarves draping her torso. 

“Hey, hey, cyar’ika, stop. What happened to your boots?”

“Who cares about the fucking boots.” she snarled, looking around, frustrated.

“I’m just… what happened? What do you need?” 

“I need a washcloth. Now.” 

He silently went to the refresher and brought her a damp one, growling to himself as she scrubbed frantically at her neck and down front of her torso. “Cyare, did he…” He stepped forward, and she stepped back, holding up a hand to hold him off. 

“Don’t.”

“Cyare…” He slowly stepped back. 

She shook her head tightly, and started to yank on her undergear. “It doesn’t matter, he’s dead. That fucking.. He’s dead and we’re going to get the others.” 

“LaarSenaar.” He sounded sad and worried and angry. “What really happened?” 

“I told the skraan’ur, when we found him.” She started putting on her armor, piece by piece. “He told me that he hadn’t betrayed his oath, and I told him….” She stopped, not looking at Cuan, resolutely not looking at him at all. “I told him ‘Don’t you think I can tell when someone has lost their soul?’”

“You think….?”

“I _know._ ” Teryn said, voice cracking. “I don’t know where she’s from. I don’t know what happened to her. But I know. She’s… we’re bringing her.” 

“Okay.” 

She looked at him sideways, warily, like she’d been half afraid he would fight her on this. “Really?” 

He huffed quietly, “Your fights are mine. If you’re right, who knows what she needs better than you?” She reached out and grabbed his hand- squeezing as hard as she could. He squeezed back, and she finally looked fully at him. He reached out to touch her hair and she pulled back, letting go of his hand. He sighed quietly. “Guess what our Kurs’ika did?”

“What?” She knew he was trying to distract her, and truthfully, she was glad for it. 

“She and Atriu stole some explosives and apparently blew up a rock formation.” 

Teryn looked at him in shock, and then concern. She could tell he was grinning and that he was inexplicably proud of this nonsense. “Is she hurt?”

“According to Kata, she has no eyebrows. But she’s fine.” 

“You’re proud of this?”

“I’m just sad I missed our ad’ika’s first bomb.” He laughed. “Shereshoy.” 

She shook her head, and muttered something that sounded suspiciously like, “raising Foundlings with you is going to be a disaster.” He grinned to himself. 

“I brought this.” He reached into her armor bag and held the beskar mail hood out. 

“Oh….” she nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, that’s a… that’s a good idea.” She started to quickly put her hair back so it would be out of the way.

“You sure?”

Teryn shook her head. “No, but I don’t feel sure of anything right now.” She took it, frowning at it, before finally muttering, “fuck it” and pulled it on. “I hate it.” 

“The hood?”

“How it makes me feel.” She sighed and stood up. He again put a hand on her arm and she again shrugged it off. “Don’t _touch_ me.” 

She stalked down the ramp, feeling more comfortable with her armor between her and the universe, and everyone -everyone- stopped and stared at the hood. Paz shoved his way to the front. “What the fuck is that,” he snapped. “You can’t wear that.”

“It’s not a helmet, osi’yaim.”

“You _cannot_ wear that, you don’t have the-” He stepped forward, a hand out towards the hood, and she smacked it with the flat of a vibroblade. He snarled and she flicked the blade on. _Try it._

“I know _exactly_ what I am. You’ve always made that very clear. Back off.” She heard a growl from Cuan behind her, and was mildly surprised and relieved to hear one from Din, as well. What was completely unexpected was the undercurrent of anger aimed towards Paz from almost everyone else present, including the people from Nevarro.

He looked around at everyone and, with effort, stepped back. She turned off the knife and turned her back to him. 

Din nodded to himself. That show of support could only be good for Teryn’s peace of mind. 

“Ori’vod, is there a plan?” 

“Yeah. It’s… loose.” Din activated a holomap. “I got this when I was hunting in the city. It’s probably not accurate- the alleys back there are constantly changing, but there should be a way in through the back here. The plan is for a group to go in the back and pull out the kids, while the rest of us assault the front, loudly, to draw them out.”

“Seems simple enough.” Cuan nodded. 

“We had originally thought that we’d capture your contact alive, and get what information we could from him,” said Ademe, the al’verde of the Samaki tribe. “But since that’s apparently not an option… we’ll have to grab someone else.” 

Cara drummed her fingers on the stack of datapads and the ledger. “We took what we could find, hopefully there’s something useful in here.” 

“First priority: get the kids, get out. Kill whoever gets in your way. Get the woman-” Ademe nodded at Teryn. “You’re right, al’baar’ur, we owe her that. Stay alive. We have smoke bombs, so you two-” she pointed at Teryn and Cara, “-should stay outside. You’ll be needed for medical, anyway.” 

Teryn nodded. That made sense. She looked firmly at Cuan. _Make sure you get her._ He nodded back. 

“We’re going fuck them up.” Din snarled. “Oya Manda.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The interesting difference between Cuan and Din as the heroes of their respective romantic arcs is that Cuan's love language is touch. Din is a Regency hero where touch is Not Done. 
> 
> This is gonna be fun. 
> 
> Mando'a Translations
> 
> shereshoy: lust for life and much more - uniquely Mandalorian word, meaning the enjoyment of each day and the determination to seek and grab every possible experience, as well as surviving to see the next day - hanging onto life and relishing it. An understandable state of mind/ emotion for a warrior people. Closely related to the words for live, hunt and stay safe - and, of course *oya*. All from the same root.  
> Mando’ade: Children of Mandalore  
> aruetiise: Outsiders  
> vod’ika: Younger sibling  
> vod’ad: sibling's child  
> alor: Chief  
> Buir: Parent  
> LaarSenaar: SongBird  
> Haatyc or'arue jate'shya ori'sol aru'ike nuhaatyc: Better one big enemy that you can see than many small ones that you can't. (Mandalorian proverb.)  
> cyar’ika: Sweetheart  
> Cyare: Beloved  
> skraan’ur: Cook  
> Kurs’ika: Wolfcub  
> ad’ika: little one, child  
> osi’yaim: Useless, despicable person  
> Ori’vod: Older sibling  
> al’verde: Commander  
> al’baar’ur: Doctor  
> Oya Manda: Expression of Mandalorian solidarity and perpetuity: emotional and assertive.


	32. Every food chain has its acme

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time to go collect some kiddos. 
> 
> Everything will go without a hitch. 
> 
> Totally.
> 
> Content note for child death. It's not graphic, but it's there.

Jha’iil contemplated his treasure trove of stuffies. He had quite a few. A frog, a few banthas, his very favorite mythosaur, a loth cat, a taun taun that his ba’vodu grumbled about every time she saw it, a shriekhawk, and a strill. He had so many stuffies, and he didn’t really understand why his buir seemed to be happy to give him more, but sometimes Jha’iil would put them into a pile and sleep on them. 

His ba’vodu would also sneak him a new one occasionally, when she could find one. They were nice to sleep with, and made him feel better even when his people had to be gone. It had been perfectly reasonable to sneak some in when his ba’vodu was sleeping when they joined the Covert on Jelucan. She had been alone and lonely and very sad, and stuffies made him feel better, so they would make her feel better, too. 

Lypatri was also alone and lonely, and she didn’t have a stuffie of her own. He had many. Which one would she like the best? 

There were twenty five of them. For a warehouse full of mercenaries, twenty five Mandalorian warriors should be overkill, but they hadn’t known what they were walking into, and with a large number of children…. More was better. 

Plus this was the first time the Nevarro and Samaki Tribes had fought together. They had trained together, some, but this would be a high-stakes shakedown, and Ademe was privately concerned. The Nevarro warriors were well trained, and stealthy- all of them were going in the back alleys. Their experiences in the sewers of Nevarro made them uniquely suited for that job. A few of the Samaki people would be with them- Kata and her tools, Atriu, so she could help with the children, a few others. 

The bulk of the Samaki warriors would handle the front assault. Cara, the aruetii woman, would find a spot to snipe from. The al’baar’ur and Roccan would wait with the main ship for casualties. They were as prepared as they possibly could be.

If only the lives of children weren’t at stake. 

Ademe had sent a message back to Samaki, letting them know the numbers they were looking at, and letting them know about the assault on Taris. She strongly suspected that Rima would send Solde and a few others to see if they could figure out what happened- if anyone was looking for those children, they must be frantic.

Cuan watched Teryn worriedly. She was anxiously going through one of the medkits, muttering to herself, pointing, as was her habit. Tabor had been sent with the rest of the Nevarro people, so he could evacuate anyone who needed it, and Roccan and another medic were with the frontal assault team. Ademe had asked more questions about the layout of the warehouse until Teryn got frustrated and snapped that she’d told them everything she could. 

He wanted to be able to touch and soothe and comfort, but she was so prickly and on edge that it wouldn’t help, and she’d been  _ very clear _ about not wishing to be touched. He knew that the only way to help her was to let her work through it, and let her do her job and maybe, just maybe, vent her rage on a couple of mercs, but that didn’t mean it was easy. 

She turned to look at him, and gave him a small, tense smile. He gave a nod back. It would do.

On the ship, Teryn, Roccan, and another medic sat apart from the rest of the warriors- they would end up waiting on the ship until they were needed. Roccan took a deep settling breath. “I haven’t done much combat work like this. Usually they make it back to the Covert before I get them.” 

Teryn gave him a bit of a smile. “If you can forget that these are your vode, the challenge is kind of fun.”

“Was it easier during the war?”

“Sometimes. At least with us, they’re all trained for it. They know what they’re doing. With the Alliance… some were trained, most were just a bunch of angry people trying to make a difference. Fisher people, farmers, miners... and they….” she sighed. “They would just end up shredded.” 

  
  


Din piloted the Razor Crest to a lot filled with rubble not too far from the warehouse. Ord Mantell had been under Empire control, and there were a number of places that had been blown up by insurgents during the war. They had identified a few places that would do as staging areas, and luck was with them- the closest one could take the Razor Crest and the Talon, which meant, assuming all went according to the plan, they could get the children loaded up as quickly as possible. 

Carefully, the group made their way through the maze of alleys, Ordo marking the path back to the ships so they could find it at speed. Paz signaled to Ademe that they were in position.

Everyone was silent, waiting for the signal from the frontal assault team. Din methodically checked his weapons; he had gotten into the habit when he had the breathing space to do it. Blaster. Rifle. Jetpack. Vibroblade. Whistling Birds. Everything was in its place and ready. 

He saw Paz check the connections on his repeating rifle, Kata pat the tools on her belt. She’d switched out her combat gauntlets for lighter gloves that gave her more dexterity. Atriu was just vibrating with excitement- he could remember his first operation very well, and he’d vibrated in just the same way. Tabor readjusted the medpack he had- Din had watched him open it up and mutter to himself everything that was in it while pointing, just as he’d watched his vod’ika do countless times. Ordo just waited, quiet, calm. Din knew very well that Ordo’s quietness was misleading- he’d seen the man explode into a flurry of violence as soon as the time was right. 

They all had the general bearing of where they were going on their HUDs, and a potentially accurate map of the alleys that would lead them to the back wall of the warehouse. The map didn’t indicate any entrances back there, but that’s what they had charges for. Teryn and Cara had given a rough estimate of the size of the building, and based on the available maps, there was a large space between the back wall and the rooms holding the children. A charge blowing a hole the back wall was unlikely to injure them. 

They just needed the signal from the front team. 

The Samaki ship approached the landing pads of the warehouse from a blind side. There was a ship in one spot. 

“Al’baar’ur, was that there before?” 

Teryn looked out the viewscreen and frowned. “No…”

Ademe nodded. “Blow it up.”

“Wait! What if they have more kids in there?” 

The pilot hesitated, and Ademe gave a grunt of frustration. “Can you disable its guns?” 

The pilot made a dubious noise. “My guns aren’t that precise.” 

“Tadasco! Go out and take out that thing’s guns and engines.” Ademe nodded to a carton of charges. “Make it quick, vod. Mosca! Cover him!” 

Cuan nodded and went for the hatch, sparing a look at Teryn. Her eyes were wide and worried, but he watched as her face turned hard and flinty. She gave him a nod.  _ Go fuck ‘em up, Kurs’khaded.  _

He nodded back.  _ I will, cyare, don’t worry. _

He flew out of the side hatch, followed by Mosca. Cuan dropped down to the trafficker’s ship and tossed a couple charges at the guns. The side door was flung open and a handful of mercs ran out, shooting wildly. Cuan evaded them almost lazily Mosca opened fire on them cackling. Two went down before the door slammed closed. 

The ship swung around the landing pads and began firing on the main doors, then opened its side hatch. Three more Samaki warriors flew out, armed to the teeth. The pilot sent the Nevarro group on the ground the signal to go.

The ship landed on the pad, ground weapons poised at the blasted open doors. Cara climbed out of a hatch on the top of the ship with a sniper rifle and took her position, waiting to pick off anyone who showed their nose outside. 

Cuan felt a savage joy when he saw the mercs swarming out to see what had blown a hole in their front door.  _ Fucking idiots _ , he thought, opening fire. They stole and terrorized children, they killed Mando’ade, and Teryn was so rattled by what she had seen there that she was… He snatched one by the throat and flew up to drop him in the midst of a bunch of other mercs. 

“Tadasco! Stop playing and fucking do your job!” Adame snapped over comms. He swooped down and mowed down another line, as pot shots from Cara took out a few more. 

As the initial shock of the assault wore off, the mercs stopped swarming out of the bombed entrances, and took up positions behind the rubble. “I see at least ten of them hiding, but there are some thick walls in there none of my sensors can penetrate.” called Ademe. 

Cuan nodded. “Take ‘em out?”

“Take ‘em out.” 

  
  


In the back of the building, Paz received the signal and nodded at Din. Din slid through the shadows, slapped two charges on the wall, and ducked back around the corner. Atriu peeped around him to see what was happening, and without missing a beat, Din hauled her back. 

“Wait.”

She made a mildly disgusted noise that was lost in the explosion, then they charged in. 

  
  


Ademe had set up a display for Teryn and Roccan to watch the assault through everyone’s heads up displays. It was disorienting at first -an overwhelming amount of information to quickly sift through- and Teryn was out of practice with it. With effort, she tamped down the instinct to focus only on Din and Cuan. Her attention needed to be on everyone. 

They watched as the Nevarro team charged into the back of the warehouse and picked off a handful of shocked and surprised mercs. Din and Paz went for the youngest children. That made sense, Teryn thought. They were holding the most kids there, and Paz would be able to carry five small ones without breaking a sweat. 

Ordo went into the room that held the Mandalorian children, followed by a few of the others. The look of relief and savage joy on their faces when they saw that someone had come for them was palpable, and something that Teryn would remember for the rest of her life. 

She watched Kata wait for one of the rooms with collared children to be cleared. Atriu was with her, and looking around, then Teryn saw her pause and focus on something under the stairs. Atriu stepped forward just as the dark haired woman -the one that had helped Lypatri escape- charged forward and grabbed up a blaster dropped by one of the mercs. There was no audio, but Teryn and Roccan could see her screaming and shooting. Atriu and Kata scattered and then, through Atriu’s HUD, Teryn saw the woman pulling up short in shock.

“They’re here for you, figure it out,” muttered Teryn. Roccan nodded tensely. 

The woman looked wildly at Kata and Atriu, and Kata held out her hands like she was telling her to calm down, and then everyone focused on the rooms with the children. The woman charged into the room with the ten aruetiise kids that were collared, holding the blaster like one trained for it. 

“You’re right about her,” Roccan muttered. “Does she think we’re going to leave the aruetiise behind?” 

Teryn shrugged. 

Paz and Din hauled the youngest out, and once they were on their way back to the ships with two other warriors, Teryn switched her attention to the frontal assault. 

It was… going. Cara was cheerfully picking off anyone who showed their head,, and inside, the six warriors were working at taking out everyone they could see. The guard room by the side entrance was reduced to rubble and the few mercs that Teryn could see looked overwhelmed and terrified. 

Good.

Back down in the holding rooms, Kata was working feverishly at getting the collars off the Mando kids. Some of the older ones that had been freed had scavenged blasters and were covering Kata while she worked. That meant that Ordo and the others could get up and take out the guards on the catwalks. 

One the far side of the room, the lift door opened, and a pile of mercs poured out. Kata glanced at them but returned her focus back to the collar in front of her- she only had two more of the Mando kids before she could work on the others. Atriu took a position in front of Kata and waved for the kids that had their restraints removed to run out. Most of them did, but one kid charged at the mercs. 

Ordo turned to see the kid, teeth bared, take a blaster shot directly to the chest. Teryn and Roccan looked at each other, knowing that a blast like that, unarmored, was not survivable. In the warehouse, there was a shocked pause on all sides, and then the warriors all opened fire on the mercs. 

Kata got the last Mandalorian kid freed and called for Atriu to cover their retreat. Ordo flew down and picked up the body of the kid, then tossed a charge at the lift to prevent it from being used again. 

Out in the back, Atriu watched Kata take a breath before moving toward the center room, Atriu following. Tabor ran over to Ordo to look at the kid he held, and Teryn watched his shoulders sag in defeat, just as she knew would be the case. There was nothing that could be done at that point. Nothing. A bacta tank can’t revive the dead. Ordo handed the kid over to one of the others to bring back to the ships along with the rest of the Mando kids, and charged in after Kata and Atriu. 

The remaining warriors had gone to secure the middle room- getting the littlest out of harm’s way as soon as possible was paramount, and cold-blooded as it was, Mandalorian kids could cause a great deal of chaos given the opportunity. By necessity that left the collared group of ten for last. 

Two of the warriors had gone in and one was down, groaning in pain when Atriu made it in. Teryn hadn’t even seen what had happened in there- everything was happening all at once. She and Roccan both frowned at the screen, trying to suss out what the injury was. 

Tabor commed to ask what he should do- the room wasn’t secure and there were children that needed attention. Teryn hesitated only a fraction of a second before telling him to stay with the children. 

All of the remaining children were huddled in a corner, with the dark-haired woman placed in front of them, holding off mercs with her stolen blaster. Teryn could see through the feeds from Kata and Ordo that she was starting to falter- she wasn’t putting weight on one leg and her arm was pressed to her side. But she was still standing. 

“We’ll need to get them both here as soon as we can.” Roccan muttered. Teryn nodded, frowning. 

“Somebody bring those two up to medical!” she bellowed in the comms. They knew that there were children that needed attention, but Tabor could handle relatively minor things, and the downed warrior and the woman had visible injuries that needed to be seen to as soon as possible. Somebody managed to pick up the warrior and Teryn went to receive him. Roccan kept an eye on the monitors. 

The downed warrior made it in with the help of Ordo and another woman from Samaki. Teryn immediately got to work, pulling off his armor. 

“It looks like things are going okay from up here.” 

“We’ve got almost all of them out. The scrapper is working on the collars of the last batch.” Ordo said, leaning against the bulkhead, taking a breath.

“Can they just pull them out? Take the collars off once we get them?”

“She says no. They’re designed to keep them on the premises.” the other warrior snarled. “Fuckin’ pigs.” She and Ordo went back to the battle.

Teryn nodded, hands making quick assured movements. The man she was working on had taken a blaster to the shoulder at close range, and his armor didn’t block all of it. The most obvious problem was the broken clavicle, but the burns were the worst of it. Close impact blaster wounds were nasty and prone to infection. 

She frowned at the bacta tank. It was possible that someone else would need it more, and she couldn’t make the decision without a full triage. She slathered a bacta burn gel on his wounds and covered them. With a lot of luck, he’d survive to brag about the scars. 

Roccan ran down. “They got the last kids out, we’re going to meet up back outside the city.”

“They get the woman?”

Roccan hesitated for just a split second, and nodded. “Ademe’s bringing her to us now.” He looked down at the man Teryn was working on. “Are you… going to take off his helmet?”

She blinked at him. Truthfully, it hadn’t occurred to her to even consider doing that. And the thought of taking someone else’s helmet off, even when she could, when it was allowed and expected, that was still not something she was prepared to do. Even in death, it was for the family to remove the helmet. If there was no family, only then would it be an option. She exhaled slowly, and held up her gloved hands. “Can you?” 

Roccan pulled off the man’s helmet. They were in the medbay, not visible from the outside at all. For him, that would have been the first thing he did. He sighed- there was still a lot for him to learn. For both of them to learn.

Ademe came into their makeshift medbay, carrying the woman. She was unconscious and the collar had been removed. Teryn frowned at the raw sores around her neck- she’d been wearing it for a while, some of the sores were infected, and she was painfully thin. She nodded at another table. “There.” 

Ademe commed for the pilot to take them up, “There’s going to be more.” 

Teryn looked behind her. Cara had hopped down from the top of the ship, but no one else had come in. “Where are the others?” 

Ademe paused as they lifted off. “They went down to help and are going to the meeting point. We’ll get the other wounded there.” 

“How many?” 

Again, the pause. “A few major. There were more of them than expected.”

“Who?”

“Focus, al’baar’ur. Get them stable.” Ademe went up to the cockpit.

Teryn sent a worried look to Roccan, who wouldn’t meet her eyes. She started to get a growing feeling of dread, but Ademe was right: she needed to focus on the job in front of her. She gestured for Roccan to start helping her with the woman. 

Her hair was shaggy and messy, and she was filthy- manda only knew the last time she’d been able to get clean. As the ship took off, Teryn cut away the ragged shirt, nodding to herself. This had been part of the woman’s undergear. More proof, if she needed it. Her torso was covered with old bruises, and a larger, spreading one. Cracked and broken ribs, probably from a kick- malnutrition would have weakened the bones. The med scan showed that there was some internal bruising that they needed to keep an eye on, but no surgical intervention was necessary at that point. 

Roccan was quickly bandaging a grazed blaster shot on her leg. “She needs fluids.” He went to get them set up, and Teryn cleaned and bandaged the sores around her neck. As far as her injuries went, they weren’t bad. It was whatever happened when the woman woke up that worried Teryn more. 

They had just finished dealing with her when the ship landed. Teryn gestured for the medic to keep an eye on their two patients and ran out. 

They were in a wide mesa well outside of the city. They’d be able to see anyone approaching, and while they were visible, Ademe and Paz had agreed that of the available options, this was the best for them. They’d be able to land all three ships close together and transfer people quickly as needed. 

The Razor Crest had landed, side gangplank opening. Teryn waited anxiously, waiting to see who needed help. Ordo came out, helping a limping Kata with a smoking boot, who Teryn could hear was swearing up a storm. Teryn allowed a small smile of relief- if she had the energy to be angry, she wasn’t that bad off. 

“Kids?” 

“The ones we have in there aren’t in too bad a shape, nothing we can’t handle on the way back. The baar’ur is with the Talon.” Ordo said as they hobbled past. 

Teryn turned back to the Razor Crest and frowned again. There appeared to be a whole mess of kids there, each wrapped in a blanket, and most of them were sucking down water pouches. Good. She resisted the urge to comm Din or Cuan- they needed to be able to focus on their jobs, and she’d see for herself that they were fine soon enough.

The Talon came into view, and she let out a breath. Most of their people were on that ship. Most of the children were on that ship. Cuan was on the ship- he had to be, or he’d have been out of the Razor Crest already. She glanced at the Razor Crest again, just in time to see Paz climbing down from the cockpit.

Paz, not Din. 

Teryn took a deep breath, feeling a small tremor of fear.  _ I just got him back. Where is he? _

The Talon landed, and Roccan fell in beside her. “I’m not sure how many, but we can handle this.” 

Teryn nodded, letting out a slow breath when the first person she saw exiting was Din. He was standing. He appeared unhurt. He stopped when he saw her, and she couldn’t read his posture at all. He was pulling a hover stretcher, Tabor next to it. 

With a man in dark red armor on it. Her Kurs’khaded. 

  
  


After a great deal of contemplation, Jha’iil had finally decided that Lypatri needed his precious mythosaur. His buir could make another one appear, he thought. Lypatri was going to be a Mandalorian, just like him, and Mandalorians needed mythosaurs. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long! I was on vacation last week, and also _this was really hard_. I have maps. I have charts of who was where. I have a timeline. I would have had little army men to plan the action, but Amazon couldn't figure out how to deliver it to our AirBnB. 
> 
> Once this chapter and the next are up, I'll post pictures of the visual aids on my tumblr, magsgotswags. 
> 
> Mando'a translations
> 
> ba’vodu: Parent's sibling  
> buir: Parent  
> aruetii: Outsider, foreigner (plural Aruetiise)  
> al’baar’ur: Doctor  
> vode: comrades  
> vod’ika: younger sibling  
> Kurs’khaded: wolf  
> cyare: beloved  
> Mando’ade: Children of Mandalore  
> manda: the collective soul or heaven - the state of being Mandalorian in mind, body and spirit - also supreme, overarching, guardian-like  
> baar’ur: Medic


	33. A blight upon the darkness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For the medics, the battle never really ends.

He’d been hurt before. He’d even been seriously injured before. 

But this time, all he could think of was _her_. Frowning as she worked. Pulling away from the first time he tried to touch her, scowling in mistrustful confusion. Leaning into him, hesitant, at first, then with more comfort and trust. Touching her hair, her beautiful, glorious hair. Singing. Smiling. In his arms, relaxed and safe and almost happy. 

He saw the future and the past all at once. Glimpses of her reading with Lypatri. Watching the Wolf Cub and her green bean vod’ad playing in the snow. An evening with the entire family, playing games and listening to stories and songs. Racing Arkil. In a pile with the other children. 

And through it all, her. Her soul tucked against his. 

_I’m sorry ner kar’ta. I meant to come back._  
  


The upper level response seemed to have been “throw everything at once, and then be shocked when that didn’t work,” which, for a few well-trained and angry Mandalorians, was hardly a challenge at all. 

Cara was right in her observations, Cuan thought. These guys didn’t go for subtlety at all. They just assumed numbers would win, but they’d been going after children mostly. A well-armed force determined to fuck them up was a bit beyond their scope. 

Darting in and out to pick off the defenders one by one was fun. It felt good to put his skills to use- they’d been hiding for too long. Mosca and Cuan both paused as their sensors picked up something: someone yelling frantically in a room off to the right. Cara hadn’t seen what was in that room, but from the sound of it, someone was trying to direct a defense. 

Well. Fuck that shit. 

Cuan and Mosca went to the line of doors and took up positions on either side of the one they could hear the shouting behind. The shouting took on a new tenor of fear, and Mosca nodded at a camera up in the corner. Cuan smirked. “Let him see what’s coming for him.”

He kicked the door open -it wasn’t even locked, the fucking amatuers- and a stocky man with a red beard backed up against the wall in alarm, sputtering. Cuan stalked forward and snatched the comm unit out of his hands. 

“Al’verde, looks like we found someone who might be useful. Want me to bring him in?” Mosca asked over comms.

“Do it.” 

Mosca grabbed the man by the scruff of the neck and the waistband of his pants and hauled him off while Cuan turned his attention to the screens. The upper levels were mostly clear- there didn’t seem to be many left, or a good way to get the mercs left in the lower level above, certainly not with two of the three lifts bombed out. But… he frowned. 

“Al’verde, there’s a whole bunch about to swarm out into the warehouse.” He squinted at the screens. “Looks like Kata is about halfway through.”

“She says she has to remove the collars before they can get the kids out,” Ademe said. “Is it clear up here?” 

“Yes, although…” He squinted again at one of the monitors. “Looks like they’re bringing someone up… and...shit, the woman is injured and they need help.”

Ademe agreed. “Several people are on the ships with the kids we’ve already gotten out. Take everyone up here and go help them.” 

Cuan took the rest of the upper level team and headed for the battle below. 

Din watched Teryn let out a small sigh of relief at the sight of him, then steeled himself for what he knew would happen next. He’d brought wounded warriors home before, but to actually see the realization hit- that was something he wasn’t used to. The color drained from her face and she swayed a little before she took a deep breath. 

“He’s alive.” Din walked forward, wanting to go slow, but knowing that seconds counted in this game. She swallowed and looked down, trying to be clinical- to see what the damage was and figure out how to fix it instead of the broken body of the stars that had become the guiding point in her life. 

Scorch marks on the armor- they all had that, Dislocated shoulder, easy. But the worst by far was the rebar that had entered his abdomen and gone up into his chest. She exchanged a look with Din. This was a very similar injury to the one that had killed Arkil not that many months ago. She nodded to herself. You didn’t often get a re-do of these things. 

_If you can forget that the body belongs to your cyare, your kar’ta, then the challenge is kind of fun._

She looked at Tabor. “How many others?”

“One other bad and a bunch of the kids have injuries. Nothing major, except for...” Tabor faltered, talking about the kid that had taken the blaster to the chest.

Teryn nodded, mind already racing ahead to what she needed to do. “I saw. Bring them in, we’ll get started.” 

Din sighed to himself. The only outward sign of what she must be feeling was the slightest tremor in her hand as she took over pushing the hoverstretcher. It was patently unfair that the one person who might be able to save him was the one person who shouldn’t have to. 

“The universe isn’t as unfair as all that, Bu?” he muttered to himself and turned to the Razor Crest. He had seen Cuan go down, carrying one of the last kids- there had been a huge surge of remaining mercs that came pouring out from beyond the lifts and the Mandalorians had gone for a hasty retreat. They’d realized that there was one child that had hidden themselves behind some rubble and Cuan had gone back for them. 

Cuan had said he was “passable” at Rising Phoenix. He was actually pretty good. He’d been zipping along, but at least one of the mercs wasn’t a former stormtrooper. He took a shot to his jetpack, and he and the kid had gone down. 

He folded himself to protect the kid as much as possible, but there had been rubble and the rebar, and there was no way to avoid it. The kid had been terrified, bruised, and scraped up, but not seriously hurt. The same could not be said for Cuan. Din had been right behind Tabor, covering the baar’ur as he feverishly worked to figure out how to get the man onto the ship and back to experienced hands. 

They needed to shuffle everyone around and split the group to make the trip back to Samaki and they needed to do it as quickly as possible. Wounded in the Samaki ship. Most of the Mando kids didn’t need immediate attention, so they would all be able to stay stay together. Paz had piloted the Razor Crest while Din helped Tabor with Cuan, but Din would take over for the trip back. Much as part of him wanted to be able to support Teryn, he had a job to do and so did she. 

Teryn ripped her hood off as soon as she got into the ship. She had to focus. She had to set it all aside and work the problem in front of her. She had resources, thank the stars- even if the other medics needed to deal with the other injuries, she had supplies, and light, and equipment…. 

She looked at the bacta tank. 

There was the man with the blaster burns. He could use it, too. It would be... questionable to use it for Cuan just because… she shook her head. First things first. He needed to be stabilized. He needed things to be put back together before the bacta could do its job. 

Roccan came in. “Do you need help?” She looked at him blankly for a second, and he nodded down. “I’ll take it off.” He reached for Cuan’s helmet and Teryn almost stopped him. This was private. This was intimate. She’d never taken it off of him; what gave this shabuir the right… She turned away, unable to watch his face- his perfect, smirking, stupid face- come into view, gray and bloodless. 

She turned back with a tray once she heard Roccan put his helmet down. “I’ve got this. Deal with the others.” 

Roccan looked down and felt himself blanch beneath his helmet. “I can send someone to help you with the armor.” 

“Send my hibir in.” She said it quietly, emotionlessly, frowning at her scanner. 

“He-”

“NOW.” 

Roccan turned and left. He told himself he wasn’t fleeing but, deep in his soul, he knew he was. However brilliant and talented and capable she might be, he wasn’t sure if she could manage that injury. 

He knew it was beyond _his_ skills.

Tabor came in- hesitantly. She didn’t even look up at him, already working on getting Cuan’s armor off. “I just need you to help with this part, then you can go back to what you were doing.” He nodded, and they carefully stripped him.

The good news, Teryn thought, was that the rebar was keeping him from bleeding out. The bad news was that extracting it was going to take speed, skill, and luck. Well. Skill and speed she had. All she needed to do was get him to the point that the bacta tank could take over. 

She took a deep breath, and put her hand on Cuan’s cheek and stroked his lips with her thumb. “K’arkaanir. Gedet’ye. I need you to fight. I’ll do my part, you need to do yours.” Then she got to work. 

Kata’s foot wasn’t in terrible shape, but the boot was a total loss, and cutting the melted bits off hadn’t been fun for anyone. Ordo had let her squeeze his hand and shout abuse at him so the medic could do the job, which she would appreciate -later. 

The kids that needed the most attention were mostly scared and silent with shock. Once they’d been reassured that they were being brought somewhere safe, a number had fallen asleep. 

“Are you going to bring me back to my mommy?” One kid asked Paz, in the hold of the Razor Crest.

“You have a mommy?” Paz asked and when the kid nodded, he’d sighed. Maybe some of the street pickings had gotten slim and they’d moved on to straight kidnapping. “Do you know what planet you lived on?”

“Corellia.”

“Okay. We’ll help you find your mom.” 

Roccan, Tabor, and the other medic came in just as she was finishing up. “How is he?”

“He needs the tank.”

Roccan nodded slowly. “What about Cormu?” He nodded to the man that had first been brought in. “Does he need the tank?”

Teryn exhaled. “He… could use it.”

“Can he live without it?”

“Maybe.”

“Can Tadasco live without it?”

“No.” She kept herself calm. “It’s your tank. It’s your call.” Roccan appreciated that she was putting this decision on him. Both of them knew she couldn’t be truly objective, and even if she could… it was better to have the person less emotionally involved make the call. 

Not that Roccan wasn’t emotionally involved. Even though the Samaki tribe was considerably larger than the Nevarro tribe, it was still a small group of people. He drummed his fingers as he considered the situation. “Will he live with it?” 

“Maybe.” 

Roccan glanced between the two, then at Tabor and the other medic. “Tadasco.” 

Teryn let out a breath she hadn’t been aware she was holding. They got the breathing mask on Cuan and were about to lower him into the tank when she stopped them. “I need a minute.” 

Roccan made a noise, and Tabor started to hustle him out of the room. If his al’baar’ur needed a minute then she would get a minute. 

She touched Cuan’s face. “You have to come back to me. I need you to… I need you to fight. We don’t know if I can follow you, even if I did swear again… and you can’t go where I won’t be able to find you. I won’t allow it. So you stay. You fight. And _you come back to me, Cuan Tadasco.”_ She steeled herself, and pressed her forehead to his, letting out an agonized shuddering breath, before pulling back and wiping at her eyes. 

“Okay,” she called. “He’s ready.”   
  


Din stayed up in the cockpit after they entered hyperspace. There were enough people down with the children in the hold, there was no reason to add to the crush down there. Cara was also there with him, quiet. 

As operations went, that truly hadn’t gone badly. The teams had worked well together. Casualties were higher than expected but given the intel they had, not entirely unsurprising. Two critically wounded, at least five more with moderate to minor injuries. 

Losing the kid was hard, and Din hoped beyond hope that they would be able to find some of their people to tell them what happened. The worst thing he could possibly imagine would be not knowing what happened to Jha’iil. 

He sighed. Cara had sent the rented ship back to Dantooine, and he’d managed a quick message to Zake just saying that it was over and he’d send more later. 

“Is he going to make it?” Cara asked, quietly. 

“I don’t know.” 

“It looked bad…” 

“It is.” Din fiddled with the ball on the shifter lever. He’d managed to reclaim it from Jha’iil’s crib before they left. “If anyone can deal with it, it’s her.” 

Cara glanced down at her feet at a box that had been tucked under the consol. “What’s that?”

“Stuff he picked up on Navarro and Dantooine. For their Foundling.” 

Unable to resist, Cara peeked through it. A brightly colored blanket, some toys, some books, some clothes… “....oh.” A winter hat, with wolf ears. “Oh, shit.” 

Teryn had walked away from the bacta tank and gone from kid to kid, checking them over, even the sleeping ones. Tabor had stayed right behind her, making notes and handing over bandages and medications almost before she asked for them. 

Teryn had gotten to the last kid they’d pulled onto the medical ship, checked Kata’s foot, and turned to find something -anything- to do when she saw Atriu hovering near the cabin with the bacta tank in it. Teryn swayed a little, then took a steadying breath and turned to Tabor. 

“Let me know if the woman or Cormu wakes up.” Tabor nodded, and she went over to Atriu. 

Atriu’s helmet was still on- everyone had their helmets on except for Cuan and Cormu- but the set of her shoulders spoke volumes. She was terrified. “Is he going to die?”

“I hope not.” Teryn put a hand on her shoulder. “I did everything I could. It’s up to him now.” 

“I don’t want him to die.” Atriu’s voice quivered. “Is this the part where you say he’s a fighter?”

“Yeah.” Teryn said quietly. 

“Does it help?”

Teryn shrugged helplessly. On some level, it did. On many, many, many others… not in the least. _Your fights are mine_. She looked down at Atriu and gave her a nudge to pull her out of the thought spiral she was in. “Thank you for looking out for the Foundling before you left.”

Atriu nodded and gave the bacta tank a last look. “She’s a good kid. You’re gonna have to keep an eye on her, though. And maybe don’t let her use the old explosives. Not yet.” 

Teryn managed to not laugh, but it was hard. “We’ll keep that in mind.” 

Ademe looked down at the red-haired merc that Mosca had brought back. He was in restraints, wrists and ankles. And she had put a collar on him, just because she could and she had a petty streak the size of a parsec. This asshole was going to put restraint collars on children? He could wear one that was just slightly too small for him. 

“We’re going to have some questions for you, demagolka. And you will answer them.” Ademe crouched down and took the merc’s chin in her hand. “And then we’ll decide what’s to be done with you.” 

While Teryn had been working on Cuan, Roccan managed to find a private corner for the woman to be moved to. If she woke up before they reached the Covert, he had been pretty sure that privacy would be a good idea. 

The monitor beeped to let them know that she’d woken up, but the only real change was that her heart rate had suddenly skyrocketed. Teryn immediately went over to where she was and knocked before going in. 

The woman stared with wide eyes, with dark circles underneath them. She was already looking a bit less peaked with the fluids, and Teryn gave her a minute to take it in. The woman frowned, taking in Teryn’s bare head and unmistakably Mandalorian armor. 

“Where did you steal that?”

“I didn’t. It’s mine.” Teryn walked in slowly, hands spread. “You’re safe. Gar morut’yc.” 

The woman jerked at the sound of Mando’a, then looked around warily. “Where am I?” 

“You’re on a Mandalorian ship. On our way to a Covert.” 

“I thought I saw… Mandalorians. They came,” she said, almost incredulously.

“We did.” Teryn took another step forward. “Can I check your bandages?” 

The woman reached up and touched her neck, closing her eyes when she realized that the pressure she felt wasn’t the collar, but bandages. “Oh…”

“There’s some pressure sores. Some of them are infected and might scar a bit, but it’ll be okay.” Teryn took another slow step forward. “You also have some cracked and broken ribs, but they’ll heal. Minor blaster wound to your leg.” 

The woman nodded, still feeling her neck. 

“You gave a kid a mythosaur amulet a couple weeks ago. Told her to find a Mandalorian.”

“...She found him.” The woman held herself very still as Teryn checked the bandages, and nodded in satisfaction. Things were looking good. 

“She did.” Teryn tilted her head and asked, gently, “How long has it been?”

The woman looked at her, suddenly wary. 

“It’s been... “ Teryn frowned, counting. “Over eleven years, for me.” 

“...since…?”

“Since my helmet was taken.” Teryn gave her a sympathetic smile. “I could tell as soon as I saw you. I told them we were not leaving you there. Not when you risked everything to save them.” 

The woman inhaled sharply. “You were… the buyer. With the coat.” At Teryn’s nod, the woman’s forehead wrinkled as she sorted through everything. “You… you’re dar’manda.”

“Yes.”

“They….” The woman frowned and averted her eyes. “Why did they let you…?”

“It’s a long story and you need rest.” Teryn stepped forward again, holding a hypospray. “And maybe some pain medication?“ 

The woman nodded, and Teryn felt privately relieved that she wasn’t going to have to argue about the value of pain management for once. She gave the woman the dose and watched as her eyes began to drift closed. “What will happen to me?” 

“We’ll bring you back to the Covert and let you heal, and… you can decide from there.” 

“They’ll let me?” Her voice was quiet and hesitant. 

“I will make them.” Teryn kept her voice quiet, but firm. “Is there anyone… is there anyone we can contact for you?” 

“No. My tribe is dead.” The woman’s eyes closed completely. Teryn pulled the blanket up, checked the fluids, and left. They still had a few hours to go before they got to Samaki and there was nothing left for her to do. 

She went back to the bacta tank, and rested her forehead against it. Everyone was either asleep or resting. No one needed anything, and while she could -should- take the quiet time to sort through the mess left behind by the chaos of dealing with the wounded… she just couldn't bring herself to care. 

He was still hanging on, and the readings looked… okay. Cuan’s armor and clothing had been stacked neatly nearby, and she picked up his cloak and buried her nose into it. Spices and smoke and jetpack fumes and something indescribably him. 

She curled up into a ball on the floor in front of the tank, tucking the cloak under her cheek. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm... kinda sorry? No I'm not. 
> 
> Are by the amazing SRed, who is mad at me.
> 
> You'll be able to see the lists and maps and charts I did for this battle on my tumblr, https://magsgotswags.tumblr.com
> 
> Mando'a translations
> 
> ner kar’ta: my heart, my stars  
> vod'ad: sibling's nephew  
> al'verde: commander  
> cyare: beloved  
> shabuir: extreme insult - *jerk*, but much stronger  
> hibir: student  
> K’arkaanir: fight (command)  
> Gedet’ye: please  
> al’baar’ur: doctor  
> demagolka: someone who commits atrocties, a real-life monster, a war criminal - from the notorious Mandalorian scientist of the Old Republic, Demagol, known for his experiments on children, and a figure of hate and dread in the Mando psyche  
> Gar morut’yc: You're safe  
> dar’manda: a state of not being Mandalorian - not an outsider, but one who has lost his heritage, and so his identity and his soul - regarded with absolute dread by most traditionall-minded Mando'ade


	34. Inside my heart there's a dying part that's always searching

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone comes home.

Taris was large and Solde wasn’t even sure where to start. “Looking for a transport,” but where would a group of desperate Mandalorians with kids do that? Taris was an ecumenopolis but huge swathes of it were wastelands or swamps. 

_Think, girl, think. There was a shootout less than two days ago. Someone has to know about it._ Solde turned her ship to the nearest dockyard. Dockworkers were the second biggest fucking gossips in the galaxy- after Mandalorians. 

  
  


To wake up requires having been asleep. 

Teryn hadn’t slept. Hadn’t slept since Dantooine. Didn’t expect to sleep….anytime soon, or possibly ever again. It was just hours and hours of obsessively going over everything she’d done, starting with what she had done for Cuan and then going back over every decision she’d made in her life. Was there a better choice along the line, anywhere along the line, that could have made for a better outcome? 

Did she do something that could kill him?

Tabor hesitantly came to let her know that they were about to drop out of hyperspace, wringing his hands and limping slightly. She frowned at him and he shrugged. “It’s nothing.” 

She rubbed her face. “I’ll take a look once we get everyone settled.” 

She got to her feet, stiff from having been lying on the floor. The readouts from the bacta tank were… she stared at them, trying to make sense of any of the numbers. 

“I thought I saw some caff in the mess- it’s cold, but I’ll get some for you.”

She shook her head. “I’ll get it. Any change in anyone?” She turned her attention to Cuan, floating gently in the bacta. Maybe his face looked less gray, maybe it was a little less drawn, but who could say if that was reality or just wishful thinking?

“We’ve changed the dressings on Cormu a few times. He hasn’t woken up yet but the healer is keeping him pretty sedated. And nothing from the woman… she’s still asleep.”

Teryn nodded, still looking at Cuan and trying to think of all the things that would need doing when they got on the ground. 

But her thoughts kept looping back to Tuathal and Lypatri. What was she going to tell them?

Everyone was awake when they landed. Everyone. The oldest Foundlings helped bring the newly freed children to the dorms where beds and food and baths were waiting for them. Every other child in the Covert had been employed to clear the landing fields of any debris- it made them feel useful and part of the business of receiving the teams home. 

Many people helped bring the wounded into the medbay. Ordo insisted on helping Kata, who insisted she didn’t _need_ help, she was just accepting it to make _him_ feel better. 

Lypatri had noticed a slight shift in tension when they got word that the ships were coming home. No one said anything to her, but Rima had given her a long, expressionless look when she’d come to tell Saojeme that everyone was on their way back. 

It made her nervous and she clutched the stuffed mythosaur that her small green cousin had given her. 

She snuck out from where the other children were being kept while they were unloading the ships and hid behind a tree to watch. She’d watch ships getting unloaded in dockyards before and this seemed a lot more organized. No yelling, just quick directions, and then, finally, she saw the exhausted face of the al’baar’ur. 

Lypatri started running towards her before remembering that she wasn’t even supposed to be there, but it was too late. Teryn had seen her and she took a deep breath before walking over. 

Lypatri clutched the mythosaur to her chest and looked up with wide eyes, and just as reported, no eyebrows. Teryn looked down for a long minute and then, chin trembling just a little, knelt down and pulled Lypatri into a hug. “I’m so glad you’re not hurt, ner Kurs’ika.” 

Lypatri started to cry. “I was afraid you wouldn’t w-w-want me.”

Teryn pulled back and looked down at Lypatri very seriously. “There’s nothing you can do that would make us not want you, cyar’ika.” 

“Really?” Lypatri snuffled into her sleeve. “Ba’buir said that Cuan was gonna be proud, but…” Lypatri looked around, and frowned. “Where is he?”

Teryn let out a breath. “He… he was injured.”

Lypatri’s eyes got big and even more scared. “Is he gonna be okay?”

“Oh, ad’ika…” Teryn took a deep, steadying breath. “I don’t know. He’s in the bacta tank right now.” Lypatri turned to look at the med bay, then back at Teryn, questioning. “After we get everything settled, if you want to, I can take you to see him. But someone in a bacta tank can look scary.” 

“I want to.” Lypatri set her jaw, clutching the mythosaur tighter. Teryn nodded. She hadn’t expected anything different. Not from this wolf cub. 

In the end, Teryn had sent her back to the creche where all the other children from the Covert were waiting to be collected. It was going to be hours, and _someone_ should get some sleep. 

Getting everyone settled had taken time. Cara helped with getting the weapons stowed, all the while being deeply impressed with the quality of the armory. The addition of 42 children meant a lot of work and it was a couple hours before Din was done with what he needed to do so he could go find Jha’iil. 

Unlike the other times that Din had come back, Jha’iil knew that it was important that he be patient. Tuathal and H’lava had both told him that his buir was coming home, but there were many others who needed help and that his buir would come find him as soon as he could. So he waited. 

He’d seen Lypatri sneak off and come back with a tearstained face. She’d gone to sit in a corner, so he went to sit with her. She eventually fell asleep and they waited together, until Din came. 

Din had expected that Jha’iil would come running when they landed and had been equal parts relieved and proud and a little bit disappointed when H’lava had told him that he’d agreed to wait until Din was done. And then, when Din arrived at the creche, Jha’iil still hadn’t come running. He was sitting next to a sleeping Lypatri, patting her hand. 

Din sighed. 

Jha’iil looked up and smiled, but stayed where he was. Din nodded. Cousins were important, so were vod’ade. “Hi, ad’ika.” 

“Su cuy, buir.” Jha’iil looked between Din and Lypatri before giving her hand another pat and toddling over to Din.

Din picked him up and cuddled him under his chin. “Did you give her your mythosaur?”

Jha’iil nodded. 

“That was nice of you, ad’ika.” 

“Aliit.” Jha’iil frowned as he tried to remember the word. “Ba’vodu’ad?”

“Yes, that’s what she is.” Din settled Jha’iil in the crook of one elbow and gave Lypatri a gentle shake. “Ad’ika, wake up; let's get you both to bed.” 

She blinked up at him, frowning. “Should I go back to Saojeme?”

“She’s helping with some of the new kids. You can bunk with him. Come on, let’s go.” Lypatri struggled to her feet, swaying. Din smiled to himself a bit as he scooped her up with the other arm. She rested her head on his shoulder and he carried both of them back to his quarters. He’d have to be a little careful with his helmet but at the moment, he couldn’t bring himself to care. 

  
  


Roccan tried to tell Teryn to go to sleep, but she refused. There was so much to do. 

The bacta tank with Cuan had been brought in, almost the last thing. Most people had gone off to other tasks and no one on the medical teams needed the added stress of having extra eyes on them while they moved the tank. Teryn thought he needed at least another five hours in it, if not more. 

Cormu’s dressings were being changed every hour. Roccan had taken his treatment over completely, as if that would absolve him of having made the choice to put Cuan in the tank instead of Cormu. It was still touch and go, and would be for a while. Putting him in the tank after they took Cuan out was an option, but they needed to get Cormu to that point. 

The woman had been put into a room with a call button, broth, water, clean clothes, and a full refresher. Teryn fully expected that she would likely sleep for a few days. Manda knew how long it had been since she’d truly been able to rest. 

Ademe and Paz had given their report to Rima and the Armorer. They still hadn’t heard anything back from Solde on Taris. Once the kids were rested and fed and clean and calmer, they’d start to work on figuring out who had homes they could go back to and how they would get them there. In the meantime, everyone needed to rest and to heal.

In the morning, they’d talk to the Mando’ade children and hopefully the Samaki and Nevarro Tribes would be able to help reunite the children with their own Tribe. Assuming there were any left. 

_“Arkil?”_

_“Ori’vod, what are you doing here? You don’t belong here. Not yet.”_

  
  


Teryn shouldn’t have been surprised to find Tuathal at the bacta tank. But everything felt like a numb surprise at the moment. Everything was as they had left it, but everything was so… wrong. He was standing at the tank with a hand pressed to it, eyes closed. 

“Ruug’alor?”

He turned. “Ad’ika.”

And that was enough to make her crack. She stumbled to him and started to cry. Everything she’d held in during the flight back, the surgery, the rounds, unloading… everything. She sank down to her knees and he followed -slowly- and put his arms around her. 

“Bu’ad’ika….” He murmured. “You need to rest.”

“I can’t. What if… what if he….” _What if he dies while I’m sleeping?_

“He won’t go where you can’t follow. Not without a fight. I know you gave him every chance you possibly could.” He stroked her hair. 

“What will I do?” She wailed. “How can I possibly…” _How can I possibly live in a galaxy without him in it?_

“You will live. You will give that child a soul, you will raise her, and you will live. We’ll all help you. You’re not alone. Not anymore.” 

_“I’m so tired.”_

_“I know, but you have to go back. They need you.”_

In the early morning, they decided to pull Cuan out of the tank. “Fourteen hours should be enough time,” Roccan had said, and Teryn had tiredly agreed. 

She couldn’t watch. Couldn’t watch as they pulled him out, as they washed the slimy bacta off, as they pulled the breathing tube from his throat. She went to go check on the woman, who was asleep, but some of the broth was gone and she was wearing the clean clothes. It didn’t appear that she’d had the stamina to try for a shower. Teryn had collected her discarded clothes, and decided that they should be washed, instead of burned. If they were the only thing the woman had left of her life…

...except it wasn’t. Lypatri still had the amulet. 

Teryn nodded to herself. She should arrange that meeting as soon as the woman was strong enough to stay awake for more than half a bowl of soup. She turned back to see Tabor, balancing on one leg and she grimaced to herself. She’d completely forgotten. “Hibir, sit.”

“No, it’s fine, don’t…” He sat down heavily on a stool she pushed at him. “It’s fine.”

“If it was fine, you’d be putting weight on it.” She sat down on the floor and carefully worked off his shin armor, then tried to pull off his boot. He let out a groan and she frowned, feeling the leg carefully. “It’s swollen. I’m going to need to cut the boot off.” 

“I don’t have another one. Can’t you…” 

She sighed and looked up at his anxious visor. “We can get you another pair of boots, but this one needs to come off now. Tell me why.” She pulled her vibroblade and carefully began to cut down the shaft of the boot. 

He sighed. “Because it could cut off circulation.”

“That’s right. When did you hurt it?”

“I’m not sure, sometime when we were getting the kids in…?”

“Do you remember how?” She cut his sock off and blew out her nose in sympathy. The whole leg was swollen and an angry red. “Ooof.” Gentle probing resulted in a hiss of pain. She shook her head. “You need to take care of yourself. You’re no good to anyone if you’re in so much pain you can’t walk.”

He tilted his head in an unspoken accusation, and she sighed. “Be better than me.” 

  
  


Teryn found Din, Jha’iil, and Lypatri eating breakfast and watched them for a while. Din was drinking some sort of smoothie, but, she noticed, it looked like it had real fruits in it, not just some gritty ration drink. Jha’iil was cheerfully inhaling some meat and fruit, but Lypatri… her wolf cub was moving food around on the plate, the mythosaur tucked at her side. 

Teryn knocked and stepped inside. “Vaar’tur.” 

“Did you sleep?” Din reached behind him and produced a thermos of caff that he’d prepared to bring over to her. 

“Of course not.” She took the thermos and sniffed. “Oh, this is nice.”

“We picked up some slightly more decent stuff while we were out.” She gave him a tremulous smile. He mentally kicked himself. He hadn’t had a chance to show her the carton of things Cuan had gotten for Lypatri yet, and he didn’t want to while the ad’ika was there. “How is he?”

“Out of the tank. We’ll see how it goes from here.” 

“But…?”

“We’ll see.” Teryn looked around for Cara, frowning. “Where’s….?”

“She’s still asleep. Knocked on her door; she threatened to bite me.” 

She looked down at Lypatri, who was looking small and anxious. “Would you like to go see him? I’m sure a visit from you will help.” Lypatri gave a tiny nod and hopped down from the table, snatching up the mythosaur. 

“Thank you for breakfast, ba’vodu,” she said to Din. He gave her a nod of acknowledgement and then nodded at Teryn, who was giving Lypatri a tired but proud smile. Feral the child might be, but she was also trying very hard to be unfailingly polite. 

As Teryn and Lypatri were walking back to the med bay, Lypatri looked up. "He doesn't talk much, does he?"

"No. You get used to it." 

In Cuan’s room, Lypatri froze at the door and peeped in. He was in a bed, with several monitors and tubes, softly beeping. He was at least breathing on his own. “You can come in, it’s okay.”

“What are all those?”

Teryn pointed to each wire and tube, and explained how they were keeping track of how well his heart was working, how well he was breathing, how things were progressing. “After someone has been in a bacta tank after a major injury, they need a lot of time to sleep and recover. We shouldn’t expect him to wake up before tomorrow.” 

“Will he?”

“I hope so.” 

Lypatri patted Cuan’s hand. “I hope so too.” She frowned to herself, considering, and then tucked the stuffed mythosaur under his arm. She looked up at Teryn. “I think he needs it more than I do. Can he hear me?” 

Teryn gave her a gentle squeeze on the shoulder. “I think so.” 

Lypatri leaned over, closer to Cuan’s head. “Feel better soon. Ba’buir says you can teach me how to make good bombs.” She lowered her voice. “He thinks Atriu might need some help, too.” She looked at Teryn for approval. 

Teryn was not going to smile. Not at all. She nodded. “I think that’ll help, ad’ika. If that doesn’t bring him back, nothing will.” 

She took Lypatri out and sent her back to the Herd. Many of the new kids were still resting, but a few were being let out to play. Teryn wondered how they were going to sort them out but decided she had quite enough to worry about. That was an Alor-level problem. 

Teryn looked at the edge of Cuan’s bed and, swallowing a whimper, curled up next to him, putting her hand on the curve of his jaw. Just for a few minutes. Then it was back to work. 

  
  


_“That Foundling of yours is going to be a handful.”_

_“Takes one to know one, vod’ika.”_

_“I was never a handful.”_

  
  


Several hours later, she was woken up by Ordo. “Sorry, but the scrapper needs a dressing change and the healer asked if you could check on the… the woman?” 

Teryn sat up and rubbed her eyes. “Yeah, of course.” She squinted at the light in the window. “What time is it?”

“Afternoon. You’ve been asleep for a while.” Ordo made a soft hum as she looked down at Cuan. “I can stay with him.” 

“Thanks.” She gave Cuan’s arm a squeeze and went to find Kata. 

Kata’s foot was, to put it delicately, a mess. Getting the bits of boot out had been terrible for everyone, and even with bacta patches, the scars would be extensive. True to Mandalorian form, Kata refused strong pain medication. “Need to be alert.” 

Teryn rolled her eyes but didn’t argue. There was no point with this one. 

Kata hissed as the old bandages were removed and Teryn put more burn cream on her foot. “He wanted me to talk him up and probably hoped I’d be subtle and smooth about it, but, fuck it. The warrior that helped you back? He likes you and wanted to know how he should ‘indicate interest’ or whatever.” 

Kata eyed Teryn narrowly. “I don’t even know his name.”

Teryn shrugged. “Not my information to tell, but… that’s usually a part of the whole getting to know you process.” 

Kata considered her foot as Teryn wrapped bandages around it. “Aiight, I’ll talk to him, I guess.” 

Teryn smiled a bit. “He’s quiet but he’s smart and resourceful. And if you tell him you want him to find you a strill cub, he will not rest until he has hunted one down for you.”

“He has Foundlings, right? He talked about them before.”

“He’s devoted to the two of them.” 

Kata nodded as she hopped down from the table and scowled at the crutches Teryn offered. Teryn merely raised an eyebrow and Kata grudgingly took them. “I’ll talk to him.” 

The woman was still asleep. Teryn went back to Cuan’s room. Ordo was sitting quietly as she knew he would be, fussing with one of his vambraces. He gave her a nod and she sat down next to Cuan. 

“The woman we brought in.” Ordo started, then stopped. Teryn looked at him, waiting for him to collect his thoughts and go on. “She’s… you thought she was one of us.”

“She… was,” Teryn said, softly. “She said her Tribe was all dead.” 

“How could you tell? You seemed to be pretty certain about it.” 

“You can recognize it. When you see it.” 

Ordo looked at her steadily, processing. “You’ve met more of them.”

Teryn nodded. “Several.” She sighed. “Not all of them knew about me- some recognized it. Sometimes we talked. Others… I gave a wide berth to.” She touched Cuan’s hand. 

“There’s a certain… shocked hopelessness you see, especially early on. Like you can’t quite believe that this is how you have to see the world now. It’s so bright. And then it just becomes numb. Depending on the circumstances there’s some flavor of anger.” She picked up his hand and held it, running her fingers over his knuckles. “But over all of it is the shame. No matter how it happened, no matter if you chose it or someone chose for you, there’s just _shame_. So much of it.” 

Ordo nodded quietly. 

“There were some I saw in bars or cantinas- the accents came out when they were drunk, or they’d drop a word or two. One I saw night after night after night, trying to drown himself.” She shrugged. “I never went to talk to him, I don’t know his story. But I could tell. I heard that every so often he’d find someone else to sell a part of his armor to, and then drink it, and then he’d sell another piece. Giving a story about how he won it in a card game, or killed whoever wore it, but…” A sigh. “I don’t know what he did when he finally ran out. But I think we both can guess.” 

“There were a few that vanished after the Purge,” Ordo said. “I remember that they just… left. Sometimes they’d leave their armor… I remember one time we found armor packed neatly next to the lava river.” 

“There was one girl- gods, she was so young. She said that her helmet had been taken in a battle, and her Tribe just left her. Just… left. Left her behind. She couldn’t have been more than twenty, and she said it had been five years before...”

Ordo blew out his nose. “She’d just…she must have just barely sworn...” 

“Yeah. At least I was an adult with a skill.” Teryn’s mouth twisted bitterly. “She was bounty hunting. I don’t know what happened to her, but…”

“Maybe the beroya can find out.” 

“I want to believe that she found a safe place to land. I don’t want the truth.” 

They sat quietly.

“Some of them, they accepted it. Mostly the ones who chose to walk away. They found a life to live. I found one. It was… fine. It was a good life.” She frowned to herself. “It should have been a good life. It should have been enough. But it was…empty.” She looked down at Cuan again. “Nothing can go where your soul was. Nothing fills that. Whether you choose it or not.” 

Ordo took a deep breath. He’d thought about what the Tribe had done to her for months. He’d gotten Din to discuss it a little while they were hunting so many months ago, and he’d been considering the entire question ever since. “I’m sorry for what we did to you.” 

She didn’t make any indication she’d heard him, lost deep in memories. “There was another man, during the war. I saw several that I’m certain were… no matter what the circumstances, we all hate the Imperials, so it wasn’t a surprise to find them with the Alliance in one way or another. I know this one was. He was brought in during a battle… this one went on for weeks, I think I slept for maybe five hours the entire time. I would count the days from when I was… when he… I knew to the day how long it had been and everything ran together at that point.” She stared off in the distance, and Ordo quietly cleared his throat. 

“The.. the man?”

“He was brought in, and I put him back together, and offered him pain medication. He said ‘k’atini’ and I just responded ‘sheb’ and then we stared at each other.”

“Who was he?”

“I never learned his name. I patched him up, and later we… reminded each other we were alive for the moment.” She smiled, sadly. “He was brought back to us a couple more times during that battle, and the last time… he said if he was brought back, not to waste anything on him.”

“Was he?” 

“No, he was determined to take out as many with him as he could, and he did. The last time I saw him, I asked him his name. It was rude -it was so rude- but I knew there wouldn’t be another chance. He said it didn’t matter because there was no one left to remember him, and he would never see any of them again. I said that I would, and we both exchanged a laugh at the idea of one dar’manda saying the remembrance for another.” She gave another ghost of a smile. “I do, even though I never learned his true name.” 

Ordo nodded. He could understand that. “How many…. How many do you think there are?”

“I have no idea. But I know how many of us there are left. And we can’t afford to lose people like this.” 

  
  


The woman was awake when Teryn went to check on her, but barely. She’d managed to shower and was staring at the soup, like she couldn’t quite figure out what to do with it. She turned to stare at Teryn, who gave her a gentle smile.

“Where are we?” 

“In a Covert.” 

“Oh.” 

“How are you feeling?”

“Tired.” The woman fell back against her pillows again and Teryn frowned to herself. There was something else, now that she was clean and a little less wary. Something was tickling at the back of Teryn’s mind and she couldn’t quite place it. 

“Do you think you might want to sit outside for a bit? It’s a nice day and sunshine is good for a lot of things.” 

The woman looked at her and frowned. “Outside? My Tribe never saw the outside.” 

“Well, this one does. There’s a place to sit right outside the door. Just for a few minutes.” 

The woman blinked her big, dark eyes and nodded slowly. Her leg was in pretty good shape, considering, but it was still a slow, exhausting trip to the bench. Teryn had grabbed a blanket, which she tucked around the woman’s legs.

The woman looked around. It was late afternoon but still warm. Some of the Foundlings were playing, including Lypatri. A few adults were bustling around but it was mostly quiet as everyone grabbed a few moments of peace before dinner.

“It’s nice here.” The woman closed her eyes and leaned her head back against the wall. 

“It is.” 

“Al’baar’ur!” a voice called. The woman flinched sharply and Teyrn turned to shoot Paz a furious glare. 

“What?”

“We need to know if-” Paz stopped suddenly, staring at the woman, who was staring back at him with big, dark eyes. 

“Buir?” 

  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, everyone. Everyone comes home. 
> 
> Mando'a translations
> 
> al’baar’ur: Doctor  
> ner Kurs’ika: My wolf cub  
> cyar’ika: sweetheart  
> Ba’buir: Grandparent  
> ad’ika: little one, kid  
> buir: parent  
> vod’ade: sibling's children  
> Su cuy: Hi!  
> Aliit: family  
> Ba’vodu’ad: Cousin  
> Ruug’alor: Old Alor  
> Bu’ad’ika: Grandchild (diminutive)  
> Hibir: Student  
> Vaar’tur: Morning  
> ba’vodu: parent's sibling  
> k’atini: it's only pain  
> Sheb: ass  
> dar'manda:


	35. Don’t let me die while I’m like this

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The ripples go out.

“Buir?”

Teryn’s head whipped around to look at the woman- at Vha Vizsla. Vha, who everyone thought -assumed, knew- had died in the attack on the Covert on Nevarro. Vha, who had somehow survived and ended up enslaved on Ord Mantell. 

_“A gift from our usual buyer.”_

Vha had gone completely white, staring at Paz. “They said they killed everyone.”

Paz stared at his Foundling for an endless minute, then turned on his heel and walked away. 

Teryn stared at his back, then back at Vha, torn between the need to drag him back and the duty to take care of her patient. Duty, as always, won. “Would you like to go back inside?” 

Vha, eyes glazing over in shock, nodded mutely and managed to struggle to her feet. They made their way back to her room and she crawled into the bed, starting to tremble. “They said… everyone. Everyone was killed. There was no one...”

Teryn tucked another blanket around her. “Not everyone. They got all the Foundlings out, and most of their buire. They’re… they’re all here.” 

“...my vod’ika?” Vha somehow managed to shrink even smaller as she asked about Faris. 

Teryn nodded. “He’s here. Would you like me… would you like me to tell him?” On one hand, it wasn’t really her place. One the other, fuck Paz and his sense of propriety. Faris had a right to know his ori’vod was alive, and here, and safe. 

Vha stared at her, then nodded mutely. 

But before she went to see Faris, or anyone else, she went to find Din. 

He and Cara were in his quarters, sorting out gear, seeing what needed repair or replacement. Jha’iil was helping, in his way, by bringing them anything he could reach and a few things he would pull down to him. He turned when Teryn knocked and gave her a bright smile that immediately turned into a worried coo. Din turned quickly at the sound. Whatever it was he saw in her face, he walked over and pulled her into a hug. Jha’iil made a distressed noise and launched himself at his people and Din instinctively caught him with one arm so Jha’iil could hug them both. 

“How is he?”

“No change.” Teryn pulled away and gave Din an expressionless look.

“What is it?”

Teryn turned to Cara. “Can you take him outside?” She held out Jha’iil who made a sound of disagreement. “I need to talk to my brother. Pri-privately.” 

Cara nodded silently and took Jha’iil onto her shoulders. Jha’iil squawked, and Din just shook his head at him. “No, adi’ka. Go with her. It’ll be fine.” All three of them looked at Teryn with varying degrees of doubt that it would be fine. Jha’iil nodded, but with a pout that made it clear this was being done under duress. 

Cara left, giving Teryn and Din a worried look. Teryn looked at anywhere but Din, trying to figure out how to start. As was Din’s habit, very little in the small set of rooms was personal -to him. But there were signs of Jha’iil everywhere. Toys, drawings, marker scribbles on a designated place on the wall. Din picked up a few of Jha’iil’s many stuffies and tossed them into a basket while he waited for Teryn to start. 

“The woman- the one who gave Kurs’ika the amulet….” She paused, unsure how to go on. He gave an encouraging nod. ”She’s Vha.”

Din shook his head slightly. “Vha who?”

“Vha Vizsla.” 

Din pulled back and shook his head again. “She was killed.” 

“Apparently not.” Teryn sat down heavily. 

Din made an exhale of disbelief and shock. “Does the al’verde know?”

Teryn nodded numbly. “She recognized him, and he… he recognized her.”

“Did you have any idea it was her?”

“I was certain she was… had been… Mando’ade. But the last time I would have seen her, she would have been what, eight?” Lypatri’s age. “And she was wearing a training helmet a lot, even then.” She shook her head. “She never saw my face, so she wouldn’t have recognized me, even if… I had no idea she could have been anyone from Nevarro.”

“Fuck,” Din said with feeling.

“Yeah."

“Do you know what happened? Anything?”

“No, she wasn’t up to questions. Asked for a sedative and… it seemed like the best idea.” Teryn rubbed at her forehead and then pulled away, staring at her fingers. How long had it been before touching her own face became something she didn’t think about doing? A year? Two years? Five years? 

When does something become a habit?

“How did he take it?”

“How do you think?” Teryn’s mouth twisted bitterly. “Not well. He stormed off. Didn’t say anything to her, but… it’s her.” It was better on one level, she supposed, than how he’d reacted when she’d tried to come home. Literally being thrown into an acidic rain had been terrible. 

But he was Vha’s buir. He’d doted on her, and while Vayez was utterly Paz’s child, and Faris clearly had a special place in his heart, it was Vha that had him wrapped around her little fist, from day one. And to see him turn his back on her… 

It was horrible. 

“Alor must have known. Or suspected. She was salvaging the armor of those who fell…” Din started to pace. The guilt of the massacre still weighed on him. Probably always would. Even though he knew -he knew- that the Covert had made their own choices, he still felt responsible. His choices had started the chain of events. 

He thought about Jha’iil, who always looked at him with love and trust. If Din Djarin hadn’t gone back for the child, then he wouldn’t have his son. He probably wouldn’t have his vod’ika. He wouldn’t have this place where his Foundling could be safe and happy. 

He would still be alone, trying to move fast enough so his loneliness wouldn’t catch up with him. 

But the cost sometimes felt too high to bear. And it seemed that the costs were still being tallied. Oh sure, Paz hadn’t blamed him- he’d raised Vayez and Vha to be warriors. He’d raised them to follow the Way. They’d done as honor and duty demanded. 

The Armorer _must_ have known something. 

“What are we going to do?” Teryn asked, quietly. About Vha, about Paz, about the entirety of Mandalorian society. 

“I don’t know, but…” Din sighed. He knew it was cowardly, but he was relieved to not have to have been there when the Armorer told Paz that his two oldest Foundlings had been killed. Especially now. Bad enough to have been the cause of their deaths, but now to have been the cause of Vha losing her soul-

-he looked at Teryn. She was staring off into the middle distance, lost in memories he was certain she’d rather forget. Back in the ruins of Jelucaan he’d wondered something that Cuan had actually said out loud once. How many had been lost this way? 

When, maybe, just maybe, it didn’t need to be like this?

“Vod’ika?”

Teryn looked up at him. “I need to tell the al’verde’s ad.” 

He sighed. “You need to do something else first.” 

“What?”

“Take a shower.” He huffed back a laugh at her incredulous look. “It’ll help. You’ll feel better.” 

“Are you trying to imply something ori’vod?” 

He tilted his head. _You’re smart. You figure it out._

The bitch of it was, Teryn thought as she scrubbed off the layers of fear-sweat, the stress of the last five days, the feeling of Maxgev _touching_ her, he was right. She had smelled, and she did feel better. Slightly more able to face reality. 

Slightly. 

If only reality wasn’t so horrific.

Paz had no memory of getting to the Forge. He came back to himself after the tool chest hit the floor, scattering the forging tools all over. The sound startled him out of his fugue state and he stared around the Forge. Everything that had been neatly organized and put away was now scattered around the room. With a roar, he picked up a hammer and threw it at the beskar mythosaur skull. 

Something made him turn around -not a sound, but a feeling. The Armorer stood in the door, merely looking at him, and he whirled on her. “Did you know?”

“Did I know what?”

“Vha is alive. And dishonored.” He took a step towards his alor, threatening. “She was the one who brought us to Ord Mantell.”

The Armorer staggered back in shock. The idea that the woman who had given Lypatri the amulet was dar’manda had of course occurred to her. Who else would know to send the child after a Mandalorian and have an amulet? But for it to be one of her own Tribe… 

“You told me they were both dead.” Paz stepped forward again.

The Armorer didn't flinch this time, trying to regroup. “I believed that to be the case. When I salvaged the remains of our vode from the Covert, I found your eldest, but not Vha. He was near the lava river, and I had seen them drawing Imperials in that direction.” She shook her head. “I had no idea that she was alive. None at all.” 

“You never found her and you didn’t tell me.” His voice broke. “How could you not tell me? Or,” his voice dropped to a hiss, “Did you find her armor? Her helmet?”

“I found nothing. I assumed she had fallen into the river, or they’d taken trophies… I am sorry.” 

“Sorry doesn’t change anything.” Paz spit. “She’s still… I still lost them both. Only I’ll never get her back, not in the end.” 

Hidden from both of them, Faris stepped back away from the door to the Forge, then took off running into the woods. 

Teryn hadn’t been able to find Faris, not quickly, and she wasn’t about to poke around the Nevarro Tribe’s building any more than she had to. Outside the medbay, though, she found Atin. 

Atin had been trained as a small kitten to stay outside the medical areas and he scrupulously obeyed that Rule. In Atin’s mind, there were Rules, and there were Noises. “No cats on the table” was a Noise. "Stop eating that," was a Noise. But The Lady was very serious about the medical areas, so he respected the Rule.

But he’d long been in the habit of waiting outside of the medical areas and that is where he was: outside of the window to Cuan’s room. He meowed an anxious greeting to her, looking from her to the window. She patted her shoulder and he jumped up to his accustomed perch. They went over to the window so Atin could see inside and he trilled.

“I know. I’m scared, too.” She reached up to scratch his ears. Atriu was in there, staring off into space, holding her helmet -Arkil’s helmet- in her lap. 

Teryn gave Atin another scratch. “Thank you for checking on him.” Atin gave her hairline a lick and hopped down. “Our vod’ad is around, he’d probably like to see you.” Atin twined around her legs, purring, then trotted off with purpose. 

Teryn went inside, exchanging nods with Roccan. “Have you slept?” She asked.

He shrugged. “Some. Have you?” There were dark circles under his eyes. 

She gave him a half-smile and a shrug back. “Some.” She tilted her head to the bacta tank, where Cormu was floating inside. “How is he?”

Roccan sighed heavily. “Hard to say. It might be too late, but… I had to try.” She nodded. Of course he did. 

At Cuan’s room she knocked, and gave Atriu a smile. “Any change?”

Atriu looked up and blinked several times. “No, I don’t think so.” She shrugged. “I’m not sure, to be honest.” 

Teryn looked first at the readings, hoping they would prepare her, but looking down at him, so quiet and so still, was still a blow. He sprawled as a sleeper, taking up all the available room. She didn’t mind, generally, because he wouldn’t shove her out of the way, he’d just worm his way around her and it felt safe and warm and comforting. To see him lying so still and just as he’d been placed in the bed was wrong. It was just wrong. 

“I didn’t know it was like that.”

Teryn turned to look at Atriu. “What?”

“Combat.”

“You did well. You did your job. ” Teryn said. “We were able to watch for a while.” 

“I don’t remember anything.” Atriu whispered. “I just… I’ve never killed anyone before.” 

“It’s hard the first time. It helps to remember that they put themselves in that position. They chose to steal children.” Teryn’s mouth tightened. “They deserved what they got.”

“How old were you? The first time?”

“Same age as you. I was newly sworn and I was trying to get someone stabilized for evac when…” she shrugged. “Stormtroopers barely register as people, but. It needed to be done.” 

“I saw his face. I saw his face when he died.” 

“He would have killed you and every one of us. Someone like him did this to your ba’vodu. You did your duty, protecting your tribe. This is what you swore to.” Teryn said, firmly. “This is part of it, and it’s not easy. The Creed is what makes us Mando’ade.”

_“Ori’vod?”_

_“You’re right. I don’t belong here. Not yet. I just need… I need to figure out how to get back.”_

It was full dark before Faris emerged from the woods. He looked at the Nevarro Tribe’s building for a long time, considering, before slipping into his room and then emerging without his helmet. He didn’t see anyone, nor did he seek anyone out. 

He circled around to the medbay, and after quietly asking one of the other medics where he could find his al’baar’ur, he found Teryn in one of the supply closets, fussing. 

“Do you always organize things when you’re anxious?”

Teryn turned and gave a rueful shrug. “Always have. It annoys people.” 

Faris nodded and ran his fingers over a box of stims. “Is it true?”

Teryn gave him the courtesy of not pretending that she didn’t know what he was asking. “Yes.”

“I heard Buir and Alor fighting.”

“Ah. Has he talked to you?”

“No.” Faris shifted a small bundle under his arm. “I went to go… think about things.” 

“Do you want to see her? She’ll probably sleep until morning, but she wanted you to know… that she was here.” 

“Is she badly hurt?”

Teryn gestured for him to follow her. “Not badly. Broken ribs, bruises, some marks from the collar-“

“Collar.” Faris blew out his nose in disgust. 

“Yes. But mentally… that’ll take a lot to work through.” 

“What’s it like?”

“Our experiences were very different. I was captive for only a few days… maybe a week. I’m not sure. For her, it’s been over a year.” 

“That’s not what I mean.” 

“It’s different for everyone.” She paused outside Vha’s room. “She wanted to know if you made it. She said they told her everyone had been killed and she’s been mourning you for a year.” 

Faris nodded and set his jaw, exactly like how she remembered Vha setting her own jaw as a child. He glanced at Teryn again and she gave him a nod; he went in and shut the door. Teryn could understand. The bond of siblings was strong and didn’t need witnesses. 

Vha was curled up into as small a ball as she possibly could. She hadn’t been as large as her ori’vod, but she’d been quick. Now she looked still and small and scared. Faris let out a small noise, then unwrapped the bundle he brought with him and tucked his old stuffed strill -the one Vha had given him, and that Vayez had given Vha- under her arm.

“I’m glad you’re back with us, ori’vod,” he whispered. “I’ll make Buir listen, don’t worry.” He curled up in a chair in the corner, watchful. 

Teryn continued to fuss in the supply closet. Roccan had put his foot down about reorganzing the main supply room but did allow that this closet could use some work. It wasn’t true and they both knew it, but it would give her something to do that would work off the anxious energy and wouldn’t upend the entire system.

Late in the night, she finally went to Cuan’s room. After Atriu left, Tuathal had sat with him for a while. The old man had said he could still feel Cuan in there, somewhere, but Teryn hadn’t found it very comforting. He had also looked utterly haggard. He’d lost so much already. So many people. 

There was still no change, and she curled up next to him. At least she could still feel his heart beating, his chest rising and falling with every breath. She was terrified to sleep, but she was just so tired. 

Jha’iil waited until he knew his Buir was asleep. Din had stayed up late in the night talking with Cara, trying to figure out what they could work out about the children from the datapads. Jha’iil had pretended to be asleep when Din checked on him right before going to sleep himself and then he’d hopped down from his crib and used his powers to open the doors and slip outside. 

It wasn’t that he couldn’t leave wherever Din put him whenever he wanted. He just usually chose to stay. And right now, at this moment, he chose to leave their rooms, call Atin, and sneak over to the medbay. 

He didn’t entirely understand what had happened, but he knew that his beloved ba’vodu was terribly worried and upset about several things and he also knew he could help with one of them. Granted, she had told him he should not use his powers like this unless she asked. 

But he also knew that she would never ask. Never. So he had to take matters into his own claws. So he and Atin made their way across the compound, sneaking from shadow to shadow, until they got to the window outside Cuan’s room. 

Jha’iil opened the window with a flick of his hand, and giving Atin a pat, jumped up to it, then down into the room. His ba’vodu was curled up next to Cuan, and he could tell she wasn’t deeply asleep, so he would need to be quiet and careful until he was done. 

Jha’iil put his hands on Cuan’s arm and concentrated. 

_“It’s time to go, ori’vod. I’ll be waiting for you. Don’t hurry back.”_

_“Ret’urcye mhi, vod’ika.”_

_“Urcye mhi, ori’vod.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After weeks of trying to ignore the Vizla/Vizsla spelling divide, I'm going through and correcting everything to Vizsla. 
> 
> Mando'a Translations
> 
> Buir: Parent  
> vod’ika: Younger sibling  
> ori’vod: Older sibling  
> ad'ika: Little one, kid  
> Kurs’ika: Wolf Cub  
> al’verde: Commander  
> Mando’ade: Sons and daughters of Mandalore  
> ad: Child  
> alor: Chief  
> dar’manda: a state of not being Mandalorian - not an outsider, but one who has lost his heritage, and so his identity and his soul - regarded with absolute dread by most traditional-minded Mando'ade  
> vode: Comrades  
> vod’ad: sibling's child  
> ba’vodu: Parent's sibling  
> al’baar’ur: Doctor  
> Ret’urcye mhi: Goodbye - lit. *Maybe we'll meet again* (Remove the "ret" and you remove the "maybe")


	36. Blood on the vines

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A short interlude that addresses a few of the MANY things going on. There will be a full length chapter coming on Monday. 
> 
> (Seriously, I have so many plates spinning.)

Not for the first time, Solde was glad for her helmet. She’d never had the ability to keep a poker face while bargaining but with the helmet, she could at least keep the fact that she found this particular dock foreman to be distasteful to herself. 

No, he’d said; no, he hadn’t heard about any shootout. Well, actually, yes, he might have heard something but it was so hard to keep track of rumors these days, so he’d just heard there was one. 

Well, actually, maybe he’d heard that it was down in the lower docks, but not details. Well, actually, maybe there had been a couple of Mandalorians looking for a transport, but…

Solde just kept her annoyance to herself and put down credit chit after credit chit to prompt each, “Well, actually.” Well, actually there had been a larger group of Mandalorians, but they seemed to have vanished several weeks before. There had been a group of men asking around and they might have been the same ones that got in the shootout.

When the last credit chit didn’t prompt another “Well, actually,” Solde left the dock foreman giggling over his hoard of credits. Well, actually, she thought to herself, his hoard of counterfeit credits that wouldn’t pass muster anywhere he could be expected to try to use them. 

Down at the lower docks, there was just a mess. It hadn’t been well-maintained in quite some time and was near enough to the wastelands that Solde needed to set her helmet filters to maximum to block the smells enough to even focus. Had this tribe been living here? 

She hoped not. 

Finding the spot of the shootout wasn’t hard. There were blaster marks all around, and fading footprints that led into a narrow chokepoint. And there…

...the bodies were still there. The mercs appeared to have taken their dead with them but the bodies of the two Mandalorians were still where they fell. Solde stepped back into the shadows and turned on her infrared scanners. 

No one was around. Not a single lifeform, save for some vermin. She turned her scanners onto the Mandalorians. Their armor had only token beskar; it was mostly durasteel and plasteel and the weapons were old. 

That _might_ explain why they hadn’t been looted and desecrated, but… she stepped forward, senses alert for anything out of the ordinary. 

There was a growl from a narrow alley. Solde stopped and drew her blaster. She took one more step forward towards the bodies and a long, dark shape darted out to take a defensive stance between her and the fallen Mandalorians.

It had six legs, and a long tail, and many, many, many teeth. 

“Osik,” Solde breathed. “You’re a strill.” 

  
  


Rima and Ademe had gone through the datapads that Cara and Teryn had grabbed from the warehouse. Some entries were in code, of course, the ones involving transactions, but they could see how much each child had been bought for. 

“Who can afford 4,000 credits per kid?” Ademe asked, frowning. “They had at least 50 mercs in there, and while they weren’t the most expensive I’ve ever seen, they weren’t cheap.”

Rima rubbed her forehead and knocked back a shot of tihaar. “I think we can safely guess former Imperials. A lot of money went missing at the end of the war. They’d be the most likely to have that kind of liquidity.” 

Ademe sighed. “And if former Imperials are looking for children…” 

“...they want to rebuild an army, yes.” 

Ademe flipped through another datapad. “Hm. At least they kept records of where they found them. One of the kids said they were from Corellia?”

“Yeah, that’s what the other al’verde said.”

“Where is he, anyway?” Ademe asked. “Wasn’t he going to go through these with us?”

“I just got a message that something came up.” Rima shrugged. “Things are tense over there and I’m not sure what’s going on.” Her tone implied that she’d rather not know if she didn’t have to. 

“Looks like they grabbed most of the younger bunch from Corellia. Surprising that they’d go into the Core like that.” Ademe frowned. “Maybe they were there for some other reason and took the opportunity…?”

Rima nodded, thinking. “Corellia does have decent social services… we can probably return most of them, if not all.” At Ademe’s snort, Rima smiled. “You know we can’t possibly keep them all, not if there’s family. And we have to prioritize the Mando’ade.” 

“Any word from Solde?”

“Not yet, but it’s still early.” Rima drummed her fingers. “If there’s anything to learn, she’ll sniff it out.” She stood up. “In the meantime, we have a guest that needs to answer some questions.”

  
  


Solde stared down at the strill. It was holding one of its many paws up, and there were two nasty burns on one side. And, she sighed to herself, it was holding its tail awkwardly. “K’uur, k’uur,” she said quietly. “K’uur, udesii.” 

The strill visibly reacted to the sound of Mando’a and whined, dropping to a crouch and slinking towards Solde. 

“K’uur. Yes, good strill. You protected them, didn’t you? As best you could?” Solde held out a closed fist and allowed the strill to smell it. The strill sniffed it and, with another whine, carefully closed its jaws around Solde’s wrist and pulled. “You want me to go with you?” She stood up and took a step.

Strills were intelligent. And they were protective of children, especially small ones. So Solde wasn’t entirely surprised when the strill led her into a ruined building and found a tiny sleeping child, its cheeks hollow with dehydration, hidden in a corner. But it was alive.

“Oh, ik’aad.” Solde picked up the child. “Oh, no.” 

The strill whined again, and Solde gave it a skritch behind the ears. “Good job. You did good.” She frowned to herself. What to do? The child needed medical help as soon as possible but she didn’t know anything more about the Tribe it came from. Leaving a coded message with coordinates was probably the best idea, but she wasn’t thrilled with it. 

Codes could be broken. Or the message might not be found. And once the strill left with them- because it was clear to her that the strill was going to stay with this child, no matter what- the bodies would almost certainly be desecrated. No, she had to bring them back, too. 

Finally, after some rapid thinking, she left a coded message that contained a communicator code, and the words “Haat, ijaa, haa'it.” _Truth, honor, vision._ Words to seal a pact. If there was anyone in this Tribe left, and if they came back, and if they found the message, they’d understand that Mandalorians had been there and they’d be able to get in touch. 

Solde tucked the child into a carton and loaded up the bodies. The strill watched, curled up near the child, where Solde had given it some water and a bit of her rations. First, they’d go to a medical center and make sure the child could make it until they got home. Then it was back to Samaki, as quickly as possible.

She tried not to think about how very big those three ifs were. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mando'a translations
> 
> Osik: shit  
> K’uur: Hush  
> udesii: Calm  
> ik’aad: child younger than 3. 
> 
> STRILLS. https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Strill I picture this one as a Mastiff, but with extra legs and a HUGE terrifying tail.


	37. After the night when I wake up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The morning after.

Cuan opened his eyes.

The room wasn’t familiar, the bed wasn’t familiar, but the shape and scent of the person pressed against his side was. He reached up to touch the hand that was splayed against his chest, then rolled to pull Teryn closer in.

With a soft sigh, she snuggled into his chest and relaxed deeper into sleep. He smiled in a relief he couldn’t quite understand and slipped back into a restful, healing slumber.

Jha’iil blinked in exhaustion and nodded to himself. That was taken care of. He hopped down from the bed, intending to sneak back to his room before Din woke up to find him gone, but his bed was so far and there was a chair to curl up in right there…

On Dantooine, Iruz’zake locked the doors to her massage parlor and shut off the lights on the main level. The parlor was larger than it looked. There was the front room, a few different rooms for clients (depending on species and preferences), and her private office. That was all on the main level.

Below that, though, was a level that held her private quarters, including a room set up specifically for dancing. What she’d told Teryn was true- she had been injured, and that meant that she couldn’t dance well enough for patrons. The expected dance form for twi’lek girls involved a great deal of lekku tossing and sinuous movements. With the types of deep scarring she had on her lekku and the damage to her hip, the tossing was painful and the expected movements were stiff and ugly.

But Zake had been taught to dance by her mother, who knew both what men expected and traditional Twi’lek dances, and had made sure her daughter could do both. “We might be forced to live this life, sama, but we cannot forget who we are.”

And ever since she’d been able to leave her life of servitude, thanks to Din Djarin, she’d practiced the dances of a home she’d never seen. Working to get the hand positions just so. The crouches and stamps and kicks as clean as she could get them. Spins and leaps. Yes, sometimes she would get so into the dance that her lekku would ache, and yes, sometimes her hip would complain for a few days, but it was worth it. This was for her, not anyone else.

After she received Din’s message that the operation was over and that he’d send more later, she turned on the music and danced until she was too tired to feel anything but exhausted relief as she collapsed to the floor.

Relief that someone she merely had a great deal of respect for shouldn’t be this profound. And yet.

If the music hadn’t stopped, she wouldn’t have heard the smashing in of the door upstairs. But it had, and she did.

Light was just starting to trickle in through the window when Teryn opened her eyes. Something was off, but it felt so normal with Cuan’s arms around-

She snapped into awareness and stared down at him. He blinked awake at her movement.

“Is this a dream?” she whispered.

In answer, he threaded his fingers into the back of her hair and gently pulled her forehead towards his until she resisted. He stopped and gave her a small, slightly sad smile. “I can only do that in a dream, mesh’la.”

“It’s real. You’re.. You’re alive. And awake.” She ran her fingers down his face, smoothing out his eyebrows and feeling the scruff of a few days. “You came back.” The tears started to spill down her cheeks.

Cuan closed his eyes at her touch. He couldn’t remember much, other than scooping up the last child and then an explosion and blinding pain, but he had the sense that he’d been far away and something had brought him back.

She crawled down off the bed and opened up his robe to look at his chest and abdomen. The scars from the rebar and the surgery were visible, but much, much less pronounced than they should have been. She frowned, running her fingers across them. He choked back a laugh. “That tickles.”

She rubbed her eyes. “How do you feel?”

“Tired. Sore. Weak.” He looked around and realized where he was. “...oh. I see.”

“What do you remember?”

“Did we get them? Did we get them all?” He rubbed his head. “I remember something hit my jetpack…”

Teryn nodded slowly. “You… it was bad. But we got all of them out.” She didn’t know if he knew about the Mando’ade kid that was killed during the operation but this wasn’t the time to discuss it, or the fact that Cormu was still in the tank.

“And the woman?”

Teryn looked down, then up and nodded. “Her, too.”

“What is it?”

“She….” She took a deep breath. “She’s from our tribe. She’s the al’verde’s middle Foundling. Everyone thought she’d been killed.”

“Oh. Oh shit.” He reached out and took one of her hands. “That’s…”

“It is.” She stepped out of his reach. “I need to get a scanner. You shouldn’t be awake…”

He frowned at her, then squirmed a little and pulled out the stuffed mythosaur where it had gotten underneath him. “Where did this come from?”

She smiled. “Kurs’ika. She wanted you to have it until you got better.”

He nodded and fell back against the pillow. Even that amount of effort was almost too much. “LaarSenaar, what happened? How long has it been?”

“I…. we got back yesterday morning. I think it was yesterday. You were in the bacta tank for a while…” She backed up another step to the door. “I need a scanner, I’ll be right back.” She fled out the door and made it to a refresher before she could throw up.

It was stupid. How many people had she put back together? How many had beaten the odds? How many of them were comrades, allies, friends, _family?_ She’d been a medic, a doctor, a _healer_ for over twenty years. This was ridiculous and outsized and he was likely going to be just fine.

She threw up again.

Cuan frowned at the door, then looked around the room. Besides the mythosaur, there was a blanket that he knew lived in his ba’buir’s room. If he was in the bacta tank… he looked down at the scars. He knew that they were new. But even with bacta…. He looked around again and his eyes lit on the small bundle in the chair.

“Vod’ad?” Cuan looked at the distance between the bed and the chair and grimaced. Objectively, it wasn’t far. But…. he pushed the covers down and tried to sit up, and fell back. This was going to take a while.

Din woke up to a strange silence. Normally, Jha’iil woke up before him and would keep himself more or less amused until he would decide that it was time for breakfast. But even before he’d wake up, Jha’iil made small snores and sighs and was generally a noisy sleeper, unless something was wrong.

With a frown, Din rolled out of his bed- he’d gotten so used to sleeping on the thin, barely padded bunk in the Razor Crest that he’d needed to find the hardest mattress possible to even begin to sleep comfortably- and padded to Jha’iil’s room.

The sight of the empty crib made his heart skip a beat. Even though, logically, he knew that they were in a safe place, that it was unthinkable that anyone could have taken his child, he ran to the door and almost opened it before realizing that his helmet was sitting in its usual spot, near the door. He pulled it on and ran out.

It was early and almost no one was moving about yet. He turned on the tracking function in his HUD; something he’d rarely had to use to track Jha’iil. The kid was pretty good about staying where he was supposed to be. The tracks were tiny and fading fast. He’d left their quarters hours before, and… Din snorted, unsurprised to see loth cat tracks joining Jha’iil’s.

The trail was, Din had to admit, well placed for two creatures of their size trying to avoid detection. It seemed his kid had been paying attention after all. It led, eventually, towards the medbay. Din sighed and took off at a run, already certain of what Jha’iil’s intentions would have been.

He found Teryn in the hallway and grabbed her. “Where is he? Where’s Jha’iil?”

She frowned at him in confusion, then suddenly realization dawned. “Oh, SHIT.”

She ran down to Cuan’s room and flung open the door. Cuan was half out of the bed, struggling to get his feet under him. He looked up to see both Teryn and Din, her scowling and Din looking around frantically until his gaze landed on the chair.

Jha’iil was asleep- or unconscious, it was hard to tell. Din went to pick him up, and hesitated briefly. “Why didn’t you stop him?” he snapped at Teryn. “You should have stopped him!”

“I didn’t know!” She scowled harder at Cuan. “What are you doing? Get back in bed!”

“I saw him…” Cuan dragged himself back into the bed. “It didn’t seem that far.”

Teryn rolled her eyes at him, then stopped and touched his cheek. He covered her hand with his and turned his head to kiss her palm. She shook her head. “Fuckin’ shu’shuk.”

Din picked up Jha’iil, who opened his eyes to blink at Din and smiled, before letting his eyes droop closed again. Din sighed and Jha’iil made his usual mumble as he fell asleep. By all appearances he was fine, just tired. But Din remembered how long he’d been unconscious after the mudhorn. He sighed again and turned to look at Teryn, who was frowning at her medscanner. “How is he?”

She didn’t look up, didn’t look at either one of them. “He’s… fine. Weak, clearly, those muscles are going to take a little time to get back up to fighting strength, but…” the tears started to threaten again. “Fine.”

Cuan closed a hand around her arm. “See? I’m fine. You’re fine. We’re going to be fine.” He looked at Jha’iil. “Did he… move things along?”

Teryn wiped at her eyes and ran a hand across Jha’iil forehead and checked his pulse. “I think so. He must have.” She gave Din a nod, _he's fine,_ then sighed. “I told him. I told him not to do this unless I asked.” Din made a choked, outraged noise, and she glared. “I would never ask!”

“Did you think about it?” Din said, trying to keep his voice from rising.

“Honestly… no. It didn’t occur to me. But,” she looked down at Cuan, who still had his hand around her arm and was running his thumb in small circles around the very inside of her wrist. “...if it had occurred to me, I might have thought about it.”

Teryn informed Cuan that he was going to spend the day and most likely the night in the medbay, just to make sure. “I had to rummage around in your guts and we need to make sure I put everything back right.”

Din had rolled his eyes. “She’s been threatening to put mine back wrong for decades and she hasn’t yet.” He had taken Jha’iil back to their quarters with instructions to let him sleep, but to let Teryn know if anything changed.

Privately, even though Cuan wanted to be in his own quarters, in his own bed, with his own woman, the very thought of making it that far was exhausting. But he made Teryn promise that she’d tell Tuathal and Atriu right away. “Rima can wait a bit, but Ba’buir must be worried sick.”

Teryn agreed, then paused. “When you’re a bit more rested, we should talk about Kurs’ika.”

He frowned. “You’re not… changing your mind, are you?”

“No! No, no, of course not. I just… I don’t think we should wait.”

He nodded. Stars knew how long it would be before they could have the celebration that Rima wanted, but leaving Lypatri in this strange limbo wasn’t fair. “Yeah, agreed.” He reached up to finger the ends of her hair. “Go see Sadet about an amulet. This afternoon?”

She nodded and ran a finger down his nose to his lips. He kissed her fingertip. She took a breath to say… something. Anything that might cover all, any, of the things she was feeling. Relief, love, guilt, happiness... but all the words got caught together. Except for three.

“Mhi solus tome…” she whispered and he broke out into a huge grin.

“Mhi solus tome.” _We are one when we are together._

“Mhi solus dar'tome.” Her own smile started to blossom. The slow one, the one that took time to develop and precious few people ever got to see. Had her life gone the way she’d expected it to, it was a smile that only her riduur and children would have seen.

“Mhi solus dar'tome.” _We are one when we are apart._

“Mhi me'dinui an.” She dropped to her knees beside the bed so he could wrap his hand around the curve of her neck, touching the spot beneath her ear.

“Mhi me'dinui an.” _We will share all._ He ran his thumb around her ear, before moving his hand into her hair.

“Mhi ba'juri verde.” She leaned her head into his hand, grinning.

“Mhi ba'juri verde.” _We will raise warriors_. He took a deep breath. “Ner riduur.”

“Ner riduur.” She never thought she’d ever get to say those words, ever.

“We won’t tell anyone. We’ll go through the whole thing like they want, but…” He pulled her head towards him so he could kiss the top of her head, then he pressed his forehead to it. “This is for us. Gar kar’taylir darasuum, ner LaarSenaar, ner cyare.”

“Gar kar’taylir darasuum.” She looked back up at him, her kurs’khaded, her ruus, her kar’ta, and now her riduur, eyes shining.

“And now, ner riduur,” he said, eyes crinkling, “I will say what everyone wants to hear right after they perform the riduurok… I think I need a nap.”

“Yeah, you do.” She stroked his cheek again.

“You should sleep, too.” He rumbled. “I can tell you haven’t, not really.” She smiled.

“I’ll tell them you’re awake and bring Kurs’ika here later.” Her thumb brushed over his lips and he kissed it, eyes already starting to drift shut. “Gar kar’taylir darasuum, ner cyare,” she whispered and left the room.

She leaned against the door and consciously tried to control the smile on her face, but judging from Tabor’s inquisitive head tilt down the corridor, she wasn’t very successful.

Her first stop was at Tuathal’s room and it struck her when she entered that he was _old._ Still proud, still active, but he looked tired. He had been holding his helmet, his sightless eyes staring off into space.

When Teryn entered, the grooves of worry etched into his face deepened and then relaxed. “Ad’ika… is he…?”

She smiled. “He’s awake, and he’ll be fine.” She walked over and took his hands in her own ungloved hands. She knew that made it easier for him to sense what she couldn’t say and his face lit up. “Shhhh. We’re not… we’re going to keep it quiet until we can have the whole…. You know. Thing. But yes.” She ducked her head. “We did.”

He squeezed her hands. “And the kurs’ika?”

“We’re going to do the gai bal Manda this afternoon. He needed to sleep.” Teryn let her voice wobble a bit. “I… my vod’ad, he used his powers. I imagine my ori’vod will want to talk to you about that.”

“Is he alright?”

“I think so. Sleeping. They’re all sleeping, but... I wanted to let you know.” She tilted her head. “Did you sleep?”

“The old don’t require much sleep, ad’ika.” He smiled fondly. “But I’ll try to grab a few hours now…” _Now that I can be assured that he won’t march on while I’m sleeping._ Teryn squeezed his hands again. “Go find your wolf cub, ad’ika. She’s been terrified.”

Vha was awake long before she opened her eyes. Whatever sedative she had been given was strong and she was a bit muddled on everything.The only thing she could be certain on was that she wasn’t in the warehouse. It was quiet. It smelled clean. She was warm. The bed was an actual bed, not a thin pallet on a duracrete floor.

She felt something tucked in her arm and she felt it before she opened her eyes. It felt familiar… she finally looked at it and let out a silent exhale.

The last time she’d held this particular stuffed strill was when she’d given it to her new vod’ika, Faris, when their buir had adopted him. Faris had once confided to her that he knew that he should have passed it along to another Foundling at some point, that he knew he was too old for toys, but he just couldn’t bring himself to do it, not yet. “Maybe when I swear the Creed?” he’d mused.

Toys among the Covert were rare and precious. Sometimes, if the hunting had been good, the beroya was able to bring some new ones, but stuffed toys in particular were well loved and treasured and passed down. Vha didn’t know who had been in possession of the strill before Vayez, but it had gone down through the three Vizsla Foundlings and now… it had come back to her.

And if it had come back to her, that meant- she looked around the room and there, asleep in a chair in the corner, was Faris. He wasn’t wearing his helmet, didn’t even have it with him. She frowned to herself. She’d lost track of the date, but he should be coming of age soon. Very soon. Most of her Tribe had been functionally wearing the helmet all the time before they actually come of age. Seeing him without it was odd.

But if he was there and if he’d brought her the strill, that meant that he didn’t think she was completely lost. Not like… the image of her Buir’s back walking away replayed over and over, replacing the cold voice saying, “Your Tribe has been exterminated, but.. We have a use for you.”

She shuddered and tried to stifle her sobs, but Faris woke up anyway. “Ori’vod?”

“You shouldn’t call me that.” She shook her head. “I’m not any sort of vod anymore.”

“Yes, you are!” he said fiercely. “You’re _my_ ori’vod and I’ll fight anyone who says otherwise.” He almost flung himself at her before remembering what the al’baar’ur had said about Vha’s ribs and instead carefully climbed into the bed and wrapped himself carefully around her. “I missed you so much.”

Teryn allowed herself a few stolen moments of watching the sun rise in the sky. For a few moments, no one needed her to do anything and she could just be. The universe wasn’t in balance, but her corner of it could wait and allow her to take a breath.

Or three.

There was so much that needed to be dealt with: the children they had brought back, the fate of the Tribe from Taris, where the children had been headed, and what would happen with Vha.

The question of Vha was so big and so painful, it hurt to even think about.

But for the moment, she could allow herself to be happy. Her rock still stood, and they were together, and they would raise their warrior.

Everything else could wait. Just for a bit. For her little family she needed to see Sadet, she needed to collect Lypatri and her things and bring them to Lypatri’s room, and see what else the kid needed… maybe eat something? When was the last time she ate?

She honestly couldn’t remember. But first things first. Teryn headed for the Samaki forge. If Rima was in, she could give her a quick report. But not, she smiled to herself, not everything. Some things could be private, just for now.

But she was Teryn Djarin of Clan Lytau, and nothing could change that.

It was shading into midmorning before she finally went to the Forge, a breakfast roll in one hand and mug of caff in the other. Sadet was looking at some armor that needed repair and looked up when she entered.

“He awake?” She nodded, then tilted her head, squinting slightly in a question. He shrugged. “You wouldn’t be here eating if he wasn’t. Bring me his armor so I can fix it.”

She nodded. She always suspected he paid more attention to people than he let on. “We need something else. We need an amulet for-”

“Ah, yes.” He moved over to a row of cabinets and pulled out a shiny new mythosaur amulet. “Used some of the beskar your Alor gave us, along with some of ours.” There were subtle swirls in the metal from the forge welding; one piece, metal from two sources. “Made it for you while you were gone. How old is she?”

Teryn looked up from the amulet. “Around 8.”

“Time for a training helmet then. Bring her to get one fit.” Sadet turned back to the armor he’d been working on before Teryn could do something so embarrassing as thank him.

Teryn glanced at Rima’s office door- it was shut, which meant either that she wasn’t there or didn’t want to be disturbed. Either way, Teryn gave Sadet’s back a nod and left the Forge, tucking the amulet into her belt pouch.

Of course it would be time for Lypatri to get a training helmet. She needed to start training her neck muscles and get used to the range of motion. Teryn knew that. She remembered getting her first helmet and how excited she was about it- she’d been six and so excited to be just like her ori’vod.

She should have been prepared for this when they’d decided to adopt Lypatri. She should have been… but she wasn’t. Not completely, not at all. Being a buir was going to be a bit more complicated than she’d thought. She took a deep breath and went to find Lypatri.

She found her Kurs’ika listlessly poking at the dirt at the edge of one of the fields where a bunch of kids were playing- it appeared that the Covert children were teaching the rescued kids that were healthy enough to play some game that seemed to have malleable rules.

Teryn sat down next to her and offered a bite of her breakfast roll. Lypatri took it and looked up at Teryn fearfully and Teryn smiled at her. “Did he wake up?”

“I think the mythosaur helped.”

Lypatri started to cry and didn’t resist when Teryn put an arm around her. “We should get your stuff, so you can move into your room.”

“Really?”

“Mmhmmm. Do you still want us to be your buire?”

Lypatri nodded quickly and rubbed a grubby fist over her eyes.

Teryn smiled again. “Okay. Then we’ll do that, too. Come on.”

“Now?”

“Not right now, he’s napping, but yes. Today.” They went to Saojeme’s quarters where Lypatri packed up the few things she had. Some clothes, a basic reader, and her training knife. Teryn raised an eyebrow. “They let you keep that?”

Lypatri wrinkled her nose and shook her head. “They didn’t ask for it back.”

Teryn shrugged. Saojeme was there and Lypatri thanked her for keeping an eye on her. Saojeme just gave Lypatri a hug and a knitted blanket and told her to “keep that Tadasco boy on his toes.” Teryn controlled her smile. Lypatri nodded seriously.

In their quarters, Teryn looked around Lypatri’s room and frowned. They needed to get bedding from stores and a lamp. Maybe a plant? Something to make this room Lypatri’s personal space. Not that Teryn had much in the way of personal items herself… she sighed, thinking again about the microscope she’d abandoned on Panoog.

Well, there was the carved wooden songbird Cuan had made.

“We’ll get you some more things, ad’ika.”

“I don’t need anything else.” Lypatri carefully put her book on the shelf. Teryn kept her peace, but was already thinking of other things this kid needed. Perhaps as many stuffies as Jha’iil had was overkill, but she needed more than one.

“Should we go and see if he’s awake?” Lypatri nodded and while they were walking to the medbay, she tucked her hand into Teryn’s belt. Teryn put a comforting hand at her back. This wasn’t the first scared kid she’d ever had to take to see a parent, but it was different when it was your own kid and your own riduur.

Roccan gave them a nod and a smile when they walked in and Lypatri suddenly got shy and hid behind Teryn, peeping out around her elbow. “He just woke up again a little while ago. Asked for something to eat, but I told him not until you said it was okay.”

“How’d he take that?”

“Grouchily.”

Teryn huffed back a laugh. “Of course he did. When he’s ready…”

“...clear broth.”

Teryn and Roccan exchanged identical looks of _I know you know but I had to say it._ “I’ll let you know. Thank you.”

She and Lypatri went to Cuan’s room and Teryn nodded at the door. “Go ahead.” Lypatri stood in front of the door, and with a hand that was shaking only a little, knocked on the door and opened it.

Cuan looked up and gave her a big smile. Lypatri smiled back, then ducked behind Teryn again, burying her face in Teryn’s back. Teryn smiled at him. “I think we’re having a lot of big feelings today,” she said.

“Understandable,” he smiled back. “Come here, ad’ika. I want to see your eyebrows.”

“Don’t got any,” Lypatri mumbled and peeped out again. “I’m glad you’re okay.” Teryn gave her a little nudge and Lypatri went to the bed. Cuan ran his thumb over where her eyebrows should be and grinned.

“I’m sorry I missed your first time blowing off your eyebrows, but I’m gonna guess that this won’t be the last time, cyar’ika.”

Lypatri giggled and shook her head. Then she glanced at Teryn and sobered. Teryn shrugged. “Make sure everyone comes back with all their limbs and that you mess up differently and better each time.”

Cuan laughed. “And you thought raising Foundlings with me was going to be a disaster?” Teryn grinned at him and gave him a nod, patting her belt pouch. He looked at Lypatri. “You still want us to adopt you?”

Lypatri nodded.

“Okay.” He struggled to sit up, and Teryn helped him shift so he could sit on the edge of the bed. “What this means is you’ll be our child, in every way that matters. We will raise you, teach you, make sure you’re taken care of, that you’re fed and clothed and are able to make your way as a Mandalorian. Giving you a name gives you a soul, and binds you to the Manda. We chose you, and you chose us. Do you understand?”

“So… you can’t change your mind?”

“No.”

“And I can’t change mine.”

“You can,” Teryn said. “There’s a thing called ‘dar’buir’ where a child can divorce themselves from their parents. If you’re anything like me, you’ll threaten it at least five times before you’re twelve.” Cuan raised his eyebrows at her and she shrugged, sitting down next to him. “Puberty was hell for everyone.” He rolled his eyes.

Lypatri looked between them both and nodded again. “Okay.”

Cuan took Lypatri’s head in his hands. “Ni kyr'tayl gai sa'ad, Lypatri Tadasco of Clan Lytau.” _I know your name as my child._ He let go, and Teryn’s hands replaced his.

“Ni kyr'tayl gai sa'ad, Lypatri Tadasco of Clan Lytau.” They put the mythosaur amulet over her head and Lypatri looked down at it. “It was made just for you. Someday, I’ll explain what makes it so special.” Lypatri touched the swirls in the metal.

Teryn brought Lypatri over to Din and Jha’iil’s quarters. She wanted Cuan to stay the night in the medbay, just to make sure. But it was important that Din know that he was officially a ba’vodu. Everyone they met saw the amulet and gave Lypatri congratulations. Lypatri kept her hand on Teryn’s belt- excited but anxious about all this attention.

Teryn could understand that.

Jha’iil was awake, but barely. Teryn put her hands on Lypatri’s shoulders and smiled down. “I’d like to introduce you to my ad, Lypatri Tadasco of Clan Lytau.” Din tilted his head, and Teryn shrugged. “We decided we didn’t want to wait until after the riduurok celebration. It wasn’t fair.”

Din nodded. He agreed with that. “Congratulations, vod’ad. Now that you’re aliit -officially-” he shot Teryn a look that she could read through the helmet, “-my name is Din Djarin, and this-” He gestured at the sleepy Jha’iil who was contemplating a cracker. “This is Jha’iil Djarin.”

Lypatri nodded and then turned to look at Teryn. “Buir? ...Bu? I don’t know your name.”

Teryn smiled. “Teryn.” She tucked one of Lypatri’s curls back. “Remember what I told you about being protective of people’s names.”

Lypatri nodded. “I remember. I won’t tell anyone.”

Din gave her an approving nod and looked at Teryn. “I have a carton of things he got for her on Nevarro-” then something flashed on his vambrace. He tapped a control, and hissed. “It’s Iruz’zake. She needs help.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ELOPE YOU CRAZY KIDS. 
> 
> For the marriage itself, the celebration isn't neccesary. From a community building standpoint, from a "fuck you, everything and everyone that has tried to kill us, we're still here" standpoint, the celebration is important. But for the two people involved, all they need to do is say the vows. So they did. 
> 
> Ryll (twi'lek language) translation:
> 
> Sama: Daughter
> 
> Mando'a translations:
> 
> mesh'la: Beautiful  
> al'verde: Commander  
> Kurs'ika: Wolf Cub  
> LaarSenaar: Songbird  
> ba'buir: Grandparent  
> vod'ad: sibling's child   
> shu'shuk: disaster  
> Gar kar’taylir darasuum: I love you  
> Ner: my  
> Cyare: beloved  
> kurs'khaded: wolf  
> Ruus: rock  
> Kar'ta: heart, star  
> riduur: spouse  
> riduurok: love bond, specifically between spouses - marriage agreement  
> ad'ika: little one  
> ori'vod: older sibling  
> gai bal Manda: adoption ceremony, lit. name and soul  
> Vod'ika: Younger sibling  
> Beroya: Bounty hunter  
> Vod: sibling, comrade.   
> al'baar'ur: Doctor  
> buir: parent (plural: buire. diminutive: Bu)  
> cyar'ika: sweetheart, darling  
> Manda: the collective soul or heaven - the state of being Mandalorian in mind, body and spirit - also supreme, overarching, guardian-like  
> dar’buir: no longer a parent (legal term - parental divorce by child)  
> aliit: family, clan


	38. She is broken and won't ask for help

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All Teryn wants is to spend time with her family. 
> 
> Duty calls and nothing is simple.

“It’s Iruz’zake. She needs help.”

Teryn’s hands tightened on Lypatri’s shoulders.

“When I first brought her to Dantooine, we set up a way for her to call for help in case the people who… owned her...found her. It’s been years.” Din looked around frantically. “I have to go.”

Teryn nodded, and held one arm out to Jha’iil. “Do you want me to-”

Jha’iil screamed.

Lypatri ducked behind Teryn again, covering her ears. Teryn reached behind her back to give Lypatri a comforting squeeze and looked at Din, eyes wide. He looked down at Jha’iil who was staring up at him, tears beginning to pour down his cheeks. Jha’iil started to shake his head. “Nonononononono!”

“Ad’ika, it’s not…” Jha’iil, tired as he was, launched himself at Din’s chest. “Nayc, Buir! NAYC.” He clung to Din’s cuirass. “Cuyolir! STAY.”

“I have to go, ad’ika. You remember Zake, don’t you?” Din splayed a hand across Jha’iil’s back. “She needs help and I need to go help her. It won’t be long, you can stay here with your-”

Jha’iil shoved one of his hands up under Din’s helmet and scrabbled around until he could pull the cowl down enough to touch bare skin. Din staggered back. Teryn stepped forward to help him and he held up a hand. “No-” She stepped back, keeping a protective hand on Lypatri, worry etched all over her face.

Jha’iil’s hand slipped down and Din looked down at him. He sighed. “He’s coming.”

Teryn nodded slowly. “...okay…”

“He’s scared that if I go without him, I won’t come back.” Din hung his head. “I’ve left him behind too much.” He settled Jha’iil on his shoulder. Teryn nodded worriedly. To be fair to Jha’iil, Din left him behind once and came back injured, and then left again shortly afterwards. And they’d only been back for less than two days. Of course Jha’iil didn’t want to be separated again.

But who knew what kind of mess Din would be walking into this time? Yes, they’d gotten into and out of all sorts of messy situations together mostly unscathed. Yes, Din could take care of himself, mostly.

That didn’t mean she wasn’t going to worry.

“What do you need?”

“Everything should be on the ship.” Din grabbed his blasters and the Amban rifle and headed for the door. “Tell alor that I’ll be back.” He started for the door, then looked back, “I’ll try to be back in time.” _In time for the wedding,_ he meant, and then he and Jha’iil went out the door, going for the landing fields at a quick pace.

Teryn frowned at the door, then looked down at Lypatri. “I don’t know if everything is really still on the ship.”

Lypatri looked up with big eyes. “Who’s Iruz’zake?”

“She’s a friend of your ba’vodu’s. She helped us rescue the other kids.” Teryn brushed one of Lypatri’s curls again. “You remember the woman who gave you the amulet? And helped you escape?” Lypatri nodded. “We were able to rescue her, too. Can I tell her that you’re here?”

Lypatri nodded, then wrapped her fingers back around Teryn’s belt. “Can you tell her thank you? Vor entye?”

Teryn nodded. “Of course.” She frowned worriedly as the Razor Crest lifted off. She didn’t really want to talk to the Armorer or anyone else. She wanted to spend time with her little family, get Lypatri settled in, and be with Cuan. She sighed and stroked Lypatri’s hair again. “Come on, ad’ika. Duty calls.”

Faris refused to leave Vha’s side, even as she drifted in and out of sleep. She would rouse enough to take a few bites of food and then drift off again, and Faris stayed. Watchful.

At one point, Teryn peeked in and gave Faris a quick nod to join her out in the hall. “It’s good for her that you’re here. Thank you.” She frowned to herself. “Has your buir come to find you?”

Faris shook his head and shuffled his feet. “What’s going to happen to her?”

Teryn shook her head. “I don’t know. Once she’s healed and strong… I don’t know. Alor knows… our Alor. I don’t know about the other alor, but…” she shrugged helplessly. “I don’t know what will happen, but I’ll fight for what she wants.”

“I don’t want to lose her again.”

“I know you don’t. I hope… I hope we can think of something.” Teryn gave his arm a gentle squeeze, and headed out to deal with the next thing on her list. Faris went back into Vha’s room.

“Who were you talking to?”

“The al’baar’ur.”

“The dar’manda.” Vha moved her spoon through the broth. It was good but she had no appetite.

“Yeah, well. That wasn’t her fault.” Faris grimaced as Vha’s eyes flicked to him, then away. “I mean, what happened to you wasn’t your fault either.”

“Maybe it was. I should have been able to fight them off.” Vha whispered. “I should have been stronger.”

“Is… is our ori’vod really dead?” Faris hadn’t wanted to ask, but he needed to know.

Vha nodded slowly. “We were trying to lead a bunch of them away to the lava river, but there were so many….” She swallowed. “And he… he went down. And then they…they took… they took my...”

Faris growled.

“I should have been able to stop them. I should have fought harder, I should have… I was just so.. When I saw Vayez go down, I just froze and…” she shuddered. “I could have stopped them and I didn’t.”

“Ori’vod…”

“Go away. _Please_ go away, I don’t want…” Vha buried her face in her hands. “Buir is right to be ashamed of me.”

The hard thing, Teryn thought, about keeping the fact that you just got married a secret, is that people just expect you to be normal. Oh sure, they were congratulatory over Lypatri, as they should be, and expected her to be a bit fragile over Cuan’s injuries, which she was, but the only one who _knew_ was Tuathal, and that was only because they couldn’t keep it a secret from him. Not even Lypatri knew.

But it meant that she could worry about Faris and Vha. Their situation was so much different than hers and Din’s had been, but it was hard not to see the echoes. And, she had to admit in a shameful corner of her mind, she was jealous that Faris was jumping to defend Vha right away. She knew full well that at least part of that was because of her and her very existence among the Tribe. But it was still a little hard when Din had spent ten years (and two days) believing the worst of her.

It wasn’t fair, not to any of them, but there it was.

She looked towards the Nevarro building, frowning in thought, then turned to go find Rima. Rima should know what was brewing and, besides, she needed to know that they’d officially adopted Lypatri.

Rima was in her office with Ademe and gave Teryn a smile when she knocked. “Come in, come in. I heard he’s awake.”

“Probably -hopefully- napping again, but yes.” Teryn gave a genuine smile. “He’s going to be okay.”

“Any word on Cormu?”

“Still touch and go. We’ll see.” Teryn paused. “We wanted to let you know that we did do the gai bal manda for Lypatri, so that’s all taken care of.”

Rima smiled back. “Good, good. She was anxious while you were both gone.”

“I’m sure that will not be the only time she needs to be pulled from a blast crater.”

“Probably not. She’s a good kid.” Rima looked down at the notes on her desk. “We’ve found that most of the children were taken from Corellia, so we’ll be taking them back there. Most of them have said they have families, so we should be able to reunite them.”

“That’s good.” Adding another 42, no, Teryn amended, 41, children to the Covert would be a strain on everyone. They’d do it if they had to, of course, but if these children had families that were looking for them… Teryn glanced up at Rima. “You might want to warn the authorities on Corellia. The Empire propaganda about Mandolorians being child thieves penetrated deep there and people believed it, even among the Rebel alliance. Who knows what bullshit the New Republic believes.”

Rima nodded sadly while Ademe snorted in disgust. “They called us child thieves while they were the ones- Fuckers, they stole our-” Ademe started to pace. “They accused us of everything they were doing and that was why they said we had to be exterminated. Called us a cult, and-” she cut herself off.

Rima turned to Teryn. “We also just got word from Solde. She’s on her way back, and she’ll have a patient for you. An ik’aad, maybe around two years old.. She should be back by morning.”

Teryn nodded, looked down at her fingers, twisting anxiously, then looked up. “There’s something else.”

Rima glanced at Ademe. _Do you think this has to do with why the other Tribe has been so tense?_ “Go on.”

“The woman we rescued. I’m sure it occurred to you that she might be -might have been- Mando’ade. She is. She’s from our…” Teryn took a deep breath. “She’s one of ours.”

Rima and Ademe exchanged horrified looks. “What happened?”

“She was assumed to have been killed in the attack on Nevarro. And… she wasn’t. She hasn’t been in a place to answer any questions yet but…” Teryn took another steadying breath. “She was one of the al’verde’s Foundlings, and he’s not…”

“No, he wouldn’t take well to one of his children being dar’manda, would he.” Rima sighed. “Tragic. Well, she can obviously stay here until she’s able to move on.”

Teryn stilled and her eyes narrowed slightly. “Move on?”

Rima held Teryn’s gaze for several heartbeats. “She won’t want to stay here, of course. No one who is truly dar’manda would want to. Remind them of what they’ve lost?”

Teryn frowned. She did. She had made a choice to stay. “I don’t… Are you telling me that you’ll send her on her way?”

“She can stay as long as she likes. But she’ll want to move on. They all do.”

Teryn nodded slowly, feeling the tension in her jaw. “The mythosaur amulet she gave to Kurs'ika. Where is it?”

“I believe your alor has it. Why?”

“I want to give it back to her. She managed to keep it through everything. She gets to decide what she does with it.” Teryn turned on her heel and stalked away, taking a deep breath before heading over to the Nevarro Forge. Besides the amulet, she needed to let the Armorer know that Din had left.

Just outside the Forge, she found Cara, sipping a large mug of something and cleaning her weapons. “Hey, T. Where’s your brother?”

Teryn blinked at her- truthfully, she’d forgotten that Cara was even around. So much had happened. “Um, he… had to leave.”

Cara scowled. “He didn’t even tell me?”

Teryn shrugged helplessly. “He got a message from Zake that she needed help, some sort of arranged code? And he left immediately. Like, ran out the door and onto the Crest.”

“Where’s the kid?”

“Went with him. Refused to let him go off by himself.”

Cara shook her head. “If there’s trouble, he might need backup. He should have gotten me.”

Teryn shrugged again. Cara wasn’t wrong and if Din hadn’t been so frantic, they could have planned a lot better. But he was frantic. “Hopefully the hyperspace trip will calm him down. He said he’d try to be back as soon as he could.”

Cara nodded. “You looked like you were on your way somewhere.”

“I am.” Teryn turned the Forge, then turned back. “My brother said that there was a carton of things for our Foundling? Do you know if they made it off the ship?”

Cara nodded. “Yeah, I brought them in. I think it’s in his rooms somewhere?” She stood up. “If he’s not there, I can go look, right?” Without waiting for an answer, Cara headed towards the Nevarro building.

Teryn, in turn, resumed her stalk into the Forge. The Armorer wasn’t working, for once, but sitting at her table, lost in thought. Protocol would dictate that Teryn should sit down and wait until she was spoken to.

Protocol could go fuck itself.

“Where’s the amulet?” Teryn snapped, folding her arms. The Armorer looked up at her but didn’t move orreact further.“ Vha Vizsla’s amulet. Where is it?”

“I-”

“I know that you know that she is sitting in that medbay wondering why her buir won’t acknowledge her. That somehow she’s come back- You must have suspected there was a chance she wasn’t dead. If you or that fucking piece of shit of an al’verde had bothered to visit her…” Teryn snarled. “He doesn’t deserve to be anyone’s buir.”

“He is in pain.”

“His daughter is in pain! You didn’t see her face when he turned his back on her! You didn’t hear her say that they told her that everyone was dead! She’s been mourning you and everyone else for over a year, and all you can do is-” Teryn cut herself off, realizing that her voice had been rising steadily until she was yelling. “You don’t know what she’s been through. None of us do. The fucking very least you could bestir yourself to do is let her have back the one thing she managed to hold onto. How dare you. You call yourself an alor.”

The Armorer simply sat, taking Teryn’s tirade in, then she stood, walked over to her bench, and found the amulet. It was hard to tell because most amulets didn’t have maker’s marks, but it had seemed like one her Forgemaster might have made back on Concordia. She handed it to Teryn silently and Teryn, with an angry nod, took it and strode out.

She saw Ordo out of the corner of her eye start to approach, then stop, do a complete turnaround, and walk away. More than one person between her and the medbay scuttled off to the side. The only thing that pulled her out of her rage was Lypatri running over and then skidding to an uncertain stop at the sight of Teryn’s face.

Teryn stopped and took a deep breath, then another and turned to face her Foundling.

“Are you mad?”

“Not at you, ad’ika.” Teryn held out her hand and after a long pause, Lypatri took it. “Other things made me mad but you make me happy, especially today.”

“Can we go see… go see Buir?” Lypatri whispered the last word, like if she said it too loud it would waft away. Teryn nodded and Lypatri tucked her fingers into Teryn’s belt. Cuan was awake and scowling at the bowl of broth he’d been served, but smiled at them.

“Can I have a real dinner?”

“No.” Teryn gave him a quick scan. “How do you feel?”

“Like I want real food.” He looked up hopefully. “Or that I can sleep in my own bed tonight. One or the other.”

Teryn gave him a mock glare. “I see how it is. Maybe.” Real food was out of the question at the moment. But everything was reading as normal. Everything was functioning as normal. He was tired, yes, but who wouldn’t be? He could rest just as easily in their own quarters and would definitely be more comfortable.

But it was hard to reconcile with the fact that she’d had her hands inside him, putting him back together, less than two days before. She just didn’t have much experience with this kind of healing. Being on the receiving end of it was very different.

“You look tense, LaarSenaar.”

She gave him a smile. “Tired. And there hasn’t been a moment to sit down and… just be. I want to spend time with the two of you, but…”

“Duty.” He held out an arm to beckon her closer.

“Duty.” Teryn sighed, sitting next to him. “A lot has been happening today.” She filled him in on Din’s sudden departure and a very edited version of her conversation with the Armorer. “Shit, I never did tell her that he left. And then there’s your alor…”

“”Yours, too, or will be, soon enough…”

Teryn glanced at him, sideways. “She’s graciously allowing our guest to stay until ‘she’s ready to move on.’ I need to go talk to her. I haven’t had a chance to, not really.”

Cuan squeezed her elbow and turned his attention to Lypatri. “And you, ad’ika? How was your day?”

“Pretty good. We got my stuff in my room and someone brought over some other stuff. A pillow, and sheets, like that. No training today because everybody is busy with the other kids.” Lypatri picked up the stuffed mythosaur. “Can I tell you something?”

“Of course, cyar’ika. You can tell us anything.”

“And you won’t be mad?”

Teryn and Cuan exchanged a glance. “Probably not.”

Lypatri looked at them both solemnly, then took a deep breath. “I lied before.”

“About what?”

“I know what planet I’m from.” Her face began to crumple. “I didn’t want anyone to send me back. Please don’t be mad.”

“Oh, ner kar’ta,” Teryn said and tugged Lypatri closer so she could put an arm around her. “We’re not mad about that. We were _never_ going to send you back, but I don’t blame you for being scared.”

Cuan bared his teeth a little. “Now that you know we can’t change our minds and that we’re not mad… please tell us, where are you from?” Teryn shot him a look of perfect understanding.

Faris fell asleep outside Vha’s room. He did not want to leave his ori’vod alone, not even when she told him to go. But it had been a long night and a longer day and he couldn’t stay awake any longer. Tabor had draped a blanket over him, then found Teryn.

“Is it true?”

Teryn had looked at him sadly and that was enough of an answer. Vha was only a few years older than Tabor. They’d know each other well growing up and Tabor’s guilt over surviving when so many of his age mates hadn’t weighed on him. He knew that he was sent with the Foundlings because he was a medic and since the old doctor had eventually died of injuries sustained in the attack, it was to the ultimate good. But that didn’t mean his guilt weighed on him any less.

Teryn nodded and tapped his helmet when he dropped his head. “I’ll tell her that you’re here. She hasn’t asked for an accounting yet, as far as I know, but she had been told everyone was killed. So… I’ll tell her.”

In her room, Vha stared at the window and had no visible reaction when Teryn came in. “I’m not hungry.”

“I don’t expect that you are.” Teryn gave a faint smile at seeing the strill. “I remember when you got that.”

Vha whipped around and stared at Teryn. “Do I _know_ you?”

“I had already sworn when you were brought back to Concordia, but I remember you, following your ori’vod around.” Teryn smiled sadly. “I also remember both of you hiding when we sent the children away and waiting to see which ship your buir was assigned to during the evacuation.”

That had been chaotic, evacuating Concordia during the Purge. The plan had been to send all the children away but a few of them, Vayez and Vha Vizsla included, had other plans. They’d hidden out for the few weeks before the full evacuation and snuck onto the ship Paz had been assigned to. Paz had been equal parts enraged at them and relieved to have his two Foundlings with him.

And then, when they received word that the evacuated children had vanished from their sanctuary, he’d held them tighter still. They still didn’t know what had become of those children.

“Wait… you’re the baar’ur… who… you broke the Creed.” Vha looked at Teryn with a mixture of fear and disgust and longing. Someone who knew her, someone who might _understand_.

Teryn let out a breath before looking back up at Vha. “I didn’t break it. It was broken for me. Rokr lied. He took my helmet and ran home.”

“I remember. My buir… he said…”

“I know what he said.” Vha had been 8 years old when Teryn was excommunicated. Paz would not have kept his opinions to himself and the Foundlings heard everything. Vha would have grown up with Paz’s feelings on people who no longer had helmets etched into her bones.

“And you’re back.” The note of longing. Wishing for a home you were certain you'd never get to come back to, that would never welcome you back. Teryn knew that note well. She’d sung it for years.

“I came back,” Teryn nodded. “It’s a long story. Did your vod’ika tell you where we are?”

Vha nodded slowly. “Another Covert, with another Tribe.”

Teryn took a step forward, then another and held out the amulet. “The child you gave this to is here. She wants you to know that she says thank you. She’s just been…” Teryn paused, and smiled. “I just adopted her. Her name is Lypatri. And she owes you her life.”

Vha stared at the amulet in Teryn’s hand, then up at Teryn, eyes beginning to fill. “...you? They let you?”

Teryn nodded. More than once during the day she couldn’t quite believe everything that had happened. She, who six months before had no one but a loth cat, had a Tribe- two Tribes if one wanted to be technical about it- a riduur, and a Foundling. A family. A life.

“If you were the baar’ur… that means the beroya was your ori’vod…” Vha frowned, trying to piece together the relationships. Even before the Purge, familial relationships were complicated and overlapping. Slowly, hesitantly, she took back her amulet and held it.

“Yes. He is here, too. Along with the Foundling you helped keep safe. You don’t have to see them yet, not if you don’t want to, but they’re here. Along with several other people from our Tribe. I know it’s hard to face them. It’s one of the hardest things you’ll ever do, trust me, I know that. But you survived, Vha Vizsla. You _lived._ And you get to decide what that means from now on.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mando'a Translations
> 
> Ad’ika: Little one  
> Nayc: NO  
> Cuyolir: Stay  
> ba’vodu: Parent's sibling  
> Vor entye: Thank you (lit: I accept a debt)  
> buir: Parent  
> alor: Chief  
> al’baar’ur: Doctor  
> dar’manda: a state of not being Mandalorian - not an outsider, but one who has lost his heritage, and so his identity and his soul - regarded with absolute dread by most traditional-minded Mando'ade  
> ori’vod: Older sibling  
> gai bal manda: adoption ceremony (lit: name and soul)  
> ik’aad: baby, child under 3  
> Mando’ade: Child of Mandalore  
> al’verde: commander  
> LaarSenaar: Songbird  
> cyar'ika: sweetheart  
> ner kar’ta: My heart, my love  
> baar’ur: medic  
> riduur: spouse  
> beroya: Bounty hunter


	39. If you love me, don't let go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which aspects of parenthood are considered. And a strill has a name.

Vha stared at Teryn for several long breaths. Her entire focus up to this point had been getting through the next day, the next hour, the next minute. Escape had been tried and seemed impossible. Sending the child out had been born of utter desperation.

The mercs had arrived with a new batch of children and Vha had overheard one of them saying that he’d seen a Mandalorian nearby. “Had the look of a bounty hunter.” Vha had pulled the amulet she’d managed to keep hidden, against all odds, from around her neck, then grabbed a child not entirely at random -she could recognize a fighting spirit when she saw one. Hoping the child could find the Mandalorian was a long shot, she knew, but it was the only thing she could think of.

She had no faith that the New Republic would help the children. She held onto the slenderest of threads that Mandalorians would. It required that the child find the Mandalorian, that the Mandalorian would help the child, that the Mandalorian was part of a Tribe that was large enough to take the risk. There were so many ifs and Vha hadn’t dared believe that if it all worked, they’d rescue her, too.

She’d considered so many options, but she couldn’t get to the weapons supplies and every time she’d done anything that was even the slightest bit out of line, they’d use the shock collar. Sometimes they did it just for fun.

Deep in the darkest recesses of her mind, she had hoped that her Buir would come and bring her out of this hell. But she had been told he was dead along with all the rest of her Tribe. She never dared think about the beroya, the one they’d exposed themselves to rescue. The last time she’d seen him, he was running to his ship with the tiny child- a Foundling, now, apparently. If she thought about him, she’d drown in either rage or longing.

Or both.

It was hard to not be angry at what the cost had been. It wasn’t as high as she’d been told, but somehow that made her personal share of feel heavier. _This is the Way_ , she thought, the words feeling like ashes.

She was safe, in theory. In the same place as her family, if she still had one.

And she was looking into the kind, sad, haunted eyes of a woman she’d heard her Buir describe as a faithless coward with no honor, who gave up everything. Wearing armor, having adopted the child, by all appearances a full and respected member of the Tribe.

“You don’t have to decide right now what you want to do. In fact, you shouldn’t. You need to rest and heal.” Teryn nodded down at the stuffed strill. “But your vod’ika is sleeping outside your door.”

“Alor knows I’m here?”

“She does.” Teryn smiled a little. “I might have yelled at her.” Vha’s eyes widened. One did not _yell_ at the Armorer. Not ever. Teryn smiled reassuringly and checked the readings on the monitors. “It looks like you’re healing well. How are your ribs feeling?”

Vha shrugged. “Fine.”

“Mmmhmmm. I think we’re going to keep you on liquids for a few days more. It’ll be a bit before your system can handle real food.” Teryn slid her eyes over to Vha and said with gentle understanding, “And when you just don’t feel like real food, smoothies are a good option. I lived on them for a while.”

“You said it had been eleven years.”

“Yes.” Give or take.

“When did you come back?”

“About…” Teryn frowned. “Less than six months ago.” Was it only six months ago that she had followed Din into the Covert on Jelucan, terrified of what would happen? She never, not once, would have expected any of this to have followed from that one impulsive decision to return. She’d almost expected to be killed on the spot.

“Is it horrible?” Being back, being among those who you could never really rejoin.

“It’s hard. I’m not going to lie. Sometimes it was almost unbearable. But it’s better than the half-life I was living before.”

“Was?”

“It got better.” Teryn’s smile grew a bit wistful, thinking of who was just down the hall. She turned her full attention back to Vha. “We’ll find a place for you. You’re not alone.”

“Who… can you tell me who survived?”

“All the foundlings, most of their buire, including, well…” Teryn inclined her head to mean _including yours._ “The old al’baar’ur was injured in the evacuation and died a few months later. Fortunately his apprentice was also with them. He’s here, too. Oh, and the skraan’ur. We found him on Canto just over a month ago.”

Vha poked at her cold broth, but didn’t respond other than a slight nod. Teryn tilted her head. “You should know, in case your vod’ika didn’t tell you, this other Tribe is more relaxed. They give their names and they don’t wear helmets while in their Covert. I asked everyone who came to see you to wear theirs because one shock at a time is plenty. But you’ll see people without helmets.”

Vha nodded slowly. “He mentioned.”

“I don’t want to push but they will want to talk to you. They want to know what happened.” Teryn gave a small, sympathetic smile as Vha slid her eyes over to her, worried. “The other alor here isn’t an asshole and I’ll be with you, if you want.” Vha nodded, shoulders relaxing slightly. “Should I have someone bring you a smoothie? It’ll be tastier than cold broth.” Vha sighed and nodded again.

“Can you tell my vod’ika it’s okay if he wants to come back in?” She chewed on her lip. “And if your…if your Foundling wants to… I’d like to meet her, too.”

Teryn left Vha and Faris and went back to Cuan’s room where she’d left him and Lypatri chatting about the advantages of different makes of blasters. She knew very well that raising Lypatri wasn’t going to be simple, but the kid had a good heart, had a blend of fearlessness and recklessness that was bound to turn them both gray, and if nothing else, it wouldn’t be boring.

The room was empty.

Teryn let her breath out slowly, counted to three, then inhaled again. Out in the hall, one of the other medics was walking by and she grabbed their arm. “Where are they?”

“They… he told me that you said he could go back to your quarters.” The medic quailed as Teryn’s eyes turned dark and angry.

“Did he.” She tilted her head and hissed. “And you didn’t check with me?”

“I….he said you cleared it.”

“Did he walk?” If he tried to walk, he would be collapsed in a heap just outside the doors.

“No… Roccan took him in a chair…” the medic trailed off into uncertainty when Teryn whirled away and left the medbay. Why the fuck did they live so far away? What was he thinking? She had said maybe he could go back home. _Maybe._ She hadn’t said anything to any of the other medical staff and who the fuck did that pissant medic think he was in allowing it? And Roccan! Roccan should have _known_ better.

She hit the door control with more force than was necessary and stalked into her -their- quarters and pulled up short. Cuan was sitting on the couch, blanket tucked around his legs. Lypatri was perched on one side with Atin, the traitor, curled up on the other and they were looking at holos.

“...and this is Arkil showing Atriu how to use a sniper-” He paused and looked up as Teryn scowled at him and gave her a bright smile. “She found us.” Lypatri shrank back a bit into the couch as Teryn scowled harder.

“What are you doing here.”

“I told you she’d be mad.” Cuan whispered loudly to Lypatri.

“I am mad. I didn’t okay this.” She narrowed her eyes. “You must have called them as soon as I went out the door, and you’re… you just...” To her horror, her voice started to tremble and the tears started welling up.

Cuan turned off the holo and set it aside. “Hey, hey…” He tried to stand up, but the effort was a lot. Too much. “Look, I’m…”

“You’re NOT. I had to…” she looked at him, knowing that she should try to hold it together so as not to scare Lypatri, that she shouldn’t yell but- “You almost died. You would have _died_. And then… then where...” The sound that ripped from her chest was part sob and part hysterical laugh, entirely mortifying.

“I was not going to. I had no intention. Come here, cyare.” He held out his hand, beckoning. She looked at him and staggered forward, one step, then two, before collapsing into his chest.

All the relief, the anger, the fear, mingled with the pure happiness came out in huge, deep, racking sobs as she clutched at his arms. He held her and let her cry it out, burying his face into her hair and stroking the back of her neck over and over, the only bare skin he could touch.

Lypatri looked at them both with big eyes and a worried expression. Cuan slid his eyes over to his ad’ika. “It’s okay, cyar’ika. Your bu has had a long day and a lot of feelings and sometimes it comes out like this.” Lypatri nodded slowly, then sidled over and put her head on Teryn’s back, wrapping one small arm around Teryn’s waist. Teryn cried harder, clutching her little family as hard as she could.

“It’s okay, ner cyare, let it out, we’re here. We’re all here.”

Din stared out into the lights of hyperspace. In retrospect, there was at least one good thing about Jha’iil insisting that he come along- holding his child helped ground Din. Being forced to focus on Jha’iil helped keep him from doomspiraling.

When he had first brought Zake to Dantooine, the odds that she would be tracked by the slavers she had escaped from had been high. High enough that they had arranged a way for her to signal him if she needed help. She hadn’t ever had the need to use it, until now.

Of course he was going to help her. Of course he was going to. If it wasn’t her former captors, then it was something else and she would never, ever have used the signal if the need hadn’t been dire.

He looked down at Jha’iil, curled up on his chest, claws hanging onto the cuirass even in sleep. He shouldn’t have been angry at Teryn for what Jha’iil had done, but he’d just been so scared to find him gone. He’d had so many nightmares of not being able to find his son that he’d completely lost it. And Jha’iil… he was simply scared for his Buir to leave him. Again.

Din sighed, his hand rubbing small circles on Jha’iil’s back. It was a hard choice to make every time, whether to take him or to leave him. He knew that the kid would be okay with Teryn, that he’d be well-loved and cared for, and Din wouldn’t have to worry about his safety. But what he’d forgotten in his sudden, bone-deep panic over Iruz’zake, was that Jha’iil worried about _him._

When the kid had put his hand to Din’s skin, he was able to feel everything- the fear, the uncertainty. Having Din was the most stable thing in Jha’iil’s life and the thought of Din leaving again so suddenly was too much. Din couldn’t blame him for that. Jha’iil had been with him through many dangerous situations. They could make it through this one.

He’d just been scared. It wasn’t unreasonable.

“I’m here, ad’ika, we’re together. We’re going to go get her, find out what’s happened, and then we’re gonna go home.” Din smiled as he ran a finger down Jha’iil’s nose. “Yaim.” Jha’iil wrinkled his nose, muttered in his sleep, and snuggled deeper into Din’s neck.

Teryn had cried herself into exhaustion but managed to rouse herself enough to get Lypatri tucked into bed- thank the stars they’d had the good sense to make it earlier that day. No one was in a state to deal with getting sheets onto the bed. Lypatri had regarded Teryn anxiously and Teryn gave her a smile. “I’m okay, Kurs’ika. Sleep well, ner kar’ta.” Lypatri nodded, snuggled under the blanket from Saojeme and with the mythosaur tucked in her arm.

Getting Cuan to bed was a bit easier and he’d fallen asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow. Teryn sat up, watching him sleep for a long time, watching his breathing. This sleep was normal, sprawling, and more than once he’d reached for her, settling only when his hand came into contact with some part of her body.

Finally, she curled up next to him where she could hear his heart beating and feel the rise and fall of his chest, finally allowing herself to drift off when one of his hands came up to her head, fingers tangling in her hair.

Some time later, when it was still full dark, she woke up with a headache. _You of all people should know to hydrate after a hysterical crying jag like that._ She carefully extracted herself, and looked down. Her riduur was still sound asleep, breathing, heart beating, just like he should be. She reached to touch his face then stopped- she didn’t want to disturb him. Even if it seemed like nothing short of a stampede of mythosaurs could possibly wake him, it wasn’t worth the risk.

But he was beautiful.

With a slightly regretful smile she padded to the kitchen unit to get some water, and glanced at the door to Lypatri’s room. It was cracked open and Teryn went to peek in. The bed was empty- no child, no blanket, no mythosaur. Teryn frowned, and looked around the living room. No one, not even Atin, and the refresher was empty. She looked into Lypatri’s room further and spotted her curled up under the desk. Atin was loafed near her feet, watchful.

Teryn sighed to herself. She, better than many, could understand the need to sleep in a small, dark, safe place. Maybe the bed was too soft, maybe it was just a little too stressful right now. After thinking about it, she decided to leave her for the time being. If Lypatri felt safe under the desk, who was Teryn to argue with her about it now? Time enough to discuss it in the morning. Besides, Atin was guarding her. He’d accepted this new kitten into their family.

“Jate, Atin. Vor entye.” Teryn whispered and Atin blinked at her, purring. She smiled at him and went back to her own bed where she could watch her Kurs’khaded sleep. As she expected, he reached for her as soon as she got in the bed, still asleep, and she smiled even as the tears started again. Silently, she cried, and even in sleep, his arms tightened around her, secure and comforting.

When dawn peeked above the edges of the valley, Cuan opened his eyes and gave a small sigh of contentment. In his bed, with his riduur. And already feeling much stronger. He looked down at Teryn, sleeping, using his chest as a pillow. He could feel some dampness under where her face was and stroked her hair. He still wasn’t entirely sure what all had happened. Roccan hadn’t wanted to elaborate with Lypatri there, nor did Cuan want to press the issue for the same reason, but he knew very well that his injuries had been very, very bad- they would have been, to require the bacta tank.

He wasn’t surprised that his Songbird had cried herself to sleep on his chest. She had long been in the habit of keeping her emotions bottled up until they exploded out and the previous day had been full of a lot of big emotions. For all of them.

He kissed her head, content. He laid out the plan and they’d followed it, after a fashion. They’d gotten home, they’d said the vows, they’d adopted their Foundling, and now it was time to continue their lives, together. Eventually they’d have to have the riduurok celebration, but that could wait until everything else was settled. For right now, he had this. And it was pretty good.

It wasn’t much longer before Teryn stirred and woke up. She smiled at him. “Vaar’tur, ner riduur.” He smiled back, stroking beneath her ear. “How do you feel?”

“Are you going to ask me that every morning for the rest of our lives?”

“Probably.” They grinned at each other as the communicator started blaring. She rolled her eyes. “It begins. The other scrapper is supposed to be coming in this morning.”

“Solde?” He asked. She nodded. “They’re all part of your tribe now, you can start using their names.”

She huffed. “Not likely.” She crawled out of the bed and he caught her hand, tugging her closer so he could kiss her palm.

“I owe you my life. I know I do.”

She gave him the tenderest smile he’d ever seen while she stroked his face. “No. We’re even.”

“I wasn’t the one who saved you from Gideon. You did that yourself.”

She ran her thumb over his lips. “That’s not what I mean.”

Teryn tapped on Lypatri’s door to wake her up. She didn’t want to embarrass the kid by finding her under the desk; time enough to address it later, when they were both awake. Kata was on the other end of the communicator, letting her know that Solde was going to be landing in less than an hour.

The food they had in the kitchen unit was… inadequate. Yes, there was caff that she could brew, but this morning required something stronger. She set the behot to steep and turned to see Lypatri, still in her pajamas, holding on to the mythosaur. “Get dressed ad’ika, time to start the day.”

Lypatri nodded at the mug. “What’s that?”

“Behot. It’s an herb that we like to drink. It wakes you up better than caff.”

“Can I try?”

“You can have a sip when it’s done steeping. Go get dressed.” Teryn smiled as Lypatri scampered to her room. They still needed to get the child more clothes and things but she was settling in well, so far. Ten minutes later, they had said goodbye to Cuan, who was given strict instructions to rest himself, and set off for the mess before Lypatri headed for the training rooms and Teryn went to the medbay.

Lypatri took a sip of the behot and wrinkled her nose. “It tastes… kind of grassy.”

Teryn nodded. “It does a bit.” She grinned. “I grew up with it, it tastes like home.” Jha would drink it while helping Teryn with studying, and sometimes, as a treat, she would make Teryn and Din small mugs, cut with hot water. It made them feel very grown up.

“Bu? Can I ask you something?”

Teryn nodded, smiling to herself. Eventually the child would stop asking if she could ask a question. “Of course.”

“Did Cuan -I mean Buir- did he really almost die?”

Teryn stopped and looked down at Lypatri’s anxious face. “Yes.”

“What…. What would have happened to me?”

Teryn stroked Lypatri’s nose. “I would have given you a soul and we would have figured it out.”

“Oh.” Lypatri wrinkled her nose and smiled. “Okay. Rima said...”

“She was going to adopt you if something had gone horribly wrong and neither of us had come back.” Teryn considered her next words carefully. “We should have given you a soul before we left. That wasn’t the right decision and I’m sorry.”

Lypatri blinked. No adult had ever apologized to her before. Not ever. Her lower lip started to tremble but she took a deep breath and nodded.

“None of us would have left you out in the cold, ner kar’ta. We’re all new at this.” Teryn put a hand on Lypatri’s shoulders. Lypatri tucked her fingers in Teryn’s belt and they went to the mess to find breakfast and arrange for someone to bring some food to Cuan. Once they had food, Lypatri trotted off to the training rooms. Even if there wasn’t any training happening, the other kids would congregate there and they’d figure out what trouble they could get into for the day.

Teryn made a beeline to find Roccan. Roccan, to his credit, didn’t try to hide (though he did think about it). “You let him trick you.”

“All the scans indicated he could go home and he was very convincing.”

“You should have checked with me!”

“You’re right.” He held up his hands in surrender. “I should have. Is he okay?”

“He’s fine.” She rolled her eyes. “Annoyingly so.”

“So it worked out.”

“It did.” She scowled at him. “Don’t do it again.” She went out to wait for Solde’s ship. Rima was also waiting, fingers drumming impatiently.

“How’s our guest? What’s her name?” Teryn raised an eyebrow and shot Rima a sideways glare. Rima shrugged. “Had to try. But how is she?”

“She’s agreed to talk to you.”

Rima nodded. “Has her buir-?”

“No. If he hasn’t by the time we’re done with this crisis, I’m going to drag him there by his balls.”

Rima laughed as Solde’s ship cleared the edge of the valley and angled to land near where Rima and Teryn were standing. Solde ran out with the baby in her arms before the engines had powered down completely. Teryn took him. He was asleep and she checked his pulse. “Has he woken up?”

Solde nodded. “A couple of times but not for very long. We stopped at a med center on the way- I wanted to make sure he could make it here. They gave him fluids and showed me how to keep pushing them.”

“Did they ask any awkward questions?” Rima asked, looking at the baby.

Solde paused, taking off her helmet once the baby was handed over. “....no. They wanted me on my way as quickly as possible because of…” she stopped as the strill lumbered out of the ship, still limping. “Well, because of that.”

Teryn’s mouth dropped open and Rima nodded slowly. “I see. You also found a…”

“A strill, yes. I also brought back the bodies of the fallen warriors.” Rima nodded sadly in acknowledgment.

Teryn was about to turn to the medbay to take the baby in when a shriek echoed across the compound. “Edeemir!”

Rima, Teryn, and Solde all exchanged glances. “Bitey?”

One of the Mando’ade children they’d rescued came careening over and flung his arms around the strill’s neck. “Edeemir, they found you!” The strill woofed in joy and sniffed the boy all over, wiggling ecstatically. The other rescued children ran over and the strill sniffed and licked each one in turn, very thoroughly.

One of the older children stood up. “Did you find my buir?”

Solde sighed and knelt down. “I found two warriors that had gone marching away. Was your buir with you when you were taken?”

The boy nodded, sagging a little. “And my vod’ika, too. I suppose he’s marching away, too? The chakaar aruetiise didn’t take him with the rest of us.”

Teryn knelt down next to Solde. “Is this your vod’ika?” She showed the boy the baby and he smiled and nodded, touching the baby’s cheeks. Teryn smiled reassuringly. “I need to give him some medicine and make sure he’s okay. Do you want to come inside and make sure I do a good job?” The boy nodded and turned to follow Teryn inside. The strill made a soft woof and the boy made a sign for him to stay. Edeemir whined but did as he was told. The other children continued to pet him, some of them crying in relief.

Rima looked at Solde. “So not entirely a fruitless trip.”

“Not at all.” Solde shook her head. “I left a coded message. If there’s anyone alive to find it, they’ll be able to contact us.”

Rima nodded her approval. “The children were able to tell us that they split up to try to get off Taris- something happened that wasn’t safe for them. They didn’t have many warriors other than the two you found. The others left around the same time.” She sighed. “Hopefully we’ll hear something. In the meantime,” she looked down at Edeemir. “What do we feed a strill?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The idea of behot tasting a bit like macha appeals to me. 
> 
> "Marching far away" as a euphemism for dead comes from: "Not gone, merely marching far away."
> 
> Mando'a Translations
> 
> Beroya: Bounty hunter  
> Buir: Parent (Plural: buire Diminutive: Bu)   
> Vod'ika: Younger sibling  
> Alor: Chief  
> Skraan'ur: Cook  
> al'baar'ur: Doctor  
> ad'ika: Kid, little one  
> Cyar'ika: sweetheart  
> Cyare: beloved  
> Ner: me, my  
> Yaim: Home  
> Kurs'ika: Wolf cub  
> Ner kar'ta: My heart, my stars  
> Riduur: Spouse  
> Jate: Good  
> Vor entye: Thank you  
> Kurs'khaded: Wolf  
> Vaar'tur: Morning  
> Behot: herb used in beverages, mildly antiseptic and stimulating  
> Edeemir: Bite   
> chakaar aruetiise: Corpse-eating outsiders


	40. I will burn your kingdom down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Din goes to help Zake. Edeemir demonstrates why he has his name. Teryn, Lypatri, and Vha discuss bravery.

Dantooine had bounced back from the war. The spaceport was bustling, the city was full, and commerce was in full swing. Din was able to slide into the traffic pattern to land the Razor Crest with a minimum of fuss.

He grimaced looking at his weapons locker. Cara had put back a few of the things she had borrowed but he was still a bit lower than he liked. He glanced around. It also looked like the baby carrier had been taken out of the ship or was shoved in some unknown corner. He didn’t have time to look, though, and given that he didn’t know what he was walking into, he wanted to keep his hands free.

Din sighed, looking down at Jha’iil. The kid was awake and alert, he’d eaten and was clean and content, but Din had no illusions that leaving the kid on the ship would lead to an epic tantrum. Plus he’d just spend the entire time with part of his focus worrying about Jha’iil and he could not afford that. No, the kid would have to come. Din sighed, spotting the old bag from the confrontation on Nevarro. It was better than nothing.

Jha’iil fussed as Din put him in the bag and Din stroked his nose again. “K’uur, ad’ika. It’s just for this once, okay? I forgot to check if the birikad was here. If you’re good and quiet…”

Jha’iil’s ears went up hopefully. “Ice cream?”

Din sighed. He had walked into that. “Yes, I’ll find you some ice cream. Not as much as your ba’vodu would give you…” He tucked Jha’iil’s travel blanket in the bag, checked his weapons one last time, and left the ship.

The ebb and flow of the crowds shifted to allow him space. Mandalorians were rare but still feared and people would almost instinctively give him space. That was fine. No matter how much a part of him wanted to get to Zake’s establishment as quickly as possible, the more rational part of his brain, the part that had kept him alive through years of bounty hunting and two and a half decades of being a Mandalorian warrior, knew that the safest thing for both himself and Zake was to take a circuitous route.

A couple of times he thought there might be someone tailing him but Jha’iil remained calm. Once he got to the quiet street that Zake’s massage parlor was on, he faded into a doorway to assess the situation.

The door was hanging open, cracked from a large impact. There were no lights on at all, and it had been about twelve hours from the time Din got Zake’s distress call. If she was able to follow the plan they set into place years before, then she would have escaped out through the lower level and gone to a safe house.

Din considered his options, putting a hand on Jha’iil’s head, stroking lightly. Going in the front door would be too exposed for comfort. He wasn’t entirely sure where the lower level entrance came out. The entire space was a work in progress for a while and he had other things on his mind. That left the back door. He had a code to it. He wanted to get a sense of what happened, and if she hadn’t made it out to the safe house....

He slipped back into an alley and circled around to the back door. That door appeared undisturbed but just to be safe, he drew his blaster and stood off to the side to enter the code. He looked down at Jha’iil, who was crouched down into the bag as low as he could, just as he’d been taught to do. “Jate.” Din gave Jha’iil another pat and entered the code.

The door slid open, and nothing happened. Din waited a few minutes, watching with the infrared filter on his HUD, but nothing. No movement, no signs of life. He thought it through. Twelve hours ago would have been the middle of the night. Her living quarters were in the lower level. He’d never been down there, not even when he’d had to spend the night those few times. He’d curled up in one of the massage rooms, where he’d been able to leave quickly, without disturbing her.

And, he only barely admitted to himself, where her presence wouldn’t disturb him. Much.

He slipped in the back door, this time moving soundlessly, going from shadow to shadow. No need to turn on lights when you have night vision. At the front door, there were signs of several boots. The same kind, he noted, that the mercenaries that had been chasing Lypatri wore. That might be a coincidence, or not, but it was a data point. The boots milled around a bit and the front desk had been ransacked, then they all led to the door to the lower level.

Din carefully went down the stairs, thankful that they were well built and didn’t squeak. Normally, when on a job and entering a target's private space, he was able to be detached and clinical about it. This though… this was Zake’s space and she had not invited him in here. Not really. He felt like an invader.

But he wasn’t the first and he smiled grimly at the two bodies lying in the dance studio. Broken mirrors, blood, one shot with a blaster full in the chest, and the other with a shard of glass in the side of his neck.

And he wasn’t dead. Din grabbed him by the neck and shook him to pull him out of unconsciousness. The merc opened his eyes and groaned. “Fuck.”

“You better have more to say than that.” Din growled, “Who sent you?”

“...followed the ship…”

Din swore. The ship Cara had rented. They’d figured out it was from Dantooine and from there it must not have been too difficult to trace a Mandalorian to Zake. He should never have brought her into this. “Who sent you?”

“You fuckers stole our meal ticket… Imps were gonna…”

“Imps?” The mirror shard had shifted and the merc died with a bloody gurgle. Din tossed him to the floor in disgust. Just the two, would they have sent more?

Did they have more to send? The rescue mission had killed a lot of them. Din looked around, then his visor picked up a small crack in the wall. Turning the sound sensors up as high as they could go, he could hear the soft sounds of breathing, sharp and tight. He closed his eyes in relief, then did another sweep of the living quarters. Nothing.

He went back to the wall with the crack and tapped on it. “Iruz’zake? Zake, it’s me.”

There was a hitch in the breathing sounds, then sounds of movement. Din backed away and the wall swung open to reveal a tiny room. Zake stood there, barefoot, in her dance clothes, without her headscarf.

She looked _breathtaking._

“You came,” she whispered, blinking like she couldn’t quite believe it.

“You called.” It was the dumbest thing he could have said but she leapt forward and flung her arms around his neck, letting out a groan of relief. Jha’iil cooed, reaching out to give her a pat, then tensed and gave Din an alarmed trill.

Din immediately pulled away from Zake and looked at her face. “We have to go. Now.” She nodded as he pulled her up the stairs. At the top he glanced to the rear door and growled. There was some movement at the back door. He pulled out a blaster and held it out to Zake. She looked down at it, shook her head, then slapped a panel by the door to the lower level. Inside was a credit pouch and a blaster.

He nodded in approval and turned his focus to the front door. “Can you run?”

She nodded and as soon as he made the move for the front door, she was right behind him. _Fuck subtlety_ , he thought and once they reached the main plaza, he headed directly into the largest crowds he could see. The crowds, almost without pause, opened around them and closed as they went past, making it difficult for any pursuit to follow with ease.

He had to assume they knew which ship was his, so they needed to get to the Crest as soon as possible. “Direct route it is.” Zake nodded grimly, glancing behind her at the shifting crowds. They ducked toward a temple of some kind with a teeming crowd surging into it, buffered on all sides by peddlers, beggars, and performers. Din elbowed his way into the front of the crowd waiting to enter and they darted in.

Inside, the crowds continued to ebb and flow, searching for places to make a donation, or a supplication, or just a quiet spot to rest. Din looked around and Zake grabbed his arm, taking the lead. “This way!”

Down the center aisle and behind the giant altar, covered in naked babies and shiny metals. Din paused for just half a heartbeat. “That’s…”

“Appalling. I know.” Zake yanked on his arm again, ducking behind the altar. There was a stair leading down and she led him down in, into a crypt. He slowed and with a sigh of disgust, she yanked him behind a tomb. “Shhhh.”

They waited for a few minutes, but no pursuit appeared. Zake nodded at a door in the back. “That goes to a tunnel that leads towards the spaceport.”

“How do you know?”

“We’ve had to make use of it once or twice.” She opened the door and they ran through.

“Is someone going to remember a barefoot twi’lek running through the temple?”

“It’s not the weirdest thing that’s been in there.” Having a goal to focus on helped Zake set aside the fear. Get to his ship. Get away. Fall apart later. There was always time to fall apart _later._ They ran, Zake leading them through some sharp twists and turns until they arrived at the spaceport.

Din was impressed. He shouldn’t have been surprised, not really, but she kept her head admirably. He took the lead in the last stretch to the Razor Crest, one hand on Zake’s upper arm -making it look like he was bringing in a bounty- but keeping his grip gentle. His other hand rested on Jha’iil’s head through the flap of the bag. Jha’iil was quiet, wiggling a little.

They got to the Razor Crest with a minimum of notice. Din gestured for Zake to find a seat in the hold while he went up to the cockpit to take off, taking Jha’iil with him. “Jate, ad’ika. Good job.”

“‘ce cream?”

“We need to get off this planet, but yes, we’ll find you some ice cream.” Din buckled Jha’iil into his seat and began the startup sequence, thankful for the routine. As it was, it had been a simple, straightforward extraction. The kid had behaved well and learning to pick up on his distress cues had really worked out well for all of them.

So why were his hands shaking?

He punched in the coordinates to Lah’mu. They were short on fuel and, he grimaced, other things like food. Water. Zake didn’t have _shoes_ , for fuck’s sake. He glanced at Jha’iil, who was happily playing with the toy Crest controls Cara had given him. “You good up here? I want to check on her.” Jha’iil nodded, pressing buttons to his heart’s content. Din stroked his ear and climbed down.

Zake was sitting, pressed into a corner, arms curled around her knees, shaking. She looked up at him, eyes big and dark. “I can’t believe this thing still flies.”

“I… take good care of it.”

“That’s not true. This thing is a mess.” She swallowed, “I mean…” the shaking got worse and Din swore fluently as he moved quickly to the sleeping compartment and popped open the door. He should have gotten her a blanket right away; he knew how shock worked, he’d seen it a hundred times and experienced it a hundred more. He’d just wanted to get up and away as soon as possible that he didn’t think.

“I’m sorry, ca’tra, I’m so sorry.” He pulled the blanket he still kept there- he had better ones in his rooms on Samaki, but this one was clean at least, if a little scratchy and threadbare. If absolutely nothing else, going to get Teryn all those months ago and having her looking around at his life with a raised eyebrow had made him get a few small comforts. He wrapped the blanket around Zake’s shoulders and she clutched it.

“I’m sorry, I’ve been through worse it’s just…” She shuddered. “It had been so long.”

Din was about to say something, when he noticed a dark discoloration on one of her deep blue lekku, and that one of them was swollen. “Did they hurt you?”

“...one of them grabbed it and pulled before I could stab him.” She held up her hand to wave him off. “It’s nothing.”

It was not nothing. Pulling a lekku could result in severe damage and was bound to be extremely painful. “Let me find a medkit.” He went to the locker and swore again. They’d used the last of the Crest’s supplies on the kids and he hadn’t had a chance to resupply. Yet another thing to add to the list. With a sigh, he wet a towel in cold water and brought it over to her.

“We’ll be to Leh’mu in about six hours. Can you make it until then?” He handed her the towel so she could wrap it around the bruised lek. She nodded.

“I’m out of… pretty much everything. I didn’t take the time to make sure I was stocked before we left.” She looked at him wonderingly and he shrugged defensively. “I left in a hurry.”

“Why?”

“....you needed help.”

He scrounged around and was able to come up with some tea of some kind. It wasn’t behot, but it smelled nice and he vaguely remembered Teryn saying something about it being calming. Zake took it gratefully. “It was just… it was a surprise. I didn’t expect anyone to come after me like that, not after all these years.” She hadn’t been sure of how many there were when she crept up the stairs to see them trashing her front room and before she could get to the blaster hidden near the stairs, they’d seen her. She’d almost made it to her panic room when they caught up, grabbing her lek roughly and pulling.

But she wasn’t defenseless. She was able to throw one into the mirrors, shattering them. Then she picked up a shard of glass and stabbed one in the neck and got her hands on his blaster. She shot the other, ran into the room, sealed it, and sent Din the message. She had no idea if there were others waiting, or if Din got the message, or if he would even come.

It seemed he’d come as fast as he possibly could.

“I think they traced the ship we’d rented back to Dantooine. They must have heard about you and a Mandalorian…” Din trailed off.

“Well, the implication of a relationship between us has proved useful more than once.” Zake laughed lightly as Din looked at her in surprise. “No one will mess with a woman who has a Mandalorian for a protector.”

“You never mentioned there was trouble.”

“There’s always trouble, boc.” She blinked, looking at the tea. “The operation was successful?”

“Yes. We were able to get almost all of the kids… one of them was killed.”

“I’m sorry.”

“We had some injuries… the other Mandalorian that was with us…”

“Your… vod’ika, is that the right word? Your sister’s…” Zake paused as she fished around for the right term. “....partner?”

“Yes. He’s going to be fine, but it was close.” Din smiled a bit. “They’re going to be married, there’s supposed to be a wedding soon, but I think they’ve already said the vows.” Teryn had never been great at keeping secrets. There was something about her smile when she came to present Lypatri that made him think they’d said them. He couldn’t blame either of them, not at all.

“Is that all it takes?”

“We like to keep things simple. People don’t even need to be in the same place to say the words.”

“Have you ever said them?”

Din stared at her, then away. “No. There was never anyone…. No.”

“Hm.” Zake mercifully changed the subject. “She said to call her Senaar. I would be right in thinking that isn’t her name?”

“No.” Din huffed a small laugh. “It means bird.”

“She doesn’t seem very bird-like.”

“She sings. Our buir- our mother- she called her jai’galaar’ika, her little shriekhawk. She was always very loud.” Din’s voice grew soft and fond. “And fierce.”

“That seems accurate. What did your mother call you?”

Din looked down “She called me ‘ner kot.’”

“What does that mean?”

“‘My strength’.”

“Seems like a lot of pressure to put on a small child.” Zake smiled, leaning against the hull, eyes beginning to droop. “And you’ve been strong ever since.”

This subject needed to be changed. Immediately. “Would you like the bed?” Din gestured to the cot.

Zake eyed it dubiously. “That’s a bed?”

Ademe and Ordo went to the small room they were keeping the captured merc in. Thus far, he’d been resistant to questioning. He had a cot, a bucket, was brought something to eat that met all nutritional needs twice a day. He still had a restraint collar on and, for a merc, was proving remarkably closed-mouthed about his employers.

“You’re going to kill me anyway, what does it matter if I tell you anything?” He spat on Ademe’s boots. “Fuck you.”

Ademe snorted and hit the shock control.

When she came back with Ordo, they weren’t alone. They’d brought Edeemir.

The ginger haired merc backed into the wall. “Get that hellbeast away from me.”

Edeemir growled, low, resonant in his barrel chest. Ademe smiled behind her helmet and stroked Edeemir’s head. “This hellbeast was with the Mando’ade children you stole.” She laughed as the panic in the merc’s face rose. “The children tell me his name is Edeemir. Which means ‘bite.’ Why do you think he has that name?”

Edeemir barked, showing off his many excellent teeth. There was a sudden acrid smell of piss, and Ordo smirked. “I think he remembers you. If not you personally, he sure knows where you came from.”

“So,” Ademe said, stroking Edeemir’s head. “If you don’t want to make a closer acquaintance of Bite’s teeth here, tell us. Who hired you?”

“Gideon! It was Moff Gideon!”

“Why?”

“I don’t know what he’s using them for!” At Ademe’s dubious head tilt, the merc shook his head again. “I don’t! He wanted as many as possible! That’s all I know! I swear!”

“And the woman? The slave you had to take care of the merchandise?”

“I don’t know where he got her, but she was given to us six months ago!”

Ademe and Ordo exchanged a look and nodded at each other. “Thank you. You’ve been very helpful.” Ademe took her hand off Edeemir’s head. “Edeemir, jurkadir.”

Edeemir lunged and the ginger haired merc screamed. But not for long.

Teryn took Lypatri to see Vha after lunch. Cuan was being visited by Tuathal and both of them had been told to keep the visit short, but Teryn was under no illusions about that.

“She wants to see me?” Lypatri had asked.

“She would like to. Do you want to?” Teryn smiled as Lypatri nodded. “Then let's go.” Lypatri trotted at Teryn’s side until they got closer to the medbay. Lypatri slowed down. “What’s wrong, ner kar’ta?”

Lypatri shrugged, but looked uncertain. “I don’t like this place.”

“It’s been stressful every time you’ve been here. Later, we can go do a tour when I’m just working, okay?” Lypatri nodded and they went to Vha’s room.

Vha was sitting on the bed, staring off into space, but managed to come up with a smile for Lypatri. “You’re a lot cleaner than the last time I saw you.”

Lypatri nodded, then glanced at Teryn. “Vor entye, right?” Teryn nodded. “Vor entye.”

“Did they tell you what that means?” Vha asked.

Lypatri frowned. “Thank you?”

“That’s what it’s used for, but what it translates to is ‘I accept a debt.’” Teryn said.

“Oh. So,” Lypatri frowned, working it out. “I’m in debt to her for saving my life?”

Teryn nodded, giving Vha a smile. Vha looked down at Lypatri. “I’m in your debt, too. If you hadn’t found the Mandalorian, I’d still be there. All of the kids would be.”

“Oh.”

Teryn put her hands on Lypatri’s shoulders. “We are all in debt to both of you.” She smiled at the both. “We wouldn’t have been able to rescue anyone without both of you being so brave.”

“I was really scared, Bu. I wasn’t brave.”

“My Buir told me that doing something even though you’re scared is what makes you brave.” Teryn tucked one of Lypatri’s curls behind her ear.

“My buir said that, too.” Vha murmured.

Teryn gave her a sympathetic smile. But she thought to herself that Paz Vizsla could take a page from his own fucking book.

The Armorer took a deep breath before going into the medbay. She had been unsure, at first, of combining the medical teams. Yes, from most practical standpoints it made sense. The Nevarro tribe didn’t have much (and, she admitted, a lot of what they had was because Teryn had brought it with her). They only had a half-trained apprentice, since they were, officially, losing Teryn to the other Tribe. And while Tabor was inhaling information as fast as he could, he was still not yet capable of handling the medical needs of a Tribe by himself. Combining their resources only made sense.

But it still worried her that the Samaki medical people would make a mistake, or not know how to handle her people’s needs. She’d overheard the children discussing the need to not invade their space without invitation, she could only hope that the adults could show the same respect.

At least with Teryn staying in the Covert, that meant that someone would know what to do and what not to do. That was something, she supposed. She still found it mildly surprising that Teryn was intending to stay, but she’d seen how Cuan Tadasco looked at her and how she’d gotten more and more comfortable since they arrived in this place.

And now there was Vha to deal with.

The Armorer had told Paz the truth, but not all of it. Yes, she’d found Vayez and was able to salvage his armor. Yes, she’d of course noticed that neither Vha’s body nor armor was anywhere to be found. Vayez had been near the lava river with the remains of several stormtroopers and there had been signs of something falling into the river. It was not an entirely unreasonable assumption that Vha’s body had gone into the river.

But there had been a small voice in her head that said, “...what if she hadn’t?” There’d been so much to do and so much horror and grief that the Armorer had closed a lid over the voice and tried to ignore it.

That had been a mistake. And yet, here Vha was, back, and safe. Not quite sound.

Dishonored.

They still needed to know what happened. But more importantly, The Armorer needed to talk to Vha. She needed to…. Something.

Cara, to her credit, hadn’t asked anything, or said anything. The Armorer knew very well that Cara had some opinions regarding their treatment of Teryn, but Cara also understood that there were cultural tides that she didn’t really understand. Their brief time together was not spent on anthropology.

Inside the medbay, the Armorer did not hesitate in going to Vha’s room and knocking on the door. It had already been a full day and two nights since they had discovered that Vha was alive. She waited, outwardly calm but inwardly anxious, until Vha softly said, “Come in.”

She was not in the bed, but sitting in a chair near the window, looking out. There was a view of the children playing and Vha was gripping the window sill with her finger tips. Faris was at training; The Armorer had planned this deliberately, waiting to get Vha alone.

“Su cuy'gar.” The meaning of the traditional greeting was not lost on either of them. _You’re still alive._

Vha turned and while her face kept still, the emotion in her eyes was intense. “That’s what they tell me.” She turned back to the window.

The Armorer sighed and shut the door. “I should have come to see you before this.” Vha didn’t respond. “I am relieved to see that you are. We had been certain that you were killed.”

“Would have been better if I had.”

“No.”

“What was it you always said? _This is the Way._ ‘Have you ever removed your helmet? Has your helmet ever been removed by another?’ The last time I heard you say that was right before the beroya….” Vha turned to look at the Armorer. “You heard what my-” She swallowed. “What the al’verde said about the al’baar’ur. That she was a faithless coward. How am I different?”

The Armor did not reply. Vha twisted her mouth. “I am not. I wasn’t strong enough to fight them, I wasn’t able to prevent them from… I wasn’t able to defend myself or the Tribe. I broke the Creed. And the al’verde, my…. He won’t even...”

“No,” the Armorer said softly. “You remained alive. Because of you and your ori’vod, we were able to save the Foundlings. The Tribe survived and no one ever forgot you.”

“They will now. Better a warrior’s death than… this.” Vha turned back to the window, fingers tightening even further on the sill.

“There was a time I might have thought so. Now… I’m not so sure.” The Armorer remained near the door. “There’s been a great deal to think about since we had to leave Nevarro. We lost so many. We had gotten complacent, staying there for over ten years. Some of the things we did to survive before are perhaps not healthy now.” She sighed. “I’m not entirely sure they were useful then, but it’s what we were taught.”

Vha glanced at her, then away.

“I am happy to see that you are alive. I am relieved that you are back with us. I am… I am sorry that we failed you. I should have… I should have made an effort to confirm.” Vha had always been a survivor. All Foundlings were, to one degree or another, but this was the child who had snuck out, broken her arm, and tried to pass it off as a training accident the next day. She was smart, she was scrappy, and she was determined.

These attributes could only help her in the future, whatever that might turn out to be.

“He said he was going to use me.” Vha whispered. “He said he would use me as bait to draw the beroya out of hiding when the time was right. I don’t know when that would be.”

“Who said that?”

“Gideon.”

Jha’iil climbed down the ladder to Din, looking for some snuggles. He gave Zake, curled up in the cot, a smile, then turned to Din, one ear raised in a question.

“No. Not so soon.” Din ran a finger down Jha’iil’s nose. “Jate. Thank you for asking.”

“Laar?”

Shit. “No, we left the datapad at home.” Zake looked up from the cot, her uninjured lek curling in a question. “My vod’ika, she sings. She made him a datapad with songs on it.” She nodded sleepily and her head went down again.

“Buir, laar! Laarir” Jha’iil frowned. “You! Ke laarir!”

Din glanced at Zake and then back down at Jha’iil. “I don’t….”

“Gedet? Please?”

Din sighed. He had been singing along with some of the songs. He and Teryn hadn’t sung together since before the Purge, but singing along to the recordings was enjoyable, and Jha’iil enjoyed it. But singing by himself? With an audience? He glanced at Zake, but she appeared to have fallen asleep and Jha’iil was looking up with pleading eyes.

Din sighed.

“Come little children  
I'll take thee away  
Into a land of enchantment

Come little children  
The time's come to play  
Here in my garden of shadows.”

Zake allowed herself to drift off to the song. He had a soothing voice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The experience off getting into the temple is based on visiting St Stephens Cathedral in Vienna- utter chaos. It was great. Also I have opinions on baroque design aesthetic. 
> 
> Mando'a translations
> 
> K’uur, ad’ika: hush, little one.  
> Birikad: baby carrying harness  
> ba’vodu: parent's sibling  
> ca’tra: night sky  
> behot  
> vod'ika: Younger sibling  
> Mando’ade: Mandalorians, Children of Mandalore  
> jurkadir: Attack  
> ner kar’ta: My heart, my love  
> buir: Parent  
> beroya: Bounty hunter  
> al'verde: Commander  
> al'baar'ur: Doctor  
> ori'vod: Older sibling  
> Jate: Good  
> laar: Song  
> laarir: Sing (ke laarir: imerative form) 
> 
> Rhyl translation
> 
> boc: Stalagmite, rock formation


	41. The ocean opens its arms to lost souls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> PINING PINING SO MUCH PINING 
> 
> Some other stuff. BUT THE PINING.

Din was incredibly reluctant to wake Zake when they got to Lah’mu but she needed clothes and some hot food and fresh air would probably be good for her. She looked so peaceful while sleeping; she’d been so tired. He gently gave her foot a shake then backed up quickly as she startled awake.

She blinked at him, confused, then looked around, reorienting herself. “Are we… where are we?”

“Lah’mu. We’re fueling up and there’s a market, so….” He paused, looking at her. She only had her dance clothes on. “...I might have an extra kute around, let me see.”

“A what?”

“What I wear under my armor. It’ll be big but... it’ll be warmer.” He rummaged around in his lockers and to his profound relief found a set that was clear and not too patched. At least it _was_ patched. There was another set back in his quarters on Samaki that he’d been meaning to repair for weeks.

She took the kute and nodded, then ran a hand over the scarring on one lek. “I don’t suppose you have anything…” _That could cover these up._

Din shook his head slowly. “No, we… we can find something.” While Zake changed in the refresher, he tucked Jha’iil back in the carrying bag and set the bag down on the table. Jha’iil waited patiently. This is where he would finally get his much deserved ice cream and he had no intention of messing that up now.

Besides, if he wasn’t good, then his buir would leave him behind more. And he did not want that.

Din poked into a storage locker. He thought he remembered chucking an old pair of boots in there. They weren’t great but they would be better than nothing. He huffed in triumph as he found them and turned around to show them off as Zake exited the refresher. The kute was big on her; she’d had to roll the cuffs on both the pants and sleeves. He nodded, realizing that he had a strange, doofy smile on his face. _Thank the stars for the helmet._

“I found boots…” he held them out awkwardly and she smiled gratefully. They were, of course, too big, but not as much as he would have thought. She had dancer feet, he realized. Long, the kind that made leaps easier. He wasn’t entirely sure where he’d picked up that information.

“Shall we go?”

She looked dubiously at Jha’iil and the bag. “You… carry him that?”

“No!” Din said defensively. “Not normally. I just… didn’t grab the carrier. We had to improvise.”

She nodded dubiously. “Okay. Let’s go.”

The market wasn’t huge but it was adequate. Din was able to get food directly from the farmers, which was a small thing to be happy about; it was fresher, it was cheaper, and everyone was just a lot more relaxed. He was even able to get a small, very basic medkit, but no bacta.

Zake was able to find a few clothes, but no shoes.

“Nah, the shoemaker’s away at his kid’s wedding. He’ll be back in a couple of months.”

“What do you do for shoes in the meantime?” Zake asked. She’d never lived in a small community like this.

The clothes merchant shrugged. “We all knew he was going, so we got new shoes before he left.” She looked at the scars on Zake’s lekku with sympathetic interest.

Zake internally squirmed at being so exposed when she hadn’t been for _years_. She nodded slowly and picked out some thick socks that at least would make Din’s old boots fit better. She looked at the pouch of credits before handing some of them over. She’d have to start her life over, again, and this was all she had. Sure, there might be a way to access her account in the banking system but they'd need to plan that carefully so they could vanish before anyone could track them that way.

She frowned. She. She would need a way. Where was this _they_ coming from?

Din sighed. There was no ice cream to be found, but there were sweet buns. “This is what they’ve got, ad’ika. I’m sure the skraan’ur will make some ice cream when we get back.” He bought three of them.

Jha’iil sighed. He knew very well that the lack of ice cream wasn’t his buir’s fault and he knew that there would be ice cream eventually. His buir never forgot a promise, never. But he had been _so good._ He nibbled on his sweet bun. It was good, it was fine. It just… it wasn’t ice cream.

Din patted Jha’iil on the head. “Jate, ad’ika. N'eparavu takisit. We’ll find some.” He glanced at another stall with woven cloth. He casually wandered over, trying not to look too interested, but there was one that was a deep, deep blue, deeper than the blue of Zake’s skin, with small yellow flecks woven into it. He looked down at Jha’iil. “You think she’ll like that?”

Jha’iil peeped out, shrugged, and went back to eating his sweet bun.

Din fingered it. It was hard to tell through his gloves but it felt light and soft, and it had a nice drape to it. The woman running the stall came over and nodded. “Wove that myself. Nice, isn’t it?”

“It is.” Din fingered it some more, thinking. Was it too much? Was it too…. Intimate? Should he just tell her about it?

“It would look nice on your lady friend.”

Din wasn’t able to hide his jerk of surprise, not entirely. “No, she’s not… I mean…” He took a breath to regroup. “How much?”

The weaver tilted her head. “For her? A gift.”

Din couldn’t think of anything to say but, “...why?”

“You show up with a woman dressed like that, looking like she’s expecting trouble from around every corner, she’s had some rough times. Sometimes a little bit of beauty can make all the difference. Please. Take it.”

Once they returned to the Razor Crest, Din discovered that Jha’iil had eaten two of the sweet buns and was not at all sorry about it. The reproachful look in his eyes was a clear enough message and Din knew very well that the remaining sweet bun was for Zake, not for him. He handed the bun to Zake silently and went up to the cockpit, the night sky fabric weighing heavily on his mind.

It was too much. He shouldn’t have accepted it. He shouldn’t give it to her. She’d think… well, she’d think _things_. He didn’t want to think things that would absolutely, 100% make her uncomfortable. There was no reason for her to think things. That hug back on Dantooine was just the relief at assistance finally arriving. It didn’t mean… things.

Zake frowned as he climbed up to the cockpit to get the ship into the air. He’d been silent after finishing up getting supplies, except for a very few terse words. Had she done something wrong? She shouldn’t have hugged him. That was far too invasive. It was _impolite_. She looked down at Jha’iil.

“Let's get you out of that bag, pol.” She paused at the name that just slipped out, but smiled at him. “How are you, little one? Is he keeping your claws well in hand?”

“Naas.”

“Naas? I don’t know what that means, but I will assume that means you’re well. You look well.” She looked at the claws on each hand, nodding approvingly. “They look good.”

“Color?” Jha’iil wiggled his fingers.

She let out a small laugh. “You do remember! I don’t know if the paints I sent home with him are on the ship or not.” She pulled him out of the bag and set him on the floor. He toddled around, looking for something. She watched him, then slipped into the refresher to change into the clothes she bought.

They were certainly more comfortable than Din’s undergear, but… she folded it up and left it on the end of the cot. Doubling up the socks did make the boots fit better and her feet were finally approaching something like warm. There were some scratches and bruises that would need to be addressed but considering she’d run halfway across the city in bare feet, they were in good shape.

Out in the hold, Jha’iil was still wandering about, then came toward her holding something wrapped in paper and held it out to her. She took it, frowning. “Do you need help unwrapping this?”

She unwrapped the paper to find a length of fabric, soft, silky, and beautiful. For any other child it might be small for a blanket, but the small green baby was quite small. She held it out to him. “Here you go.”

Jha’iil chirped “Vor’e!” and took the paper the cloth had been wrapped in. He toddled off to a corner with some unidentifiable black grease on the wall and started to use the black stuff to draw on the paper with his fingers. Zake blinked, then looked down at the fabric. It was the right size for covering her lekku, but what was it really for?

Teryn walked out of the room where they’d put the baby that Solde had brought just in time to see the Armorer walking out of Vha’s room. She felt her face go frozen as she stalked forward. She’d told Vha that she would be there with her when being questioned. How dare she get Vha alone like this? Technically, she wasn’t Vha’s alor. She did not have this authority.

Nevermind that Teryn had basically dared her to go talk to Vha, to show some compassion and leadership. Was that what she had done? Or had she just traumatized Vha more?

If Teryn wanted to be fair, which she did not, she would admit that the Armorer had been more or less compassionate when it came to her own return… but those circumstances had been… Teryn shook her head. Not less fraught. Just differently fraught.

The Armorer vanished out the door, heading with purpose to the Samaki Forge. Teryn frowned after her then ran to Vha’s room. Vha was sitting in the corner, arms wrapped around her knees, trembling a little.

“What happened?”

“I told her… I told her that Gideon….”

Teryn’s face went white. “Gideon?” She grabbed the blanket off the bed and slowly approached Vha. “What did he do?”

“He…” Vha started to shudder. Teryn wrapped the blanket around her. “He said he would….” She leaned over and buried her face into Teryn’s shoulder. Teryn wrapped an arm around Vha, frowning.

“What did Alor say to you?”

“It doesn’t matter,” Vha mumbled. “None of it matters.”

Teryn sighed. She wasn’t even sure what to say at this point, what could make things better for Vha. The door opened and Rima entered, without her helmet, followed by the Armorer. Vha jumped at the sudden sound and Teryn tensed, ready to jump up.

“Ah, al’baar’ur, you’re here. Good.” Rima nodded at Teryn. Teryn nodded warily back, then glared at the Armorer. “Your Alor said that your…” Rima paused, searching for the right word. “...that she was held captive by Gideon.”

Teryn looked at Vha. “Do you want to get up off the floor?” She squeezed Vha’s arm to encourage it. If this interview was going to happen, and it seemed like it was, then Vha needed to be in a less fearful position. Vha nodded and Teryn helped her stand up. She was still painfully weak, though her physical wounds were healing well.

The scars on her neck, though, were likely to remain. Teryn frowned, thinking of the cream Zake had given her for her back scars. She hadn’t used it yet and it was far too soon to be useful for Vha, but it was something to keep in mind.

“Now… what’s your-” Rima paused as Teryn shot her a furious glare. “What should I call you?” Vha stared up at Rima, but didn’t answer. Neither Teryn nor the Armorer volunteered any information and Rima sighed. “My name is Rima, I’m the other alor here. I’m sorry I haven’t come to see you before but the al’baar’ur felt you needed more rest first.”

Vha gave a tiny nod.

“But your alor-”

“She’s not my alor anymore. I don’t have one.”

Rima narrowed her eyes slightly. “-she came to me and said that you had been held captive by Gideon and I have some questions. Can you answer them now?” Not _will you_ , Teryn noted. _Can you._

Vha nodded again and sat down on the bed, holding the blanket around her like a shield, or Teryn remembered, like she herself had wrapped herself in the fur cloak. Anything to cover the hole where her soul had been from prying eyes. “I don’t know what I can tell you…”

“Can you tell us what happened?”

Vha looked at Teryn warily and took a deep breath when Teryn gave her a nod. “....there were so many of them, they overwhelmed us. My ori’vod... “ her voice broke and she took another deep breath before continuing in a flat tone. “My ori’vod was killed. I froze. I shouldn’t have and they got some shots in. The beskar deflected but I went down. I was ready for them to kill me but they got word that they should get one of us alive, so… they stunned me and…”

Teryn snaked a hand under the blanket to let Vha grip it, out of the view of either alor.

“The next thing I knew I was in front of Moff Gideon and he… he took…” Vha shuddered again. “He took my helmet and then he touched… he touched…”

Treyn closed her eyes, shuddering herself. “He touched your face.” Vha nodded. The Armorer hissed.

“They took my armor. I was held for… I don’t know how long. He told me they’d killed everyone and they would find the beroya, and he’d use me to do it.” Vha stared off into the middle distance. “They wanted to know where he might have gone… I didn’t know… he would ask where the covert might have gotten moved to if anyone was alive… maybe he’d go there… I didn't know anything… I didn’t know where they would go...”

That was deliberate. There was a plan in place should the Covert need to be evacuated, a short list of places to go to regroup. But only a handful of people ever knew where any of them were, for just this reason. Clearly Gideon knew that part of the Tribe had escaped his death squad and he was looking for them as well as Din and Jha’iil.

Unlike the torture that the stormtroopers had subjected Teryn to, Vha didn’t have many visible scars from Gideon’s interrogrations. Not visible ones, Teryn noted, but plenty of scars just the same.

“Do you know where your armor is now?” The Armorer asked. Teryn glared daggers. That was hardly the point.

Vha shook her head.

“Do you know where they took you? They didn’t stay on Nevarro…” Rima frowned, sorting through all the information they’d been able to gather.

“No. I never found out. They took me to Ord Mantell… that’s where it was, right?” Vha continued at Teryn’s nod. “...a while ago? I tried to escape but they were always able to find me… they put the collar on me after the second attempt.”

The Armorer frowned, cocking her head to the side. “Al’baar’ur… back on Jelucan, Moff Gideon had implied that he’d had a tracker implanted in your… in the man that was following you?”

Teryn’s face went white. “Fuck.”

“What?” Rima looked alarmed as Teryn dashed from the room. “That’s a thing?”

The Armorer nodded as Vha shrank back, looking around for escape. “I don’t know what the range is, but if they were able to find her after escaping… they might…”

Teryn ran back in, carrying a scanner and small surgery kit. “I didn’t think….I’m sorry.” Of course they should have thought of this. But she hadn’t asked Vha any questions and now because of that oversight, they might all be in danger.

“You’ve had a lot on your mind, al’baar’ur,” The Armorer said, not unkindly. “You can’t hold everything.”

Teryn shot her a look that said yes, she should be able to. She frowned at the scanner. “There is something…” Vha started to shake uncontrollably. “We’ll get it out, don’t worry.” It was easy really, a bit of numbing, a quick incision, a yank, a suture, and a bacta dressing. “Won’t even scar.”

Vha continued to shake. “I didn’t know, I swear I didn’t know. I would have said…. I didn’t know!” It wasn’t until Teryn reluctantly gave her a sedative that she stopped and slumped to the bed. Teryn tucked her in and turned to Rima and the Armorer.

“Now what?”

“If they can track us here…” Rima frowned as she took the chip. “I’ll take it to Kata, maybe she and Solde can find out how far the range is. We might be able to use this…”

The Armorer nodded. “Ask the beroya about the tracking fobs and how they work. That might be relevant.” Teryn nodded, internally wincing. She’d never told the Armorer that Din had left. Technically, Cara was also a beroya; she could ask her.

Rima tapped her fingers on her belt, thinking furiously. “We just sent our biggest ship with the children going back to Corellia… if we do need to evacuate, it’ll be tight. And I’d rather not.” Her voice grew wistful. “I like it here.”

Teryn left the medbay and found Cara, as was her habit at this point in the evening, kicking back with some netra gal. “I need to know how the tracking fobs work.” Teryn said without preamble.

Cara blinked, but there was something in the set of Teryn’s jaw and shoulders that said there was no time for questions. “They only work on the same planet as the target- when we get a bounty, one of the pieces of information is the last known location. The hunter needs to get within range for the fob to be useful.”

“So,” Teryn nodded, relaxing slightly, “It can’t just find someone halfway across the galaxy.”

“It can’t even find people from halfway across a continent, usually. Planetary curvature gets in the way. Mountains, hell, sometimes cities are too dense.” Cara snorted. “I have no idea if those fucking things would even work on Coruscant.”

Teryn wrinkled her nose at the thought of the former capital planet. But her shoulders relaxed some more. At least, until Paz exited the Nevarro building. She couldn’t quite control the sneer of disgust on her face before turning her attention back to Cara.

Cara glanced at Paz, back to Teryn and raised an eyebrow. “Why?”

“Would the same principles apply to a tracking chip implanted in someone?”

Cara shrugged. “I really don’t know how those would work but if it’s small, it can’t transmit far, can it?”

Paz wheeled around and stalked toward Teryn and Cara. “Who the fuck had a tracking chip? Didn’t you check them?”

Teryn’s mouth dropped open for just a second and then snapped shut. “I just cut it out of your daughter’s neck.” she snapped. Paz froze. Teryn narrowed her eyes and hissed, “It was put there by Gideon. He held her prisoner for the past year, which you would know if you went to talk to your daughter, you fucking coward.” She and Cara had been speaking Basic and Teryn hadn’t switched back to Mando’a. Until her nostrils flared and she hissed, “Hut’uun.”

Paz froze.

Teryn held his stare for a full minute, then looked at Cara. “Thank you for the information.” She turned on her heel and stalked away.

Paz flexed his hands before walking in another direction. Cara glanced between them both, took another swig of her beer, and went inside to check her weapons. If tracking chips were in play, that could mean anything.

Slowly, the tension around the Covert began to increase. Adults would meet, talk quickly, and part. The children were all told to keep close and not wander off. Teryn popped into her quarters to find Cuan slowly packing go-bags for all three of them.

“Just in case, LaarSenaar.” She nodded, thinking at hyperspeed. Roccan had gone with the group to Corellia, they could probably get the field kits they brought to Ord Mantell restocked and ready to go very quickly. Her thoughts drifted back to Vha and she shuddered a bit. Cuan immediately stopped what he was doing and came over, lightly stroking the back of her neck. “What is it?”

“She told us that when Gideon took her helmet he touched her face.” She sighed, shaking her head. “I knew it was useless but I’d hoped she’d been spared that.”

He hummed quietly, his other hand reaching up to touch some of the loose wisps of hair at her hairline. She flinched and he let out a soft sigh. Normally, that was a safe spot to touch. His hand went down to her braid, tracing the pattern.

“For us, because your face is reserved for your riduur and your children, touching a face is the most intimate thing you can do.” She brushed her knuckles over his cheek, then ran her thumb over his mouth.

He nodded. He’d pieced together as much. The violation of it was appalling. She leaned into his shoulder, drawing strength from him.

Teryn took a deep breath to recenter herself so she could get back to the never-ending list of things that needed doing and glanced around to see that Atin’s basket was packed as well. A blanket and a small bag were tucked into it. She nodded at the bag. “What’s this?”

“Travel water and food dishes for him. That way we don’t have to remember to grab the ones he’s using.” He grinned, eyes crinkling. “Teaching him how to use the refresher was a genius move.”

She grinned back. “It was honestly the easiest thing to do on the Razor Crest. The baby would have gotten into anything else.”

Din came down the ladder to find Jha’iil making a messy drawing on the floor, his hands and clothes covered in grease, and Zake sitting, dressed in her new clothes and his old boots, holding the fabric.

She looked up at him, uncertain. “He wanted this unwrapped, but just for the paper, I think….”

“We left his drawing stuff at home.” Din shifted uncomfortably. “I…. do you like it?”

“It’s beautiful.” She glanced away at anything except him. “What’s it for?”

“Well… you.”

Zake turned and looked at him, blinking. Her uninjured lek curled tightly, then relaxed. “...for me?”

“You didn’t have a scarf, and it was…. Pretty.” He mumbled the last word. She continued to blink at him and he squirmed. “It reminded me of the night sky and I thought… well, you needed one and I just….” he trailed off as she slowly shook it out, placed it over her head, and tied the ends beneath her lekku.

“Thank you. Thank you, boc.”

“What does that mean? Boc?”

“I… it means…” her cheeks flushed and her lek twitched. “It means ‘rock formation’.” His head tilted in a question. “When you showed up with your sister and her… her other Mandalorian, I realized I needed something to call you, at least in my head, and it just... came out.”

She ducked her head so he couldn’t see her face. She was tired, so tired, and so worn out by everything, she couldn’t control anything anymore. He stepped forward slowly.

Jha’iil looked up, then returned back to his drawing.

“In my Tribe it’s considered rude to use someone’s name except in the strongest possible way… so some people are referred to by nicknames.”

“Like Kot.”

“Yes.” He smiled. “I’m honored to have one from you.” He reached out and put one finger under her chin and urged her to look at him. She slowly raised her eyes and he lightly stroked the point of her chin with his gloved thumb. “Thank you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mando'a translations
> 
> kute: underwear, bodysuit, something worn under armor  
> ad’ika: Little one, kid  
> Skraan'ur: Cook  
> Jate: Good.  
> Buir: Parent  
> N'eparavu takisit:  
> Naas: The response for "I'm fine thanks," is *Naas.* (Literally - nothing. )  
> Vor'e: Thanks!  
> Alor: Chief  
> Al'baar'ur: Doctor  
> Beroya: Bounty hunter  
> netra gal: black ale - sweet, almost spicy black beer similar to milk stout  
> Hut’uun: Coward, worst possible insult.  
> LaarSenaar: Songbird  
> riduur: Spouse  
> Kot: Strenght, Jha's childhood nickname for Din
> 
> Rhyl translations:
> 
> Pol: Stalactite  
> Boc: Rock formation, stalagmite


	42. And this house just ain't no home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Parents and children and relationships and some questions and some answers.
> 
> CW for mention of a deceased child in the very first section.

Edeemir was having a rough night. Most of the children from Taris were sleeping in the dorms, with the exception of the baby, who still needed medical care, and his older brother, who elected to remain with him. Lathom and her baby Senaaru kept an eye on them, as well. Caring for children was something everyone participated in.

Edeemir had gone to check on them, standing up so he could peek through the window. Lathom had been startled the first time, but soon grew accustomed to the sound of scrabbling claws on the window and a quiet woof.

“All is well.”

Back at the dorm, though, he couldn’t settle. He’d sniff each child, then go to the door and look toward the med bay, and then walk around anxiously, sniffing and whining quietly. Saojeme often took the night shift with the new kids and watched as he repeated the cycle several times. Finally, he came up to her and whined.

And then it hit her. There were supposed to be thirteen children but one of them wasn’t there. He whined again and she scratched him behind his ears. “I’m sorry, kotep, but he’s marching away already.”

How much could a strill understand? She sighed and glanced over at the children. They all appeared to be asleep. “Come with me, kotep. I know where your missing charge is.”

At the back of the medbay was a small room they used as a morgue when the circumstances called for it. The body of the child, along with those of the warriors Solde had found, had been placed there until they were able to honor them properly. Rima and the Armorer had both agreed to give it a couple days after Solde’s return, in case they received word from their tribe and family.

Officially, the rule was no animals in the med bay, but technically this wasn’t the medbay and there wasn’t anything he could do in this room. She led him in and over to the slab. The room was cold but there was a light burning in the corner- the boy wasn’t being left alone in the dark. Edeemir whined, low, and stiffly walked over to the body, sniffing it all over before licking his face.

He sat and lifted his nose to the ceiling and let out the most unearthly howl Saojeme had ever heard. Then, with one last sniff of the child, he headed straight back for the dorm and his remaining charges.

Kata frowned down at the tracking chip, careful not to touch it. “It is transmitting but…” she shook her head. “I don’t think it’s going that far.” She looked up at both Rima and the Armorer. It was odd. This was the first time the Nevarro alor had ventured into her workspace, but clearly the situation was serious enough for both of them to be there.

“Can you block it?” Rima asked. Kata shrugged. Maybe she could, but…. Rima sighed and nodded. “Then we should get it off this world as fast as possible.”

The Armorer nodded. “Agreed. Maybe the beroya-”

“But he’s not here.” Kata said, frowning. “He left yesterday.” She had her helmet on so she could use all of her tools to analyse the chip and she was grateful for it. She hadn’t had much contact with the Nevarro alor, or many of the Nevarro people save when she took her turn at sentry duty (and the warrior that had worked with her on the communicator for the al’baar’ur). Being able to hide a bit of herself from them just felt safer.

The Armorer tilted her head at Kata, almost threatening. “What do you mean he left?”

“He…. I thought you knew?” Kata glanced at Rima, hoping she wasn’t getting anyone into trouble.

“I did not.” The Armorer took a breath. “If the beroya has left, perhaps then my other ship…” she inclined her head to Kata, “...and as you know how this item works, perhaps you should go, as well?”

Kata nodded slowly. Rima raised an eyebrow. “How’s your foot?”

“It’s healing. Where should we take it?”

The Armorer smiled to herself. “My pilot might have a few ideas. I’ll tell him to be ready to leave within an hour.”

Rima glanced at Kata. “Can you be ready to go in that time?”

Kata nodded and hobbled to her quarters to pack. Yes, her foot was better, but it was nowhere near healed. She’d need to get some things from the medbay to make it through.

Paz turned to the medbay. The fact was Teryn was right. He was being a coward. He was ashamed of himself. He was ashamed that he had turned his back on his child, the one closest to his heart. Of course one isn’t supposed to have favorites, and he adored all three of them, but Vha had been…

His buir had told him that it was because while Vayez was just like Paz, Vha had been the type to complement their personalities. She pushed where Vayez had pulled. As a team, they’d been unstoppable.

In the medbay, Paz found her room. She was curled up on the bed, asleep, in the dark. He held his breath and walked forward to kneel at the side of the bed.

She’d lost the roundness of a young teenager, her cheeks now sharp and hollow. How much of that was due to starvation was hard to tell. Since she swore the Creed and disappeared into her armor and helmet, she’d shot up another four inches, much to the amused dismay of the Armorer.

He hadn’t seen her face in five years,. Technically, it was allowable for parents and adult children to still see each other without their helmets. He knew that some in the Covert had become a bit more relaxed around their immediate families, but that was not how he grew up and that was not how he’d raised his children.

No, this interpretation of Way was started by Vizsla family and he would remain in it. To do otherwise would be an insult to those who’d come before. It would render the costs it had demanded of him, of his family, of his clan, of his people, as pointless.

But it was hard. It was so hard.

He softly smoothed back a stray piece of hair, like he’d done countless times when she was little, and like she always had, she stirred briefly, opened her eyes, and smiled. “Buir,” she whispered. He let out a soft noise and she closed her eyes again, settling back into sleep.

Paz let his head drop. How could this have happened?

Teryn and Cuan finished with the go-bags when Lypatri dashed in. “Bu? Buir? Upio asked if I wanted to have dinner with her, can I? I mean, am I allowed? I said yes but her buir said I had to ask you if it was okay so I am. Asking. Can I? Is it okay?” She squinted down at the bags. “Are we going somewhere?”

“Kurs’ika, we might have to leave here very quickly.” Cuan said. “I’d rather you stayed close to home tonight until we know what’s happening.”

Lypatri’s eyes got big and scared. “Why?”

Cuan and Teryn exchanged a glance. “It’s possible some bad people might be able to find us. So we have plans in place if we need to leave quickly.” Cuan ruffled her hair affectionately.

“Have you ever had to before?”

Teryn looked at Cuan with interest. She didn’t know the answer to this question. “There were a few times in the first few years we were here that we went into hiding because there were Imperial scout ships nearby. There are tunnels that lead out of the valley.”

Lypatri nodded slowly, nervously. “Are they… the bad people who tried to steal me?”

Teryn and Cuan exchanged another glance and Teryn knelt down. “Not exactly. There are… bad people who don’t like us because we’re Mandalorians. They tried to…” She paused and cocked her head, considering. Lypatri had seen a lot in her life. Perhaps it was best to be mostly honest. “A long time ago, they tried to kill all of us.” Cuan let his fingers touch the back of Teryn’s neck. It wasn’t that long ago. For all surviving adults, the Purge was a fresh wound that would never heal.

“Oh.” Lypatri considered this. “But… the teacher, the al’verde bajur? He said that Mandalorians were the greatest warriors in the galaxy.”

Cuan smiled, a bit sadly. “We are, but sometimes there are just too many enemies, Kurs’ika.” He took a deep breath. “So, we should check to make sure you’re all packed if we need to leave in a hurry.”

“Don’t have much.”

“You have a little bit more than you think.” Cuan nodded at the carton near the door to her room. “Take a look in there.” Lypatri looked at him with wide eyes while Teryn stood up. He gave Teryn’s head a nuzzle. “Thank you for waiting to open that until we could be together,” he murmured.

Teryn squeezed the hand that hand snaked around her waist. Lypatri slowly opened the carton and pulled out the brightly colored blanket that was folded on top. “But I already have a blanket.”

“It gets cold here in the winter. You’ll want more than one.” He smiled as she looked at the clothes, many of them somewhat bigger than she needed at the moment. He fully expected that once she had regular access to good food and a safe place to sleep, she’d shoot up. Under the clothes were a few toys. “I didn’t know what kind of toys you would like and we have plenty of toy blasters around, but you can build things with those…” There were some books, too- readers and picture books, and a small pack of crayons.

And at the very bottom was a stuffed loth wolf, the perfect size for snuggling, and the hat with the wolf ears. She gasped, and then sat down, holding the wolf. “But…. but….”

“What’s wrong, cyar’ika?”

“I already have a stuffed animal. And… and….” her voice got wobbly.

Teryn smiled, a little wistfully. “You’ve seen how your ba’vodu’ad has a lot of stuffies, right?” Lypatri nodded, snuffling. “When your ba’vodu and I were little, we didn’t have any. No one in our Tribe did. And you’ve met the al’verde’s ad, right?”

Lypatri nodded. Faris was just so grown up. He was almost an adult.

“He and his siblings only had one between the three of them. Parents like to give their children what they didn’t have. I doubt,” Teryn cocked an eyebrow at Cuan meaningfully, “That you’ll end up with as many stuffed animals as your ba’vodu’ad, but you can certainly have more than one.”

“How many of those did you give him, LaarSenaar?” Cuan grinned, eyes crinkling.

“That is not the point.” Teryn scowled.

Cuan grinned and pressed a kiss to Teryn’s hair, staying away from her hairline. “I have one more thing for you, Kurs’ika.” He rummaged around in one of his own bags and pulled out a small wooden item. “I carved this for you while we were gone.” He handed it to Lypatri, who took it with a slow reverence.

It was a small carved wolf cub, head thrown back in a howl. She blinked back more tears. “Is that… is that me?”

Cuan nodded. “You can keep it in your room, or put it out here next to your Bu’s.” He nodded at the shelf that held the carved wooden bird he’d made, wings spread, beak open in full-throated song. Lypatri put her wolf cub next to it and touched the bird.

“Is this because you sing, Bu?” Lypatri smiled a little. “Jh- my ba’vodu’ad, he played some of the songs while you were gone.” Teryn nodded, noting how Lypatri was taking the instruction to be protective of people’s names seriously. “Will you sing for me sometime?”

“Of course, cyar’ika.” Teryn ran her finger down Lypatri’s nose. Next to the bird was a bergruutfa, one of the large armored quadrapeds from Teloc Ol-sen, clumsily carved, but smooth, as if fingers had run over it for years. Lypatri touched it.

“Who’s is this?”

Cuan smiled sadly. “I carved that for my buir a long time ago.”

Lypatri peeked at him through her hair. “Is he dead?”

Cuan nodded. “He was killed by the same people who are looking for us now.”

Lypatri nodded again, frowning, and touched the bird. “Were they the same bad people who hurt you, Bu?”

Teryn’s jaw and shoulders tensed, but she nodded slowly. “Yes.” This child was smart and good at putting scraps of information together. They’d have to remember that.

Lypatri put the three animals a little bit closer together. “Where’s yours, Buir?” she asked Cuan.

“I never made one for me.“

“Why do they want to kill us?”

Cuan and Teryn exchanged another look, slightly more panicked. “We can talk about that later, cyar’ika,” Cuan said.

“Right now-” Teryn turned to the door as there was a thump, an indignant squawk, then it opened to let Upio fall through, “-why don’t you go tell Upio that you’ll have dinner with them another time?”

“She said no?” Upio looked utterly crushed. “What about your other buir?”

Cuan smirked down at Upio. “We both said no. But nice try.” He nodded at the door. “Tell your buir thank you, but later.”

Upio sagged and groaned exaggeratedly, flung her arms around Lypatri in a hug, said, “We’ll figure out a time for you to help,” and flopped out the door. Lypatri looked at Teryn with some alarmed confusion and slipped her hand around Teryn’s belt. Teryn gave her a reassuring pat on the shoulder as they both heard Upio chirp a greeting to someone else coming towards their door.

Cuan huffed. “We’re popular today.” He grinned as Kata managed to simultaneously swagger and hobble her way in. He gestured to a chair and she plopped down into it with a sigh of relief, dropping a bag of gear beside her.

Lypatri blinked at Kata from behind Teryn’s back. She was still anxious about new people, especially boisterous new people. And Kata was a lot of person, for all that she was short. Kata gave Lypatri a tired wave. “How’s it going, ad’ika? Eyebrows growing in soon?”

“...I have a new stuffed animal.” Lypatri brandished the wolf, then tugged on Teryn’s arm and whispered in her ear. “Can I go finish my packing?” Teryn nodded and Lypatri scooped up the wolf ear hat, jammed it on her head, and ducked into her room.

Teryn fully expected to find her puzzling over a book later rather than having packed a thing. Everything she needed was ready to go anyway, but allowing her a graceful exit was good. She nodded at Kata. Kata grinned back. “How’s she doing?”

“She’s doing okay.” Cuan said. “Early days.” He sat down heavily. He was healed, functionally, but still had a ways to go to get his stamina back. Teryn glanced at him, forehead slightly creased in worry, and he gave her a reassuring smile. “I’m okay. Just a bit tired.” She brushed her fingers under his jaw, looking for the pulse point and he mock-growled. “Don’t take vitals in front of guests. It’s rude.”

She raised an eyebrow at him and turned her attention to Kata, who was grinning broadly at the display. “What’s up?”

“I’m heading off with the tracker chip soon, I was hoping to get some supplies for my foot?” Kata wiggled her injured foot, then grimaced.

Teryn raised an eyebrow. Going to the medbay directly would have been a shorter trip from almost anywhere. “Of course.”

“Good, I think your pilot, the one who… you know… whatever his name is, the one you said would get me a strill if I wanted.” Kata scowled as Teryn tried to control her smile. “Anyway, he said he’d grab me near the medbay.”

“You’re going together?”

“Apparently.” Kata shrugged. “But I need some bandages and stuff, maybe some pain meds? Can you get that for me?”

“Of course.” Teryn picked up Kata’s bag and nodded for the door. As they slowly made their way to the medbay, Teryn glanced sideways at Kata. “Anyone in the med bay could have helped you.”

“Mmmhmmm. So how does it work?”

“How does what work?”

“With the helmets. I assume you’re able to….” Kata made a gesture and a noise that implied a whole host of indelicacy. “Without… you know… pledging your troth or whatever.”

“Oh!” Teryn blushed, then grinned. “The helmet stays on.”

“What.”

“Yeah.”

Kata stopped, frowning. “So….”

“Everything you’re thinking, the answer is yes. Are there people who have skirted around the rules by having it be completely dark or by using blindfolds? Yes. But…” Teryn grinned wickedly. “There’s something to be said for it.”

Kata blinked several times before putting her own helmet on. “Huh.”

“Yup.”

“So you…”

“Yes.”

“And Cuan…”

“Not your business.”

“Huh.” Kata was silent the rest of the way to the med bay, was silent when Teryn handed her a pack with the needed medical supplies in it, along with a few extras, just in case of trouble, and was silent as they waited for Ordo to arrive with the ship. _It’s Kata and Ordo,_ Teryn thought, _there will definitely be trouble, just an unexpected kind._

Kata shifted nervously when the Talon landed neatly outside the med bay, then threw her shoulders back and looked at Teryn. “We’ll be back as soon as we can. Don’t get married until we do.” She shrugged as Teryn gave her a slightly startled look. “What? I like cake.”

Leh’mu was off the main hyperspace routes, so getting back to Samaki would take some time. The fastest route would have been to go back to Dantooine and take the 12 hour trip from there, but neither Din nor Zake wanted to do that.

No, the safest route would take close to twenty four hours. Twenty four hours in close quarters.

Din thought he was going to die.

Of embarrassment, mostly. He shouldn’t have… he just shouldn’t have. She had fallen back asleep after eating and Jha’iil was still working on his drawing. The bath the child would need was going to be epic but he was happy. Din stayed down in the hold so he could keep an eye on Jha’iil…. But also he could watch her sleep.

Peaceful and relaxed. Content that she was safe with him.

He heard the comm unit blare up in the cockpit and climbed up. Odds were it was Cara, yelling at him for leaving her. He admitted to himself that he’d completely forgotten she was even there. Every fiber of his being was suddenly so focused on _getting to Iruz’zake_ that nothing else had mattered.

He didn’t want to examine what that could mean, but what else was there to do in the dark of space?

He liked Zake. She was kind, and brave, and generous. She had never asked him awkward questions, or tried to get his helmet off ( _unlike other twi’leks he could name_ ) and gave him a small place where he could breathe. Even when he showed up on her doorstep with an awkward passenger… or three… she accepted it without hesitation, and gave them the help they needed without question.

If she had any feelings for him, they were surely rooted in gratitude for what he had done for her. Nothing more. What could he possibly offer other than the occasional meeting, danger around every corner, and heartache?

The message wasn’t from Cara. It was from Teryn. “So… don’t worry, everything is fine, but take your time getting back. There’s a tracking chip in play. Check back in about 24 hours and we’ll let you know. Also, we’re both in trouble with Alor because I didn’t exactly let her know that you left, but you’re in a bit more trouble than me.”

“Trouble? Is there trouble?”

Din turned sharply at Zake’s voice behind him. “...no, not really. Just some… family things.” She gave him a smile as she handed up Jha’iil to him. Jha’iil had a piece of fruit in one hand and his drawing in the other and he waved it at Din. “Look!”

Din took Jha’iil and set him in his seat, and dutifully took the drawing. There were several tallish figures on it, and two shorter ones. “What’s this, ad’ika?”

Jha’iil pointed to one figure. “Buir!” Then at one of the shorter ones. “Me!” Din found himself smiling as Jha’iil explained that the figures were “Ba’vodu, Kursh, Kurska, Tutal…” and the other shorter, smaller figure, “Atin!”

Zake cocked her head in a silent question. Din huffed a laugh. “It’s a family picture.” She grinned at Jha’iil.

“It’s beautiful.”

“Give to ba’vodu?”

“Yes, we can give it to her if you want. I’m sure she’ll like it.” Din had found some magnets in a shop in Nevarro once and used one to stick the drawing on the wall by the ladder.

“Ba’vodu….” Zake frowned. “Parent’s sibling, yes?...that must be your sister?”

Din tilted his head. “Where have you been learning Mando’a?”

Zake shrugged and her blue cheeks darkened. “I found an old dictionary from the Clone Wars. I studied it.”

“Oh.” Din shifted in the pilot’s seat uncomfortably. “I’m sorry that I made you uncomfortable before, I shouldn’t have…” He trailed off as Zake glanced over at Jha’iil, who’s eyes were drooping, then at Din, speculatively.

“Stay there.” She climbed down into the hold, and Din frowned to himself as he heard her rummaging around, then she climbed up again, with Jha’iil’s travel blanket tossed over on shoulder, a towel over the other, and holding a bowl of steaming water. She put the water down near Din’s feet and tucked the blanket around Jha’iil, murmuring in Rhyl.

Jha’iil smiled sleepily and cuddled down into his blanket. Zake ran a finger along his ear, then turned her attention to Din. She knelt down in front of him, and he sat forward. “I don’t think…”

“Stay. There.” She carefully unbuckled the ammunition that was fastened around his boot, and twitched an eyebrow at it. “This seems uncomfortable.”

“I’m used to it.” Din held himself rigid as she worked off the greaves covering both shins, and then his boots.

“You’ve been wearing these for at least a day and a half.” She set the boots to the side.

“I changed my socks.”

“Mmmhmm.” She pulled off his socks and draped them on the jumpseat behind her, and picked up one foot. “I’m going to guess you haven’t paid much attention to these since, well…”

_Since the last time I gave you a foot massage._

Din had tried to forget about that foot massage. He’d tried very hard, but as she took the towel, wet it in the bowl, and used it to start to wash one foot, he let out a breath. She didn’t give any indication she’d heard him, continuing to wash first one foot, then the other.

It felt nice. The water was warm and her hands were gentle and it was a rare experience to sit back and just exist for a little while, but...

Any thoughts he might have had came to a complete stop when she began to dig into the sole of his foot with her strong fingers.

He let out a groan. She smiled, and dug in again.

Solde was taking her turn at the comms watch overnight. Kata and Ordo had left with the tracker. Everyone was anxiously waiting to see if they’d need to evacuate or not. The early warning systems had been checked and some of the backup systems had been pressed into service as well. In addition to the usual sentries at the top edge of the valley, a few of the Samaki ships were taking watches further out from the planet.

Each ship would check in every hour. If anyone saw anything suspicious, she would contact Rima and the Nevarro alor immediately. In theory, they were supposed to be sleeping, but Solde knew her own alor. Rima was not asleep. Nor were many other people.

Deep in the night, an unfamiliar comm code popped up on the channel she’d left the code for on Taris. Solde frowned at it suspiciously. Yes, she’d written it in Mando’a, but that didn’t mean that it couldn’t be found and read by someone else.

On the other hand… it might be exactly what they were hoping for. She accepted the message.

It was a text message, transliterated into Basic. “Haat, ijaa, haa'it. We’re looking for some lost sheep.”

Solde smiled. Yes, she’d heard the term sheep being used to describe a lost Mandalorian before. She got up to let Rima know that something, at least, appeared to be going right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For Cuan's buir, I wanted something like a moose, and a bergruutfa seemed to fit the bill. https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Bergruutfa
> 
> Kurs'ika art by the esteemed SRed
> 
> Mando'a Translations
> 
> Kotep: Brave  
> Beroya: bounty hunter  
> al'baar'ur: Doctor  
> Alor: chief  
> Buir: parent (Diminutive: Bu)  
> Kurs'ika: wolfcub  
> al’verde bajur: Commander of education (Author concept but hey, it makes sense)  
> Cyar'ika: sweetheart  
> Ba'vodu'ad: cousin (parent's sibling's child)  
> Ba'vodu: parent's sibling  
> LaarSenaar: Songbird  
> ad'ika: Little one, kid  
> Haat, ijaa, haa'it: Truth, honor, vision - words used to seal a pact.


	43. So long as you come home at the end of the day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lots and lots of domestic soft, some feelings. Okay, several feelings.

Feralia Styr drummed her fingers as she waited anxiously for a response to her message. She had known -they’d all known- that splitting up was a terrible idea. But the alor had made the decision to leave the children with their only warriors while the rest of the Tribe tried to sort out a new place to settle. They only had the two actual warriors- the rest of them were civilians. Tradespeople. Farmers. They could assimilate and blend, to a point.

But it was hard to realize that your children were growing up less Mando’ade and more Tarisian. The adults worried about it and wondered what to do. They debated, considered, and discussed the issue exhaustively, but they had scratched out a place. They were safe- sort of. The decision to go or stay was agonizing.

The former alor had become obsessed with leaving and finally said that the warriors should remain with the children while the rest of his people tried to amass as many credits as possible. He would try to find a Tribe to join with so they could raise the children right. Could you even truly keep to the Resol’nare when you didn’t have anyone who could work the beskar and make armor? The warriors tried to teach the children as much self-defense as they could, but there were only two of them and they needed every pair of hands to work in order to scratch out a living. So everyone had bid goodbye to the children, told them to be good and they’d be back as soon as possible, and left.

The remaining adults had only discovered that the children were missing when there was no response to a pre-arranged check in. They’d gone back to Taris to find their home abandoned, their children and warriors gone, along with the strill, and the only thing anyone knew was that there had been some shootout near the wastelands.

But there had been the message carved into the wall. The Tribe had discussed it at length- was it a trap? Without the alor there to make a final decision, the tribe turned to Feralia. She had been the one to argue most passionately against splitting up, against leaving the children behind, and she’d been the first one to say they should send the message.

Her own daughter, Kurshi, was among the missing. The fact that they hadn’t found Edeemir was actually comforting. Edeemir would never leave the children if he could help it and he would protect them.

There was no reply to the increasingly frantic comms to the alor.

“ _We have some sheep and a sheepdog.”_

Feralia let out a breath, then let herself have a good cry. Something, at least, appeared to be going right.

Teryn and Cuan tucked Lypatri into bed. She had laid out clothes to change into in a hurry and her boots were carefully set by the door in case they needed to leave in the middle of the night. “Do you think we’ll need to?” Lypatri asked, worried

“We’re not sure, Kurs’ika. But some things have happened to make us think that there’s a chance, so it’s best to be prepared. What do you do if we get the alarm?”

“I get dressed, and I stay with Buir.”

“That’s right.” Cuan tucked one of her curls behind her ear. “Your Bu will need to go to the medbay, but you and I will take care of each other, right?”

“Right.” Lypatri snuggled down under her new blanket. The one from Saojeme was carefully folded at the foot of her bed. Both the mythosaur and the lothwolf were in her arms and the hat was set on her nightstand.

“Sleep well, Cyar’ika.”

Lypatri nodded, but her eyes were big and wide and a bit scared. Teryn fully expected that she would be sleeping under the desk again; she hadn’t had a chance to talk to the child about that yet, but there was time. Whatever she needed to do to feel safe.

Safe. Teryn wrinkled her nose a little. Safe was a construct. She wished Din was back. She wished she knew what was happening out in the wider galaxy. Safety had always been such a precarious thing but it was easier to handle when her whole family was in arm’s reach.

Teryn walked into the sleeping room, holding the small jar of cream from Zake, frowning tensely.

“What’s that, LaarSenaar?” Cuan was, as was his habit, naked. He generally slept in the nude when at home. Teryn preferred to have something on, since middle of the night calls were usually for her and usually had no time to waste.

“It’s um. It’s supposed to help with scars.” She glanced at him sideways, anxious.

One of his hands unconsciously went to the scars on his torso. “For me?” He tilted his head as her shoulders got tenser and her eyes flicked away from him. “Or for you?”

“...my ori’vod’s… his… friend… she gave this to me for…”

“For your back?” He asked it softly and patted the bed in front of him when she nodded slightly. She sat down in front of him and after a deep breath, pulled up the back of her shirt over her head, holding it defensively in front of her. He ran a hand down her spine, trying to help her relax, but she just sat, rigid. He moved her hair over one shoulder so it all hung in front.

He took the small jar and looked at the scars, really looked at them. They were thick and raised- deep burns. Normally he ignored them- he knew she was beyond self-conscious of them so he made it a point to neither avoid them or emphasize them. But for this… for this he’d have to focus on them.

Teryn stared at the wall, trying to imagine herself anywhere but where she was. The truth was she had never seen the full extent of the scars. Never having a mirror that was large enough helped but she’d avoided even trying. She knew they were bad. She knew they were extensive. All she could remember of the getting of them was the searing pain and, of course, the hands on her face. Andrys had seen them once and would not stop asking about them until she held a knife to his throat. He’d never asked again, and she’d never let him see them again.

And now she would feel exactly where each one was, and how wide, and how long. There was no hiding from it.

Cuan pressed a kiss to the top of her spine before getting started, rubbing the cream into each scar, and he felt her slip further and further away. As he finished with the last one, she started to tremble. He covered the jar, set it aside, and helped her pull her shirt back down, covering the map the trauma had drawn. Then without a word, he pulled her back to his chest, wrapped his arms around her, and let her shake.

“Gar morut'yc, cyare. Ner olar, gar morut'yc.” _You’re safe, beloved. I’m here, you’re safe._

Kata busied herself with familiarizing herself with the Talon as Ordo got them in the air. It wasn’t a large ship- larger than the Razor Crest, but then most things were. It had a few cabins, with, Kata noted, real mattresses, a fully stocked kitchen unit, including fresh behot. She tucked the supplies she’d gotten from Teryn in next to the other full medkits.

The weapons locker was well-stocked and she could see there were other weapons strategically stashed around the ship. She nodded approvingly. Ordo had prepared well.

The tracking chip was sealed in a small box made of beskar. The Nevarro alor and Sadet had both thought beskar was more likely than anything else to block its transmissions, if they could even be blocked. “Bring that back,” Sadet had said gruffly. “Don’t want to waste it in whatever fucking hole you’re going to throw it in.”

Kata smiled to herself. No, of course she wouldn’t waste the beskar.

The cockpit didn’t require a ladder, thank the stars. She could have managed, of course, but given the choice, she’d rather have not. Was it really less than five days since the rescue mission? Four? She wasn’t entirely sure.

In the cockpit, Ordo was flipping through the nav computer. He gave her a nod as she sat down. “Looking at our options.”

“Yeah? What’re you thinking?”

“Someplace that if they follow it there, it’ll be miserable for them,” Ordo grunted. Kata nodded. Smart.

“Cold or hot?”

“Cold. Those motherfuckers could barely be bothered to put heating elements in trooper armor when they were the Empire. Now?” Ordo smirked. “It’ll kill them faster.” He tilted his head down at the nav system. “What about this one?”

“Maldo Kreis?” Kata frowned to herself. “Ice planet… doesn’t it have those big ugly.. What’re they called, rav- rev….ragnaks?”

“Ravinaks, yes. They eat shit, literally.” Ordo turned his helmet to her and said with an unmistakable grin in his voice, “Sounds like fun.” He punched in the coordinates, and they entered hyperspace.

Kreez hesitated outside the medbay with a covered plate. He’d made sure to send good broth and smoothies for Vha- he would have for anyone, but when Teryn had told him who it was they brought back, he’d made sure to be extra careful with the food he made for her.

He remembered Vha quite well, along with her older brother Vayez. He remembered them as demolishing piles of sweet bean paste dumplings, always one right behind the other. He remembered them as a team, sometimes followed by their littlest vod, Faris, and sometimes following him to keep him out of trouble.

But the most important thing he remembered was the two of them always together. He’d assumed they were still together, in the manda.

Kreez softly knocked on her door. He’d never brought her the food himself, but the clean up after dinner was over and he’d seen the light on in her room. He’d been trying to decide if he should send the dumplings, or just bring them himself, or what, and finally just went “fuck it” and put a small pile of them in a bowl.

“Come in,” she said, quietly, in the tone of someone who didn’t believe a knock was a request at all.

He opened the door slowly. She was sitting on the bed, but staring out the window. He saw her eyes flick to his reflection in the window, then back outside, but she had no other reaction. He set the plate down on her bedside table and took off the cover and waited. Either curiosity or the odor would get her attention.

It was the smell. He heard her take a sniff, then another, and she finally turned around. “Are those…?”

“I made them for you.”

Vha glanced at the pile of small dumplings. “...I don’t think I can eat that many.”

Kreez shrugged. “I made enough for me to have some, too.” He sat down in the chair next to her bed and popped one of the dumplings under his helmet, into his mouth. “I didn’t want to disturb you earlier…”

Vha eyed him warily, but shifted slightly so she could reach a dumpling. She worried at it with her hands, then tore off a small piece and ate it. “I would dream about these sometimes.”

Kreez gave a small nod.

Vha paused, considering her stomach to see if the bit of dumpling would stay where it was supposed to. When it appeared that it would, she took another small bite. “They said I had to be careful not to stress my stomach.” She stared at the remains of the bun and set it down on the table. “The al’baar’ur- she said you were on Canto?”

Kreez nodded. “Ended up there. Cooked for a while. She and the beroya found my cooking and, well-” He gestured to encompass the Covert. “Here I am.”

Vha nodded. “It seems nice here.” She started to run the fingers of one hand over scars on her wrist. Shackle scars, Kreez realized.

“It is.”

Vha nodded again. “I, um. I hoped you were somewhere. Alive. I knew you weren’t home, so…” she shrugged. “I hoped.”

Kreez sighed quietly. “Do you want to get outside for a bit? It’s a nice night and fresh air…”

Vha glanced out the window again. She hadn’t been outside or even really out this room since the moment she’d seen her Buir. One the one hand, it would be nice to get out. On the other hand, this room was safe.

Safe-ish.

“Maybe a short walk?” Kreez stood up. “Just around the building.” He covered the plate again and held out an arm.

Vha untangled her legs from the blankets and stood up shakily. “Sure.” She shoved her feet into some slippers and took Kreez’s arm for balance. Fresh air did seem like a good idea and it was dark. No one would stare at her.

Kreez and Vha walked around the back of the medbay. There was a small grove of trees with places to sit. Saojeme spent most of her time in the main gardens growing food and behot but she had carefully cultivated this spot with shade-loving flowers, including some that bloomed only at night. Vha leaned down to touch one of the blooms lightly.

There was the sound of someone politely clearing his throat and Vha whipped around, crouched defensively. Faris stood at the edge of the grove, without his helmet, without his training armor, looking like the teenager he was. “It’s just me, ori’vod.”

Kreez nodded at Faris, set the plate of dumplings down on one of the seats, and quietly faded away, back to his kitchen. Vha had eaten the dumplings with Vayez, back when they could no longer see each other’s faces. She deserved to have that with her younger brother as well, before she lost his face, as well.

Faris, being a nearly 14 year old, wasted no time in going after the dumplings. “He hasn’t made these since he got back.”

Vha nodded, slowly sitting on the edge of the seat. She picked up another dumpling and started to worry at it. “You should be swearing soon.”

Faris nodded, mouth full. “Yeah. I’m still… I’m trying to decide.”

Vha frowned at him. “If you’re going to?”

“Which… how I’m going to. I don’t know if I want to… lose everyone.” He looked at her and shrugged apologetically. “I’ve been thinking about it for a while.”

Vha nodded slowly. “Have you… have you talked to b- I mean. What’s he said about it?”

“I haven’t talked to him since he… since you. I haven’t talked to him since you came back.”

“Oh.” Vha nibbled on the dumpling. “I haven’t seen him either. I had a dream he came to see me, but… it was just a dream.”

Teryn finally drifted off just before dawn and Cuan had felt the moment when she did. He had dozed, off and on, always able to tell that she was still awake. Maybe it had been a bad idea to use the cream, especially when they had no idea if they were going to need to bug out or not. Maybe he should have pushed against it, but he also knew that if she’d worked up the nerve to use it, then it was better to follow through.

That didn’t mean it was easy. Once she was asleep, once exhaustion finally won, he let himself sleep, too.

He was woken up by a timid knock on the sleeping room door. “Buir?”

He rubbed his face and looked down at Teryn, still asleep, curled into a tight ball. “Yes, ad’ika?”

“Um. There’s someone here for you? I wasn’t sure if I was supposed to answer the door but you weren’t awake yet…” Lypatri said hesitantly from outside the door.

“I’ll be out in just a minute, ad’ika.” He got out of the bed, giving Teryn’s hair a soft brush with his fingers before pulling on a pair of pants. Out in the living room, the first thing he saw was Atin, sitting watchfully in the middle of the room, tail curled around his feet, staring at Ademe who was standing by the door. Right by the door, eyeing the cat with some trepidation.

“Al’verde,” Cuan grinned. Atin flicked his ears at the sound of Cuan’s voice and moved to sit directly in front of him. Cuan smirked and gave Atin a quick scratch behind the ears. “How can we help you?” Lypatri darted into her room and peeked out.

“We got a message from...well, we think it’s from the Taris group, but…” Ademe shrugged. “Anyway, get dressed, Rima wants to discuss the procedure with you.” She gave Lypatri a grin. “Hey, ad’ika, sorry to make you wake your buire. You should be getting your first helmet soon, right?”

Lypatri blinked owlishly then cut her eyes to Cuan. Cuan smiled and nodded. “Soon.” Lypatri looked back and Ademe and nodded solemnly. Ademe gave her a wink and left, giving Atin one final, wary look.

Atin smugly rubbed against Cuan’s leg. He had defended their home and now, now he would go check on his The Lady. Perhaps extend his morning nap. He strutted into the sleeping room. Cuan looked at Lypatri and grinned. “Should we start the day, cyar’ika? Duty calls.”

“What about Bu?”

“She can sleep a bit longer. It was a rough night.” Cuan nodded at her room. “Go get dressed.”

Lypatri nodded and looked at the clothes they had laid out if they got the alert to bug out. They were some of the new ones and she just wasn’t sure about them yet. She got into her old things but made sure to put her wolf ears hat on.

Cuan finished getting clothes on but his armor was still with Sadet, including his helmet. He felt vaguely naked without it- but he had his own mythosaur amulet. He nodded at Lypatri, noting that she was wearing her old clothes but letting it be. He grinned at the wolf ear hat. He’d known she was going to love it.

They started out into the main compound. “Do you have training today?”

“I’m not sure.” She trotted alongside him. “Can I ask you something?”

“Sure.”

“...Bu doesn’t wear a helmet.”

“No, she doesn’t.”

“So… should I?” Lypatri whispered. “Will it make her mad?”

Cuan stopped and looked down at his wolf cub, who trotted ahead for a few steps before realizing he wasn’t beside her. She turned around and looked at him worriedly, afraid she’d overstepped and done something wrong. He smiled reassuringly. “It won’t make her mad. This is part of being raised as a Mandalorian warrior.”

“Oh.” Lypatri chewed on her lip. “Will it make her sad?”

Cuan tilted her head as he gave the question the consideration it deserved. “It might, but she won’t want you to worry about that. She’ll want you to be able to make the choice to swear the Creed when you turn 14 and part of that means getting your first helmet.”

“Oh.” Lypatri nodded after some more thought. “Okay.”

“Ad’ika, your bu wants you to grow up happy. Part of that is trying not to worry about grown up things. You get to be a kid, you get to learn and play and train, and that’s your job. Okay?”

“Okay.” Lypatri turned towards the training hall and took off at a run as she saw Upio waiting anxiously for her. Upio flung her arms around Lypatri and hugged her fiercely.

“No training today. Come on!”

The two girls ran off towards Upio’s quarters. Cuan chuckled to himself. Those two were going to be trouble, he was certain. It was always gratifying how the children of the Covert would accept a new kid and help them find their place. The chaos of those two, however… he should ask Atriu to keep an eye on her new cousin. She might not be able to stop them, but at least they’d get accurate reports.

Upio dragged Lypatri inside. “Did you tell them?”

“Of course not!” Lypatri said, aghast.

Upio, her buir, and her ori’vod lived in quarters off the side of her buir’s workshop. Upio’s buir was called Kalni, and was in charge of making and repairing a lot of the Tribe’s soft goods- undergear, belts, gambesons. Her armor was a rich, dark orange, and she had a blaster in one holster and scissors in the other.

Upio waved cheerfully at her buir. “I found her!”

Kalni gave Lypatri a smile. “Did my chaos child let you have breakfast?”

Lypatri shook her head. Kalni gave Upio a mock scowl. “Feed your guest. Then we can get to work.” Upio dragged Lyaptri over to the kitchen and rummaged in the conservator for food. She made Lypatri a sandwich and quickly made herself one, too.

The door opened, and a young warrior entered, pulling off her helmet and shaking out her sweated down hair. “Mornin’ Buir.”

Kalni smiled and patted her oldest on the cheek. “Morning, Eatha, my angle.”

Lypatri slid her eyes over to Upio. Upio shrugged. “Eatha couldn’t say ‘angel’ when she was little, so she’s been Buir’s angle ever since.” She grinned. “I’m her triangle, because I am very trying.”

“Yes you are, ner kar’ta.” Kalni ruffled Upio’s hair affectionately and asked Eatha, “How was sentry duty?” Kalni asked.

“Quiet but they had us flying circles all night.” Eatha rolled her neck. “I’m exhausted.”

“Get something to eat and get some sleep. We’ll be in the workshop.” Kalni nodded at Lypatri and Upio. Upio had wolfed down her sandwich. Lypatri had eaten half and was wrapping the other half in a napkin.

Upio snorted. “You don’t have to save that. There’s plenty of food.”

Lypatri looked startled. She hadn’t even realized that she’d done it- saving food for later was such a habit for her. She had never known when her next meal was. She slowly put the half a sandwich down. “...I’m sorry.”

Kalni glared at her youngest, then gave Lypatri a gentle smile. “Don’t worry about it. Are you good? Shall we get started?”

In the workroom, Kalni had laid out some leather with a pattern for a sheath traced on it. “I’ll help you cut one out, then you can do the other. Okay?”

Lypatri nodded with uncertainty, and watched as Kalni cut out the pieces of a simple knife sheath. She then tried to cut a second one out herself, but some of the edges were a bit wobbly. Lypatri looked fearfully at Kalni.

“That’s okay, ad’ika. It’s why we cut them a little big, so we can trim them down.” Kalni rummaged around in the shelves and came up with two stencils- a bird in flight and a wolf on guard- that would fit on the sheaths. Lypatri touched one.

“Sadet is still making the knives, but we’ll decorate them when they’re ready.” Kalni smiled at the two girls. “Upio, show her how we stitch the leather. We’ll have these ready for the ridduurok celebration.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Different_Frequency noted that Lypatri doesn't so much have a nervous system as she is one. She's a good kid. 
> 
> Art by Kmandofan90 THANK YOUUUUUU 
> 
> Mando'a Translations
> 
> Alor: Chief  
> Buir: parent (Diminutive, Bu)  
> Cyar'ika: Sweetheart  
> LaarSenaar: Songbird  
> ori'vod: older sibling  
> Vod: sibling  
> Beroya: Bounty hunter  
> al'baar'ur: Doctor  
> ad'ika: little one, kid


	44. And I have moved and kept on moving

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meetings, greetings, and coming home.

Din climbed down from the cockpit after making the last course adjustment to get them near Samaki. He hadn’t received an all-clear yet but once they were nearby, he’d be able to get them home quickly.

After she’d finished the foot massage (and it had been a great massage) she had said her head was aching and went back down to take some of the pain medication they’d gotten and to rest more. Jha’iil had wandered down there at some point after demanding a snack, a story, and more cuddles.

Home. It was still a strange thought. But it was feeling more and more comfortable. He smiled to himself. Nevarro hadn’t really been home- he barely spent any time there. He would come in, deliver his credits, have repairs seen to, and, almost always, leave right away.

Now? With a larger, vibrant Covert, where they didn’t have to rely quite so much on his ability to provide? He could have a space that was his. Help with training the Foundlings. Brush up on some of his skills. Rest. Let Jha’iil have some time to be a Mandalorian child. Be with his family.

He looked around for his kid. He found him in the sleeping compartment, snuggled down in Zake’s arms, both of them asleep.

Din smiled, then felt his heart skip a beat. They looked so comfortable together, so right. Jha’iil didn’t relax so deeply into sleep with just anyone. Teryn, of course. Tuathal. H’lava. The Armorer, on rare occasions. And now Zake.

Jha’iil stirred and blinked his big eyes and gave Din a radiant smile. No matter how often he saw his kid’s smile, no matter how often he saw how _genuinely happy_ Jha’iil was to see him, it gave him a little thrill. Jha’iil crawled to the end of the cot and held up his arms. As Din reached down to pick him up, Jha’iil made a worried trill and looked at Zake, ears drooping. Din frowned and looked at her more closely. Her face was tight and it looked like there was swelling in her head on the side of the injured lek. It was hard to tell under the scarf, but…

He picked up Jha’iil and shook Zake’s foot. “Hey. Wake up.”

She groaned and one hand went up to the root of her lek. “Hurts.” She kept her eyes closed and writhed a little. “Hurts so much.”

Din froze, thinking rapidly. Pulling on a lekku could cause damage. Serious damage. He’d thought, hoped, that she’d been lucky enough to avoid it, but it looked like the luck had run out. The medkit he’d been able to get on Leh’mu was for minor injuries, nothing like this. There was a route -a slightly dodgy one- that could get them home considerably quicker. Hell with waiting for clearance. She needed help, help that he trusted, and she needed it fast. That meant one person in the galaxy.

“Hold on.” Din got another cold, wet towel and handed it to her to hold to her head. “I’ll get us to help as soon as I can.” He climbed up to the cockpit, keeping Jha’iil with him. If they weren’t able to land, then maybe…. But he couldn’t make that ask. He _shouldn’t_.

Rima and the Armorer discussed it at length, how they would meet with the people from Taris, how they would determine if they were legitimate or not. Neither alor wanted to just give them the location to the valley, not without determining if they were, in fact, who they claimed to be.

The Armorer looked out the window at the pile of children playing on the rocks. “What is the age of the oldest child?”

Rima frowned, looking at her notes. “Twelve.”

“Old enough to make an identification. Between the child and the strill….” The Armorer and Rima exchanged a look of perfect understanding. The Armorer was inclined to defer to Rima when it came to making decisions about giving out the location of their Covert. However, they both agreed that the fewer people who knew precisely where they were, the better.

“There’s a nearby moon…” Rima brought up a starmap and pointed. “We can meet them here with the kid and the strill… if they check out, then we can have one of our people pilot their ship in….”

The Armorer nodded. “Warriors, just in case?”

“Yeah. Who do you have in mind?”

In the end, Solde went up with a handful of warriors, Edeemir, and the oldest child, Daui. Atriu stayed with the rest of the children while the other warriors rotated in and out of sentry duty. The children all knew something was up, and several of them were very anxious about being separated from Edeemir again. Edeemir, for his part, was also uneasy. But he clearly did not like the idea of letting Daui go anywhere alone, so he stuck by their side, keeping his eyes on the rest of his children as long as he could.

All of the children, every single one, banded together in one large group. Some of them had their helmets, some didn’t, but more than one adult looked over to see one or another of the Taris kids trying on a training helmet.

“You see,” one of the Samaki kids explained to their buir, “They didn’t have any helmets, where they came from. So we let them try ours.”

“How many tested them by running into walls?”

“Oh, all of them.”

The Taris kids had been told they might have made contact with their families and they were going to find out if it was really them. They were all equal parts anxious and worried and excited. The Samaki Herd and the Nevarro Foundlings all swarmed around them as distraction and support.

Teryn had woken up with only Atin curled up on her pillow, an empty space at her back, and the covers securely tucked around her. She smiled a bit- on the rare occasions he woke up before she did, he always made sure she was tucked in. It was yet another one of the little things that she loved about him.

If Cuan was already up and about, that meant Lypatri was probably also up and causing trouble. She hadn’t been woken up by an explosion, so the trouble wasn’t serious. Most likely. She stretched and groaned as her back popped and settled into place. She hadn’t slept that tensely for a while.

She eyed the jar of scar cream beside the bed but left it. Thank all the stars, it was unscented. At least she wouldn’t have to associate a scent with having to relive that trauma. It had, honestly, been horrible. He’d been so gentle, so matter of fact about it. But it was still horrible.

Out in the living space, she brewed up some caff and watched as Atin stalked into Lypatri’s room. He was doing his hunting crouch, tail twitching, and then pounced with a yowl. He emerged with a rodent in his mouth and pranced to the door. He preferred to eat his kill outside.

Teryn set her mug down and obligingly opened the door. Atin went out and inhaled the rodent while she glanced at Lypatri’s room, frowning. Much as she’d like to give the kid her privacy… that was worrying. The buildings were old, and there were plenty of ways for rodents to squirm their way in. Generally, the scent of loth cat kept them out of their rooms, so what would have enticed them to come in?

Inside Lypatri’s room, things were deceptively tidy, but there was something tucked under the desk. Teryn pulled it out and found a small bag of food that had a hole chewed into the side of it. She sighed, looking at the things inside. It was scraps left over from meals, a few cookies, and one of the red bean paste dumplings that Kreez made. She sat on the floor and glanced under the bed and found a stash there, as well. And in one of the drawers.

Teryn rubbed her face and brought the food into the kitchen unit. The bag that had been attacked by rodents was for the trash, obviously, but the others… she put them into the cooling unit until they could figure out what to do about it. She sighed. Hoarding food didn’t seem entirely out of the realm of expected behavior but she wasn’t sure what to do about it.

She was just finishing her caff when the comm unit went off. It was Tabor. “Um. The beroya just commed and said he will be back in an hour or so, he wants you to meet him at the medbay.”

Teryn narrowed her eyes as her stomach dropped. Something had clearly gone wrong. “Did he say anything else?”

“No, no specifics. He kept the communication as short as he could.” Tabor said, then added softly, “Sorry.”

Teryn took a breath, counted to three, and let it out. “I’ll be there in a few minutes. Make sure the trauma bay is ready for… whatever.” She ended the call and growled. Of course he wanted to keep the comm short and make it less likely to be intercepted, but couldn’t he at least have said who was injured? What kind of injury? Did she need to rummage around in his guts again?

She slammed the last of the caff and eyed her shock batons in their usual spot on the weapons rack by the door. Normally she didn’t carry them at home but there was a small warning bell going off in the back of her mind. She slapped them into their holsters at her back, just in case.

While crossing the compound to the medbay, she saw Rima watching the children. Some of the oldest ones were working with the kids from Taris, teaching them hand to hand fighting techniques. There was a break in the action as Faris and one of the older Samaki kids began to debate the effectiveness of a certain arm bar. Rima smiled and gave Teryn a nod. “They found out that the new kids hadn’t had much training. They’re trying to make up the deficit as much as they can.”

Teryn smiled as one of the Taris kids clumsily tried a take down that his sparring partner allowed while Upio shouted encouragement. The kid grinned proudly, then nodded seriously as his partner gave him some notes, then they tried it again. She saw Lypatri watching carefully through narrowed eyes, taking it in, making mental notes. “Our beroya is coming in, he wants me to meet him at the medbay.” Teryn raised an eyebrow at Rima, hoping she would get her meaning.

Rima nodded slowly, thinking. “I’ll send up extra sentries, increase the alert level. We’re hoping the Tribe these children belong to will be here later today.” Teryn nodded and continued to the medbay. Tabor had set up everything the way she’d taught him, and made a small wiggle of happiness at her nod of approval.

“Who all do we have here?” she asked, frowning. “I count two?” Cormu, who was out of the bacta tank but still hadn’t regained consciousness. She was beginning to lose hope that he would. And there was Vha.

“Well, technically, but the al’verde’s youngest has been sleeping here.” Tabor twisted his fingers anxiously. She nodded, thinking. She and Roccan hadn’t gone over the plan for evacuating the medbay- the subject hadn’t come up until after he’d left. Moving Vha would be easy. Moving Cormu… slightly more complicated. Then there was whatever Din was bringing home with him.

“Maybe my vod’ad scraped his knee or something and my ori’vod is over-reacting.” She glanced at Tabor but they both knew that was unlikely. “We should figure out where we can move everyone. Just in case.”

Tabor nodded. “There’s a lower level where we can move everyone if we need to…” he glanced at Teryn, questioningly. “I can check it out and see if I can figure out how best to do that…”

“Yes, good thought.” She gave him a smile. “Go do that and bring a hoverstretcher into his room, just so we’ll have it ready.” Tabor scampered off and she laughed to herself. He was absolutely blooming here. He was taking more initiative and learning management as well.

Teryn poked around the trauma room a little before being interrupted by a quiet knock. She turned to see Kalni standing at the door, flipping her scissors in one hand like a knife and smiling. Teryn had met her briefly at the bonfire so many weeks ago, but hadn’t had a chance (Or, she admitted, made any effort) to get to know her at all. That was true of almost everyone in the Samaki tribe. She was still extremely wary around new people, to the point of avoidance whenever she could.

“Hi, I know we met before, but now that our kids are…” Kalni grinned. “I’m Upio’s buir. She’s decided your kid is her best friend.”

“Oh.” Teryn hesitantly smiled. “How does my Kurs’ika feel about that?”

“She seems a little overwhelmed, but Upio is a lot of person.” Kalni grinned fondly. “She’s very happy to have another girl her own age to show around.”

“It’s good that my ad’ika has someone. It’s all new to her.” Teryn gave a ghost of a smile. “To all of us.”

“Mmhmm. I wanted to ask….” Kalni paused as she tried to figure out the best way to say what she needed to. “I gave her breakfast this morning… no, no,” she holstered her scissors and held up her hands as Teryn flushed, mortified that someone already thought she was a terrible parent, “Upio just hauled her away before she had a chance to eat anything. Anyway, she tried to save some of it for later.”

“Ah.” Teryn nodded. “‘I don’t think she’s ever really had enough to eat.”

“I thought I’d mention it.” Kalni smiled kindly. “It’s not uncommon.”

“Thank you.” Teryn eyed her warily for a breath. “I did… I did find food stashed around her room, which… I don’t want to object to her doing things that make her feel safer, but-”

“The rodents are terrible.” Kalni nodded. “We could use more loth cats. Even saw the strill catch one.”

“Do you have any suggestions?” Teryn asked after a brief hesitation. “About the hoarding.”

“Mmmm. Well, you can’t let her just have food tucked away. I’d give her a sealed box and have her use that. And once a week she needs to clean it out.” Kalni shrugged. “Usually after a few weeks or a month or so they calm down.”

“She sleeps under her desk, too.” Teryn said quietly. “We haven’t talked about that either.”

“It’s been busy.” Kalni turned to greet Cuan, who came in with his armor bag. “Hey. You need your undergear repaired at all?”

“Hey, Kalni.” Cuan gave her a grin, but his attention was on Teryn, forehead slightly creased in worry. _How are you, after last night?_ She gave him a smile and a nod. _I’m okay._ He smiled and reached to give her waist a squeeze. She shifted slightly, pushing his arm down but catching his wrist and giving him a squeeze, flicking her eyes to Kalni. _Not in front of people._

Kalni watched all of this with amused interest. “Send your kute to be repaired. Does your Tribe have a tailor?” she asked Teryn.

Teryn shook her head. “...no… we mostly handle things on our own.”

“Hmm, well. If people need help with bigger jobs, send ‘em over. Or if they just need supplies. We’ve got plenty.” Kalni patted her scissors. “I assume you’d rather keep your kid home tonight?”

Teryn nodded.

“I’ll make sure she gets sent home for dinner. Who knows, your wolf cub could help calm my triangle down.” Kalni inclined her head to them both. “Nice to chat with you, Kurs’buir.” She grinned. “Kurs’buire, I guess. Good luck!”

Cuan waited until she was gone before snaking his arm around Teryn’s waist and pressing his forehead to the side of her head. “Good morning. Well, noon, almost.” She reached up to cup his cheek, stroking lightly. He rumbled. “Were you able to sleep more?”

“Some.” She nodded. “My ori’vod will be here soon. He wanted me to meet him here.”

Cuan frowned. “That sounds…” Ominous.

“Yeah.” She raised an eyebrow at his armor bag. “All fixed?”

He nodded. “I’ll go and get changed. We should be hearing from Solde about the Taris people soon.” He kissed her hair and gave her another squeeze. “I’ll keep an eye on Kurs’ika, too.”

“She’s with the other kids, she seems to be fitting in.” She said softly.

“Doesn’t take them long to worm their way in, does it?” To the fabric of the covert, or into the lives of the people who chose to love them.

“No. Not long at all.” She smiled as Cuan nuzzled her hair again, then set off for home.

Solde stood at watchful ease at the rendezvous point. Edeemir was sitting quietly next to Daui, ears twitching at every sound, but relaxed. Two warriors were set up as snipers above the meeting point and if anything about the approach of the other ship seemed fishy at all, they would high tail it out, strafing as they went.

Daui sat, attempting to be patient and good, but they had clearly picked up on the tension from the warriors. They kept one hand on Edeemir and the other was twitching anxiously.

“Incoming,” one of the scouts said on the private comm and Solde clapped a gentle hand on Daui’s shoulder. They looked up, eyes wide and anxious. So much had happened over the past week; daring to hope that this would be their tribe, their family, their parents seemed dangerous.

Solde nodded down. “It’s okay to hope, ad’ika.”

“My buir said once that there was bravery in hope,” Daui said quietly, fisting one hand in Edeemir’s scruff.

“Your buir is right. I hope this is your family. Not,” Solde hastened to add, “that we wouldn’t be pleased to welcome you into our tribe; you all would have a home with us. But it would be better for everyone to be reunited. Family is important and I’m certain your buire are terrified for you.”

Daui nodded, then turned their eyes to the horizon as a ship entered view. They stood up, squinting. At the roar of the engines, Edeemir surged to his feet and gave a joyful peal of barks. “It’s their ship!”

Solde let out a long held breath. Just because it was their ship didn’t mean it was the Taris tribe, necessarily, but it was a step in the right direction. The ship landed, and everyone held their breath. Both snipers reported that they had good sightlines and waited for orders. Solde had a hand on her blaster and the ruus’alor was on the other side of Daui and Edeemir, rifle ready to go.

Edeemir wiggled while the hatch opened and once someone was spotted coming down the ramp, he leapt forward, barking ecstatically. Daui squinted and wailed, “FERALIA!” and charged after the strill.

Solde let out a half laugh, half cry. “I think that’s them.”

Feralia swooped Daui up into a hug, starting to cry a little. Another person came down the ramp and Daui hurled themselves into his arms. Feralia gave a shaky smile, then turned to Solde and the ruus’alor. Edeemir ran into the ship, still barking madly.

Solde watched Feralia come towards them. She had no armor and no helmet, but wore a kar’ta beskar around her neck. Solde muttered on a private channel to the ruus’alor, “Civilians?”

“Must be.”

Feralia approached Solde with her hands open- no weapons. Solde gave a nod and Feralia looked into the ship. “Where are the others?” She asked in Basic.

“In our Covert. We needed…” Solde answered in the same language. She wasn’t sure if the other woman even realized that she had spoken Basic.

“...to be sure. Understandable. Thank you. ” Feralia let out a breath. “...where were they?”

Solde took a breath. “They were kidnapped by traffickers. We happened to find them and brought them home with us.”

“Are they all okay? What about our warriors?”

Solde paused, just long enough for Feralia to realize she needed to steel herself. “The warriors were killed in the ambush that stole your children…. And one of the children, I’m so sorry, but he was killed in the battle.”

Feralia felt her heart skip a beat as the translation from Basic into Mando’a ran through her head, then back to what Solde had said. He. He. Not her daughter. One of their other precious children, but not hers. She felt terrible at the bubble of relief she felt. Absolutely terrible. But Kurshi was waiting for her. She could manage the rest. “How do we get to your Covert?”

“We’ll have one of our pilots fly you.” Solde glanced behind her as a man approached from the Taris ship. Lanky, with a short beard.

“Grey,” Feralia said, reaching out to take his arm.

“Where are the rest of them? Where’s our kids?” He spoke in Mando’a, and Solde briefly wondered if Feralia even spoke Mando’a.

Feralia gave him a shaky smile. “They needed to make sure that this wasn’t a trap- the rest of the kids are safe in their Covert. They’ll bring us,” she replied in Mando’a.

Grey nodded. “They’re okay?”

Feralia hesitated a split second. “Yes.”

“Thank the stars.” He closed his eyes and one hand clutched the kar’ta beskar around his neck. “Can we go now?”

Solde nodded. There was no good way to break the news but Feralia knew her people. This was her decision. “The scouts are on their way in. Then we can go.”

The journey to Maldo Kreis was long and predictably dull. Kata had a nap then took her turn at the watch while Ordo took his own. She heated up some food while he was napping and frowned at the meat-heavy options. With a shrug she took a vegetable curry and ate it, flopped across the pilot's seat.

The Talon was, for a ship that had been in the charge of a coward and traitor, in good shape. Kata had heard some of the things about the history of the Nevarro people, but there were many holes. She had put together that the situation of the al’baar’ur was related to the coward and traitor, but she hadn’t quite put together how. She’d seen Ordo working on it in their shipyard and had made a note of how conscientious he had been about making sure everything was clean and working properly.

She did like that in a man.

Kata zoned out, watching the lights of hyperspace dance across the windscreen. She eventually snapped back to awareness when she heard Ordo rummaging around in the galley but stayed where she was. If he wanted to eat, he’d need privacy to do it, and it was only polite to give him the space.

After he’d eaten and cleaned up, he came back into the cockpit and checked the readings. “Still on course?” He’d made enough of a racket- deliberately so- so she could put her helmet back on before he got there.

“Yup.” She had put on her helmet, of course. While it might be reasonably standard for the Samaki people to go without helmets at home (and most people did consider their ships to be an extension of home, as long as no one else was on them) this was not a Samaki ship and the last thing she wanted to do was make Ordo uncomfortable.

He sat down and they sat in an awkward silence, until Kata finally asked, “The… I don’t know her name, the al’baar’ur? She said you had Foundlings?”

Ordo chuckled. “Two. My oldest is twelve, thinks she knows everything. The younger is eleven- they have the same name day, which makes it easier. Anyway, he likes fixing things.”

Kata grinned. “I imagine that’s come in handy once or twice. I think I saw him helping you a few times.”

Ordo scuffed his toe. “You saw?”

Kata flushed beneath her helmet. “Well, you were in the salvage area, and... he walks kind of like you, did you know?” Long strides, gliding.

“His sister has mentioned it once or twice.” He chuckled to himself.

“How were they found?”

“We found the pair of them wandering the bazaar on Nevarro about seven years ago. Freezing, starving. They’d been abandoned by their family. I think, based on what they were wearing, they were well-off at some point, then they weren’t, and then they were just… two extra mouths to feed.” Ordo sighed to himself. Two extra mouths, but they were as precious to him as the sun and the stars and he’d do anything for them.

“They didn’t know?”

“The youngest was too young to really know. And my oldest… she protected him as much as she could during that time. I think she remembered more than she ever let on but once she was sure they were safe…” He shrugged. “She’s a good kid. They both are.”

“They sound like it.”

“How about you? Any Foundlings- um, ade?”

“No, no. I’m usually in and out so much it didn’t seem fair, not without someone else that could… co-parent…” she trailed off. Stars, did that sound leading.

“Were you a Foundling?”

“No, I was born on Mandalore. My buir was a Foundling… sort of. She was orphaned during the Civil War as a baby and was milk-vod to Cuan’s buir until she was adopted by one of their cousins.” Kata grinned as Ordo turned to look at her, frowning confusion writ all across his visor. “Clan Lytau is a complicated mess. But that makes me a cousin… of some kind... to Cuan. And to your al’baar’ur, once they say the vows.”

Ordo nodded slowly, thinking. “She’s part of the beroya’s clan and we were all brought up on Concordia... “ he tilted his head. “Was Clan Lytau part of the New Mandalorians?”

“Not officially. None of our leaders agreed with the Pacifist stance but they didn’t want to go into exile, either. They tried to work with Satine’s government to get her to be less… militant, but, well.” Kata shrugged. “Things happened.”

“They certainly did.”

Kata wiggled her foot. It was starting to swell and sting a little. “How about you?”

“Oh, Foundling. Definitely Foundling. Like most of our generation, my birth family were wartime casualties.” He huffed a bit. “My original finder didn’t want to take me, but…” he chuckled a bit. “My buir said all children were precious.”

“Why? Why didn’t your Finder…?”

“Mmm, he had his reasons....” he trailed off.

“...I see.” She didn’t, not at all, but before she could question further, she groaned as a sharp stabbing pain went up her leg. “Shit.”

Ordo jumped to his feet. “What do you need?”

“Need to change the bandages. The al’baar’ur gave me some stuff…” Ordo took off for the medkits before she could finish the thought. She started working off her leg armor and was about to grit her teeth to take off her boot when he came back.

“No, no, let me.” He knelt down in front of her and carefully worked her boot off. It wasn’t her usual boots; she’d gotten a larger pair for the bandages, but her foot had swelled up. He tsked, shaking his head slightly. “I bet she’d say you’ve been walking on this too much.”

Kata shrugged, then hissed as he carefully cut the bandages off. It was healing, it really was, but there was a stage of blaster burns where “better” looked an awful lot like “a lot worse.”

Ordo nodded, and found a numbing spray in the bag. “This first?” Kata nodded and relaxed as the numbing started to take immediate effect. She closed her eyes as he pulled off his gloves to apply some antibacterial cream, then started to rewrap everything. “Am I doing this right?”

She looked down, and yes, the bandages were wrapped correctly…. By dark orange hands. She blinked a few times, then looked at his helmet. The crown was raised up a little, just a bit more than was normal for a human head and there were small horned shapes along the top. “Uh…. I’m... sorry.”

“Oh, yes.” Ordo smiled. “I guess it’s not… completely obvious if you didn’t know.” He nodded. “Yes. Zabrak.”

“Oh.” Kata blinked again, then said the first thing that came to her mind. “I’m a vegetarian.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The idea of a milk-sibling is that if a baby doesn't have access to breastmilk (for whatever reason), another mother can provide. I'm thinking that this was the easiest solution during wartime when supply lines might be compromised. 
> 
> Zabraks, of course, are carnivores. 
> 
> Mando'a Translations
> 
> Buir: parent  
> beroya: bounty hunter  
> al'verde: Commander  
> vod'ad: sibling's child  
> ori'vod: older sibling  
> Kurs'ika: wolf cub  
> ad'ika: child  
> kute: undergear  
> Kurs'buire: wolf-parents  
> ruus'alor: sergeant  
> al'baar'ur: doctor  
> ade: children


	45. If we lay a strong enough foundation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Parents and children and families and importance of cats.

Vha had taken to slipping out to the small garden in the late afternoons. Usually at that time, most people were heading for dinner, wrapping up their days, and no one would be around. No one expected anything of her and mostly left her alone. The al’baar’ur came by every day and Faris would be with her every minute he wasn’t in training or doing his expected duties.

Once the little girl Vha had helped escape came by without her buir. Both of them felt so awkward that they sat in silence until the little girl said, “My bu has a loth cat.”

“Oh?”

“His name is Atin. She said he was a runt.”

“Oh.” Vha nodded. “Is he nice?”

“He isn’t….not nice.” Lypatri thought about it for a minute. “I’m not sure he likes me yet. She says he will, but… he likes her best and my ba’vodu’ad second best.”

“What about your other buir?”

“I think he tolerates him.” Lypatri shrugged.

“Do you like them? Your buire?”

Lypatri nodded solemnly. “They’re nice. They ask me what I did during the day and tell me things.”

“That’s a good start.” Vha smiled wistfully.

“Do you have a buir?”

“I did.” Vha glanced at the sky, where the sun was dipping below the edge of the valley. “You should get home for dinner.”

Lypatri hopped down and trotted off with a wave. Vha smiled a bit as she watched the child go. Lypatri was small for her age, with short legs, and both of her buire were tall with long, ground covering strides. Teryn always walked quickly, like she had no time to waste. Cuan tended to lope along but was deceptively fast. Lypatri had quickly developed a quick trot in order to keep up with them. She generally trotted wherever she went, even when clamoring about with Upio.

Vha smiled faintly, remembering when she had to work at being fast enough to keep up with Vayez. His constant refrain those first few years had been “No, vod’ika, you CAN’T COME” but she followed him everywhere anyway. He was her ori’vod and she adored him.

At some point, she knew she would need to figure out what she was going to do with the rest of her life. Now that she had a rest of her life. But the thought was too big for her to even figure out how to approach it. Rest and heal, the al’baar’ur said. She could do that. She had Faris at least. That wasn’t nothing.

She quietly admitted in the deepest part of where her soul had been that she missed her buir. Dreadfully.

Faris had kept her apprised of the goings-on around the covert. How many of the children were being taken back to Corellia, how they hoped that they found the Tribe of the Mando’ade. How the beroya left with no notice. How Kreez was working on planning the wedding feast and how it had again devolved into a competition with the other skraan’ur.

Vha had nodded politely but was mostly only interested in reuniting the children with their people. They hadn’t even been there when she sent Lypatri out with a prayer made of beskar but she felt that if she could help them find their way to their home, then she could be content. Then she could -maybe- close this chapter of her life.

Teryn checked on Vha while she was waiting for Din. She had noticed that Vha was spending more time outside in the fresh air and the sunshine. “I found some books. I don’t know what your preferred genre is, but… they’re light. Happy endings only.”

Vha took them, glancing at the titles. “What helped you? ...after?”

Teryn sat down. “I joined the Alliance. War kept me busy.” She smiled faintly as Atin hopped up on a rock and trilled at them both. “And him. He helped a lot.” Atin had more than helped. Atin was the reason she’d truly laughed for the first time in over six years. She’d lavished all the love she had on her runt of a loth cat kitten in the years when she’d had the time to breathe that there hadn’t been during the war.

It was perhaps a lot to put on the back of one loth cat. But Atin was as stubborn and tenacious as his name implied. He accepted all the love and returned it; the only being in the galaxy who’d loved her without hesitation or condition. If she’d left him behind when Din had come all those months ago, she honestly wasn’t sure she could have made it through.

Vha nodded slowly. “It’s weird.” Being back, being around her people, seeing the world with her own eyes and nothing else.

“It is. And it’s hard. Sometimes it’ll be easier. Sometimes it’ll be harder.” Teryn glanced up at the sound of a ship approaching. “But the only way out is through.” She gave Vha a smile and headed for where Din would land, Atin following. Everything having to do with Vha was hard. Maybe they could find her a loth cat or something. Something to love.

Teryn started running as she heard the Razor Crest preparing to land. The engines sounded terrible- she should tell him to have someone who knew what the fuck they were doing take a look at them. Too bad Kata was off with Ordo.

She pulled herself to a halt near the entrance as the side hatch lowered, putting a hand on the wall for extra support. She let out a breath as Din came down the hatch carrying Zake, Jha’iil toddling behind him. Atin skidded to a halt in front of Jha’iil and sniffed him, then began to lick his head all over. Jha’iil giggled.

Teryn closed her eyes and consciously set aside her emotions and let her clinical brain take over. “What happened?” She pulled a hover stretcher towards him and he set Zake down on it gently. So gently. Teryn started a scan. Zake looked pale and ashen beneath her dark blue skin, clammy and unconscious.

“She was attacked by people looking for us. They pulled on one of her lekku.” He set a hand on Zake’s shoulder, stroking her gently. His other hand was clenched into a fist at his side. “There was bruising but it didn’t start to swell like this until a few hours ago.”

“How long ago?” She carefully pulled off the gold flecked scarf and let out a hiss at the obvious swelling. Din grimaced. It had definitely gotten worse.

“Around the time I left.” Din thought about it. Time tended to get squishy when he was in space. “48 hours ago?” Jha’iil put a hand on Din’s boot and Din automatically picked him up. Jha’iil trilled worriedly. Din patted him absently.

Teryn nodded, frowning at the readings. “How many times did you take off and land?” She began to push the stretcher into the trauma room, thinking rapidly. “More than twice?”

“Um… twice for each.” Din followed. “I didn’t restock, so we didn’t have anything…” Inside the trauma room, Teryn set the stretcher in the middle and placed the scanner she had been using on a table without looking. Everything was where she expected it to be. Din felt some of the tension in his chest release as he watched his vod’ika’s confident and efficient movements.

Teryn nodded, very carefully feeling the swelling around the base of the injured lek. “I need a more in depth scan to be sure, but I think there’s a tear in the nerve sheath and fluid is leaking.”

“Can you fix it?”

Teryn looked up at him with raised eyebrows. “If that’s what’s wrong, yes. If it’s something else… probably yes.” She nodded at the door. “Out.”

“I’ll stay.”

“The hell you will. Get out, get some food. I’ll find you when I’m done.” Teryn pulled another scanner over, then turned a glare on Din when he hesitated. “This is why you brought her here instead of anywhere else. GET OUT.”

Jha’iil made a worried coo at her tone, ears low. Din sighed and with one last lingering look at Zake, stepped out into the hall. He leaned against the wall, exhausted, worried. So worried. Jha’iil made soft coo as he patted Din’s helmet. Din smiled down at his kid. “Jate, ad’ika. You did so good.” Jha’iil smiled, proud of himself, then wrapped his little arms around Din’s neck and squeezed as hard as he could. Din patted him on the back, letting out a deep breath.

“Kai'tome?”

Din let out a small laugh. “Yes, let's get you some food and move the Razor Crest.” He could do that. He could go through the motions. His vod’ika was right. She didn’t need him hanging around, watching her every move. He had things he could do while Teryn did her job.

“MANDO.”

Like talk to Cara. Jha’iil made a happy sound and caroled “CA-A.” Din turned to face Cara, striding towards him with aggression.

“Hi.”

“What the fuck, Mando.” Cara stopped in front of him and glared. With a sigh, he put Jha’iil down on the ground and gestured for him to step back. Frowning, Jha’iil did. Cara slammed her fist into Din’s midsection. Jha’iil made a distressed squawk.

Din nodded. “I deserved that.” He looked down at Jha’ill. “I’m fine.”

“Yes, he is,” Cara said to the kid. “And yes, you did! How could you run off like that without a word to me?” She shook her head. “I was worried! You could have used help! You could have….” she stopped and looked around. “Where is she?”

Din nodded to the medbay. “She was… someone traced the ship back to Dantooine. They found her and…”

“Is she…” Cara trailed off. Of course Zake wasn’t okay. That’s why he landed near the medbay. “How bad is it?”

“It’s not good. She’s been in and out of consciousness for the past couple hours.”

“Can T…?”

“I brought her here because I needed someone I could trust.” Din looked at the medbay door again. “I need to…” he sighed. “I need to check in with alor.”

“Yeah, you do. Everyone is on alert, worried someone will trace us here.” Cara glanced around. “I’m almost surprised they let you land.”

“They knew I was coming.” Din picked up Jha’iil again and headed into the Crest, Cara following. Put the ship in the yard. Get some food. Talk to the Armorer. Maybe even take a quick shower if there was time for it. Teryn could find him if she needed to. He needed to give her the space to do her job.

He could do that. He gave the medbay one last, lingering look and sighed. He could do that.

Kata and Ordo had idly chatted through most of the rest of the trip to Maldo Kreis. Safe topics. Ordo’s Foundlings. Kata’s salvaging abilities. The difference and similarities between hunting bounties and hunting out trash that could be made into credits. Providing for their Tribes.

They danced away from anything too deep. But it was comfortable, just talking.

They’d hit one of those pauses in the conversation where things were either going to turn intimate or awkward, where they were both just looking at each other, when they dropped out of hyperspace. They both quickly turned their attention to the controls.

“We want to make this as quick as possible…” Ordo muttered, scanning the surface. “If we can toss it into a ravinak’s mouth, so much the better.”

“That’ll fuck them up,” Kata nodded. “That’ll fuck ‘em up good.”

Ordo smiled. She was tiny and fierce and bloodthirsty. “I’m told they tend to hang out underneath the shipyards. The beroya told me they gather where people empty out their gray tubes and, well... “ he glanced over at Kata.

“We empty our shit tank, wait for one to show up, toss the chip in its mouth, and book it?”

“Pretty much.” He tilted his head in an unmistakable grin. “What could go wrong?”

Vha stayed out in the garden. Tabor had come by to keep her appraised of the plans in case they needed to evacuate but for the moment, she wanted to stay outside. Besides, she didn’t have anything that needed to be moved.

The sun was nice. She’d flipped through the books and the al’baar’ur was right, they were all light and fluffy. A happy ending sounded nice. Everything else was so uncertain, the idea of having something guaranteed to end well was comforting. She picked one and started reading.

She wasn’t sure how long she’d been reading before something made her stop and look up. Her bu- no, _the al’verde_ was at the edge of the garden. She stared at him, anxiety rising up in her throat. He stared back, then gestured to one of the other benches with a sigh. “May I sit?”

She shrugged, shrinking back, eyes flicking around for an escape.

“Ad’ika…” He stopped, not sure what he was going to say. There was too much and he didn’t know where to start.

She shook her head. “You don’t have to call me that,” she whispered. “I know I failed you, al’verde.”

“No…” Is it different when it’s your own kid?

She shook her head again, her voice started to quaver. “I remember what you said about the al’baar’ur. I remember you said she was a faithless coward. I remember what you said about others, that they should have… fought harder.” She’d had months to think about all the ways she’d failed, and then days with nothing but time to think about how ashamed her buir clearly was of her. Days.

“I-”

“You trained me to be strong and to fight and I… I didn’t. Not enough.”

“Ad’ika.... Cyar’ika…”

“I know you’d rather I was dead than… dishonored, disgraced.” She took a deep breath. “I know you’re ashamed of me. I know.”

“No…”

“I know what you think of people who lost their helmets. You _never_ hid that from us.” She choked back a sound- a laugh or a sob, she couldn’t tell. “When I thought… when he told me you were dead I thought that at least.... You didn’t live to know about this.” _Gideon took even that from me._

She shakily stood up. “Ni ceta, al’verde. I failed you, I failed my vode, I failed the Tribe, and I failed the Way of the Mandalore. I don’t know what I will do when I’m able to... leave, but I will not stay and force you to look on my shame.” She picked up the books and made her way inside.

Paz stared after her. He hadn’t been sure what he was going to say, other than he was relieved to see that she had survived, and that he was proud of her for having survived. That he didn’t know what they were going to do, but they’d do something. Surely the Samaki Tribe would let her stay. They let the al’baar’ur stay, didn’t they?

He hadn’t realized quite how… vocal he might have been while his children were growing up. The time right after the Purge had been so fraught, so precarious. Trying to hold together the Tribe had taken so much. He’d been so angry at the people who’d chosen to abandon them, the people who’d been too weak to hold on. But they’d internalized it all.

Every bit of it.

Feralia watched the shifting stars out the porthole of the Taris ship. She knew very well that taking the time to make sure they weren’t traced, that any sentries knew who they were, that all of these things were important to the safety of the Covert and by extension their own children. But she wanted to have Kurshi in her arms as soon as possible. Sooner.

Grey came over, glancing behind him in the cockpit where two of the warriors from the Samaki tribe were piloting. They hadn’t allowed him to even see where they were going. He had no idea where these people had taken them or when they’d be allowed to leave. “You trust them?”

“What choice do we have?”

“How do we know they are who they say they are?” He kept his voice low. The rest of their Tribe was anxious, excited, and a few were nervous. Daui’s buir hadn’t let the child out of his arms since they’d leapt into them. Edeemir kept circling around from person to person, sniffing and whining. “Maybe they’re not even really Mandalorians.”

Grey gave Edeemir an absent pat. The strill lunged up and licked his ear, whining. “What’s wrong with you? Go bother someone else.” He gave Edeemir a shove away. Edeemir whimpered again and curled up next to his feet.

Feralia looked down at the strill, then up at him. “Daui said they were. They said the kids were safe. They had Edeemir.”

“Why didn’t one of our warriors come with them? Why bring one of the kids?”

“I don’t know.” Feralia looked out the porthole again at a green planet below.

Grey eyed her narrowly. “You’re a terrible liar.”

“All I know is what they told me.” Feralia said, still looking at the planet.

Grey sighed. His brother had been trained as a warrior while he had learned to fly. Sure, there was a certain amount of glory in being a warrior- they were Mandalorians, after all, but the freedom of the stars couldn’t be matched. He, along with most of the rest of the Tribe, had been uneasy with the decision to leave the children behind. But he’d been their pilot. It was his ship. And what the alor said went, so he took his people away, feeling like it was the worst thing he could have done.

It had been a long few months with only the occasional communication. They’d made credits. The last message they had from their alor was that he’d heard of a guy who might know where to find other Mandalorians. Then everything went silent.

“Do you think he’s dead?”

Feralia jerked and looked at him, startled. “Who?”

“Alor.” Grey sighed. “He’s either dead or he abandoned us.”

“He wouldn’t abandon us.” Feralia whispered. “He was stupid. He made a stupid decision. But he wouldn’t… he must be dead.”

“What are we going to do once we have them?”

She shrugged. “Hopefully they’ll let us stay for a few days and we can discuss our options.” She huffed back a laugh. “Maybe they’ll let us join them, just like alor planned.”

The ship shuddered as it hit the atmosphere and Grey’s nostrils flared. “They need to ease up on the dampers.”

Feralia nodded absently. There was what appeared to be a valley in the mountain range but it looked empty. The ship circled around and started to land. She looked at Grey, anxious and excited. “Looks like we’re here.”

He nodded. The rest of the tribe waited until the ship landed- a little harder than Grey would have set her down. Once the hatch opened they all slowly made their way out, looking around. Solde was waiting.

“....none of this was visible from the air.” Grey said, frowning.

Solde pulled off her helmet and grinned. “Nah, we have that covered.” She nodded off to the side. “They’re over there.”

Feralia looked, and there were a pile of children running towards them, including one sturdy girl with a riot of fluffy curls. “BU BU BU!” Feralia swept the girl up in her arms, starting to cry in earnest. It had been two months since she’d seen her child and several days of not knowing where she was, if she was safe. Now her beloved Kurshi was in her arms, safe, loved, and she was never going to let her go.

Around her, the rest of the children found their buire and joyful reunions were happening all over. Except…

Grey looked, frowning. Where were the warriors? Where was his brother?

...where was Rauff? Where was his vod’ad?

“Feralia….” He whispered. She stood up, Kurshi’s arms wrapped around her neck. “....what weren’t you saying?”

She swallowed. “I didn’t know which one it was.” She put a hand on his arm. “I’m sorry. I’m so…”

“No.” He shook his head. “No.”

“I’m sorry.” She turned to face a pair of warriors coming their way. One woman in dark red armor, carrying her helmet, and other with a cape of fur and night owl shaped helmet. She and Grey exchanged a quick look.

“I am Rima Mairn, of Clan Lytau, one of the Alor here. This,” she nodded to the other woman, “Is the other. Olarom.” She gave a kind smile and the other alor nodded.

Ferlaia nodded back. “Feralia Styr. I’m… well… we don’t really have an alor at the moment but… I’m close enough for now, I guess.” She rubbed Kurshi’s back. “Thank you for finding them. And us. Thank you, we can’t…” she realized she was babbling, and moreover, she was babbling in Basic. “Vor entye.”

“Where is my brother?” Grey snapped, harsher than he intended.

Rima and the Armorer exchanged glances. “Was your brother one of your warriors?”

Grey nodded slowly. He hadn’t missed the past tense.

Rima nodded. “What we have been able to piece together is that your warriors were killed by the mercenaries that tried to take your children for trafficking. They were brought back here when my people left the message for you. Along with the strill.”

Grey closed his eyes and took several deep breaths. “There’s a child missing. My vod’ad.”

The other alor nodded. “He was… he was killed during the rescue mission.” She tilted her head in sympathy. “Solde will take you to them. We held off on honoring them in hopes that we would find their people.” Solde nodded as she clipped her helmet to her belt.

She led him towards the far end of the medbay. Grey staggered as he followed. Solde paused at the entrance and looked at him sympathetically. “I found them and brought them here, along with the strill. He protected them, as best he could.”

Grey nodded, staring at the door. “Were you… were you with the rescue?”

“No.”

“How did…. Rauff. How did he…”

Solde sighed. “I believe he tried to charge at his captors when we got him freed and they just…” she put a hand on his arm and he flung it away. “I’m so sorry.” She opened the door, so they could both see the shrouded bodies inside. The light was still burning. “I’ll give you some time.”

Solde stepped back and went towards her ship. She glanced back to see Grey straighten his back, set his shoulders, and go inside.

Teryn nodded to herself. Yes, this was exactly what she thought. It was relatively simple- set in a shunt to drain the fluid, repair the tear. Check that the pressure changes from landing and taking off hadn’t ruptured anything else. Poor Zake. The pain must have been awful. While there was a chance there was damage she couldn’t detect until Zake woke up, Teryn was feeling cautiously optimistic.

It was funny, Teryn thought. Eleven years before she would have been flying blind on this. She didn’t really learn how to deal with head injuries until she joined the Alliance. Now? She’d learned a whole host of other things in her time away. There were many people whose lives she had saved. Hundreds, possibly.

That wasn’t _nothing_ , she supposed.

Without the scarf, she was able to see the scars on Zake’s lekku. Almost like brands, but brands that had been carved in multiple times over years. Zake had been right; she did know about scars you wanted to keep hidden from prying eyes. Teryn shuddered. Lekku carried extremely sensitive nerves- it was intended as torture and it left scars that were hard to hide.

Once she was done with the injured lek, had it properly bandaged and was sure it was draining properly, she checked over any other injuries Zake might have acquired. It was tricky, since Zake couldn’t consent, but one of the realities of combat medicine is sometimes you had to do the best with what you had and if someone wasn’t able to tell you about injuries, they could spiral out of control quickly.

There was the old injury Zake had mentioned in her hip, Teryn nodded to herself. There were a few things they could try to make that easier to handle. Her feet had clearly taken a pounding but all in all, weren’t too bad. Well, Teryn amended. Weren’t too bad for a dancer’s feet. She cleaned the scrapes and covered them with her bruise salve. She eyed the old boots. They were Din’s, she was certain. They could certainly find Zake some better fitting shoes.

She covered Zake with a blanket and set up the monitor and a call button. She needed to let Din know that Zake was stable, that things were okay. She needed to check on the evacuation supplies, she needed to find out where Tabor was.

She admitted that while it would have been useful to have Tabor’s hands, it was nice to not have to explain everything and just do what was needed. Teaching was rewarding, it was the only way he was going to learn, but sometimes it was just tiring.

Out in the hall, she glanced down towards Vha’s room to see Vha stagger against the door before going inside. Inside the room, Vha curled up on the bed, clutching the stuffed strill to her chest, staring into space. “What happened?”

“Nothing. It doesn’t matter. Leave me alone.”

Teryn’s face turned furious as she shut the door and looked out the door at the end of the hall, where she could see Paz out in the garden. She stalked out to him. “What the ever loving fuck.”

Paz jerked out of whatever trance he was in and stared at her. “Not now.”

“Then when? What did you say to her?”

“Nothing. I didn’t say anything to her.” He sounded defeated.

Teryn shook her head in disgust. “Of course you didn’t.” She paced in front of him, scowling. “I know what you said to my face, I can only imagine what you said in front of them. Fuck’s sake, both of us, _both of us_ suffered to protect your sorry ass and all you can say is _nothing_.”

“This isn’t about you.”

“No,” Teryn admitted. “No, it’s not. But whatever you said about me now applies to her. And you… if this were my kid I’d be so overjoyed at having her back she’d never leave my sight again.” She shook her head, mouth twisted in disgust. “She’s been through a hell that none of us can imagine, believing you were dead. Then she gets out of it and the first thing she sees is your back? This isn’t about you, either.”

“She said she was going to leave-”

“That isn’t a solution!” Teryn snapped. “Rejection by her family for something that wasn’t her fault isn’t-” She broke off as the monitor in Zake’s room went off. “We are not done.” She turned on her heel and stalked down to the trauma room.

Inside, Zake was stirring. Teryn wrinkled her nose. It was a little earlier than she’d expected but, she admitted, it had been a while since she’d had to account for Twi'lek physiology. She adjusted the fluids and smiled as Zake opened her eyes.

“How do you feel?”

“...where…?” Zake frowned, confused and scared.

“You’re safe.” Teryn was about to say she would call for Din when Tabor burst in. Teryn frowned at him, just as the triple alert tone that was the signal for a strange ship approaching.

“...shit.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mando'a translations
> 
> Al'baar'ur: Doctor  
> Buir: Parent  
> ba'vodu'ad: cousin  
> ori'vod: older sibling  
> Beroya: bounty hunter  
> Skraan'ur: cook  
> vod'ika: younger sibling  
> jate: Good  
> ad'ika: little one, kid  
> Kai'tome: food  
> Alor: chief  
> al'verde: commander  
> Cyar'ika: sweetheart  
> Ni ceta: sorry (lit: I kneel) grovelling apology - rare  
> Vode: comrades, siblings  
> vod'ad: sibling's child  
> Olarom: Welcome  
> Vor entye: thank you (Lit: I accept a debt)


	46. Take all the children where the flood water's low

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happens when a strange ship lands in the middle of a covert of Mandos? 
> 
> Exactly what you'd expect.

Ordo angled the ship down to the surface, looking for an area where a lot of people appeared to have emptied their tanks. The weather on Maldo Kreis was never good and there was a storm brewing. Ordo frowned at the readings and made a disgruntled noise.

“What?”

“We don’t have a lot of time before this storm is impossible to fly in.” He snorted in frustration. “Hope they’re hungry.”

Kata pulled the small beskar box out of her belt and looked down at it. “I should fly. You should take this.”

Ordo looked at her, then down at her foot. She was right and they both knew it. There was a level of mobility they’d really need to give them the greatest chance of success and she didn’t currently have it. Not really. He nodded. “Take ‘em.”

“Sadet said to save the beskar!” she called after him. He waved in acknowledgement and she turned her attention to flying, The winds were rough but the Talon was holding its own. She squinted through the readings. “Found an open spot in the ice!”

“Any ravinaks nearby?”

“Can’t tell. Wind’s blowing too much snow around.” Kata frowned at the scanners. “We should dump the shit and hope one bites.”

“Just not me!”

“Ideally, no.” Kata frowned down at the controls. “Where’s the evac tube dump out?”

She got the Talon hovering over an open spot in the water and opened the side hatch. Ordo hooked himself to ship with safety lines and looked down into the swirling ice and snow. “Hold her steady!”

Kata gritted her teeth and held the ship as steady as she could. She didn’t normally fly in such conditions, not by choice. “HURRY.”

Ordo looked down, scanning for any movement. Getting the timing right would be tricky. He didn’t want to open the box until the last possible second, in case the tracking ping did alert someone nearby, but he also needed at least a handful of seconds. He hissed in satisfaction as his scanner caught a movement underneath the ice. “Empty the gray hold!”

The Talon’s gray hold was nearly full, courtesy of the pile of children they had rescued. It was, in a word, disgusting. Not for the first time, Ordo was thankful for the filters in his helmet and, not for the first time, he wondered how aruetiise even managed when they had to smell everything all the time. A sharp gust of wind buffeted the ship just as Kata opened the hatch and while a lot of the slop ended up in the hole, a fair amount blew away on the ice. Ordo’s attention flickered to it, then snapped back to the hole in the ice as a gaping maw lunged out. “FUCK! UP UP UP!” The ship lurched up and Ordo fell back on his ass.

“Did you get it out?”

“Not yet! Stay here!”

Kata swore. Even the few meters she’d brought them up made the winds stronger. “Hurry up! I can’t hold it much longer!”

Ordo methodically yanked at the beskar box. Sadet had made it so it sealed tightly, to prevent it opening accidentally. While Ordo understood that reasoning, it wasn’t helping him at the moment. “Come on, come on…. Yes!” He got the box open, picked up the chip between two fingers, and looked down at the ice. The snow was getting heavier, but he was pretty sure he saw something moving, down in the depths. “Can you go lower?”

“LOWER? Are you…. Fuck. Hold on.”

The ship jolted down several meters and Ordo waited, holding his breath. “Look at how tasty we are, come on….” Sure enough, the ravinak lunged out of the ice again and Ordo let out half his breath. With a flick of his wrist, he sent the chip towards the monster’s mouth. It landed on the creature’s nose. Close enough. “UP UP UP.”

Kata yanked on the controls and the Talon lurched into the air. Ordo fell against the opening and grunted as his feet slipped out from under him. The ship tilted from side to side as Kata struggled to get it under control and pull them out above the weather. He managed to get a grip on one of the hand holds and held on grimly. If he could just manage until she got them above the storm….

 _Fucking weather,_ Kata thought grimly. Of course this had to happen during Maldo Kreis’ stormy season. “Who the fuck are you kidding, girl. There’s only a stormy season here.”

The proximity alert went off. Kata swore again. “There’s a ship coming towards us. Are you in?” The only response was a series of curses, only some of which were in a language Kata could understand. She flicked her eyes to the monitor that showed her what was happening in the hold and all she could see of Ordo was his hand holding on to one of the grips. “Fuckin….” She couldn’t get down there to help him, not with the weather and the approaching ship.

She could, however, use physics. She banked the ship sharply so he fell into the hold. She let out a short sigh of relief as she saw him tumble in and then get pulled up abruptly by the safety line. Good. Shut the door. Head up. And up.

Once the Talon cleared the clouds, it was easier to keep her level - but the other ship was following them. Kata growled. Evasive maneuvers would take too much time. No, instead she’d charge at them head on. She opened the gun ports, whipped the Talon around, and accelerated towards the other ship.

It didn’t appear to be any sort of official ship but it was hard to tell these days. The other ship charged at the Talon and Kata grinned. “I ain’t fuckin’ bluffing, di’kut.” She fired a single shot over the other ship’s viewscreen, then gunned the engines. The other ship immediately broke away and charged down into the clouds.

Kata resisted the urge to chase them- they’d performed their duties and staying around to fuck with these assholes, while satisfying, would give Gideon’s people more time to find them and possibly chase them home. With a regretful grumble of annoyance, she turned the Talon back up to the black.

“You okay down there?”

There was no answer. She gritted her teeth and methodically set the course away from Maldo Kreis. She needed to get the ship to a point where they could safely enter hyperspace. She needed to do her job and only then could she get down to see how badly he was hurt. Methodically, she gunned the sublight engines and kept an eye on the rear scanners. Something was coming up from the planet behind them, multiple ships it looked like, but the Talon was fast and she had a decent head start.

A few half-hearted shots came from the ships behind her. She scowled- one of those ships was closing faster than expected. Thinking quickly, she hit the coordinates for a planet in a different direction than Samaki. If these ships realized who they were, if they were people who would want to know where to find a Covert of Mandalorians, then any guess they might make on the direction of the hyperlanes in this sector wouldn’t lead them to one.

Kata powered up the hyperdrive and waited until the last possible second to hit it. Most modern ships were able to handle the ripple from another ship entering hyperspace, but on the off chance their pursuit wasn’t one of them, then any annoyance was to the good.

“You fuckers are lucky I don’t have time to fuck you up.” Kata muttered as the Talon made the jump. Once she was sure things were working properly, she ran back to the hold where Ordo was collapsed in a heap. She paused only for a second, heart in her throat, before dropping to her knees and unhooking the safety lines. “Sorry sorry, fuck…”

Ordo groaned. Kata let out a whoop. “Oh thank the manda…”

“...did we get out…?” Ordo rolled to his back.

“Yeah. Yeah, we did.” Kata let out a semi-hysterical laugh. “Had some company on the way out, gonna have to take a longer way home, but…” She stopped babbling as Ordo suddenly sat up and pressed the forehead of his helmet to hers. “....oh.”

“You’re brilliant.” He murmured.

“Yeah, I know.”

Cuan finished getting his armor on. Something was coming, he could tell. He was still tired, he could tell that he didn’t have anywhere close to his normal stamina, but he’d do his part, just as he’d been raised to do.

He ran through the list of things he needed to be responsible for. The Taris ship had landed not long before. Even from his own quarters, he could hear the sounds of joyful reunions. Lypatri was likely with Upio. If so, Kalni would corral them. Lypatri had been given instructions. She would know what to do.

He should go to his ba’buir. Tuathal could get around just fine, mostly, but in the event of having to evacuate, he’d feel better if he were there, with him. Cuan set the go-bags by the door and set out for Tuathal’s quarters.

Lypatri and Upio were together when the five year old twin terrors of the Samaki Herd decided that they wanted to change their colors, “Like the banthas we saw once!” One rolled around in the grass, trying to turn green, while the other stole a bowlful of berries from the kitchens and smashed it on his head. Upio had taken one look at them and their stained and torn clothes and sighed the world weary sigh of someone who has seen this before.

“We should take you to my buir and get you cleaned up.” Upio took one twin and at her direction, Lypatri took the other and marched them to Kalni’s workshop. Kalni had taken one look at them, shaken her head, and mock-glowered at her youngest.

“Did you teach them this?”

“No, buir! They came up with this all on their own!” Upio tried to look offended but was giggling as she said it.

Kalni looked at the tears in the unrepentant twins’ clothing. “Well, this is a mess, you two.” She glanced at Lypatri. “You should get home. I’m sure your buire are wondering where you are.” Lypatri nodded and gave Upio an awkward wave before trotting off.

Upio gave Kalni a slightly hurt look. Kalni smiled. “She needs to spend time with her new family, too, ner kar’ta. Now go get the mending kit.” Kalni smiled fondly after her youngest. Upio was unrestrained in her affections, flinging hugs around wherever she went. Lypatri clearly wasn’t used to such things, nor had she ever been in a place to be demonstrative herself. It would take time but Kalni had seen a lot of Foundlings come and thrive. Lypatri would get there.

She smiled to herself. So would the al’baar’ur.

Din stopped by the kitchen first to get something for Jha’iil to eat. Kreez seemed to be more stressed than usual, with several things going at once. Jha’iil turned to give Kreez a big smile. “Ice cream?”

Kreez paused and looked at Din. Din shrugged helplessly. “I promised him that he could have ice cream if he was good… and he was very good, but we weren’t able to find any.”

“Jate!” Jha’iil said proudly. Kreez laughed.

“I’m sure you were, ad’ika. I don’t have any right now… but I can make some later.” He brightened. “I can make some for the riduurok.” He bustled over to a notepad on one of the counters and scrawled something down. He picked up a plate of small honey-glazed dates. “Try these.”

They were the perfect size to slip under a helmet. Din popped one in his mouth and let out a sound as a peppery burn exploded across his tongue. “...Oh.”

“What do you think?” Kreez asked anxiously.

“They’re good. Surprising.”

Kreez let out a soft sigh. “Yeah, my… someone I knew before really liked these.” He looked down and sighed quietly.

“Testing out dishes for the celebration?”

“Yeah.” Kreez handed Jha’iil one and the kid took a bite, wrinkled his nose, and started to scrape at his tongue. Din chuckled and found him some milk to rinse out his mouth. He found some jerky for Jha’iil to chew on- it would keep him happy for a while and not spoil his supper.

Kreez turned back to the stove when the triple alarm went off.

“...shit.”

Teryn tasted the sharp bitterness as the adrenaline coursed through her body. Zake looked around anxiously. “What is it?”

Teryn gave Zake’s arm a squeeze and nodded at Tabor. “Start moving everyone to the lower level. Do you need help getting him onto a stretcher?” Moving Cormu was the first thing they needed to do.

“No, I did that already. Just in case.”

Teryn nodded. “Good.” She glanced out the window, frowning. “Hopefully it’s just… a false alarm, but best to treat it like it’s not.” Tabor and nodded and darted off.

Zake grabbed Teryn’s wrist. “Senaar, what’s happening?”

Teryn smiled in what she hoped was reassurance. “That’s the alert that tells us an unknown ship is nearby. We’re going to move you and the other people we have here into the lower levels. Just a precaution.”

Zake’s skin paled noticeably. “....did someone follow us?”

“I don’t know.” Teryn glanced out the window again. She didn’t have her communicator with her but Tabor had his in his helmet. Once they got everyone situated in the lower level, they could try to figure out what was going on. For now, she needed to just deal with the mess in front of her. She gave Zake a reassuring smile. “I’m going to move you now. We’ll be back with you as soon as we can. It won’t be long.”

Zake put a hand to her head. It was feeling better- the pressure-pain was almost entirely gone. “...Where’s Kot? Where’s your brother?”

“He went to handle a few things while I took care of you.” Teryn started pushing the hoverstretcher. “He’ll be here as soon as he can, I’m sure.” _If he can._

Down the lower level, Tabor had tucked Cormu in a corner with his various monitors. Teryn double-checked the volume on all of them, just to make sure that no alarm would lead anyone to their location. “You wait here. We’ll be back.”

“Blaster?” Zake set her jaw. Teryn paused for half breath before nodding and handed Zake her own blaster. Zake could barely sit up, but it was better than nothing and would make her feel safer.

“Please don’t shoot any Mandalorians.” Teryn moved quickly back up to the main level. There was just Vha left to collect. Out in the compound, everyone had scattered inside. Teryn nodded to herself. That was the plan- everyone would get under cover and head for the tunnels. She had to trust that both Cuan and Din would take care of the children. And Atin.

She saw Tabor helping Vha down the hall and nodded at him. “Anyone else?” He had turned off all the lights and shut the doors.

He shook his head. “All the comms say is that there’s a ship that came out of hyperspace close by. Still trying to get an ID on it.”

Teryn glanced around. They had some supplies down there and if they needed to move further into the tunnels, then Tabor would get the word. “Lets go.”

There was a thump behind them and all three whirled around, Vha ducking behind Teryn. She had no armor and no weapons and no desire to become even more of a liability that she already was. Vha’s nerves were already stretched as far as they would go. Teryn’s hand went down to her holster before she remembered that her blaster was with Zake so she unclipped one of her shock batons instead.

Paz came out of the shadows. “What are you doing up here? Get down!”

Teryn tapped Tabor and gestured for him to get Vha down with the others while glaring at Paz. “That’s what we’re doing.”

Paz bit back a retort. “I’m to stay with you. Alor wants a warrior here.”

Teryn narrowed her eyes. “We’re all warriors, al’verde.”

Paz waved a hand dismissively. Teryn heaved a sigh. Yes, having a fully trained, experienced warrior with a helmet was useful, and he was there. It made sense.

But gods. Really?

Tabor settled Vha in a corner with a blanket. Vha was clutching one of the books Teryn brought her and Teryn saw what looked like the strill stuffie hidden under the blanket. Teryn did not make any indication that she saw. Vha would be embarrassed and it was stressful enough with Paz there.

Teryn checked over Cormu again, disheartened. Nothing catastrophic was happening, but his numbers were starting to decline. Nothing they did seemed to help and moving him seemed to have made them slip down even faster. She looked at Zake, who had managed to sit up, clutching the blaster. “How’re you feeling?”

“Better.” Zake swallowed anxiously. Teryn handed her a carton of water.

“Once this is over, we’ll find my brother and get you somewhere more comfortable.”

“What is with your di’kut of an ori’vod and constantly bringing home aruetiise women, anyway?” Paz snarled. He turned and glared at Teryn. “The beroya woman, her…. you.”

Teryn flicked her shock baton on and took a step toward him. He stepped back and she twitched her mouth. Yes, he was under an immense amount of stress which always result in becoming a bigger ass than usual, but they did not have time for this. “What’s going on up there?”

As soon as the alert sounded, the Taris people had been swept inside. Feralia clutched Kurshi and followed Atriu’s direction down into the tunnels. She glanced around, counting her people. Everyone was there… except Grey. “My.. our pilot, he’s… they took him…”

Atriu nodded. “He’s in the med bay, the al’baar’ur will take care of him.” She pointed down a tunnel. “That way, follow the lights.” As the last of the stragglers made it down into the sanctuary, the light behind them blinked out.

Rima ran to her war room. The ship appeared to be a single New Republic scout- they’d taken over some of the Imperial equipment and repainted it and it was broadcasting a New Republic ping. But she didn’t want anyone to know where they were, New Republic, former Imps, warlords- it didn’t matter. They were all enemies until proven otherwise.

She frowned tensely, watching the monitor. The Armorer came in, followed by Sadet, and the three of them watched the ship go by. The sentry ship Rima had sent up had darted away at the first sign of the scout ship and the sentries at the top edge of the valley were under cover. Sure, an in-depth scan might pick up a single person here or there but it was a low enough chance that they were willing to risk it.

The ship appeared to be going on its way but just as Rima let out a sigh of relief, another ship dropped out of hyperspace almost on top of the scout ship. “...shit.” This ship didn’t have any markings that they could see from where they were, nor was it broadcasting any signals at all.

The scout ship tried to hail it, and the Mandalorians could only watch as the mystery ship opened fire on the scout ship. After an exchange of volleys, the mystery ship started heading for the planet’s surface, clearly damaged. The scout ship didn’t stay to see the result of the firefight, but jumped away into hyperspace. The three leaders all rolled their eyes. You needed to make sure the kill was clean. Even the youngest trainees knew that.

Rima and Sadet glanced at each other. Most of the surface around the valley was rough mountains. While they had a projection that disguised the buildings, to hide the entire valley was a bit beyond their capabilities. And if the ship was intending to land where they could attempt repairs… the valley was the most likely place.

“Can’t let ‘em leave.” Sadet grunted.

Rima nodded slowly. “Send everyone deeper. Ship that size can’t have too many on it, but just to be safe.”

The Armorer tilted her head, considering. “It’s a former Imperial troop ship. It could carry as many as a hundred troopers.”

“You’ve seen these before,” Rima said. It wasn’t a question.

“I have.” Her tone indicated precisely where she’d seen them. Bearing down on their base on Concordia, the night of the Purge.

The ship limped its way down and landed in the middle of the clearing, leaking black smoke. One of the hatches opened and several stormtroopers piled out, coughing. Rima swore softly and Sadet caressed his hammer.

Rima quickly sent a message for the bulk of the warriors to come up to the ground levels but remain out of sight. She didn’t have a count yet of how many there were and she didn’t want to start with an all-out assault. Not with the ship’s guns in play.

They watched the platoon commander come out of the ship and look around, clearly confused. Sadet grunted again. “We need one alive.” Rima and the Armor both looked at him and he shrugged. “We do. To comm back and say everything is fine.”

Rima nodded slowly. A group of about ten broke off and started heading for the med bay while several smaller groups broke off and dispersed in different directions. Rima grinned. “Don’t even have to split ‘em up.”

Din crouched in the kitchen, holding Jha’iil and watching the troopers start to disperse. He saw the group heading toward the medbay and had to consciously resist the urge to run after them. Teryn was there. She wasn’t alone and she could handle a handful of stormtroopers. She’d proven that more than once.

He watched another group of three come towards the kitchen and grinned savagely. Kreez was behind him, flipping a knife. “Quick and quiet?”

Din nodded. “Quick and quiet.” He put Jha’iil in a big stock pot and held a finger up. “Shhhhh.” Jha’iil ducked down into the bottom of the pot and waited. He knew what he was supposed to do. Stay down, stay quiet, and his buir would come for him when it was over.

It was over quickly. Trooper armor covered more than traditional Mandoalorian armor but weak spots were weak spots. Kreez took the first, then the third while Din stabbed the middle one between the neck and shoulder.

They pulled the bodies inside where they couldn’t be seen. “Where do you need me?” Din asked on the comms. “Al’verde?”

Kalni didn’t have time to get Upio and the twins to one of the tunnels. When the alert sounded they were in the middle of getting the twins clean and even with aborting the bath, the ship had landed before they could get to the nearest entrance. Eatha was with the warriors but she had these other three to protect.

She bared her teeth and pulled on her helmet. “Upio, you two, stay behind me. Do not run off. _Do not even think about it._ ” Upio understood the tone in her buir’s voice well and took a firm grip on each twin.

Two troopers were coming towards the workshop, looking around. Kalni heard one of them saying “....this looked empty from above, what is this?”

Kalni drew her blaster and gestured for the children to couch down low. Upio flung both arms over the twins. The first trooper was taken by surprise but the other charged at Kalni before she could fire a second shot at him. He bowled her over and she managed to flip him over.

They both rolled to their feet. Her blaster had skidded under the table but she wasn’t defenseless. She took the sharp scissors from the holster at her side and brandished them defensively. “Get the fuck out.”

The trooper held his hands up- he had also lost his blaster in the struggler- then cocked his head as he saw the children. “....shit….” The kids at all leapt to their feet, Upio standing protectively in front of the boys, eyes gleaming with fury.

Kalni butterflied open the scissors and sliced his arm. Upio gasped from behind her. “Bu, the fabric scissors….”

Kalni snarled and stabbed the trooper between the ribs under his arm. Just as she was about to pull out the scissors, she heard Rima calling over the comms to take one alive. She shoved the trooper to the ground and snarled again. “Triangle, get me some of the cording.”

In the tunnels under the medbay, Paz tilted his head. “A group is coming in here. Alor says ten. One is being supported.”

Teryn nodded. Differences aside, he was the al’verde, and they’d played this game before. “What’s the play?”

Paz glanced down the tunnel, thinking. He pulled off a glove and snapped his fingers. The sound echoed down the corridor eerily. Teryn grinned viciously. “Like that time in the mines?”

“Exactly.” Paz nodded. “Lure them down.”

Teryn nodded back and looked back at Tabor, Zake, and Vha. “Hibir, stay with them.” Tabor nodded, drawing his blaster. Zake held Teryn’s own blaster back out to her and Teryn shook her head. “Keep it.”

She looked at Vha, trying to press herself as far back into a corner as possible, trying to make herself small and unnoticeable. Teryn’s mouth tightened in sympathy. The first battle after her own rescue had been hard, so hard, and there had been less at stake for her. “Don’t worry,” she whispered, “We got this.”

Vha nodded tightly. Paz glanced back and wordlessly tried to hand her a blaster. Vha’s face became even paler in the darkness. Teryn shook her head slightly. Paz’s shoulders dropped as he looked at his daughter, then back to the tunnel. “Go.”

Teryn darted down the tunnel and took a turn that would bring her to an entrance near the room they were using as a morgue. She could hear the sounds of the troopers in the medbay, probably fucking around with her careful organization. _Assholes._ She snapped her own fingers, smiling with bloodthirsty delight at the echoes.

“Wolves asleep amidst the trees  
Bats all a swaying in the breeze.”

The eerie notes she sang echoed down the corridor and floated up into the med bay proper. Just as expected, there was a pause in the noises.

“But one soul lies anxious wide awake  
Fearing all manner of ghouls, hags and wraiths  
For your dolly Polly sleep has flown.”

There was a sound of unmistakable arguing. (“Go see what it is!” “No, you go see!”) Then hesitant footsteps followed the lyrics down, down, down. Silently, Teryn moved back towards where she knew Paz was waiting. She gave a snap and a snap responded. He was ready.

She ducked around a corner.

“Don't dare let her tremble alone  
For the witcher, heartless, cold  
Paid in coin of gold  
He comes he'll go leave naught behind  
But heartache and woe  
Deep, deep woe.”

The group- not all of them, only seven- went past where she was waiting, not looking to the side. She grabbed the last one, slit his throat, and pulled back into the darkness.

“Birds are silent for the night  
Cows turned in as daylight dies.”

There was a pause as she started the song again, further back in the tunnel, then a series of curses, one of which ended in a gurgle. Paz had got one. She ducked down a side tunnel and looped back nearer the morgue.

“But one soul lies anxious wide awake  
Fearing all manner of ghouls, hags and wraiths  
My dear dolly Polly shut your eyes  
Lie still, lie silent, utter no cries.”

A single baster shot rang out, then a scream, and pounding feet came towards her. She grinned again. Another shot rang out.

“As the witcher, brave and bold  
Paid in coin of gold.”

The remaining troopers ran towards her and she flicked on one of her shock batons. They paused as she stepped out in view.

“He'll chop and slice you  
Cut and dice you,  
Eat you up whole.”

One of the troopers had the presence of mind to raise his blaster and she powered up her vambrace energy shield and ducked behind it. The blaster shots bounced off. She grinned again as Paz appeared in the shadows behind them.

“Eat. You. Whole.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Art by the incandescent Kmandofan90, in one of those occasions were the art inspired the scene
> 
> Lullaby of Woe by Ashley Serena https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GglL2SWccb0 (Yes, it's from The Witcher 3. The creepy factor is just SO GOOD.) 
> 
> Mando'a translations
> 
> aruetiise: Outsiders  
> Buir: parent (Pl: buire)  
> Ner kar'ta: my heart, my star  
> al'baar'ur: Doctor  
> Jate: Good  
> ad'ika: little one  
> riduurok: marriage agreement  
> Senaar: Bird  
> al'verde: commander  
> di'kut: idiot  
> ori'vod: older sibling  
> Hibir: student


	47. You can run, you can hide, you can pray

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Battle and after battle.

It was hardly even a fair fight, Eatha thought as she swooped down on a small group of troopers. They were split up, badly trained, badly equipped, and hardly a match for a highly skilled group of Mandalorians defending their home.

Just because it wasn’t a fair fight didn’t mean she was going to feel bad about it. She had been a child when the Purge came. She remembered the fear at seeing the Troopers coming through their home. She remembered her buir scooping her up and running. She remembered screaming on the evacuation ship and not quite knowing why, and she remembered her buir trying to keep her quiet while shaking with rage and fear herself.

She never once forgot who it was that brought this destruction on her home and her people. As Eatha grew up, she was determined to help bring vengeance down on the head of the Empire. The fact that the Empire fell just as she came of age was no matter.

Clearly, she thought, looking down at the troopers below her, it was no matter at all. She snagged one trooper by the neck and belt and gunned her jetpack up into the sky. Was it absolutely necessary to pick him up? Well, no, though it did save the blaster shot. It was _fun_ to drop the trooper down on another group outside the Nevarro building.

Eatha hadn’t expected war to be her calling as a child. She’d expected to follow in her buir’s footsteps. Oh, her buir was a warrior, too- they all were- but her time and energy was more spent keeping the Tribe clothed and shod. Kalni’s armor wasn’t for show, but it rarely saw use. She saw fighting and war as a necessity and one she preferred to leave to others.

Eatha had bloodlust.

She dove down on the group of troopers and opened fire on them. They were so shocked by the assault of a lone, small woman that they barely had a chance to raise their blasters.

“Dammit, verd’ika!” Ademe snapped over the comms. “Stop showboating and wait for backup! You’re being reckless!”

“I’m-” Eatha cut off with a grunt as a shot hit her pauldron. She whipped around and fired several shots- several more than were strictly necessary- at the offending trooper. “FUCK YOU.” She activated the knife blade in her vambrace and started towards the extremely dead trooper.

“Go cover the ship!” Ademe ordered. “Now!”

Teryn looked down at the pile of bodies, letting the last one fall. Not bad. Less than five minutes and she and Paz had eliminated seven of them. “Alor said there were ten?”

Paz nodded. “Three more upstairs.” He considered. “The baar’ur can protect the ...patients…” Teryn noted the very slight hesitation on “patients” but let it be. They needed to get through this crisis before handling the next one. “Go.”

Teryn turned and went up the stairs leading towards the morgue. There shouldn’t be anyone in there but if those fucking troopers messed with the bodies in any way… She pulled up short at the sight of a man she didn’t recognize crouched in the corner. He whipped his head around at the sound of her and she narrowed her eyes and drew a knife.

As he inhaled to say something, she darted across the room and clapped a hand over his mouth, holding the knife to the soft spot just under his ear. “Are you with them?”

Frantically Grey shook his head and held up something around his neck. Teryn glared at him, digging the tip of the knife in just a little to make her point, and looked down at it. A kar’ta beskar. She scowled fiercely and breathed, “Stay quiet.” He nodded frantically, eyes flicking back to the door. Teryn glanced back to see Paz coming in.

Teryn cautiously removed her hand from Grey’s mouth and stepped back. He crouched back into the corner, eyes wide but remaining silent. Teryn and Paz went to the door that led to the rest of the med bay and looked out, staying in the shadows.

Paz signaled for Teryn to stay behind him and she nodded, ready to do just that until she heard a sound that made her heart stop.

“Bu?”

Din ran from the Nevarro kitchen towards the med bay. Paz hadn’t answered but the Armorer had told him that a number of troopers had gone to the medbay. He left Jha’iil with Kreez, who had barricaded himself into the kitchens. They’d be fine.

He took out a few straggling troopers and watched as one of the Samaki people picked one up and dropped him on his comrades. If he hadn’t been so focused on getting to the med bay, on getting to Zake and Teryn, he would have been impressed. Across the compound he saw a flash of red armor- Cuan. He was on a roof with a sniper rifle, picking off troopers as he saw them.

“Vod…” Cuan said into a private channel.

“I’ll check on her, don’t worry.”

“Vor’e.” There was another shot and a savage chortle. “Got you, turdfucker!” Din huffed out a laugh. He knew the man had picked that up from Teryn.

Teryn darted down the hall, Paz behind her. Lypatri was supposed to be with Cuan, or with the other children. What was she doing there? She skidded to a halt at the sight of Lypatri, frozen, staring at three troopers. The troopers were staring back, and one started to raise his weapon.

Teryn shrieked and charged at him, vambrace shield activated and shock baton set to the maximum. She flung Lypatri behind her and slashed at the trooper with the weapon with the edge of her shield. He grunted, falling back, and she slammed him with the shock baton in three successive blows.

He fell, smoking, and with another shriek she went after the next. He turned and ran, running smack into Din’s chestplate. Din fired his blaster at him and kept moving. Teryn pulled her vibroblade and stabbed the trooper several times below his chest plate before whipping around and charging after Din.

Lypatri ran to Teryn’s side, grabbing for her belt. Teryn swept one arm to hold Lypatri protectively and shot a look at Din. “You got this?”

“Get her out of here!” Din’s armor took a wild shot from the remaining injured stormtrooper. Din snarled and shot out his grappling line and dragged the offending trooper into his grip. Teryn hauled Lypatri out of the medbay, past the bodies of the two troopers. Lypatri stared at them, then up at Teryn’s furious face.

Teryn looked around for cover- it appeared most of the stormtroopers had been neutralized, but… another group of troopers charged out of the ship, straight at them. Teryn’s hand went to her holster and she swore as she remembered that she’d given her blaster to Zake. There was the roar of a jetpack and a flash of red armor above her. She activated the vambrace shield and crouched down, using it and her body to shield Lypatri. Lypatri clung to Teryn, but was silent and still.

Cuan landed in front of them, two blasters drawn, and mowed down the troopers coming towards his family. How dare these fuckers threaten his home, his aliit, his riduur and his ad’ika? He heard a shout from Din behind him and took a knee without a pause. Behind him, standing protectively over Teryn and Lypatri, Din helped Cuan pick off the last of the troopers.

There was a pause in the shooting as the two men looked around to see if there were any other enemies. Teryn looked up as well but did not lessen her grip on Lypatri or deactivate the shield. She glanced up at Din, waiting to get the all clear.

Din looked down at Teryn. “You alright?” She nodded and he tilted his head at Lypatri. “Her?”

“I think so. Kurs’ika? Are you hurt?”

Lypatri shook her head. Teryn looked around warily. People were coming out of their sniper spots, some dragging trooper bodies. She could see Kalni marching a trooper, tied with some brightly colored cording, toward the Forge. A small group of warriors advanced on the imperial ship.

Teryn rose to her feet and deactivated the shield. Cuan turned around to look at them both, reaching out to touch Teryn’s arm. She shifted her weight to void her body away fromthe contact. “Is it clear?”

There was a pause as both Cuan and Din paused to listen to the comms. “Yes. We have two alive.” Din said. “Where’s… where is she? Is she…?”

Teryn nodded. “She’s fine, she’s down in the lower levels. Go.”

Din let out a half-breath. “Thank you.” Then he ran into the med bay.

Paz was poking at one of the dead bodies and pointed him down to the lower level. Din followed the trail of death to find where Tabor was frantically working on Cormu and Zake was aiming a blaster at him.

“Kot.” She lowered the blaster as she saw him.

Din let out a groan and before he realized what he was doing, he ran to Zake and pressed the forehead of her helmet to hers carefully cupping one gloved hand around the back of her head. She let out a small gasp and relaxed, breathing in his air. “You’re okay,” he muttered. “It’s over, you’re safe.”

She nodded, gripping his upper arm below the pauldron.

Din looked over at Tabor. The baar’ur was shaking his head. “I need…. He’s crashing and _I don’t know why._ ” He looked up at Din pleadingly. “I need the al’baar’ur. Please?”

Vha shakingly stood up, pulling the blanket around her shoulders. “I can get her. She’s up there?”

Din nodded. “Vor’e. Just outside.” Vha vanished out the door, still clutching the blanket. He looked at Zake again. Her color was so much better, even in the dim light, and her face wasn’t drawn in pain. He let his fingers stroke the back of her skull lightly. “I’m sorry we didn’t have... I’m sorry that… I’m so sorry.”

She shook her head. “We’ll talk about this later. Right now…” she looked at Tabor.

Din regretfully let her go and went over to Tabor. “What can I do?”

Teryn looked down at Lypatri, who was clutching her belt with both hands, and put a hand on the child’s head. The wolf ear hat had gotten lost somewhere but they’d find it. She looked at Cuan. “Are you okay?”

He nodded. “You?”

Teryn nodded, adrenaline starting to crash. “Why wasn’t she with you?” She was a little surprised at how sharp her tone was… but she was angry,.

Cuan paused, slightly taken aback. “I-”

“She was supposed to be with you! How did she end up here?” Teryn glared.

“She was with Kalni…”

“Clearly not! She would have kept…” Teryn let out a breath as she felt Lypatri’s fingers loosen on her belt. “You were supposed to keep an eye on her!”

“She was collected! I was getting Ba’buir to safety!”

“THAT ISN’T WHAT WE AGREED.” Teryn realized she was yelling at full voice. “That isn’t what we told her to DO.”

“It’s not his fault! Kalni sent me home and no one was there and I didn’t know what to do so I came here…” Lypatri shrank away from Teryn. “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to… I didn’t know what to do.” Her anxious eyes filled with tears.

Teryn closed her eyes, counted to three, and let out a breath. Cuan slowly took a step forward to Lypatri. “It’s not your fault, ad’ika. It’s okay. You were doing your best.” He tilted his head at Teryn. “Your bu is just relieved that you’re okay.”

Lypatri started to cry in earnest. “I was so scared.” Teryn knelt down and reached for Lypatri but the kid backed away, tears streaming down her face, eyes wide and scared.

Teryn sighed. She’d seen how sensitive Lyaptri was to adult anger before. They needed to remember that. “I’m sorry I yelled, cyar’ika. It’s okay, I’m not mad at you.” She beckoned with her fingers and Lypatri slowly took a hesitant step forward. Teryn pulled her into a hug but Lypatri remained stiff. Teryn shot a worried glare at Cuan. Cuan knelt down and took them both into an embrace- he didn’t want to admit it but his heart had stopped when he saw them both run out of the med bay, straight towards the group of troopers.

But they were fine. Everything had worked. His family was safe, his tribe was safe, and his home was safe, for the moment. There were still some unanswered questions but for now, they were okay.

There was a soft clearing of the throat. “Al’baar’ur? They need you. The other man… I don’t know his name, but it’s not…he’s…. they need you.”

Teryn nodded and gently untangled herself from Lypatri. “I need to go back to work, okay? You stay with your buir and do as he says.” She traced a finger down Lypatri’s nose as Lypatri nodded, still looking small and scared. Teryn glanced at Cuan, put a hand on the cheek of his helmet that he covered with his own hand and squeezed. Then she ran inside.

Vha watched Teryn go, then back to Cuan and Lypatri. She knew the dar’manda al’baar’ur had adopted the child, she’d heard that she was to enter into riduurok with a warrior from this tribe, but to see the evidence that someone who’d been cast out could find a place and love and acceptance… that was something else entirely. She sighed and trudged to her room.

Down in the lower level, Teryn found Tabor trying chest compressions on Cormu, but one look at the monitors told her it was hopeless. She’d known that moving him was likely to speed up his decline, but it had already started. There was nothing more she could have done, nothing Roccan could have done if he were there. They’d chosen to put Cuan in the tank rather than Cormu, and from that decision, all of these effects had followed.

She shook her head. “It’s over.” She had to put the guilt over his death aside for the moment as she drew the blanket over his head, covering his face for the final time.

Tabor sighed. He knew, had known when he started, that it was hopeless. “Was there anyone else hurt?”

“I don’t know. But we should get everyone upstairs… and have someone clean up the bodies down here.” Teryn sighed. “We’ll put him in the morgue with the others… I take it the ships from Taris have come back?”

Tabor nodded. “That’s what I was coming to tell you when the alert went off.”

“Okay.” Teryn thought for a minute. “One of their people… I assume it was one of them- is in the morgue. Someone should go get him out. There’s three more dead troopers… we’ll find out what they want to do with them.”

Din had gone back to Zake’s side. “Do you have a room for her?”

Teryn shook her head. “Not one that’s set up… that’ll take a bit. She needs to stay in the med bay until I can check everything but,” Teryn smiled reassuringly at Din. “It went well. Please stop bringing broken people back for me to fix.”

Din’s shoulders dropped visibly. “Vor-”

“Shut up. There’s no debt. Help me get everyone upstairs.”

“I should probably get the Kid out of the stock pot, too.”

Teryn let out a slightly hysterical laugh. “He’s where?”

Paz piled the dead troopers from the tunnels onto a hover stretcher. The Armorer had instructed that all of the bodies should be brought to their ship. In the corner where they’d brought Vha and Cormu and the Twi’lek woman, Paz found the book and the stuffed strill that Vha had dropped.

He picked up the strill, running his hands over the worn fur. He knew very well that Faris had still had the toy, that he hadn’t been quite willing to give it to a younger Foundling. He wasn’t entirely surprised to see that his youngest had given it back to Vha.

He’d gotten it for Vayez not long after he’d adopted the kid. One of the elders had managed to get the fabric and the stuffing and made stuffed toys for the children. There were some who thought that giving the children toys would just make them soft but Paz had never agreed with that. His buir and ba’buir had toys when they were growing up and they were anything other than soft. His kids could have a toy or two.

He tucked the strill and the book into his belt and directed some of the other warriors in removing the bodies. Then he went up to Vha’s room. The door was locked, so he put the book and strill down in front of it.

He stared at the door for a while, then said, haltingly, “Ad’ika… I… I wanted you to know that I’m… I’m not ashamed of you. You didn’t fail anyone. And I’m happy that you’re alive. I know that doesn’t… fix anything but…” He sighed as his comm pinged, summoning him to the Armorer. “I missed you, cyar’ika.” He tapped his palm against the door, then left.

Vha curled up in her bed and let the tears fall silently.

Rima and the Armorer stared down at the trooper Kalni had subdued, still with the scissors in his side. Ademe marched in with an officer from the ship, the only officer they’d found. A sharp scent of piss told everyone that he already knew what his fate was. Ademe forced him to his knees. Paz and Sadet joined the two women and all of them stared down at the officer, expressionless helmets radiating savage fury.

“What brought you here?”

The officer lifted his chin and said nothing. Rima twitched her lips beneath her helmet. She’d expected this, to be honest, and she’d planned for it. That didn’t mean she liked what she was about to do.

“Call for the ruug’alor.”

Tuathal had been waiting for this call. He walked in, slowly, escorted by Cuan and Atriu, in his armor and helmet. His real armor, not the light token armor he usually wore. He tilted his head down at the officer and trooper, considering. He pointed at the officer. “Him.”

Ademe reached down and pulled the scissors from the side of the trooper and stepped back. They all waited impassively while he bled out into his chest.

The officer looked up at the Mandalorians. “I know I am dead already. I will not talk.”

Rima nodded. “So you say.”

Tuathal pulled off one of his gloves and put a hand on the man’s cheek. “We ask you again. What brought you here?”

The officer’s eyes glazed over. “We were following the New Republic scout ship.”

“Why?”

“To see where they were patrolling. We need to know their routine.”

Tuathal nodded slowly, digging his fingers into the man’s cheek. “Who do you serve?”

“The Empire.”

Tuathal sighed and shook his head. “The Empire is no longer. Who do you serve?”

“Moff Gideon.”

There was a collective hiss and Paz stepped forward. “Where is he? Where can I find that demolgaka?”

The officer startled out of his reverie and stared at Paz. Rima hissed sharply and the Armorer put a hand on Paz’s arm. “We will find him. We will bring back his head. Right now, let this play out.”

Paz growled deeply, but stepped back. The officer stared at him, eyes wide, until Tuathal dug his fingers in again.

“Where is he?”

“I don’t know.”

Tuathal deepened his voice. “Tell me the truth. Where is he?”

“I don’t know!”

Tuathal tilted his head towards Rima. “That’s true.”

Rima nodded. Sadet grunted and she nodded again. “We need him to go to the ship and for him to tell his commanders that they needed to do some repairs but they’re on their way back. Can you do that?”

Tuathal nodded and removed his hand from the officer’s face and stepped back. The officer blinked and Ademe grabbed him by the scruff of the neck and marched him out. Cuan smoothly stepped to Tuathal’s side and put the old man’s hand on his arm.

“Are you okay, ba’buir?”

“I’m fine, ad’ika. It just… takes a lot of energy.” Tuathal leaned a little on Cuan’s arm until they got out in view of the compound, when Tuathal stood up a little straighter. Still holding on to Cuan for support but no longer leaning on him.

The officer looked around, frowning, then stared at the ruined temple at the other side of the river. “....is that a Jedi temple?”

Ademe shook him roughly. “Shut up. Keep walking.” Cuan glanced at Tuathal, but said nothing.

They marched to the Imperial ship, up to the comms unit. Ademe forced the officer down. “You will send a message with no funny business. You will tell them that you needed to make some repairs, you saw nothing of interest, that you are continuing on your way. Do you understand?”

“I will do no such thing.” The officer was trying desperately to retain whatever dignity he had left. “I know you will kill me, but I will not…” He paled as Tuathal followed them in. “...jedi.”

“I am no sorcerer.” Tuathal reached down and splayed his hand on the officer’s face again. “Do as she said.”

The officer’s eyes glazed over as he began typing away. Ademe watched to make sure the content was as she had dictated, nodding along. Once he was done and the message was sent, he sat back. Tuathal staggered back against Cuan, drained. Sadet had followed them, and once he was satisfied that the message was on its way, he took the officer’s head in his large hands and quickly snapped his neck.

Ademe looked around, thinking. “Get the rest of the bodies on board. We’ll take it up, set it on a course to go into a star.”

Cuan looked up from his ba’buir. “I think the beroya’s ship can help with that. They’ve used it to… dock with other ships before.”

Ademe nodded. “Thank you, ruug’alor.”

Tuathal nodded in exhaustion. “Ad’ika, help me back. I need…. I need to rest.”

Cormu was brought to the morgue. The man that Teryn had surprised (and threatened) had left. Teryn wondered if the dead warriors or the child were part of his family, and that’s why he was there. There wasn’t time for any more ponderings as the wounded came straggling in.

There weren’t many, and none badly injured. More the result of exuberant defense than anything else. The stormtroopers had been completely surprised by the response and it took less than twenty minutes to eliminate the threat.

Even so, Teryn thought as she wrapped up Eatha’s wrist, having a ship of enemies land in your yard was disquieting at the very least. Din had helped Zake to a room and found her some blankets at least, then had to leave to do something with the Imperial ship. Cara had gone with him. She’d been sent to the landing area to make sure that no troopers messed with any of the Covert’s ships and was most disgruntled at having missed most of the action.

Lypatri had been sent to wait with the other children, but eventually crept back to the med bay as the sun began to go down. “Bu?”

“I’m in here, ad’ika.”

Lypatri stopped at the door of the supply room and peeked in. Teryn put away one more box and turned to her kid. “Come here.” Lypatri obediently stepped forward, looking anxious. Teryn smiled and ran a finger down her nose. “Come on, I have one more person I need to check on, and then we can go home and have some dinner, okay?” She led Lypatri down the hall. “Where’s your buir, do you know?”

“I think he’s with ba’buir,” Lypatri whispered. “One of the other kids said he looked very tired.”

Teryn frowned to herself. She should check on him. She knocked on a door and at Zake’s voice, let herself and Lyaptri in. Zake had been dozing for most of the afternoon, comforted by the sight of a sentry. It wasn’t Din, but these were Din’s people. She was safe here, possibly the safest she’d ever been in her life.

“How are you feeling?”

“Much better, thank you.” Zake smiled down at Lypatri, whose hand had snuck around Teryn’s belt. “Hello, little one.”

“‘Lo.” Lypatri mumbled, then looked up at Teryn and squared her little shoulders. “Hello. My name is-” she paused, glanced at Teryn anxiously, then started again. “It’s nice to meet you.” Teryn gave her an approving nod. Lyaptri grinned proudly.

“This is my ad, my daughter. We call her Kurs’ika.” Teryn squeezed Lypatri’s shoulders. “We should get you some food. My ori’vod should be back later tonight but you’re welcome to join us for dinner if you like.” Teryn checked the surgery site. “I’ll need to remove the shunt tomorrow, but you’ll be fine.”

“Thank you.” Zake looked at Teryn wonderingly. “I didn’t know… he didn’t tell me you were a doctor.”

Teryn nodded. “It’s come in handy once or twice, my brother being who he is.”

Zake suddenly smiled. “I bet it has. Yes, some food would be nice. It’s been…. We stopped at Leh’mu and got food there, but I don’t know how long it’s been. I vaguely remember Kot saying he could get us here faster…”

Teryn tilted her head speculatively, but let it pass. Lypatri glanced at Teryn then solemnly back at Zake as Teryn said, “I’ll find you a chair. You shouldn’t walk all the way to our quarters, not yet. Come on, Kurs’ika.”

Lypatri trotted out behind Teryn. “Bu, what’s Kot?”

Teryn stroked Lypatri’s hair. “You don’t miss much, do you? Kot is what our buir used to call your ba’vodu. It means "strength." He must have told her.”

“He must like her very much.”

“I think he does.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mando'a translations
> 
> Buir: Parent (Diminutive: bu)  
> Verd'ika: Private  
> baar'ur: Medic  
> Vod: Brother or comrade  
> Vor'e: Thanks  
> Aliit: clan, family  
> Riduur: spouse  
> Ad'ika: child  
> Ruug'alor: The Old Alor  
> Demagolka: someone who commits atrocties, a real-life monster, a war criminal - from the notorious Mandalorian scientist of the Old Republic, Demagol, known for his experiments on children, and a figure of hate and dread in the Mando psyche  
> Kurs'ika: Wolf Cub  
> Ba'buir: grandparent  
> Cyar'ika: sweetheart  
> al'baar'ur: Doctor  
> dar'manda: a state of not being Mandalorian - not an outsider, but one who has lost his heritage, and so his identity and his soul - regarded with absolute dread by most traditionally-minded Mando'ade  
> Riduurok: love bond, specifically between spouses - marriage agreement  
> Beroya: Bounty hunter  
> Ori'vod: Older sibling  
> Ba'vodu: Parent's sibling


	48. Every step and every storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts on home and safety and identity and what comes next.

Rima stood in a clearing watching the sun go down. The defense had gone well. Everyone had worked well together. The only casualty was Cormu and that, she understood from talking with the al’baar’ur (whose name she still did not know, and Rima knew very well that the al’baar’ur would not tell her until the riduurok was performed) was probably going to happen regardless.

Even so, it was another death to take out of Gideon’s hide when they found him.

And they would find him.

The Taris Tribe had been taken to another one of the buildings. It was clean, at least, and they had their things with them. Feralia had asked if they could spare a few supplies while they regrouped but for the most part, the Taris people just wanted to rest and figure out their next steps. And reassure themselves that their children were safe.

Rima sighed. They needed to honor the fallen warriors, Taris’ fallen child, and they needed to honor Cormu. They needed to figure out what was to be done with the dar’manda girl.

They needed to decide if they were going to stay in this location. They needed to decide a lot and while it was ultimately her decision, she needed input from the members of her Tribe. Plus there was the Nevarro Tribe to consider. She and the Armorer had never really determined how they would work out the leadership aspects. Things mostly seemed to be working but Rima had lived long enough to know that things could “just work” up until the moment they didn’t. No, they needed to discuss the issues.

And now with the Taris people… All of Rima’s people were warriors. They had other skills, other ways to support each other, but when push came to shove, each one had armor and weapons and could defend their home. The Nevarro people were the same. The Taris people weren’t. It was clear they were civilians, not warriors.

Were they truly Mando’ade?

And in the midst of all of this, there was the riduurok celebration. Cuan and his cyare had been patient enough and at this point, everyone needed something to look forward to.

Teryn, Zake, and Lypatri had a pleasant dinner in Teryn and Cuan’s quarters. The cooks for both Tribes had worked together to provide a hearty stew for everyone and while the bulk of the Samaki people chose to eat in the mess, Teryn told herself he didn’t want to subject Zake to that chaos.

The truth was she didn’t want to subject herself to that chaos. Cuan was managing Tuathal and a few other things and while Teryn tolerated eating communally with him, she didn’t like it and she detested it without him. Eating in her own Tribe had been private, for family, and not something you did with just _anyone_. She was able to manage during the war but often chose to take shifts that went over mealtimes just so she wouldn’t have to worry about what she looked like while eating, whatever it was aruetiise talked about while they ate, if she was eating things correctly. Even eating just with Tuathal and Atriu could sometimes be a bit much. Teryn had a vague feeling that she should try to keep Lypatri from growing up with the same anxieties.

She sighed to herself. Lypatri would grow up with her own anxieties.

Like the fear in her eyes when Teryn had been yelling at Cuan. It wasn’t fair to yell at him like that, she knew, but she’d been terrified when she saw Lyaptri in front of the troopers, absolutely terrified and utterly enraged. She should not have lit into him where their child could hear. Certainly not a child that had been subjected to angry adults that pretty clearly took their anger out on the defenseless children around them.

Well. If nothing else, Lypatri would grow up able to defend herself. “Probably with a bomb, my little terrorist.”

“What, bu?” Lypatri looked up from the bowl of stew she was in the process of demolishing.

“Nothing, ner kar’ta.”

Teryn watched Lypatri attack her stew with messy gusto, shoveling in overflowing spoonfuls with one hand and alternating with huge bites of bread in the other. Teryn flushed and said apologetically to Zake. “We haven’t worked on table manners yet.”

Zake merely nodded and shook a napkin out and laid it on her lap. Lypatri slid her eyes over to Teryn. Teryn paused and did the same. Lypatri put her spoon down, held the bread in her mouth, and put her napkin in her lap. Zake glanced at Teryn, mild amusement dancing in her eyes. “It’s a start.”

Teryn flushed with embarrassment again.

Teryn sent Lypatri back with the dishes while she brought Zake back to the med bay to sleep. They really didn’t have another place for her and knowing Din as she did, he probably hadn’t thought of it until he entered hyperspace. She also didn’t know if he’d even had a chance to report in to the Armorer (or Rima? Who was in charge?) and at any rate, it would be better to have Zake held under observation. Teryn didn’t expect any complications but complications often happened when you didn’t expect them.

“It’s nice here,” Zake said as Teryn pushed the hoverchair. “It seems… almost peaceful.”

Teryn huffed back a laugh. Yes, peaceful until the Empire landed in the front yard. “You haven’t seen it when the children are swarming around.”

“Are Mandalorian children so loud?”

Teryn smiled. “They can be. They’re able to be noisy here, there’s no one around for thousands of miles that could hear them.”

Zake nodded. “Where is…. Pol? ….I’m sorry, I don’t remember the word for nephew.”

“Vod’ad. I think my ori’vod took him along. He doesn’t like being left behind.”

“Ah.” Zake nodded. “That’s why he was with Kot. When he…. Came for me.”

Teryn nodded absently, seeing Cuan near the med bay. He gave her a tired wave and she gave an anxious one back. He walked over- slowly, not his usual ground-covering lope- and gave Zake a nod. Zake nodded back, frowning slightly. She recognized the armor, but he had his helmet attached to his belt, not on his head.

Cuan hesitantly reached out to touch the back of Teryn’s neck, stroking lightly, and she closed her eyes, shoulders relaxing slightly. He let out a breath. “How are you?”

“We’ve eaten. You should, too.” Teryn gave him a hesitant smile. He returned it, squeezing her neck.

“I had something. Ba’buir is…. He’s sleeping.” There was a tone that told Teryn he didn’t want to say more in front of Zake. No matter how much Din trusted her, no matter how trustworthy she’d proven herself to be, there were things that were only for family. “How’s Kurs’ika?”

“Fed.” Teryn sighed. “She should go to bed soon. I’ll stay with her and you can do what you need to. I’ll tell them they can call me if something comes up, but…”

“I think Rima is planning on honoring the fallen tomorrow night. Giving the new people some time to cope with everything.” He nodded back down at Zake. “Good to see you’re doing better. We were worried.”

Zake nodded again. “Please tell your….” she frowned as she searched for the word, “...alor’ad? Alor…. Something… please tell your chief that I very much appreciate the hospitality.”

Teryn brought Zake back to her room, got the monitors set up, and left with promises of being by first thing in the morning. “Tomorrow we’ll find you somewhere more comfortable to stay while you figure out what happens next.”

“Thank you.” Zake settled back into the bed. “She’s a delight, your daughter.”

“We like her.” Teryn smiled.

“Was she rescued from the slavers?”

“She rescued herself. My ori’vod helped a little.” Credit where credit was due.

Back at their quarters, Teryn heard Lypatri rummaging around in her room, making small noises of distress. “Kurs’ika?”

The noises all stopped, then there was the unmistakable noise of things being thrown into drawers. “Um. Everything is fine!”

Teryn looked around for help but there wasn’t any to be found. Just her. “Come out here, ner kar’ta. I want to talk to you.” There was another wary silence and Teryn winced. “You’re not in trouble at all, I promise.”

Lypatri slowly edged her way out of her room, clutching the wolf ear hat. “I found it. It got messed up.” There was a muddy boot print on it and the lining on one of the ears was torn.

Teryn reached out to take it so she could look at it. “We can take it to the tailor tomorrow and see if she can fix it.” She handed the hat back to Lypatri and nodded to the couch. “Sit down, ner kar’ta.”

Lypatri slowly sat down, clutching the hat again, looking worried. “What did I do?”

Teryn took a breath and thought carefully about where to start. “Earlier… today, gods, it was today… Atin caught a rodent in your room. I found your food stashes.”

Lypatri’s eyes got big and scared and she cringed. Teryn shook her head.

“I’m not mad. Are you used to needing to stash food?”

Lypatri gave a tiny nod.

“I thought you might. We have plenty of food. You will always have enough food.” Teryn tucked one of Lypatri’s curls behind her ear.

Lypatri stared back solemnly but her shoulders relaxed a bit.

“You can put whatever you want in the cooling unit.” Teryn nodded toward the kitchen unit. Lypatri blinked and nodded slowly, dubiously. “If you want to keep food in your room, you can, but we can’t have food where the rodents can get at it. I’m going to get you a box you can put food in, if you need, but it needs to be sealed up, okay?” Lypatri nodded again, relaxing still more. Teryn smiled at her. “And it needs to be cleaned out once a week.”

“Okay.”

Teryn smiled in relief. One issue down. “I also want to apologize for scaring you before. I shouldn’t have yelled at your Buir.”

“You were scared.”

“I was very scared. But I shouldn’t have… I shouldn’t have.”

“You killed people.” Lypatri blinked. “You were really scary.”

“I killed stormtroopers that were threatening my family. Our family. They are not people.” Teryn said firmly. “We do what we have to protect ourselves and our people. And,” Teryn ran her finger down Lypatri’s nose, “I will do whatever I have to protect you.”

Lypatri nodded seriously. “I know.” She did know that, now. If her Bu was there, everything would be okay. Her Bu would protect her.

“And so will your Buir and your ba’vodu. And everyone else here.”

“Morut'yc?”

“That’s right. Morut’yc.”

Lypatri went to bed not long after that, tucked in with her stuffies, Atin curled up at her feet. Teryn had the urge to watch the child sleep but didn’t want to embarrass her. She did leave Lypatri’s door open and quietly sang a lullaby while she tidied up. After two repeats, Atin trotted out to rub at her ankles.

“Is she asleep?” Atin purred harder. She grinned down at him and gave him a scratch around the ears. He’d come around, just as she’d expected. She looked down at the go-bags, still placed neatly by the door and decided to leave them for the moment. No decision had been communicated, one way or the other, and she’d rather remain prepared. Just in case.

She armored down and paced a bit in the main room before propping open the door to go outside with Atin. Now that things had calmed down, she was full of nervous energy and had nowhere to put it. Atin climbed up to his perch on her shoulders and she continued to pace outside, flipping a knife knife in one hand. She was still doing that when Cuan came home an hour later. “LaarSenaar?” He said softly as he came into earshot. It was never a good idea to surprise a woman with a knife and a loth cat.

Teryn stopped pacing and looked at him. “Kurs’khaded.” She twitched her shoulders and Atin hopped off. Cuan strood forward and gathered her into his arms, burying his face in her hair. “Ner cyare. Is our ad’ika okay?”

She gripped him back, nodding, comforted by his arms and his scent. “She’s asleep.” She started to say something else, but he cut her off.

“I don’t want to talk. Not yet.” He pulled her inside and shut the door.

Later, curled up under his chin, she asked, “How is ba’buir? Kurs’ika told me one of the other kids said he looked tired.”

“He needed to help with getting intelligence from the officer we captured. It took a lot out of him.” He swallowed. “I’ve heard of such things but never seen him do anything like that.”

“How did he…?”

“Sorcery, I think. He just… asked. Rima didn’t seem surprised. Then ba’buir forced the officer to report back that they had needed some repairs but were on their way.” Cuan shook his head. “I brought him back to sleep, he said he was just tired….”

“Do you want me to go check on him? I’ll go now.” Teryn started to sit up and Cuan pulled her back down onto his chest.

“No. Tomorrow. He said he just needed sleep…” He sighed as Teryn’s fingers traced down his face. “Atriu is with him. She’ll call if anything changes.”

“Are we going to be moving? Do you know?”

Cuan shook his head. “I don’t… I don’t think Rima has decided yet.”

“What about my… the other… What about the Nevarro alor? What does she think?”

“I don’t know. I think Rima is waiting to see if we get any confirmation that the ploy worked. She doesn’t want to leave here, I know that.”

Teryn nodded, eyes beginning to drift shut. “Thank you.”

“For what?”

“Coming to protect us like that.”

Cuan kissed the top of her head. “You protected her first. I heard what you and your al’verde did under the med bay.”

“It was only seven.” She suddenly went limp as she fell asleep and he smiled. No matter how hard a day was, having her fall asleep with him was the best way to end it. He tangled his fingers in her hair and let out his breath. He’d known from the beginning that she was magnificent and he’d seen the kind of damage she could do as a warrior, almost equal to what she could put back together as a healer. Seeing his warrior bird in action was something else entirely.

“Sleep well, LaarSenaar, ner jai’galaar.”

Teryn woke up, safe in Cuan’s arms. No matter what the day would bring, starting it in what had quickly become her favorite place made anything bearable. She still couldn’t quite believe how her life had so drastically changed. She let out a quiet laugh. Cuan stirred.

“What’s so funny?”

She smiled and touched his nose. “That I almost have Gideon to thank for everything.”

Cuan grumbled. “I’ll thank you not to mention that name in our bed again.”

“That’s fair.” She ran her fingers over his lips. “Go back to sleep. You need the rest.” He nipped at her fingers and nodded, snuggling down under the blankets. She touched his head again, then went to go start her day.

Lypatri was also still asleep. Under her desk, as Teryn fully expected. The wolf ear hat was on her nightstand and Teryn decided to let the child sleep longer. If there was training that day, Lypatri could skip it. But she took the hat so she could bring it to Kalni to see if it could be repaired.

The sun was well up in the sky but other than the sentries up on the edge of the valley, not many people were up and about. There were a few people outside the building the Taris people had been given and the kitchens were already emitting good food smells, but it was clearly a quiet, lazy morning for most.

Teryn stopped by the Nevarro kitchen to get some behot- sure, technically, the Samaki kitchen was closer but Kreez brewed it better. She found him scribbling some notes and muttering to himself. He gave her a speculative look.

“What kind of ice cream do you like?”

“....I don’t.” Teryn frowned.

Kreez sighed, gave her behot, and ordered her out of his kitchen.

Well, then.

Clutching her mug in one hand and the wolf ear hat in the other, Teryn went to Kalni’s workshop. Kalni was up and bustling about. Neither Upio nor Eatha were to be seen. Teryn thought it was likely that Upio was also still sleeping after the excitement of the previous day. Kalni gave her a bright smile.

“Good morning!” She shoved something under her work table.

Teryn nodded a greeting. “Morning.”

“How’s Lypatri doing after yesterday?” Kalni smiled apologetically. “I didn’t realize there wasn’t anyone home when I sent her back or I would have kept her here.”

Teryn waved her hand to dismiss it. “It wasn’t anyone’s fault. She’s… a little shaken, but…” she shrugged. “I think she’ll be okay.” Kalni tilted her head but didn’t say anything. Teryn shrugged slightly defensively. “We all saw worse while growing up.”

Kalni hummed, then caught sight of the wolf ear hat. “Oh, no.”

“Yeah, it got a little messed up during the fight. Can you fix it?”

Kalni took it and turned it over in her hands. “Yes, of course. I know how much she loves this hat.” She looked up eagerly. “I could make a few extras, it’s going to get hot here soon and this one is a bit warm.”

Teryn frowned. “That’s a nice thought but… I think one of the reasons she loves it is that it was a gift from her Buir.”

Kalni winked conspiratorially. “I’ll give them to him to give to her.” Teryn nodded hesitantly. Kalni grinned and leaned down on her elbows. “So, tell me. I know what he’s giving you, what are you giving him?”

“....what?”

Kalni tilted her head. “A wedding present. For Cuan.”

Teryn frowned and glanced around for some explanation. “I don’t… what?” Teryn had noticed that Kalni seemed to tilt her head whenever she did or said something the tailor found odd. Which was probably everything.

“Traditionally, the people entering into riduurok exchange gifts with each other,” Kalni said slowly. “Is that not a thing for your people?”

“I…. I don’t know? It’s private. It’s not… we don’t… we never…” Teryn stopped, flustered. “...I have to do what?”

“It’s just a gift! Something small.”

“I can’t make things. I don’t make things. I don’t have _things_. He…. he already has all my songs and I don’t… this is a terrible idea.”

“What is?” Kalni tilted her head again.

“This! This whole thing. We don’t need this, I don’t want this!” To her horror, Teryn felt the tears beginning to rise up in her throat. “This is too much.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you upset.” Kalni held her hands out. “Please… it’s okay.”

“It’s not.” Teryn shook her head. “I’m going to screw up my kid and I’m going to embarrass him and I don’t like ice cream and I don’t want anyone to feed me cake and stare at me and wonder why…” She cut herself off before she could say _why would he choose her._ “I just want… I just want to be left alone. I’m good at that.”

Kalni smiled sympathetically even as she moved slightly to the side so as to make the path to the door clear. She’d already gotten the impression that the al’baar’ur was shy. She knew, as did everyone, that Cuan was extremely protective of her but she hadn’t realized how deep the anxiety went, down to outright fear. She doubted anyone really did, possibly not even Cuan. “One step at a time. If you don’t want to be fed cake, then we’ll make sure people don’t feed you cake.”

Teryn eyed her warily, waiting for the question of _why_. Kalni frowned, thinking. “I do know that man of yours tends to wear out his undershirts to threads before replacing them.”

Teryn nodded slowly, still uncertain. “I’ve noticed….”

“What if…” Kalni tapped her chin, thinking, “What if we design a winter underlayer for him?”

“....and?”

“Oh, I’ll make it, don’t worry, but the design will come from you.” Kalni pulled out a sketch pad and with quick, sure strokes drew out a quilted undershirt. “He calls you LaarSenaar, right?”

Teryn glanced at the door again before nodding slowly.

“Does your clan have colors?”

“...no… we just... “ Teryn gestured to her unpainted armor. “We just have this.” It probably hadn’t occurred to Din that they could have a color.

“I like it. It’s simple.” Kalni drew out a pattern on the front of the undershirt. “I can use this in the quilting. What do you think?” She turned the pad so Teryn could look at it. Teryn eyed her nervously for a long breath before edging closer to look.

It was the outline of a bird, wings raised up over its head. Like the wings of the shriekhawk. Teryn’s eyes flicked back to Kalni, who was watching her with a mixture of excitement and kindness. Teryn nodded slowly. “It’s good.”

“You like it?”

Teryn nodded again. “I do.”

Kalni gave an open grin. “I’ll get going on this. You should come in at some point and do a couple of stitches… just a token, you know? But he’ll like it.”

Teryn nodded slowly and edged for the door. “I should go… Patients… Thanks.”

“Of course. And don’t worry about the cake. We’ll fix it.” Kalni let her smile fade as she watched the al’baar’ur flee- and it was clear that she was fleeing. What had happened to this woman that kindness made her so uncomfortable?

Din piloted the Razor Crest down into the valley as the sun began its descent down beyond the mountains. The Imperial ship had been sent on a course into a star several parsecs away after disabling all the safety protocols that would have steered it away from certain doom. They managed to disable the beacons but there was always the chance they’d missed one. Either way, they’d waited until there was no way the ship could have been salvaged and returned to the Covert.

They had a communication that the funeral honoring the warriors that had fallen on Taris, the child that had been killed during the rescue mission, and Cormu would be taking place that night and they all wanted to be back for it.

Din felt terrible about leaving Zake but the Razor Crest was the best ship they had for the purposes of what they needed. Pre-Empire, no registration, hard to trace. Fast, maneuverable, reliable. He patted the console absently. She was a good ship. She needed a rest and a tune up, just like him.

Jha’iil mumbled from his seat. As far as adventures with his buir went, this one had been kind of dull, but on the other claw, there had been quite a lot of excitement before. His buir had promised they would get a chance to stay home and be with their aliit for a while. And everyone seemed to be excited about a party! With cake! And the skraan’ur had promised ice cream!

Din glanced back. “How’re you doing?”

“Jate.” Jha’iil gave him a cheerful grin as he busily pushed buttons and switches on his toy console. Din nodded back.

“We’ll be home soon.”

Feralia held a mug of behot and stared out across the valley. It was a nice place. They’d told her that it was far from any other settlements. There’d been a brief tour, mostly led by the children who excitedly pointed out all of the things, the gardens, the training grounds, the blaster ranges. It was clear this Tribe was one of the warrior Tribes.

Everyone seemed to consider her their alor now. If their (now former, she guessed) alor was even still alive, they had no way to contact him, no way to to tell him where they were. They weren’t even sure where they were. When they were ready to leave, if they didn’t decide to stay, they’d been told that one of the other pilots would take up their ship, bring them to another location, and wipe the navigation logs.

Paranoia ran deep. Feralia could understand that. Paranoia had kept her people alive in another way- by hiding who they were. As civilians, they’d been able to fade into the background of other worlds when word of the Purge reached them. Whole communities, gone. Resistance stamped out.

The bulk of the warriors in their small community had been hunted down. The remaining warriors had gone into hiding while the civilians tried to pretend they were anything but Mando’ade. Eventually, the Empire fell, the warriors were able to come out, but they had all been irrevocably changed by the experience.

After denying their souls to keep their lives safe, did they have the right to call themselves Mando’ade or not? In the deepest part of her heart, Feralia wasn’t certain. But she wanted her child, the children of her Tribe, to have the chance to grow up with their people. If this covert would let them stay, she wanted to make it work.

She glanced off to the very edge of the river where she could see Grey standing, deep in thought and mourning. First they needed to honor their warriors and their beloved Rauff. They needed to deal with the past before they could look to the future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> al'baar'ur: doctor  
> riduurok: Marriage agreement  
> dar'manda: a state of not being Mandalorian - not an outsider, but one who has lost his heritage, and so his identity and his soul - regarded with absolute dread by most traditionall-minded Mando'ade  
> Mando'ade: Mandalorian  
> cyare: beloved  
> aruetiise: outsiders  
> Ner kar'ta: my heart, my star  
> Vod'ad: sibling's child  
> ori'vod: older sibling  
> Kot: Strength (Jha's nickname for Din when he was a child)  
> Ba'buir: grandparent  
> Kurs'ika: wolf cub  
> Buir: Parent (diminutive, bu)  
> Ba'vodu: parent's sibling  
> Mout'yc: Safe  
> LaarSenaar: Songbird  
> Kurs'khaded: wolf  
> ad'ika: child  
> alor: chief  
> al'verde: commander  
> Jai'galaar: shriekhawk  
> behot: herb used in beverages, mildly antiseptic and stimulating  
> Aliit: clan, family  
> Skraan'ur: cook  
> jate: good


	49. Dig up her bones and leave the soul alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The day was, as Teryn had kind of expected, quiet.
> 
> Well. Sort of.

The day was, as Teryn had kind of expected, quiet. Bits of clean up here and there. The children found a discarded stormtrooper helmet and were using it as a ball for a version of meshgeroya that only some of them seemed to understand the rules of at any given time.

Teryn left Kalni’s workshop and went to walk by the river. The sound of the running water was soothing, calming. Her little house on Panoog had been near a creek but nothing as wide as this river. The banks were rocky and steep and portions of the river ran over and around the rocks, sometimes cheerfully, sometimes angrily.

She sat down near one of the small sets of waterfalls and let the sound of water soothe her. Kalni was just trying to be nice. Kalni was kind and open, had two children that seemed to be happy and loved. Teryn sighed and rubbed her face. It was all just so stressful.

She glanced up at a ship entering- not the Razor Crest, the Talon. Kata and Ordo, then. Teryn took a deep breath and prepared to face more people. “So many people…” and the addition of the Taris group meant there were even more people to contend with.

It was easier when it was just her, or just her and Din and Jha’iil. So much easier, but...

There was a loud crack of branch and she turned to see her Kurs’khaded standing behind her. She gave him a smile and he came over.

“Kalni…”

“Gossips…” She tucked into his side. “Did she wake you up?”

“No, no. Not at all.” _A little._ “She was concerned. Are you okay?”

She started to say _I’m fine_ but stopped herself. He knew her too well for that, he could see beyond that facade. Unlike the few other people who also could see through it, he was willing to go behind it and so far, he hadn’t been repulsed by what was there. She shook her head.

“What’s wrong?”

“I don’t like ice cream.” She caught her throat beginning to fill up again. “I don’t like ice cream. I don’t like parties. I don’t like people staring at me. I don’t like eating with other people. I don’t like people wondering what’s wrong with me. I just…”

“You’re anxious about the riduurok.” He put his hand on the back of her neck and squeezed lightly. She let some of the tension release as she leaned into him and nodded.

“I know it’s important, I know that people are looking forward to it, I know it’s… good for the Tribes. I just wish…” She whispered the last word. “I wish I didn’t have to be there.”

Cuan kissed the top of her head. “We don’t have to stay long.”

“We will, though.” She sighed in his shoulder. “It’s our duty, after all.”

They both went to Tuathal’s quarters. Atriu was curled up in a chair and jerked awake when they came in. “Ba’vodu… sorry… I didn’t mean… I fell asleep.”

Cuan gave her a smile. “It was a long day for you, too. How is he?”

Atriu shook her head and rubbed her eyes. “I don’t think he’s woken up.” She peered out the window. “I think I remember the sun starting to come up…”

Teryn exchanged a glance with Cuan and she went into Tuathal’s sleeping room. The old man was lying on his back but she could see the rise and fall of his chest. She let out a breath and went to his side. Pulse: slow but strong and steady. Color: still a bit peaked. She frowned and carefully pinched a bit of the skin on his arm and let it go. It was slow to return back down and she nodded to herself. Dehydrated. Not surprising.

The scanner showed that he was basically fine but…. “Hm.”

Cuan stood in the doorway. “Is that a good ‘hm’ or a bad ‘hm’?”

“It’s a… ‘hm.’ There’s a bit of a heart murmur… I’ll have to talk to your al’baar’ur about it…” She carefully shook Tuathal’s shoulder. “Ba’buir? Ba’buir, I need you to wake up.”

Tuathal stirred and his hand reached up to clasp Teryn’s. “Ad’ika…. The verd’ika? Where is he?”

“My vod’ad?” Teryn asked, glancing back at Cuan. “He’s with my ori’vod, he's with his buir. They went to help deal with the Imperial ship. They should be back soon.”

“I need… he needs more… training. He needs more. There isn’t much time.” Tuathal’s fingers gripped Teryn’s tightly. “Bring him to me.”

“I will, I will. But ba’buir… you need to get something to drink. You’ve been sleeping for a while, you need fluids. Okay?”

“You have to bring him. There’s no time.”

Teryn could feel his pulse start racing. “Ba’buir, please…. I need you to breathe. Breathe for me, okay?” She pulled back slightly, thinking rapidly. She could hear Cuan in the other room at the comms, asking for someone to bring a hoverstretcher. That was good, but... She set her jaw and dropped her voice by half an octave. “Get yourself together, ruug’alor. Tion gar gai?” _What’s your name?_

Tuathal froze at the commanding tone in her voice. “Tuathal Tadasco.”

“Megin aliit?” _What’s your clan?_

“Lytau.”

Teryn kept the firm tone going even as Cuan and Tabor came in with a hoverstretcher. “We are taking you to the med bay where I will give you some fluids and check you out. That is what is happening right now. I will bring my vod’ad to you when they return and when you are recovered enough for it.”

“You need-”

Teryn cut him off with a sharp tsk. “ _You_ need to do as I say.” She nodded at Tabor and Cuan and they carefully shifted Tuathal to the stretcher. “I just want to check him out and get him fluids…” she murmured to Cuan.

Cuan watched his ba’buir be pushed out of the room and gripped her hand tightly. “Should I have let you see him last night?”

“What’s done is done.” Teryn squeezed his hand back. “I’ve got it from here.”

In the med bay, Teryn got Tuathal set up with fluids and did a more in depth scan. The heart murmur was concerning, but… she tapped her fingers against her belt as she thought. Well, his blood count was a little low. A transfusion wouldn’t hurt. She set that up as well and left his room to find Rima waiting near the door.

“Alor.”

“Al’baar’ur.” Rima looked in at the old alor, hooked up to several monitors and with the blood and the fluids going into his arm. “I saw you bring him in…”

Teryn nodded. “He’s dehydrated. I don’t know what he did but it took a lot out of him.” She frowned to herself, thinking about what using his powers did to Jha’iil. “....Kurs’khaded… he said he used… sorcery?”

Rima nodded, still staring into Tuathal’s room. “I asked him to.” Teryn nodded silently. Rima sighed quietly. “I know he doesn’t like to force people into doing things but…” She shrugged almost helplessly. “I asked him to. It was easier.”

“He agreed. He made his choices.” Teryn said softly. “He would do anything to protect this place and his people.”

Rima nodded. “Did he ever tell you how we came to be here?” She walked into Tuathal’s room and ran her fingers across the back of his hand. Teryn shook her head.

“After the Purge… gods those days… I don’t know what it was like for you but we had a feeling something was coming. As soon as Saxon was installed we started making quiet preparations to leave Mandalore. Even if we didn’t know that extermination was in the cards, he didn’t want to stay where Saxon could try to get us under his thumb; none of us did. We’d survived so much....” She shook her head. “We were almost ready to go when the gunships came on us. Almost. Not quite. We lost… well. You know. We lost. Many. We fled, because the only other option was annihilation.”

Teryn nodded. She did know. Sometimes the sirens still echoed in her dreams.

“Tuathal… he knew of this place from when he was young. And he knew it would be abandoned. None of us questioned it. It was safe. We were able to regroup here. Find others. We made it our home. And it was perhaps selfish of me but I didn’t want to have to leave, not if we can ensure that no one would come looking for us.” Rima’s mouth tightened. “So I asked. And he gave. I just hope… I hope he didn’t end up giving more than he had.”

Teryn adjusted one of the fluids. “I’ll do my best. It’s up to him but…” She gave Rima what she hoped was a reassuring smile. “You know my vod’ad has… similar powers?” Rima nodded. “Well. When he overstretches himself, he just needs a lot of sleep. I’m hoping that with a little support, that’s all ba’buir needs, as well.”

Rima gave a ghost of a smile. “Ba’buir?”

Teryn shrugged. It was basically true.

Rima gave Tuathal’s hand another pat and gestured Teryn out into the hall. “You and Cuan have been patient. We’ll honor the fallen… finally… tonight. Then the riduurok celebration can be… in a few days? Is that too soon?”

Teryn shrugged. “Just... let’s get it over with.”

Rima gave Teryn a sympathetic smile. “I can’t promise it will be low-key, but it should be raucous enough that people will be distracted by the food and the drink.”

Teryn then took her visiting medkit to check in on the Taris people. The baby that Solde had found and his older brother had been released into the care of their Tribe and she wanted to check on them, and also to make sure everyone was in good health.

The first person she met at the door was the man she’d held a knife to the day before. He eyed her suspiciously, looking first at her armor, then the blue armband on her left arm, then at the battered leather bag she held. It had been a gift from her last CO at the end of war and the Rebel starbird was still faintly visible on it. “Alliance?” She nodded. “Didn’t think many of us fought in that, _officially_.”

“It’s complicated.” She nodded at the scratch in his neck where she’d dug her knife in. “Sorry about that.” Grey grunted, still eyeing her. She tilted her head, eyes narrowed. “I came to see if anyone needed medical attention.”

“We’re fine.” he said shortly.

Teryn settled back on her heels, shifting her posture so the blue armband was more prominently visible to anyone inside. “I wanted to check on the ik’aad, specifically.”

Feralia appeared at the door, Kurshi just behind her. “Ah, the doctor. They said you’d be by.”

Teryn nodded at her, then tilted her head in expectation at Grey. He only reluctantly moved aside at Feralia’s cleared throat. Teryn gave a gracious nod. “Thank you.” She followed Feralia into the building, glancing around. At the moment, they appeared to just be camping in a few rooms.

Feralia looked back at Grey, still standing at the door and shrugged almost apologetically. Teryn nodded in understanding.

The baby chortled in happiness to see her and she grinned as she tickled his belly. He had bounced back admirably; eating well, happy, healthy. “I think we have Edeemir to thank for that. He definitely kept him warm and safe.”

Feralia nodded. “A good strill. If we hadn’t left him with them….” She sighed.

Teryn nodded. “And the others? No one was terribly injured, thank the gods.”

“Some nightmares, they’re all clingy….” Feralia looked around until she could see Kurshi. “But they seem to be okay.” She nodded down at the baby. “This one and his older brother will need a new buir... I had hoped Grey might consider, but…”

Teryn glanced back at the man still standing at the door, like the close confines of the building were too much. “The child that was killed…?”

“His nephew. And Raulin, one of our warriors… was his brother.” Feralia sighed. “They were the only family he had left.” Feralia looked up and smiled at another man who came forward. “San.”

The man was holding a datapad and frowning at it. “I have a list of things we really need. Maybe Grey and I could go tomorrow? It might be good to get him out for a bit…” He smiled down at the baby in Teryn’s arms and held out an arm, offering to take him. Teryn settled the baby in his arms. “Me'vaar ti gar, ad’ika? Is the nice doctor taking good care of you?”

“Lek!” The baby giggled.

San smiled down at him, then back at Feralia and Teryn. “Wouldn’t even know anything happened to him.”

“Ik’aad are like that,” Teryn said. “They bounce.”

“Anyway, alor-” San started again and Feralia winced. “...look, it’s just a fact at this point. Let me take him and we can see what we can get.”

Feralia rubbed her forehead. “We don’t even know if we’re staying here, we don’t know if they want us to, we don’t know anything at this point.”

San nodded. “No matter what, there’s things we need. We saw what was left on Taris. It was all looted. Let me take him, let him work off some of the rage. Maybe blow up an asteroid or two. See if our hosts need anything. You know I’m good at sourcing.”

Feralia nodded. “Okay. Tell him…” She took a deep breath. “Tell him I said you needed to go. I’ll sort getting you out of here with their chief and we’ll… I’ll talk to them about staying, if only for a little while longer so we can figure out what to do.” She turned to Teryn and looked her armor up and down, eyes going back to the mudhorn signet on her pauldron. “You’re all warriors here, aren’t you?”

“Yes.”

Ferlaia sighed. “Please tell your chief I’ll speak to her later today.”

Teryn’s mouth tightened imperceptibly as she nodded. She did not ask which chief.

She almost made it halfway across the compound before getting snagged by Kata and dragged into one of the supply rooms. “How could you not tell me!”

Teryn stared at her in confusion. “Tell you what?”

“He’s a Zabrak!” Kata snorted in annoyance.

Teryn blinked several times. “I…. yes?”

“You could have mentioned! Do you know what I said? ‘Oh, I’m a vegetarian’. Like an idiot.”

Teryn shook her head again. “You didn’t know?”

“How would I know? He wears a helmet all the time!”

“...with horns on it.”

Kata stared at Teryn and Teryn stared back. “Your alor has a helmet with horns on it.”

Teryn shrugged. “I don’t actually know the answer to that one.” She tilted her head. “So how did it go?”

Kata suddenly blushed. “....it was fine. Um. Revelatory.”

Teryn frowned suspiciously. “....ditching the tracking chip was...revelatory?”

Kata turned to the door, hollered, “What? Oh! Yes, I’m coming!” and hobbled out as fast as she could on her injured foot. Teryn raised an eyebrow and shrugged. So it would appear that was going well. Or at least, it was going.

“Maybe they can plan a second riduurok to erase the mess this one will be,” she muttered to herself. She headed back to the med bay to put back her bag, check on Tuathal, check on Zake, and then consider something to eat. The night promised to be full of heightened emotions, and those were always easier to handle on a full stomach.

Feralia reluctantly left Kurshi with the rest of her Tribe when she went to go talk to Rima and the Armorer. She didn’t like the idea of having her child out of her sight, even though this was clearly a safe place. Kurshi and the rest of the children were with their tribe and she could see sentries around. This was as safe a place as anywhere, and safer than most.

She just didn’t like the idea of letting her kid out of her sight, not yet. “Duty calls, I guess.”

She asked Grey to come with her, partially because he had agreed to go out with San (“if they’ll even allow us to leave,” he’d muttered darkly) and Feralia wanted him to get the information he needed directly, and partially because she wanted some support. Grey, as far as she could tell, had never felt as disconnected from their culture as she did. But the Tribes here were warriors and she’d never felt particularly warlike in her life.

Not until they’d discovered their children missing. Then she’d wanted to burn the entire galaxy down.

Rima smiled and gestured them into her office. Feralia tried to walk in calmly but her eyes kept jumping around. The Armorer was in a corner, just… standing. It was eerie. Everything about the warriors that wore their helmets all the time was eerie. Feralia had heard of them, of course, but to see it, to possibly live with it… was another matter entirely.

“Are your people settling?” Rima smiled again. “Sorry about the fuss yesterday. We certainly didn’t plan for an Imperial ship to arrive.”

“I wouldn’t think you did.” In all honesty, it had been impressive to watch the well-trained warriors leap into action. They’d clearly trained for the possibility. Feralia hadn’t even had time to truly process what was happening before it was over. “They’re… we’re…” She let out a soft laugh. “We’re still not letting the children out of our sight.”

Rima smiled, even as Grey looked down at the floor. “I wouldn’t expect you to. We have discussed it and you may stay as long as you need.”

“Thank you.” Feralia glanced at Grey. “We… we lost quite a bit of our possessions. I had hoped to send my pilot out with another of our people to acquire some of what we need. Shouldn’t take too long, but… well, if there’s anything you would like them to pick up....?”

Rima nodded and made a quick note. “I can make arrangements for that. Would you like warriors to go with you?”

“No.” Grey answered flatly.

Feralia glanced at him, then apologetically at the two chiefs. “That will not be necessary, thank you.”

“Just let me have my ship.”

Feralia sighed. She had a feeling she’d need to soothe some ruffled feathers while he was gone. “I understand you hoped to have the…. The funerals tonight?”

“Yes.” Rima exchanged a quick look with the Armorer. The Armorer nodded. “Are there any traditions you’d like to uphold for your people?”

Feralia bit her lip. They’d been hiding in plain sight for so long that they just used whatever was most common for the people around them. They would quietly gather and say the remembrance for the dead, they would muddle their way through the Vode An if possible, but all of their traditions had become centered on concealing themselves.

“They were warriors.” Grey said shortly. “All of them.” _Including Rauff._ “Honor them as warriors.” He stood up and walked out.

Rima and the Armorer watched him go with identical attitudes of sympathy. Feralia sighed and nodded. “Yes, whatever…. Whatever is appropriate. If you can get the list of what you need, I imagine they’ll want to leave either tonight or first thing in the morning.”

Rima and the Armorer exchanged another look, then the Armorer said, “Would you like your children to join the others in training? What’s their education been?”

Feralia shrugged. “Schools wherever we were, mostly. We tried the best we could to educate them properly but mostly we just needed to survive…” She sighed, steeled herself, and looked up. “I’d like them to be educated properly.”

Rima smiled. “I thought you might.”

Teryn was outside enjoying the sunset when the Razor Crest came over the edge of the valley. She let out a breath. Hopefully, this time, he’d be able to stay around. He kept planning to but things just kept happening. She glanced towards the med bay where Zake was napping before dinner. Maybe she should ask Kata to pull an alternator out of the Crest, just to make sure.

She waited patiently until she saw a small green shape running towards her, chattering. “Ba’vodu! BA’VODU!” She let out a delighted laugh and ran forward to scoop Jha’iil up. He waved a paper at her. “Here!”

“What’s this?” She peered down at the drawing.

“Aliit!” Jha’iil pointed out the shapes he drew, making sure she understood that the small shapes were him and Atin.

“I can see that’s you and Atin. You both have big ears.” She grinned down at the drawing. “Is this for me?”

“Yeah.” He snuggled into her shoulder. “Ca’tra?”

She frowned down at him. “....the night sky will be out soon?” She didn’t think that’s what he meant, but really had no idea what he was asking.

“Where ca’tra?” Jha’iil pulled back at her frown and used his hands to pull his ears back. Like…

“...lekku.” Teryn tilted her head, thinking about the dark blue scarf with the golden flecks in it that Zake wore, then looked speculatively up at Din as he approached them. “Hi.”

“Hi.” He looked around and Teryn smirked a little.

“How’d it go?”

“What? Oh, fine. Crashed it, seems to have worked out like we planned.” He shifted impatiently.

“Things are okay here. Clean up, all the things. I bet you want something to eat, maybe a nap before the fire tonight?” Teryn bounced Jha’iil on her hip. “I can take care of him while you go. Take care of yourself.” She grinned, showing several teeth. “Maybe a shower. Clean yourself up a little.”

“What?” He looked at her like she’d grown an extra head.

“Was there something else you wanted to know about?” She tilted her head and smiled bigger. Jha’iil looked at her, then imitated the head tilt at Din.

Din sighed heavily. “How is she?”

“How is who? Kurs’ika? Oh, she’s fine. A bit shaken, but-”

Din growled softly, the urge of an older brother wanting desperately to pound his little sister into the ground rising. Teryn could tell he was about out of patience and he snapped, “Iruz’zake.”

“You always get crankier when you’re smelly and underslept. Which is all the time.” Teryn took pity on him as his hands flexed. “She’s much better. Been sleeping a lot. She can be moved out of the med bay soon, so… you should figure that out.”

“She’s not… she wasn’t too scarred by what happened?”

Teryn tilted her head. “Compared to everything she’s been through? That was nothing.”

Din ran a finger along Jha’iil’s ear, then down his nose. “....speaking of scars….”

Teryn shifted slightly away from him but nodded. “Yeah… um.” She took a deep breath. “Yes. We can talk about that later.”

“But we will. Talk about it later.”

“...yes.” Teryn nodded again. “Yes, we will.”

In the end, Din did shower and change and eat a little something. Teryn was right about how cranky he tended to get when he was hungry and hadn’t had a chance to clean up. Most Mandalorians tended to be fastidious in their habits whenever possible; it was imperative when one spent most of their life in armor. Being able to take some time to get really clean, shave, tidy up his small quarters a little bit and just _relax_ was a luxury.

He shouldn’t get used to it, but it was nice.

Then he went to the med bay. He could see that there were preparations being made for the bonfires- four of them. He sighed. Funerals were not the best introduction to Mandalorian culture for Zake, but then this really wasn’t her introduction, was it? Her introduction was the entire Covert leaping to defend themselves and their home from an attack.

That was a true representation of his culture if there ever was one.

But all his concerns went to the side when she saw him and smiled.

Teryn, Cuan, and Lypatri went to where the bonfires were built. Unlike the last funeral, they could be together and Teryn didn’t feel like she needed to fade into the background. Even so, she still nudged their small family off to the side.

Everyone who had a helmet was wearing it. Lypatri’s fingers were firmly tucked into Teryn’s belt as they waited, eyes big as she took everything in, looking at the unhelmeted and unarmored Taris people for a long minute. She looked up at Teryn, forehead creased in worry, and Teryn smoothed out her curls. “It’s okay, Kurs’ika.” Lypatri nodded and edged a little closer. Cuan gave Lypatri an absent pat. Teryn glanced at him and fit her hand in his.

He squeezed it, the only sign of the turmoil she knew he felt. They hadn’t talked about it, because so much kept happening, but she knew that he felt an immense amount of guilt over Cormu’s death.

“It wasn’t your fault,” she murmured. “It wasn’t your choice.”

“It wasn’t yours, either.”

She sighed. No, it wasn’t. But that didn’t mean she didn’t sometimes rethink everything about that horrible day or the choices that followed. Maybe Cormu would have lived if they’d put him in the tank right away. Maybe he wouldn’t have. They’d never know.

She glanced over as Din joined them, Zake beside him, Jha’iil in his arms, Cara following. Jha’iil had healed her Kurs’khaded; he might have been able to do the same for Cormu. She would never have asked, never have expected, but it seemed somehow _unfair_ that she should get her star back simply because of an accident of family while others lost theirs.

She sighed again and Din glanced over. “You did everything you could.”

Teryn shrugged slightly. “Did I?”

“I know you, vod’ika. You never do anything less.”

She watched as the others came in small groups. Kreez, from the kitchen, joined by Faris and Vha. They stayed in the back, out of the line of sight from anyone. She smiled to herself. It was good to see that Kreez had taken them under his wing a little bit.

The bodies had been laid out on separate pyres. The warriors in their armor and little Rauff had a helmet. Traditionally, the family of the deceased would light the pyre with their flamethrowers but since the Taris people had no flame throwers, they were offered torches.

Teryn watched as Grey stepped forward and lit two of the pyres, someone lit the pyre for Cormu, and a third lit the last pyre. The flames leapt into the sky, bringing the souls of all four warriors to the manda, surrounded by their kin and their people.

“Motir ca'tra nau tracinya. Gra'tua cuun hett su dralshy'a. Cuun hett su…”

_Those who stand before us light the night sky in flame. Our vengeance burns brighter still. Burns brighter still…_

Teryn sang the lament with full voice for the first time in over a decade. On Jelucan, they’d needed to be quiet. When they arrived on Samaki, she’d been too unsettled to join in fully. Now, she sang from her heart and her voice echoed from the seat of her soul -or where her soul had been.

Cuan’s hand tightened on hers. Lypatri looked up in astonishment but Teryn could hear her little wolf cub start to hum along. Jha’iil’s eyes were wide as the firelight reflected in them. He clung a little tighter to Din’s cuirass. Din’s hand patted him comfortingly even as he watched the flames leap to the stars.

Zake watched the fire, but mostly she watched Din and his family. She could tell that both her Mandalorian and his sister were swimming in memories of past pyres, of others lost. Zake turned her attention back to the fire even as she gently placed a hand on Din’s arm. Seeking comfort, or offering it, she wasn’t sure.

The flames raged on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A version of Vode An, the funeral song, can be found here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jKOkmligT1E
> 
> Mando'a Translations
> 
> meshgeroya: limmie or bolo-ball - literally the *beautiful game,* a Mandalorian obsession  
> Kurs’khaded: Wolf  
> riduurok: Marriage agreement (though they mean the celebration)  
> Ba’vodu: Parent's sibling  
> al’baar’ur: Doctor  
> ba'buir: grandparent  
> verd'ika: little soldier  
> ori'vod: Older sibling  
> Buir: parent  
> ruug'alor: old alor  
> vod'ad: sibling's child  
> ik'aad: baby (child under 3)  
> Me'vaar ti gar: How are you?  
> ad'ika: Little one, child  
> lek: yeah  
> Aliit: Family, clan  
> Ca'tra: night sky  
> Kurs'ika: Wolf cub


	50. But still I’m tormented by the wrongs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The past is not dead. It’s never even really past. - William Faulkner

After the fires began to die down, people peeled off to go to their respective homes. Cuan picked up Lypatri, who was yawning so hard she nearly fell over, and led his little family to their quarters. Din watched them go, Teryn with a hand on Cuan’s elbow, Lypatri nearly falling asleep on his shoulder. From the shadows, Atin appeared and trotted alongside Teryn, tail upright and proud.

She was happy here. Happier than she’d been in a long time, possibly happier than she’d ever been. He looked down at Jha’iil who was comfortably snuggled into his arms, merping softly as he dozed off. He was happy here, too.

“He’s happy wherever you are.” Zake smiled at them both. Din looked at her, the moons’ light making her blue skin glow a little. He hadn’t realized he’d said it out loud. Zake tilted her head up at him. “Are you happy here?”

Din inhaled to say…. He wasn’t sure what. “I…”

“Your people are here.” Zake nodded to where Teryn and her family had gone. “Your family is here. He’s safe.”

“...I think I am.”

Zake nodded. “When was the last time you were in a place that made you happy?”

Din flashed first to his childhood home- his first childhood home, with his parents. Then several years later to his other childhood home with Jha and Teryn. It had been hard, growing up the way they did, but there’d been love, and laughter, and songs, and dancing. “It’s been a long time.”

Zake nodded again with a smile. “I thought so.”

Din shifted Jha’iil to a more comfortable position. “My vod’ika thinks you’ll be able to leave the med bay tomorrow. I’ll… find you a more comfortable place to sleep and....” He shifted uncomfortably. “The riduurok… the wedding... will be soon, and after that… we can figure out what you’ll do.”

Zake gave him a hopeful smile. “Some more clothes would be nice, too, I will admit. Maybe boots.”

Cuan woke in the pitch black darkness to whimpering. Unlike every other time such noises had woken him before, it wasn’t from his beloved, sleeping peacefully in his arms. It was from Lyaptri’s room. Slowly, he extracted himself from the beds, pulled on a pair of pants, and smiled as Teryn shifted into the warm space he’d left. He tucked the blanket securely around her, stroked her hair, then went to check on Lyaptri.

His wolf cub was curled under the desk, crying in her sleep. He sighed sympathetically. Teryn had told him that she’d been sleeping under there but they hadn’t had a chance to talk with Lypatri about it. “Kurs’ika. Ner kar’ta, wake up.” He touched her shoulder and she jerked awake, looking around frantically. “It’s okay, cyar’ika. Gar morut’yc.”

“...Buir?” She was tangled in the blanket as if she’d been thrashing about.

“Mmmhmm. Did you have a bad dream?”

She nodded slowly, clutching her stuffed loth wolf, looking worried that she was in trouble.

“Do you want to tell me about it?” He helped Lypatri get untangled so she could crawl out from under the desk.

She frowned. “I think… I think I was getting chased by someone and I couldn’t find Bu. Or you. Or anyone.”

Cuan smiled and ran his finger down her nose, like he’d seen Teryn do. “We will always protect you, ad’ika. We will always come for you.”

“Promise?”

“Promise.” He nodded outside her room. “How about we get some daryc uj’ayl?”

“What’s daryc uj’ayl?” Lypatri crawled out from under the desk, loth wolf tucked firmly under her arm.

“It’s a spiced chocolate-y drink. It helped me after bad dreams.”

“You have bad dreams?”

“Sometimes. Everyone has bad dreams sometimes.” He led her over to the kitchen unit and set some milk on the burner to heat while he chopped up the bricks of daryc uj. “We’ll do a less spiced version tonight, okay?”

Lypatri nodded. “Is bu asleep?”

“Fortunately.” Cuan mixed the chopped up pieces in the warming milk and stirred it. “She doesn’t always sleep well.” He set a mug down in front of Lypatri and she sniffed it. He smiled and poured a splash of tihaar in his own mug. “Drink up.”

Lypatri obediently took a sip and hummed. “This is good.” Then she looked at him worriedly. “My hat got messed up.”

“I know. Kalni is fixing it.”

“How are people going to know I’m a wolf cub without it?”

“They all know. Do you know why your bu calls you Kurs’ika?” He smiled as Lypatri shook her head. “Because she calls me ‘Kurs’khaded.’ Wolf. And you’re my cub.” He pointed to the loth wolf tattoo on his chest. “When I was just born, I was very loud. I cried and howled a lot. My ori’vod thought I was very annoying.”

“You howled like a wolf?”

“That’s what ba’buir told her when she complained that the new baby was too noisy.” Cuan smiled, remembering. “That I was a small wolf cub and she had to help me.”

Lypatri looked at him worriedly over her mug. “...is she dead, too?”

Cuan nodded. “Yes. Her name was Ehka.” He smiled again, faintly. “She died a long time ago.” He looked down at his kid, yawning around her mug. “Are you ready to try again for sleep, ner kar’ta?”

Lypatri drained the rest of her hot chocolate and dropped down from her chair and padded to her room. Cuan waited to see if she’d choose the bed or go under the desk. She looked at the bed, then at the blanket underneath the desk, and finally snagged the blanket and curled up in the bed. He smiled but didn’t say anything. Teryn had told him about her history of sleeping anywhere small and safe, that she’d grown out of it, and with time and patience, Lypatri would, too.

“What does ner kar’ta mean? You both call me that a lot,” Lypatri asked as he tucked her blanket in around her.

“It means ‘my heart’ or ‘my star.’ It means the ones we love are the ones that guide us.”

“Oh.” She thought about that for a minute. “But you’re the ones who are supposed to guide me. Isn’t that what you said?”

“We guide each other, ner kar’ta. That’s how it works.” He smoothed her curls behind her ear and tapped her nose. “Sleep well, my little cub.”

Grey and San were ready to leave when the sun came up. Unexpectedly, they had a passenger.

Cara was annoyed about it. “Karga really needs me back. I want to stay for the wedding, but…” Cara shrugged apologetically. “I’m sorry.”

Teryn nodded back. “It’s been…. Rather longer than expected. Thank you for everything.” She smiled at the small clutch of Taris children beginning to tumble out of their building. “We couldn’t have done it without you.”

Cara nodded. “Send holos. Tell your brother to rest up, there’ll be work for him when he’s ready.” She looked down at the stormtrooper helmet, abandoned after the children stopped playing with it, and picked it up. “Remember when we thought we won?” She threw it to the side in disgust.

Teryn nodded. “Yeah. I do.”

They both watched as Grey stomped past them into the ship, followed by San, frowning at a datapad. “There’s a lot of speciality food things on this list…”

Cara laughed. “For the wedding, I expect. The… cook… what’s the word… skraan’ur? The skraan’ur has some big ideas.” She grinned at Teryn. “I’m sad I’m going to miss it. The food is going to be amazing.”

Teryn shrugged. “He feels grateful to me. Which is ridiculous. Anyone would have done the same.”

Cara smiled. “I doubt that’s true. Send holos and keep me posted on _the_ _situation_.” Her tone made it abundantly clear that _the situation_ was Din and Zake. Teryn smiled and nodded. Of course she would.

“Until our paths cross.”

Teryn went to Kalni’s workshop on her way to the med bay. The tailor must have worked all night to get the undergear cut out and pieced together. Multiple layers, ready to be quilted, with the bird design traced on it. Teryn had frowned at Kalni. “Have you slept? Or eaten?”

Kalni looked at her with slightly unfocused eyes. “Oh, yes. I had… a vitamin bar?”

Teryn frowned harder. “You need real food. And a nap.” She narrowed her eyes. “I’ll let your oldest know.” Eatha would make her buir at least sit down and eat something substantial.

Din managed to wait until the afternoon.

It wasn’t like there was a lack of things to do in the morning. He reluctantly approached the Armorer and Rima about a place for Zake to stay once Teryn released her from the med bay. “Just for a few days. Until the riduurok, and then… then we’ll figure out her next move.”

The “we” was not lost on either alor.

Rima had a small room near her office that had slowly filled up with odds and ends of things. She set some of the children to cleaning it out with the promise that they could ask to keep anything they found and set up a comfortable sleeping room. It shared a wall with the forge, so it was warm, and it was safe, and it was private, for both the members of the Tribe and Zake.

Zake proclaimed it to be perfect.

The Razor Crest needed to be restocked- for real this time- and he asked the two scrappers if they wouldn’t mind taking a look at her, give her a good once-over. By the look of glee on both their faces, he suspected she would get more than a once over. “Probably have to get used to everything again,” he muttered to himself.

Then there was lunch, and checking on Jha’iil in the creche, and then finding a bunch of minor tasks that needed to be done before he finally told himself to stop avoiding it.

What he knew was that there were scars on her back, but he hadn’t seen them. She’d screamed at him about being tortured to get to location at the covert- which she never gave. He’d seen her flinch away from Jha’iil trying to pat her face and he’d heard Gideon say that he could see she didn’t like it. He had pieces of the story, he could see the shapes and shadows her experiences had left behind, but not the entire picture.

Teryn was waiting outside the meday. Sitting in the sun with her face tilted up, taking in the rays. There had been enough days and weeks and months and years without sunlight that she’d gotten into the habit of taking it in whenever she could. Soaking it into her bones, storing the memory of it for when it was needed.

Tuathal seemed to be resting more comfortably and the fluids and transfusion were at least not hurting. He stirred briefly when Teryn checked on him, but quieted when she again promised to bring Jha’iil to him when he woke up. Cuan came to sit with him, face etched in guilt for allowing his ba’buir to extend himself so much. Teryn had left him with a gentle stroke on his cheek. “He’s doing better. I’m hopeful.”

Din walked over, sat down, and waited. After a few minutes, she looked over at him and let out a sigh. He nodded and they stood up and walked toward the river where they wouldn’t be overheard or disturbed.

Neither was sure how to start.

Finally, Din said, “I… I told Zake that you didn’t like to be touched on your face and that I didn’t know why. I thought I did, but… it started before Gideon.” He looked down at his feet and placed his hands on his hips, low, thinking. “And I told her you wouldn’t tell me why.”

Teryn nodded slightly.

“And she asked me… she said, ‘Have you asked her?’ and I realized… that I hadn’t.” He took a deep breath. “So I’m asking. Will you please tell me what happened? All of it?”

Teryn looked at him and felt an entire spectrum of emotion flow across her face. Pain, and fear, and agony, and sadness, and guilt, and then, unexpectedly, a sense of calm, a feeling of rightness. It was time. She nodded again. “Yes.”

Din leaned against one of the rocks, trying to keep his body still and non-threatening. “Please.” He already knew he’d have to work to keep himself in check.

She started to pace. “I told you that… after…after, there was a squadron of eight troopers that I killed. And you know that his… that Laj’s body was covered when it was found. If I hadn’t taken the time to do that, they might not have found me.”

“Who?”

“The second patrol.” She paused and took a breath. “They… I fought them but they surprised me and I was… I didn’t expect... there were only two but... They’d seen the three of us and they knew... they knew there had to be more. They’d get rewarded if they could lead their commander to a Covert. It took them both to bring me in but….”

Din realized his hands were clenched into fists and his flamethrower was starting to activate. He forced his hands to relax, to make his jaw unclench.

“I don’t know how long they had me. There were a lot of them and they…burned... ” she took another shuddering breath. “The scars won’t ever fade. I can’t see them and I used the war to force myself to forget, but when Rokr… when I killed him it all came back and... “ she trailed off.

“Vod’ika…”

“...they held my face. They held it and stroked it and said that I could make it all stop if I’d just tell them what they wanted to know. They knew. They knew what it meant. They knew what they were doing. They knew after a while I’d never tell them. They were just… playing.”

Din felt a rumble in his chest and was startled to realize he was growling. With effort, he stopped. “How did you escape?”

“I didn’t escape. I was rescued. Accidentally. They had a Rebel spy. I watched them torture him. His people came to rescue him, they took me, too.” She looked down at the ground. “I was ready to die. If they hadn’t come, I would have. I would have made them kill me.”

“Is that… when you tried to… come home?” His voice choked a little on those words. Nevarro had never really been home, not to either of them. Her, because they weren’t there long enough before this happened. Him, because he tried to stay away from it as much as possible.

She nodded. “That’s when the al’verde called me a faithless coward and planted the seeds the his ade’s heads that there’s no coming back from this.” When Vha learned first hand what happened to anyone who removed their helmet or had it removed by another.

“Then Gideon…” Touched her in the ways that are the most intimate, the ways that only the very closest members of a family are allowed to.

“Then Gideon.” She shrugged slightly. “That’s what happened. That’s why there are scars on my back and I can’t…no one can...”

“Not even...?” _Not even your intended, your beloved? Your child, the ones you love more than there are stars in the sky?_

“No. Not even them.” She let out a long breath. “So. That’s all of it.”

Din also let out a breath. A number of things fell into place. “I’m sorry. I should have…” Been there. Stopped it. Found you. Asked for the truth.

She gave him a sad smile. “It wasn’t your fault. It happened. And if it hadn’t, we wouldn’t be here. I wouldn’t have… this.” _My beloved, my child, my brother, his child, the ones I love more than there are stars in the sky._

“Still I…” _won’t ever forgive myself._

There was a faint twitch of her mouth. She hadn’t forgotten the words he said on Panoog, the one where he called her a coward. Even if he’d apologized several times… and he had, both with and without any explanation of her side of the story, even if she’d -mostly- forgiven him for those words and those years, she’d never forget them. Ever. “It happened. The past is past.”

“Is it?”

“Well,” _The past is not dead. It’s never even really past._ “Not really. But the only way forward is forward.”

“What about him?” Din nodded in the direction of the med bay, towards Cuan. “Does he know?”

Teryn followed his gaze and smiled, tenderly, softly. “He’s known exactly who I am from the beginning,” she said, remembering what Jha had said in her dream. “He knows everything.” _And accepts it without question or hesitation._ Din nodded. He thought so.

“Now what?”

Teryn looked back toward the med bay. “We need to figure out what’s going to happen with her.” With Vha. “She deserves better than what I got.”

“You deserved better.” Better from the Tribe, better from him.

“Yes. Yes, I did.” She tucked a hand in his elbow and they walked back to the med bay; the air a little more clear, hearts a little less heavy. It wasn’t much and at the same time, it was everything.

At the med bay, Cuan was waiting near the doorway and waved them over. Din tried to politely excuse himself but Cuan shook his head. “He wants to talk to you.”

Teryn let out a breath. “He’s awake?”

“Sort of. Demanded some behot. I told him not unless you said it was okay.” Cuan gave her a rueful smile. “He took that as well as I did.”

She laughed. “You come by it honestly.” He looked from her to Din and back, then pressed a quick kiss to her hair. Something had shifted and it looked like it was to the good. She squeezed his elbow and murmured, “I’ll tell you later.” He nodded, then the three of them went to Tuathal’s room.

Tuathal was sitting up, scowling towards poor Tabor. “Verd’ika, I am telling you, I want some behot.”

Tabor was shaking his head and gave an audible sigh of relief when Teryn walked in, followed by Cuan and Din. Teryn gave a nod of dismissal and turned a glare on to Tuathal. “Ba’buir, I’ll thank you not to scare my hibir. That’s my job.”

“Wouldn’t bring me any behot,” Tuathal grumbled peevishly. He scowled at Cuan. “Neither would he.”

Cuan looked at Teryn with a mild amount of alarm and exasperation. She smiled. “Because they knew that the final decision rested with me. So let’s see if you can have any, shall we?”

“I feel fine.”

“You’ve been asleep for almost two days,” Teryn said, checking the monitors. “You’re better. But you’re not fine.”

“....two days?” Tuathal frowned. “Did I miss the funerals?”

“Yes. They were last night.” Cuan said quietly. “Cormu and the three from the Taris Tribe.”

Tuathal swore quietly. Teryn checked his pulse, feeling the steady heartbeat with her fingers. She could feel the mild flutter but it was much less pronounced than it had been. She frowned, thinking. “Do you have a headache?”

“Because I haven’t had any behot in two days apparently!”

Teryn nodded. “Small amount, half strength.” she said to Cuan. Tuathal growled and she fixed him with a _oh try it_ glare. Cuan vanished out the door. She smirked. “I need to make sure your heart can take the stimulant. You have a heart murmur, you were dehydrated, and you completely overtaxed yourself. So you will be staying here until I am certain it’s safe for you to go back to your own quarters.”

Din smiled to himself. That was the Teryn he remembered. Firm, decisive, confident in her authority. He knew that she was there when it came to her work but she felt even more grounded now than she’d ever been. “Ruug’alor? He said you wanted to talk to me.”

Tuathal tilted his head. “Ah, beroya… I didn’t even hear you come in.” Teryn and Din exchanged a concerned look. Tuathal knew the footsteps and the presence of everyone in his Tribe, and at this point, nearly all the Nevarro people as well. For him to have missed Din’s presence was concerning. Teryn scrawled a note. There was no one to ask about this but maybe she could find some resources somewhere.

Tuathal held out his hand and after a hesitation Din took it. “The verd’ika, your ad’ika… you need to bring him to me. Grogu… he needs more training.”

Din frowned at Teryn. She shook her head and they both looked at Tuathal. “....Grogu?”

“He asked me not to say.” Tuathal sighed. “He likes the name you gave him.”

Din and Teryn exchanged confused looks, then Din figured it out. “...he already had a name.”

“He did.” Tuathal smiled kindly. “He… the impression I got was that he had been told to keep his name hidden. And the name you gave him means so much to you and it means so much to him.”

“Grogu…” Din muttered.

Teryn squeezed his arm and looked at Tuathal. “You remember what I said about our buir not wanting to take our names away from us, when we’d lost everything else?” She sighed. “It’s….”

“He asked me not to tell you. Ni ceta.”

Din shook his head. “I…. thank you. For telling me. I need to… decide…”

Tuathal huffed in amusement. “I think you’ll find that he’ll decide. He’s very firm in his opinions, your verd’ika.”

Din nodded slowly. “He is.” He sighed. “I’ll bring him to you... tomorrow?” He looked at Teryn, and Teryn nodded. _Yes, tomorrow._ “My vod’ika is saying that you still need to rest.”

Tuathal sighed himself. “Fine, but have my behot brought and tell Rima I want to speak with her. There’s much to discuss.”

Din and Teryn left him. Cuan brought the behot and then loped off to find Rima. Teryn looked at Din. “You didn’t know.” she said, trying to pull him out of the spiral he was clearly heading down. “There was no way you could have known.”

“I didn’t have the right. I didn’t have the right to take his name from him. He’d lost so much already, he didn’t have to lose his name, too.” Din snapped.

“You didn’t know. And he’d been talking more and more by the time you named him. He could have told you if he wanted, I’m sure of it.” Teryn sighed. It was hard, she knew. Some people felt that renaming their foundlings was a blessing, a privilege, a right. Jha hadn’t agreed. Children had identities and lives before they were Found. It wasn’t right for an adoptive parent to completely erase that. Even though Teryn had never wanted to open the door to where she’d come from, the fact that she knew Jha would tell her everything she could was a comfort. She had her name and that mattered. It mattered a great deal.

And if Jha’iil -Grogu- wanted to keep his name to himself, that was his choice.

Din sighed again. The day had already been a lot. “I’ll talk to him. But…”

Teryn smiled faintly at him. “He’ll let you know what he wants. He always does.”

“He wants ice cream.” Din huffed. “You got him addicted.”

Teryn shrugged, unrepentant. “He deserves it. He’s a good boy.” She tapped Din on the helmet. “You’re a good buir. Buir would be proud of you.”

“Really? I feel like…”

“I'm not saying your kid isn’t a challenge. You’re a good buir. You are less likely to fuck up your kid than me.”

“Your kid is going to be fine. She has a whole Tribe there for her.”

“So does yours.”

Teryn smiled at him, then frowned as she saw Rima walk into the med bay followed by the Armorer and Paz. She glanced at Din, worried, and then frowned more when she saw that Vha, who’d been sitting outside in the small garden, looked up and walked in like she’d been summoned. Shoulders slumped, head low. Teryn knew that posture better than any other. You couldn’t walk like that while wearing armor.

She looked back at Din, a feeling of alarm growing in her chest. “Go find the al’verde’s youngest.”

Din immediately started off and she ran into the med bay. How dare they? How dare they even think about talking to Vha without her there? Righteous fury blazed from her eyes, and Tabor quietly pointed to Tuathal’s room.

She barged in without a knock. This was her domain, and Vha was one of hers.

Vha was standing in the corner, looking hunted. Rima looked startled, Paz looked uncomfortable. The Armorer gave no reaction at all, merely looked at Teryn. Tuathal gave a small smile. Teryn went to Vha’s side. “What’s going on?”

“We are trying to ascertain what’s to be done with…”

“Vha. My name is Vha.” Vha’s chin set firmly. “I have no other identity than that.”

Rima nodded. “Vha. Do you have a family name?”

“No.” Vha resolutely didn’t look at her buir. Paz made a soft pained sound.

“I see.” Rima inclined her head. “Thank you. We are trying to figure out what’s to be done with Vha. As a dar’manda…” Vha flinched, but made no sound.

Teryn’s eyes went flinty. “You’ve allowed one. What’s another?”

“Your case is different.”

“Is it?”

Rima shrugged. “To have one’s helmet removed in battle is… we can all agree that’s different from your situation.”

“Is it? The end result is the same. Me, you offer a chance to swear again, a place in your Tribe. Her, you seem prepared to send on her way as soon as she’s strong enough.” Teryn put a protective arm on Vha. “Which is not your call to make.”

“When she’s ready. Not before.”

Teryn narrowed her eyes and the door burst open again. Faris immediately went to Vha’s other side. Din entered more slowly, and at Teryn’s nod, took a place behind her.

“At this point, I know what she needs. She needs to know that her buir loves her. She needs to know that her ori-” Teryn’s voice hitched. “...to know that her vod’ika loves her. That they’ll be there for her.” She felt, rather than heard Din shift behind her. _Guilt._

“I am!” Faris snarled. “I have been this whole time.” He stepped in front of Vha, protective.

Paz sighed again, sagging, his entire frame seeming to deflate. “Ad’ika…”

“No! Don’t call me that. You’ve been… you never thought that what you said about the al’baar’ur had any effect on us. It did. It had an effect on everyone. And you were wrong! She’s not a faithless coward! She’s the bravest person I ever met.” Faris threw his helmet on the floor. “If having to believe that is what it means to be your ad, if that’s what it means to be Mando’ade, then I don’t want it.”

Rima and the Armorer stared at him in shock and Paz put a hand on the wall.

“If you don’t accept her, al’verde, I’ll claim dar’buir and we’ll go.” Vha let out of soft sound of dismay.

“....Ad-” Paz stopped himself and started again, “Faris. You have to understand, the Way, it has cost everything. It cost me two of my ade….”

Faris’ nostrils flared. “It’ll cost you all three.”

Teryn put a hand on his arm. Faris stilled. Angry or not, adults were still to be respected. She tilted her her head, challenging . “Look around. Can we really afford to lose people like this? Are we so armor bound that we…. I saw so many people who lost their souls one way or another… and how many of us are left?”

Tuathal smiled so faintly, so quickly, she almost thought she missed it. But no, it was there.

Vha looked up. She’d been staring down at the floor as this argument about her raged around her. “What about what I want? Isn’t that what you said? I get to decide what living means from now on? Doesn’t what I want mean anything in all of this?”

Teryn let out a breath. “Yes, I did say that. What do you want?”

“I don’t know. I… I don’t know if I want to be a warrior but that’s all I know how to be.” Vha looked at Paz, tears beginning to stream down her face. “Al’verde…”

Something broke in Paz. Something that had been holding on by a shred of stubbornness, that had already weakened and was threatening to give way before. He knew that Faris had been avoiding him, had essentially moved out. How could he not know? He hadn’t known what to say to either one of them, how to begin to approach any of this.

“Buir. Please, ad’ika. Please, I’m your buir. Nothing changed that.” Paz stepped forward. Teryn eyed him narrowly, then slowly stepped to one side, hand on a shock baton, just to make her position clear. Faris scowled at him, as only a 14 year old boy could, then stepped to the other side as Vha gave him a nudge.

“Really?” Vha let out a sob as Paz kneeled in front of her. “I thought…”

“No. It’s… I was wrong, ad’ika. Please… we can…” He continued to murmur brokenly.

Teryn glared at Rima and the Armorer. “This is a family matter.” She turned on her heel and stalked out, followed by Din. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Rima and the Armorer follow them.

“Vod’ika….”

She turned into the storeroom, the one Roccan had given her to reorganize when her nerves got the better of her. With an angry swipe of her arm, she sent a pile of boxes to the floor. “It only changes when it’s someone close to him.” She shook her head. “I know. I know. But…”

“You’re right. It’s shit.” Din sighed, then shrugged. “But here we are.”

“Here we fucking are.” Teryn pressed her fingers to her temples, trying to relieve the tension. “Maybe it’ll go better for her. I hope it does. But. _Fuck this_.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haaaaaa fifty chapters what is happening.
> 
> Okay, so. Obviously, this fic started long before we knew the Child's name, but I wanted to address that in my universe. There's a lot of discussion in the real world about adopting children and stripping them of their former identity to fit in with their adoptive family and culture and... My version of Din wouldn't be cool with that. Not at all. 
> 
> Yes, I fully admit I'm shuffling Cara off screen because of The Discourse and things said by the person who portrays her. I tried to bring back into the story, but.... ultimately, I chose this route.
> 
> AT SOME POINT. SOON. WE WILL GET TO THE WEDDING. I PROMISE. 
> 
> Mando'a Translations:
> 
> Vod'ika: Younger sibling  
> riduurok: Marriage agreement  
> cyar'ika: sweetheart  
> gar morut'yc: You're safe  
> Buir: Parent (diminutive: bu)  
> ad'ika: Little on, child  
> daryc uj'ayl: spiced hot chocolate. Credit to kmandofan90 for coming up with that one  
> tihaar: alcoholic drink - strong clear spirit made from fruit, like eau de vie  
> ori'vod: older sibling  
> ba'buir: grandparent  
> al'verde: commander  
> ade: children  
> behot: herb used in beverages, mildly antiseptic and stimulating  
> verd'ika: Private (rank) Can be used affectionately, often to a child; *little soldier* - context is critical.  
> hibir: student  
> ruug'alor: Old Alor  
> dar’manda: a state of not being Mandalorian - not an outsider, but one who has lost his heritage, and so his identity and his soul - regarded with absolute dread by most traditionall-minded Mando'ade  
> al’baar’ur: Doctor  
> Mando’ade: Child of Mandalore  
> dar’buir: no longer a parent (legal term - parental divorce by child)


	51. Keep singing like they know the score

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which we discuss the importance of names and identities and how they change through one's life.

They’d dropped Cara Dune off at a transport hub, then set off for a trading post San knew. “We can get almost everything we need and they asked for. Equipment, bedding, spice-”

“Spice?” Grey snapped. “I’m not…. Fucking hell, I’m not getting _spice_ for these people, no matter how much-”

“No, idiot. Spices. Pepper. Sont.” San looked at Grey with a mixture of annoyance and pity. “Not everything needs to be a fight.”

“We’re Mandalorians, at least in theory. Everything for us is a fight.”

Din left Teryn reassembling the supply room and went to the creche. It was time for a chat with his ad’ika. “Let’s go for a walk, hm, womp rat?”

Jha’iil’s ears dropped. He could tell his buir was upset about something and he could tell that it was something he had done. He climbed into Din’s arms and waited quietly. Worriedly. Din hummed absently as he walked along to the river, to the same spot where he and Teryn had discussed heavy topics. It seemed the right place.

Din looked around and took off his helmet. Jha’iil -Grogu- looked up at him, one ear beginning to perk up. “Tion gar gai?” _What’s your name?_

Jha’iil frowned. This was silly. Of course his buir knew what his name was. “Jha’iil.”

Din’s mouth tightened as he swallowed. “Grogu?”

Jha’iil’s eyes went wide, his ears went flat, and he buried his face in Din’s cuirass.

“Ad’ika… ni ceta. I… should have asked you if you had a name.” Din patted the kid on the back. “I’m not mad at you. Not at all. But… if you want us to use your true name… we will. You get to choose.”

“Jha’iil.” The kid said into the cuirass. “Ner gai Jha’iil.”

“He didn’t mean to tell us. The old alor, he didn’t mean to. But we know now. Your ba’vodu and the old alor both said you’d tell me what you want, so I’m asking. Names are important. It’s important that the sounds that mean you are ones you want.” He remembered Teryn saying that she’d never changed her name after her excommunications because it was the one thing she had that was hers, the one thing she had that wasn’t given to her by the same people who had put her out in the cold.

He also remembered the smile on her face when they discussed what name she would have after the riduurok and how she could carry the name of the family that was truly hers, not the name of long dead people on a forgotten planet.

“Jha’iil. You gave.”

Din let out a breath. Jha’iil frowned at him, then put a claw on Din’s chin. It wasn’t easy, pushing feelings at his buir. Din wasn’t particularly receptive, like Tuathal, but for something this important, Jha’iil would try. He tried to show how much he loved and trusted his buir, how safe and happy he was with his buir and in this place with all the people he loved best. And how happy he was with the sounds that his buir had made that meant him and no one else.

Din sighed and nodded. “That settles it. If you change your mind, let me know, okay?”

“Okay.” Jha’iil grabbed Din’s ears and pulled his forehead down to his wrinkled green one. Din smiled. One thing taken care of.

Teryn walked slowly back to their quarters after resetting the supply room. Tuathal was sleeping again after drinking his behot. Vha, Paz, and Faris had vanished; Teryn could only hope that was to the good. She didn’t want to talk to anyone else except her riduur. She wanted to snuggle into his shoulder and pour out the stresses she’d been keeping from him.

Lypatri and Upio ran up to her, talking over themselves in excitement. Something about geese she didn’t understand and chose not to worry about and then finally they managed to get out that Lypatri was invited over for dinner and could she go? Please? This time?

“Yes, of course. Mind your manners!” Whatever those were for a half-feral wolf cub.

In their quarters, Cuan was resting, just like he was supposed to. She pulled off some of her armor- the pauldrons and the cuirass and the battle skirt- and curled up next to him. His hand automatically dropped to her head and his fingers buried themselves into her hair.

“I’m going to have to rebraid it if I don’t want people making assumptions about what we’ve been doing.”

He smirked. “We’re going to be married in the eyes of the Tribe in a few days. They assume it anyway.” He massaged her scalp. “How are things with your ori’vod?”

“I told him. I told him everything.”

Cuan’s fingers paused. “And?”

“I think… I think it’s okay. It seemed… I don’t know. But now he knows and I don’t…”

“You don’t have to worry about it anymore.” He smiled. “You can find something else to worry about.”

She sat up and scowled at him, then snuggled back into his chest. He laughed because he knew he was right. “Yes. Like what to do about... “ She sighed. “Vha.”

“Ah.”

“Your alor said she was dar’manda and would go on her way once she was recovered.” Teryn paused and sat up again to look at him. “...I know I wasn’t… completely with it when you said…. When you said that your Tribe wouldn’t consider me dar’manda but…”

He sighed. “Not for what happened to you, no. But in battle… it’s different.” She frowned at him and started to pull away. “It is. Being unhelmeted in a battle is different than by a comrade. That’s just… fucking sacrilege.”

Teryn looked away. “But… is it really different?”

“I… it’s just so appalling to think that anyone would do such a thing. To a vod.” He tightened his hand on Teryn’s head. “As far as… what’s her name? Vha?” At Teryn’s shamefaced nod, he moved his hand to the back of her neck, squeezing lightly. “As far as she goes… Stars, I don’t fucking know. What does she want?”

“She doesn’t know yet.”

“Well,” Cuan said, pulling Teryn back down to his chest. “Once she knows, then we’ll help her find it. Okay?”

“Okay.” Teryn nodded, running her fingers across his other hand. “I didn’t want to worry you with this.”

“Why?”

“Well, you did almost die. A lot has been happening.”

“Mmmm.” He kissed her head. “For both of us. Where’s our kid?”

“I told her she could have dinner with Upio finally.” Teryn shifted guiltily. “We had dinner with my ori’vod’s… um….”

“Friend?”

“Yes. His… friend. And I think she is under the impression we have no idea how to act civilized. I mean, I don’t.”

“What’s civilized?” Cuan chuckled. “We’ve been buire for what, less than a week? Plenty of time to figure it out.”

“I just hope I don’t fuck up our kid before we do.”

“LaarSenaar, did you have a good buir?”

“Yes.” She had. Jha was kind, taught her children well, and worked hard to make sure they knew they were loved.

“You were given a good example of how to be a good buir and how to raise warriors. So did I. We’ll figure it out, together.”

Feralia went to the medbay, looking for supplies to replenish their basic medkits. Sure, they could go to the medbay for anything, it was clear they were to consider the entire convert part of their home- temporary or not- but it just seemed to be a good idea to have basic kits on hand, especially as the children got more accustomed to the freedom and the rough and tumble lifestyle these other Mandalorian children enjoyed.

The young medic- he might wear a helmet but even a vocal modulator can’t hide a cracking voice- brought her to the supply room and told her to take whatever she needed, could she just please make a note of what she took so they could keep the lists current?

Feralia hummed as she looked at what was available. They were well stocked and it was clear there was some method of organization. Hell if she could understand it though. She made some judicious picks- bandages, mild pain killers- sure the few warriors they had had been resistant to them, but they were still useful- some disinfectant. There was already a plague of skinned knees.

There was a soft sound behind her and Feralia turned quickly to see a young woman, barely out of girlhood. Not in armor, hunched over. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to disturb you.”

“You didn’t, I’m almost done.” Feralia considered the young woman. Every other person she’d seen who lived here wore at least some armor all the time. Even some of the children did- they clearly got more as they grew. This woman… didn’t at all.

The al’baar’ur had said they were all warriors. They might have other roles and duties, but in the end, they were all warriors.

Expect, perhaps, this one. This woman who looked lost and alone. “Forgive me for asking, but… are you… are you a part of this Tribe? Either of them?”

The woman looked up, startled. “...no.”

Something in her tone said that this was no simple answer. “So you’re not… a warrior.”

“...not anymore.”

Feralia frowned to herself. She’d seen warriors that had to step away from fighting for one reason or another. Too injured, in body or soul. No longer had the heart for it. Or their armor was damaged beyond repair and they had no armorer who could deal with it.

The Forge was the heart of a Covert and they had none. And when those warriors could no longer do that, they often just… left. Not able to adjust to a civilian life. Feralia had thought that there was something they could do, something that would help them, but she wasn’t sure what it was and so much of their energy had gone into survival that... things were put aside.

People were put aside.

“Well. If you want to spend time with not-warriors… feel free to come by.” Feralia gave Vha a smile and left, frowning. She’d heard things about different Tribes of Mando’ade that took the Resol’nare directive about armor to significant lengths. Her own buir had told her the fact that civilians didn’t wear armor didn’t make them less Mando’ade- they helped support the warriors who did and those warriors protected the ones who didn’t.

“We support each other, ad’ika,” he’d said. “That’s how a society is supposed to work.”

Well, Feralia thought, they’d had a society and then the Purge shattered it. Did it make sense to hold to ideals for a society that no longer existed? Maybe. Maybe not. But now they were in a place where maybe some of the old ways could function again.

And if this woman needed a place? Well, they’d share what they had. They always did. More than one lost soul had been brought into their Tribe.

Vha watched the other woman go.

After the al’baar’ur had stalked out, after the two alors had followed her, she and Paz and Faris left the old alor’s room and went to hers, but nothing more had really been said. Her buir had held her and said he was sorry but nothing had changed, not really. He’d come back to say that he was going away for a while but that he’d be back

Faris told her later that the alors, both of them, had suggested that their buir get off the planet for a while. He’d been stuck with the Tribe for so long that getting out and blowing off some steam seemed like a good idea. Plus he's get a chance to think when there wasn’t anyone demanding responsibilities of him.

“Besides,” Faris said with disgust, “The al’baar’ur wouldn’t want him at her riduurok anyway. She hates him.”

Vha wasn’t entirely sure that was true. The al’baar’ur was _angry_ at him, had been deeply hurt by him, and Vha now knew those wounds wouldn’t heal. But hate? Didn’t seem quite right. She’d seen how well they worked together when the Imperials came.

All she’d ever known was that she would be a warrior. That’s what her destiny had been from the moment her buir had picked her up out of the rubble and then she stolen a pot to wear as a helmet so she could be like her beloved ori’vod. And now? The thought of wearing armor, of battle, of a helmet…. It was too much. Even if it were possible, she didn’t know if she’d want it.

 _No need to decide now,_ she thought to herself. _Soon. But not now._

The next morning dawned cool and a bit damp. Teryn frowned at Tuathal when he demanded to be let back to his own quarters and told him in no uncertain terms that she would make that decision, not him. “But I will have my vod’ad come here, how’s that?”

Tuathal scowled peevishly, then gave her a pat on the hand. “Vor entye, ad’ika. You’ll forgive an old man his gripes.”

Teryn smiled at him. “You’ve earned a few, I’ll give you that.”

Din brought Jha’iil in, freshly bathed and in clean clothes. He set Jha’iil down next to Tuathal and asked, “Do you want me to stay?”

Jha’iil looked at Tuathal, considering, then said, “No.”

Din nodded. “I’ll be back in… half an hour?” Tuathal nodded. “Half an hour. Be good.”

Jha’iil gave him a cheerful smile and a raspberry. Din nodded, running a finger down Jha’iil’s nose, and turned to go.

“Beroya? Do introduce me to your night-sky friend. I’d like to talk with her.”

Din nodded again and left. What could the old alor want to talk to Zake about?

He knew better than to wonder how Tuathal knew he called her “Ca’tra.”

Jha’iil looked at Tuathal solemnly. Tuathal smiled and held out his hand. “N'eparavu takisit, verd’ika. I didn’t mean to tell them about your other name.”

Jha’iil’s ears dropped reproachfully and he projected disappointment.

“That’s fair, verd’ika. But there’s something else I want to talk to you about. Can you bring me that glass of water? No, don’t crawl down. Bring it.” Jha’iil concentrated and was able to bring the glass over, only spilling a little. Tuathal smiled proudly. “Jate.”

Jha’iil trilled, pleased with himself.

“You should be pleased with yourself. You’ve only been here a few months but you've already been able to show much more control. And,” Tuathal held up a finger. “There haven’t been any more outbursts where you scared your friends, right?”

“No.”

“I didn’t think so. I don’t know how much longer I’m going to be able to help you, verd’ika. And I don’t know if there is anyone else who can, but…. I know from when I was younger that this was a Jedi temple. They’re mostly gone, but…” Tuathal sighed. “Maybe there is something in the temple that can help you. I don’t know. And right now things are too uncertain. But I want you to try to remember. Someday, you’ll be in a place where you can look.”

Jha’iil crooned, worried, and put his hand on Tuathal’s chest.

“No,” Tuathal moved his hand. “No, when it’s time, it’s time. I’ve had a long life. A good one. I’ve had great losses but great victories, as well. Remember that. Your life will be long as well. But the people we love... “ Tuathal’s face ghosted in a smile. “They never leave us.”

Jha’iil nodded slowly.

“Never. Remember that your buir, your ba’vodu, her cyare… all the people who love you best will always come for you. Remember that. You need to remember that.”

Jha’iil put a claw on Tuathal’s face, trying to tell him that he’d try, that he’d be good, and brave.

“I know you will, verd’ika. I don’t know what your destiny is, but it’s special. You are special, and through all the tragedy that brought you here, I’m happy to have met you.”

The supply run hadn’t taken as long as they might have expected. San was good at procuring things, got everything on the list and then some. He had some experience in supplying anxious cooks, he knew how to keep them happy.

And, San thought smugly, he’d come in under budget.

Granted, part of the surplus had been spent getting Grey out of lockup when he’d gotten into a drunken fight with someone, and then a bit more went to extra dockyard fees when they couldn’t leave right away due to hangover, but still, it had been a successful trip.

They’d been granted the privilege of knowing precisely where the covert was located and were reminded to be careful about hyperspace trajectories and keeping their nav computers clean. Grey felt the whole thing was deeply condescending but San understood. Secrecy and survival required a healthy amount of paranoia. He’d lived long enough under the Empire to know how many people could keep a secret. And it was always slightly less than the number of people who had a vested interest in keeping it.

They landed and began the unloading process. The bulk of things went to the Taris Tribe but San brought over the cartons that the Nevarro cook had asked for. At least, that’s who he had been told wanted the dates and the cheese and the sea bugs. No one was in the kitchen when he dropped off the cartons. He smiled faintly at the smells. There really was nothing like a proper Mando kitchen.

Teryn went to Kalni’s workshop after she was done with the little work she had to do in the medbay. The baby that had been born a few months before was thriving. Vha was doing.. Well, she seemed to have a bit more of a spark of life in her. Tuathal was napping.

Zake was doing well. Din had said they’d figured out next steps after the riduurok, which meant… they needed to focus on that.

There was a note on Kalni’s door that said “Please knock.” Teryn raised an eyebrow at that- the door had always been standing wide open whenever she had come over. But she politely knocked, and at the inquiry, announced herself.

“Osik! Sorry, ad’ika- hold on a second!” There were sounds of mild chaos then the door opened to reveal Kalni, smiling brightly. Behind her, Upio and Lypatri stood next to the work table, a picture of matching wide-eyed innocence.

Teryn eyed them all suspiciously. “”I came to… make sure my kid was behaving herself.”

“Bu!” Lypatri looked aghast. “Of course I’m behaving.”

Teryn narrowed her eyes, then grinned. “Of course you are, Kurs’ika.” she reached over and tapped Lypatri’s nose. “My little feral cub.”

“What’s feral?”

“Not quite civilized.” Teryn smiled. “Kind of like me.” Lypatri giggled.

Kalni grinned. “Are you here to put your stitches in?”

Teryn nodded. “I’ve never sewn fabric. Just people.”

Upio’s eyes widened at this marvelous information. “That sounds gross!”

Kalni showed Teryn where she could put in a few stitches that wouldn’t be seen, for practice. When those failed to cause any explosions, she moved Teryn over to the bird design. “A few of the feathers here, at the base of the throat. Where the song comes from.”

Teryn frowned and concentrated, trying to make the stitches as neat as possible. “Sutures are easier. If it isn’t quite straight, it’ll heal together, anyway.” The girls watched for a while then scampered off to find some other trouble to get into.

Kalni laughed. “So, tomorrow.”

“Apparently.”

“Are you excited?”

Teryn gave her a slightly abashed look. “I’m excited to have it over with.”

“I’ve been quietly putting it around that they shouldn’t feed you cake and I think Kata is feeling feisty enough to attack anyone who tries.”

Teryn eyed her warily for a beat, then nodded in thanks.

“It’ll be fun. And no one will notice if you leave early. They’ll kind of expect it, to be honest.”

“Vor entye.”

“There’s no debt. It’s your day, you shouldn’t be uncomfortable during it.”

“It’s not my day and we all know it.” Teryn shrugged as she got to the end of the thread. “Should I do more?”

“No, that’s fine.” Kalni grinned. “You should go clean your armor. You want to look your fiercest.”

“It looks really good. I think he’s going to like it.” Teryn smiled again, still hesitant.

“I think he will, too. Oh, one more thing.” Kalni pulled out a folded piece of heavy dark blue fabric. “I know your clan is new and small… but we made this for you, as well.”

It was a long banner, with the mudhorn signet appliqued on in white. Teryn touched it, jaw dropped.

“Your clan needs to be represented, too.”

“.....vor entye… I can’t.. I don’t…”

“There is no debt,” Kalni repeated. “This is one of the ways we support each other.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NEXT CHAPTER IS THE WEDDING. 
> 
> Mando'a Translations
> 
> ad'ika: Little one  
> buir: Parent  
> ni ceta: sorry (lit: I kneel) grovelling apology - rare  
> Ner gai: My name is  
> alor: Chief  
> ba'vodu: parent's sibling  
> riduurok: Marriage agreement  
> Riduur: spouse  
> ori'vod: Older sibling  
> dar'manda: a state of not being Mandalorian - not an outsider, but one who has lost his heritage, and so his identity and his soul - regarded with absolute dread by most traditionall-minded Mando'ade  
> LaarSenaar: Songbird  
> al’baar’ur: Doctor  
> Vor entye: Thank you (lit: I accept a debt)  
> N'eparavu takisit: I'm sorry (lit: I eat my insult)  
> Verd'ika: Private (rank and affectionate nickname for children "little soldier.")  
> Jate: Good  
> Cyare: beloved  
> Osik: Shit  
> Kurs'ika: Wolf Cub


	52. All your curves and all your edges

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WEDDING WEDDING WEDDING WEDDING WEDDINGGGGGGGG

Cuan Tadasco woke up on the morning of his ridduurok with a smile. Before the sun went down, they would be united in the eyes of their Tribes, his beloved LaarSenaar would be officially known as a member of his clan, and they could continue on with their lives. One when they were together, and one when they were apart.

She woke and gave him a smile. “Var’tuur.”

“Ready for today?”

“No. We did the important part already, anyway.”

“We did. But now there will be food.” He fingered a loose strand of hair. “I know it hasn’t been easy. But I don’t know where I’d be without you.”

“Missing a limb or two.” She touched his cheek. “I know where I’d be without you.”

He tucked her under his chin and sighed. He was pretty sure she meant that she’d be dead. Either from Rokr, or Gideon, or something else.

“Thank you,” she said, quietly.

“For?”

“Helping me find my way back to living.”

He kissed her head. “Thank you for coming back.”

Teryn had told him that Tuathal would likely be able to leave the medbay that day, so Cuan went to his ba’buir’s quarters to make sure they were ready for him. The heater needed to be on, the bed needed to be made, a few other things. He had the door open so it could air the place out a little. Even after only a couple of days with no one in it, the rooms were stuffy.

There was a soft knock and he turned to see Atriu, hanging shyly back by the door. “Hey, ad’ika.”

“I’m a verd now. Shouldn’t you stop calling me that?”

“Nah.” He grinned and ruffled her hair.

“So, tonight,” she said, picking up a blanket to fold.

“Yup. Tonight.”

“I wish buir was here.”

Cuan sighed and sat down. “I do, too. He would have liked her. He would have liked her a lot.”

“You think?”

Cuan smiled, tinged with a bit of sadness. “He told me that when I found her, when I found the woman who would be my riduur, I’d know. There’d be a part of my soul that looked at her and said, ‘Yes. Her.’ And he was right.”

Atriu hummed, fingers playing over the edge of the blanket.

“Your buir was many things, slightly irresponsible when it came to everything but you, cheerful, unrepentant, and he had the biggest heart of anyone I’ve ever met. Keeping him from jumping feet first into everything that caught his attention was the hardest job of my life and I’m sorry I couldn’t bring him home to you.” Cuan sighed. “And I’m… I’m heartbroken that he isn’t here with us today.”

“Ni su'cuyi, gar kyr'adyc, ni partayli, gar darasuum, buir.” Atriu murmured.

“Ni su'cuyi, gar kyr'adyc, ni partayli, gar darasuum, vod’ika.” Cuan sighed again. “As long as we remember him…”

“He will always be with us.” Atriu finished.

“And I think he would have had a blast today, annoying Kalni, teasing Kata about her new friend, and trying to get me to eat more uj cake than anyone else. I’m sure he’s mad he’s missing it. But we can only live the life we have, not the one we regret missing.”

“I’m really happy for you, ba’vodu. I know I was a pain in the shebs when you first brought her but… I can see how happy she makes you.”

“I hope I make her happy.”

“You do. Everyone can see it.”

As the day wore on, everyone was busy with something. The smells coming out of the kitchen were intoxicating. The children were all helping with clean up and doing other things with lights and banners and decorations. The ship that took the rescued children back to Corellia came back with stories of government bureaucratic bullshit, but none the worse for wear.

Teryn was told to stay in her quarters until it was time.

She was fine with that. Her armor was clean, their quarters were clean. Kalni brought the undergear. Atriu had shown up and taken the carved bird and the carved wolf cub away. She brushed Atin and played with him as there hadn’t been time to do in far too long. For so long it had been just the two of them (and his asshole siblings when it was cold or rainy or they just wanted food). He’d stuck with her through thick and thin, and not just because she provided breakfast. Having time with just him, where no one could call her away, was a small gift, and she savored it.

Teryn was frowning at her hair when there was a knock at the door.

Zake was there, wearing her blue scarf, a new tunic, and, thank the stars, boots that actually fit. Teryn smiled. “Looks like they found you some things.”

“Yes, thankfully. Your brother’s boots were… well, there’s a reason he’d stopped wearing them.” Zake nodded. “I thought I might ask if you need any help getting ready?”

“I…” Teryn paused, then said, “I was trying to figure out what to do with my hair. I have some ribbons that I thought I could do something with, but I have no idea what.” She held out the spools of ribbons she’d bought on Nevarro -silver and dark red. It seemed like it was ages ago, but really it had been less than three weeks.

Zake nodded, tapping her finger on her chin as she looked at Teryn’s hair and considered. “I know just the thing.”

Teryn sat down in front of her and Zake started braiding the silver ribbons into two plaits, as Teryn normally wore her hair. Zake hummed mindlessly and Teryn consciously let herself be soothed by the motions.

When Teryn was very small and couldn’t take care of her hair, Jha would brush it every night. Short as children’s hair was kept in their Tribe at that time, Teryn’s hair still had a habit of tangling mercilessly. Jha would patiently work out the tangles while telling stories. Teryn sighed quietly.

“Hm?”

“Nothing.”

As Zake finished the second braid, Lypatri tumbled in. “Buir told me I hadda get dressed.” She looked at the ribbons and gasped. “Bu. Can I have ribbons like you?”

Teryn nodded and grinned. “Go get cleaned up and dressed and we’ll see what we can do.” Lypatri whooped and ran into her room.

Zake laughed. “It’s good to see so many happy children.”

“We try to keep them happy.”

“Was your childhood happy? Yours and your brother’s?” She wound the two braids into a coil around the back of Teryn’s head.

Teryn thought about that for a minute. “We did. It was hard, of course. And there was a lot of loss, but… we were safe and loved.” She held very still as Zake wove the dark red ribbon around the coils, taping them to Teryn’s head.

“What made you choose these colors?”

Teryn blushed. “It was silly, maybe, but… the silver is the color of my armor, and the red is his. So…”

“It’s not silly. It’s lovely.”

Lypatri came out, face scrubbed clean and in one of her new sets of clothes. “Bu! It’s _beautiful_.”

Teryn smiled. “Thank you, Kurs’ika. Let’s see what we can do with your hair.”

Zake hummed as she took a look at Lypatri’s hair. “Such lovely curls. I have a few suggestions, if you don’t mind…?” Teryn nodded as Zake finger combed out the curls and wound a silver and red ribbon into a twist that kept it out of Lypatri’s face. Lypatri held herself perfectly still.

Zake finished with the ends of the ribbons hanging down like streamers. “There! Perfect.” Lypatri felt the twists and ran into the refresher to look in the mirror. Teryn and Zake exchanged a smile at her squeal of delight.

Lypatri came out again, grinning. Teryn jerked her head slightly towards Zake, eyes narrowed meaningfully. “Oh, vor entye. Thank you very much.” She looked anxiously at Teryn. “They said that the people who are… the people getting married are supposed to be walked to the Forge by their family. But. You’re both mine. Who should I walk with?”

Teryn cocked her head and took a moment to give that question the consideration it deserved. “Well… what do you think?”

Lypatri lowered her voice. “I think Buir has a lot more family than you do. But I don’t want him to be mad.”

“He won’t be mad. He knows that you…. That you love us both, right?”

“Right.” Lypatri wrinkled up her nose as Teryn ran her finger down it. “Okay. I’ll walk with you and ba’vodu.”

“Thank you, cyar’ika.” Teryn smiled at Zake. “And thank you. It’s… I love it.” Zake nodded graciously as there was yet another knock on the door. Din, armor polished to a sheen, with Jha’iil in a tunic that had the mudhorn signet embroidered on the sleeve. Teryn had to take a second at everyone important to her wanting to look their best for her day.

Din shifted. “Don’t want us to look like poor relations.”

“How can we? Between the two of us we have more beskar than some larger clans.” Teryn smiled faintly. Din chuckled and held out one of the ponchos. She pulled it on and covered her head. Din tucked Jha’iil in one arm and held the other out to Teryn. She took it and they walked to the Samaki Forge. Zake walked on the other side of Din, and Lypatri walked with Teryn, hand tucked in her belt and carrying the package with the gift for Cuan in it. Teryn kept her eyes down and the hood pulled forward so she couldn’t see anything. This moment was about her and her aliit, no one else.

They paused at the door and Teryn turned to Din. “I really wish buir was here.”

“I wish she was, too. She’d… she’d be so happy for you.” Din pressed the forehead of his helmet to the top of her head. “She’d be happy and she’d love him. She’d like it here, I think.”

“I miss her so much.” Teryn took a deep breath and put a hand on Lypatri’s shoulder as she felt her kid press closer. “Okay. I’m gonna go... Do this. We’ll be out in a bit.” She looked down at Lypatri. “Stay with your ba’vodu.” She took the package and went in.

Inside, the Forge was lit and empty except for Cuan. In his full armor, helmet and all. She let out a sigh at the sight of him. Yes, they were already married, yes, she’d seen him in all states, from fully armored to fully not. But here, with his armor freshly painted, gleaming in the light of the Forge?

Fully armed and armored, her warrior was a sight to behold.

He turned and watched as she set down the package and removed the cloak. She could hear his rumble of approval. She smiled. “Hi.”

“Hi.”

She walked forward and took his hands. He rumbled again. “Still want to do this?”

“Yes.” They took a deep breath together, and she grinned at him. “I started it last time. You start it.”

She heard him smile, even though his hands were shaking a little. “Mhi solus tome.”

“Mhi solus tome.”

Again they repeated the marriage vows. One when together, one when apart. Sharing all, raising warriors. Simple. Easy to say, a lifetime to uphold. However long that lifetime was, they were one. United against the galaxy with the strength of their aliit behind them.

He let out a breath and she giggled in relief. That part was over. One more thing to do. He took her hands and put them on his helmet and, with an inhaled breath, she lifted it off his head.

For her Tribe, that privilege was reserved for one’s riduur. No one else.

She set the helmet down and touched his face. He smiled. She took a deep breath. There was one thing she wanted to do before they went to face all of the other people. One thing she wanted to try.

She slid her hands down to his cuirass and hesitantly touched her forehead to his. He let out a soft gasp, sliding his hands down to her waist, but not moving, not wanting to do anything that might break the spell.

It was hard. It was so hard. She could only last for a breath before pulling away and giving an apologetic smile. “I don’t know how often I can do that… but I really wanted to try.”

“Ner kotep LaarSenaar,” he breathed, and pulled her to his chest. “Vor’e, ner cyare.”

She cupped her hand on his cheek. “Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum, Cuan Tadasco.”

“Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum, Teryn Djarin.” They stayed like that for a few minutes more, before Cuan said, “I have something for you.” He held up a folded fur and shook it out.

It was a short cloak, made with wolf fur and lined in dark red. “I’ve been saving it, waiting to give it to my riduur.” She turned around so he could settle it on her shoulders. “Do you like it?”

She turned and smiled. “I love it.”

“It gets cold here in the winter, so…” He nuzzled the side of her head.

“I have something for you, too… it’s not as nice and the tailor mostly did all the work but…” Teryn held out the package and waited anxiously while he unwrapped it. It did look great, and warm, and the bird design was subtle but unmistakable. He traced the embroidery with his fingers.

“Did you help with it?”

Teryn nodded. “A little. Sewing people is easier.”

“It’s beautiful. Thank you.” He pulled her back towards him and kissed underneath her ear. “We should go out there.”

“Can’t we just sneak away?”

“They can’t start eating until we make an appearance and I know they’ve been working really hard on the food, so…” He smiled. “Besides, you should eat something.”

She grumbled, but he was right. She was hungry. With a sigh and a smile, she took his hand and they went out the door.

The entirety of the three tribes, it seemed, was waiting. Teryn’s aliit on one side, Cuan’s ranged behind Tuathal on the other. Cuan and Teryn raised their clasped hands over their heads and everyone cheered. Cuan went to Din first and exchanged arm clasps. Teryn smiled at Tuathal and took his hands, and nodded at Rima.

Rima clasped Teryn’s arm and grinned. “Olarom ner aliit, al’baar’ur.”

Teryn smiled back, and inclined her head. “Teryn. Teryn Djarin.”

Rima laughed. “Vor entye. I won’t abuse it.” Lypatri darted back to Teryn’s side and tucked her fingers in Teryn’s belt as they all walked to where the tables were set up. The banners for both Clan Djarin and Clan Lytau were set up behind a table that had two chairs behind it. Cuan and Teryn took their places. Cuan set his helmet beside his place setting, and picked up a glass of tihaar. Teryn picked up hers and they held them out to the waiting crowd.

“Haat, ijaa, haa'it!” Cuan said. “OYA MANDA!” Teryn smiled at him, then at everyone else, and they drank. Everyone watching cheered again.

The table was laden with things from both families. The bird Cuan carved for Teryn, along with the wolf cub. The small box of dirt from Mandalore Arkil had saved. A bit of brick from the ruins on Jelucan. A small clay tablet with Atin’s claw print on it. A child-sized knife, and Jha’iil’s small silver ball from the Razor Crest.

Teryn looked around and caught Din at the edge of the crowd and smiled at him. He gave a nod.

“What are you thinking, LaarSenaar?” Cuan murmured in her ear.

“That I’m happy.” She could see Kata hovering nearby, looking like she was itching for a fight. Lypatri snuck in between the two of them and Cuan ruffled her hair.

“I have something for you, too, Kurs’ika.” He gestured to Kalni, who brought over a bundle. It was also a short cloak, like Teryn’s, but edged in the wolf-fur. “So you can match your Bu.”

Lypatri gasped in surprise and glee when he put the little red capelet on. Teryn grinned at her. “Go get some food, Kurs’ika.” Lypatri ran her hand on the wolf fur trim and ran off.

They had been provided plates full of delicious food- dumplings of many kinds, curries and pulses, sea bugs in a pepper sauce, and a whole plate of various sweets. Teryn popped a dumpling in her mouth and grinned. “They really went all out.”

Sadet and the Armorer approached the table, each bearing a box. In Sadet’s box were two vibroblades, a matched set. The blades had cut outs and had lovely filigree work on the spine. Teryn’s knife had a bird in flight on the hilt, while Cuan’s had a wolf on guard. Sadet left before they could thank him but Teryn thought he might find the cream she made for stiff joints useful.

The Armorer’s box was larger as she had made them new pauldrons with their new united signet on it- the talon of Clan Lytau hooked over the mudhorn of Clan Djarin. Teryn nodded in thanks and replaced Cuan’s pauldron with his new one. He stood up and replaced hers.

“Vor entye.”

The parade of well-wishers continued. Some with gifts and some without. Staying behind the table kept them from approaching too closely. Their glasses were not permitted to get too empty. Kalni approached with Upio and Eatha, and Lypatri hanging on Upio’s side. “New knives need new sheaths.” The sheath decorations matched the ones on the knife hilts. Lypatri danced in place.

“She let me help make them!”

“They’re beautiful.” Cuan grinned at Kalni. “You were busy for this.”

“Worth it.” Kalni smiled proudly, which turned into a squeal as Din approached, carrying Jha’iil. “Hello!”

Teryn smiled apologetically at Din. “This is my ori’vod and my vod’ad.”

Jha’iil cheerfully let Kalni snatch him from Din’s arms. He knew a sucker audience when he saw one. “I’ve seen you around but we haven’t officially been introduced. I’m Kalni and you look like you could use some cookies.”

“Ice cream?” Jha’iil asked, using his most pitiful expression.

“Of course ice cream! How could you not have gotten ice cream yet?” Kalni whirled away, and Jha’iil gave Din a smug grin over her shoulder.

Din sighed good naturedly. “Am I getting him back?”

Cuan laughed. “Maybe. Not tonight, though. All the kids are sleeping in the mess hall tonight. So the adults can… you know. Adult. The kids love it, and everyone else can relax a bit.”

“Oh.” Din glanced over to where Zake was chatting with Kata. “I see.”

Teryn blinked innocently. “I hope you do.”

“What?”

“Nothing.” Teryn exchanged a grin with Cuan. “Kurs’ika, go get your ba’vodu some snacks, please? Enough to share?” Din glared and she gave him a sunny smile while taking a drink of her netra gal. Somebody had to give him a shove.

Lypatri darted through the crowd. Solde was tossing scraps to Edeemir the strill, while the grumpy man from the Taris ship was saying that wasn’t good for him. “He’s a strill!” Solde said. “They all have stomachs like beskar.”

“You say that until he pukes in my room!”

“I fail to see how that’s my problem.” Solde tossed another scrap and Edeemir jumped up, all six of his paws off the ground, to catch it. Lypatri giggled and scampered on. She saw Vha taking some empty platters back to the kitchens and gave her a cheerful wave.

At one of the buffet tables, Lypatri paused to snag another bean paste dumpling while considering the options for what her ba’vodu would like. One of the Nevarro warriors was peering at the options with an empty plate. “Hey, ad’ika,” he said. “You know what’s here that doesn’t have meat?”

Lypatri chewed on her bun and regarded him solemnly, then pointed to a few things she was… kind of sure didn’t have meat. Mostly. Sort of.

The warrior put the things she pointed to on a plate, said, “Vor’e, ad’ika!” and carried the plate over to Kata, who was chatting animatedly with another woman from the Nevarro tribe. She looked at the plate, laughed, ate one thing, and shook her head at the others. The warrior gestured over toward Lyaptri, and Lypatri darted into the crowd before Kata could see her.

She skidded to a stop in front of Kalni to give Jha’iil a cookie. Jha’iil’s face was covered in ice cream and he was giggling. Kalni grinned, bouncing him on her hip.

Another small child ran by, clearly in the throes of a sugar high, and bounced off Kalni’s leg. Kalni leaned down to help the little girl with fluffy curls to her feet when another woman ran up. “Sorry, sorry! Kurshi, are you done?”

The little girl giggled and shook her head, even as she staggered in a circle. Kalni reached down with one arm to steady the kid and smiled at the woman. “Are you this one’s buir?”

“Feralia,” the woman nodded. “New arrivals.”

“Kalni. I’m the tailor.” Kalni held out a cookie, which Feralia took gratefully. Lypatri exchanged a look with Upio, and the two girls ran off together to deliver the plate of snacks (minus a few choice items) to Din. Then they ran off into the crowd with the rest of the children.

Din politely held the plate to Zake. “I was informed I was supposed to share.” He pointed to a cup filled with a soft cheese. “That isn’t very spicy.”

“Thank you.” She ate the cheese cup. “I suppose you’ll be taking your son to go down for the night soon.”

“No. Apparently all the children will be sleeping in the mess hall.”

“Ah.” Zake nodded to herself, took a deep breath, and drained the last of her tihaar. “Then come with me.”

“What?”

“You’ve never had a proper massage. It’s time you had one.”

As the line of well wishers died down, Teryn decided she wanted more of the dates filled with black pepper and carefully- there had been quite a bit of netra gal and tilhaar- made her way to the desert table. San stood there, frowning at the dishes. He looked up as she approached and smiled.

“Congratulations.”

“Thank you.” Teryn popped one of the dates in her mouth and hummed happily. “These are great, have you tried them?”

San ate one, then stopped in surprise. Slowly, he swallowed and peered at the plate. “....who made these?”

“Our skraan’ur. He went all out, said these were non-negotiable. Something about the sweetness of life and the unexpected spiciness… of… something…” she trailed off as San turned and strode the kitchen with purpose. She shrugged and ate another date. No one was going to expect a damn thing out of her tomorrow and she intended to capitalize on it.

San paused at the door to the kitchen and realized his hands were shaking. After all this time… he knocked and at a muffled call, went in.

He didn’t recognize the armor of the man standing at the stove. He didn’t recognize the helmet. But he could tell the set of the shoulders of his beloved anywhere. “...it’s you.”

“Hm?”

“How… just… gods, Kreez, please, turn around.” San’s voice was shaking. Kreez very deliberately took the pot he was stirring off the fire, set it down, and turned around.

His riduur stood in the doorway, eyes gleaming with hope and relief and shock. The riduur he’d left behind on Mandalore, during the Purge. The riduur he’d almost given up hope of ever seeing again.

“Cyare?”

San -Sanbras- rushed forward and they crashed together, hands scrabbling to touch everything, everywhere. “Where have you been?”

“Everywhere. Nowhere. You’re alive. You’re _here_.” Kreez’s hands went to his helmet, and years -years!- of habit stopped him. “....we’re still… you’re still my riduur?”

“Stars, _yes.”_ Sanbras groaned. “Gods yes. Take that off.” He let out a sigh as his beloved’s face came into view. After 11 years, endless hardships, they were together. They pressed their foreheads together. Whatever came next could wait until morning. Now was for them.

Once everyone had a first crack at the food, music started up, with some people dancing around the fire. Teryn was content to just watch. She’d never really learned any dances, nor did she feel like singing. She just wanted to be with her wolf, and let the happiness swirl around her. Everyone was here. They were here, they were alive, they were safe.

Tuathal came over. “I am heading in. But I wanted to say again that I am so happy for you both.”

Cuan took his ba’buir’s hand. “Thank you.”

Tuathal turned his head to the sounds of his people. “I always loved celebrations like this. Always have. Even more after the Purge.”

Teryn tilted her head, waiting for him to continue.

“For everyone that has tried to destroy us, we’re still here. Every moment we get like this is a shout to the stars. We’re still here. We still live. And we will continue to live. To hunt.”

Teryn smiled at him. “We do. We will.” Tuathal turned and walked towards his quarters. Teryn watched Atriu peel off and take a place at his side, just in case. She smiled.

Cuan nuzzled her hair. “Want to get out of here? I don’t think they need us anymore.”

“Yes.”

Quietly they stood up and made their way into the night, the sounds of celebration and life echoing behind them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Both arts are by KMandofan90. The picture of Tery and Cuan I asked her to draw specically for this chapter. The knife she drew MONTHS ago when I asked her "what kind of knife would you get T at her wedding?" That kind. I LOVE THEM BOTH SO MUCH. 
> 
> We're coming to the end of Sha'kajir. Not the end of the series, but the end of this particular part of the story. Next week will wrap things up. 
> 
> (The beginning of Kreez and Sanbras' story can be found in De Re Coquerina) 
> 
> Mando'a translations
> 
> ridduurok: Marriage agreement  
> Var'tuur: Morning  
> Ba'buir: grandparent  
> verd: soldier  
> Buir: parent (Diminutive: Bu)  
> Riduur: Spouse  
> Ni su'cuyi, gar kyr'adyc, ni partayli, gar darasuum: Daily remembrance of those passed on *I'm still alive, but you are dead. I remember you, so you are eternal.* Followed by repetition of loved ones' names.  
> vod'ika: younger sibling  
> Shebs: Ass  
> ba'vodu: Parent's sibling  
> Kurs'ika: Wolf cub  
> vor entye: Thank you  
> Cyar'ika: sweetheart  
> Aliit: family, clan  
> Mhi solus tome: One when we're together  
> Ner kotep LaarSenaar: My brave songbird  
> ner cyare: my beloved  
> Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum: I love you  
> Olarom ner aliit: Welcome to the family  
> Al'baar'ur: Doctor  
> tihaar: alcoholic drink - strong clear spirit made from fruit, like eau de vie  
> Haat, ijaa, haa'it: Truth, honor, vision - words used to seal a pact.  
> Oya manda: Expression of Mandalorian solidarity and perpetuity: emotional and assertive.  
> ad'ika: Little one, kid  
> skraan'ur: Cook


	53. But the middle of nowhere's where I likes it best

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A waypoint in the story, where we can all take a breath and relax for a bit. 
> 
> Happy New Years, everyone. 
> 
> Art by SRed.

The day after the riduurok celebration was quiet. People emerged from their quarters in various states of pain and hungover, and more than one person seemed remarkably smug.

Rima was deeply pleased. The sentry rotation had gone well. The children all had a riotous time in their giant slumber party. The food had been excellent, even if the Nevarro kitchens stopped sending trays out abruptly in the middle of the evening.

She nodded to herself. There were still things that needed to be sorted out but the day could be used to rest and recover. It had been a good night that promised a new beginning for them all. Perhaps that was a lot of place on the shoulders of one happy couple, but she’d take it.

Later that afternoon, Feralia looked around at her Tribe. “So we’re agreed?”

They all nodded and San grinned. “I told you. You’re our alor.”

Feralia gave him a scowl. He was in an annoyingly smug mood for someone who completely disappeared the night before. “And we all are in agreement that we should try to make it work here?”

The entire Tribe nodded again. San had told her that no matter what they decided, he was staying. He hadn’t told her why, but he’d been pretty firm about it. Then there was the issue of allowing their children to grow up safe and as the Mando’ade they were.

Some people expressed concerns. How would they fit in with these warrior Tribes? What did they bring to the table?

Someone else had pointed out that at least one of the children had shown an aptitude for metalwork, and here they could learn how to actually become an armorer. “And they all fought when they were kidnapped. They’re Mando’ade. We’re Mando’ade. We should stay.”

Feralia had given a confident smile. “If we’re trying to build a society, we all bring things to the table. We can help them, they can help us. We support each other, that’s what my buir told me.”

Later, she walked to Rima’s office where she’d requested a meeting with the other two alors. If they were going to do this, if they were going to have three Tribes in this one place, they needed to figure out they’d make it work.

Rima smiled. She had also had this thought, as had the Armorer. They needed to work out a system of how decisions that affected all three tribes were made, how to allocate resources.

In the back of the mess hall there was a room with a large table in it. Rima, the Armorer, and Feralia looked around and nodded. This would do. They each took a seat at the table, and they began to discuss.

“We have a few people who did animal husbandry before the Purge, they’ve noted that this is a good place to raise hogs….”

Teryn emerged in the afternoon feeling well pleased with herself. The evening hadn’t been as bad as she’d feared. It was even, if she dared admit it to herself, a little fun. The children had been released to their buire in the late morning and almost all of them required naps.

She found Din at the edge of the field watching Jha’iil play with Atin. Jha’iil was making some leaves fly around and Atin was alternating between chasing the leaves and gently knocking Jha’iil over. Jha’iil would giggle madly then pick himself up. It was their favorite game.

Teryn handed Din a mug of fresh behot with a straw. He nodded in thanks.

“How was your night?” she asked, amusement dancing in her eyes.

“Fine.”

“Did you talk about what she’s going to do now?”

Din grunted. “Didn’t really have a chance to talk.”

Teryn raised her eyebrows and said sweetly, “But you two left so early.”

“Shut up.”

Teryn let out a peal of laughter that echoed around the trees. Din found himself smiling. She was happy, happier than he could ever recall seeing her, even as children. Teryn sat down and they watched Atin and Jha’iil dance around each other.

“Some people take a trip after they get married,” Din said. “Will you?”

“We talked about it, but if we do it won’t be for a while. Not for several months at least. His ship still needs to be completely gutted and refitted. Plus leaving Kurs’ika again so soon wouldn’t be fair to anyone.”

Din nodded. That made sense.

“What about you? Are you planning on leaving soon?”

“Not for a while. I asked your scrapper friends to give the Crest a going over - she needs it- and I promised him we’d stay put. Do my time training the Foundlings. Rest a little. It’s been a while.” Jha’iil toddled over for a snuggle. Din obligingly picked him up and before too many minutes had passed, Jha’iil was starting to snore. Atin hopped up on Teryn’s lap for his own nap. They sat in contented silence.

“You know,” Teryn started after a while. “After… Gideon, after everything, Kurs’khaded asked me what I wanted. If I didn’t have to worry about anyone else, what did I want? Do you know what I told him?”

“No. What did you say?”

“I said I wanted yaim’la. I wanted a home.”

Din smiled and nodded. “Seems like you got it.”

“I did.” Teryn turned to look at him. “I got what I wanted. What about you? What do you want?”

Din sighed, looking at his child, then looking around at the place that had become their home in only a few short months. Where his Tribe was settled in the sun, where his aliit was.

“I want him to be safe. To grow up happy. To have a home he can come back to when he needs to.”

Teryn nodded. “We all want to give our ade the things we never had. It’s the nature of parenthood.”

“You’ve been a parent for like a week.”

Teryn punched him in the arm. “Shut up.”

Din sighed again as Jha’iil snuggled closer. “I can’t promise him any of that while Gideon is still alive.”

Teryn nodded. He was right. Gideon’s very existence threatened them all, but it was Jha’iil he threatened the most. “Then let’s go get the fucker.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So.... this brings us to the end of Sha'kajir. This is not the end of the Dar'Manda series, but Sha'kajir was always going to end with the wedding. I'm going to be taking a bit of break from the main series- I've been updating this weekly or more since the end of February! But there might be some one-shots (Kreez has some stuff to do) before we get into honeymoon shenanigans and then going after Gideon. 
> 
> Thank you everyone for going on this journey. Your comments have all been delightful. Writing this has helped me get through this disaster of a year. Thank you to SRed and Kmandofan90 for their arts, Different Frequency, LiaLuna, and HDLynn for the idea bouncing, and most especially to Isolde_Archer for being a very good and patient beta reader. I can be found on tumblr at magsgotswags. 
> 
> Mando'a Translations 
> 
> Riduurok: Marriage agreemnt  
> Alor: chief  
> Mando’ade: Children of Mandalore  
> Buire: Parents  
> Behot: herb used in beverages, mildly antiseptic and stimulating  
> Kurs'khaded: Wolf  
> Kurs'ika: wolf cub  
> Yaim'la: comfortable, familiar, sense of *at home*. Can also mean local to the speaker.  
> ade: children

**Author's Note:**

> I made a Spotify playlist (Dar'Buy'ce) of all the songs T sings and where the chapter titles are coming from.
> 
> https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5R2q3yZ0YAfiYpy7wEDpMw


End file.
